This family is cursed
by BananaPudding
Summary: It's one thing that Sam and Dean had a long lost sister- It's another when they start to realize she might not be what she seems- Is she a monster, demon, or something else? When the secret comes out, one brother wants to use her as a weapon, while the other wants to ignore it- *Starts at season 5* (There's some language, so if you have sensitive eyes don't read )
1. Chapter 1

**(First of all this is the first fanfic I've ever written, so don't judge me lol. So we'll see how it goes. I'm new to this whole thing so I don't know if I have to post that of course I don't own supernatural, no matter how much I wish I did because then I could be their god and make them do whatever I wanted, mouhaha. Ok. So there ya go. Obviously this is an AU as you will tell because Lucifer is out of his cage in 2013.)**

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_~ May 16 2013_

_This is probably going to be my last entry for quite a while- Things are starting to become... Risky. Possibly even more so than before. It has come to my conclusion that I can't avoid it any longer. I have no choice now, I have to find them. My brothers. They're out there somewhere, fighting in a paranormal world that regular people don't even know exist._

_Sam and Dean... I don't know if they even know who I am. John certainly made it a point to tell me that going to them, no matter what the circumstances, was not an option. And I agreed to it, for the most part. After all, I'm twenty two now, and haven't even considered going to them for help. But I've simply run out of options. Everyone I know and trusted is dead. The fellow Hunters that John Winchester, aka my Father, told me about are gone. They're being picked off one by one and I have no idea why._

_This isn't exactly the way I wanted things to go down. The last thing I want to do is endanger the lives of the only family members I have left in the world, but- What else am I supposed to do? He is after me, and I have no idea why. Yeah, maybe I am the long lost daughter of John Winchester, maybe I do have two brothers that are also Hunters and base their lives on killing the supernatural, but what reason would he have to want me? Yes, maybe I am a hunter as well, but a very low grade hunter. I steer clear of any jobs that even remotely smell like demons. Why? Because John told me to. And, since he was my Dad, I guess I feel that I have to honor that request- No matter how stupid I think it might be._

_But, as I said- This is going to be my last entry for a while. I'm placing this journal in a safe deposit box in Detroit Michigan, with strict instructions to the only person I trust now, Bobby Singer- That in the event of my death, or if he finally gets me, it will be given to my only surviving relatives. My brothers. In the mean time, I'm going to try my best to get to them because, seriously, I have no other choice. I can only hope that Sam and Dean actually accept me, or even believe me. Who knows, they might think I'm full of shit. After all, a stranger suddenly popping out of the woodwork announcing that they're a sibling... Yeah... I wouldn't be inclined to believe that person either. So, we'll see how it goes. Along with my personal journal is a manila envelope of our Fathers. It hasn't been opened since the day he gave it to me, as so requested by him. What's inside, I have no frickin clue. He told me to keep it safe and that's what I've done, and to only open it, ONLY on the day that we realize there's no way out._

_Whatever the hell that means. Nice job, John- Confusing us with riddles. Being Hunters, we live everyday thinking we might not have a way out of the shit-pile we call our lives. Next time, Daddy dearest- Try being more specific._

_So yeah, that's it. Hopefully I can get to my brothers in time. If not, I'm dead, or... Worst case scenario... He has me._

_Signed, Lara Winchester ~_

I slammed the journal shut, clasping it with a frayed piece of twine that had seen one too many days, the leather covering was faded and cracked- My Fathers initials, J.W, just barely noticeable in the bottom right corner. He had given it to me before he died, a journal that he intended to use- But never had. So I took the liberty of filling it with somewhat drunken entries, or simply using it to jot down the mounds of crap I had to live through everyday. It was my only way of somehow letting my brothers know that I actually existed, that is- If I died before meeting them face to face.

After finishing with the journal, and the envelope which I took a long look at- I finally lied them in the safe deposit box.

Of course I wanted to open the envelope. There was something noticeably thick inside of it, possibly a book- But I resisted the curiosity. I had succeeded in honoring Johns wishes thus far, I wasn't about to go and screw that up now no matter how badly I wanted to know what he hid in there. Besides, maybe one day I could actually open it. Something told me that I would be returning to that bank sooner rather than later.

I filled out the necessary paperwork, using the alias Regina Banks. Fake SS number, drivers license , the whole works. I wasn't stupid- John had told me everything I needed to know when I was just a kid on how to survive in this world. No, it wasn't exactly the most honorable lifestyle, what with identity theft and what not, but it was needed. I had been fleeing for my life ever since John died, and before that, had been schooled as much as possible by other Hunters. I had the drill down pat- No I might not have been hunting as long as my brothers, or anyone else for that matter- But seeing is that I was still alive, and being a female, only twenty two, I figured that was a big accomplishment.

There was a part of me that very much so didn't want to leave that envelope in the lock-box, but I figured it would be the safest place for it. First thoughts were to take it to Bobby, have him hide it somewhere, but I changed my mind. John had told me that no one was to know of its existence, not even his closest allies. So, there went that idea. Locking it away in a bank was the next best thing I suppose. With that in mind, I made sure to keep my eye on the well dressed woman that locked it in its slot, afterwards she handed me the key.

"There you go, Miss Banks, is there anything else we can do for you today?"

"That's all." I shoved the key in my jeans pocket for now. "You have my number if there are any problems."

She gave me an odd look after that. It was obvious by the two small contents in that box they more then likely weren't something extremely valuable- So of course she was curious as to why I was so damned protective over them. In order to avoid her questionable expression, I quickly entered the main lobby of the bank and took out my cell, scrolling through the names listed there until coming to the one man who could tell me where the hell my brothers were.

Bobby Singer.

I hit the call button and waited as it rang once, twice and finally three times before he picked up.

"Yeah?" Was the gruff voice on the other end.

"Bobby, it's Lara." I said, exiting into the busy street.

"Lara, damn- I haven't heard from you in..."

"Yeah, we'll have to skip the usual sentiments right now, man. I need to know where Sam and Dean are."

There was silence on the other end for nearly thirty seconds.

"Why do you need to know, Lara? What sort of trouble are you in?"

"I can't talk about that right now. Do you know where they're at?"

He grumbled something under his breath.

"Last I heard those idgets were in Lafayette Indiana, dealing with some sort of demon infestation."

Now I was the one to grumble, only it was curses. Just my luck, it had to be demons.

"If it's an infestation why aren't you there helping them out?"

"Let's just say they have all the backup they need. Listen, Lara- You know just as well as I do that your Dad made it clear to stay away from those boys, why do you wanna find them?"

"I said I can't talk about it right now."

He went silent for the second time as I made my way back to my car, a black 68 mustang convertible. Gift from my grandparents, what can I say?

"Why don't you head on down here, Lara. We can talk this out." He finally said.

"Can't." I jumped in my car and slammed the door. "First I need to find Sam and Dean. Can you give me the specifics of their job right now?"

"Damn, you're just as stubborn as them. All I know is that Lafayette was practically lit up like a neon sign with demon omens. They went to check it out, had something to do with an old factory."

"Which factory?" Already I was tapping on my i-pad and googling everything I needed to know about Lafayette Indiana.

At first glance, there was nothing really spectacular about this city. Nothing that, in my opinion, would gather the attention of a hoard of demons anyways.

"An old tire factory by the looks of it. Closed down about two years ago. It's mainly just used for storage now." He answered.

"What would demons want with an old tire factory?"

"Ain't sure. Last I heard from Dean, he thought they were using it as a nest of some sort."

"A nest? They aren't vampires, what the hell?"

"Things are getting sticky. They need a place to hide out. More and more hunters, among other... _People_- Are sniffing them out."

Obviously I noticed his emphasis on the word "people". For the moment I didn't know what he meant by that, and for the moment, didn't care.

"When was the last you spoke to them?" I asked now.

"Yesterday."

I started up my car and pulled out of the parking lot, already with the GPS set to guide me to Indiana.

"Lara, is there any way I can convince you to wait this out. Ok, if you insist on seeing your Brothers, fine- But can't ya just wait until they're through with this job?"

"I don't have the luxury of choosing anymore, Bobby. I'm sure I'll explain it to you later, but right now- I need to find them."

He cursed again quietly.

"Are you in danger?"

"When have I not been in danger is the better question."

"But, is it different this time? That's a stupid question, obviously it is if you're actually going to find Sam and Dean."

"I'll explain later, Bobby. If you hear anything from them can you at least call me and let me know?"

He sighed deeply, and I just knew he was shaking his head at an empty room.

"I'll let ya know."

"Thanks, talk to you soon."

After the call ended I tossed my phone to the seat beside me and settled in for a long drive


	2. Chapter 2

**(Yet again I don't own supernatural, but maybe one day my wish will come true)**

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This so called factory that Bobby told me about looked, more or less, like it had been hit with a nuke. The windows were shattered, the tin roof seemed as though it had been peeled away, leaving curled strips of jagged metal scattered on the pavement. Combine all of that with the dark surroundings, and the dead quiet, it wasn't exactly a building I wanted to traipse into alone. If Bobby hadn't of called me fifteen minutes before hand letting me know that they were definitely there, I would have turned around and left. Instead, I parked the car under the shadows of a tall oak tree, hoping it would be successfully hidden from view should anyone take a peak out a window.

After rummaging through my trunk and grabbing the usual necessities- Such as, a sawed off shotgun loaded with salt rounds- A flask filled with holy water, and a pistol which I crammed down the front of my jeans- I waited in the darkness inspecting every window or door in view.

The place was dead quiet, which could either be a good thing, or if you're a hunter- A very very bad thing. Quiet usually means that whomever had the misfortune of stepping inside was now lying in pieces on the floor.

There was one lone light shining off to the side of the building, which was flickering on and off every thirty seconds. In between the flashes I darted from my car, rushing to the first door I could think of that would let me inside inconspicuously.

There was a fire escape on the left hand side of the building, the rusty steps looked too dangerous for my five foot five, one hundred and thirty pound frame to tread. But it was my only option. It would take me to the second level, and something told me that whoever might have been inside would be on the ground floor.

As I as quietly as possible started up the steps, I stopped halfway to peak inside a busted window. For the moment, I couldn't see anything but then had a sudden realization. If this place was indeed chock full of demons, then I couldn't very well go in there by myself. Not only would be it be suicidal, but incredibly stupid on my part. So, I turned and headed back down the stairs and rounded the back of the building noticing a small supply shed.

Already I knew what I was going to do, if it would actually work that is. Inside this supply shed was the mechanisms, and water supply for the indoor fire sprinklers. I learned this trick from my old pal Bobby, and had to silently thank him as I recited the proper chant and dropped my rosary into the tank. Nothing like a giant batch of holy water to use, just in case.

Honestly, I had no idea how to take down a demon, since I had never encountered one in the past. Sure, I knew how to exorcise them, what to say and do, but had never actually attempted it. Devils traps were handy so I heard, but actually getting a demon into one wasn't something I was familiar with. Basically, this was one of the only times that I was actually hesitant to enter a dangerous situation.

Still, I had come this far, and my brothers were supposed to be in there. I couldn't leave now, especially if they were in trouble. So, yet again I started up the fire escape, and pushed my way inside a halfway open door.

I had my shotgun at the ready, carefully stepping over random pieces of debris which consisted of broken glass and empty cardboard boxes. This place looked just as bad on the inside as the outside. The moonlight poured through the holes in the ceiling providing just enough illumination to guide me through a short narrow hallway. The first open door I came to was a control room which was lined with windows.

I could clearly hear voices from below the room, and as I crept slowly along and peaked out one of the windows- I could see down into the main area of the building.

Old conveyer belts, empty crates and an indoor crane device was all that remained of this so called factory, but that wasn't what interested me.

Clearly standing in the middle of the massive room was several figures, I counted nine in total. It didn't take long to realize who exactly was a demon and who wasn't. Three men were cornered with their backs against the wall- Two held their arms up in the typical prisoner fashion, while the third man, one wearing a suit and trench-coat, was trapped in the middle of a burning ring of fire.

Odd, I thought- And the site instantly made me arch both brows in confusion. I knew the two men with their hands in the air were Sam and Dean, judging by the stories I had heard, they fit the descriptions perfectly. But the third man, I had no idea who he was, or why he was surrounded by fire. For a moment I actually cursed slightly, because seeing is that there was a fire in the building- That meant the sprinkler system must not have been functioning, which of course posed a difficult situation.

Since I was up in the control room I couldn't hear what was being said- But it was obvious that these demons were interrogating them somehow. Which meant I had, at best, a few minutes to figure out something.

"Friggin demons." I murmured quietly to myself.

My eyes darted across the room and back, trying to figure out a way to somehow fix this. Really, I was way out of my elements here with this one- I was accustomed to dealing with normal things, such as pissed off spirits, or vamps, but demons. No, no way- This wasn't something I could handle by myself. Really, the only thing I had going for me was the holy water sprinkler system.

I glanced to my right and noticed the fire alarm. This place hadn't been completely abandoned, there was still electricity, and it was clearly being used for storage. I figured it wouldn't hurt any to at least push the damned button- Worst case scenario is that it wouldn't work. So, I slithered across the floor to the bright red button hidden behind a pane of cracked glass. I had seconds to smash the glass, being exposed might I add, and punch that damn button. As soon as the glass would shatter the demons would be on to me. With a deep breath I reached up after covering my hand with my jacket sleeve, and with a quick punch the glass broke and the button was smashed down.

To my utter delight the bells starting ringing and the sprinkler started spraying- Soon after the sound of agony filled screams overpowered everything else. Gunshots followed suit.

I moved back to the window in time to see Sam and Dean fighting there way through the demons, Sam swinging a knife which, somehow, killed the creatures instantly. The man stuck in the fire, for the moment had completely disappeared only to reappear on the opposite side of the room. He stopped a demon who was trying to escape by pressing his hand against his forehead. A horrible bright light filled up the entire room as the demon let out a wail that practically rumbled the pit of my stomach. He fell to the floor dead as well.

Now was my time to get the fuck out because I knew that this couldn't have been this hoard that Bobby spoke of. No, more then likely more would be on their way after this.

I left the way I came, down the fire escape and rushed across the large parking lot and back to my car. After jumping in the drivers seat I fired up the engine and floored it- Successfully fishtailing away from the tree and towards the building just in time as the three men ran outside. I squalled the tires as the car jerked to a stop.

"Get in!" I called out, pushing open the passenger side door.

Naturally they wanted to object, but didn't- Because I could hear yelling in the background from the leftover demons. They quickly piled in, the man in the trench-coat was the last to enter the passenger seat and closed the door.

I floored it a second time and flew from the parking lot and onto a quiet side street, keeping my eyes fixed partly on the road, and partly on the rear view mirror.

"Who the hell are you?" Whom I presumed to be Dean asked. After all, the leather jacket with the popped collar and gruff voice pretty much gave it away.

"Let's skip the introduction for right now, Dean-" I answered. "In case you forgot, there are demons after us."

I could see his expression from the mirror, which was clearly confusion, I shifted my eyes to the giant sitting beside him. He shared the same expression as Dean. The man in the trench-coat looked completely blank, although he was gawking at me with a tilted head.

I passed a few quick glances at him, furrowing my brows at his blatant staring before returning my attention to the road.

"And you're welcome by the way. " I added, after turning a sharp left down another side street.

"For?" Dean asked.

"Saving your ass back there. You were trapped by those demons- Trench-coat boy somehow got himself stuck in a circle of fire so I rigged the fire alarm with holy water and flipped it on." I yet again glared at Dean from the rear view mirror. "So, you're welcome."

"It was holy fire. If I pass through the flames then I would die instantly." The man beside me said. Yet again I passed a short glance at him, trying to understand who the heck he was.

"Just how did you know where we were in the first place? No, wait." Dean leaned forward. "I would rather you tell me just who the hell you are."

"Do you have a specific place to crash that's safe?" I asked, instead of answering his question.

"What?"

"Did you have a safe-house before going out on this job, or did you just go out with guns blazing and not have a plan for afterwards?"

Sam and Dean exchanged looks.

"Uh." Sam cleared his throat. "Generally we don't have a plan for after."

I sighed deeply and shook my head.

"Well that's nice. Good thing I took precautions before heading out to that factory."

I ignored their questions after that, much to their aggravation, and drove for nearly thirty minutes before the city was behind us. In the country down a gravel road was an old farm house, which I had rigged with devils traps and warding spells. After the car pulled to a stop I didn't even remove the key from the ignition before they piled out of the car.

I knew what to expect now. Sam and Dean were notorious for being untrustworthy. They relied solely on each other and weren't exactly open to accepting strangers into their circle. No doubts I was about to be bombarded with questions and tests. They would want to be certain I was human, naturally- And wouldn't believe anything that came out of my mouth.

"Alright." Dean stood in front of me. "Enough of the mystery. Who are you?"

Sighing, I glanced from man to man trying to figure out a way to say it. No matter how I phrased it, whether I said it gently or just spit it all out at once- It would gain the same results.

"Well, you'll be inclined to think I'm full of crap, but I'm your sister." I finally said.

Sam immediately snorted out a sarcastic laugh, the man in the trench-coat still stood blank, Dean however, his arms fell to his sides.

"You don't think we would actually fall for that... Did you?" Sam asked. "We don't have a sister."

"Yes you do. Listen, I don't exactly feel like sitting here and arguing with you over this- And I'm sure you'll be demanding some sort of proof, which at the moment I don't have. But, if you really insist on it, then call Bobby. He'll tell you everything."

Sam looked to Dean for some sort of backup, instead he asked.

"Lara? You're Lara?"

I tried to resist the urge to crack a smile.

"You know about me?"

"Wait a second." Sam moved to stand in front of Dean. "You mean- She's not lying? We really do have a sister?"

Dean obviously didn't want to answer that question.

"Well, Dad sort of told me about her a while back. I was just a kid at the time." He said.

"What?" Sam stood tall, clenching his jaw. "We've had a sister this entire time and you never bothered to mention her?"

I raised my hand. "Um, do you think we could talk about this inside where it's partially safe?"

I started for the door and they followed, once inside I flicked on a battery lantern which lied on a decrepit table.

"Ok, you can resume the arguing." I said sarcastically, taking a seat and watching.

They stared at me for a moment before Sam shook his head.

"Why wasn't I told about her a long time ago?"

"Because Dad didn't want you to know, Sammy. You know how you are, all sentimental and crap- He knew you would probably want to go and meet her, which he said would be _stupid_- Because Lara was growing up normal. He didn't want her to be dragged into this life. He said she had a chance." Dean paused, eying me up and down. "Apparently though somehow that plan went out the crap-shoot. Because you seem pretty damned certain on how to get out of a mess with demons."

I shrugged. "I guess I'll take that as a compliment."

"So, you're a Hunter too then?" Sam asked.

"I'm not exactly sure if I would go as far as calling myself a "hunter". I don't intentionally go out looking for jobs- I'm more about keeping myself safe. But yeah, I've been around a block or two as far as the paranormal goes."

"So Dad was the one to teach you?" Dean asked.

"Him, and other Hunters. Bobby mainly. Since John was hardly ever around I relied on him the most. Honestly, Bobby was more of a Father than John ever was."

Both brothers looked at each other. "Yeah we can kinda relate with that." Sam replied quietly.

"Now the question is why you're here. Since you've obviously known about us for... Well forever, why now did you decide to come find us?" Dean asked.

Yet again, I shrugged.

"I had to." Was my response.

"Why? Are you in trouble?" Sam asked now.

"Sort of. Although, I have no idea why. Before we get into that though, why don't you tell me what's going on with you two-" My eyes shifted to the man in the trench-coat. "And, exactly who he is."

"My name is Castiel. I am an angel of the Lord." Was his reply.

Dean grumbled something and shook his head. "Dammit, Cas- You need to stop announcing that to everyone we meet."

"An angel?" I closed my eyes, and tried to contain myself. "So, it's all true then. The rumors I've heard through the grapevine?"

"What rumors would that be?" Deans voice was slightly unnerved.

"Oh, that you were in hell, you were brought back, Sam brought on the apocalypse by letting Lucifer out of his cage. Blah blah blah."

Silence filled the room for what felt like minutes on end. Everyone was gawking at me, noticeably shaken.

"Where exactly did you hear that?" Sam was the first to break the silence.

"I said, through the grapevine. Hunters talk, it doesn't take long for news like that to spread. Of course, I didn't exactly believe it. No offense to you-" I looked to Castiel. "But I never was one to believe much in angels, so I was ready to blow this entire thing off. Apparently I was wrong though to question it."

"What else do you know?" Dean asked now.

"Enough. Do I really need to go into all of it?"

"You want us to trust you? Yeah."

"You're not going to trust me no matter what I say." I snapped back. "I know how the two of you are."

"Try us." Sam said. "If you're our sister, then you should at least trust _us _enough to talk to us."

"Cute." I stood, putting my hands on my hips. "You might be my brothers but that doesn't mean we suddenly have a sibling bond. I came to you now because I didn't have any other choice. My life is in danger and learning that this whole Angel and apocalypse thing is real just reaffirms my suspicions on what the hell is going on."

"Why exactly do you think your life is in danger?" Castiel asked.

"Because Lucifer is after me." I finally admitted. "He wants me, for one reason or another, and has been trying to find me."

Yet again, more silence- Only now Dean and Sam looked to Castiel.

"Do you know anything about this?" Dean asked.

"No. I am unaware of quite a few details concerning Lucifer. My speculation is perhaps he believes he can get to Sam, using your sister as bait."

"That might have worked had Sam actually known I even existed, but I don't think that's it." I said now.

"How do you even know that Lucifer is after you in the first place?" Dean stole my chair and sat down after speaking. "And don't say you heard it through the grapevine."

"I have contacts. Certain Hunters that have dealt with demons gained some sort of intel. My name is mentioned in nearly every instance. Lucifer wants me and has been trying to find me. But for some reason, he can't. So he's sending out his little minions to do his dirty work."

"Well, no offense, _sis_-" Dean said sarcastically. "But you've pretty much just led him straight to you, because Lucifer wants Sam too and we've been trying to dodge him."

"Yeah, I didn't really know the exact specifics, just ya know, the whole hell and apocalypse thing. I don't exactly tangle with demons on a regular basis, John always told me to stay away whenever they might turn up. So what little information I do have comes from other Hunters, and they have a tendency to mix the facts just a tad."

I pulled up another old chair and sat down. Needless to say I was beginning to wonder if coming to my brothers was such a good idea after all.

"I think we need to make a little trip to Bobbys." Dean announced. "Maybe he might have an explanation."

"An explanation for what? He knows just as much as we do on the situation. I don't think he'd know why Lucifer would be after our sister." Sam blinked a few times and snickered. "Saying that sounds so weird."

Dean ignored that statement and motioned to Castiel. "In the mean time, why don't you do your little angel juju on her ribcage, just to be safe."

There wasn't time for me to ask what he meant by that because Castiel immediately approached and lied his hand on my chest. The feeling after that, well- It felt as though someone took a butter knife and started pecking away at my insides. It lasted only a second when he pulled away.

"Do I want to know what just happened?" I asked, trying to catch my breath.

"Probably not." Dean answered. "Let's get the hell out of here. We left my baby back in town and that's just... Just _wrong_."

* * *

I was pleasantly surprised, and slightly annoyed, at how obsessed Dean was with his car. I could definitely say I myself was a little enamored with my own vehicle. But can you blame me? It was awesome! But, I didn't approve of how they wanted to handle the driving situation. It was easy for them to say "Hey just ditch your car and ride with us." But when I suggested they ditch theirs, I thought I was going to have my head chopped off. Yeah maybe it would have been safer had I just went with them and left my own baby behind, but no- That wasn't gonna happen.

Finally after refusing to climb out of my car, they decided it was better to just let me have my way and I would follow them to Bobbys. I was slightly confused however when they stuck the angel on me.

I wasn't stupid. I saw Dean and Castiel whispering to each other. No doubts my older brother wanted to have me interrogated so to speak. He wanted to get dirt on me, or maybe find out if I was somehow lying about my identity. And who better than to do the questioning but an angel? Chances were he could tell I if was lying instantly. The last thing I wanted was to turn my only family members against me, so I didn't object when Castiel sat down in the passenger seat.

We started off and for the first hour he didn't speak, he only sat there stiffly, every once in a while trying to, as nonchalantly as possible, take peaks at me. This went on for yet another hour when I finally let out a sigh and said.

"Ok, so get started."

"Excuse me?" He replied.

"I know Dean wanted you to ride with me for one reason or another. And I think it's safe to guess that he wanted you to question me. So, do it. Get whatever information or confirmation you need and report back to them."

He moved his attention to the road ahead.

"I am starting to see the family resemblance." He stated. "Dean and yourself share shockingly similar personalities."

Was that supposed to be an insult? I wasn't quite sure, but somehow I had a feeling it was.

"Sorry if I come off as harsh, but it's been a rough year. Believe me I didn't want to rely on Sam or Dean to help me out, but I didn't have a choice anymore. I figured that if I kept on going by myself then if Lucifer did end up grabbing me, who would know it? No one would."

"I understand."

"So if you want to ask me questions, or try to find out if I'm somehow lying, go ahead. I don't blame you."

He only glared at me with a serious expression, one that couldn't easily be read. After a moment he returned his gazes to the road.

"I don't believe you're lying. Although, I'm very confused on how you have managed to elude me. We have known about the Winchesters since the beginning, along with siblings such as Adam. You..." He paused, yet again looking towards me. "We didn't know existed."

"Who is this _we_?"

"My garrison, as well as every other angel in heaven or on earth. Zachariah especially I would have expected to know about your existence. How have you managed to keep yourself hidden?"

I shrugged at that. "I don't know. I didn't exactly try to hide, really. I just did what John told me, and he said to stay away from Sam and Dean, _and _Adam, and that he would take care of the rest."

"So you knew about your third brother?"

"Yeah, John told me about him. I met him once a few years back. He was a good guy, shame that he was killed."

It seemed awkward and uncaring that I spoke about my brothers death so mildly- But it was hard not to. I didn't know him, I never grew up with any of my siblings. They were, in all retrospects, strangers to me.

"Why were you allowed to meet with him if your Father forbade it?"

"Well, I'm not exactly the most obedient child. Curiosity got the better of me, and since Adam was as normal as they come, I figured it wouldn't hurt. Naturally I left out my lifestyle, and never mentioned Sam or Dean to him."

He nodded slightly, almost as if he were dissecting every word I spoke in his mind. I couldn't tell whether or not he figured I was full of crap or not.

"Tell me about your Mother." He said now. "What was she like?"

"I never knew her. She died shortly after I was born."

"So, who raised you throughout childhood?"

"Random people. A few Hunters had the decency to take me in. After a while I was placed in Foster care and lived on an old farm just south of Indianapolis. They were a nice old couple, I consider them my grandparents, so it wasn't bad."

"And John Winchester kept in contact with you during all of this?"

I felt myself cringe slightly at all the memories I was being forced to drudge up. It's not as if I had a horrible childhood, if you got past the long nights of being taught of monsters and other creatures that could eat me, it was relatively decent- But, talking about my Father was a touchy subject, mainly because he wasn't even close to _being _a Father.

"He would call me every now and then, and stop by the farm to talk. He would make sure that I was doing ok and grilling me on my "studies". He wanted to be sure that I was fully capable of taking care of myself if the time came for it. Other than that-" My voice lowered slightly, the anger was growing more apparent. "He was pretty scarce. Even though he never said it outright, I knew his main concerns were Sam and Dean."

He said nothing more, and for several long awkward minutes we simply drove in silence. My eyes were fixed on the tail lights of Deans impala, as the damp asphalt beneath us provided a smooth yet obnoxious hum beneath our tires. I don't even know when it happened but sometime during the silence I glanced over to the passenger seat to see that Castiel was gone. For a moment I blinked a few times over, wondering if I had hallucinated the entire conversation, but seconds later he reappeared right where he had been.

"Frick." I murmured, startled. "Could give me a little warning that you're gonna do that."

"Sorry." He fidgeted in his seat. "I informed Sam and Dean that you're not lying. You are who you say you are."

"Thanks for that... And?"

"And they are still questionable. They still want to see what Bobby Singer has to say on the matter."

"Why am I not surprised? I guess they're as paranoid as I've heard. Not that I blame them, I can't exactly say I'm not the same way."

"I'm surprised that Bobby never mentioned you." Castiel went on. "Considering the last few months and how... _Grizzly_ it's become- I think it might have been foolish on his part to keep your identity a secret."

"He was doing what John told him to do. Still... I would like to know why exactly John told Bobby about _me_, but not Adam. Doesn't make much sense to me."

"I have no answer to that."

I snickered and rolled my eyes.

"Yeah I didn't expect you to." Sighing deeply, I passed him a quick glance. "So, an angel, huh? That's pretty... Cool... I guess. How'd you get wrapped up in Sam and Deans crap?"

"I was the one to raise Dean from perdition. And, they have helped me as well."

"Helped you? How so?"

He actually showed a small tilt of a smile.

"They've helped me realize that not everything was as it seemed. As a result I suppose you could say I've rebelled. My purpose now is to help them in any way I can, and to stop following orders from my superiors."

That surprised me. Now, I will say that there isn't much I know about celestial beings. I wasn't exactly a bible thumper growing up, but I thought that angels were supposed to be holier than thou? I dunno, maybe I was wrong- If there is going to be an apocalypse and Lucifer was broke free from his cage, then why the hell couldn't there be rebellious angels? I was actually kind of glad of that- Considering he was probably saving my brothers asses on a regular basis.

"Not to nit-pick." I said, changing the subject. "But did Dean really think I wouldn't notice we _weren't _heading to Bobbys?" When I looked at Castiel, he had suddenly gone stiff. "Where are we going?"

I waited for an answer, and he went silent. After fidgeting for a moment he suddenly vanished. Naturally this time, he didn't poof back which made me release a slew of curses that would make a sailor blush. I guess he didn't quite trust me yet either.


	3. Chapter 3

The rest of the drive I was alone, and just as the sun was coming up we pulled to a stop in front of a run down and pretty dumpy looking piece of crap that was supposed to be a house. My first thoughts were how desperately the yard needed mowed, and the bushes were spreading and growing to the point they covered practically everything. Add a few random pieces of garbage, an old bicycle and an obvious creepy vibe, this place was the equivalent of every other haunted house I had ever seen. But, obviously this place wasn't haunted because Sam, Dean and Castiel all three seemed relaxed enough as they headed up the sidewalk.

I followed warily, slightly pissed that not even an entire day had gone by that my oldest brother had already stuck an angel on me for interrogation, and had lied and taken me to some strangers. Still, I kept trying to tell myself that he had every right to be suspicious- Especially considering their situation. Honestly, I was surprised he didn't douse me in holy water and start kicking the crap out of me with other "What kind of creature are you" tests.

When we hit the steps Sam and Dean led the way and I glared at Cas.

"Nice job at dodging my question back there, ass-hat." I spat.

He looked like he wanted to reply, but instead turned and started up the steps. Yet again, I followed.

Dean barely passed a glance at me before reaching up and ringing the door bell. I said nothing either, and merely examined the three men in front of me. Paranoia was starting to flood through me. Yes, maybe they were my brothers, but could it be possible they were leading me into some kind of trap? I knew they were untrusting, but I guess I never figured they would do something that extreme. By the time the door started to open I had begun to inch my way backwards towards the steps.

"Sam, Dean..." A short scruffy dude with a beard said. "Uh, and, Cas? Hi... Um, what are you guys doing here?"

"You don't know?" Dean replied.

"Well, maybe, but-" He stopped, peaking around the three of them and directly at me. "Ah crap. I guess I do. Come on in."

He pulled the door open and we stepped inside. Luckily our host had the decency to fasten his robe tighter.

Inside his house was extremely depressing. It wreaked of booze and reclusiveness. Not to mention it didn't look like he'd cleaned the place in years. Stacked in random corners, or on the floor, or on the furniture, were papers and dusty books, porno magazines and empty liquor bottles. What a sad little man, I thought.

"Chuck," Dean started. "We thought maybe you could explain a little something."

"Uh, sure." He kept nervously gawking at me. "What's that?"

Dean only arched his brows, his expression saying it should have been completely obvious.

"Notice anything out of the ordinary here?" He went on.

"You mean Lara?"

Sam sighed, it sounded almost like relief.

"So, you saw her then? In a vision?"

"Y-yeah. Last night, I was just writing about it when you showed up. Why?"

Normally I would be screaming in a situation such as this, but I kept quiet for the moment and observed.

"You knew about our sister last night and you didn't bother to call us?" Dean did not sound at all happy.

"Well why should I have? It's not exactly front page news, right?" He let out a nervous chuckle. "I mean, it's just your sister, what's so strange about that?"

"Maybe because up until last night I had no idea she even existed?" Sam answered.

"Oh, that's right. I forgot... Oops." Chuck shrugged innocently.

"Oops?" Dean took a few threatening steps closer. "Our long lost sister suddenly pops out of the woodwork and all you have to say is oops? Spill it, what else are you writing about? Anything else we should know?"

"Well- I was just typing out a little bit here and there, nothing really significant. Only that Lara shows up while you're on a job, you're skeptical, as you usually are in these situations- And then your drive here... To talk to me."

"And nothing else? Nothing about Lucifer hunting her down?"

Chuck looked at me, his eyes were wide which only seemed to make the dark circles under them that much more pronounced.

"You, uh- You know about that, huh?"

"A little bit yeah." I answered.

"It's true then?" Sam shook his head. "Is it because of me? Is that why he wants her, to somehow get at me?"

"No." Chuck moved across the room and to his cluttered desk. He clicked around on his keyboard before the printer started up. "He has other motives for wanting Lara."

Everyone silent, we waited for him to go on. When it was clear he wasn't going to offer anymore of an explanation, I spoke.

"Those motives are?"

He shrugged, and tried his best to keep his eyes off of me.

"I don't know. I haven't seen that far yet."

"Awesome." Dean turned to Cas now. "What about you? Do you have any way of finding out why he wants her?"

"It would require returning to heaven, which obviously wouldn't be a very good idea right now. Being here at the prophets home is just as dangerous. Zachariah isn't exactly very pleased with me for obvious reasons." He motioned slightly with his head to the archway leading to the hall. "Dean can I have a word with you?"

I watched them enter the hallway where they began to whisper. I hated whispering, it pissed me off- I hated being left out of conversations, especially when I was nearly one hundred percent certain that conversation was about me. After nearly two minutes Dean shook his head while Cas continued to lecture him, at least that's the way it seemed. Considering the angel never had much as far as facial expressions went it was kind of hard to tell. After another minute Dean turned and glared straight at me and there was a look on his face that confused me. Mainly because it looked like, what I would describe, was guilt. Finally they came back inside.

"Ok. Since you're no help I guess we'll hit the road." Dean said and Chuck hugged a bottle of Jack Daniels to his chest.

"Sorry I couldn't be more help. From now on, if I see anything with her-" He pointed at me. "In it, I'll try to contact you. If Zachariah will let me anyways."

Sam offered a small smile.

"Seeya around, Chuck." He said.

Dean said nothing, neither did Cas, and we left the way we came. When I stopped at my car Dean followed and held his hand on my door to prevent me from opening it.

"Listen." He started. "About the whole interrogation thing. You know I did that for our own safety right?"

"I know."

"It's not like Cas would have smited your ass."

"I think you mean smote."

He nodded, then awkwardly tapped his hand on the roof of my car.

"Right, well we'll start off for Bobbys now-" He started to walk away, but then stopped. "You coming?"

That was obviously an invitation and not a command which I tried my best not to smirk at.

"I'm right behind you."

* * *

I hadn't seen Bobbys place since I was ten years old- It was the only time that John had ever taken me on a road trip. I knew it wasn't for a fun filled family vacation, but only because the Hunter I had been living with previously had inexplicably disappeared. While he searched for her, he was going to ditch me with Bobby. Anyhow, the twelve years that passed after that I wasn't surprised to see the place looked exactly the same- Only, there seemed to be a few more junkers crowding the property.

The rest of my encounters with Bobby relied solely on himself coming to me- Which he did as often as possible. Sometimes it was twice a year, but usually it was phone calls. I appreciated it, it was nice to know that at least I had someone that cared enough to check up on me- Since apparently John didn't give two craps.

When the door opened and Bobby appeared, I felt my heart skip. He looked exactly the same, except for a little gray here and there. Same beard, same trucker hat and flannel shirt, same everything.

I didn't know what to say. It was different speaking to him on the phone every now and then, but seeing him face to face for the first time in years was like opening a door into the past. I could just see him on his visits, he would make it a point to come at Christmas time and always he would bring me some kind of gift. Which, if you knew the man, you would know that wasn't exactly his personality. I dunno, I liked to think that maybe there was a part of him that looked at me as his daughter. It was a nice thought at least.

"I see you made it out ok." He said, allowing us entrance. Immediately I was surprised when he grabbed me and gave me a hug tight enough to crush my ribs.

"Bobby." Was Deans greeting.

"Boys... Cas." Bobby released me finally, and I could breathe again. "I guess I have some explaining to do, huh?"

"Yeah-" Sam didn't seem to be nearly as grumpy as Dean. "That might be nice."

"Well, comon in." We followed him to the kitchen, where he offered everyone a beer. Cas was the only one to decline. "Sam I suppose you're the one that has all the questions."

"Dean filled me in as much as he could." Sam sat down at the kitchen table, which looked microscopic in comparison to him. "He said that Dad told him about Lara, what, ten years ago?"

"Sounds about right." Bobby leaned against the counter. "Around the time that a friend of ours went missing. Lara had been staying with her. After that your Dad figured that it was a good idea to tell Dean about her- Just in case he had to take her in."

"Take me in?" Of course I was insulted. "What am I stray cat?"

Bobby rolled his eyes at that. "Now ya see. John didn't know about your sister until she was nearly a year old. It was right before her Mother died that she got a hold of him. She told him that he had a daughter, and to make a long story short- When John got there Lara's Mother had already died."

"And let me guess." Dean went on. "Dad panicked and threw her with the first Hunter he came across on the road?"

"Basically." Bobby certainly didn't sugarcoat anything. Not that this conversation hurt me much, I had heard it a dozen times. "She wasn't even out of diapers, and he had you boys. I guess he figured it would be best to leave her with someone else that could take better care of her."

I loved how they were talking about this like I wasn't even there. I might as well have been invisible.

"So, did he ever-" Sam shrugged, directing his question at me. "Did he ever talk about us?"

"Only that I was to stay away from you. That it was too dangerous to risk meeting you. I was pretty much isolated and kept tucked away for my entire childhood."

"Why?" Sams sad puppy face contorted into confusion. "I mean, I know that he kept Adam a secret, but it seems like there's more to this story when it comes to you."

"Yeah, considering _Lucifer _is after her and all." Dean retorted.

"Lucifer?" Bobby pushed away from the counter. "What are you talkin about?"

"Apparently Lucifer has been trying to find the girl." Castiel said. "Although, we aren't certain of his motives."

"Chuck confirmed it." Dean went on. "We swung by his place on the drive here- He saw it in one of his visions."

"But that don't make sense. There's no reason that I can think of why he'd want her. Unless he was thinkin' maybe she could be his vessel instead of Sam."

"Highly improbable." Cas shook his head. "Lucifer is insistent that Sam is his true vessel. He wouldn't settle for anyone else- Even though the one he has now is disintegrating."

Bobby gave me a sympathetic stare. "I guess I get now why you wanted to track down the boys."

I only shrugged in response before Dean stomped towards the door. "I'm gonna take a walk."

After hearing the door slam in his exit, Sam rose both brows at me and offered a smile.

"I think I'll hit the books. See if there's something, anything, that might give us an explanation." Bobby passed me on his way out of the kitchen and patted my shoulder. "I doubt I'll find anything though."

I doubted that too, but wasn't going to argue. Bobby was stubborn as a mule, especially when it concerned something he might have cared about. Even though there wouldn't be any reason written in any of his old books, he would read them until his eyes fell out. Nice? Yes, and unfortunately pretty pointless too.

After a few uncomfortable seconds I awkwardly sat at the table across from Sam and thumped my half empty beer bottle until the silence was deafening.

"I just want you to know-" Sam said. "That if I would have known you existed..."

"I know." I interrupted.

"It's the same with Adam. We didn't know about him either, and well-" He let out a sigh, his eyes shifting to the window beside the table. I noticed what his attention was focused on. Dean. He was pacing back and forth in front of his impala. "You see, Adam was killed, and I think Dean blames himself for that. And, I think that he feels guilty about you too. Especially since the situation is a little different. He actually knew about you, and now that he found out you're being chased by Lucifer..."

"It's not like he could have stopped that." Yet again, I cut him off.

"Still- If you knew Dean at all you would see he likes to blame himself for a lot of crap, even if it's not his fault. And I guess he just feels guilty that his little sister has been going through all of this on her own."

Now we were both staring at Dean, he had finally stopped pacing and leaned against the hood of the car staring aimlessly out at nothing. Before long Cas appeared beside him and they resumed with the private whisperings.

"What's up with your angel anyways?" I changed the subject from an uncomfortable sibling moment.

"Cas?" Sam chuckled. "What do you mean?"

"Call me crazy but I highly doubt there are angels willing to rebel left and right. Is there a special situation when it concerns him?"

"I dunno- Maybe. I honestly think Dean and I are the first real friends the poor guy's had." He took a sip of beer. "When we first met him he was kind of a jerk, and after a while he loosened up. Now, he makes his own decisions and has gotten us out of quite a few scrapes."

"Guess you guys are lucky then, huh?"

Sam snickered, and it was definitely sarcastic. "Yeah, as lucky as two guys can get, one that went to hell, the other who let Lucifer out of his cage and brought on the apocalypse."

"Well aren't we Mr Optimistic?" I stood from the table. "Bathroom break."

He said nothing and I started up the stairs, it took me a minute or so to remember where the bathroom was.

Even though Bobby was an excelled Hunter, and his place was actually pretty safe- The run down and dusty walls always creeped me out. The dude definitely needed to hire a housekeeper.

The bathroom too left much to be desired, there were leftover whiskers sprinkled across the sink next to his beard trimmer, and a stack of occult books was next to the toilet. It smelled pretty much like any single guys bathroom, mixed with old spice. After doing my business I stood in front of the mirror and let out a sigh. I looked like hell, exhausted and just plain miserable. But, now that I actually sat and examined myself, I was surprised at how much of Sam and Dean were in my facial features. I had Deans hair color and fuller lips, but Sams eyes and pensive and soul searching expression. The rest of me I could only assume came from my Mother. Since I had no idea what she looked like, I didn't even have a frickin picture, it would only be a guess. But, since it was apparent we were siblings, maybe that's why Dean wasn't quick to conclude that I was lying when I showed up.

Now what I wanted to know was what was going to happen now? Somehow I had a feeling that Sam and Dean wouldn't exactly be willing to let me tag along with them, and I certainly didn't want to go back to being on my own. Running from one dump motel to the next, living on fast food and gas station burritos, getting barely three hours of sleep a night- Yeah, it's not exactly the most thrilling life. I didn't want to go back to that, no way. And all of my contacts weren't answering their phones anymore, which led me to believe that they were dead. Basically, Sam and Dean were my last shot, and if they tried to ditch me, well... I was pretty much screwed.

But, I told myself that if that was the case, if they didn't want their annoying little sister tagging along, then I would just have to deal with it. Yeah, I hated being on my own, having to deal with monsters and crap that would scare the piss out of a normal person, but I could do it if I had to. I hadn't died yet. Lucifer hadn't found me yet, so I would just keep going until one or the other did happen.

When I returned downstairs Dean had finally came back inside- Still he didn't look much happier about the situation. I wondered if what Sam said was true. Did he really feel guilty about me being on my own? If he did there really wasn't any need. It's not like he could have swooped in and rescued me, he had his own crap to deal with. The last thing he needed was having a little sister burdening him with her problems, although- That's exactly what I was doing right now. But you always hear, at least on television, that family is supposed to be there for each other. Maybe in normal situations, with normal families, that might be true. But we were far from normal. We weren't exactly the Brady Bunch, our troubles didn't consist of would be prom dates and basketball games, it was much more deadly. So, no- I definitely didn't fault Dean for a second for not coming and "rescuing" me along time ago.

Basically, guilt just wasn't necessary.

I seemed to have interrupted a rather heated discussion between Dean and Sam. What they were arguing about, I had no clue- But they certainly shut up pretty damn quickly when I stepped into the room. Duh, it was about me... _Again_. Maybe they were arguing on what the hell to do with me. Maybe they wanted to leave me with Bobby? Maybe they wanted to ship me to some remote deserted island in hopes that no demons, or Lucifer, could find me. Kind of annoying actually, considering that I wasn't a five year-old and not exactly a newbie when it came to Hunting. I could help them. It couldn't hurt to have an extra pair of eyes and an extra gun whenever they were in a tight spot. Hell, the night before should have been proof enough that I wasn't a complete idiot. No, maybe I didn't exactly fight in hand to hand combat with the demons, but I helped get them out of there. That was only the beginning to the things I could do. I knew just as much as they did, who knows, maybe even more.

"What's up?" I asked, trying not to sound like I was on to their scheming.

"Nothing-" Dean barely passed a glance. "We're just trying to decide what to do next."

"About what? Maybe I can help?"

"Yeah, _Dean_. Maybe our _sister _can help." Sam had his arms crossed over his chest, his face wasn't that of a sad puppy anymore, but a snarling pit-bull.

Apparently big brother wasn't accustomed to being called out like that. Sam pretty much just told me, without voicing the actual words, that they had been arguing about me.

"We, we've been trying to figure out a way to take down Lucifer." Dean finally spoke. "But we've hit a dead-end, and we're not the type to just sit around with our thumbs up our asses waiting to be attacked."

"And?" Now I crossed my arms. Poor Dean was sandwiched in between two siblings who were clearly pissed off at him.

"We want to keep moving, and there's this thing in Nebraska. A job."

"But, what Dean _isn't _saying is that he wants you to come and help us out." Sam finished, receiving a very disapproved "you asshole" stare from Dean in return.

"Right." Dean didn't take his eyes off Sam as he spoke. "So you in?"

"Why not. What's the gist of the job?" I moved back to the kitchen table where a laptop sat open. Sam sat down in front of it.

He clicked around for a moment before opening the local paper for a town called Kenesaw.

"Small town, less than one thousand people. Nothing really out of the ordinary, except recently a man was found dead on the side of the road. His eyes were completely pecked out and other than that, there was no other apparent sign of death." Sam started. "But the strange part, aside from his eyes being pecked out, was that he carved into his chest with his own fingernails the words, _The crows are after me._"

It was only then that I noticed their little feathered friend wasn't anywhere around. Castiel that is, he was gone. For the moment I didn't question them.

"And then three days later." Sam continued. "An eighteen year old girl was found wandering through an empty cornfield, and her eyes had been pecked out too. She kept repeating the same words the dead guy had carved into his chest."

"The crows are after me." Dean stated, as if we had forgotten.

"Anything else?" I asked as I glanced over Sams shoulder and at his laptop screen.

"We won't know anything else until we get there and start questioning people. But, if you ask me, it sounds maybe like we might be dealing with a witch." Sam answered.

"That's what I was thinking." Dean glanced at the article in the newspaper. "Not exactly my favorite monster to gank, but it'll do."

"When do we leave?" I asked, glancing from Sam to Dean.

"About that." Dean gave me what I assumed was the older brother death stare. "I think it might be best if you left your car here and just rode with us."

"Why?"

"Because it's safer that way."

Don't argue... I told myself that a good ten times over. I needed to just be thankful they were even including me at all.

"Fine. I'm sure Bobby wouldn't mind if I kept it parked here for a while."

He obviously expected a fight about that, and his cinched mouth proved he was ready to fight to the death on this matter.

"I'll go get my stuff." I gave a sarcastic smile to both of them and walked out the door


	4. Chapter 4

**(I just want to say thanks to all the awesome reviews, you guys rock my socks off!)**

* * *

I sifted through my backpack, looking for the proper identification to flash just in case a suspicious cop decided to question me. When I finally found it and pulled it out, Dean looked back at me from the drivers seat.

"You stay here." He commanded.

"Uh... What?" I garbled.

"You heard me. Stay here. Sam and I can handle this."

They were both dressed in cheap suits, a spitting image of the FBI, or what ever sort of law enforcement they were mimicking today. Sam, after noticing my expression, brushed his hair from his eyes and let out a sigh. I don't know why I expected him to defend me, but I was a little crushed when he only sat there.

"Ok, so you wanted me to ride along and, as you said, _help_- But now that we're here you're leaving me in the car?" Dean and Sam exchanged looks and I rolled my eyes. "Well... Don't forget to crack the fucking windows, assholes. You don't want Cas and I smothering in here."

"It's impossible for me to smother from an closed window." Cas said dully, his blue eyes fixed on the pedestrians walking the streets.

It would have been nice if someone, even if it was the angel with no sense of humor, would friggen back me up just once.

If my eyes could have spat fire they probably would have by now as I glared at Sam and Dean. They slammed the car doors in unison and headed up the steps to the coroners office.

I waited exactly five minutes before I grabbed the necessary badges and the ugly blue jacket I always wore when impersonating a fed- Afterwards I climbed out of the car and jogged onto the sidewalk. I didn't make it ten feet before Cas poofed in front of me.

"Where are you going?"

"To do my job."

I moved past him and started walking again, he followed.

"Dean made it perfectly clear that you're to stay in the car." He said.

"News flash, sweetie- But Dean can't exactly tell me what to do. Now, either you can come with me and back me up, or you can stay behind and explain to Dean why I'm gone. What's it gonna be?"

His eyes shifted back and forth so quickly I thought his head would explode. Apparently he didn't like either of those options but having to stay behind and tell Dean why his sister had disappeared seemed to be the more frightening choice. So I wasn't surprised when he continued to follow me.

"Where are we going?" He asked now.

"To the first crime scene. It's not far from here, just a few blocks."

"And what is our mission?"

"To see if there's anything strange left behind that someone might have missed. If there's nothing there, then I'm sending you to the corn field." Apparently he didn't understand that Twilight zone reference. "Since that's where the second victim was found."

"I understand. Do you believe that we aren't dealing with a witch?"

"I don't know. We just got here."

I stopped on the street corner and noticed about a block away the bright yellow crime scene tape. It sectioned off a ditch and one lone police car was guarding it.

"You'd think there would be more cops swarming around the area." I stated. "But this is a small town, so."

Cas said nothing and when we approached the scene, the middle aged cop waddled out of his car. It was a surprise to me that this man, who was the stereotypical cop with doughnut in hand, merely waved us past with no questions after I flashed my badge.

Naturally the body had long ago been taken away, and there wasn't much on the ground except some empty coke bottles and other random pieces of litter. They didn't fit in with the crime scene, I knew that much already. Whatever I was going to be looking for was bound to be something freaky. Such as, a hex bag, if we were dealing with a witch that is.

"Take a look around the area. Let me know if you find anything strange." I said.

Cas nodded and walked on ahead, inspecting the ground carefully. I approached the cop who had returned to his car and peaked my head inside his open window.

"Do you think I could ask you a few questions?"

"Shoot." The man said.

"Was there anything found on or near the body?"

"Ya mean other than the message he scratched into his chest?"

"Yeah, maybe an object of some sort?"

"Not that I can recall. But he lied there in the ditch for practically three days before someone noticed him."

Ugh, this was why I hated small towns. Not enough people to notice if a certain man or woman had gone missing.

"What was the vics name?" I asked now.

"Bradley Franklin. Lived on the corner of Pine and Elm."

"Was he married, did he have a family?"

"No, and no."

I pretended to jot this down in a small notebook I held. Luckily for me I had an almost photographic memory. Had the cop looked he would have noticed it was a crude doodle of a pony with horns.

"Alright. Thanks for the info, Officer. Have a nice day." I smiled a very fake smile that I had mastered over the years and returned to where Cas was kneeling.

"Find anything?"

"Sulfur." He answered.

"Sulfur?" I knelt down, and sure enough there were patches of sulfur in between grass blades. "Interesting. Not a witch then."

"That was my first assumption, yes. Unless it was a demon summoned by a witch."

"That usually ends badly for the witch though." I stood and took a good look around. "At least that's what I've always noticed. Demons don't exactly like being ordered around. I've found a lot of shredded witches in the past."

My pocket began to vibrate and I pulled my phone out long enough to see it was Dean calling. I quickly rejected the call. Ten seconds later Cas' trench-coat began to jingle. He removed his phone and after noticing the caller, his eyes widened slightly.

"It's Dean. Should I answer?"

"Go for it. Have fun explaining where we are."

He contemplated with rejecting, hovering his thumb over the decline button before finally pushing accept.

"Dean?"

I could hear Dean cursing even from where I was standing.

"She's with me." Cas went on. "Yes, I understand." His eyes shifted to me, then he held out the phone. "He wants to talk to you."

"Oh, ok." I grabbed the phone and quickly slammed it shut, then handed it back to him. "Now let's go talk to the second victim."

* * *

Thank god this town is small, is all I had to say- The second victim had been released from the hospital and was now at home with her family- Which wasn't but a few more blocks from where the first victim was found. After flashing my badge to the sniveling woman that answered the door, I brandished yet again my mastered phony smile and she allowed Cas and I inside.

"She's... She hasn't really said much." The woman said as she led us down a hallway. "And she barely eats or sleeps. She's convinced that the crows are going to come back for her."

"I'm so sorry for what's happened, Ma'am. But if she, or you, could give us any answers we might be able to get to the bottom of this." I replied. "What exactly happened?"

"We've told all of this to the police already." She snorted into a used tissue.

"I realize that, but there are a few more questions I need to ask. Bare with me, I know they might sound strange." We sat down on an obnoxious flowered sofa, while she sat in a rocking chair across from us. "Did you happen to notice anything strange during the days before your daughter was hurt?"

"Strange? What kind of strange?"

"Anything. Any strange noises, or smells?"

She thought for a moment and shook her head. "No, I didn't notice anything, but Jenny... She kept saying there was a black crow sitting outside her bedroom window. That it would constantly peck on the glass like it was trying to get in. I never saw it of course, but she was terrified of the thing."

She excused herself to grab a fresh box of tissues, so I quickly nudged Cas.

"Look around the house and see if you can find any hex bags. Even though I'm pretty sure it's not a witch we're dealing with, it won't hurt to check."

He didn't budge from the couch, which only resulted in a scowl from myself.

"Well? Are you going to look?"

"I- I'm not supposed to leave you alone. Dean was quite clear on that fact."

"We're not in the middle of a demon infested war-zone, I think I'll be ok while you're in the next room." The woman returned with her box of tissues and sat again. "Go." I whispered.

He stood to leave and the woman asked.

"Where is your Partner going?"

"To look for hex bags." Cas answered quickly, as if it was completely obvious.

"Excuse me?" The woman momentarily dropped her tissue.

"He needs to use the restroom, do you mind?" I intervened, stopping Cas with his mouth hanging open.

She looked confused, and rightfully so, but nodded. "It's up the stairs, first door on the left."

Once he left the room I tried not to curse. Leave it to the angel to almost blow our cover. I made sure to keep her attention on me, because out of the corner of my eye I could see Cas searching through cabinets and under pieces of furniture.

The girls Mother didn't have any explanation for what happened to her daughter, and after she led me upstairs to her bedroom, Cas suddenly appeared beside me. Thank god the woman had her back to us.

"I found nothing. No hex bags, no other signs of witch-craft." He whispered.

Well, it seems that I was pretty much just ignoring everything John had told me growing up. This time around I wasn't avoiding a demon case, I was jumping into it full force. Normally if I found out there were demons within a one hundred mile radius I would be out the door and fleeing in the opposite direction. This time, I couldn't do that. I had something to prove. I wanted my brothers to realize that I wasn't useless and that I could actually do these jobs myself.

Inside the girls bedroom it was completely dark, but for a small bedside lamp which was flicked on. The girl, who was a petite blonde was lying on the bed with her head propped on several pillows. There were bandages wound around her head and face, successfully covering the gaping holes where her eyes used to be.

"Jenny, honey." Her Mother said. "There are some police officers here to talk to you."

Jenny was clearly awake, because I could see the muscles flinch in her jaw as response.

"Do you think we could talk to her alone, please?" I asked.

The woman nodded, and slowly made her way back to the hallway. Once the door was closed Cas went straight to searching her room while I moved beside the bed.

"Jenny. I have a few questions, do you think you can answer them?" She said nothing, the room was silent but for Cas, who was successfully ripping apart a throw pillow and spilling its contents onto the floor. "I need you to tell me what you saw before you were attacked."

Cas stopped long enough to look at me and shake his head. I wasn't sure why he was still searching, it was growing more and more apparent that there was no way a witch was responsible for this.

"Crow." The girl suddenly said. "It was the crow."

"A crow? So do you mean an actual bird?"

She shook her head. "It spoke... He wanted a sacrifice..."

"A sacrifice?" Cas was interested now. "What sort of a sacrifice?"

The girl began to mumble incoherently, ignoring any other questions we asked after that. It didn't matter, I had a pretty good idea what was going on already. After all, John was so freaked out by demons and ordering me to stay away from them, I had taken a sort of twisted interest in learning as much as I could about them. Of course, John didn't know that. Yeah, I might have stayed away from them, but that didn't stop me from reading every occult book I could find.

"Let's go." I said and started for the door, Cas stopped me by grabbing my wrist.

"I could help this girl." He whispered. "I could ease her suffering- Heal her."

"Really?" I don't know why that thought never crossed my mind. He was an angel, of course he could do something like that. I glanced passed him and at the girl, who was still mumbling. "I think though- It might be a better idea to wait to do that when we're leaving here. This town is small. If she was miraculously healed then naturally word would spread, it could fall back on us."

"You might be right." He released my wrist and lowered his eyes to the floor. "I will return here before we leave."

I gave him half a smile, knowing he was disappointed. He obviously had a very kind heart.

We descended the stairs and said goodbye to the girls Mother, telling her we could do everything within our capabilities to help- Then stepped back out onto the front porch. No, I wasn't surprised in the slightest to see Sam and Dean waiting by the curb beside their car.

Smirking, I approached and said.

"So, guys- Find anything interesting at the coroner?"

Dean had loosened his tie and removed his jacket, which was slung over his shoulder. He held that pissed look again.

"What the hell?" He asked.

"_What _Dean meant to ask." Sam nervously spat. "Is what did you find out from the girls family?"

"No, _no_- What I was going to ask is what the hell you're doing running off on your own." Dean pushed away from the car and stomped up to us. "Cas- You were supposed to make sure she stayed in the car, man- What the hell?"

"Don't blame him." I snapped. "I'm not a dog you can order around. You said you wanted my help on this job, so that's what I was trying to do. Now, do you want to know what I found out? Yes or no? Because if not, you can go inside and do everything Cas and I just did and come out with the same results." I paused, staring from brother to brother. "Well?"

"What did you find out, Lara?" Sam asked, as Dean continued to sulk.

"That it's not a witch we're dealing with here. I need access to a computer, even though I'm almost one hundred percent certain I know what did this."

"There's a motel just on the edge of town." Dean announced. "We can talk about it there."


	5. Chapter 5

I was silent as I clicked around on Sams laptop, every once in a while stopping to listen to what my brothers and Cas were talking about.

"The body had already been cremated." Sam sighed. "So, we couldn't check for EMF, or search for anything strange."

"Not that it matters." Dean mumbled with his mouth full of cheese-burger. "According to Cas, there was sulfur at the kill-site. Gotta say, I'm halfway relieved it's a demon and not a witch."

"Still, I think that it wouldn't hurt to check out the area where the girl was found. Just to be safe."

I shoved a french fry in my mouth and continued reading, finally finding what it was I was looking for.

"Got it." I said, and each man approached the table where I sat. "Anyone of you ever heard of the demon called Malphas?"

Sam and Dean shook their head, but Cas seemed bewildered.

"I have." He said.

"Nasty little guy." I went on. "Disguises himself as a crow, likes to fuck around with peoples heads, demands sacrifices. Afterwards he kills the people he's been toying with."

"If it truly is Malphas, then I would suggest allowing me to handle him." Cas went on. "He is very dangerous."

"Can't be anymore dangerous than any other demon bitch we've killed." Dean's confidence was commendable, but he was drastically mistaken this time.

"Actually-" I said. "Not to burst your bubble, bro- But Malphas isn't just this little rinky dink demon you can slash with your magic knife. He's considered the Prince of Hell."

Instantly I could see Sam and Dean go stiff, which of course roused my curiosity.

"Guys?" I said. "Anything you wanna tell me?"

"Does he have anything to do with Crowley?" Dean ignored me and directed his question to Cas.

"If Crowley is the _King _of hell, Dean- Then what do you think the Prince would be?" Did I detect a hint of sarcasm in Cas' voice?

"Crowley's son?" Sam answered. "How many little demons spawns does he have?"

"Who cares." Dean was no longer interested in stuffing his face. "If we can gank this mother, then let's do it."

"And piss off the King of Hell even more than he already is?" Sam snorted out a laugh. "Great idea, Dean."

"There is a reason why Malphas would have done this." Cas went on. "He never would have left bodies around to be found unless he wanted them to be."

"A message maybe?" Dean asked.

"Or maybe he was trying to get someones attention." Sam shook his head. "Someone like Lucifers vessel, maybe?"

"You're just grasping at straws now." I said. "If you really want to know then why don't you summon Malphas here, get him stuck in a devils trap and ask him."

Sometimes I think they forgot I was even there at all because they would give me this look that said "When did you get here?"

"What?" Dean asked.

"Did I just lapse into Chinese? You heard me. If you don't want Cas to smite his demon ass, and you want to know why Crowleys son is here, then put on your big boy pants and summon him here."

"You're crazy you know that?" Dean smiled after that comment. "I like your way of thinking."

"God- Now there's two of them." Sam mumbled, successfully preforming a perfect face-palm.

"I'll get the spray paint." Dean stomped out of the motel room and started digging through the trunk of his car.

"Are you certain this is wise?" Cas asked no one in particular.

"No, of course not." Sam answered. "But, you're here, so what's the worst that could happen?"

* * *

Everything was done, the devils trap had been spray painted onto the floor- Something I was sure the motel staff would not appreciate, and the ingredients were mixed into a dented metal bowl. Dean recited the chant, and all that remained was him dropping the lit match into the bowl, which he hesitated doing. He seemed to inspect the three of us, waiting for some kind of objection. But he wasn't going to get one- At least not from myself.

I had spent my entire life wondering what the hubbub was about demons and why John was so insistent I stay away from them. Yes, I know, they're dangerous evil creatures blah blah, but I had never actually encountered one. Maybe it was stupid of me, but I was curious to see one- To possibly interact with one. There had to have been a reason why my Father was so adamant about keeping me away from demons. And not just for the obvious that they were dangerous. Somehow I had a feeling there was more to it than that.

"Ready?" Dean asked.

Sam nodded, with his knife in one hand and a flask of holy water in the next. Castiel stood stiff and blank faced, seemingly uncaring to what was happening, although that could have been a facade.

"Here goes nothin." Dean said and let the match drop.

This was the first time I had ever participated in summoning a demon, and wasn't prepared for the tiny fireball that burst up from the bowl. I jumped slightly and stood behind Sam with my shot-gun at the ready.

Dean moved away from the smoking bowl and joined us just outside the devils trap, he had his own shot gun pulled.

We waited, for what felt like minutes on end, even though it was probably mere seconds. I don't know what I expected, a crack of thunder, a streak of lightning, frogs raining from the sky- But there was nothing but silence.

"I guess... There was always a possibility it _wasn't _Malphas." I said with a shrug, which caused Dean to stare at me from over his shoulder. "Everyone makes mistakes."

"Not this time, darling." A gruff voice suddenly said.

Everybody returned their attention to the devils trap, where a man that looked no older than twenty stood. He was dressed in black, his dark hair was slicked back away from his face, and for an instant his eyes gleamed red.

"It's about bloody time." He said, his accent thick and blatantly english. "I was wondering how many bodies I would have to leave in order to get your attention."

Sam and Dean were ready to pounce, but the demon only stood there perfectly calm.

"Shall we then? I'm sure you have a myriad of questions for me."

"So you did this on purpose?" Dean finally spoke. "Why?"

"It wasn't exactly my finest hour leaving those victims as bait for you quivering gits, but it was necessary. We needed to talk, and the fact that I actually did this shows that I mean business. I wouldn't exactly put my life in danger for something piddly and insignificant." He smirked, and it sent chills down my spine. "And yes, I know who you are. Everyone knows Sam Winchester."

Sams shoulders tensed and I noticed him gripping the hilt of his knife tightly.

"What do you want?" He asked.

"To strike a bargain, something that I'm sure you will be interested in."

"Does this bargain include killing you?" Dean said. "Cause if it does I'm all for it."

"Funny." Malphas took as many steps forward as he could until he reached the edge of the trap. "A little birdie told me that my dear old Papa screwed you over. Really, lads- You should know better than to trust the King of Hell. He didn't gain that title by being a little lamb."

"Get on with it. This conversation is boring me." Dean rose his gun and aimed.

"Alright, alright- Wow, you really are impatient aren't you?" Malphas grinned. "Here's the deal. My Daddy has put a hit out on me, naturally, I want to avoid death. You take care of him, and I'll help you kill Lucifer."

"You're lying." Castiel stated as a matter of fact.

"Angels, always so suspicious." Malphas tsked. "I had a feeling you would be untrustworthy little scamps- And, I had a feeling that this meeting would go sour, so I had a backup plan to fall onto."

He went silent, and seconds passed before the entire motel began to shake. Plaster started stripping off the walls falling in huge chunks, the lights flickered and rattled, and before long a large crack formed on the floor and raced straight through the devils trap.

"Before you panic." Malphas raised his hand halting Sam in mid step. "I'm not going to hurt you. This is a show of good faith here, ladies- I'm proving to you that I'm a man of my word. I alerted a few friends of mine that more then likely you would be coming after me, and in the event of my disappearance they were to track me down and give me a little hand. Now, since I seem to have your attention-" He glanced at Castiel who was contemplating making a move. "I wouldn't, Castiel. The second you make a move against me I'll snap one of their necks."

Cas immediately stopped.

"Ok!" Dean lowered his gun slightly. "How exactly do you expect us to stop Crowley? Since he lied to us about the colt, he hasn't popped back up."

"Of course he hasn't. He's probably still laughing about that. Did you really think you could kill Lucifer with a gun?" He was the only one that found that amusing. "Castiel especially, you should have known better. You're getting rusty. So I'll get to the gist. You help me, I help you. Sound simple enough, right? I have ears and eyes everywhere- I can keep track of Lucifer, find out what he's up to and when, _or_ where. While I might not be able to help you kill him right now, eventually that will happen."

"Give us one good reason why we should believe anything you say?" Sam asked.

"Considering I haven't torn your bleeding hearts out of your chests should show that, unlike my Father, I don't lie." He shrugged. "Decline if you wish, but it would be a costly decision on your part. Offers like this don't come around everyday. How many more options will you get to have a spy in Lucifer's trusted circle?"

I watched Dean and Sams stances. While Dean looked completely defiant, Sam did not.

"You don't have to make the choice now." Malphas went on. "You have twenty four hours. Ta, ladies and gents."

And in an instant the entire incident that lasted less than ten minutes was over. For a moment I wondered if it even happened at all- That is, until I looked down at the busted plaster on the floor.

"Next time don't listen to me." I said. "If I ever mention summoning a demon again, slap me."

"It doesn't matter." Sam said. "Even if you hadn't of suggested it. Dean probably would have."

"Well if the bastard hadn't of been setting us up, the plan would have worked." Dean lied his gun down on the table. "Now, what do we do? Twenty four hours, that isn't much time to make a decision."

"You aren't seriously contemplating accepting his offer?" Cas asked.

"No, of course not. But, I also don't want to piss the guy off."

"Then let me find him." Cas went on. "Let me take care of him, before it gets out of hand."

"Wait." Sam had a look about him, one that I had a feeling was going to piss everyone off. "Maybe we should consider this. I mean, if he's telling the truth, we could have an advantage, finally."

"You've got to be kidding me." Deans eyes were wide. "Haven't you learned your lesson yet? We don't tangle with demons, Sam. What happened with Ruby should be proof enough that they can't be trusted!"

"This is different. You know just as well as I do that when it comes to Lucifer we need all the help we can get. The colt didn't work, and unless you have some other way to take down the devil, Malphas might be the only help we're gonna get."

"No." Dean shook his head and stomped over to the table, where his bottle of beer sat. After chugging more than half he looked to Cas. "Go find him and kill him. We aren't going through this crap again."

Cas immediately poofed away.

"Dean, try to think outside the box a little. We're running out of options." Sam said.

"I don't care! We aren't going to make any deals with demons. End of discussion."

Dean grabbed his car keys and stormed out of the room, leaving Sam and I alone.

"Sorry about that, Lara." Sam said, giving a fake smile. "You better get used to our arguing- It happens almost everyday now."

"I'm sorry I ever said anything about summoning the demon here." I sighed and sat back at the table, which was now covered in busted ceiling tiles. "Would you really want to make a deal with that guy?"

"Want to? No. Need to, maybe." He sat across from me. "Dean, as you've noticed I'm sure, is stubborn- And sometimes it gets in the way of rational thinking. It might be incredibly stupid to trust a demon, but I dunno- Personally I'm willing to take the risk."

"Why?"

He let out a huff of air. "Because it's my fault. I was stupid and made a horrible, _horrible _mistake. And because of that the entire world is going to pay for it. I want to fix it. Even if it means losing my soul to some demon."

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard." He was taken aback by my statement.

"Why is that stupid?"

"Because, when someone gets it into their head that they can save the world by sacrificing themselves, it always fucks up somehow and makes matters worse. That person ends up dead, and the world is still screwed. So, instead of walking yourself off the plank, why don't you figure out a real and logical way of fixing your mistake?"

His eyes fell away from mine, and just as always he looked so sullen and depressed.

"There isn't a logical way."

"There's always a way, it just might take a while of searching to find it."

Sam started flicking pieces of broken tile and plaster onto the floor. I could tell he wanted to change the subject, or maybe he was uncomfortable with me- Either way, it was definitely awkward.

"So." Now he tapped his finger on the tabletop. "Do you have a middle name?"

"A middle name?" I snorted out a laugh. "Is that the best question you could think of?"

"Yeah, sorry." He laughed too, finally- And it sounded sincere. "But, what do you say to a sister you never knew you had?"

"Nuriel." I said. "My middle name is Nuriel, don't judge me."

"Nuriel? Lara Nuriel? That's... Well that's pretty damn bad. Your Mom must have hated you."

"I have no idea why she chose that god awful name."

"I know you said that Dad wasn't around much when you were growing up." Yet again he changed the subject. "But, what was it like when he was?"

"What was it like when he was with you?" Deflecting his question by shoving it back at him, yeah, good tactics.

"Uh, well. I grew up feeling like I barely knew him. Dean and I were left alone most of the time, so Dean pretty much raised me by himself."

"Hm. Guess he wasn't nominated for Daddy of the year award, was he?"

He shook his head at that. "Not exactly. Thank god for Bobby though, huh?"

"Yeah. Listen, Sam." I leaned forward, resting my elbows on the table. "I just want you to know that after this whole Lucifer bullshit is over and done with- If you and Dean want me out of your hair, then I'll be gone. You won't have to deal with me anymore."

"What? No, that's not what we want, Lara. I know it might seem weird, but we're actually glad you're here. We don't have a lot of family members, in fact- We have no family, except for Bobby. But yeah, you should stick around."

It would have been nice had he actually meant that- But from what I had heard, Sam and Dean were a two package deal. Which meant that they didn't have any use for anyone else. I was slightly surprised that they had Castiel as a friend, considering everything I had learned about them. But, I guess there was always a chance I could have been wrong.


	6. Chapter 6

At a quick glance I noticed it was well past 2 a.m. Dean had returned a little after midnight and not entirely sober, and after fumbling around and throwing one shoe across the room, he fell onto his bed and passed out. Sam was already asleep by then, so he didn't hear the ruckus- And I wasn't even sure if Dean had noticed me sitting at the table as he mumbled incoherent drunken blatherings to himself.

But now, there I sat, in almost complete darkness, if you ignore the lit up laptop in front of me. Everything was silent, but for the occasional sleep filled grunt coming from one of the boys. I clicked around on the laptop, reading over information on the demon Malphas, and also trying to find some sort of details about the supposed King of Hell. Was it just me, or did Crowely _not _sound like a demons name?

When I heard fluttering and suddenly Castiel appeared on the chair across from me I nearly peed my pants.

"God..." I tried to catch my breath. "You did it again. We need to tie a frickin bell around your neck or something."

"Sorry." He eyed me for a moment before focusing on my brothers.

"So how'd it go? Did you curse Malphas back to eternal damnation?"

"No. I was unable to track him down. He must be hidden behind Enochian sigils."

My eyes rose from the laptop screen. "Damn. Well, I'm sure this isn't going to be pleasant is it?"

"If Malphas is foolish enough to return after twenty four hours, then I could kill him." Was his monotone reply.

Sure, that might work- Unless Malphas did what he said he would do and snap our necks before Cas could actually get his hands on him.

"It's late." Cas said. "Why are you not sleeping?"

"I don't sleep very often, it's kind of difficult."

"Because Lucifer is chasing you?"

"That certainly doesn't help." I laughed. "But, even before I knew about that- I still had issues. I've somehow managed to get maybe three hours every night since I was a teenager. I don't know how I'm not dead."

He tilted his head again, much like he usually did when he seemed to be deep in thought.

"Interesting. Although, Dean tends to miss nearly as much."

Both our eyes locked onto my oldest brother, whos legs were halfway hanging off the edge of the bed.

"You must consider them good friends to actually do something as drastic as rebelling." I stated.

"It took hours of reflection to determine my choices beforehand weren't what was best." He returned his attention to me. "Had I not rebelled when I did, then there was every possibility both Sam and Dean would have been persuaded into saying yes."

"Both?" My eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean both?"

"Dean is Michaels vessel. And if he said yes, as did Sam- Then the entire world would have suffered the aftermath. It would have been catastrophic. And, it was after meeting Sam and Dean that I realized the apocalypse was nothing more than glorified murder, it's completely unnecessary."

My fingers nervously tapped on the laptop. There was obviously quite a bit about my brothers that I needed to learn. I heard the rumors about the apocalypse, about Sam releasing Lucifer and being his vessel- But I had no idea that Dean was supposed to be Michaels.

"Seems to be that it's a good thing you came around when you did." I barely heard myself say that out loud. "To think that if you hadn't, and they would have done something so incredibly stupid and I never would have been able to meet them..."

I trailed off, figuring that what was to be said after that was implied.

"I healed the girl while I was out." Cas added, changing the subject, which was something I noticed happened a lot with this group. "Inconspicuously of course."

Even more so did I figure he would come in handy during a fight. Having a living magical band-aid to fix your wounds would have been extremely beneficial. Not to mention he could smite demons without even flinching.

"Are all angels as compassionate as you?"

"Unfortunately no. There are some, yes, that hold a special fondness for humanity, but most consider them nothing more than insects which need to be squashed."

"Hm." A frown creased my face. "I never would have figured them to be such dicks."

He smirked ever so slightly. "Dean refers to them in the same manner."

"So, tell me truthfully." I pushed aside the laptop so I could see him better. "Do you think there really is a way out of this whole Lucifer situation?"

He locked his eyes onto mine. "The only solution I see is to keep running. To avoid the apocalypse as long as possible. If Sam can resist saying yes, then at least we can take solace that more than half the world _won't _be destroyed."

"And there really is no other way of stopping the bastard? Is the only thing we can do is run away and keep him out of his cage?"

"The only one capable of subduing or killing Lucifer is Michael- Which then of course poses the difficult and unfortunate situation of Dean being Michaels vessel."

I let out a long winded sigh, as I stared blankly at the darkened outdoors. It seemed that running for my life was still going to be what I did best. At least I had Sam and Dean now to share it with. If they had to flee, then we could flee together. And, if worse comes to worse, then we could go down fighting.

* * *

Morning with the Winchester brothers was more than I had bargained for. It consisted of grumpy Dean grouching his way to the bathroom, where he stayed for nearly an hour while Sam and I had no choice but to cross our legs and wait. Cas was preoccupied with the television, and watching a George Foreman grill infomercial. He was trying to understand how such a small device could really be beneficial to the obese humans that bought them.

I was exhausted, much like I usually was. I hadn't went to bed until 4 a.m, and by the time I managed to drift off Dean was roughly shaking me by the shoulders at half past six.

When Dean finally left the bathroom Sam was decent enough to let me go second. After cracking the window, because let's be honest, it smelled like a dead cow in there- I brushed my teeth and pulled my hair into a ponytail, saying to hell with trying to make myself presentable. Chances were we would be up to our elbows in corpses, so what was the point in being pretty?

After I was out of the bathroom Sam went in next, and there was a heated discussion on where to get breakfast. Cas offered to fetch it for us, since he could poof himself anywhere quickly, but Dean refused claiming that unless he was the one to get it- He wouldn't get his god damned pie.

Pie for breakfast? I thought I was the only one that ate that, hm.

We checked out of the motel a little past eight, and piled into the car and started off.

The scenery whizzed passed, which only made me more drowsy. I guess I shouldn't have stayed up so late researching Malphas and his Father Crowley.

"So, what are we gonna do about this demon thing, huh?" Sam asked. "Since Cas couldn't find him last night he's still gonna be after us."

"No shit, Sherlock." Dean barked. "Well, let's see. We could, uhh- I don't know. Hunt him down the old fashioned way? Or, we could wait until he comes back with his offer and do what Cas suggested. Smoke his ass."

Sam grunted something intangible under his breath. "I still say we should hear him out more."

"Yeah, well. You don't get to voice your opinion on this, Sammy. Because we all know what happens when you're BFFS with a demon."

Sams head snapped so quickly towards Dean I could have swore I heard his neck crack. "Are you ever going to let that go?"

"Guys!" I shouted. "Can't we all just get along, hold hands and sing Kumbaya?"

Sam huffed and returned to staring out the passenger window, while Dean glared at me from the rear view mirror. No one spoke another word until we pulled into the parking lot of a small diner.

I lagged behind while Sam and Dean entered first. Cas followed but not before he gave me a sympathetic stare. He must have had the patience of a saint if he could deal with their petty squabbles without voicing a single word.

The diner was tiny, and smelled like burnt onions. The black and white checkered floors were dirty and stained, the tables wobbly and booths just as unappealing. Still, we each took a seat and Sam made it a point to sit beside me, so he could shoot threatening death stares in Deans direction, which he ignored by hiding behind his over sized menu. We weren't there five minutes before our waitress approached.

"What'll it be?" She asked.

"What's good here?" Dean asked.

"Spanish omelets ain't bad."

Dean curled up his lips at the thought. "I'll take the pancakes with a side of bacon, and what kind of pie do you have?"

"Cherry seems to be everyones favorite."

"Perfect." He closed his menu and tossed it aside.

"What about you, cutie?" She asked, directing her question towards Cas.

"He's on a diet." Dean answered before Cas could. "He'll just take coffee. Sasquatch will have the..." He paused and looked at the menu again. "The girly fruit plate with cottage cheese."

"I'll just have coffee and toast, Ma'am." Sam said, scowling bitterly.

She looked at me now with arched brows that seemed to have been tattooed on her face.

"I'll have the same as him." I said pointing to Dean. "With a glass of O.J."

She jotted everything down and placed our order- And, judging by the awkward tension at the table I could tell that Sam was about ready to explode.

"Girly _fruit _plate?" He asked.

"Only the best for you, buttercup." Dean smirked.

"You two are like a pair of bitching fourteen year old girls." I said.

"You want on my list?" Dean widened his eyes at me and I only sighed.

Shaking my head, I reached into my backpack and pulled out my i-pad, resuming the same research that I had the night before. Not that there was much to find on the world wide web when it concerned demons. Most info was completely inaccurate, and based mainly on lore. The rest was just laughably ridiculous. So, I couldn't exactly find what I wanted on the King of Hell Crowely. And something told me that Sam and Dean wouldn't be willing to divulge any tid-bits on the dude either. Maybe Castiel would?

My eyes shifted up from my i-pad long enough to catch him staring at me. He looked confused, which I couldn't understand why. But that wasn't the issue right now. I wanted to learn about Crowely, and he seemed more willing to speak than my two brothers- So I made a mental note that the next time we were alone, I would question him.

"So, we have until..." Dean looked at the clock on the wall. "8:30 pm to come up with a plan to take out Malphas. Any suggestions?"

Sam said nothing, and continued to scowl, probably realizing that anything he would say would result in name calling or another argument. Cas seemed deep in thought before nodding slightly.

"Maybe it would be best if we heard what the demon has to say." He started. "If he is distracted with forming some sort of deal, then he wouldn't suspect that I would come after him."

"All depends on who the quicker draw is I guess." Dean gave a fake smile to the waitress when she returned with our beverages.

"I do believe that I could beat him. And, should something happen to either of you- I could always fix it afterwards."

"Still not a comforting thought knowing we could get our necks snapped, regardless if you could fix it." I said.

"You have no idea how many times we've had to deal with that kinda crap." Dean said. "I've lost count of the times we've croaked."

"Let's try to come up with something that _won't_ result in us getting our necks snapped." Sam finally spoke. "So, what do we know so far? Malphas is Crowelys son, check. And Crowely wants him dead which he wants to avoid, check. If there was some kind of a spell, something we could use to completely subdue him so he couldn't pull the same stunt as last night..."

He trailed off, as everyone went into thought. We said nothing to the waitress when she brought us our plates. Dean dug in, stuffing his mouth full of pancakes and bacon, having no table manners what so ever which was hilarious.

"Last night you said that Crowely was pissed off at you?" I said. "Why exactly is he?"

"He's a demon." Dean said, spitting bits of pancakes in my face. "He's pissed at all of humanity."

"And this whole colt fiasco, what was up with that?"

"Samuel Colt was a Hunter, he created a gun that could kill anything. Demons, vamps, everything." Sam answered. I already knew that, every Hunter in the world knew about that gun. "We needed the colt to take down Lucifer, thinking it would work. Crowely gave it to us and told us to empty the barrel in his face. It backfired, the colt didn't work."

"But what about that makes you think he's pissed at you?" I looked from man to man. "I'm not defending a demon, don't get me wrong, but what about that makes you think he's angry and is gonna come after you?"

They went silent, and Dean seemed to forget he had a cheek full of pancakes.

"It was only an assumption." Cas answered.

I smashed the food on my plate until it was an unidentifiable blob.

"What are you thinking?" Dean asked.

"Not sure. Just..."

"What?" Sam nudged me. "You can say it, Lara."

"Well... Malphas said last night that Crowely put a hit out on him. And, I was thinking- Maybe the best way to be rid of a bad situation, is to stick another bad situation on _him_."

Dean dropped his bacon. "You mean, hand Malphas over to Crowely?"

Shrugging, I sipped at my o.j. "You have to understand that this is the first I've ever dealt with demons. I'm just throwing ideas up in the air. You guys have seen this Crowely first hand, you would know better than I on what to do."

I was prepared for them to announce that was the dumbest idea anyone had ever had, but instead they merely stared at each other.

"Since we don't really have any other way out..." Sam trailed off.

"It could work, but it might come back to bite us in the ass later." Dean went on. "Like, say, if somehow Malphas escapes. He sure as hell wouldn't mind coming after the ones who handed him over."

"Any alternative we could come up with could potentially be dangerous." Cas said. "The best course of action would be to place the three of you behind protective sigils, and I would be the one to handle the transaction with Malphas."

"Transaction means slaughtering his ass." Dean smiled.

"Correct." Cas stared at his coffee before taking a sip.

"But we aren't going to do that." Dean discarded that idea. "We aren't gonna tuck our tails between our legs and hide while you have all the fun. Lara will be the only one hiding behind a sigil."

"Excuse me?" I sat up straight.

"You heard me. And you'll do as your told."

Yet again, I said. "Excuse me?"

"Don't argue."

"Since when did you become my Father?"

Dean dropped his fork, which forced a loud clink to echo through the near empty restaurant.

"First, I never said I was your Dad. But, you came to us because you're in trouble. Which means that I'm gonna do what I can to keep your ass safe. If you don't like it. Too damn bad!"

Taken aback, the only thing I could do was sit there with my mouth agape. Sam, obviously uncomfortable with the situation fled to the mens room. Castiel poofed away, which left Dean and I alone.

"Listen." Dean sighed, lowering his voice. "You need to know something. I tried, Lara- I tried for years. After Dad told me about you I tried to find you, but he had you so well hidden I just couldn't do it. Every lead I had was nothing but a dead-end. After Dad died, I tried again. Sammy didn't know about it. I didn't tell him just in case it all fucked up. So, now that you're here I'm gonna do what I should have all along. Believe me I'm not doin this to be a dick, I'm doing it cause I'm your brother."

"Stop." I said, raising my hand. "I'm here because I chose to be. And just because that's the case, doesn't mean that you have to constantly worry about what's gonna happen to me. Believe it or not, Dean- I'm a big girl and I can take care of myself. So, that means you don't have to lock me in a room whenever there might be danger, and you don't have to ask Cas to watch me."

He furrowed his brows. "I never told Cas to watch you."

I fumbled slightly, trying to understand what he just said.

"You didn't?"

"No. Not that I don't trust Cas, but if anyone is gonna watch out for my sister it'll be me and Sam. Why did you think I asked him that?"

Sitting back, I rested against the lumpy cushioned booth and stared off at nothing. Was I mistaken, or did Cas say the day before while we were investigating that Dean had asked him to keep an eye on me?

"Never mind. I just thought you had is all."

Now I was confused. Either I was hearing voices that weren't there, or the sweet little angel lied to me. But, why would he? He just met me so there really wasn't any reason for it- Unless... Unless he still didn't trust me yet, and in order to prevent angering his besties, he was going to scope me out until he determined I wasn't some evil devil woman in disguise. Yeah, that had to be it. It was the only logical explanation. As far as I was concerned, that topic ended right then and there.

Sam returned from the bathroom, after taking a peak around the corner to be sure we weren't tearing each others throats out. After he took a seat, he gave a small smile.

"So, we all good here?" He asked.

"All good." Dean said, returning a smile which exposed, yet again, his full mouth.

"Where'd Cas flutter off to?"

"Who knows. I guess he wanted to avoid the awkwardness as much as you." I said.

He laughed. "Well, maybe. Anyways... What are we gonna do now?"

"Well I'm gonna finish my pancakes, sweetheart- Then after that, we'll hit the road." Dead said.

"And go where?" I asked.

"We can't go back to Bobbys." Sam leaned forward with his elbows on the table. "With Malphas on our tails, it would be stupid."

"Then we'll just drive around and keep our hex bags close. That way the bastard can't find us." Dean answered.

"We can't do that forever. You never know what might happen. It's bad enough that we're running away from Lucifer, we don't want to add the Prince of hell to that list too." Sam tore at his left over toast, leaving a crumby mess scattered on the table.

"Let's nip it in the bud." I said. "Before it gets anymore out of hand."


	7. Chapter 7

It was dark and slightly chilly. Water dripped down the walls into puddles, thunder boomed outside and the wind whipped through the gaping holes in the walls. It was an abandoned building, what it was I couldn't tell but Sam and Dean decided this place was the best area to conduct a meeting with Malphas. It was 8:20, which meant we had ten minutes before he showed up to get an answer to his offer.

Everyone scrambled like chickens with their heads cut off preparing the area. I was left in charge of creating a massive sized demons trap, while Sam and Dean readied the weapons and made molotovs out of what Castiel said, was Holy oil.

Still we weren't certain how we were going to handle this, and had concluded that calling Crowely to take his son away was just too risky. We didn't want to get rid of a powerful demon, by bringing an even more _dangerous _demon into the picture. Instead, our best case scenario was to trap the asshole and Cas would kill him. But, of course, there were several indescrepencies with that plan too. Somehow, I had a feeling we weren't going to make it out of this without a few cuts and bruises.

Little did I know at the time that those injuries would be my own.

"Everyone ready?" Dean asked, pausing momentarily with a molotov in his hand.

"As ready as we'll ever be." Sam replied.

Cas nodded slightly, taking his position outside the demon trap while Dean left the molotovs sitting on the ground behind him.

"I guess we wait now." I said, tossing my empty can of spray paint aside.

"What time is it?" Sam asked.

Dean checked his watch. "8:28."

"Since we're not summoning him this time, how exactly do you plan on getting him stuck in the trap?" I asked.

"Good question." Sam sighed. "I guess we just hope it won't come to actually trying."

"What are the chances this dude will just fly away when we deny his offer?" I went on. "Or, the chances of him tearing us to shreds for ticking him off?"

"I would say the second is much more probable." Cas said. He certainly knew how to cheer up a room.

Even though I was dreading what was to come I was thankful at least that Dean didn't try to lock me away somewhere. He dropped the entire convo about hiding me behind sigils and instead figured it would be best to have three guns instead of two. He did make it clear however, that I was to stay behind them and as he claimed, watch their backs. But yeah, I knew what that meant. That was his way of sticking his own ass on the line in order to spare mine.

Now we waited. Since there was no way of knowing when or wear Malphas would pop up, we each kept our eyes fixed on random areas of the building. I was watching the back door, while Sam and Dean kept an eye on the upper level, Cas, his attention was jumping all over the place as he continued to make slow circles.

"Something's wrong." He said, his tone seemed deeper.

"What?" Dean asked.

Cas didn't have the chance to respond before the wind outside began to blow so ferociously that what was left of the windows shattered inside. Jagged pieces of glass cascaded around us like razor sharp snowflakes which we tried to protect ourselves from by throwing our arms over our heads. Thunder rumbled so loudly the building shook, the lightning was blinding. If anyone was screaming or saying anything it couldn't be heard. I felt someone grab me by the arm, but considering being momentarily stunned by the lightning I couldn't see who it was. Judging by the grip and how fervently he was dragging me away, I knew it had to be Dean. We didn't make it far before suddenly my feet weren't touching the ground anymore and I felt myself tossed like a rag-doll across the room and slammed into the wall.

You always hear how people see stars after such an impact, and they weren't lying. Everything was cloudy and hazy and tiny points of white light drifted across my retinas. Not only that, but it was hard to breathe and as I struggled to choke in a breath I was met with only a sharp stabbing pain.

As the wind and lightning died down, screaming voices started to become more audible.

"What the hell was that?!" I heard Dean scream. "Where's Lara?!"

I blinked the fuzz from my eyes and noticed I had been thrown across the massive room and was now lying behind a pile of busted tables and chairs. I tried to croak out a response, but nothing could come out, instead it was only more wheezes.

A taste of metallic filled my mouth, and I spat a mouthful of blood onto the floor. What the hell just happened?

When I heard another voice join the others, I lied low and crawled as best as I could to get a view.

It was Malphas, and he didn't look at all happy. But, considering he was a demon I didn't figure that was uncommon.

"No one moves." He said, only then noticing that there was a person missing from the group. When his bloody red eyes moved over to the pile of crap I lied behind he smirked. "We're going to have a little talk, boys."

From what I could tell Dean and Sam looked beat up, but were still able to stand. Cas of course, held no injuries but for the first time since I met him he looked pissed. His fists were clenched so tightly I was certain his fingernails had to have been drawing blood from his palms.

"I heard you weren't going to accept my offer." Malphas continued, taking graceful steps towards them. "You should really watch your tones, you never know who could be listening."

Dean stood up straight, his forehead held a deep gash and a trickle of blood ran down his cheek.

"The waitress at the diner?" He asked, not expecting an answer.

"Seems as though she heard you claim you were going to turn me in to my Father." Malphas shook his head. "That is a grave mistake on your parts. You could have at least had the decency to hear me out."

"We never came in contact with Crowely." Sam said. "We swear."

"It doesn't matter. Clearly I can't trust the lot of you- So... Deal's off, naturally. Now I just need to know what's to be done with you."

I was getting dizzy, enough so that the room was spinning. It was like watching a film through an old time movie projector, split seconds of darkness, followed by movement. In between the shots of dark I witnessed Cas finally making a move. Screams and curses erupted and within seconds Malphas was shrieking in agony as his life was snuffed out. The bright light was too much to bare, and I shielded my face with my arm. In my opinion this was far too easy. He couldn't have let himself be killed so quickly, something had to have been wrong.

But the silence had finally returned, and I allowed myself to lie on the ground and try to void out the horrible pain in my left side. Footsteps quickly approached as Sam was the first to reach me. He carefully rolled me onto my back.

"Dammit, Cas, get over here!" He shouted. "Lara's hurt!"

They crowded around me as Cas knelt over and examined me closely, after which he raised his index and middle finger and lied them against my forehead. I waited for the pain to vanish, for the dizziness to subside, but nothing happened.

"What's taking so damn long?" Dean asked.

Cas pulled his hand away, his expression clearly baffled. He did the same thing a second time, only to lower his hand and shake his head slightly.

"I can't heal her." He stated. "Something is preventing me from doing so."

Dean cursed and gently tucked his arm under my neck and legs, then scooped me up from the ground. All I remember before blacking out completely was being lied in the backseat of Deans impala, and the four of us speeding away from the building.

* * *

I think I was pretty certain on what it would feel like to be trampled by a horse. There wasn't a part of my body that wasn't aching, my head felt like it would explode, and it still hurt to breathe. But at least I could do it without wheezing. When I finally forced my eyes open the first thing I saw was a bright white light.

Ah crap, I thought. I'm frickin dead. But no, the more I focused the more I realized it was the ceiling light of my hospital room. Yeah, now it was all coming back to me. I was thrown like a sack of potatoes across that empty building, cracking against the wall. Afterwards Dean drove me to the hospital, exceeding the speed limit by a trillion might I add. In between flashes of consciousness I remembered being wheeled into the ER as Doctors swarmed around me.

"Morning, sunshine." I heard Dean say.

I stiffly turned to see him leaning against the wall beside me. His forehead looked to had been stitched up, and other than that he suffered no other repercussions from Malphas. Sam, who was sitting in the typical hospital room recliner, had a bruise on his cheekbone but nothing else.

"Hey." I croaked out. "How long have I been out?"

"About sixteen hours." Sam answered. "You were beat up pretty bad."

"What the hell happened?" I looked around the room, and Cas wasn't there. "I thought your angel pal could fix booboos?"

"Normally he can. But, for some reason he couldn't with you." Dean said.

"Lovely. Any reason why?"

"No. He took off after we found out you were gonna be ok. Hasn't been back since."

I was too tired to try and care about that right now, sleeping for another sixteen hours sounded awesome.

"So what was the diagnosis?"

"Broken rib, punctured lung. Nothing too serious. You got lucky, Malphas could have broke your neck. Then we would have been really screwed." Dean pushed away from the wall. "You're gonna be here for another few days probably."

"Fuck that." I rubbed my aching head. "But, at least Malphas got himself nuked, so that entire escapade wasn't for nothing."

"About that." Sam stood. "We thought there was something strange about it. Since you're in this with us now, we wanted to ask your opinion."

"Really?" I perked up, not expecting that. I just assumed that Dean would continue to treat me like a delicate flower that needed protected. "I wouldn't be much help. I don't know much about demons."

"It was too easy." Dean added. "Malphas had the juice to tare us apart, not including Cas. He just stood there and let Cas take him."

"I thought that too, from what I could see where I was lying on the floor anyways."

Granted I was partially unconscious and writhing in pain, chances were I could have been mistaken. Or, maybe not, considering Sam and Dean thought the same thing.

My Doctor came in a few minutes later and I learned that my condition wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. My so called punctured lung wasn't so damaged that it required surgery, and other than the broken rib, it was just bumps and bruises. Yeah, I felt like I got run over my a mack truck, but it wasn't going to keep me in bed for several days. All I knew was that if Malphas hadn't of been hulk smashed by Cas, I definitely would have kicked his ass. I didn't take lightly to having my own butt kicked, it was humiliating and definitely wasn't the way I wanted to prove myself to my brothers. If anything, it was strikes against my credibility.

"So Cas vanished, huh?" I asked. "Is that something he tends to do often?"

"Sometimes. He's around when we need him- Other times I have no frickin clue what he's doing." Dean answered. "Probably jumping around from country to country trying to avoid his superiors."

"That's what he's got to deal with now." Sam sighed. "He risked a lot by siding with us."

"Well, when I get outta here. What will we do next?"

"What we always do." Dean smirked. "Take jobs, haunt monsters, and try to find a way to take down the devil."

Had any bystanders witnessed that response they would have thought we were insane. I could only imagine what normal people would have done had they known that what really happened in the world. If the Doctor who treated me heard I sustained my injuries from a foaming at the mouth demon, he probably would have tossed me into a padded room.

"Just another run of the mill work day." Sam smiled.


	8. Chapter 8

_ **Yet again, Thanks for all the reviews everyone!  
**_

* * *

_ **One month later**_

* * *

It wasn't like me to take a walk through a park trail, being surrounded by nothing but forests, chirping birds and squirrels. Not that it wasn't pretty, or a relaxing environment, but this was definitely not my everyday gig. I wasn't sure how far I was on the trail, all I knew was that the last person I had seen had been nearly an hour ago. A jogger, a woman with a tight red ponytail and i-pod blaring. Compared to everyone else I had seen today, I certainly didn't fit in. Mainly because my attire wasn't fitting at all with hiking or jogging.

My jeans held speckles of mud, my combat boots were equally covered in it. Just my luck the night before it had rained a deluge, which left the atmosphere sticky and humid and swarming with mosquitoes.

This hike sucked.

But I kept going, stopping every once in a while to examine a plant, flower or scurrying squirrel. When I heard a snap behind me a shot of adrenaline coursed through my veins.

With a quick glance from over my shoulder I saw nothing. The trail was completely empty, but a thick fog was starting to roll in.

Perfect, I thought.

I started walking again, keeping my eyes and ears open for any sign of movement. Yet again, there was a another snap of twigs as whoever, or whatever, was following me was getting closer.

Run. I told myself. It's time to start running. So that's what I did. I took off at a quick sprint successfully sliding through the mud and stomping through puddles. The trail was rocky and full of overgrown tree roots which were content with tripping me. No god dammit, I was not going to be like one of those chicks in a horror movie that trips and twists her ankle, therefore rendering herself a quivering mound of pathetic for the monster to rip apart. There would be no twisted ankles, no ripped blouses, and no being eaten or murdered by a serial killer.

I could hear galloping footfalls behind me, and after a quick peak over my shoulder I could see him. His white t-shirt was splattered with old blood, his face contorted into a twisted snarl that would make a normal person squeal in fear. Me? I just kept running, quickening my pace even though I knew this vamp was fully capable of pouncing on me.

After a sharp turn on the trail I saw the area where I could get away. It was between two tall pines, past that would be the exit which led to a recreational area with picnic tables swarming with families. This had to end before we reached them, though- After all, a blood-thirsty vampire with a mouth full of razor sharp fangs would definitely spook the people in the park. Which of course, would bring about hoards cops and news vans.

Yet again, I looked over my shoulder noticing he was getting closer- So I moved as fast as allowed and flew past the two tall pines. I skidded to a stop and turned just in time to see Sam and Dean jump out from behind the trees. Sam whacked the vamp in the chest with a thick branch, knocking him backwards. With a quick clean swipe Dean sliced his head off and finally all was quiet.

Trying to catch my breath, I shook my head and eyed the corpse on the trail.

"Good job." Dean said, shaking his machete free of blood.

"Next time you're going to be the bait." I huffed out a breath of air as Cas poofed next to me.

"Are you hurt?" He asked.

"No. I'm good."

"One vamp down." Sam said with a smile.

A week prior to the vamp losing his head, we had read in the papers that joggers were being murdered in Falls lake State park in North Carolina. The victims throats had been torn out and were all drained of blood. The perfect case considering that Dean was getting restless and the last real job we had was a simple haunting at an old folks home.

I moved closer and examined the corpse.

"He's a mess. Is it just me or are vamps usually cleaner than this. He looks like he's been on his own for a while."

"Might have been turned and left to fend for himself." Dean answered, he kicked at the head and it rolled a few inches away. "Remind me again why teenage girls think these fugly bastards are so sexy?"

"There's definitely more than one vamp." Sam added. "But what are the chances of the second being here in this park?"

Chances were good, especially since two seconds after asking that question a figure flew out of the trees and tackled me. He didn't last long of course because with another swipe of Deans machete his head flew away.

"Dammit!" I shrieked, being pulled back to my feet with assistance of Cas and Sam. "That asshole!"

"You need practice." Dean said, shaking his head. "You should have been prepared for that."

"Shut up. How was I to know that a vamp was gonna come soaring out of the trees?"

"I knew." He smirked. "I'm like a frickin ninja, nothing can surprise me."

"You're an idiot."

He raised his arms. "What, you think you could take me down? Go ahead, _bring it_. Try to hit me." He pointed to his jaw with his index finger. "Go ahead, petunia- Try to hit me right there and see what happens."

"It doesn't count if you know it's coming. How fair is that?"

"Alright, fine. Try to sneak up on me. I'll bet that you won't be able to do it. I have panther like reflexes..."

"I thought you were a ninja?"

"Ninja panther. So, just try to sneak up on me. We'll see what happens. Your ass will be flattened."

Sam rolled his eyes. "And if she wins this bet, what does she get?"

"I dunno. What do you want?" Dean looked at me.

"Ok." I grinned. "If I win, _you_ have to dress up like a chick for an entire day."

"What the..." Dean frowned. "Ok, fine. And If I win. _You _have to shave off your eyebrows."

"Guys." Sam interrupted. "Let's finish this in the car. In case you forgot, rotting corpses on the trail?"

We dragged the bodies into the trees and covered them over as best as possible with foliage before returning to the trail and exiting back into the picnic area. When we reached the car I climbed in the back, which was my assigned seat. Sam would never let me ride shot-gun. Cas sat beside me and before leaving he looked to me and said.

"If I can give some advice. I would suggest _not _shaving off your eyebrows. That could be considered very unappealing."

I smirked. "Oh I have no intention of losing this bet, Cas. Nope. Be prepared to see Dean as a pretty little lady."

Just as always Dean glared at me from the rear view mirror. After starting the car Sams cell rang.

"Hey, Bobby." Sam said. "What? Hang on, I'll put you on speaker."

He pushed the button then held the phone for everyone to hear.

"What's up, Bobby?" Dean asked.

"I think I might have found somethin." He said. "How far are ya?"

"We're in North Carolina, why? What did you find?"

"Would rather not talk about it like this. Start drivin."

The phone beeped as the call ended, and Sam lowered his hand and let out a sigh.

"Must be important. I wonder what it is?"

"Only one option." Dean yanked the car into drive and pulled out from the parking space. "Satan."

* * *

Everyone was exhausted and unfortunately couldn't make the entire drive to Bobbys in one go. We checked into another sleezy motel and once inside, I claimed a bed for my own. Since we had been traveling together it had been an interesting experience sharing a motel room with two grown men. Mainly because the nights consisted of teasing and waking up to some sort of prank. Dean made it clear that he was initiating me, which meant I had to deal with the tortures. The worst so far was waking up completely covered in shave cream. Of course I repaid that action by filling his shoes with vaseline. But, after the first couple of weeks the pranks began to die down- And now that a month had gone by we were finally beginning to be more comfortable with each other. Of course, that didn't mean that the teasing stopped, certainly not.

Sometimes I felt sorry for poor Sam, having to deal with two siblings who at times, were much too similar for comfort. The instances where Cas was there to witness the pranks, he merely looked on in confusion. On the night of my last prank, which was the vaseline filled shoes- He reluctantly held Deans shoe while I scooped out massive handfuls of the goo and shoved it in. Of course the next morning after Dean ruined his socks, Cas denied having anything to do with the action.

Yeah, it was definitely interesting and I couldn't help but wonder how things might have been had I known them from the beginning.

"You're sharing a bed with Sam tonight." Dean said, tossing his crap onto the second bed.

"No I'm not. That's just weird."

"You gotta. I can't take being dutch ovened by him one more damn night."

"Yeah? Well you'll spoon with anything lying next to you." Sam retorted. "That's even worse."

"Call the front desk, maybe they'll have one of those little roll away beds." I offered.

Once that was settled Sam went right to what he usually did, which was clicking around on his laptop. Dean locked himself in the bathroom and I lied down and flicked on the tv. Cas? He stood awkwardly beside the door.

I'll be honest. I wasn't quite sure what to make of the guy. Yeah I knew he was an angel which was awesome and all, but there was something about the vibes I got that couldn't easily be read. Even though it had been a month, I still got the feeling he didn't trust me. I would catch him watching me, and even once when I went to fetch breakfast- He followed me. There was still the unanswered question on why he couldn't heal me after my rib was broken. We knew it wasn't because he lost his mojo, because a couple weeks ago Dean broke his wrist and, ta da, after a touch by Cas it was healed. If I had to guess, I would say it spooked him. I mean, here he is, a powerful angel capable of smiting demons on a single bound, heal the injured and maimed, bring back the dead- And here I come along, with a minor injury that he can't fix. I was a mystery I suppose.

So while he was suspicious of me, I tried my best to ignore it. I couldn't exactly fault him for it. Besides, he was a nice guy, or angel, and had done more than a lot for Sam and Dean. That made up for the fact that he didn't trust me. I could get over it, it wouldn't hurt my feelings.

When Dean left the bathroom, he flopped onto the bed next to me and stole the remote.

"Anyone call Bobby and let him know we're gonna be late?" He asked.

"On it." Sam grabbed his cell and made the call. "Yeah, hey Bobby. We're in Peoria Illinois. We'll be there tomorrow."

After a moment of listening to Bobby he hit the speaker again.

"Better make it a quick trip." Bobby said. "I ain't sure how long I can hold this guy."

"Guy?" Dean sat up. "What guy?"

"A demon. Don't ask how I got em, just be thankful I did. He's in a trap right now and he's had some interesting info to spill. Like I said earlier, talkin about this on the phone ain't the best idea. So just hurry your asses up and get here."

He hung up without another word spoken, and Sam closed his laptop.

"Guess getting my four hours isn't in the cards." Dean groaned, rolling off the bed. "Let's go."

"You know. I'm not that tired. I could drive?" I suggested.

Sam snorted. "Right. Dean would rather cut off his right arm then let you behind the wheel. It's all I can do to make him let _me _drive."

"Maybe I can offer a solution." Cas said. "I could go to Bobbys and reconnoiter."

"English, Cas." Dean huffed.

"I could watch over him. Be certain that this demon isn't going to cause an issue. Bobby sounded as though he was in danger."

We stared at each other before Dean shook his head. "If that's the case we're all going."

"I'll pack the car." I said and grabbed our things, leaving the motel room and tossing our crap into the trunk.

After I closed it, there stood Cas waiting to scare me again.

"Hello, shadow." I said.

He gave me his signature confused look.

"Shadow?"

"Never mind. What's up?"

"Nothing."

Silent. I waited for him to say or ask something. But apparently he wasn't going to. I could deal with the suspicion, the following, the staring- But it was different when he was so completely obvious about it. I mean, he didn't even try to hide it. Normally when a person is trying to stalk another person they were a little more stealthy about it. Apparently though he didn't know what stealthy meant, because when I headed back inside the motel room he was right on my heels.

Once inside, I walked over to the dresser where Dean had left his pistol. I approached to grab Sams jacket when he suddenly leapt back like a snake bit him.

"What the fuck?" I asked. "What's your problem."

"You were coming at me." Dean answered. "Told you, I'm ready for anything."

This again... I had honestly forgotten completely about that damned bet.

"I wasn't coming at you. I was packing the car, dumbass."

"Still." He pointed to his eyes, then at mine. "I'm watching you."

This was going to get aggravating if Dean would jump or pounce every time I moved. It wouldn't surprise me if he refused to sleep, thinking I was going to attack him in the middle of the night. Still, even though it was slightly grating on my nerves, I was looking forward to actually getting a hit off on him and winning the bet.

I tossed Sam his jacket and we left the room not an hour after checking in.

As the motel and town grew smaller and smaller in the distance, I settled in for yet another long drive.

For the first couple hours I struggled to stay awake. Sam had passed out in the passenger seat and Dean was silently singing a Led Zeppelin song. Car rides were definitely more entertaining when everyone was awake enough to know what the hell was going on. But when the quiet of the night settled in, and everyone was left to their own thoughts- You couldn't help but reflect on how crazy and horrible things happened to be. I thought about what Cas had told me after just joining in with them. That the only person capable of subduing Lucifer was Michael. I didn't like to think that there was absolutely no way out. If Lucifer could be broken out of his cage then there had to have been a way to somehow shove him back in, _without _Michaels assistance.

But, this wasn't a normal situation. It wasn't some little vamp or ghost we were dealing with. It was the devil. Just say that out loud. _Satan_, was after us. How many people in the world could actually say that with a straight face? No one could but us... Yeah, it wasn't exactly unicorns and rainbows.

I glanced to Sam as his head bobbed around from the bumpy drive. I could only imagine how he felt about this situation- Knowing that because of a few bad choices he was responsible for letting the devil free. And not only that, but knowing that Lucifer wanted to wear his skin. No matter how things ended up, and if by some miracle we managed to get out of this- I didn't think he could ever live down such horrible mistake.

It's funny how I seemed to forget that Lucifer was after me too. And I didn't even know the reason yet. At least Dean and Sam knew why they were being chased. Dean was Michaels vessel, and Sam was Lucifers. What the hell was I? What possible reason would he have to want me?

Going back and pondering over questions that had no possible answers wasn't exactly helping matters much right now. It only led to further stress, and right now we couldn't afford that. We just needed to take it one day at a time no matter how frustrating it might have been.

My mind finally calmed enough for me to fall asleep, and before I knew it someone was lightly nudging me on the shoulder.

When I opened my eyes finally, I was surprised to see it was Cas. He offered a small smile.

"Dean asked me to wake you."

"Oh..." I sat up and stretched. "What time is it?"

"Almost noon." Dean said, smacking his hand on the roof of the car. "Let's go."

I pushed my door open and practically fell out of the car- Relieved slightly at seeing Bobbys house. He was already standing with the door open, waiting to escort us inside.

I hadn't seen him since our last meeting, but considering he looked about ready to fall down from being so tired- He skipped the usual bone crushing hug.

"Downstairs. Follow me." He said, leading the way.

We walked through his house and to the door leading to the basement. As soon as he opened it I choked back bile. Already I could smell what seemed like burnt flesh, blood and other unmentionable fluids. Don't get me wrong, I have a strong stomach, but this was to the extreme. Dean and Sam as well cringed at the scent as we descended the stairs.

It was dark but for the one light bulb which was blaring on the ceiling. In the middle of the floor was a devils trap with a half unconscious man strapped to a chair in the center. He was beaten to a pulp, bloody and bruised, and around his wrists and ankles were pure iron shackles. Obviously that's what attributed to the burnt flesh stench, his skin underneath the cuffs looked completely raw.

"Whoa." Dean said, taking a step forward. "You did a number on him, Bobby."

"I've been workin on him for hours. Tryin to get him to talk. He's one stubborn s.o.b."

"Who the hell is he?" Sam asked.

"He won't tell me his name. But, what he did say was enough. He was Malphas' right hand man."

Cas moved to the edge of the trap. "What did he say?"

"That Malphas was workin with Lucifer. That the whole deal he told you idgets about was just a cover for the big boss. Since Lucifer is having trouble tracking down his meat suit, _and_ Lara, he's been sending out heavy weight demons left and right. Malphas found you and reported it all back to Lucifer." He barely glanced at me. "Apparently Lucifers strategy has changed. If what this bastard is sayin is true. Lucifer is movin on from Sam and won't need him as a vessel."

"What?" Sams eyes widened slightly. "How is that possible? I thought his vessel now was melting?"

"It was, as far as we knew." Bobby shrugged. "What he says is that he's found a way to preserve it. A spell of some sort. If it's true then the only vessel left to worry about is Dean."

Cas faced Bobby now, his serious expression had returned. "Has he said _anything_ on Lucifers motives for wanting Lara?"

That was my next question and he beat me to it. Bobby let out a sigh and shook his head.

"That's one thing the bastard won't talk about. No matter how much holy water and salt I throw on him. He won't talk."

"Well." I shrugged. "At least we got partial good news though, hm? Maybe Sam can finally take a breather for once."

"Maybe we could get him to spill it." Dean said. "We've got the knife, if holy water isn't cutting it, then we'll just have to raise the stakes."

"Go ahead and try." Bobby said, pointing to the bloody man. "He's been quiet for hours now. Refuses to say another word."

"Perhaps I should try?" Cas offered. "I might make more of an influence."

"No." Dean pulled the knife out of his jacket. "She's my sister. I'll do it."

Sam attempted to voice an objection, which Dean wouldn't hear. Instead he ordered everyone out of the basement. Sam and Bobby headed for the stairs, but Cas and I stayed.

"Dude." Dean said, looking to Cas. "Go, take Lara with you. She doesn't need to see this."

"I'm a big girl, Dean. This concerns me so I want to hear what he has to say."

Finally for once he didn't object and I moved back far enough away to avoid the blood spray. I had seen a lot of gore in my lifetime, and had been the cause of most of it, so I tried not to flinch when Dean suddenly jammed the knife into the demons hand.

He began to scream of course, but refused to answer any of Deans questions. And for the next hour the situation didn't change. No matter what Dean did, or threatened, the man wouldn't speak. Instead, he only laughed at him and in his own taunting way asked to be killed. This was an exasperating and fruitless attempt. The demon wouldn't be swayed no matter how much pain he was in. He continued to laugh, curse, and taunt and I could tell Dean was about ready to blow.

"Dean." Cas reached over and grabbed his wrist, stopping him from taking another jab. "We're going about this the wrong way."

The demon looked up, his dark eyes were barely visible by how swollen his face was. Still, he smiled.

"Go ahead and let the angel do his work. I still won't talk." He said.

Cas remained cool and collected as he knelt over and stared into the demons eyes.

"What would happen if Lucifer were to learn of your treachery? Do you think he would take it lightly?" The demon cinched his mouth closed after that question. "What we will do now is take you to an empty field, keep you secured with a devils trap and leave you for Lucifer to pick off. Tell me, whos hands would you rather die by, ours, or his?"

I just barely saw Dean smirk after hearing that. If anything I heard about the devil was true, then chances were that demon would be filleted piece by piece for divulging any information, regardless if he kept quiet about me. He spilled the beans about Sam no longer being Lucifers vessel, and that could warrant severe and agonizing torture in return.

Finally the mans smile faded, and he swallowed a mouth full of blood.

"I can't tell you anything because I don't _know _anything." He said. "To my knowledge, Malphas was the only one that knew. Lucifer has been very careful about whom he shares his secrets with. Especially when it concerns her. He said that if too many knew about it, then it could be trouble for him. Because certain demons out there that aren't on his side would try to get her first."

"Demons such as Crowely?" Cas asked.

He nodded. "He's the one that causes the most concern, yes. I'm telling you the truth, I don't know why he wants her- But for whatever reason, it's important enough that he would risk _everything _to be certain that Crowely doesn't get his hands on her."

"Does he want her as a vessel?" Dean asked and the demon shook his head.

"No. The vessel he has now will suffice. He's solidified it with a spell, as I told your drunken redneck friend. Of course his first choice would always be Sam, but since he can't exactly count on his cooperation, he's not holding his breath on him saying yes. Now, that's all I know. Do me a favor and kill me now."

"One last question." I said, stepping forward. "Is the reason why Crowely put a hit out on his own son because he was sided with Lucifer?"

"Of course. That, and Malphas was responsible for dozens of Crowelys men being slaughtered."

Cas had heard enough apparently as he reached over and lied his hand on the mans forehead. I watched the bright light envelope the room as he let out a wail of misery before dying. Afterwards he turned and stepped out of the devils trap as if he had just swatted a fly. Nothing like _not _giving the asshole a warning before smiting him. Not that I cared much, he deserved what he got. As he passed me on the way to the stairs, his eyes said more than words could.

He was still just as confused as when I first showed up.

I watched him return up the stairs, and Dean cleaned his knife before placing it back in his jacket.

"That was uneventful." I said.

"I think that if we want to find out anything, it's gonna require something much more bloody."

"Not sure how that will happen though, Dean. Who else would know anything?"

He started for the stairs now too and I followed. "I'll figure something out."

No he wouldn't. No one was going to learn anything until the fateful day that Lucifer finally got me. Even then, hell, it still might have remained a secret.

Sam and Bobby were looking over books when we returned upstairs. Dean informed them that the demon was completely useless as far as info went and Cas had smoked him. Bobby muttered something about burying the body later and I stepped outside to get some fresh air.

It was cloudy and looked like rain, I could smell it in the distance- So I started walking past the house and through all of the junkers scattered around the property. I stopped at the garage where an outdoor table waited, and after sitting down and fixing my attention on the clouds I tried my best to relax.

I waited for it, and counted up to thirty before Cas appeared beside me on the table. Ten seconds longer than the last time it happened, he was slowing down. He stared off at the countless amount of rusted out and broken vehicles before I let out a sigh.

"So..." I said. "Are you going to tell me what's going on now?"

He let out a deep breath, and for a moment I was surprised that he didn't ask me what I was talking about.

"What do you want to know?" He asked.

"Why you're following me around for one thing. I know you lied about Dean asking you to do it, so you can't use that as an excuse now."

He nodded, still not looking at me. "If you want an honest answer, one that won't cause confusion I'm afraid I don't have it."

"That tells me nothing. Just say it. You don't trust me, I think it's a little obvious. After all, someone doesn't watch a person for hours or even follow them to a diner if they trusted that person."

He moved his eyes to mine. "It's not that I don't trust you, Lara. It's simply that I don't know _what _you are."

"Wh-What do you mean?"

"There is no logical explanation as to why I couldn't heal you. But, there is also no logical reason that I can think of as to why you aren't what you appear to be. Which is human. And, there is the pressing matter of how you have managed to stay hidden from every single angel in heaven and on earth." His eyes moved away for a split second. "Excluding Lucifer. And the fact that he is desperate to take you only furthers my curiosity."

"So because of some fluke you're ready to just assume that I'm... What? A demon? A monster?"

"You are neither of those things. As I stated, you appear to be human."

"But apparently that's not enough for you to let this go. So, what do you want to do about it?"

His jaw clenched, which told me I wouldn't like his response.

"There is only one thing I could do that would ease my conscience. And if Sam or Dean were to find out about it... Needless to say they wouldn't be pleased with my actions."

"What is it? If it will stop your suspicion then do it. I don't exactly want an angel pissed off at me."

He stood from the table and faced me. "It requires me touching your soul. In order to see if it could somehow be tainted."

"And that's bad... Why?"

"It is extremely painful, not to mention dangerous. Personally I'm not willing to take the risk simply because of a nagging suspicion."

"You would have never brought this entire thing up if you didn't want to do it." I stood as well. "If touching my soul will put this matter to rest. Then do it. I don't care how painful it is- I don't want anyone thinking that I'm not who I say I am."

"You don't understand. I cannot preform the procedure because afterwards it would require healing you. Which is something I clearly can't do."

"Oh... And there's no other way? A spell maybe? Something?"

"No. Which is why, since I have no way of knowing the truth, that I've been watching you. I've been trying to sense if maybe there was something there- But there's nothing."

I started walking and he followed. "Something tells me you aren't going to let it go at that. What about consulting in some of your angel buddies?"

"That's not necessary because I can hear them speaking. No one has made any mention of you, which is how I know you're, as Dean would put it, not on their radar."

"Maybe the reason for that is because I'm not important? I'm not a frickin vessel, I don't have anything to do with the apocalypse. Yeah, ok. Maybe Lucifer is after me, but think about it, Cas. If for whatever reason he wants me was important, don't you think your fellow angels would already know about it and try to put a stop to it?"

That made him stop and think, finally. "You might be right."

"Listen. I don't know what I can do to prove anymore than I've tried that I'm not a monster in disguise, so- If you feel it's necessary to distrust me, then go ahead there's nothing I can do about that. Maybe eventually that paranoia will go away. But in the mean time, instead of watching and following me like a sneak, just flat out ask me. Got it?" He nodded slightly. "Eventually Sam or Dean will notice how you're acting, and what would you tell them if they asked what was going on?"

"Do you know how your Mother died?" Was his response. He completely ignored my question.

"What? No, I don't. I was barely a year old. John never really talked about it, much like he didn't with a lot of things. I don't even know her name, what she looked like, where she was from. Nothing."

"And you don't find that strange?"

The only thing I could do was gape at him. "Of course it's strange, but that was John. His life revolved around keeping secrets and being a crappy Dad."

"If I were to try and find information on your Mother would you object to it?"

"If I did would that stop you?"

He said nothing, but his expression appeared cocky and defiant. Nope, it wouldn't stop him. He was going to do it anyways. No I really didn't have any issues with him trying to get details on my Mom, even though I knew it would be pointless. Something told me John had been very thorough on hiding everything he could about my past.

Considering the topic of conversation I couldn't help but think about the mystery envelope that was safely secured in a lock-box. The answers I needed were inside that damn thing. I just knew it. And, I was beginning to wonder if listening to John was necessary anymore. He was dead now and wouldn't know one way or the other if I decided to open it.

Since Cas didn't trust me, I figured that, maybe- If I confided in him this little secret it would help to give myself a few brownie points.

"Cas..." I folded my arms in front of me and waited for the inevitable clap of thunder. I figured maybe there would be some kind of sign that telling him about this was wrong, but there was nothing. "There's something I think you should know. But, I want to know if I can trust you to keep this a secret. Sam and Dean can't know about it."

"Of course you can trust me. If you can assure me that whatever this is won't be a threat?"

"I highly doubt it." I ground the toe of my boot into the gravel. "So, before John died he gave me something. Before you ask what it is, I don't know. He had it in a manila envelope and told me not to open it unless I was extremely desperate."

"Where is this envelope?"

"Hidden. In a safe place. I told you about it just in case someday I might need to go and get it. I have a feeling it has answers, and the other reason why I'm only telling you about this is because I figure if I can't trust a frickin angel, then who can I trust?"

He nodded, his eyes falling to the ground. "So, when the time comes you feel you're ready to take this object again, you want me to help you do it?"

"Actually. I was thinking you would be the one to get it. I figured, maybe that would be the way to get you to trust me once and for all."

Judging by the crooked smile he gave me, I had a feeling he didn't mind that plan.

"Hey!" I heard Dean call out. "Joanie and Chachi, get your asses back in here!"

Cas tilted his head. "Who's Joanie and Chachi?"

I chuckled and rolled my eyes. "Never mind."


	9. Chapter 9

To my surprise Dean announced we were taking a few days off to get some rest and study through Bobbys book collection. I wasn't sure what they were looking for, but naturally it pertained to Lucifer. Why they seemed to think they could find anything written down about Lucifers intentions with me, was beyond me.

What I didn't tell them was that I had read nearly all of these books at least twice. During my stay with Bobby when I was a kid, and the weeks I had with nothing to do- Bobby lied stacks of books in front of me for as he claimed, was my education. It didn't hurt that I was already interested in learning about demons. Sounds kinda crazy now that I look back on it. A ten year old girl actually excited to read scary stories about the devil and his minions.

We were definitely a messed up family.

I flicked through the pages of a dusty book, glancing over the depictions of Satan slaughtering villages and cities in Biblical times. And then Michael casting him into hell and locking the supposed door. There were mentions of four horsemen, earthquakes and famines, all the jolly good stuff that came along with the apocalypse. This was what we were going to be looking forward to in the near future if we didn't fix it.

Dean slid a plate with a piece of pizza on it across the table to me, along with a bottle of beer. I wasn't exactly hungry, but considering I hadn't eaten since the night before I forced down a few bites, after which washing it down with a considerably large gulp of beer.

It was after dark now, which meant we had been reading and researching all day. My eyes were tired and fuzzy, and my head ached. But I continued to read because I knew if I stopped both Sam and Dean would bitch at me. They couldn't understand how I was so calm about the situation. Apparently they thought I should have been ranting and raving, or climbing the walls in hysteria. But that wasn't in my nature. I tried to look at things rationally instead of blowing a gasket and shrieking at anyone near me. I preferred to believe that there was always a way out that wouldn't result in a painful death, or the painful deaths to those I cared about.

Since my conversation with Cas in the junkyard earlier, we hadn't the chance to discuss it further due to the fact we hadn't had any alone time. I knew he had more questions, possibly contemplating on whether or not I was fibbing about the contents of the envelope. But of course I wasn't. I told him as much as I knew, other than what was inside the envelope felt, more or less, like a book of some sort. But that was just minor details, not something important.

Even so, he circled the kitchen and Bobbys den, annoying the crap out of Dean who was trying to read.

"Cas, what the hell, dude. Why are you so antsy?" He asked.

"It's nothing."

"_Ok_." He and Sam exchanged glances. "Why don't you make yourself useful then? Pick up a damn book."

"I'm familiar with everything that's been written in them. You're wasting your time in trying to find information on Lucifer. The only one that might have answers would be the prophet."

"Yeah, that might be true- But Chuck hasn't called us." Sam said. "And he hasn't answered when we call."

"Zachariah is preventing him from coming into contact with us." Cas went on. "I speculate that reason is because Chuck has seen something that Zachariah doesn't want us to know about."

"I hate that guy." Dean said. "He's just confirming more and more everyday that he's a bag of dicks." He stood and slammed his book shut. "I'm goin out for a beer run, I'll be back in fifteen."

He grabbed his keys and stomped out the door. Sam lied his own book aside now and rubbed his eyes.

"Cas, do you think you could maybe pop in on Chuck and see what he has to say?" He asked.

"The chances of me returning after that aren't likely. Honestly I'm surprised that we managed to speak with him a month ago without repercussions."

Sam sighed, and I noticed him pass me a glance from where he sat in the next room. Just as always he offered a small smile which I returned.

"Get some shut-eye, kid." Bobby said now. "You look beat."

"Yeah-" Sam stood and gave a little stretch. "Maybe I will. Wake me up in an hour or so. Mind if I go upstairs?"

"Go ahead." Bobby didn't take his eyes off his book.

Sam hadn't been upstairs for five seconds before Cas came into the kitchen and sat down across from me.

"I've been thinking about what you shared with me earlier." He whispered. "Is there any chance that whatever your Father gave you could somehow belong to Lucifer?"

For a moment I actually sat there with my mouth hanging open. Oh. my. god, how stupid can a girl get? How had I never even contemplated that the reason Lucifer might have been after me was because of what was in the envelope? Duh, it was the only reason why. Well, it was official- I now felt like the biggest idiot in the world.

"Um." I tried to play off the dumb. "Well that seems like the only logical answer, doesn't it?"

He nodded. "Which is why we must be extremely cautious. Are you absolutely positive that it's in a secure location?"

"As secure as it could be I suppose. John told me not to trust it with anyone. Not even Bobby. He made it clear that I was the one that had to protect it. So, I have."

"Now the only questions is what sort of artifact is it that Lucifer would want so greatly?"

"You would know more than me. After all, he is an angel, and _your _brother."

"The only possible answer I have is that it's a weapon of some kind."

"Well, not to burst your bubble- But it felt more along the lines of a book."

His eyebrows twitched. "A book?"

"Yeah. About two inches thick or so."

"It could be a book of spells. Or something else even more dangerous." This was the most unnerved I had ever seen him, and even so he was remarkably calm compared to a normal person.

"Does something like that even exist?"

"There are myriads of holy artifacts scattered around the world. Some of which haven't been seen for thousands of years. It could be a number of things." He paused when he heard Bobby shift in his seat. "Yet again I'll ask are you certain it's in a secure location?"

"Well, compared to carrying it around with me for several years, yeah- Where it's at now is a lot safer."

Our conversation ceased when Dean stepped back inside.

"Bobby, you got a spare tire?" He grumbled. "I didn't even make it out the damn drive."

Bobby tossed his book aside and left with Dean, Cas mumbled something about not wanting to cause suspicion so he followed them as well. Which left me alone since Sam was still sleeping. I went back to reading my book and was momentarily mesmerized by another drawing of Lucifer. In this particular depiction he was shown as a fire breathing serpent.

"He's actually considered one of, if not _the_, most beautiful archangel." A man said beside me.

I nearly jumped out of my skin when I looked up and saw a tall middle aged man, slightly balding and wearing a suit.

"I always found it amusing when humans would describe Lucifer like that. It's completely inaccurate."

"Who the hell are you?" I asked, standing quickly.

He smiled and raised his hands. "Now, now. Calm down. Don't get your panties in a twist. I'm Zachariah. And..." He pointed at me. "_You're _Lara Winchester, aren't you?"

Zachariah. Dick angel, as Dean described him. One that was causing them trouble and from what I had heard, wanted to kick the crap out of Cas for siding against him.

It seemed as though Cas and Dean had angel radar, or maybe Cas did? Either way, Cas was the first to poof in front of me while Dean came through the door followed by Bobby. Before long Sam as well came flying down the stairs. What was with these guys? Were they frickin psychic?

"That didn't take long." Zachariah beamed. "Before you start bashing me over the head with your cavemen clubs- I've just come here to talk."

"What do you want?" Cas asked.

"Well-" Zachariah wouldn't wipe that smirk off his stupid face. "I had heard some rumors, some pretty disturbing ones as a matter of fact- And thought that I would come and see for myself on whether or not they're true." His eyes settled on me. "And, now I see that they are."

"What rumors are those?" Dean asked.

"Hm?" Zachariah pretended not to understand. "Oh, it's nothing. But now that I'm aware of the situation... Seems as though plans are going to have to change."

"Plans? What plans?" Dean and Sam were side by side creating a wall between Zach and me.

"Don't worry, Dean- We still expect you to say yes to Michael. But for right now that will be put on the back burner. After all, something big just turned up." He laughed. "Don't get cocky boys. The cards haven't dropped in your favor just yet."

"What the hell are you talkin about?" Bobby asked, he had his shot-gun pointed in Zachs face, even though it was obvious it would do no good.

Zachs eyebrows arched and he pointed sarcastically at each of them. "You mean you don't know?" When no one spoke he grinned. "Perfect. That's just... Perfect. Believe me I would _love_ to solve the mystery but I have my orders. Not to discuss it with the mud-monkeys here on earth. Castiel, let me give you a piece of friendly advice." He moved closer, his smile fading. "Do yourself a favor. Come back home where you belong, stop siding with these primitive apes before it's too late. You never know when she'll start... Purifying prematurely."

Purifying? What the hell was that supposed to mean? I'm assuming he meant me because he was clearly looking straight at me after those words escaped his idiotic mouth.

After that comment Cas had gone noticeably stiff- And with a flutter and gust of wind Zachariah was gone.

"Someone tell me what the hell he meant by that?" Dean asked, turning to Castiel. "Cas? What did he mean?"

Cas had gone mute, either that or he just couldn't force the words out. Instead he turned and looked at me, his blue eyes were widened in a sort of shock or awe that I had never seen.

"Cas?" Sam prodded now. "Do you know what he meant?"

"No." He answered. "I have no idea what he was talking about."

Everyone exchanged worried glances, Dean obviously didn't believe him.

"Are you sure about that?" He asked.

"Positive. If I knew anything, of course I would tell you."

He was clearly lying, it was so obvious. He was an angel, something told me he didn't do it very often.

"Right." Dean pursed his lips and focused on me for a moment. "Well, I suppose we were right. Chuck must have seen something. And it's gotta be big."

I felt sick to my stomach, this was not going to end well. First, Cas admits to me that he was suspicious of who or what I was- Then this Zachariah douche-bag shows up and pretty much just makes me ten times more paranoid. Purifying? What did that _mean_?

Castiel knew. It was written all over his pretty face, it shone from his eyes. He knew what that meant, but I had a feeling he wasn't going to be kind enough to tell me what it was.


	10. Chapter 10

Sleep didn't come easily, in fact- I spent the majority of the night tossing and turning, feeling as though eyes were watching me from the darkness. Several times I had to sit and and be certain there wasn't actually someone standing there.

But there was nothing. Nothing but silence that was deafening to the point of madness. The dark shadows on the walls and floor sent shivers up my spine- And I realized that I hadn't felt such a sensation since I was a small child. It wasn't like me to be afraid of the dark, in fact- I never really had the opportunity to be. The last time I ever slept with a nightlight was when I was four. John had always said that fearing the dark was ridiculous and a waste of energy, instead you should fear what could be _in_ the darkness.

What a thing to tell a little girl. It's a wonder I didn't wet my bed up until puberty.

Sam and Dean were camping out in Bobbys den. Before I said goodnight poor Sam had lost a game of rock paper scissors and was rolling out a sleeping bag on the floor. Dean had already passed out on the cot. I was upstairs in the spare bedroom, which was little more than a storage area for books, occult paraphernalia and cardboard boxes. There was a twin sized bed pushed against the far end wall, which was dusty and lacking in cushion- But it was better than the floor.

I wasn't sure what time it was, but I knew I had been awake for over an hour. As I sat up, and pulled the thin blanket up over my legs, a streak of lightning suddenly illuminated a figure standing in the corner.

I seriously almost crapped myself, before realizing it was Cas.

"What the hell are you doing in here?" I asked, it came out far more aggressively than I had intended- But he scared the shit out of me.

"My apologizes." He uttered.

"So is this something that you do on a regular basis? Watching people sleep."

"Occasionally. Although it's not for perverted purposes."

"Well I certainly hope not." I reached over and flicked on the lamp beside the bed.

He finally stepped away from the corner, pausing to glance at the hoard inside Bobbys spare bedroom.

"Why are you in here watching me like some creepy stalker?"

He stared at the end of the bed, as if he was asking for permission to sit down. I merely nodded an ok and he stiffly sat.

"I felt it was necessary I suppose." He answered.

"Why?"

"Because Lucifer is after you."

"And you think he's going to swoop in here while I sleep and make off with me?" He didn't answer, which I didn't mind. "Care to tell me what had you so spooked after ass-hat left earlier?"

"Zachariah?"

Wasn't it obvious that was who I was implying?

"Yeah, what did he mean when he said I would start purifying prematurely?"

"It was a figure of speech. Angel humor." He really was a terrible liar.

"Tell me the truth. You knew what he meant, didn't you?"

"It's a possibility. Although, I'm reluctant to speak of it."

I pushed the covers from my legs and swung around until I was beside him. He seemed slightly surprised by my sudden movement and only stared at me.

"If this is about me then I think I have the right to know. What did he mean?"

"If I tell you-" He locked his eyes on mine. "It could do more harm than good."

"I have a _right _to know." I repeated, my tone was gruff and annoyed, which he clearly noticed.

He swallowed twice in a row, which was something I had never really seen him do. It made me wonder if he was actually afraid to talk about it.

"It is pure speculation. But- If I'm correct. I believe I know what you are. And if I _am _correct, your life is in even more danger than originally thought." He seemed to think that was explanation enough, but my "I'm gonna kick your ass" face made him continue. "Have you ever... No, I need to go farther back." He trailed off, deep in thought for the longest ten seconds of my life. "Have you ever heard of the seraphim?"

I thought for a moment, then shrugged. "I think I've heard angels called seraphs before, is that the same thing?"

"No." He shook his head. "Man made religions are grossly inaccurate. The seraphim were what was considered the highest ranking angels in heaven. The ones that would sit beside Gods throne. They were considered purifiers, used to cleanse sin with fire. They were very powerful to say the least."

"Were?" I didn't like where this was going already.

"Centuries ago, shortly after Lucifer was cast down from heaven- The archangels slaughtered them, all of them. After God disappeared it was anarchy. Constant battles that were... _Devastating_. Michael and Raphael led the slaughter. Their purpose for doing so was to, in all essence, gain control."

"So, they considered the serpahim to be, what- Competition?"

"More or less. But, they were killed... All of them, at least that's what we thought at the time."

"I really hope you aren't saying what I think you're saying."

"As I said it's speculation, Lara. It was the only thing that came to mind after Zachariah made that comment. The Seraphim were used to cleanse the sinful with fire. Hence, how they acquired the status of Purifiers." He eyed me up and down. "You are human, Lara- At least that is what my senses are telling me. But why would Lucifer be after you? Why would Zachariah risk being killed by me, just to see if the rumors he heard were true?"

I stood, nearly tripping over the blankets that were twisted around my feet.

"This is ridiculous. So, you're saying that you think I'm half angel?"

"Technically no. The seraphim are completely different than an angel such as myself. Not only are their abilities a drastic contrast, they were created solely for the purpose of being heavens most powerful weapons."

"I thought that's what archangels were supposed to be?"

"They are... Now. But that was only after the Seraphim were slaughtered."

After letting out an exasperated breath of air, I pushed the hair from my eyes.

"This is crap. Everything you've just said is complete and total crap."

"Why? You said so yourself that you had no idea who your Mother was. John never even told you her name. You claimed that John kept you hidden, ordered you to stay away from demons. And your brothers."

"Sure, when you say it like that..." I rolled my eyes. "There is no proof of this. You said that I was human, you sensed I wasn't anything _other _than human. So, until there is definite proof that I'm... _That_... This topic ends here and now. You won't mention it again, and you especially will _not _tell Sam and Dean. Understand?"

He stood, his posture straight and tall. "I already told myself that this wouldn't be spoken of with anyone else. But you must understand it's only a matter of time before this comes out in the open. Zachariah already knows. Lucifer as well. Before long even demons will catch wind of it. Which means..."

"I'm screwed."

"Precisely."

I fell back onto the bed and took my head into my hands. Why did I have to wake up? Why couldn't I have just slept through the night and not noticed Cas standing in my room?

"So, if I am... _That_-" I just couldn't say the word, it sounded so ridiculous. "Why is there no sign of it?"

"That's what I don't understand either. If your Mother was a seraphim then you should hold the same powers that she had. I would be able to sense your grace, which is presently absent." I could feel his eyes searing into the top of my head. "Lara. Will you tell me where you've hidden the book?"

"Why?"

"It's imperative that I learn the entire truth of the situation. If there is a remote possibility this item John Winchester gave you could give us that..."

"Detroit Michigan." I interrupted. "In a safe deposit box."

"Which bank?"

"Farmers & Merchants. On main street." I stood and grabbed my backpack beside the bed, sifting through until pulling out the key, after which I handed it to him. "You'll need that. Box number 125."

He stared at the key for a moment. "I will return shortly."

Hearing the flutter and feeling the slight gust of wind, I closed my eyes and prayed. Yes, actually _prayed_, that he was wrong about this.

In the short few minutes that he was gone I had began to pace, my stomach was twisting- My mind spinning. I always felt there was something off about me, I knew there was something being hidden but never in my life would I have expected this. I mean, who would? How unbelievably arrogant would a person have to be if they assumed that they were... No, I wouldn't say the word. Not until I was one hundred percent positive.

When Cas returned he held the entire box in his hands. He hadn't opened it yet, and instead lied it on the bed.

"Go ahead." I said. "I don't think I want to do it."

His eyes were sympathetic, which I was thankful for. At least there was some sort of emotion in them. After slipping the key into the lock it snapped open, and I was halfway relieved, halfway regretful, that the envelope was still inside.

Gingerly he removed it from the box, acting as if it were some precious and fragile ornament that would shatter at the slightest touch. After giving him the go ahead, he tore the envelope open and reached inside.

I wasn't surprised to see him remove a book- But I was surprised to see it wasn't nearly as old as I figured it would be. In fact, it looked relatively new.

"It appears to be a journal." He stated. "Shall I read it?"

I only nodded as he flicked the first page open. His eyes scaled over whatever was written before his face went blank.

"This is..." Stopping, he swallowed again. "This is written by your Mother. Her name was Sauriel."

"Do you recognize that name?"

He nodded. "Yes. We believed her to have been killed centuries ago." My heart sank after that as he flicked through the pages again. "The majority of this journal is her life story, her centuries of fleeing and hiding from Michael. And her encounter with John Winchester twenty three years ago. She claims that it was accidental, that John was not aware of her true identity."

Sometime while he was speaking I had sat on the bed again. "And?"

"And she speaks of becoming impregnated, which was accidental as well. During the gestation period she could feel that her child was much like her. It frightened her." He turned the pages with such grace it actually mesmerized me. When he stopped on the second to last page in the journal, his eyes met mine. "I understand now."

"Understand what?"

"Why I can't sense your grace." He closed the book. "It's been hidden behind a spell."

I tried not to puke on his shoes, trying to convince myself that this wasn't real. It was just a weird and very fucked up dream.

"A spell?" No such luck, I wasn't waking up. Unfortunately this was reality.

"Yes. One that forces your abilities to be dormant. One that can be reversed if the incantation written here is spoken."

"Don't say it!" I suddenly leapt to my feet and snatched the book from him. I crammed it back in the envelope and then the box. "Take it back. Please, just take it back. Make sure it's locked in it's slot. _Please_."

We stared at each other, and I'm sure he wasn't the only one that seemed stunned by the entire situation. My face surely had to have been panicked, not to mention a shade of green. I was still convinced I might puke all over him. But, he took the box from my hands and disappeared. This time he was only gone thirty seconds before returning.

"Remember. You promised." I said. "You won't tell them."

"I believe I am understanding the definition of irony." He said with a slight lilt of a smile. "Two siblings, one who was tainted with demon blood, and another who could easily cleanse him of his sins. It seems to have been fated."

"This isn't fate. Fate is nothing but a steaming pile of pig shit. No, buddy- This is a frickin curse."

He seemed much more pleased with the turn of events than I was. Now was the moment I felt as though I might turn all banana-cakes and start shrieking just as Sam and Dean thought I should have done a long time ago. Either that or getting ridiculously shit faced. Of course either of those options would only cause my brothers to wonder why I was suddenly freaking out. I was going to have to play dumb, and so was Cas.

* * *

By some miracle I managed to fall asleep, and actually didn't wake up until ten. Which is something I hadn't done in years. Last night was somewhat of a blur, although not hazy enough to make me forget what I had learned.

Nope. No, I refused to acknowledge it. Cas was full of crap. I wasn't what he said I was, and I wouldn't believe it not matter how much evidence was waved in front of my face. So I vowed to myself right then and there I would live in blissful ignorance. As long as we didn't talk about it, then it wasn't there, it never happened.

With that thought in mind I got dressed and headed down the stairs. Already I could hear voices coming from the kitchen, and as I rounded the corner- My nerves were flaring.

Sam was sitting at the table with Dean, they were eating what looked like scrambled eggs while Bobby stood at the stove.

"Mornin." Dean said with his mouth full. "We thought you might have died up there, lazy ass."

"I overslept." Nothing like stating the obvious.

"At least someone is able to do that." Sam smiled.

So far so good, they didn't seem to suspect anything so I slithered through the kitchen and to the counter where a pot of coffee waited. After overloading my cup with cream and sugar I took a sip and let my eyes scatter around the house.

"Where's Cas?" I asked.

"Don't know. Haven't seen him yet this morning." Dean answered.

"Breakfast is on the stove, Lara." Bobby said, motioning to the skillet with eggs and bacon.

I absent mindedly piled my plate high, gaining a raised brow in return from Bobby.

"Hungry?" He snickered.

I mumbled something under my breath before pulling up an extra chair and sitting at the table.

"So we got a case." Dean stated. "In Colorado. You up for it?"

"Why wouldn't I be up for it?" I chuckled nervously. "What's the job?"

Sam motioned to his laptop. "Highlands Ranch Colorado. Womens bodies have been found, all of which had responded to an add in the local paper. A personals add."

"What's so strange about that?" I shoved a bite in my mouth. "Sounds like a serial killer or something, not up our alley."

"Let me finish." He sneered. "The women disappeared over the course of a several week span. The first was over a month ago, and the last was discovered just three days ago. They were drained of blood."

"Not another vamp case?"

"Not sure. Could be a number of things, really. Just as always we won't know til we actually get there and check it out." Sam closed his laptop.

This was perfect, I thought. Just what I needed to take my mind off of all this crazy nonsense that Cas spewed the night before. Nothing like slicing off a few heads to make a girl happy, right?


	11. Chapter 11

There was something about Colorado that I just didn't like. The atmosphere gave me a weird vibe, it was uncomfortable. Or, maybe it was just because no matter how much I tried to keep my mind off of _that_- It just kept taunting me. I tried to focus on the information we had on the job so far- And after stopping at another cheap motel, and changing into our usual costumes, we flitted off to the morgue.

Sam and I headed up the steps, while Dean went to the police station. Three is not a crowd when examining corpses, it usually led to the medical examiner questioning why it took so many people to look at a dead guy.

We flashed our badges, spouted the usual drivel that everyone always fell for, because honestly- Why wouldn't they? And the young man in a white lab coat led us to the victims. There were only two left, since this case had been going on for over a month, the others had already been cremated or buried.

He pulled them out of their freezers, and lifted the sheet off of the first woman.

She was brunette, slender and probably would have been decent looking if she wasn't ten shades of blue. The second woman was basically the same, brunette, petite and attractive.

Sam took a closer look, as the medical examiner left us in peace. He waited until we were alone before yanking the sheet off completely and looking for anything strange.

"Doesn't seem to be a vamps work." I stated. "Seeing is that her throat hasn't been torn out."

"Yeah, not a vamp we're dealing with." He moved along the body and moved her right arm. "Injection wounds here." He pointed to the fold in her arm.

I grabbed the paperwork left behind and scaled over it.

"Toxicology reports say that there was nothing out of the ordinary. But their was high levels of alcohol in vic number five." I pointed to one of the brunettes. "But the others had no traces of it in their systems. So, she must have been killed shorty after meeting this yahoo from the personals. Unless of course, the other vics didn't drink." I continued to read. "Cause of death of course was massive blood-loss."

Sam covered the first body and moved on to the second. Her outcome was exactly the same as the other woman- No signs of physical trauma despite the puncture wound in her arm, and of course, being completely drained of blood.

"There isn't much to get from the bodies." He said, then his cell rang. "Guess we'll see what Deans found out."

He answered and I could barely hear Deans voice.

"Ok." Sam gave me the signal it was time to go and we exited into the hall. "There was no way of tracing who placed the add?" We stopped on the front steps and Sam finally hanged up. "Well- Seems that there isn't a way to find who placed the personal add in the paper. Which means that the cops are getting no where, and that this guy is still running loose."

"Good news for us, huh? Where were the bodies found anyways?"

"Deans got the info with him. He'll pick us up and wants to get something to eat. We'll talk about it then he said."

Just as usual whenever I was with Sam I felt like I was standing next to a sky scraper. I shifted my eyes upwards and examined him closely. You wouldn't think it to look at him that he had done something as foolish as drinking demon blood. With those puppy dog eyes and sad clown face no one would ever expect it. And to think that if Cas was right about what I was, and if maybe someday I could somehow help Sam... It would be worth saying goodbye to everything I had been in the past if it meant taking the burden off of Sams shoulders.

But, unfortunately now was not that time.

He noticed my gawking and looked down at me. "You ok, kiddo?"

"Yeah." I gave a weak smile. I definitely was not a lovey dovey, chick flick watching sort of girl, but I had to resist hugging him. Despite his flaws he was trying his best to make things right which was admirable.

Finally the low rumble of the impalas engine pulled up in front of the coroner, and we climbed in.

Dean immediately held up two fast food bags, giving a cheeky grin before driving back to the motel.

Once there we piled around the table and as Dean and I ate our burgers, Sam munched on his rabbit food, aka a salad.

"Ok, so-" Sam said. "The bodies had no wounds, except for the puncture marks. Blood-loss was the cause of death. What did you find out at the police station?"

"Not much." Dean chugged down a few full mouth fulls of coke. "The bodies were all dumped pretty close to one another." He pointed to a map that had been circled off. "This area isn't residential, it's near a movie theater and empty strip mall. The bodies were in a field about five blocks away from there." He shrugged. "What we know so far is that some dude is playing the literal version of Elimi-date- Lures the women in with a personals add, drains them of blood, presumably drinking said blood, and he dumps his victims near an empty strip mall."

"Considering the puncture marks." Sam went on. "If I had to guess, I would say we're dealing with a Djinn."

"Djinn?" I sat up. "I've heard of them, but never encountered one. How are they taken down?"

"Silver knife dipped in lambs blood... _Yummy_." Dean sneered.

"Any ideas on how to get the guy? Djinns are out of my elements, so I don't know how to track them."

My pocket began to vibrate and I pulled my phone, wondering who the heck would be calling me. When I noticed it was from Cas my eyebrows arched.

"Who is it?" Dean asked.

"It's Cas."

"Cas? Since when does he call your phone?" Dean frowned slightly, I think it hurt his feelings.

I pushed accept after, quite maturely might I add, sticking my tongue out at Dean.

"Hey, Cas."

"Lara. Where is your exact location? I can't hone in on you." He said with his usual monotone voice.

"Highlands Ranch Colorado. Daisy Hill Motel, room 4b." I heard silence after that, and I lowered my phone only to see that he had poofed into the room.

"Where the hell have you been, dude?" Dean asked. "You just took off and didn't say anything."

"I was..." He paused, seeming to catch himself. "That is not of import."

"Way to make me feel better, man." Dean inhaled the last of his burger.

"So you never answered my question." I went on, awkwardly trying to avoid Cas' staring. "How are you gonna track down this Djinn?"

Dean grabbed the newspaper and held it up, showing off the personals column.

"_You're _going to call the bastard up and arrange a date." He said with a smile.

"What?" Sam scrunched his brows. "You want to send our sister on a date with a blood-sucking monster?"

"What, _no_?" Deans face was a combination of smiling and guilt. "That would be crazy, and not something... OK, yes. She just needs to call him up- And we'll be there when she goes to meet him. It will be perfectly safe."

"I'm not a hooker, Dean. And I was used as bait the last time. I think it's your turn."

"Don't have lady parts, genius. That wouldn't work."

"And forgive me for dissing your incredibly stupid plan." I pointed to the paper. "But there are nearly a dozen adds listed. How do we know which one is the right guy?"

He took my phone and held it up as well. "Start dialing, sweetheart."

Scowling bitterly, I crossed my arms over my chest in a defiant pout.

"She does fit the description of every other woman that's been murdered." Sam said with reluctance. "Brunette, petite."

"Not ugly." Dean interrupted.

"Gee, thanks." I let out a sigh. "Alright fine. I'll do it. But I swear, if he takes a bite out of me I'll shoot the both of you in the face."

"Sounds fair." Sam said.

* * *

I called all of the numbers listed. Eight were skeevy perverts, but clearly not our guy, which left two more that could potentially be our monster. I had to arrange dates with both. One wanted to meet at a coffee shop, the second wanted to meet at a small bar downtown.

The first guy was a middle aged accountant with wiry gray hair and thick glasses. Despite never having seen a woman in his life I figured, he was innocent. And the second man I hadn't yet met.

I tried to ignore the way Sam and Dean were staring at me from the front seat. Both were trying to suppress laughter, and I myself wasn't exactly too pleased with the situation either.

I looked like an idiot. This was the most makeup I had ever worn in my life, the first dress I had warn since I was at least seven, and the only time I had ever fixed my hair. But I had to look the part.

"We're here." Dean announced, stopping a block or so away from the bar. "Remember, go inside, stay close to the door and wait for us."

"I hate you both so much right now." I said, and climbed out of the car.

They watched me walk up to the entrance of the bar and I gave the signal, which was scratching my left ear, that there was at least one man sitting alone at a table. Since I had no description of this guy, I was to go inside and wait for him to find me. So, that's what I did.

I entered the bar and sat down at the nearest table to the door, positioning myself that I could see perfectly who came in or out. When the waitress approached I ordered a girly drink- As so advised by Dean. Which was a peach daiquiri. My purse vibrated and after a quick glance at the text, I saw it was from Sam.

_All good in there? _He asked.

_For the moment. He's a no show so far._

_Cas and I are right outside, Dean is watching the back- So if he shows up he won't be able to get out._

_That's comforting._ I noticed the door open as a man stepped in, he looked straight at me and smiled. _Show time._

I tossed my phone back in my purse and eyed this guy up and down. He was dressed pretty nicely actually with a black suit and matching fedora. A little old fashioned but it didn't matter. He approached the table and removed his hat exposing dirty blonde hair.

"Sarah?" He asked- Which was the alias I had given him on the phone.

"Hi. You're Christian?" I tried to give a sincere smile but it was difficult.

"That I am." He sat down across from me, making himself comfortable. "You know- You're much prettier than I thought you would be."

Typical line, it almost made me snort- But I held it back.

"Thanks, so I'll just say this straight out. This isn't something I usually do, you know- Answering adds in the personals..."

"So if you're nervous, you don't want me to think badly of you?" He smiled and for some reason it made me shudder.

I hated to think this guy was decent looking, it left a bitter taste on my tongue and a burning hole in my stomach. But, he wasn't bad. His eyes were a nice shade of blue, but there was something harsh about them. I figured it was because he was looking at me as if I was his dinner.

"So why don't you tell me a little about yourself, Sarah." He said, when the waitress came over he waved her away.

"Well, there's not really much to tell. I'm a veterinary assistant, originally from Salt Lake City Utah. I have three sisters and I moved here about two years ago." I took a sip of my daiquiri, it was disgusting.

"Wow..." He crossed his leg over the other and sat back. "You're good."

My eyes darted across the bar and back. "Excuse me?"

"When I asked for you to tell me about yourself. I didn't want the story you had concocted. I wanted the truth, Lara." I went stiff when he said my name. "I wanted to hear about your life growing up, where you've been hiding, your brothers- And most importantly your Mother." By now the color had all but drained from my face. "Oh, I know what you're thinking now. Oh, no, Satan is sitting in front of me, but you really don't need to be afraid. I'm not going to hurt you."

My eyes kept moving to the doors, and I hoped that my brothers wouldn't be stupid enough to come inside.

"Lucifer." I said. "I guess I shouldn't be all that surprised."

"But you are." He smiled. "That look on your face is pretty priceless." His eyes shifted to my purse. "Go ahead. Call them, tell your brothers that I'm in here. Not that it would really do any good- They can't hurt me. But don't worry, I have no intentions of slaughtering your brothers. Sam especially, since he's my vessel."

"Why are you here?" Not that I didn't already know. It was pretty obvious.

"I wanted to say hello, and let you know that I know where to find you. You're probably thinking that I'm going to stuff you in a sack and kidnap you, but I'm not." His eyes darkened. "Not yet, anyhow."

"What's stopping you? It's not as though I could put up a fight."

"True." He sat comfortably in his chair, with his elbows on the table. "But it's not time for that just yet. Unfortunately there are some things I need to do first, and they can't wait. You know, the apocalypse and all that. It requires a lot of work."

"So I don't suppose you're going to tell me why you want me so badly?"

"You already know."

"Do I?"

"More or less. You've gained my attention because of who your Mother happened to be." He sighed. "A little pesky actually, you're being a seraphim. But, also beneficial to me. We shouldn't have any problems if you only cooperate."

"Don't count on that happening anytime soon." If he was going to kill me, then so be it. At least I wouldn't have to worry about whatever plans he had for me.

"I expected you to be as stubborn as Sam. It runs in the family apparently." He leaned forward and gave a crooked smile. "So I'll tell you exactly what I told him. You will say yes, you will. It's inevitable."

Say yes to what? To cooperation? Like hell I would ever do that.

"I should go." He said. "I'm glad we got to have this little chat, Lara. It's put my mind to rest actually. And also, I know what brought you here to this town. That little Djinn problem. If I were you, I would just forget about that and leave. So I heard, there are demons afoot- And not demons that are sided with me, which means it will be big problems for you. I suggest fleeing."

He winked at me and was suddenly gone, and I struggled to breathe. By the time I partially snapped out of it, I realized my phone was buzzing like crazy. With shaky hands I scooped it out of my purse and noticed I had five missed texts from Sam and three from Dean. Instead of responding, I left a twenty on the table to pay for my drink, grabbed my purse and jacket and wobbly walked out onto the street.

Once I hit the outdoors a warm breeze smacked me in the face. Normally it would have been comforting, but it only gave me chills.

"Lara!" I heard Dean shout, followed by his galloping footsteps. He reached me before Sam or Cas since they were in the car. "What happened? Where's the guy?"

Sam came next, and lied his hand on my shoulder. "Are you ok? Did he hurt you?"

I shook my head, trying to process everything. I knew I was scaring the shit out of them, but I just needed to take a moment to gather my thoughts.

"Dude, speak. Say something." Dean shook me slightly. "What the hell happened? Was it our monster?"

"No." I looked up just in time to see Cas standing in front of me. "It was Lucifer."


	12. Chapter 12

"So let me get this straight." Dean said as he sped out of town. "Lucifer has pretty much been keeping track of us by the jobs we're taking?" He looked at me from the rear view mirror. "Is that right?"

"That's what it sounded like to me." I tried to wipe the makeup off my face with a tissue. "Obviously it started with Malphas. He said that he knows where we are now and how to keep track of us, so..."

"He knew we wouldn't be able to resist." Sam sighed. "He's probably been watching us this entire month."

"Maybe even longer than that. Son of a bitch knows what'll make us tick." Dean turned a sharp right, and I was practically slammed into Cas. "What the hell are we supposed to do now? Just stop hunting?"

"What other choice do we have? He obviously has spies everywhere- And any job we might be lured to is pretty much just leaving a trail of breadcrumbs for Lucifer to follow." Sams shoulders were tensed. "We gotta figure out a way to take him out... Now."

"You think?" Dean glared at him. "Well if anyone has any ideas, spit em out. Cause I sure as hell don't have any."

No one had any... It was the devil we were talking about- Not some little ghost or vamp. They were easy to take care of. Torch the bones, chop off the head, simple enough. But how does one kill Satan?

"Maybe it was a bad idea after all that I came and found you two." I said. "I'm only going to cause more issues."

"Shut your cake hole- No you're not." Dean snapped. "Lucifer would be after us regardless if you were here, since he wants Sam. At least with us all together it'll be easier to watch each others backs. So don't even think about taking off, got it?"

I said nothing and returned my attention to the scenery whizzing past. Dean was wrong, if we separated it would make it more difficult for Lucifer to keep track of us. I would go one way, Sam and Dean would go the other. It would be much simpler for me to hide myself considering that somehow, even before I met Cas and he engraved my ribs with Enochian sigils, Lucifer couldn't find me.

"Cas." Dean glanced over his shoulder quickly, then returned his eyes to the road. "Please tell me you got something, man?"

"The only thing I can think of is possibly speaking with an archangel. Raphael and Michael are of course out of the question."

"Then... Who? Gabriel?" Sam shifted in his seat and eyeballed the angel in the backseat.

"He would be the only reasonable choice."

"At least we know he might not nuke us." Dean said. "But, that doesn't mean he's any more fun to be around. I swear to god, if he sticks us in tv-land, or fucks with us one more time, his feathery ass is mine!"

"_If _we can even come in contact with Gabriel." Cas went on. "It doesn't mean he'll have a way to help us."

"Gotta start somewhere. And if it means calling up heavens most annoying archangel, then I guess we gotta do it."

"What else did Lucifer say?" Sam asked, unlike Dean he had kept his tone calm. I suppose to keep _me _calm.

"Only that he expected me to cooperate with him."

"Cooperate? With what?" Dean kept his eyes more on the rear view mirror than the road.

"I think he meant not to put up a fight whenever the time comes he decides to come and take me."

"Yeah, like that's gonna happen. What a cocky bastard, he thinks he just do _whatever _he wants."

"Uh." Sam snickered. "He kinda can, Dean. He's the devil, remember?"

"Whatever. Well, I don't know how the three of you feel, but I sure as hell don't plan on bowing down to that dick-hole anytime soon."

"No one wants to bow down to him, Dean." I said. "He thought he could intimidate me today, but it didn't work. If anything it's only pissed me off more."

"Good girl." Dean smiled. "Ok, Cas. You think it wouldn't hurt to talk to Gabriel, so. I guess that's what we'll do. Now, how do we find him?"

"You don't. If anyone could somehow lure him out of his hiding space it would be me, not you."

"Then get to investigating, Cojack. It's not like we have a lot of time here."

Cas let out a sigh, and passed a glance at me. I could tell he was trying to tell me something but since I couldn't exactly read minds, I didn't know what it was. Instead of elaborating he poofed away.

"In the mean time, what do we do now? Are we going to ignore any jobs that come along?" I asked.

Dean and Sam exchanged looks.

"Not on your life." Dean answered.

"If we did that, then Lucifer wins." Sam added.

"Maybe so. I suppose we'll just have to deal with him knowing where we are." I rested back against the seat and stared out the window.

Somehow I had a feeling that things were going to get even more ugly, and pretty damn soon.

* * *

We ended up driving for ten hours straight before finally deciding to stop. Dean wanted to get as far away from Highlands Ranch as possible, hoping that maybe for the moment we would have lost Lucifer.

Cas hadn't returned, which meant he was still searching for Gabriel. I had never met this guy, but from what I had heard about him, he wasn't exactly the most cuddly little angel. He had given my brothers problems from the get-go, pretending to be a Trickster- Forcing them to endure the hell of tv-land, and Sam having to relive Deans death everyday. Whenever the day came that I would meet this douche, I would have to resist kicking him in the coin-purse- Because he might have been the only person we could turn to for help.

By the time we found a motel and stepped into the room, I collapsed onto the closest bed- My head was pounding and I still felt sick to my stomach. The more I thought about everything, the more I began to wonder how long I could keep it from my brothers.

They did have a right to know about me, but- How exactly would I go about telling them? You don't just blurt that kind of news out, there needed to be a perfect moment. There needed to be preparation. But I knew that the longer I delayed the more angry they would be. I had learned from Sam personally that keeping secrets from Dean was the biggest mistake you could ever make- Because if he found out on his own, and he most definitely would, you would have hell to pay. Sam however would be far more understanding. It was just in his nature. If, and that was a big fat _if_, I decided to tell them about myself, then I would definitely go to Sam first. Maybe he could help soften the blow? Maybe he could give me some kind of advice on how to do it?

No one even bothered mentioning dinner, which should have been eaten at least three hours ago. Instead we passed out asleep.

When I heard my phone vibrating on the bedside table, I barely cracked one eye open to see that it was 3 am, and Sam and Dean were both sound asleep in the bed next to me.

I already knew who it would be calling me. Besides Bobby and my brothers, I had no other contacts but Cas- So I wasn't the least bit surprised to see it was him.

"Hello?" I said as quietly as possible.

"Where are you?"

"Dude, you really need to learn when to call and when not to call. It's 3 in the fucking morning."

"My apologies. I'll call back at first light."

"No, don't bother. I'm awake now. We're in St. Louis Missouri, Fairbank motel, room-" I paused and grabbed the key from the nightstand. "Room 14."

I hanged up knowing he was already somewhere in the dark room and tossed my phone back on the nightstand. Since I had been jolted awake I knew I would never fall back to sleep, so I sat up and kicked the covers off my legs.

Cas was sitting at the table by the window, as if he had been there all along.

"Any luck?" I asked, still trying to keep my voice down.

"No. Gabriel knows how to keep himself hidden."

I sleepily walked over to the table and sat down, taking a drink of one of the boys left over water.

"Are you going to keep trying?"

"It would probably be best." He stared off into the darkness.

"Why do I sense a but, coming?"

"But-" He went on. "I'm not sure if it's wise to be absent for such long periods of time."

"Why not?"

"Even though you consider it to be an uncomfortable topic of conversation, Lara- It's because you're the very last Seraphim to exist, and it would be foolish of me to leave. You must be protected."

"Dude." I motioned for him to lower his voice. "Don't go spouting that crap, they'll hear you."

He leaned over slightly past the wall that partially blocked the view of the beds.

"They're asleep."

"Still... That's not something you announce to an entire frickin room. Especially when I said that I didn't want it mentioned again." He seemed unmoved by that statement, and I let out a sigh. "But, since you're the one that brought it up... What exactly can you tell me about them?"

"The Seraphim?"

"No, the Beatles- Of course the serpahim. Seeing is that they're all extinct and I have no choice but to be the last one, I should at least know what they were like."

He tilted his head in thought. "They were unique creatures, not only in abilities but appearances as well. Of course this is only what I've been told. I never seen them myself."

"How were they so different in appearance?"

"They had six wings instead of two, and they appeared to be human despite that physical trait- Which is why it would be so easy for your Mother to blend in on earth."

Six wings? Kind of overdoing it a little weren't you god?

"So, instead of having to resort to a human vessel, they could just come on down and immediately blend in. That must have been handy." I tried to imagine how one could actually fit six wings on their back. It sounded impossible, and not exactly something that _wouldn't _gain unwanted attention. "One thing confuses me. You said that they were created for the purpose of being weapons, and that they were even more powerful than archangels. If that's so, then how did they manage to get themselves slaughtered?"

Cas frowned slightly. "They were completely obedient to their orders, and their orders were to never enter combat unless God commanded it. Even if their lives were in danger, they were to never take up arms."

"Wow... Kind of... Stupid."

"Unfortunate is more like it. Sauriel however seemed to have found a way to avoid execution for centuries without fighting. Which is admirable."

"I wonder why she ended up being outsmarted by Michael. Maybe it was a coverup so he wouldn't find out about me?"

"It's a possibility. The answer to that might be in the journal."

I shoved the hair out of my face. "_That _is staying right where it is. I don't want to read it."

"That decision is completely up to you." Almost as if he had read my mind from earlier, he looked to the boys. "Have you reconsidered telling them about this?"

"Not yet. And you don't need to lecture me. I'm well aware the _extreme _repercussions of keeping secrets from Dean, but... I'm not ready yet."

"I understand." He wasn't finished, so I waited for it. "When Dean learned of Sams lies and betrayal, it..."

"No lectures." I interrupted. "I'll tell them, I will. But only after I've had the time to adjust myself."

"What are you afraid will happen?"

How would I explain that? Somehow I didn't think he would understand. He could be so emotionless at times, I really didn't think it would register. To him, it was a good thing that I was born this way, he probably considered it an honor.

"When Sam made his mistakes with the demon blood, and all that- He told me that Dean just couldn't get over it... For a really long time, and they even went their separate ways for a while. Sam said he called him a monster, that he wasn't even human anymore. I guess I'm just worried if Dean finds out what I am, he won't look at me in the same way again."

"This is an entirely different situation. Sam was drinking demon blood and broke the final seal to set Lucifer free. You are a celestial being, one of Gods creations."

"Yeah, and we all know how Dean feels about angels, Cas. I mean, other than you- He hates them, he thinks they're dicks." I stood and gulped down the last of the water. "I'm gonna try to get some more sleep. Seeya in the morning..." I stopped before lying down. "Don't watch me sleep."

He smirked slightly and I knew he wasn't going to honor that request.


	13. Chapter 13

A week went by, then two and eventually three- And still things were the same as they had been. We took jobs whenever they came around, drove all over the frickin country, and throughout Cas was still trying to find Gabriel. Thankfully Lucifer hadn't decided to pay another visit, but that didn't mean I was any more comfortable. He was still watching us I was sure, and would continue to do so. Then another three weeks passed and as I was approaching the third month of being with Sam and Dean, things felt as normal as they possibly could. I mean, if you discount the angry spirits, wendigos, demons and whatever sort of monster we encountered. But, I suppose that is what was normal for freaks like us, so it worked.

Our latest job was another pesky demon, which Dean got into his head he wanted to interrogate. He had become obsessed with finding out why Lucifer wanted to take me, and this was probably the fourth demon in the last month he had questioned. By questioned, I mean, drown in holy water until the shrieking asshole finally caved.

It didn't seem to be going so well this time around, though. This demon, who had possessed a forty something housewife, just wasn't talking. Her frizzy blonde hair was drenched in holy water, blood and mounded clumps of salt, and she was shaking. But it didn't matter, she didn't seem to care how much pain she had to endure- Her lips wouldn't move.

"She's hiding something." Dean whispered to Sam and I. "She knows and she's not talkin."

We were huddled in a corner inside an old warehouse where the demon bitch was stuck. The trap was spray painted in the middle of the floor, and as usual- The demon was tied to a chair in the center of it.

"We can't keep going." Sam retorted. "We need to take her out and start moving, before her screaming attracts attention."

"I'm with Sam on this one." I said, even though so far no demon we had interrogated knew anything about me, I didn't want to take the chance of coming across one who did. "Can't we just exorcise her already and get the hell out?"

"What's with you two?" Dean did his usual confused face. "Aren't either of you curious to know why Lucifers chasing you?"

I huffed. "Of course, Dean- But I also want to avoid death, or the police. It would be different if we were in a completely secluded area, but we're not. Yes, this warehouse might be empty, but the businesses on the street aren't."

"Five more minutes." Dean held up his fingers, then pushed past us and returned to the circle.

The only thing Sam and I could do was follow and observe. Of course the option of hitting Dean over the head and stuffing him in the trunk of the Impala was a tempting thought.

Dean went back to splashing the demon with holy water, and she yet again started screaming.

"You have five minutes to start talking you ugly piece of crap." He said. "Why does Lucifer want my sister?"

"Fuck you!" Was her eloquent reply, after which Dean punched her in the face.

"Four minutes, then we send your ass straight back to hell."

"It doesn't matter why! But it's going to happen."

"Why?" When she didn't respond, yet again Dean punched her in the face. "Answer me, why?"

"Because she's important! Do you have any idea how drastically things will have turned in our favor if he has her?" The woman let out a throaty laugh. "She's more important than your precious little brother."

Oh shit... This woman actually knew about me. This wasn't going to end well. Obviously I was beginning to panic as my stomach felt like it dropped to my feet. Sam noticed my squirming and only stared at me in confusion.

"Dean." I said, trying not to voice my panic. "We're running out of time. We need to get outa here."

The demon smirked at that, and she didn't speak another word.

Five minutes later the demon was exorcised and the unconscious housewife was left on the steps of the nearest hospital. Dean was clearly pissed as we raced out of town and to an old house which we had been been squatting in.

Sam was unusually quiet as we drove, even ignoring Deans jabs and name calling, not to mention his questions. There was an obvious tension building in the car, and I couldn't explain why. When we got to the house Dean dumped Sam and I out and then took off. I knew where he was going- To wherever the closest bar happened to be.

We both watched the cars tail lights disappear in the darkness before Sam let out a sigh.

"Ok, so- Are you going to tell me what the hell that was about back there?"

I shrugged nonchalantly, trying to give off the illusion of innocence. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb, Lara. I saw your face back there when that demon was talking. You looked freaked out of your mind. Believe me, I know a thing or two about keeping secrets and what it can do to a person- Now tell me what's going on."

The difference between Sam and Dean is that, since Dean was so overly protective- Telling him about this would somehow fall back to his blaming himself for it. Even though he had no control over who my Mother was, what I was, somehow still he would blame himself. Sam, while protective in his own way, was also more level-headed. It was inevitable, I knew I was backed into a corner and the only way out would be to spill the truth.

So, I told him. I told him everything. From the book John had given me and ordered to keep hidden, to the night Cas went and got that book and read its contents. Every little deep dark secret I wanted to keep hidden I spilled in a deluge of words, all of which ran together like verbal soup. And through out the moments of honestly Sam never once let the concern fade from his eyes. Eventually though, the concern _was_ replaced with shock- But what I expected to see there wasn't, which was anger or disgust. After I finished, everything was silent, but for the cars driving by.

"Cas is the only other one that knows about this?" He asked.

"For the moment, yeah. Well, Lucifer knows of course. And Zachariah."

He pushed his long hair out of his eyes. "This is big, Lara. This is huge. Why didn't you tell us a month ago?"

"I wanted to. I really did, but I couldn't."

"I know what you're thinking. You think Dean is going to freak out and try to disown you or some crap. But he won't." He shook his head, smiling. "Lara, this is a good thing. It doesn't have to be a curse."

"Easy for you to say, it's not you. And it is a bad thing because the devil wants to use me somehow."

"Yeah, that's the niche in this thing. He must think that he can manipulate you to be some kind of weapon. I don't know what other reason he would have." He put his arm around me and pulled me into a hug, which surprised me. "If you want me to keep this a secret, I will. But one of these days you're gonna have to tell him. Believe me, you don't want him somehow finding out on his own."

I already knew that- But actually uttering those words to Dean was harder in my opinion than ripping your own arm out of its socket. Dean was definitely team human, and not anything in between, at least when it concerned his family. It was still a surprise to me that he considered Cas a friend.

We headed inside and flicked on the lanterns scattered around the room, the remnants of our dinner was still lying in random areas. Mine was a half eaten club sandwich, Sam actually had something other than a salad and ate ham on rye. It was a nice change to the usual greasy fast food or e-coli infested, cockroach diner crap. It was a small deli, and word on the streets it had the best sandwiches in the world. I was inclined to agree.

Sam had successfully tapped into the neighbors wi-fi, and was now clicking around on his laptop. I didn't know what he was looking at half the time, but at least it wasn't porn. You don't know how disturbing it is to wake up in the middle of the night and see your oldest brother completely transfixed on a nudey website. I honestly didn't think I could ever scrub that image out of my mind, it was successfully scorched in there.

"Lara," Sam said. "I know you don't exactly want to talk about this, but- Maybe it would be a good idea if you called Cas. This might be the only chance we could get to talk about it without Dean overhearing."

"What's there to discuss?"

He laughed. "Uh, a lot. I mean, you've just dropped this bomb on me and I kind of have a few questions."

Scowling, I pulled my phone out of my jacket and dialed Cas' number. It rang a good five times before he finally picked up.

"Lara?"

"Yeah, sorry, dude- Don't know if you're busy but could you flutter on over to our location?"

"Is there trouble?"

"No, everything's cool, I guess. But, yeah. Sam wants to talk to you. If you can come, we're in Frankfort Kentucky, Ridgemont street. We're in the empty house on the corner."

I hanged up, much like I always did, without saying goodbye. It really was pointless since it took him half a second to poof to our location. Just as always he was diligent at appearing, it was fast enough that he was still holding his cell, and had stuffed it back into his trench-coat before nodding.

"Hello." He said.

"Hey, Cas." Sam smiled. "Listen, I'm just gonna say it flat out. It's about the secret you're holding of Laras."

Cas' eyes widened and he started to fidget. "I don't know what secret you're referring to."

"Cas," I held my hand up. "It's ok. He knows. I told him." I stood and shook my head. "Jeez, you turn into a nervous Nancy when you're holding a secret, what the hell?"

"Well... I'm not exactly comfortable at with-holding certain information."

"And it's obvious you suck at it." Sam laughed. "So, what can you tell me about Laras Mother?"

"Nothing. I never knew her. The Seraphim were a very obedient species and never left Gods throne unless it was completely necessary. Other than Michael and Raphael, no other angel had ever lied eyes on them."

"So you have no doubt in your mind, what so ever, that Lara is actually... _that_?" Sam seemed to have trouble saying the word as well.

"There's no reason for doubt. I knew from the beginning that there was something different about Lara, but couldn't place what it might have been. And then, after Zachariah mentioned her purification abilities..."

"Pretty much just royally screwed me over." I finished.

He mulled that over in his mind for a moment before saying. "Basically."

"Ok so if the incantation in the journal is never spoken aloud, will Lara stay the same as she is right now? Will she still be considered human?" Sam seemed to try and avoid my gazes after uttering that question.

"Unless the incantation is spoken, yes- She will remain human."

"This spell... Did that have anything to do with why you couldn't heal her?"

Cas nodded before taking a seat. "Yes, it is such a potent spell that it successfully guards against anything that might have to do with angels- In order that she would remain hidden, and any angel that might come across her, me for instance, wouldn't be able to sense anything strange."

"But, you still did... Why?" I asked.

"Because while it hides everything that tells you're a celestial being, it's also so potent it dims your soul. Which, normally wouldn't be cause for concern, quite often there are certain people whos souls don't shine as vibrantly as anothers- But, considering you're a Winchester, and both Sam and Deans are strong, I thought it strange that yours as well wouldn't be the same."

Sam and I only stared at each other. So, it was the absence of my glowing soul that had first caused Cas to suspect me. No wonder he talked about touching it to make sure it wasn't tainted.

"Huh." Sam murmured. "So that means that since you can see it, others can to, not only angels... Demons?" Cas nodded in answer. "Basically Lara is a walking sign, she might as well just paint it on her forehead."

"Wonderful." I took my head into my hands.

"How's the search for Gabriel coming?" Thankfully Sam was kind enough to drop this subject.

"I still haven't located him. I'm coming to believe it might just be simpler to summon him." Cas answered.

"Summon him?" My head shot up. "Why didn't we just do that from the beginning?"

"It's dangerous. There's a chance that someone else might hear the message I sent out."

"Someone like Zachariah." Sam rolled his eyes. "But, it might be worth it to actually talk to the guy. When do you wanna do it?"

Cas glared around the room, only then seeming to notice we were one brother short. "Where's Dean?"

"At a bar, where else?" I answered.

"I would advise not summoning him until we're all present."

Sam grabbed his cell. "Then I'll just call him."

* * *

Of course Dean wasn't happy about being pulled away from the bar, and the random chick he was trying to hook up with. But, he calmed down slightly once he realized that we were going to try and summon Gabriel.

Castiel went through the trouble of basically angel proofing the house, claiming it would keep any one else that might have been flying by from suspecting anything- But not to the extreme where we couldn't even get Gabriel inside. The last thing he did before reciting some sort of chant was pouring a ring of the holy oil onto the floor. Sam and Dean both didn't think it would be the best idea to trap Gabriel inside of it, stating that the last time they did it- He wasn't exactly thrilled. But, they didn't want him to run away before we could get some answers out of him.

As we waited, Dean had his lighter in his hand, ready to flick it on and ignite the oil- While the rest of us stood a few decent feet away.

From what I had heard Gabriel wasn't subtle, at all. After all, someone that could create an alternate reality where my brothers were the stars in tv-shows... Yeah... This Gabriel definitely had an imagination. I halfway expected the house we stood in to be turned into a castle, a puffy white cloud, or some other nonsense. But nothing happened. For nearly ten minutes we stood in silence waiting, until Dean cleared his throat.

"Uh... You sure you called the right angel?"

"Of course." Cas replied, moving to stand beside me. "But he does have the option of declining our invitation."

"After the last time," Sam said. "It wouldn't surprise me if he told us to go screw ourselves."

"Hey, you don't stick us in friggin tv and fuck around with us and not expect a little bitch slap in return." Dean closed his lighter. "Us trapping him in holy fire was tame compared to what I would have rather done."

"Well if you ask me-" I said. "It seems like this guy has a pretty..."

My words cut off when I looked up and noticed I was no longer standing in that old empty house, instead I was now in the middle of what looked like a large and very empty office building.

"What the hell?" I turned a small circle and noticed Cas as well was there, looking just as confused. "What happened?"

Cas took in the surroundings. There were floor to ceiling windows, boxy leather furniture, a dull gray carpet and a receptionist desk behind us, which no one sat behind. The phones however, were ringing off the hook.

"Gabriel." Cas said. "He's done this."

Off to the right were a set of elevators, one was currently on the move, the numbers of each floor lighting up as it descended to the ground level where Cas and I stood. With a ding the doors slid open and a man dressed in a nice navy suit stepped out. His hair was slicked back away from his face, which held a cocky smirk.

"Cassie!" The man said, smiling an obnoxious sort of grin and walked over with open arms. Once he caught site of me however he stopped. "Uh-oh. Looks like someone was standing too close when I pulled you here."

"Where is this place, Gabriel?" Cas actually sounded annoyed.

"Hang on a second, bro." He held his finger up in the air and moved past him. "And who might you be? You smell like a Winchester, but you certainly don't have that piss me off trait that makes me want to punch a baby."

"Uh..." I garbled. "I'm their sister?"

"Well that's no good. I feel sorry for anyone related to those two douche-nuggets. Sorry about zapping you here, but I guess you were standing too close to my brother. Lesson learned, never stand too close to an angel, "He winked. "You never know when they might go off. Can't say I'm _too _disappointed, you're much better eyecandy." He turned back to Cas, and I scowled. "Ok, so. You summoned me, and I'm a busy guy and don't have all day. What do you want?"

Cas never lost the confused baby face. "You were the only one we thought to ask on what to do about Lucifer."

"Me? What makes you think I want to tangle with that spoiled little weiner?"

"You don't have to." I said. "We just thought maybe you could tell us how we could do it."

"You?" He eyed me up and down. "That might be worth watching. But, you wouldn't survive five minutes. Take my advice and just forget about that."

Cas moved closer. "If there is any way to kill Lucifer..."

"Kill Lucifer?" Gabriel cut him off. "You can't kill Lucifer, Cassie. If that were possible don't you think Michael would have just done that instead of locking him inside his play-pen?"

My patience was wearing thin. "Throw us a frickin bone here, man."

He turned and gave me a crooked smile. "_Now _I see the family resemblance. Ok, since you asked me so nicely, I'll say that you can't kill Lucy, and you were stupid for even thinking it, but- Putting him back in his cage is as good as it'll get." He pulled a note-pad from his jacket pocket and starting writing. "I'm giving you a grocery list of the things you'll need to open the cage. Don't say I never did anything for ya."

He tore the paper out and stuffed it down the front of my shirt, if he hadn't of been an angel I would have slapped him. I pulled the paper out and looked at it, scowling all the more.

"What the hell is this?"

"The list. You're gonna get boned even trying, so I thought..."

"Condoms?" I crumpled the paper and threw it in his face. "This isn't a joking matter you, dip-shit. Now is there a way to open the cage or are you going to just fuck with us?"

He only smirked. "Castiel. Have the horse-men rode into town yet?"

"They were released, but we haven't seen any signs of their presence." He answered.

"Well you better sniff them out. Cause if you want to open the cage, you need their rings to do it." He started writing on another piece of paper, when he stuffed that one down the front of my shirt he nodded. "That's what you need to say to open the door after you have the rings of course."

I looked at the paper and was relieved to see it was actually something written that could be useful. Although, not english, at least I could read it.

"Ok, so I helped. Can I go now?" Gabriel smiled.

"How could we get Lucifer into the cage?" Cas asked.

"That's your problem, bro- Not mine. You want to embark on this crazy roller-coaster ride, go right ahead. Me? I'll be basking somewhere sunny and tropical with senoritas massaging me and fanning me with palm branches. This is your war, not mine."

"Before you go." I grabbed his arm, not even thinking that he had every capability of blowing me to smithereens. "Where are we anyways?"

"Chicago. Have fun driving back." He smiled and then vanished.

"Wow... What a dick." I said.

Cas walked over and took the paper from my hand, reading over what was written. He then folded it neatly and stuffed it in his pocket.

"You think he was lying?"

He shook his head. "Gabriel might be a lot of things, but a liar isn't one of them. I believe we can trust him."

"Well, let's hope so anyways. Can you zap us back to Kentucky?"

He nodded and lied his hand on my shoulder- After ten seconds of not being poofed back to our original location, I looked down at his hand and raised a brow. "Um. What's up?"

"Someone is stopping me." He said.

"From beaming us up? Who? Gabriel?"

"No..." His voice lowered as his hand fell from my shoulder.

Um... I waited for him to tell me who else would have done it? Seeing is that he looked about ready to crap himself I didn't figure it would have been Gabriel. When a knife suddenly slid out of his coat sleeve I fumbled.

"The frick? Where've you been keeping that?"

"Get behind me." He said, pushing me slightly until I couldn't see past his shoulders.

"Gallant and all, but don't you think it would be better if I helped fight whoever was coming?"

"No. You stand no chance of surviving if you're foolish enough to attempt to fight him."

"Then why don't we try to make a run for it instead of standing here like fish in a barrel?"

Why did this kind of shit always happen? It seems like it was so predictable you could almost laugh at it. A flutter of wings and gust of wind whipped through the large building before two figures stood in front of us.

One was an african american man, with a look in his eyes that could chill your blood. The second was Zachariah.

"Castiel." The man said. "I'm not surprised to see you here."

"Raphael." Cas said, which made my mouth fall open. "Why are you here?"

"We had a discussion." Zachariah answered. "And we decided it was best to exterminate our little pest problem before it got out of hand." He looked past Cas and at me. "That problem is you."

"Her?" Cas made it evident that he was armed. "Why?"

"She's dangerous to our kind, Castiel. Just like her ancestors, we need to be rid of them." Raphael brought out his own shiny knife.

"She's just a human, how is she so dangerous?"

"Human now, walking nuke later." Zach said. "Just stand aside, Castiel- There's no need for you to die too."

Not budging an inch was Cas' reply to that, which didn't seem to concern either angel standing in front of him. Within seconds the fight began and as Raphael came at Cas, he reached behind and shoved me across the room.

Thankfully, this time I didn't crash into a wall and break a rib, I landed on one of the leather sofas. Cas had a nice aim.

I rolled off onto the floor, reaching into my jacket and pulled out the only weapon I had on me, which was my pistol. It wouldn't do much good as far as killing angels went, but I hoped it could distract them or at least slow them down. I aimed at Raphael, squeezing the trigger twice as two bullets lodged into his shoulder. It was as if I just grazed him with a feather, he didn't seem to notice and continued swinging his blade. Cas dodged the blows somehow, swiping his own blade at Raphael. Each man though seemed equally skilled at avoiding being hit, and during all of this Zachariah was no where to be seen.

My eyes scaled the large room looking for the balding bastard, leave it to him to wimp out and flee to avoid getting his ass kicked. My attention was broken as Cas went soaring through the air and crashed into a glass topped coffee table beside me. Raphael charged so I brought my pistol up and shot again, the bullet splat right between his eyes which caused him to stumble.

Within seconds Cas was back on his feet and the table was a busted and broken mess beneath him. I grabbed one of the legs which was sharp and jagged and started swinging, hoping I would get lucky and knock the assholes head clean off his shoulders. Bullets apparently weren't affecting him, so what other choice did I have?

I hurled the broken objects at him, they hit him of course, but did no good. My gun was useless, inanimate objects were useless, so pretty much _I _was useless. But I didn't want to be like one of those helpless girls in a fight scene, that stands in the background screaming and crying like a worthless lump of nothing. So I did the one thing I could do, and probably the _stupidest_ thing I could do- I jumped into the fight full force and started throwing punches. After one punch which landed square on Raphaels chin, I jumped back and squealed, almost positive that I had broken at least one finger. That's what I get for trying to punch a friggin brick wall.

When I felt a pair of arms wrap around me from behind I let out a slight scream from the surprise. Cas quickly looked over his shoulder and noticed that Zach had me in a death grip.

He pounced.

After slashing at Zach and successfully nicking him on the forearm, he yelped and released me. But it was too late.

It only took two seconds for Raphael to take advantage of the fact that I was wide open, he came at me with his blade raised. I waited for the inevitable spray of blood and fiery hot pain, but it didn't happen. Cas suddenly poofed in front of me and grabbed Raphaels arm, deflecting the blow just enough that he didn't get knifed in the chest. However, his lower stomach did.

It was a horrible sound, the pain filled grunt and raspy breath of air. Cas collapsed in front of me, his knife slipping out of his hand and stopping at my feet.

Now I was pissed, more than pissed- I was enraged, enough so that I didn't care if it got me killed I was going to get stabby. Cas had just took the blow for me, which was something I would never ask him, or anyone, to do. I grabbed his knife and dove at the man, we both fell to the floor and rolled across it. I know I had cut him, but it wasn't a fatal blow- And by the time we stopped rolling he pulled the girliest move ever and slapped me across the face. It did knock the wind out of me, and for a moment my eyes went dark.

He stood and straightened his suit jacket.

"This has gone on long enough." He said, then raised his hand.

Cas shouted something, but I couldn't make out the words- And after Raphael snapped his fingers, I expected it to be over. I figured the better part of my intestines would be nothing but mince-meat. But, nothing happened. I was fine...

Raphaels brows met together, the shock apparent on his features. He snapped his fingers a second time, still nothing.

I couldn't help but sneer as I raised the blade and lunged at him again, but he was suddenly gone. Both he and Zachariah had vanished.

For a moment I had to stand there and be certain they weren't going to come back, and once I decided they weren't- I dropped the knife and ran towards Cas, who was sprawled on the floor trying his best to prop himself up with his right arm.

I pushed his coat aside and noticed the puncture wound, which was bloody- And that's not all. There was a bright white light shining forth from the gaping hole, which I covered over with my wadded up jacket.

"What do I do? Do I take you to a hospital?" I asked, panicking.

"No." He tried to push himself up but collapsed. "There's nothing to be done but wait for it to..." Coughing fit. "Heal."

"Shit..." I reached down and helped him to his feet. He couldn't support all of his weight, so I threw his arm around my shoulders and helped. "We gotta get out of here before those bastards decide to come back."

We hobbled to the front entrance of the building, which doors were locked. I ended up having to sit Cas aside while I threw a chair through the glass. Afterwards we stepped outside, which was completely pitch black but for a few lights in the empty parking lot. The area around the building was tall trees, a parking garage and a few more small buildings. Past that was the road, which led into the city.

We started walking, as Cas struggled to stay conscious.

"Don't pass out on me, at least not until I find a car." I said.

He gurgled something incoherent in response.

We ended up having to walk to the parking garage, since the lot was empty- Thankfully inside the garage there was a box truck... Only a box truck. Not my first choice as far as vehicles goes, but it would better than walking.

"Just lay here for a second." I lied Cas down next to the truck.

Thankfully the dumb-ass driver left the drivers side door unlocked, so I climbed up and unlocked the passenger side. It took nearly five minutes to help Cas up into the truck, and afterwards I closed the door and hopped in.

Ok, this wasn't my proudest moment- It was like Grand Theft Auto up in there as I hot wired the truck, except I didn't have to beat up any prostitutes. Yeah, it wasn't like me to steal vehicles, or hot-wire them, but my stay at Bobbys as a kid I had lesson 101 on stealing cars. It took a couple minutes before the diesel engine fired up and I cranked it in reverse.

Cas was slumped over in his seat, his hand was pressing against his wound.

"Are you sure there's nothing I can do about that? Are you going to be ok?"

"I will be." His voice was weak. "It's not a fatal wound."

"Well we gotta do something. At least find a motel or something for you to rest."

We stopped at a stop sign and I started searching through my pocket. I had my credit cards and a small wad of cash, thankfully we could actually afford a room somewhere. When I reached into my jacket that he still held to find my cell, I remembered that I had left it back at the house. After violating Cas' coat while he was half unconscious, I pulled out his phone to see it was smashed from his cat-fight.

Typical.

"Stay awake, Cas. I don't know what to do for a wounded angel. I don't know if you falling asleep will be dangerous."

"It won't..." His head drooped.

"But there's light pouring out of that wound." I looked over noticing him going out, I nudged him with my elbow. "Wake up, Cas."

He jumped slightly and coughed up a mouthful of blood. "My vessel is damaged, there's nothing to be done but to let it heal."

He passed out after that, and no amount of my yelling or shaking him would wake him up. He was breathing, which was a good thing- But I had no idea what pulse would be normal for an angel, or even if they had a pulse at all. I really needed to bring out my angel manual and study up after this.

I drove around for nearly an hour before coming across a motel. I was hesitant to leave Cas lying in the truck while I went inside to get our room, but didn't have a choice. Even if he was awake, he wouldn't have been able to come inside.

After getting the room key, I hopped back in the truck and drove to the door. When I climbed out and opened Cas' side, I climbed up and started shaking him.

"Cas... Wake up..." I lightly smacked him on the cheek. "I can't carry you inside. I'm not that strong, comon wake up."

His eyes opened halfway. "Where are we?"

"At a motel. You're gonna sleep this off."

I had a difficult time lugging him out of the truck, and we ended up falling onto the hard asphalt. After cursing to myself, I pulled him back up and we somehow made into the room.

After he collapsed onto the bed, I took a moment to catch my breath.

He was out cold again- And I knew that I needed to get rid of the box-truck before it gained attention from a cop.

It took me twenty minutes to drive the truck to a ditch, park it, and jog back to the motel. When I stepped back inside Cas was in the same spot I had left him.

Now I went for the phone, and dialed Deans number. It didn't even finish ringing once before he picked up.

"Hello?"

"Ugh, Dean, thank god." I said.

"Lara, where the hell are you? What happened?"

"Too long to explain now. We're in Chicago at the Riverside motel. Come and get us."

"Where's Cas? Why can't he bring you back?"

I looked to the bed, he was sprawled with his arms out and head halfway on the pillows.

"Cas is hurt, he can't bring us back."

"Ok, we're on our way. Don't fucking go anywhere, keep the doors locked."

We hanged up and I finally sat and tried to calm down.


	14. Chapter 14

_**I'm gonna continue to thank everyone for their awesome comments. Thanks!**_

* * *

I wasn't sure how long it would take the boys to drive from Kentucky to Chicago, but knew it would be a few hours at least. In the mean time I took the opportunity to angel proof the hotel room. Since I didn't have any spray paint, I made do with a sharpie marker I found in one of the dresser drawers.

Cas didn't wake up until it started to get light- I heard him shifting on the bed which jolted me awake. Instantly I darted to him and pushed his coat aside. The light wasn't shining from the wound anymore, but he still didn't look much better.

"You awake?" I asked.

"Yes... Partly." He answered.

After tucking my arms under his I pulled him into sitting position. Now came the awkward moment.

"First of all-" I started. "Thanks for jumping in front of me like that. You could have been killed you know?"

"I know."

"Then why did you do it? Did you ever stop and think that if you ended up getting smoked, that things might have turned out a hell of a lot worse?"

"That never crossed my mind."

I let out a sigh. "What is it with everyone wanting to sacrifice themselves around here? Listen, I'm really thankful for what you did, after all- I was basically a sitting duck back there, but next time- Don't take the bullet for me, ok? I don't want to know that someone died in order to save me."

"I'm not agreeing to that arrangement." He grunted. "It isn't the first time I've been wounded trying to protect a Winchester."

"Yeah well, Sam and Dean might be all hunky dory with that, but I'm not."

"I... I don't know what that means."

"It _means_, that I don't want you getting yourself killed for me. It's not worth it."

His eyes squinted. "Of course it's worth it."

It was scary how calm he was at admitting that- And I resisted the urge to slap him. It was bad enough that Sam wanted to endanger himself, and that Dean was willing to run screaming into a burning building if it meant my not having to do it. I didn't need Cas doing it too.

"So... _Why _did you do it? It would be different if you knew me as long as my brothers, but it's only been three months. That's hardly enough time to want to throw your body on a live grenade."

"Time is irrelevant."

I sighed and moved his coat aside. "Seems like it's getting better. How long until you're fully functional?"

"A few hours and I shouldn't be as weakened. Until that time, I'm basically useless."

"You never answered my question, ya know-" I arched a brow. "Why did you do it?"

Much like he always did when he wasn't sure how to respond, his eyes shifted back and forth as though he was trying to pull an answer out of the air. When there was a knock at the door he seemed halfway relieved.

I jumped up, bringing my pistol out and slowly approached the door, taking a peak out the peep-hole.

Letting out a breath of air I pulled the door open and Dean pushed his way inside, followed by Sam.

"What the hell happened?" Dean asked, as he approached the bed. "Cas, you good?"

"I'll be fine."

"Gabriel yanked Cas here after he summoned him- I was standing to close and got pulled as well." I said.

"Ok?" Sam examined my face closely, noticing the bruise left over on my cheek from Raphael slapping me. "So Gabriel picked a fight with you?"

"No, after Gabriel left Raphael and Zachariah appeared." Cas answered.

"Raphael, as in the archangel who turned you into blood pudding?" Dean now knelt over and stared my cheek. "Why were they there? Why did they fight you?"

Luckily Dean didn't see the panicked expression I sent Cas- Cas however, looked completely clueless.

"Raphael was trying to persuade me into rejoining them." He lied, amazingly well actually. "They claimed that should I do so, that all would be forgiven."

I didn't realize I was holding my breath for so long, but after Dean fell for the lie, I felt my lungs beginning to burn.

"Well seeing is that you got shivved with an angel dagger I guess you turned them down." Dean finally allowed himself to calm down. "You feel up to getting outa here? We'll head to Bobbys, give you some more down time."

"I believe I can manage." Cas pulled himself off the bed, and although he wasn't standing upright- At least he wasn't stumbling.

"What about you, sparky? You hurt at all?" He mussed my hair.

I shook my head. "No, I'm fine. Just pissed is all."

Sam took a few steps around the small room.

"Nice artwork." He said, pointing to the sharpie angel proofing. "What did you find out from Gabriel anyways?"

Nearly jumping out of my skin, I had almost completely forgotten about what Gabby had said.

"For starters, he said that killing Lucifer isn't possible." I said, and just as Sam and Dean were getting pissed I went on. "_But_, there is a way to put him back in his cage."

"Seriously?" Sams face practically lit up. "How?"

"Yeah, dude- Lay it on us. What do we gotta do?" Dean asked.

"There is a key to Lucifers cage-" Cas answered for me. "The rings from the Four horsemen combined creates that key. If we have them, we can unlock the cage. Of course, actually luring Lucifer back into it wouldn't be..."

"Who cares!" Dean practically did a little dance. "That's just a little bump in the road. At least we know there's a way now."

"Yeah-" Sam rolled his eyes. "And how to you expect for us to actually get Lucifer to jump in it?"

"Hey, even if we have to get him to the edge and pull a 300 and kick him in, that's what we'll do." Dean mussed my hair a second time. "At least we have a plan now, something to actually look forward too instead of just running." He pulled the door open. "Let's go, Bobby's gonna shit a brick when we tell him this."

Sam and Dean led the way to the car, and before exiting from the room I stopped and gave a weak smile to Cas.

"Thanks for not telling him." I said.

He didn't exactly look happy about the lying, but nodded despite it.

"You're welcome."

* * *

It felt like a never ending drive to Bobbys this time around- And poor Cas looked completely miserable even though he claimed he was fine. To think, that had the knife been a few inches higher, he wouldn't have been sitting with us in that impala. He would have died, my brothers would have been royally pissed, and I would have to live with the guilt for the rest of my life.

I didn't want anyone taking any punches for me. My life wasn't anymore important than the next person, and the fact my brothers, and my friend, was willing to just up and die for me... Ugh, no. I wouldn't let that happen again. I refused. So, even though I knew it would make them angry- Angry enough that Dean would probably try to tie me to a chair or lock me in a closet to stop me, I was going to leave. Of course I hadn't yet explained this to the boys just yet, but... I could only hope that once I did, they wouldn't try and stop me. They would have to realize that while it might suck ass, it really was the best thing to do. Since Sam was no longer being hunted exactly, I was the only one Lucifer was after- Which meant, that I was putting the three of them in danger. If I left and just kept running on my own, at least I could rest assured that they were safe.

But, actually explaining that to my brothers, Dean especially, would be like talking to a brick wall. Sam, as I said before was more level headed. And even if he wouldn't like the thought of me going off on my own, he would respect my decision. Dean? Well, as I said, I expected to be locked in a closet. But he was just going to have to understand that I wasn't a kid- Like it or not I was an adult and I had been on my own before, I could do it again. Yeah, easier said than done. I had a feeling I would have to end up running away like a twelve year old in the middle of the night.

We were at Bobbys for a total of three days before a segment on the 6:00 news caught everyone's attention. Apparently there were some pretty odd outbreaks of swine-flu, measles, chicken-pox and other nasty illness'. Practically half of Clarksville Tennessee had been sanctioned off and quarantined.

Something of biblical proportions, according to Cas- And after discussing it for a total of ten seconds Dean concluded that it was proof of the horseman Pestilence.

Unfortunately, as Dean and Sam were readying our things for the drive- I made the mistake of telling them that after this escapade was over, I was going to go my own way.

Wanna know what happened after that? A shouting match. Dean and I cursed at each other for a good ten minutes while Sam tried to pry us apart. After pulling the old "You aren't my Father" line, he grabbed me around the waist and literally carried me back inside Bobbys and threw me on the couch.

"You're a fucking idiot!" He shouted, as everyone piled into the room to see what the hell was happening.

"Why? Why am I an idiot for wanting to keep your asses alive?!" I shrieked back.

"What's goin on?" Bobby stepped in between us even though I knew we weren't going to get physically violent.

"Lara pretty much decided, on her own, without consulting in me or Sam, that she's gonna take off." Dean huffed. "Just, roll on out on her own, all by herself. While the friggin devil is chasing her!"

"Dean." Sam tried to be the voice of reason. "I don't want her to go anymore than you do- But she has the right to make up her own mind."

"You shut up, you're just as bad as she is." Dean paused and seemed to count to ten. "Ok, here's what's gonna happen. You-" He pointed in my face. "Are going to stay here. Me and Sammy are gonna go after Pestilence."

"Wait a second." I jumped up from the couch. "You're not leaving me out of this one!"

"Oh, yes we are. Because we're gonna be up to our asses in demons and shit that wants to kill us, and I don't wanna have to worry about you taking off when my back's turned since _apparently_ I can't trust you!" He glared at Cas who was standing on the sidelines watching the scuffle in confusion. "You, you're on guard duty, you make sure she doesn't do something stupid while we're gone."

Cas looked from me to Dean. "I... I think it would be a better decision if we all went on this mission, it's going to be extremely dangerous."

"We can handle it. And if worse comes to worse then Bobby can just tie Lara to a chair and you can come blip to our rescue." He nudged Sam. "Get our crap in the car. We're leaving."

"Dean be reasonable." I begged. "The two of you can't face a frickin horseman alone. If anything you'll need Cas there."

"Sorry, sister. Next time you'll think before you announce such a stupid idea. You should know by now that we stick together, we _don't _separate."

He stomped out of the house and Sam let out a sigh. On one hand he could understand my motives, and the other, he knew better than to go against Dean and allow me to do something so stupid.

"Sorry, kiddo." He said, gave me a hug, and followed after Dean.

I stood in the doorway and watched as Dean barked out orders to poor Cas, who stood there with his eyes on the ground. Once they settled on some sort of agreement he hopped in the drivers seat, passed me pissed off look, then peeled out of the drive. Cas watched them speed away like a lost puppy before returning to the house. He stepped into the doorway and paused beside me.

"It's becoming more and more evident that you can't keep this secret from Dean much longer." He said quietly so Bobby wouldn't hear. "He suspects something."

My stomach twisted into knots and Cas merely kept on walking until he was back inside the den.

Yeah, he was pissed. I could tell. Even though his face hadn't changed and he wasn't shouting or cursing like Dean- I could tell he was angry. He didn't want to be stuck babysitting me, he would have rather went with Sam and Dean to smite Pestilence.

Perfect timing, you dumb beaver- I thought to myself. I couldn't have waited until after the mission, _nooo _I had to go and announce that I was leaving now. I was an idiot. Not only did I have my brothers pissed at me, but a frickin angel too. Wonderful, just wonderful.

I didn't figure apologizing to him would help matters much. Just as Dean, he wouldn't understand why I wanted to leave.

When I finally closed the door, Bobby was glaring at me with his arms crossed.

"You really think we would let ya take off on your own?" He asked.

I shrugged. "Well, here I thought that all of you would be willing to listen to reason."

"What reason? That ya think you'll be better off fightin this on your own?" He shook his head. "No. You stick with your family, no flyin solo."

He disappeared into the kitchen and I heard him digging through the fridge looking for a beer.

I didn't really want to feel the awkward tension between Cas and me, but I tried to ignore it as I went back into the den and sat on the sofa. He was standing in his usual spot which was beside Bobbys roll-top desk, his arms crossed and an almost stern look on his face. He didn't say a word but kept his eyes locked on me without even blinking.

The next few hours after that I felt as though I was a prisoner in Bobbys house. If I walked into the kitchen, Cas was right on my heels. If I just decided to pace around the house, he followed each step. Apparently he was taking heed of Deans orders to the max, and as I started for the stairs yet again, he was right behind me.

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"Uhh-" I paused on the second step. "I'm not an angel, dude- Which means, I have to pee. Now are you going to follow me into the bathroom and watch me do my business? Or will you let me have some privacy?"

I think that actually embarrassed him, if an angel could be embarrassed, because his eyes fell from my face.

"Of course. But I will wait in the hall." He said.

Lovely, I thought. Not like that won't be awkward at all with his superman hearing. Although, actually going to the bathroom wasn't what I had in mind.

He followed me up the stairs and stood beside the door as I closed it and pushed the lock shut. The first thing I did was turn on the faucets, trying to mute out the sound coming from inside as I struggled to push the window open. Once it finally creaked open with a groan, I paused, waiting to see if Cas had noticed. He obviously didn't so I flushed the toilet to give some extra noise and started to crawl out.

It was a dangerous trip down with nothing to hold onto but a rusted rain gutter. I ended up having to fall nearly ten feet, which wasn't so bad but I did land with a hard thud. Once my feet hit the ground I took off running through the junkyard trying to make it to my car.

I knew it wouldn't be long before Cas discovered I wasn't still in the bathroom- And chances were he would be more than uber pissed once he realized how angry _Dean _would be. Yeah, I felt bad for getting him in trouble, but this was the only way to keep all of them, including Cas, safe.

I started ducking behind vehicles, jumping from one to the next trying to make it to my car, which was parked in the garage. Yeah I know, I didn't have much of a chance of escaping, seeing is that both Cas and Bobby would hear me start the engine, and Cas could just poof into it and zap me back inside. But I had to at least try. If anything I could just ditch the idea of taking a vehicle and take off on foot- At least with Cas having carved into my ribs, he wouldn't be able to locate me.

Crouched behind a partially crushed pickup, the garage was about fifty feet from me. Now came the choice of either running to it, or instead taking off and darting past the property and to the road out front. I decided that it was just too risky to take the car so I sprang to my feet and made a b-line for the adjacent property.

I had nearly made it, and I glanced over my shoulder to make sure no one was behind me, it was clear. It was somewhat gratifying and disheartening at the same time, knowing I was going to be leaving my new family behind- But it was the right thing to do. So I willed the sadness away and returned my attention back to where I was running when I slammed straight into Cas. Needless to say that it was like running into a building, and I crashed to the ground.

For a moment I could only lie there, staring up at the sky as I tried to work the air back into my lungs.

"Did you really think you could escape?" Cas asked.

Pushing myself up on my elbows, I arched a brow. "Just let me go, Cas. Think about it- If I leave, then all of you will be a hell of a lot safer."

"No. Now come back inside with me."

I stood and crossed my arms. "I'm not going back in there."

"_Yes_," He stepped closer. "You are."

"Fine, then you're going to have to drag me, but it won't matter. I'll just take off again!"

What happened next could either be considered hilarious or extremely aggravating- Depending on whos side you happened to be on. For me, it was aggravating because Cas pulled a Dean and grabbed me around the waist and started dragging me towards the house.

Trying to fight him off was impossible, his grip was like a frickin vice, so I did what everyone always said to do when someone was trying to abduct you. I went completely limp.

Didn't help. It might have had he not been an angel with unnatural strength. In fact, I think my rag-doll body actually made it more simple for him to drag me. Since that didn't work I tried kicking and squirming. Still, it didn't help much but I did seem to knock him off his balance a few times. When we reached the door he tried to shove me through but I raised both feet and braced them against the door-frame preventing him from forcing me in.

"Be reasonable!" I shrieked as he struggled with trying to pry my feet off.

"No!" He shouted, and after somehow twirling me I was over slung over his shoulder and he carried me inside.

Bobby had heard the commotion and only watched the scene with a vacant expression.

Cas carried me back into the den, and instead of throwing me on the sofa like Dean had, he sat me down gently. Afterwards he took a step back and I bit back laughter.

He looked as though he had been through a tornado, but instead it was just due to my squirming. His hair was sticking up haphazardly, his tie was completely twisted around his neck, and his shirt was partially untucked.

Just as I was thinking the incident was over he raised his hand slightly and suddenly my socks and boots vanished from my feet.

"Hey!"

"Perhaps it will be more difficult for you to run away without any shoes." He said.

"That's not fair! Where are my boots?"

"Westminster Abbey."

My face went blank. "What? Give me back my boots!"

"No."

He returned to his previous post and leaned against Bobbys roll-top desk. Bobby? He stood in the doorway with his mouth agape.

"I guess I'll get some hammer and nails." He said. "Nail the doors and windows shut."

I flopped back onto the couch and tucked my knees into my chest, probably looking like a pouting five year old while I was at it, too.

"Cas..." My eyes peered up at him. "Can you answer a question for me?"

"Possibly." He sat down beside me.

"Why is it-" I started. "That my brothers, and you, can be willing to sacrifice themselves in order to save _me_- But I can't do the same for the three of you?"

His face finally softened, and he didn't look like he wanted to tear my head off anymore.

"I have no answer to that."

"Why not? It's a simple enough question isn't it? Everyone else is ready to jump in the line of fire, but I can't do the same. Does that make sense to you?"

"It's a different situation when it concerns you."

I pulled my face from my knees. "Why is it so different? Because Dean said so?"

"No. Because _I _said so."

He was confusing me, even more than usual. It would be nice if he answered questions without making it sound like some riddle.

"You make no sense."

"I wouldn't expect you to understand."

Well that's good then, because I certainly didn't. And until someone started giving me a straight forward answer, I would continue to be left in the dark.


	15. Chapter 15

_**Little bit of a change with this chapter. There's gonna be a third person view.**_

* * *

After a few hours of sucking up, I finally managed to persuade Cas into beaming back my boots. Of course I practically had to promise in blood that I wouldn't run away again, and afterwards since I agreed to behaving, he promised to not tell Dean or Sam that I had tried to escape. But of course that didn't stop him from following me everywhere. When dinner time came around Bobby nominated me to cook us up something- But how does one make an edible meal out of beer and half empty pickle jars in the fridge?

So after searching each cabinet from top to bottom I finally found a can of chili and dumped it on the stove. It smelled like ass, and didn't taste much better. And after Bobby choked down a few bites he concluded that it wasn't worth the torture and offered to go get pizza. Of course he actually had to pry the boards he nailed up on the door loose before getting out- And afterwards ordered Cas to not take his eyes off me for a second.

Not that he had at all anyways the entire day.

I tried calling Deans phone but he wouldn't pick up- So instead I called Sam. When he picked up I sighed in relief.

"Where are you guys?" I asked.

"In Tennessee. Dean really exceeded the speed limit this time."

Obviously, seeing is that it only took around eight hours to make the trip.

"What's your plan now?"

"Uhh. We aren't sure. Since we're not one hundred percent certain where Pestilence is hiding out- It's gonna take a while to find him." I heard him grumble something. "We could really use Cas on this one."

I turned and looked at the angel who was leaning against the kitchen counter.

"I'll talk to him. Just in case, where are you exactly?"

"Just pulling into Burbank motel, right outside of Clarksville." He cleared his throat. "Listen, Lara. Dean's pissed, but..." I heard Dean cuss something in the background. "But he'll get over it. Just promise you aren't gonna take off, and everything will be good... Ok?"

Of course I didn't want to make such a promise, but considering the situation...

"Ok, I promise. I'll behave."

"Thanks. So, talk to Cas- See what he has to say and then... I guess we'll seeya soon. Bye."

He hanged up but not before I heard Dean curse a little more, then stuffed my phone in my pocket.

"They need our help." I said. "But I'm sure you already knew that."

"Where are they?" He asked.

"Just outside of Clarksville- At the Burbank motel-" I turned and went to grab my things. "I'll be ready in two seconds."

What he said next made me skid to a stop. "You're not coming."

"What? No, no no- You're not gonna ditch me on this too!"

"I'm sorry- But I am. For your own safety." He didn't give me a chance to argue before fluttering away.

"Dammit!" I shouted, kicking at a random object on the floor which was a book.

I pulled my phone back from my pocket and redialed Sams number. It rang twice before he answered.

"Yeah, Lara."

"Is Cas there?"

"Uhh, literally just appeared like two seconds ago."

"You tell that butt-hole to get his ass back here and get me! I don't appreciate being tossed aside like a random piece of garbage!"

Voices were in the background, seeing is that there wasn't shouting or cussing I knew it wasn't Dean.

"He heard you." Sam said, I could tell he was trying not to laugh. "And he said to tell you that name calling isn't nice, and that it won't motivate him to come and get you because it was a unanimous decision that you weren't going to be involved in this one."

"Unanimous?" I flopped down on the couch. "You mean to tell me that even _you _decided that I wasn't going to help?"

He sighed. "Sorry, kiddo. But yeah, I did."

"Don't pull that cutesy kiddo big brother crap on me, Sam. This is stupid. It's not a demon or a vamp, or some lame ass Rugaru, it's a horseman. You need me there to back you up."

"Maybe so, but- Dean said no. And you know how he is. Besides, I agree with him on this one. It's too dangerous." I heard Cas mutter something else in the background. "And, Cas says that you won't be able to leave the house, because he sealed the windows and doors- And if by some miracle you manage to get out... Well, let's just say your car isn't in working order."

"What? What the fuck did he do to my car?"

Sam couldn't resist chuckling. "I don't know. Just sit tight, we'll be back when we can. And remember you promised to behave yourself."

"I promise nothing!" I screamed, then hanged up on him.

Those jerks! Maybe this entire thing wouldn't have happened if I wasn't cursed with a uterus and a set of ovaries. It seemed that my being a female had its disadvantages, especially when things turned really shitty.

Of course I tried to bust the windows, but it was as though the glass had suddenly became eight inches thick. And the doors wouldn't budge an inch for me, but opened easily when Bobby returned with the pizza. But, the second he stepped inside they slammed closed on their own accord, and I couldn't open them again. After explaining the situation to Bobby naturally he agreed wholeheartedly with the extreme precautions Cas went through to ensure that I didn't run away. I literally was a prisoner this time.

* * *

"Are we sure about this?" Sam asked, examining the bowl sitting atop the motel table. "We trusted him before, and look what happened?"

"Wait a second." Dean held up his finger. "You mean, you're actually doubting contacting and using a demon? Not me?"

Sam let out a rumbled sigh. "It's just... Crowley screwed us over with the colt, what makes you think he's actually telling the truth this time?"

"There is every probability that Crowley will be leading us into an ambush." Cas was ever the optimist. "But I'm inclined to agree with Dean. We have no other way of finding Pestilence."

"Dude's outside of Cas' coverage zone." Dean went on. "So we're doing this. If it bites us in the ass..."

He didn't finish that sentence, because it was clear to all of them just how bloody and dangerous it could be. Crowley wasn't exactly the must trustworthy of confidants, and there was always an ulterior motive to his actions. He never assisted them in the past without wanting something massive in return. But, on their drive to Clarksville, both brothers were surprised and slightly unnerved to suddenly hear the gruff demons voice from the backseat of their impala. He had come bearing praise for snuffing out his son Malphas, who as he called him, was an ungrateful little piss-ant.

He had gotten a thorn in his side over something Daddy had done, and turned right to Lucifer and aligned with him. And, as repayment for Castiel smiting the bugger, he wanted to give them a hand in dealing with Pestilence. So, after spouting his usual self praising drivel, he announced that when they found a decent place to stay for the night to give him a call- And he would appear.

Which was something both Sam and Dean weren't too keen on doing, but considering they had never tangled with a horseman before, they weren't sure where to start. It wasn't as simple as searching the web for info, or dressing as a fed and interrogating so called witnesses, no- Unfortunately it now required them to try and at least trust the supposed King of Hell.

"Alright, if there's no objections?" Dean held up the lit match. "Let's call the son of a bitch."

Castiel and Sam merely nodded, and Dean dropped the match.

Not even two seconds passed before Crowley appeared.

"Hello, boys." He said, as he usually did. "That was quick of you wasn't it?"

"Let's just get started." Sam said. "Skip your usual sarcasm and worthless crap."

Crowley looked insulted. "You're never one to disappoint, Moose. Really, you hurt my feelings."

Dean snapped his fingers. "Pestilence, remember, Pestilence. Where do we find him?"

"Before I give you his location-" Crowley moved to the table where the smoking bowl sat, and leaned against it. "Aren't you one Winchester short?"

Dean and Sam exchanged troubled glances.

"What are you talking about?" Dean asked.

"I admire you're trying to hide her, I get it- I really do. The protective big brother roles and all, but it seems as though there's a rumor spreading about this little sister of yours."

"Whatever rumors you hear aren't true." Castiel quickly replied.

"Really?" His eyebrows arched. "I heard it from a very reliable source, and he would have no reason to lie to me."

"Just what rumors are they?" Deans face had darkened- He had suspected something when it came to Lara but never had any definitive proof that something was strange, other than of course, Lucifer wanting her.

"You three stooges really don't know?" Crowley smirked.

Sam and Castiel made it a point to not give each other any knowing looks. For the moment they would have to play dumb.

"Well, your loss. You know how I am- Becoming the King of Hell doesn't require making friends. So, let's talk Pestilence." He clapped his hands together. "For the record, you do know that getting with in a one hundred yard radius of him will make you grievously ill?" He looked from man to man. "No? Well, that's just a minor detail. You'll find Mr Cute and Cuddly at the Whispering Hills retirement community. I suppose he felt he would blend in with the old and quickly dying. I suppose he was right."

Dean hadn't expected him to be so honest so quickly- Normally it involved some sort of deal or hours worth of prodding to get him to talk.

"Ok, so-" Dean looked to Sam for some kind of reassurance, but his brother seemed just as perplexed. "You're just giving this info free of charge?"

"Well, normally I would demand something in return- But I figured if you can actually manage to stuff Lucifer back into his cage then I'll waver the tab. Besides, it really was an accident that the colt didn't work. Honestly, I thought it would. You can't exactly fault me for that."

No one was able to get another word in edgewise before Crowley said farewell. He wasn't planning on assisting them with killing Pestilence, he assumed that merely telling them his location would suffice.

With no plan, and no way of identifying the man, they had no idea what they should be looking for.

The drive to the retirement home was silent- No one spoke a word, even though they all thought the same thing. Chances were they wouldn't make it ten feet in the door before demons rampaged them. Either that or what Crowley said would happen- They would instantly be stricken with every sort of deadly disease known to mankind. Should that happen, Dean had given orders to Castiel to not stop no matter what and to find Pestilence and get his ring back.

Should the time come that both Sam and Dean succumbed to the illness', Cas was to resume the hunt for the rings, and make damned certain that their sister was safe. He reluctantly agreed even though he was almost certain that he could bring them back. But things had taken a drastic change as of late- So there was no telling how an angel even could withstand being in a horsemans presence.

Dean parked the impala nearly a block away just to be safe, and it was decided that he and Sam would go through the back entrance, while Castiel took the front.

Getting inside was relatively simple, after all it was a retirement home- Not a bank or jail, so it wasn't uncommon to have frequent visitors. Unfortunately not five minutes into walking the quiet halls both Sam and Dean felt their stomachs start to roll.

"Uh... I think there was something wrong with that burrito." Dean whispered.

"No, Dean." Sam braced himself against the wall. "Wishful thinking."

The nausea kept coming in waves, followed by extreme dizziness and blurred vision. It was all they could do to walk upright and search the eerily empty hallways.

"Where is everyone?" Dean asked. "This place should be crawling with demons."

"Yeah, or at least there should be a sign of..." He paused, nearly vomiting on the floor. "There's no residents here?"

"That's not a good sign."

There was a strange smell lingering in the air- It was stagnant and putrid, similar to soured milk. Not only that but the typical scent of urine hanged heavily along with it. They were after all, in a retirement home, so such a stench wasn't uncommon.

They were beginning to wonder if Crowley had lied to them. This place appeared to be completely empty- There wasn't a soul in site. Had there been, both boys were certain that at least they would have heard the wails of demons being nuked by Castiel. But there was nothing but silence, which was always a bad sign. Chances were Pestilence was well aware of their arrival, who knows- Maybe even Crowley set them up to walk straight into a trap.

That thought had crossed both brothers minds as they scaled the hallways, opening doors and taking quick peaks inside to find empty beds. Their guns were raised, while Sam kept his knife at the ready just inside his jacket.

When they reached the end of the hallway Dean was the first to collapse to his knees in a coughing fit. He tried to hide the small droplets of blood that accompanied the spasms, but Sam had already noticed. Soon after Sam as well fell to the floor, a pounding and throbbing pain was bouncing through his skull. Blood began to ooze from his ears and nose.

"We gotta get outa here, Sammy." Dean somehow managed to say.

Almost on cue Castiel appeared at the end of the hallway, noticing the state of Sam and Dean. He rushed over and quickly cured them of their ailments, but it didn't matter- Ten seconds later they were already showing signs of a different affliction.

"We have to be quick." Castiel said, helping them both to their feet. "It was a foolish idea to separate. This place is crawling with bacteria and disease."

"What was wrong with us anyways?" Already, even after being healed Dean was suffering from a different illness.

"You were in the final stages of tuberculosis, along with viral meningitis. Sam had an acute respiratory illness combined with syphilis and genital warts."

Sam stopped, standing upright- His eyes fell down towards his crotch.

"Uh, next time, Cas- Keep that bit of information to yourself." He said.

Castiel didn't understand why Sam was so offended by the remark- He was only answering honestly.

"Did you see any sign of our guy?" Dean asked, he could feel himself burning up with fever but tried to ignore it.

"No. But I believe he is located on the second floor. There are a pile of corpses stacked in the recreational area." Cas answered. "But I sensed movement on the upper levels."

"Then let's..." Sam stopped, feeling a painful and burning bladder spasm. "Dammit, let's just hurry and get this guy."

Castiel led the way, seemingly unaffected by the swirling mess of germs. Sam and Dean struggled to keep up as each were being stricken with something new and painful, not to mention disgusting.

At the top of the stairs there was nothing but gore and unidentifiable globs of... Something. It was streaked across the walls almost as if some mad man with a paintbrush had slung it there. Severed limbs and entire torsos joined the scene.

"What the hell..." Dean was just strong enough to stand and examine the mess. "What kind of sick son of a bitch is this guy?"

"This is demons work." Castiel said. "Not the work of a horseman- He specializes in diseases, not mutilation." He turned to them and after raising both hands and touching their foreheads, cured them a second time. "We should hurry."

"Ya think?" Dean readied his gun, nodding to Sam as he did the same.

Their steps were light, as they carefully maneuvered in between body parts and puddles of muck. At the end of the hallway was one door, the only door that hadn't been left open. Castiel made quick work of searching the rooms, finding nothing but more death and destruction. After giving a slight wave the boys followed, and they stopped at the closed door.

Just as Cas was reaching for the door handle Dean suddenly projectile vomited, it flew far enough that it splattered on the adjacent wall.

"Sorry." He said, wiping his mouth with the back of his sleeve. "Burrito."

Sam felt sweat caking his forehead and face, as his hands began to shake.

"Hurry, Cas." He said.

Castiel pushed the door open, and each of them was relieved to see the only clean room on the second floor.

It was squeaky clean as a matter of fact, and the beds were empty. The only person in the room was a tall thin man who stood at the picture window. His arms were behind his back, and he didn't seem to be the slightest bit alarmed at who lingered behind him.

"Sam... Dean..." He said, turning slowly. "I've been waiting. What kept you?"

Everyone eyed the man up and down, surprised that such a thin and seemingly average looking guy could actually be a horseman. But there was something about his sharp and jagged bone structure that was disturbing. Especially since his prominent brow seemed to shadow over his eyes- Which were equally disturbing in their own rights. He wore a pair of thin wire glasses, and a dark cashmere sweater- But there were traces of the unknown goo from the hallway on his pants.

"I suppose you know why we're here." Dean said, his legs had began to shake.

"You both don't look so good. Have you considered seeing a Doctor?" The man grinned. "You're suffering from a number of diseases. I'm surprised you've lasted this long, but- You do have an angel with you."

"That's right." Sam struggled to hold his gun upright. "Which means, that we're at an advantage."

"Are you?" The man twisted a gaudy ring on his index finger and suddenly Cas spurt out a mouthful of blood and fell to his knees. "His vessel is still human, and even so- I still have the ability to weaken angels on occasion. Especially ones that have rebelled and aren't as spry as they used to be."

The more he twisted the ring the more all three men began to convulse. It got to the point that Dean was certain his brain was melting inside his skull, and Sams kidneys were about to explode. Before long Sam face-planted on the floor with a puddle of blood oozing out of his mouth. Dean began to crawl as quickly as he could towards the scrawny balding freak standing at the window, Castiel, was having difficulty determining which way was up or down.

Finally after a dramatic clap of lightning Crowley suddenly appeared behind the horseman and wrapped his arms around him.

"Now, Dean!" He shouted.

Dean found the strength to leap to his feet and lunge at the man, successfully crushing his hand beneath his left elbow as he sawed his index finger off. A disgusting crunch and spray of blood ensued as his finger fell to the floor and the man disappeared.

It took a good thirty seconds after the horseman had vanished for everyone to recuperate to the point of being able to stand.

"Nice timing." Dean said, reaching down and retrieving the ring from the severed finger.

"Did you fancy my theatric entrance? Lighting and all that." Crowley sneered.

"You couldn't have come a little earlier?" Sam asked, helping Cas back to his feet.

"God, no." Crowley shrugged. "He had to be taken by surprise, didn't he?"

"We could have been killed you asshole!" Dean quickly pocketed the ring.

"But you weren't- So how about a little thanks to Crowley, eh? After all, I saved your bacon."

Castiel wiped the blood on his face all over the sleeve of his trench-coat.

"We should leave." He said. "We got what we came for."

"I'm with ya on that one." Dean said.

"Really? No thanks?" Crowley shook his head. "Fine then. Seeyou next time, boys. There are other horsemen to wrangle."

He gave a sarcastic wave before vanishing, and once he was gone Dean rubbed his head.

"That went better than expected-" He looked to Sam. "But, I'm sure you don't agree huh, Sammy? Really... Genital warts?"

"Shut up." He stomped forward and snatched the ring from Deans pocket. "One down, three to go." A smile spread from his lips and quickly faded. "But something tells me the others won't be this easy."


	16. Chapter 16

**_Introducing a new OC this chapter._**

* * *

I'm not sure when I had managed to doze off- But it was slowly approaching dawn when my eyes opened. I had passed out on Bobbys couch with my cell in hand waiting for a phone call from my boys, but hadn't heard anything since the last I had spoken to Sam. Which felt like eons ago. My stomach had been twisting into knots the entire night as I paced nervously, before long I drank too much, and eventually lied down long enough to fall into an uneasy sleep.

When my eyes scaled the darkened room and I spotted Cas standing in the shadows- This time I didn't jump from fright.

"You're back." I sat up quickly. "Are Dean and Sam..."

"They're fine." He answered.

My chest immediately untightened as I was able to breath, finally.

"How'd it go?"

"As well as could be expected."

I stood and flicked on the lamp that sat on Bobbys desk. When I turned I noticed the blood on Cas' coat sleeve.

"Wait a second..." I pointed to the splatters. "Whos blood is that?"

"Mine." He quickly pulled his arms behind his back. "I suppose I should have taken care of that before I returned."

"What happened?" Normally, if Cas was ever injured somehow and his clothing was sullied, it would be back to normal after a quick zapping. "Were they hurt?"

"There were incidents involved when dealing with the horseman, but there were no serious aftermaths. You don't need to worry."

Easy for him to say- At least he had been at their side during all of the blood-shed and not left behind to freak out.

"So you got the ring?"

"Yes."

"Where are they now? I haven't heard from them in hours."

"Shortly before I returned here they were in search of a motel. Dean said he wanted them to rest off the nights events." I could tell there was more he wanted to say, but he was hesitating. "Crowley knows about you, he knows what you are."

Instinctively my eyes fell across every inch of the house, making certain that Bobby hadn't overheard. But, thankfully he was fast asleep upstairs.

"How do you know that?"

"Because, he was with us tonight- And he assisted in bringing down Pestilence."

"What? How is that possible? Since when does Sam and Dean rely on trusting a demon?"

"It wasn't simply that they were putting their trust in him- But rather that they felt they had no other alternatives. Crowley offered to give them Pestilences location. Naturally I was skeptical but I've learned by now to never go against the Winchester brothers. They don't seem to respond positively towards an outsider giving their input."

"You're not an outsider though- You're their friend."

"_Only _their friend." He sighed. "I've made mistakes in the past- Certain choices that had severe repercussions. I believe that they hold a grudge. Yesterday afternoon after I had dragged you back inside for trying to escape- It wasn't the first incident where I was forced to subdue a Winchester. It happened with Dean as well."

I somewhat knew about that. Sam had told me a few details, but not the entire story. Basically all I knew was that something had happened which lead Dean to believe the only way out of this Lucifer crap was to say yes to Michael. Somehow, I didn't know why, but he changed his mind.

"So you dragged Dean back from saying yes to Michael?"

"To get specific I, as Dean said, kicked the crap out of him."

"So you think they hold a grudge against you for that?"

"There are other instances in the past. It was before I had rebelled."

"Why are you telling me this?"

He looked away and wouldn't meet my eyes. "Because _you're _family. And because if Crowley knows what you are, it means that it won't be long until Dean knows too- And I would prefer that he heard that information from you and not a demon. There is more of a chance of Dean forgiving you if you're honest with him."

Interesting theory, but no dice. Despite being family or not it didn't mean that Dean would just accept it. No, he would do something crazy and stupid like trying to find a way to somehow "cure" me of this ailment. Dean hated angels, he hated how Sam possessed demon blood even though it wasn't his fault. Yes he might have loved Sam, but there were times that he would blame him for something that wasn't his fault, or simply just the way he would look at him would let everyone know that he wasn't willing to forget or forgive the mistakes he made. Yes, Sam made bad choices, but he thought he was doing it for the greater good. He didn't know that by killing Lilith he was breaking the final seal- He thought he was stopping her from doing just that. If he hadn't of been manipulated by Ruby, then it never would have happened.

But, what about myself? Sam had reasons for the things he did, and despite it, Dean on most days managed to overlook it. Sure there was the times I mentioned that said he would never let Sam live it down, but...

Now I was just allowing my thoughts to ramble, in order to avoid the absolute truth that Cas spoke.

I would have to tell Dean. If he learned it from anyone else shit would hit the fan. But now was not the time. There needed to be some sort of peace before I dropped such a bomb on him. Doing it now, while there was Lucifer to contend with, getting the horsemens rings and shoving that a-hole back in his cage, the last thing Dean needed to worry about was his little sister being a mutant freak-job.

"I'll tell him, Cas." I said. "But not yet. It's too soon."

"It's your decision to make." He wasn't happy with it, clearly. "I won't mention it again."

Even if he didn't mention it again, it wouldn't matter. That would be permanently engrained into my mind until the day I died.

* * *

It had been centuries since he had touched down on earth, and even though every instinct told him it was foolish and dangerous to do it now- He didn't have a choice.

As soon as his feet hit the ground the first thing he did was take in his surroundings. The world had changed drastically since he had last visited, that last time being sometime during the dark ages. He was surprised and overwhelmed at the sheer volume of buildings, roads and vehicles.

Currently he was standing in the middle of a busy intersection, in a gaping cracked hole which was caused from his crashing. Cars honked and swerved to miss him. For a moment, he only gazed at them in confusion. He obviously faulted his ignorance to his own actions, had he not disowned heaven, earth and humanity- He wouldn't have been so befuddled. But he had, he had kept himself locked away in an area of heaven that no other celestial being would ever be able to find. It was his safety net, his own personally made prison. Needless to say that the past centuries had been lonely and dull.

"Hey, Buddy!" A man shouted from the street corner. "Have a late one last night? Or did you lose a bet?"

He hadn't even realized the attention he would gather at landing in the middle of a bustling city adorning nothing but his skin, but once he noticed a crowd of pedestrians with their eyes locked on him he arched a pale golden brow. There were a few young girls giggling and holding up some sort of device, watching his image on a small picture-like screen.

This clearly wasn't the route he should have taken. Had he known how many gawking eyes would be on him he obviously wouldn't have chosen to arrive in his physical form. So, just as the crowd was becoming particularly large he suddenly vanished, opting instead to roam about unseen.

The first thing he did was step out of the busy street and pull aside the nearest person he could find, which was a young teenage girl. Instantly he stared into her eyes and read her mind, trying to gather as much information about this era as possible.

"2013." He said, his thick English accent a vast contrast to those around him. "New York city."

He released her, and she scurried away unsure of what had just happened.

"I've touched down in the wrong location." He let out a sigh. "This does not bode well."

Next he grabbed an elderly man, preforming the same procedure as with the teenage girl.

"Vietnam veteran, that helps me none-" His striking blue-green eyes seared into the old mans gray ones.

After less than two minutes he had learned as much as possible about the last fifty years, thankfully being updated to the drastic changes and technology. The first thing he planned to do was gain possession of one of the items known as a cell phone. That, and of course, the proper clothing to blend in with society. As he passed a shop window, he noticed a mannequin fitted with a mans outfit.

"Black trousers, black overcoat, gray shirt, leather shoes. Nothing that would gain unwanted attention." He nodded in approval and with a thought, the clothing suddenly vanished from the mannequin and appeared on himself.

Fully dressed now, he allowed himself to be visible and started walking the streets until coming to a cafe, which he entered- Immediately he went to the counter, successfully pushing himself ahead of a long line.

"Pardon me." He said. "But I am in search of those called Winchester. Do you know their location?"

The young woman stared up at him with slightly widened eyes. "Excuse me?"

"The Winchesters. If I recall correctly their names are Sam and Dean. Do you know where I might find them?"

"I'm sorry, Sir. I have no idea who you're talking about." She beamed a fake smile. "Would you like to order something?"

"You cannot be serious? You mean to say that you've never heard of the brothers who are single-handedly trying to stop the apocalypse?" He stood up straight and rolled his eyes. "And no, I'm not a mad-man, but clearly you are a bumbling idiot. For your information, your lover has been having a scandalous affair with your neighbor and best friend."

He turned and stomped away from the counter, leaving the girl baffled and pale.

The longer he traveled through New York, the more he began to realize that not one single soul had ever heard of Sam or Dean Winchester. They hadn't even heard of the apocalypse, of Lucifer rising, of the angels roaming the earth. Everyone was completely ignorant to what was happening under their very noses. He finally decided to cease with questioning these fools, because no one was of any assistance.

By the time sundown had come, he entered yet another eating establishment and took a seat at an empty table. Times had certainly changed, the dark ages were bleak, quiet and humanity was far from intelligent.

"Can I help you, Sir?" A woman said, she held a small notepad in her hand.

"Please, don't address me as Sir, it makes me feel ancient. Call me Leesander." He replied. "And I don't require food or drink, but boredom has forced me to accept. Bring me whatever it is this eatery considers edible."

The woman looked about ready to cry from his cold unfeeling tone, and quickly scurried back to the kitchen.

Leesander had successfully gathered attention upon himself yet again, only this time it wasn't because he was standing stark naked in the middle of a busy street- But because the patrons were trying to understand when the last time was that they had ever seen someone so seemingly perfect and pristine. There wasn't a single flaw anywhere on his person. His skin was smooth and ageless, his hair even though a tangled mess of golden waves, somehow seemed to fall perfectly over his forehead and eyes.

The women in the eatery were starting to irk him, as they shamelessly snapped photos of him with their cell-phones. He halfway had the urge to sprout a beard to cover his face and stop their incessant staring.

Now, the only thing he needed to figure out was how in the world he was going to find the Winchesters.


	17. Chapter 17

Dean and I glared at each other from across the kitchen table, both equally content with outdoing the other as far as death-stares went. From the moment he had returned from axing Pestilence, he had done nothing but give me a hard time.

"Stop it." I said.

"Stop what?"

"Stop giving me dagger eyed stares."

He leaned closer, intensifying his expression. "I'm proving a point."

I tore my eyes from his and tapped my foot on the floor trying not to blow up at him.

"And what point is that? That you can stare at me with a face that looks like you have a pineapple up your butt?"

"No, I'm proving to you that I meant what I said. I'm not taking my eyes off you for a friggin second."

"How many times do I have to say it, Dean? I'm not going anywhere. I'm not running away, I'm not fleeing, I'm not conspiring behind your back. I' . ."

His lips were turned into a noticeable frown, the creases around his eyes seemed to deepen as he squinted his eyes at me.

"You sure about that?"

"YES! For the love of all that is good and holy I'm not going to run away!" I pushed away from the table. "It was just a thought, a backup plan to fall onto. I thought, hey- Maybe if I leave my two idiot brothers and their angel butt-buddy behind, maybe, just maybe it will save them from being stomped by Lucifer. But no, instead of thinking, yeah maybe that might be a good idea, you decide that I'm an idiot for thinking it up."

Dean sat back, his frown disappeared as he crossed his arms and pouted. "He's not my butt-buddy."

"Whatever. Now, in case you haven't noticed it's been three days since you got back from Tennessee, and in those days I haven't tried to escape. So maybe it will sink into your pea sized brain that I'm not planning on running away!"

"Dean..." Sam entered the kitchen with an open book in hand. "Just listen to her already. You're gonna have to trust her when she says she's not going anywhere."

"Funny, you say that-" Dean stood. "But I just can't believe it. Because, unfortunately, she's too damned much like us. Which means, that she would be willing to sacrifice herself. She's a Winchester through and through." He returned his eyes to mine. "So get used to it, baby- Because I'm on you like white on rice."

I huffed out half a laugh, and half a cry. If he wasn't my brother I would punch him in the throat.

"Fine. Follow me everywhere I go, sick your boyfriend on me, glare at me with that stupid fat face of yours all you want to. You're going to be extremely disappointed when you realize that you're wasting your time!"

I stomped into Bobbys den and Dean followed after me. I sat on the couch and he sat next to me, continuing to keep his eyes locked on mine. The more I tried to ignore him, the closer he would inch himself until he was practically sitting on my lap and his face was literally a half an inch from my own.

"I'm going to kill you." I said.

"This is your punishment. You have to put up with my crap until I say otherwise."

"Sorry, Lara." Sam said with a snicker. "Dean is like dog-shit on your shoe. You're never gonna get rid of him."

I crossed my legs and shifted, turning my face away from his- He responded to that by leaning over me and yet again sticking his face in mine. After five minutes I jumped back to my feet and he followed.

"Stop it!" I shrieked.

"On one condition." He said practically smashing me against the wall. "Say you're sorry, that it was a mistake, and that I am your god."

"Fuck off, I'm not apologizing for shit. Like I said, it was only a thought."

Sam groaned and rubbed his face with his hands. "Oh my god, I'm going to kill both of you. Lara, just say it so he'll back off and this can be over."

I looked up at Dean, he widened his eyes and smirked at me.

"Fine! I'm sorry, it was a mistake. I was a foolish foolish woman. You're all knowing and magnificent and I tremble in your presence."

"God..." He smiled. "I am your _god_."

I gritted my teeth and nodded. "Alright fine. You're god... Happy now?"

He immediately stepped away and flopped back on the couch. "It'll do... For now."

"You're lucky I don't kill you in your sleep."

He only laughed that sarcastic laugh of his and made himself comfortable.

"So, Sammy- Any signs of the remaining horsemen?" He asked.

Sam shrugged and thumped his book closed. "Well, seeing is that there's no catastrophic biblical signs anywhere, I would say no."

"Would we even know what we're looking for?" I asked. "It's not as though the horsemen have showed themselves in the last few thousand years."

"Yeah, I know." Sam sighed. "But, I would say that if anything really big suddenly goes down- They would be the first culprits at the top of the list."

"So Pestilence had, of course, made everyone disgustingly sick." I paused. "Ahem, genital warts." Sam quickly glared at Dean. "So, what would the rest of them do?"

Dean grinned widely at how Sam was now giving him death stares.

"Well, war. I would assume would cause... War." Sam stated the obvious. "So, if there's a town or city that suddenly starts killing each other..."

"Death, people start dropping like flies." Dean went on. "Famine, what... People starve to death?"

"That sounds too simple." Sam shook his head. "People are starving to death everyday. No, it would have to be something more complicated."

"In the mean time." I sat down and propped my feet up. "What are we gonna do? I don't know about the two of you, but- I could really use a break from all this crap."

Dean and Sam looked at me like I'd lost my mind.

"A break?" Dean huffed. "You think that we can just say to hell with all of this and take a vacation? Ok, sis- Where do you wanna go? Hollywood? Florida? Mount friggin Everest?"

"You don't have to get snippy, Dean." I kicked him slightly. "But think about it. We're constantly on the go, blasting through monsters left and right. Whether you want to admit it or not, you're tired, Sam is tired. I'M tired, it could do us good to just take a week off, relax and have some fun."

Sam snickered. "Uh, Lara. I don't think Dean knows what _fun _is."

"Fun isn't in our job descriptions." Dean retorted with a scowl. "People like us don't get to have fun."

"That's the exhaustion talking."

"Ya know... We don't have any cases lined up. Things are actually pretty quiet right now." Sam shrugged. "Even if it's just a couple hours to maybe catch a movie, or just sit here and watch tv- It's better than nothing."

I jumped up and grabbed the newspaper from the kitchen table, jogging back in and holding it up revealing an enormous announcement.

"What about this?" I said.

Dean cocked his head to the side and gave half a smile.

"State fair. Starts today." He said. "God I can't even remember when the last time was I've ever been to one of those."

"That's your idea of a relaxing break?" Sam rolled his eyes. "Screaming kids, greasy food and rusted out carnival rides?"

"Oh comon now, Sammy. Don't be afraid. I'm sure there won't be _too _many clowns there." Dean winked.

Sams eyes widened and his face went blank.

Judging by his expression I knew I would have to get the story about that later on. Apparently, big brother Sam was afraid of clowns.

* * *

The fairgrounds were packed and stuffed to the brim. Every ride had at line at least a mile long, along with every food or game stand. Dean didn't seem to care, it was the first time since I met him that I had ever seen him actually halfway... Happy. Sam, however, wasn't sharing the same emotions. He had been petrified of every clown toy, statue, or an actual living clown we came across. And Dean didn't hesitate to poke fun of him nearly every second.

Honestly this state fair thing wasn't exactly my cup of tea- I mean, sure. If you discount the million screaming children and crowded atmosphere it was an ok time. But really, I only suggested it for Sam and Dean. They were run ragged and both could use a little time off. This whole Lucifer and apocalypse crap was slowly enveloping all of us. And for once I wanted a day, just one day, where the words Lucifer, vessel or demon didn't pop up in conversation. And thankfully for the last two hours neither of them had mentioned it. For the moment they were actually letting their guards down and just enjoying themselves.

"What next?" Dean said, after snarfing down half a hot-dog. "We've been on every ride except the spinning teacups and carousel. Oh, and the haunted house."

"Those haunted houses are lame." Sam protested. "It's a waste of time."

"You're such a buzz kill, little brother. You should actually give em a chance- After all, how many chances will we have to go into a haunted house that won't try to kill us?"

"Dean-" Sam stuffed his hands in his pockets. "When you were fourteen and you talked me into walking through one of those, you pulled a gun on a dude dressed as a vampire and tried to blow his head off."

Dean nodded. "Yeah well, that dick jumped out at me. You don't do that to a kid."

We started walking again, until stopping at another food stand. Dean ordered a side of onion rings and a funnel cake, and we sat down at the only empty picnic table left.

"Lara for once, I gotta say. You actually had a good idea." Dean said, pushing his basket of onion rings towards me.

I snatched one up and crunched into it. "Guess I'm not that big of an idiot, hm?"

Sam actually took an onion ring too, which was surprising. Very rarely did I see him eating anything other than a salad.

"So we've been here all day." Dean said. "We've had our fun but I think we need to talk about what we're gonna do next."

Sighing, I rested my head in my hands and rolled my eyes. Well, it lasted a few hours at least.

"There's nothing to do until something turns up." Sam pulled his phone from his jacket. "No messages, no missed calls- Nada. Things are still quiet."

"Which is strange all in itself." I said. "Let's be honest, there aren't many instances where absolutely no one has been maimed or killed in a suspicious way."

Dean suddenly groaned and held his stomach. "Ah, man. I'm getting crampy."

"Gee I wonder why." Sam snorted. "Maybe it's cause you've eaten five chili dogs, a taco and half a funnel cake."

He pushed himself away from the picnic table. "Where's the porta-crappers? I'm gonna be sick."

He rushed through the crowd while Sam and I chased after him. We just saw him dart into an empty porta-potty and slam the door. The sounds afterwards were not at all pleasant.

Sam cringed and tried to void out the gagging and groans by turning to me.

"Uhh... Yeah, I'm gonna go get a coke."

I watched him walk away quickly. "Wimp!" I shouted.

Dean continued gagging and moaning in misery, so I knocked on the door.

"You ok in there big guy?"

"Uhhh." He groaned. "Carnival food is evil."

"Do you need anything?"

"I just wanna lay down and go to sleep."

"Well you can't do it in there- Come on, let's head back to Bobbys."

* * *

After a few more puking sessions Dean was finally feeling better- At least enough to lug himself off of the sofa and grab a beer from the kitchen. Bobby was off on some job, one that he wouldn't talk to us about- Apparently he wanted to go solo on this one, which was something he did quite often.

By the end of the day Sam had resorted to reading the local paper for practically every frickin town just to find some kind of a job, and after an hour Cas finally returned from... Wherever the hell he ran off to every other day.

It was just approaching midnight when Sam suddenly sat up straight at his laptop.

"Guys, check this out." He said.

Everyone immediately piled into the kitchen, because let's be honest- We were bored out of our minds now with nothing to do. As soon as we encircled him he started to read.

"A strange event in New York City. Witnesses claim a nude male fell from the sky landing directly in the center of Manhattan. According to witness testimony he fell with such a speed and force it left a nearly two feet deep crater in the street."

"_Ook_." Dean said, skeptical. "And this dude survived the fall? Did he jump off a skyscraper or something?"

"No. It says here that there was a streak of white light, followed by an enormous impact. Afterwards he stood in the middle of the street for several minutes, then suddenly vanished." He clicked around. "Apparently someone got a video of him for approximately ten seconds, which shows him vanishing."

He brought up the video and turned the laptop so we could see. Cas as well leaned over to catch a glimpse.

The video was, as Sam said, only ten seconds long. But from what I could see it was indeed a naked man. His back was facing whomever made the video with their cell, so the only thing I could see was wavy dark blonde hair, and of course his naked ass. Then, poof, suddenly he just disappeared.

"Well that's interesting." Deans brows were arched. "Cas, any theories on that one?"

"It is indeed interesting. Considering there was a streak of white light seen, and the man had the capability of vanishing, I would say he was an angel. But, I'm uncertain as to why the man would be nude." He looked to each of us and shrugged. "When we possess our vessels, generally we tend to choose one that is fully clothed."

"So if it's an angel-" Dean began to pace. "Chances are good that it's another one up Zachariah and Raphaels ass. Any strange killings or massive explosions after this guy touched down?"

"No-" Sam shook his head. "Nothing other than the falling naked man. But-" He opened up another page. "Several people claimed after he vanished that they had a very overwhelming sensation of... Well, being violated."

"I'm assuming not in the good way." Dean snickered.

"No-" Sam rolled his eyes. "They said it felt like a cloud or fog had, in their own words, entered their mind and read their thoughts."

Everyone looked to Cas again, and just as always his eyes were shifting back and forth.

"An angel does have the capability of reading ones thoughts." He said.

"Seriously?" Dean took a step back. "You mean, you can just... Hop on in our heads any old time you want to?"

"Theoretically speaking, yes. But, it doesn't mean that I do it. It's a complete violation of privacy."

"That's a relief." I sighed. "I don't exactly want my deepest and darkest secrets being read. Cause, yeah... Well, I got some doozies."

Now everyone stared at me, Sam made a silent O with his lips, Dean snickered maniacally and Cas scrunched his brows with a tilted head. Sometimes I really needed to monitor my words more closely.

"Anyways-" Dean turned back towards the laptop. "If this dude hasn't nuked anyone yet, and there really is no way of finding him- I guess we'll throw it on the back burner for now."

"Perhaps not." Cas said. "I find it strange that an angel would return to earth and immediately begin reading peoples thoughts. He shouldn't have to- All celestial beings have direct communication with each other..."

"Angel radio." Dean interrupted.

"Correct. Which makes me speculate that possibly this man has either been cut off from that communication, or simply that he hasn't been listening. It would make him out of touch with humanity and their growth. Which then of course would warrant his reasonings for reading thoughts."

"What's the point of that though? Couldn't he just flip back on his angel radio?" I asked.

"That would be the normal routine. Unless he was considered rebellious and didn't want to be noticed by our superiors."

"Kind of failed on that one- What with landing naked in the middle of Manhattan." Dean shook his head. "So, you saying you wanna search for this guy? What if he's dangerous?"

"I could search and not get too close. Just in case. But I have to admit I am strangely curious."

The three of us shared glanced before Dean shrugged. "Your call, dude. Just don't get your ass killed."


	18. Chapter 18

The one thing that he could admit to missing about earth was the beautiful sunrises. Yes heaven was definitely beautiful in its own way- But there was nothing like being able to sit on a hillside and watch the sun rise. There was a certain peacefulness, a serenity that you just couldn't find in heaven. There was always some sort of uproar happening there, angels fighting, archangels shouting out orders creating complete anarchy. He was more than ashamed to call them his brethren.

Leesander popped up the collar to his jacket to avoid the chill to the air- His eyes had been transfixed on the sky ever since dawn, and sadly now he had to depart.

A week had passed since he landed back on earth, and in that week he had left New York and was now standing in in the middle of a field in the state called Ohio. He had decided against questioning anyone for the mean time- Since anyone he spoke to had no idea who the Winchesters were- Which of course, baffled him. How was it possible that the entire of humanity was utterly clueless to the fact that Lucifer was free from his cage, and that the apocalypse was sure to come? Either he was mistaken and humanity hadn't advanced much as far as intelligence goes, or they were simply left in the dark. Perhaps it was angels work- That they had kept this entire ordeal a secret?

He turned to leave the hillside, making it halfway through the field when he was suddenly surrounded by a group of twenty figures. One man stood out amongst the rest as he stepped forward and eyed him up and down.

"Just which one of those little cloud hopping pansies are you?" He asked. "We heard another one touched down."

Leesander let out an annoyed sigh. "I'm certain you wouldn't have heard of me."

"Really? Now I don't know about that. We seem to keep pretty good track of you pieces of filth."

Leesander took a moment to eye each figure surrounding him. He could see their actual faces behind the human skin they wore. Demons, the whole lot of them.

"I really haven't the time to deal with your nonsense right now. I suggest you flee now while you still have the chance." He said.

"Flee? In case you haven't noticed, buddy- There are twenty of us and only one of you. Now, answer my questions and maybe we'll make your death quick." He allowed an angel blade to slide out of his coat sleeve. Leesander arched a brow once he saw it. "Yeah, we all carry them. You'd be surprised what you can find just lying around. Now, first question. What's your name?"

He sighed. "Leesander." When he noticed their vacant expressions he smirked. "I told you you wouldn't have heard of me."

"Well that doesn't matter. Now tell me whos side your on. Lucifers, or your angel pals?"

"Lucifer? You mean to tell me that there are actually angels that are siding with that pouting child? But in answer to your question I'm on neither side. I'm here for my own wants." He took a step forward but the demons encircled him tighter. "If you will excuse me gentlemen, I would like to be on my way."

Yet again they moved closer.

"Final warning." Leesander brought his hands from his jacket pockets.

They only sneered and after yet another annoyed sigh Leesander raised his left hand slightly and instantly every single demon spontaneously combusted into a pillar of flames. They hadn't even the chance to wail or scream before their bodies were reduced to nothing but smoldering ashes. He stared at each pile for a moment before adjusting his jacket, and carefully stepping over them as to not sully his shoes.

He kept walking until sunset, and then sunrise the next day. In fact he didn't stop for even a second and before long the state of Ohio, Indiana, Illinois and Missouri was long in the distance. He knew he could gain more distance by using his wings, but it was too risky. Doing so left behind what could be considered an energy trail that any angel in creation would be able to spot and follow. He had actually considered stealing a vehicle, but with absolutely no knowledge on how to drive one, chances were he could careen off of a bridge.

As morning of the second week on earth approached he found himself standing on the outskirts of Sioux Falls South Dakota.

"If I recall correctly..." He muttered to himself. "This is the place."

The streets were depressingly quiet with it being so early- But luckily there was a diner that was open at such an hour. He stepped inside and immediately found a booth.

It amazed him slightly that he had acquired a taste for greasy food, but he found that it helped to take his mind off the boredom. When a waitress approached he already knew what he wanted.

"What'll it be, Hun." She asked.

"Hash-browns, a side of bacon and french toast. Coffee, black."

Much like most did when they heard him speak, she arched her brows. It wasn't every day that an English man visited Sioux Falls.

"Be right up." She smiled.

"Do you think you could give me some information please?" He asked and the waitress immediately stopped. "I'm looking for a very old and dear friend of mine. His name is Bobby Singer."

Just as the waitress was going to respond a woman dressed in law enforcement garbs stepped up.

"I'll take this, Betty." She said, then sat down across from him. "You're looking for Bobby Singer?"

"That's correct. I haven't spoken to the fellow in probably a decade. Do you know where I might find him, Miss?"

"That's Sheriff Mills, Sir." Her dark eyes looked skeptical, and Leesander could already see why. This woman was well aware of the supernatural riff-raff this Bobby Singer had based his life on killing. "I've known Bobby for several years- How did you meet him?"

"Oh, it was so long ago." He smiled. "I'll just say that he helped exterminate some pests in my childhood home."

Finally her eyes seemed to soften some. "I see. Well, Bobby has been out of town for the last couple weeks. We aren't sure when he'll be back."

"Ah. I understand. Can you tell me his place of residence so that I might drop him a letter?"

She leaned forward. "Look. I know everyone in my town and I don't remember ever seeing you before. Whether you're a friend of Bobbys or not, I don't know. But I'm not about to point out where he lives just in case. You understand, right?"

He glared into her eyes as a smirk crept across his perfectly sculpted lips.

"Oh, I understand perfectly."

"Are we going to have a problem here?"

"Certainly not. You'll receive no issues from me, Sheriff Mills."

She nodded, then stood. "Good. Enjoy your stay in Sioux Falls."

He watched her leave the diner with a noticeable frown.

"Some humans... Terribly rude." He murmured just barely avoiding being heard by the waitress who brought his meal.

After inhaling every bite, he paid the tab and left the diner, beginning with preforming his own special interrogation- Which was reading this towns citizens minds. It didn't take long at learning Bobby singers location- Honestly he could have simply invaded the Sheriffs thoughts, but didn't want to take the risk of alarming her more than she already was. But once he finally learned that Bobbys home was just outside of town, he found himself standing on the street staring at his property within a matter of minutes.

"This, is where you spend your free time?" He said, glaring at the abundant supply of wrecked vehicles. "Not exactly a fitting residence for someone of your stature."

For three days he stood in the exact same spot, waiting. Until finally a black impala with a loud rumbling engine pulled into the drive. As he watched two males and a female climb out and enter the house, he smirked.

"Found you."

* * *

"I'm starving to death." Dean whined. "Lara, go into town and fetch me some pie."

I stopped with lugging in our things, dropping them just beside the door.

"Go get your own damned pie, I'm not your servant."

He tried giving me the same puppy dog eyes that Sam always did, which might have worked if it wasn't apparent the emotion was completely fake. Besides... It just didn't work with him. There was something about Sam, and the way he could contort his face to the point your heart broke, which in turn would make you want to do anything for him. Dean? He usually just ended up pissing me off.

"Please?" He smiled. "I've been driving for ten hours straight."

"You mean- You're actually going to let me go into town alone?" I smirked at him.

"Nope. Cas is gonna go with you. Aren't ya, Cas?"

Now I scowled while Cas' attention was taken off of our crap lying beside the door. "Oh... Yes of course."

"For the millionth time I'll say that I don't need a babysitter, Dean. I promised you I wasn't going to take off- When are you gonna let this go?"

"Never."

"Whatever. Are you actually gonna let me drive your car to fetch your precious pie, or do I have to walk?"

Sam had already half way passed out on the sofa. "What about your car, kiddo?"

"Oh _my _car. You mean the one that Cas completely destroyed by yanking the tires off and poofing the engine into the cosmos? Yeah, I'll get right on that."

"I've apologized for that numerous times." Cas frowned. "And I swore that once Dean allowed it, I would put it back together again."

It was hard to stay mad at Cas with that clueless baby faced expression. But really, you don't fuck with a girls ride, doesn't everyone know that?

"Ok, Cas. Let's go. I guess you get to ride shot-gun for once." I said, waving for him to follow.

He actually seemed eager at that, and after Dean tossed me his keys and pretty much threatened to behead me if I put a microscopic scratch on his baby- We took off.

So, the last couple of weeks had actually been really quiet. Sure, there were a couple of jobs here and there but nothing that was too extreme. But, unfortunately there hadn't been a sign of the horsemen since Pestilence. Chances were they heard what happened to their buddy and were lying low to avoid having their fingers hacked off. Dean and Sam both were more than pissed- Now that we had an actual way of stuffing Lucifer back inside his cage, it was taking what felt like an eternity to get it done. Although, really- It wasn't that long. Two weeks isn't so bad, but- When you're in a hurry to, oh ya know, end the apocalypse and save millions of lives, weeks felt like years.

As far as the mysterious naked angel? Nope, Cas hadn't found him. Not that I was surprised at all, because those little buggers had a way of keeping themselves out of the line of site. But as long as he wasn't going on any killing sprees or annoying the piss out of us, then I didn't really care. We had other things to worry about, such as getting the horsemens rings.

Bobby finally let us in on his mission, which had kept him out of town for the last two weeks. It had something to do with a nest of vampires, and he was teamed up with a buddy called Rufus. He denied assistance when we offered it, and Dean had said to just leave it alone and let the old man handle it. Naturally I was reluctant to do so seeing is that Bobby was the closest thing I had to an actual Dad- I didn't want him getting himself eaten. But yes, I was slowly beginning to learn by now to not question Dean, although that of course didn't stop me from back sassing him at every turn. That was the nature of our relationship was name calling and driving each other up the wall.

"You're awfully quiet." I said, peering over at Cas in the passenger seat. "Something on your mind?"

"There are always _things _on my mind."

"Alrighty then. Anything you want to talk about?"

He glanced at me for a moment. "I promised that I wouldn't bring the subject up again."

"Ah-" Already I knew what he meant. "Well if there's something really bothering you, babe- Then just spit it out."

He sighed. "What I haven't been telling you as that Dean has been questioning me. Nearly every time we're alone. He knows there's something you're not telling him. And naturally he suspects that I know what that something is."

I chewed my bottom lip. "I see, and... You're starting to feel guilty for keeping it secret for me?"

"No. Because there is a part of me that believes keeping your true identity a secret is wise. But, then there is another part of me that knows allowing Dean to hear it would be beneficial."

"I hardly see that as being possible." I turned the car into the parking lot outside the diner. "Because, once he finds this out he'll either 1. Never look at me in the same way again, or 2 refuse to let me out of his site even more than he already is."

After turning off the engine we both hesitated getting out.

"I just don't think you have much time left." He said. "With Lucifer, Zachariah and Raphael, and now finally Crowley somehow learning of it..." He cut his sentence short.

"Are you really that worried about it?"

He shifted slightly until he was facing me. "Aren't you?"

"Honestly I try not to think about it. I don't feel like anything other than what I've always been- And had you not read that damned journal I would still feel this way." Now I faced him. "Ok, think about it this way. What if someone suddenly told you that you couldn't be an angel anymore, that you had be human. Wouldn't that scare the crap out of you?"

His face remained blank as his eyes fell from mine. "Of course."

"Because it's all you've ever known? Because you wouldn't know the first thing about being human?"

"Correct."

"Well, that's how I feel about this. Yeah maybe it's stupid and dangerous hiding it- But the longer I can actually do that, the longer I can still feel like just plain old Lara Winchester. Nothing else, just Sam and Deans stupid little sister. I gotta hold onto that for as long as I can."

He nodded, finally seeming to understand how I felt. "I suppose I would do the same if I were cursed with your unfortunate situation."

I rolled my eyes and pushed the door open. Cas always had a way of saying things, without intending to come off as cold, but it would always make you roll your eyes at him. But, he was an angel, and obviously his social skills weren't exactly top notch.

The diner was just starting to fill with the breakfast crowd and I quickly flew to the last two empty bar stools. Cas and I sat and we waited for nearly fifteen minutes before a waitress approached.

"What'll it be?"

"To go orders." I had this memorized with how many times I watched Sam and Dean order their food. "First of all, a slice of the best pie you have, pancakes and a side of bacon. And..." Dammit, I swear to god I hated ordering Sams food. "Actually just make that three of the same."

Sam wasn't getting his girly food this morning, he was just going to have to deal with eating something unhealthy like the rest of us.

"That should be around twenty minutes." The waitress tucked her pencil behind her ear and returned to the kitchen.

"Excuse me? You're Castiel aren't you?" A woman said from behind us. We both turned to see a police officer. "We met once before, I'm Sheriff Mills."

Cas passed me a quick glance. "Of course. Sheriff Mills."

"I'm sorry to disturb you but, could I speak to you for a moment?" She smiled, passing me a weary glance. "It's about Bobby."

Yet again Cas glanced at me.

"I'll just wait here." I said, giving a fake smile.

I watched him follow the Sheriff to the other side of the diner, wondering what in the world she would want to talk to Cas about. I knew she wasn't the enemy, Sam and Dean had told me stories of how she helped with some kind of zombie issue before I came along- And ever since then had been extremely helpful when it concerned Bobby and dead bodies turning up. But, since she didn't know who I was, naturally she wasn't comfortable talking to Cas in my presence. Of course I didn't like that.

In the mean time I pulled out my phone and started searching the web for any recent news articles that might have been up our alley. Since I was preoccupied I didn't pay much attention to a man who sat beside me, until he turned to me and said.

"Pardon me, I wouldn't want to be a bother, but do you think it possible that I borrow your cell phone. I seemed to have lost mine and I have an important call to make?"

I tore my eyes off my phone, wondering if he had been talking to me. You see, generally people tend to avoid me like the plague- I wasn't exactly approachable. There was something about my facial expressions that scared people away, so of course I was surprised when I realized that this man, with a thick English accent and golden brown hair, was indeed talking to me.

"Uh." I said, unsure of what to make of him. "Sure, go ahead."

He smiled and instantly I couldn't help but stare dumbly at it. Yeah, I'll say it... He was good looking.

I handed him my phone and watched as he punched in a random number. I could hear it ring a good six times before he let out a sigh and hanged up.

"Bollocks. No answer." He then handed it back to me. "Well, thank you anyhow, Miss?"

I blinked a few times over. Of course I was suspicious. I didn't know this dude, he could have been frickin anyone. From a demon, to another dick angel, or some other sort of monster. I quickly passed a glance to Cas who was still conversing with the Sheriff- He seemed to have noticed this stranger talking to me and his face wasn't that of happiness, especially when the Sheriff as well turned and even over the crowd I could hear her say.

"That's him. That's the guy."

Oh great. What now? So was it indeed another demon or dick angel? Or was I dealing with something else potentially dangerous?

"No offense." I said. "But I don't usually give my name out to people I don't know."

He gave a crooked smile. "No offense taken. Perhaps it would help if I gave my own? I'm Lee."

"Yeah, um... _Lee_, look, man- I don't want to be rude, but I have an overly protective pit-bull standing over there and I don't think he would like it very much if we got too chummy."

His blue-green eyes shifted to Cas and he nodded. "Oh, Castiel? Of course I understand. Angels do have a tendency to preform their duties most thoroughly. I would expect nothing less."

My hand inched to my pistol hidden in my jacket. "Who the hell are you?"

"I just told you. My name is Lee- Well, Leesander if you want to get specific, although I think Lee seems to fit in more with the times here."

"I don't give a crap about your name. _What _are you?"

He continued to smile, and normally by this time I would be starting to freak out by such a show of emotion- But, it didn't seem to be a maniacal "I'm going to eat your face" smile- Instead, it was calm and almost said "I understand completely".

"Listen. I understand that you're confused, Lara. Under the circumstances I believe I would be as well... Actually-" He paused and let out a quiet and rather pleasant laugh. "I _am _rather confused. So, let me just say that you needn't worry- I'm not here to harm you, in fact- I'm here to help you. Now, as I can clearly see from my peripheral vision that Castiel is making a quick trip in this direction, it seems as though you've already made your first choice. So, you're in good hands. I'll take my leave for now. But, should you ever require my assistance. Just say my name and I will appear."

He stood and adjusted his black overcoat, turning up his collar- And he didn't seem to be in any hurry to escape Cas' wrath.

When Cas returned to the bar where I sat, he eyed Lee up and down.

"Who are you?" He asked.

"No one you would have heard of before, brother." He nodded slightly. "Take care."

With that he strode confidently out the diner doors and disappeared onto the street. Of course Cas looked at me for some kind of explanation.

"I have no idea what just happened." I said, in my own defense.

"What did he say to you?"

"Uhh, nothing that made a whole heck of a lot of sense. Just rambling about how he wasn't here to hurt me and that he wanted to help. Said his name was Lee, or Leesander."

Cas scrunched his brows. "That name does send a slight twinge of familiarity, but I'm not certain how."

"He called you brother... Was he an angel?"

"No. Had he been I would have seen his true face through his vessel."

Ok, so we were dealing with some crazy human then? Because if he was a demon Cas still would have been able to see his real face.

"Order up." The waitress said, sliding our to-go boxes on the counter.

I grabbed the bags, paid the bill and quickly left the diner with Cas in toe. Yeah, Sam and Dean weren't going to be thrilled with this one.


	19. Chapter 19

After Cas had explained the mysterious encounter, Dean was furious- Sam, he didn't look much happier. Especially since this man, Lee, had already been questioned by Sheriff Mills.

"So, what did this dude look like?" Dean asked.

"I don't know-" I groaned. "He was a guy, probably around six feet, wavy blonde hair, average build."

Sam sat up straight, then flipped his laptop open, after finding what he was looking for he swung it around.

"Sort of like our mysterious naked angel?" He asked.

I leaned over and looked at the video clip again. "It's hard to say- He wasn't naked this time, maybe if I see him again I'll ask him to drop his pants."

All three men scowled at my sarcasm.

"This isn't a joking matter, Lara." Dean used my name... He only used my name when he was uber pissed.

"Well I'm sorry, it's not like I can identify him just by looking at the back of his head." I examined the video more closely. "Yeah, ok. He has the same hair and same build. But, I can't see his face so it's not definite."

"But Cas said this dude wasn't an angel?" Sam added. "Which means, it can't be this guy."

"Alright then." Dean shrugged. "You said all you had to do was call him and he'd come on over, right?" I nodded. "So, call him. Get his ass over here so we can find out once and for all who or _what _the fuck he is."

"I'm not certain that's a wise procedure." Cas intervened. "No, he wasn't an angel or a demon- But there is no way of knowing what he might be."

"Great, so an unidentified monster. Just what we need right now." Dean shook his head. "Why are things just getting freakier and freakier?"

"Because our lives suck." I answered. "We can never catch a break. It's always one disaster to the next and it'll be that way until we all drop dead."

"Gee, Lara. Tell us how you really feel." Sam snickered.

I shrugged. "Just being honest."

"Alright, so, enough of that-" Dean said. "How about we call this guy, but first- We'll get Bobbys garage fixed up to trap every evil son of a bitch we've heard of. Something's gotta work."

"Risky." Sam sighed. "But, this guy's here now and we can't really do anything about it. At least not until we figure out a way to kill him."

"If he's even dangerous." Cas intervened.

"What? You think he might not be?" Dean looked skeptical.

"While I couldn't identify him as anything other than human, there was still an aura about him that didn't give off deceit or danger. I would like to think I'm somewhat skilled at reading people..." When everyone went silent and gaped at him he nervously added. "Sometimes."

"Well, we got shotguns filled with salt rounds, the demon slaying knife, silver, iron, lambs blood..."

"Yeah, Dean. We get it." Sam stood. "But, what if none of those things work on this guy? We'd have called him here and then have absolutely no way of taking him down."

"We got Cas?" Dean defended. "I mean, little nerdy dude can smite anyone."

I put my head in my hands. "Why does this always end up with us calling the enemy right to us? How many times has that fucked up on us now? Twice? First Malphas, then Gabriel... Now our new mystery monster."

"Threes a charm." Dean grinned.

* * *

Let me state that I, with _extreme _reluctance, followed my two idiot brothers to Bobbys garage to assist in monster proofing it. Which, might I add- Took forever. After nearly three hours of spray painting every monster, demon or angel trap known to man on the floor and walls, everyone readied their weapons.

In my hands I had the shotgun, in my pants I had my pistol, strapped to my belt I had a silver knife. Dean and Sam had the same, except they had our homemade holy oil molotovs on hand- Just in case. Basically, we were ready to trap and kill anything that walked inside. All this trouble for a guy who very well could have been human and would die with a simple bullet.

No way did I want to do this, not after the last two times that completely fucked up.

"I think we're ready." Sam announced, admiring all of the symbols he'd painted.

"Same here." Dean added. "So, call him up, Lara. Get this asshole here."

"Uh, are we sure we want to do this?"

"It'll be fine... Remember... Cas?" Dean looked to Castiel who stood off to the side. "Pick up your phone and start dialing."

"That might be easy if I had his number... He just said all I had to do was call his name and he would come."

Dean pursed his lips. "Ok, so that means we aren't dealing with a normal human." He raised his gun. "Go ahead. Do it... Call him."

"Before you do." Cas stepped forward. "There was something I neglected to tell you beforehand. This man, when I looked at him in the diner- He seemed to be human, but- He was lacking something very important." Everyone waited for him to go on as his eyes shifted to each of us. "His soul."

"No soul? So, this dude didn't have a soul? What the hell does that mean, even monsters have souls." I said.

"I... I really have no explanation, this is the first I've ever encountered a being like him."

"Awesome." Dean cocked his shot-gun. "Well, no turning back now. Let's do this."

Everyone watched me and I awkwardly stared around the room. "Uhh, what do I say?"

"Just call his name, tell him to get his ass here so we can talk." Dean answered.

"Yeah, like asking in a threatening tone will motivate him, ugh... Fine... Ok, yeah I feel incredibly stupid for doing this but Leesander if you can hear me can you maybe stop by for a minute. We need to have a little talk."

Everyone went silent as they readied their weapons, but all was quiet. There were no gusts of wind, no claps of thunder or rivers of blood. Everything was perfectly calm.

"Maybe he didn't hear you?" Sam said.

"Or, maybe he was just this lunatic guy that was full of shit and fucking with my head." I retorted.

Dean waved his gun. "Call him again."

"Fucking shit... Leesander-" I said again. "Dude I don't know what you want me to say, this isn't an emergency, I don't need help, but yeah we've got a shit ton of questions and only you can answer them. So... Will you come?"

When we heard footsteps crunching across the driveway gravel Sam was the first to sneak over and peak out a crack in the door.

"Someone's coming." He said.

"Duh, do ya think so?" I replied sarcastically. "Who is it?"

"Don't know. He's dressed in a black overcoat from the looks of it."

"That's him!" I practically shrieked.

Everyone moved into position and aimed their guns at the door. Cas moved ahead to stand in front of us, because let's face facts, he was way more potent then salt rounds.

As the doors to the garage creaked open, my finger was slowly starting to squeeze the trigger, even though everything inside me said that shooting him not only would do no good, but it wasn't necessary.

Once the sunlight illuminated the area and he appeared almost like a terrifying apparition- Everyone held their fire. He stepped inside examining every trap painted around him, then kept walking over each and every one.

"Well that's not good." Dean said. "Hey that's far enough hot shot!"

Lee immediately stopped and eyed Dean up and down.

"You must be the eldest brother." He said. "Funny, I pictured you taller." His eyes then went to Sam. "You, however. Are _too_ tall."

"Who the hell are you?" Sam asked. "How do you know our sister?"

"I don't know your sister, you're mistaken. We've only just met this morning."

"Don't get smart." I said. "You somehow knew Cas' name, and my name. You knew Cas was an angel, so start explaining yourself."

He pointed to each of us. "Are all humans as suspicious as the lot of you?"

"When some mook shows up by falling naked out of the sky and vanishing into thin air us humans tend to get suspicious." Dean answered.

Lee cringed. "Ah, you somehow saw that, aye? Let me guess, by the videos those giggling twats filmed on their cells?"

"So it _was_ you that fell?" Cas stepped forward. "But you're not an angel."

"Technically no. I'm not. I'm a Seraphim. Which would of course answer your question as to why I don't possess a soul, and don't require a human vessel." He smirked. "Your thoughts practically scream at me, and no, Dean- I'm not a liar or a demon, or a monster. So you can stop asking yourself that."

Dean scrunched his face up at having his mind read.

The blood had drained from my face, to the point I felt as though I was going to pass out. I had to eventually lower my weapon and try to steady my stance as much as possible. If Lee could definitely hear peoples thoughts so openly I hoped to god he was hearing mine right about now- Because they were screaming for him to keep quiet about who I was.

Obviously he heard everything I thought because he looked straight at me and smiled.

"Someone wanna fill me in here?" Dean shouted. "What the hell is a Seraphim?"

"An extinct species." Cas answered. "Or, what we believed was an extinct species. They were once the highest ranking celestial beings in heaven."

Dean lowered his weapon slightly. "Ok, and? Are we supposed to start freakin out and throwing holy oil?"

"No." Lee said. "That's not necessary. I'm not your enemy, Dean."

"How do we know that's the truth?" Sam just barely glanced at me, he looked about as pale as I felt.

"Because, contrary to popular belief the Seraphim are always truthful. It's not necessary for us to lie because there really is no reason to do so."

"And why is that?" Dean didn't seem to be relaxing at all.

"We're omnipotent. That's why."

"Well, good for you." Dean took aim. "You have five seconds to explain why you're here or we're gonna start firing."

He sighed and shook his head. "I've been sitting back and relaxing for the better part of a millennia, but every now and then I would listen in on what the fellow angels in heaven happened to say. Needless to say that I was surprised to hear that Lucifer had been released from his cage and it was the onset to the apocalypse. I thought, perhaps it would be a good time for me to emerge from my hiding spot and lend a helping hand to the two daft imbeciles who were trying to stop it."

"Not to nit-pick here." I said. "But, how do we know you are who you say you are?"

"Well I would say I could prove it, but with humanity holding no knowledge what so ever to my kind, how would you know the difference?"

Dean inched closer to Castiel.

"Cas? Any ideas?"

"I am just as knowledged to the Seraphim as you are. I have never seen one in the flesh before."

I tried to ignore how his eyes just barely shifted to me.

"But perhaps I could ask a question." Cas went on. "If you truly are a Seraphim, then how do you explain how you managed to avoid the executions?"

"Simple enough. I hid. Not exactly the most gallant thing to do, but it kept me alive." Lee shrugged.

"And if you're a Seraphim, then how are you here on earth. So we believed, your kind was to never act out unless directly commanded by God himself."

"True. But, after centuries and centuries of hearing nothing from our Father, one tends to realize that perhaps they would be better off obeying only themselves." He moved closer, placing his hands in his pockets. "You know, all of this could be solved, Castiel- If you only read my thoughts."

Sam and Dean inched closer to him.

"Cas... Is that a good idea?" Dean asked.

"It would solve the mystery, yes." He sighed, then approached Lee. After staring into his eyes for nearly thirty seconds his head lowered. "He's telling the truth."

"About everything?" Still, Dean wouldn't lower his gun.

"Yes. Everything. He is what he claims to be, and... There is no ill will detected."

Finally Dean lowered his gun, but still kept it pointed at Lee.

"Why don't I feel any better?" He asked.

"Yeah, same here." Sam added.

Lee smiled and let out a sigh, clapping his hands together. "Well, this has been fun. But I believe it's time I made my exit."

"So, you're leaving just like that?" I lied my gun aside. "You feel you've explained everything enough?"

"Yes, I have. Castiel knows the truth about me and since the lot of you seem to be pals, I figure you would take his word to heart. Besides, in case you've forgotten, my species were eradicated- Which means that eventually those pesky archangels will realize I'm still alive and try to finish the job. I need to keep moving."

Instead of poofing away or vanishing like most angels or demons usually did, he turned and strode out of the garage. Naturally we followed after him but once reaching where he should have been he was gone.

* * *

Dean entered Bobbys den, leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed. Had Castiel or Sam actually taken the time to look at him, they would have noticed his stern expression.

"Ok, so. Lara's out like a light." He said.

Sam looked up from his laptop. "She's sleeping? It's three in the afternoon."

"Yeah, well I put a little knock-out powder in her beer with lunch. She won't be waking up anytime soon."

"Wait a second... You roofied our sister?"

"That's right. Because, Cas and me are gonna have a little talk." He stepped inside and stood in front of the angel. "Aren't we, Cas?"

Castiel actually didn't have to fake his ignorance this time around- He genuinely had no idea what this was about.

"What is it you want to discuss?" He asked.

"I think you know. And you're gonna be honest with me. You know something, it's been obvious since the second Lara showed up- And since I'm her brother, you're gonna tell me what you know."

Castiel looked to Sam for reassurance, but Sam could only let out a sigh.

"Dean- I don't know what you're..."

"Don't lie to me, man. You're terrible at it. I can see right through you. Now, tell me what's going on. First, Lucifer is after Lara, and now suddenly this supposed to be extinct walking atom-bomb shows up offering her help. Why?"

Castiels eyes were noticeably wide. The one person he hated lying to the most would know now for certain that he had indeed been keeping secrets. Dean was one of his closest friends, and chances were he wouldn't forgive him for this.

"I... I can't tell you, Dean. I gave Lara my word."

"Too bad. You're just gonna have to break your word. Now start talking, tell me what the hell is going on." Dean practically had Castiel pinned against the wall. "Look, man- I get it. I really do. She's good, she is. She bats those pretty eyes and can make a guy do anything. And I realize that you probably believe you're helping her by keeping her secrets, but... You're not. If anything it could make things even worse. You want to help her? Then tell me what I need to know."

Yet again Castiel looked to Sam, and the only response he got from him was a slight nod. So it was apparent that even Sam agreed this couldn't be held back any longer. With that, he met Deans eyes and finally spoke.

"Lara is also a Seraphim."

For a moment Deans face went completely blank, before he took a step back and let out half a laugh.

"What? That's crap... She is not."

"Yes, she is."

"How is that even possible? She's our sister?" Dean looked to Sam, going stiff once he realized that his little brother wasn't in an uproar. "Whoa whoa. Wait a friggin second- You're not surprised... You knew about this?"

Sam closed his laptop and stood. "Yeah... I knew."

"What the hell? For how long?"

"Not long... Almost two months."

Dean tried to count to ten so he wouldn't explode, but didn't make it. Unfortunately a stack of books felt his wrath as he kicked them across the room.

"I'm sorry, Dean." Cas said.

"Don't friggin say sorry to me. Just explain how the hell this is possible." Dean sat down on the sofa and took his head into his hands.

Castiel and Sam both took turns explaining the situation. Every detail that they were both aware of they spoke. Castiel told him about the journal and its contents, and how Lara had no idea what she really was until that night all those weeks ago. And even though they understood somewhat why Lucifer might have wanted her, they still weren't completely certain of his motives. Dean listened through the entire thing completely mute with his eyes glued to the floor. Once both men went silent, he finally peeled them away.

"Why didn't anyone tell me?" He asked. "She should have told me."

Sam rolled his eyes "Uh, Dean. Do you blame her for not telling you?"

He stood. "Yes! Why wouldn't she?! What reason would she have to keep something like this a secret?"

"Maybe because she knew you'd react like this? Think about it- She knew how you were once you found out about me and the demon blood. You still haven't let me live that mistake down- In her mind, she thought you would think she's a monster."

"This is different." Dean began to pace.

"But how would she know that?"

"Because..." He stopped, the anger had completely faded. "I'm her brother, she's my little sister. She should have realized that I wouldn't hate her over this."

Sam gave half a smile. "Then tell her that, because she'll need to hear it."

Dean leaned against the desk and shook his head. "So this book. The spell you're talkin about. Where is it?"

"Why do you want to know, Dean?" Cas asked.

"Because I think I have the right to know."

"We'll leave that decision up to Lara." Sam protested. "She's gonna be pissed enough once she realized we spilled her secret."


	20. Chapter 20

I awoke after dark in a fog as thick as pea soup. Honestly I couldn't even remember falling asleep. The last thing I remembered was having a beer with Dean, and then... Lights out. Now, I know it wasn't from the beer- Because, even though it wasn't something I liked to brag about, I could drink anyone under the table. It wasn't simply because I was exhausted, because... I always was, and that never helped me sleep before.

And, as I rolled out of bed, successfully falling to the floor on my knees it dawned on me- Dean had been alone with my beer while I heated up some left over pizza.

That dick... He drugged me! I just knew it. And the only reason why I could think as to why he would have, was because they had some sort of job they wanted to leave me out of.

Steaming, I pulled myself to my feet and stomped out of Bobbys guest bedroom. After a momentary dizzy spell, which forced me to lean against the wall and steady myself- I started off again and flew down the stairs. I expected to see the house completely empty but for my usual babysitter Cas. So, when I rounded the corner and entered the den my feet skidded to a stop when I saw everyone was still here.

Ok... Maybe I was wrong. Maybe Dean didn't knock me out...

"Hey, Lara." Sam said first. "Have a nice nap?"

"What the hell is going on?" No, they might not have ditched me again but there was definitely something up. Sam and Cas both looked incredibly guilty.

It was the sort of guilt that said they had done something very very bad. The sort of guilt that said "I'm sorry for running over your cat" or something to that extent. Seeing is that neither of them would look me in the eye, naturally I began to panic.

Dean however, stood from the sofa and walked towards me. He didn't look pissed, he didn't really have much as far as expressions went. But when he reached me, he took me by surprise when he grabbed me and pulled me into a tight hug.

"It'll be ok." He said. "We'll figure this out."

I looked over his shoulder to Sam, questioning him with my eyes. He must have understand what I was trying to "say" because he nodded and mouthed. "He knows."

My stomach dropped to my feet, if Dean squeezed me any harder I would have thrown up all over him. After he finally pulled away he kept his hands on my shoulders as he stared me in the eye.

"What do you know?" I asked, fearing the worst.

"Everything. And like I said, we'll figure this out."

"Figure what out, Dean? There's nothing to figure out..." I pulled away and started to pace. "Thanks a lot you two. You really don't know how to keep your fat mouths shut."

Sam let out a raspy sigh while Cas hanged his head in shame.

"If you wanna blow up at them later, go head." Dean went on. "But like it or not, we gotta talk about this."

"There's nothing to talk about." I fell onto the sofa. "I don't want to acknowledge this. I just want to ignore it. This isn't something that I'm happy about, Dean. It scares the hell outa me. I just want it to go away."

He nodded, then sat beside me. "I get that. And, whatever you want to do, we'll do it. If you want to just completely forget about it. Fine, we'll do that. If you want to..." He paused, not able to form the correct words. "If you wanna dig into this deeper, we'll do that too."

"I definitely do _not _want to dig deeper into it. If anything I would want to go get that damned book and burn it."

Deans lips just barely flinched into a smile. "I think that's a good idea."

My eyes flew to his. "You do?"

"Yeah. Not only would we be doin what you want, which is ignoring it- But without that book you stay just the way you are right now. Which means Lucifer would have no reason to come after you... It's a win win situation."

Now, I was in no way a chick that cried over any tender moment- But just knowing Dean was on my side and not disowning me, well... It was hard not to.

"Guys... Can I say something?" Sam asked.

"You don't get to talk, butt-hole. Mr big mouth." I snapped back.

"Ok, fine, you can be mad at me all you want, but it got to the point where we couldn't keep this a secret anymore, Lara. And once you're not pissed at me or Cas anymore you'll realize that. But, what I wanted to say is- Is burning the book really such a good idea?"

Both Dean and I glared at him.

"Why wouldn't it be a good idea?" Dean replied.

"Now don't get me wrong. It's not like I don't want to respect Laras wishes. But think about it- What if someday in the future she decides she wants to explore this, it will be too late... She would have destroyed the only object in the world that could tell her about her heritage." His faced hardened slightly. "And, I know you won't like hearing this, but... What if it got to the point where we really needed those dormant powers?"

"You're kidding me, Sam!" Dean jumped to his feet. "So, what- Now that you know what Lara is you just wanna use her?"

"No! That's not what I'm saying at all. But what if this whole Lucifer deal could be easily done away with because of her? What if she's the missing piece to the puzzle? It would explain why Lucifer might want her, because he knows she's the only one that could take him down?"

Just as always Cas' scrunched his eyebrows in thought. "I'm hesitant to admit this but Sam might be right. The Seraphim were far more powerful than any archangel. Even Lucifer."

"I don't care! We're not gonna use our sister as a devil smiting weapon. End of story." Dean grabbed his beer from the desk, but after staring at it, threw the bottle across the room. "This isn't our call. It's Laras. And if she wants to burn the damn book, then that's what we'll do."

Sam admitted defeat by not mentioning it again, as did Cas.

"So, is that what you wanna do, shorty?" Dean asked. "Do you want to burn it?"

I didn't even have to think twice. "Yes... Definitely."

He nodded. "Alright then. Cas, since you know where the book is- Go get it. We're gonna have us a little bonfire."

Cas could only nod before fluttering away. And just as the last time he was only gone a few seconds before returning with the box in hand. Seeing is that I didn't give him the key this time around, and judging by the state of the box which was now dented and twisted beyond belief- He seemed to have just yanked it out of its slot.

We each followed Dean outside and around the side of the house to an old trash barrel in the back. He wadded up some old newspapers and stuffed it inside, then a few broken sticks and other burnable material before motioning me over.

"You sure you wanna do this?" He asked, his eyes stern.

"Positive."

"Ok." Now he looked to Cas who still held the box. "Wanna rip it out of there?"

Like he was opening a can of sardines he tore the metal box until the top was completely peeled away- Afterwards he removed the book, just as gingerly as he had the first time, and handed it to me.

I didn't hesitate to toss it in the barrel and Dean doused everything in lighter fluid. Once I was certain it would burn for all eternity, he reached into his jacket and pulled out a lighter.

After it was in my hand he stepped back to stand beside Sam and left me alone. For a moment I could only stand there with the lighter in my hand, my eyes were locked onto that journal which was now soaked in lighter fluid. Of course there was a part of me that was regretting having to do this. After all, it was my Mother who wrote it. But, it was a part of me that I wasn't ready to face. And something told me that no matter how much time passed, I never _would _be ready.

So I flicked the lighter a good five times before the spark ignited then tossed it in the barrel.

A poof of fire shot up in the air a good two feet as everything inside immediately began to be eaten up.

I watched the leather of the journal blacken, the pages inside were wilting and melting away. The one thing I was certain held answers, the one thing that John had given me was being destroyed. Somehow... I couldn't find it in me to be sorry for that.

The contents of the barrel were engulfed by now, and I could no longer see the book at the bottom but I still couldn't tare my eyes away from the fire. I could hear Sam and Dean whispering to each other from behind me, but couldn't make out their words. When Cas stood beside me, he as well stared down at the fire.

There were no words spoken, but at a quick glance I could see somehow that he was, in his own way, apologizing for having told Dean about me. But, I wasn't angry with him. It would be silly to be. I knew eventually the truth would have to come out. If anything I should have actually thanked him- Because now I wouldn't have to walk around with this nervous pit in my stomach any longer. So, I guess to show him that I wasn't angry, I looked up at him and gave half a smile. Yeah, he looked relieved and actually returned one- Which didn't happen very often.

* * *

The next morning Bobby finally returned from his hunt- And as I was in the shower Sam and Dean filled him in on everything that had transpired the night before. But, Bobby wasn't exactly surprised to hear what I was. Even though he didn't know the exact details, he knew there was something about me that John was desperate to keep hidden. Of course he wasn't exactly thrilled with learning everything- But he was more pissed at John for having stowed me away somewhere instead of keeping me with family that could keep me safe. As I descended the stairs I barely heard him mutter something along the lines of "John was a coward".

As I listened at the door like a sneaky little brat, Dean went on to say that after today- The events of the night before wouldn't be spoken of again unless_ I _brought it up. Otherwise, we were just going to forget it ever happened and life would go on as it had been. I wasn't anything other than Lara Winchester, a normal girl, and the mention of Seraphim was a non negotiable subject. As far as Lee went, well- Dean was content with blasting him off the planet if he had the ability. Me? Well, I wouldn't go that far. No, I wasn't ready to dance a jig of glee with having this snippy six winged douche-bag in my life, but if he was really serious about helping us out- Then why not use that to our advantage? I mean, yeah, it might come in handy to have a dude that could burn an archangel to a cinder with a single thought.

"What are you doing?" Cas suddenly said from behind me.

I swung around quickly and pushed my hand over his mouth, grabbing him by the tie and pulling him out of site.

"Lesson number 1 on spying on someones conversation." I whispered. "Be quiet and don't be seen."

I pushed my finger to my lips with my free hand and shushed him. He nodded and I pulled my hand away from his face.

It was hilarious watching him back against the wall as we both listened to the kitchen conversation.

"Why are we spying?" He whispered.

"Just precaution."

He didn't understand, obviously- And unfortunately there really wasn't much else said that was of any interest. So after lingering behind the wall for another minute, I finally moved away and entered the kitchen.

"Mornin." Sam said with his mouth full.

Since Dean had made it clear what happened yesterday was not to be mentioned- Bobby just gave me a kind smile and went back to flipping bacon on the stove.

"Hey..." I slumped into the chair across from Sam and tried to let the awkwardness fade.

Dean slid a plate in front of me and served a helping of scrambled eggs. "So we might have a lead on a horseman." he announced."

"Really?" Finally everything from the night before disappeared. "Where?"

"Lexington Kentucky. There's been some pretty crazy shit goin on there."

"Such as?"

Sam dropped his fork and motioned towards his laptop. "People are dying in, well... Let's just say it's far from normal. One man, a Henry Billings, pretty much stuffed himself to death with, get this... Peanuts."

"Peanuts?" I arched my brows.

"Yeah... Peanuts. He ate enough that his stomach actually exploded."

"Chock full 'o' nuts." Dean grinned.

Sam ignored his bad joke. "And, another man Thomas White-" He blew out a puff of air. "Well let's just say he watched porn for so long, he starved to death."

After cringing I yet again looked up at Dean and he continued to grin.

"He beat himself to death." He said, winking.

"Oh god." I face-palmed.

"I don't understand." Cas tilted his head. "He beat himself to death? How does one inflict that much injury on to themselves?"

I reached over and latched onto Deans arm. "Don't, Dean. No dirty hand motions. Just explain it to him normally."

He frowned at that, but whispered to Cas so he would understand. Afterwards, Cas' eyes got all shifty again.

"That... That would require-" He swallowed. "Never mind."

"Moving on-" Sam said. "There are several other deaths just as weird as those two. A teenager smoked so much pot that her brain literally shut down, a man drank himself to death with gallons upon gallons of water, just plain old water. And an elderly man downed every single bottle of meds he had in his bathroom cabinet."

"Sounds like we got famine on our hands." Bobby said.

"Yeah, which sounds like it's gonna be another fun filled hunting trip." Dean scowled. "But, at least we won't be nasty with diseases."

"Yeah, we might just... I don't know. Gorge ourselves with cheese-burgers or something." Sam replied.

"When do we leave?" I asked.

"Asap." Dean stuffed his last few strips of bacon in his mouth. "We gotta get this guy before he moves on to another town."

After breakfast we packed up everything we needed, and Bobby said he'd follow us to Lexington. After the trouble Sam and Dean had last time, he wasn't taking no for an answer.

It took around ten hours to make the drive, and by the time we pulled into the city limits, the first thing we did was find a motel. It was too late to do any investigating, which meant we would have to wait until morning. So far, with having been in town for an hour- No one was experiencing any weird symptoms, but I highly doubted that we would get lucky enough to not start wigging out.

Not even ten minutes after getting our room, Sam had found two more strange deaths that just happened within the last day. A woman doing yoga, somehow wrapped herself into a literal human pretzel and suffocated. From what he read from the police reports- They were having trouble unfolding the woman and was going to have to resort to sawing off her limbs. The second death, a man, had been swimming laps in a gym pool to the extent he gave himself a massive stroke and drowned. According to the gym manager, he had been swimming for three hours without stopping for a break.

"This is just getting more weird." Sam said, closing his laptop. "What the hell is going to happen to us?"

"I don't wanna know." Dean said, flopping down on the bed. "But I'm sure it's not gonna be pretty."

"Hopefully we'll be able to have some self control." I said. "I don't exactly want to fold myself into a pretzel, or porn myself to death."

"It seems that Famine just forces someone to go to the extreme when it comes to some sort of addiction, or hobby. For instance, yoga girl was an instructor, and she just didn't stop-" Sam made hand motions. "Bending herself."

"Ok, so we just avoid things we really really like." Dean sighed. "Guess that means no cheese-burgers or beer."

"But, that doesn't really make sense." I said. "Cause that one dude died from drinking gallons of water. I don't think water can be an addiction or hobby."

"Famine makes you feel hunger." Cas said. "Whether it be for food, drink or anything in between. You feel as though you can never get enough."

This wasn't going to be pleasant. One second we could be merrily enjoying our frosted flakes, the next second we could be jamming them down our throats with our own fists. We needed to find this guy before one our stomachs exploded.


	21. Chapter 21

Any little hunger pain I got the next morning I started to freak out. And, I kept my eyes locked on my brothers like a frickin hawk just waiting for them to start to feel the effects of Famine. But, they were fine, and so was I so far- So after taking a trip to the coroner and learning as much as we could, not that it mattered- We knew what was causing this. We started off to... I don't know where.

We had no idea how to fine this horseman. Since apparently the King of hell Crowley helped the boys out the last time, we were basically screwed. Basically the only thing we could do was drive around aimlessly and hoped to come across a particular house or building that was swarming with demons. Not exactly the best and most clever approach, but hey- You work with what you got.

Castiel flew around the city trying to find something strange, but came back with nothing. When we stopped at a gas station to fill up the impala and grab something to drink, I paced the isles with Sams drink of choice. Bottled water... Yummy. I grabbed a coke for Dean and I and went up to pay.

Bobby had said the night before that he'd call us if he came across anything, and since we hadn't heard from him since last night I figured he'd been driving around investigating. So when he finally called Deans cell and announced he might have found something, we immediately took off across town.

Whatever he found was right in the middle of downtown Lexington, where it was the most frequented. The traffic was ridiculous and by the time we found Bobby waiting by his car in a back alley, the sun had already long sense set. He explained that there seemed to be an overly eager staff working until the late hours in an office building, and there was an abundance of well dressed "guards" patrolling every door. Even though he couldn't get close enough to thoroughly examine them, he was almost certain they were demons.

While he and Dean went over a map of the city trying to create some sort of plan, I stood off to the side and tried to understand what was happening. How was it that we had been here for a day and a half and somehow we were unaffected by Famine? Dean and Sam both seemed fine and dandy, Bobby, well- For the moment he seemed normal. And Cas was an angel so I highly doubted Famine would hit him. So far it all seemed too easy and I wasn't sure why.

If it was indeed a horseman we were dealing with, then we should have been going bonkers by now. But, maybe it was the same as with Pestilence? When Sam and Dean entered the building where he was hiding, then is when they were stricken with sickness. Maybe it was the same this time around? Maybe Famine only affected those who were in a close proximity.

After we parked across the street from the office building, I stared through a pair of binoculars and noticed the guards Bobby spoke of. There were at least six walking the grounds, all dressed in black suits.

"Take a look." I said, handing the binocs to Sam.

"Six in total... Cas, what do you make of them?" He asked.

"They're demons. All of them."

"Great." Dean snatched the binocs from Sam. "So that means the entire place is crawling with them. Even inside."

"I could easily dispose of them." Cas added.

"Yeah, and alert Famine that we're here while you're at it. But, who knows. He might already know we're here." Dean tossed the binocs to the seat. "So, who's for going in guns blazing?"

"Good idea, Dean." I snapped. "Let's just run into a building full of demons. Yeah, we have the knife and Cas. But neither can be in more than one place at the same time."

"Fine, smart-ass. What do you suggest we do?"

I went silent, contemplating on whether or not I should actually say this out loud. While Sam would probably be all for my idea, Dean definitely would not be. It was one thing to overlook what I was, but it was another to put our trust into someone we didn't even know.

"What about Lee?" I finally spat out. "He could, I dunno... Maybe help?"

Dean began to grumble under his breath. "I don't trust the dude."

"But you trusted Crowley? He's a demon. And you heard what Cas said- Lee was telling us the truth and he wasn't here to hurt us."

Sam turned and looked at Dean, shrugging. "She has a point. You didn't even think twice about calling up Crowley. At least this Lee guy wouldn't expect anything in return, like our _souls _for instance."

Dean watched my reflection from the rear view mirror. I knew why he didn't want to ask Lee for help. It was because Lee was the same as myself- Which would be a constant reminder that I wasn't normal. Maybe in a way Dean didn't exactly accept me for what I was- Not that I blamed him. I didn't accept it either and wanted to completely ignore it. So, yeah. Calling Lee, a _Seraphim_ wasn't exactly ignoring it.

"Call him." Dean relented. "We can't be picky right now."

* * *

To my surprise Lee appeared with only having to call him once. When he was suddenly standing beside the impala, dressed in the same black overcoat and brandishing the same smug smile- Dean didn't hesitate to let his annoyance show.

We piled out of the car and surrounded him, while Cas, for the moment- Seemed to eye him like a bug he wanted to step on. Bobby, could only stare at him with a sort of amazed confusion. Almost like he wasn't sure what he was looking at, even though he looked completely human.

"I would ask why you called me here, but now that I see that building crawling with hell-spawn I don't need to." Lee cocked his head to the side, smirking at me. "So, what do you need me to do?"

"What can you do?" Dean asked. "You're an angel, sort of- We know what Cas is capable of, but you're a mystery."

"First of all-" Lee held up his finger. "Let us get one thing perfectly clear. I am putting myself at great risk by assisting you- Don't forget that I've been in hiding for centuries. The more I jet around the countryside and the more I use my abilities, the sooner it will be that Michael or Raphael realize I'm alive. Which, in turn, would not bode well for you lot. Because if I'm killed..." He yet again eyed me. "You would be without a Seraphim. Lara might have been born as half, but that doesn't mean she is much aid. Not with that spell snuffing out her powers."

"What's your point?" Sam asked.

"My point is, is that as much as I would like to roast the archangels to a crisp, I can't let them find out I'm alive. So, I'll help you retrieve your bloody rings but that's as far as it goes. I don't want to hurt your feelings, lads- But I'm not here to be your guard dog. I'm here for Lara. Because, other than myself, she is the last of my kind. I don't exactly fancy the thought of her being taken and used by Lucifer." He moved closer to Dean who was giving him his evil"I hate you" face. "So that means I can't take down Lucifer. Not because it's not within my capabilities, but because if I risk trying I very well might be killed."

"You're lying." Cas suddenly said, his eyes squinted. "Why?"

Sam and Dean immediately rose their guns.

"Oh for goodness sakes put those damn things down-" Lee rolled his eyes. "You can't kill me with that, so it would be a waste of ammunition."

"Answer Cas' question then." Dean said. "It might not kill you but putting a bullet between your eyes might sting."

"True..." Lee lightly pushed his way from our circle and stopped in front of the impala. "You want the truth? The truth is, is that I have my orders. And my orders were to not interfere with the interactions between Lucifer and Michael."

"Who gave you such orders?" Castiel followed after him. "You claimed that God has been missing for centuries."

"Well that was a lie, in a way. God has been missing... Or should I say, hiding. From you and your siblings. Particularly the archangels- Because, they have a thorn in their backsides and instead of staying and punishing his little brats he decided to leave. After thousands upon thousands of years of their petty wallowing, he had enough. To my knowledge, I'm the only one he's kept in contact with. So, I'm still following my orders like a good little soldier- And my orders were to ensure that Lucifer did not get his hands on Lara by any means necessary. If that includes helping you retrieve the horsemens rings to throw him back in his cage, so be it. But I'm not to interfere with anything else."

Castiel looked furious, which was something I was not accustomed to seeing.

"Where is God? I have been searching for him for months and..."

"He's where he wants to be. If he wanted to be found then you would know it. Just know that he's well aware of what's happening here and he gets involved when it's completely necessary. For example... If one of you bumbling buffoons goes and gets yourselves knocked off. Castiel, weren't you curious as to how you came back after Raphael killed you?"

"If he's so aware of the crap that's going down, then why isn't he putting a stop to it?" Dean asked.

"Because he can't. Prophecies must play out as they were written and must not be tampered with."

"So that means _God _wants the apocalypse to happen?" Sam lowered his gun as a few pedestrians walked past.

Lee shrugged. "I can't answer that question because I don't know the prophecies. I didn't write them."

My brothers naturally looked pissed. Castiel looked like someone had just broken his favorite toy.

"Well this is just awesome." Dean pinched the bridge of his nose. "We can't even count on God to stop this fight. So that means we gotta do it on our own."

"Not like we didn't already plan on that." Sam replied.

"But still... You'd think he'd want to step in and give us a hand." Bobby said.

Lee smirked. "He did... I'm here aren't I? And trust me, I'm better than absolutely nothing."

"Whatever, let's just do this already and get the fuck out of Kentucky." Dean opened the trunk and started handing out weapons, naturally Lee declined using one, as did Cas. "So, here's the plan. Cas, Bobby and Lara, go in the back. Mr Fireball will come with me and Sammy."

"Not to offend, but you boys are not my charge. Lara is." Lee said.

"Yeah well, you're an asshole and I don't trust you, so- Until I do, that means I trust Cas to watch out for my sister more than you." Dean barked.

Lee looked at me and winked- And I could definitely tell why Dean hated the guy so much. He was a cocky s.o.b if I've ever seen one.

"So what can you do in there?" I asked. "Since you're not to get involved, are you even useful?"

"I'm useful as far as obliterating demons if that's what you mean. God is certainly happy to have as many demons destroyed as possible. So that shouldn't be an issue."

"What about Famine? What can you do about him?"

He thought for a moment, allowing himself to gawk at the office building across the street.

"Unfortunately it's up to you all to retrieve his ring. I can go as far as burning the demons, but I cannot get involved with a horseman directly. But, if it's any consolation, he isn't nearly as spry as Pestilence. He relies on targeting peoples weaknesses or addictions, things they wouldn't be able to resist- So, if you have any will power at all, I would suggest channeling it."

Dean shrugged. "Sounds easy enough."

"Yeah-" Sam rolled his eyes. "As long as a naked woman covered in pie doesn't fall in front of you, you'll be just fine."

Dean thought about that for a moment and a slight smile crept across his face, which he quickly shook away.

"Ok, let's go."

Actually getting across the street without being seen was a chore all in itself. Not only did we have to battle the constant traffic, but Famine apparently knew what he was doing by positioning himself in an area of the city that was crowded. Chances were he felt safer that way, because what hunters in their right mind would come after him with so many innocent bystanders? Uh... We would. No, we didn't want anyone getting hurt- But the way we figured it, if we didn't take this guy out and soon, even more people would be dying in odd and quite frankly, disturbing ways.

The last I saw Sam, Dean and Lee- They were hiding behind a set of tall preened bushes. There were three demons guarding the front entrance, and the back was still unknown. But as Cas, Bobby and I rounded the back, hiding behind our own sets of bushes and random objects such as a dumpster and parked cars- Cas rose his hand and motioned for us to duck.

After we did, he examined the area and then crouched beside us.

"There are four demons patrolling the back entrance." He whispered. "I can easily subdue them."

In case you didn't know, subdue for Cas generally meant icing them.

"Well, you're the only demon weapon we have." Bobby said. "So, I guess we just gotta take the risk of bein heard."

"Stay here, don't come out until the screaming has ceased." He commanded.

Bobby and I did as he said and kept our guns ready. Cas finally stood and walked straight for the demons at the door.

I couldn't exactly see him killing the demons, but heard the screams and saw bright flashes of white light. After hearing the bodies hit the concrete all was silent.

Slowly I inched my way to the front of the car we crouched behind and peaked around, noticing Cas was standing alone but for the bodies surrounding him. He gave me a nod and Bobby and I jogged across the parking lot to join him.

The backdoor was locked of course, but Cas only yanked it off its hinges. Not exactly stealthy, but the chances of Famine not knowing we were there was slim to none. Not only would he have heard the shrieking demons, but there were three other men in the front of the building reeking havoc.

We started through the halls with Cas leading the group. It didn't take long for demons to start running at us. Bobby and I started unloading salt rounds into their chests, which stumbled them, but not for long. We pretty much relied on Cas using his angel mojo to take them out. Which he did, quite consistently and without hesitation. He didn't flinch even once as demon after demon was killed with a shriek and blast of light. When we reached the end of the hall, which split into two others- We stopped just in time to see a demon completely engulfed in flames run screaming past.

The only thing we could do was watch him running, swinging his arms and wailing before falling to the ground and eventually disintegrating to nothing but black ash.

"Well... That was interesting." Bobby said.

We continued on in the direction the flaming demon had came from, and the farther we descended the hall the more piles of smoldering black ashes we stepped over. Lee was apparently keeping himself busy. By the time we met up with them, Lee had just set another group of around five demons on fire. Sam and Dean looked momentarily stunned by the actions, and judging how clean Sams knife happened to be- He obviously hadn't had the chance to use it on a single demon.

Dean watched the five crumble into ash before standing tall and shaking away the surprise.

"Your way clear?" He asked.

"For the moment." Cas answered.

"Let's head upstairs then." Dean led the way now to the stairs, instead of the elevator.

We started climbing up to the second level and stopped at the door.

"We stay together now." Dean continued. "Famine will be up here somewhere."

My oldest brother obviously had something to prove because he went through the door first, followed by Cas. I was the last to exit, seeing is that everyone squeezed by me- And as the door slowly creaked close I was slightly unnerved to see hallway all but completely dark.

There were security lights at the exit behind us, and one at the end of the hall. But it was barely enough illumination to put me at ease. Considering this place was full of demons, oh and yeah of course, a frickin horseman- I would have preferred it to be as bright as the sun.

We didn't know which direction to go so Dean simply guessed and we started off to the left. But we weren't more than half way down the hall when suddenly Sam drew in a sharp breath and stopped dead in his tracks.

"What is it, Sammy?" Dean asked. "What's wrong?"

Sams jaw was clenched, there was a look in his eyes that I had never seen before. He no longer carried that sweet puppy dog face, instead now he looked more along the lines of a maniacal killer hellbent on destruction.

He grunted slightly before shaking his head.

"Y-you have to go on without me." Sweat was starting to form on his temples and upper lip. "I can smell them."

His voice was shaking, as was his clenched fists.

"What are you talking about?" Dean inched closer.

"The demons." Sam forced out, he leaned against the wall to try and steady himself. "It must be Famine... He's close."

Dean and I exchanged worried glances- We hadn't experienced anything as of yet, neither did Bobby. But of course we had never done something as extreme as drinking demon blood either.

I grabbed Sams wrist and gave it a firm yank. "Snap out of it, Sam. Don't let it take you. Keep remembering that you're stronger than that." He didn't seem to hear me, his eyes were fixed on a door nearly ten feet from us. "I swear to god I _will _hit you if you don't snap out of it."

"Cas, maybe you should get him outa here." Dean said.

"No... No." Sam took a deep breath. "I'm ok- I'll be ok."

"You sure?"

"Yeah... I just need to think about something else."

It was clear Dean was panicked now, his mind wasn't focused on the mission anymore- But on Sammy. He had to force himself to start walking again, and when we came to the door that Sam had been eyeballing, Lee suddenly stopped.

"This is the farthest I can go." He said.

I froze. "What? You're kidding?"

"I'm sorry. But I told you I have my orders."

Well fantastic, he bails on us just at the grand finale. But I couldn't exactly cuss him out or beat the crap out of him right now, so I would have to do it later.

Cas waited for the go ahead before reaching for the door handle. But, just as he was about to grip it the door suddenly flew open and a wave of demons rushed out and slammed against him. He was thrown back against the wall by three, while the remaining five charged at the rest of us. I started shooting, popping off salt rounds one by one. Dean and Bobby did the same.

They didn't stop as they completely ignored us and headed straight for Sam. He was tackled and knocked to the floor but successfully jammed the knife into one mans stomach. As soon as the demon was dead and the blood was on that knife, Sam went into a trance.

He stared at it like a drunk drools over his booze, his finger just lightly trailed over the blade and he scraped it clean. No matter how much we shouted at him, or Dean screamed, he didn't seem to hear. If we didn't intervene somehow then he was going to go off the deep end.

Suddenly a thought struck me, granted it was incredibly stupid and risky- But it was the only way. Famine needed to be taken down, and we couldn't do it on our own.

I remembered what Lee had said outside before we entered the office building. He claimed that he was ordered to protect me, and to not get involved unless I was in danger. Well... Me running straight up to a horseman might just qualify as danger.

There wasn't the time to sit and ponder over this, I had seconds if that. So I blasted through the demons eventually running out of ammo- Throwing punches instead was my second option. I somehow managed to squeeze my way past the demons and run into the room.

By this time Dean was screaming at me, calling me every name in the book. Sam was oblivious to what was going on and Bobby was struggling against a demon who brandished a tire iron as a weapon. Cas was zapping the ones who tried to pin him against the wall and Lee looked angry enough to spit fire... Literally...

When I finally stopped inside the middle of the room there were two demons standing beside an old man in a wheelchair. He looked frail, thin and knocking on deaths door. On his right hand was another gaudy ring and it actually took a moment for me to realize that this old decrepit piece of crap was the horseman. How that was possible was beyond me, he barely looked strong enough to blink.

I didn't wait for him to speak, knowing that Sam was almost out of time. So I charged at him, pulling my knife from my belt. If Lee was going to jump in then now was the best time to do it.

This wasn't going to end well, I knew that. Chances were it would get my ass killed or severely maimed- But that was the point. Lee would only act out if my life was in danger, and running full force at a horseman wasn't going to leave me with giggles and fluffy bunnies.

I made it halfway across the room when I was suddenly flung backwards, but someone caught me and broke my fall. Judging by the strength and tan coat-sleeves I knew it was Cas.

We both fell to the floor with a thud, but I somehow managed to pull away and charge yet again. This was so incredibly stupid, just my luck Lee wouldn't step in and I would suddenly be lying in pieces with my guts ripped out. I ignored everyone screaming at me and took a flying leap. Well, this was it... I was either going to succeed in my kamikaze mission, or Lee was going to fry him.

Neither happened.

It was as if I slammed into an invisible wall, as I slumped back to the floor. Lee was standing directly behind the horsemans wheelchair and the two demons beside him burst into flames. He reached around and wrapped his arms across the old mans chest as he started to flail and squeal.

Lees palms were glowing a bright orange to the point I could see the veins and capillaries through his skin. The old mans black jacket began to sizzle but he wasn't on fire- I don't know if it was because Lee just wasn't trying hard enough to deep-fry him, or he simply couldn't get the job done. Either way, this wasn't working out the way I had intended. But it didn't matter because Dean burst through the door holding Sams knife and didn't hesitate to run straight over and start sawing at his finger.

When it fell off, along with the ring and hit the floor the old man suddenly burst into a cloud of black smoke and disappeared. Lee and Dean flew backwards and slid across the floors from the impact.

Once it was finally over and the screaming and fire died down, Deans jacket had several burned holes clear though down to his skin. He started swatting at himself trying to dull the sizzle and jumped back to his feet.

"What the hell was that, Lara?!" He screamed.

I didn't have the chance to answer that before Lee stomped towards me and I was backed into a wall.

"You are stupid, _stupid _little girl! Do you know that?!" He shouted. "If I didn't have my orders I would flog you right in the middle of a crowded street!"

Cas suddenly poofed in front of me and with a slam against Lees chest he went soaring across the room. He smashed against the far end wall leaving a considerably large crack in his wake. But he wasn't fazed in the slightest by the blow, instead he practically floated back to his feet and took a few deep breaths.

"Whoa, everyone just calm down!" Dean shouted, just as Bobby and Sam hobbled into the room. "We don't need to be taring each others heads off here!"

It was a contest between Cas and Lee of who could send the other the worst bone chilling stares. I shifted my eyes from man to man, not knowing what the hell was happening.

Sam limped across the room to where the finger and ring lied, then with a cringe scooped it up.

"You ok, Sammy?" Dean asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine... Now that Famine's gone." He breathed out.

"You want to explain to me what the hell you were thinking?" Lee shouted, moving his eyes to me.

I ignored him for the moment, instead deciding to try and get Cas to get that devilish look off his face.

"Dude... Calm down. You don't want to piss off a Seraphim." I whispered.

He flinched slightly before breaking his gaze from Lee.

"Answer me, Lara." Lee continued to prod. "Explain to me just what in bloody hell that was?"

"It was me improvising." I finally answered. "You said you could only get involved if I was in danger, so I put myself in danger. Sam was about to flip out and I panicked- We needed Famine gone in a hurry, so..."

I trailed off, figuring that was explanation enough. After Sam heard me, his shoulders slumped.

"You ran into a suicide mission just so I would snap out of it? I _never _asked you to do something like that."

"So what. We can't keep doing this protect the little sister bullshit. You watch my back I watch yours. That's just what we do."

Lee stuffed his hands in his pockets. "Well, this is just a lovely and touching sibling moment. Had I known how infuriating you would be, Lara- I never would have risked my safety by leaving my hiding place."

"I never asked you to leave it. As far as I'm concerned you can take a flying leap. Fuck off, I don't care what you think."

He snickered. "Apparently not. But, as I stated I have my orders now. And we don't have to like each other to work together amicably." He started for the door. "I'll be taking my leave now. Do me a favor and don't call me again for the next horseman."

Bobby scooted out of his way as he passed, watching him disappear into the dark hall.

"We need to get outa here." He said. "I hear sirens."

He was right, there were police lights swirling and sirens blaring in the distance. Our gunshots and ruckus on a crowded city street had definitely caused some attention. We quickly made our way back down the stairs, outside and back into out cars before they arrived.


	22. Chapter 22

Everyone was pissed at me to the point that they wouldn't even speak. I wasn't surprised, I knew that if I survived that whole ordeal that it would result in my brothers seething. But, I was a little surprised that even Cas was that angry. Shortly after we returned to the motel he poofed away and hadn't returned for the better part of two hours.

We ordered take out, and ate our dinner in complete silence. I tried not to let it bother me, because had it been a reverse situation I had no doubts that Sam would have done the exact same thing as myself. That's just what you do for someone you care about, especially if it's a sibling. They would get over it, they would have to because I wouldn't let them continue to give me the silent treatment.

After dinner we were getting ready to sleep- Bobby had the room next to ours and he said that after getting a couple hours of shut-eye he would start back home without us. We said our goodbyes for now, knowing that more then likely within the next couple weeks we'd be back at his house.

As I was turning down the covers Dean came out of the bathroom and shook his head.

"So you're just gonna lay down and sleep, huh? Not even gonna bother trying to explain yourself."

I shrugged and lied down. "I shouldn't have to explain myself. You wanted me to stick around and not run off? Well this is what comes with that agreement. You're gonna have to accept the fact that just like the both of you-" I pointed from Sam to Dean. "I'm just as willing to get my ass kicked if it means _yours _won't have to be."

"Lara- I appreciate what you did, I really do-" Sam said. "But, next time don't do something so dangerous."

"I'm not making any promises. Face the facts, boys- I'm your sister, a _Winchester_, which means we make bad and reckless choices all for the sake of family. Don't like it? Kiss my ass."

My head fell against the pillows and I pulled the blankets up to cover my shoulders. I just barely heard Dean chuckle.

"What'd I tell ya, Sammy? She's too much like us for her own damn good."

"Yeah, well. That's the curse of being in this family, I guess."

"Can still hear you." I mumbled, pulling the covers up higher.

"Get some sleep, kiddo." Sam walked over, mussed my hair, then lied down as well in his own bed.

Morning came relatively quickly, and for once I actually got a good nights rest. I was the first one to wake up at the crack of dawn, just as the sun was starting to rise and as I rolled out of bed, of course- There sat Cas at the table.

"Morning." I said, wary of waking my brothers.

"Good morning." He replied, he was still refusing to look at me but at least he actually spoke.

"You still mad?"

His eyes were squinty, so that told me yes.

"I'm not as _angry _as I was last night if it's any consolation." He answered.

"Hm. I guess I'll take that-" I sat down at the table as well. "So, what does a guy like you do to blow off steam? Sucker-punch a brick wall a few hundred times?"

He didn't look amused, which was how he usually seemed- But knowing that he was actually mad at me hurt. I don't know why, but it did.

"No. Generally I sit and reflect on what has made me angry, trying to deduce a reasonable outcome that won't result in physical violence." He finally looked at me. "The last time I lost my temper Dean bore the brunt of it."

"Ok, well. I can't have you pissed off at me, Cas- In case you haven't noticed it's not like I'm swimming in people I can call friends. So, what can I do to make you _not _angry?"

"Try giving him a lap dance." Dean suddenly said, rolling out of bed. "That should do the trick."

I stared at him with a lopsided expression. "You're disgusting. Do you ever even realize that I'm your sister and not some random bimbo?"

He shrugged, smirking all the way to the bathroom.

"So, seriously, Cas- Why are you so ticked off at me?"

He quickly looked away. "It's become clear to me that not only Sam and Dean believe me to be indifferent when it comes to them risking their lives- Apparently you believe that as well, I suppose that's why I'm angry."

Now I was even more confused. "I don't get it?"

"It means, that I don't want any of you losing your lives."

This wasn't helping, he was speaking in riddles again. "Ok, so you're mad at _me _for risking my life for my brother? But, you're also mad at Sam and Dean for risking _theirs_? And, what about you risking _your _life for us, doesn't that make you a hypocrite?"

Finally for once I seemed to have stumped him, his eyes shifted around the room before he finally just gave up with explaining that and continued to stare out the window.

"But really. I'm sorry if I made you angry. It's not like I planned on running head first into Famine last night. But when Sam was freaking out over the demon blood, I knew I had to do something. Lee was there, he's basically a walking flame-thrower, he had the juice to take that guy out and he wouldn't budge. I had to make him."

"I understand your motives."

"And yet you're still mad?"

"It's difficult to explain."

My eyebrows rose. "Well, care to try?"

He only sat there staring at the table face, luckily being rescued from answering my question when Dean came out of the bathroom.

After nudging Sam a good five times over, he finally woke.

"Hurry up and get ready, princess. I'm starving." He said.

Sam grumbled and let out a loud obnoxious yawn before crawling out of bed and heading to the bathroom.

Castiel had no intention of answering my questions now, and instead occupied himself by making random gibber jabber with Dean. As soon as everyone had their turns in the bathroom we checked out of the motel and drove to the nearest diner.

Even though we usually had no idea what was going to happen most days, I still found it amusing how our lives could actually be so routine. Find a dump motel, sleep, wake up, find a diner and eat breakfast, drive to the next job. Some might find that tedious or redundant, but to me it was practically perfect. One might wonder how someone could think such a lifestyle would be perfect but when it's all you've ever known, a life of normalcy was almost frightening. So yeah, I would take all of the monsters, the demons and freakishly painful beat downs over a normal 9 to 5 job and a house with a white picket fence. Honestly, I didn't think I would know how to function with that kind of life. Something told me that Sam or Dean wouldn't enjoy that much either.

According to Dean, Sam had actually tried it. He went to college, had a nice girl-friend, but was still somehow sucked back into this life. That's the catch in being a Hunter... Once you become one, you can never stop no matter how much you might try.

For the moment everything was semi back to normal. Dean was poking fun at Sam and Cas- Sam was quick with a snippy comeback- Cas was oblivious. For the moment they didn't seem to be pissed at me anymore.

When our food was brought to us, I took a few quick bites before nudging Cas.

"I need to take a trip to the ladies room, skootch it." I said.

He slid out of the booth and let me out, and I moved past the dining area and to the back where the bathrooms waited.

The bathroom wasn't exactly squeaky clean, which was something I tried to ignore. Before locking myself in a stall I took a moment to take a peak at myself in the mirror. It's funny, because I never usually did that. Oh sure, I made sure every morning that my hair wasn't standing on end, but I didn't primp myself to a girlish perfection like most women. Just as long as I didn't look like roadkill I was satisfied. But after looking at myself this time around I let out an annoyed sigh.

Even though my appearance hadn't changed at all- I was still the perfect combination of both my brothers, mixed with a little of my own traits, it seemed as though looking at my reflection became a chore now. I suppose because I would sit and try to pinpoint anything that might have held ties to a Seraphim. Since I didn't know what my Mother looked like, I couldn't really say I resembled her. But, the one thing I did know for sure was that I was no where near as perfect as Lee. Honestly, it was as if he'd been molded and sculpted to the utmost perfection- Like a living marble statue... That was just... Odd. No one should be that beautiful.

Thank god I wasn't anything like that.

I turned away from the mirror and started for the nearest stall- I'm not sure when it happened, or how- But the last thing I remember before blacking out was seeing the womens room completely fill with dark crimson smoke.

* * *

There was a low rumble thumping through my skull, reminding me of the large devils trap shaped air vent in Bobbys panic room. In between moments of being halfway conscious I could see a light flashing above me. The sunlight was being cut by, what I figured it would be, was an air vent- The large blades were twirling slowly but strong enough to create a slight cold breeze.

I halfway expected to realize I was dreaming- But as my eyes finally parted halfway, and I groggily tried to take in my surroundings, a stabbing hot pain in my abdomen forced me to believe this was no _dream_.

Instantly I tried to move, finding myself completely strapped down to a cold metal table. The room I was in was dirty and smelled like mold. The walls were damp, what was once clean white tiles had been sullied by age and years worth of grime.

Where the hell am I, I thought.

My wrists and ankles were securely fastened with leather restraints, and lying beside me on a small metal tray was various medical instruments- Ranging from scalpels to clamps and others that I wasn't familiar with. Off to the opposite side of me was a set of stairs that led to a door, which obviously was completely sealed shut. Not only was it locked, but spray painted in bright red was an angel warding sigil.

"You're awake finally." A voice said from the darkness.

I tried to sit up, but could only manage to lift my head. There was only one man in the room with me, one that I had never seen before. He seemed to be in his middle forties if I had to guess, dressed in solid black. First impressions were that this guy couldn't have been human. That was just common knowledge, because what normal human would actually know how to defend himself against angels? Unless of course, he was a hunter- But even then, hunters never dressed so nicely.

"Who the hell are you?" I asked. No, I wasn't going to snivel and beg for mercy, that just wasn't what I did.

He moved closer to the table with a smirk that I would love to bitch slap away.

"I know this-" He pointed to the table I was strapped to. "Isn't the best way to approach the situation but considering what I've heard about you- I wasn't taking any chances."

His voice was low and gruff, his accent English... In fact, he was eerily similar to Malphas, which wasn't very comforting. Yeah, I had a pretty good suspicion of who this guy was.

"You're Crowley... Aren't you?"

He smiled. "Clever one you are. What gave it away? Was it the rugged good looks?"

"Why am I here?" I ignored his snarky comment.

"I suppose I could lie and say that I wanted to have a little chat- But then, you're probably just as ignorant as your two dunderhead brothers, so..."

"Let me guess." I rolled my eyes. "This has to do with who my Mother was?"

"Hm. Well, yes- In a way. When I first heard about you, naturally I was alarmed- It's bad enough that angels are causing me trouble. But a Seraphim? That's the last thing I need on my plate right now, it's brimming over already." He moved closer and stared down at me. "But I have to say that you're not all that impressive. You're just a squishy little human with no powers what so ever."

"Sorry to disappoint."

"But then I heard-" He paced around the table. "That this image of you right now, was only a ruse, that these fire breathing dragon powers of yours are simply tucked away and hidden- Beneath a spell."

"What's your point? There's no way to undo the spell, so why am I even here?"

He stopped at the head of the table and leaned over in my face. "Lucifer wants you for something. And, since he has to know that you have the capabilities of turning him into angel jerky, then obviously he wouldn't be stupid enough to break that spell." He tapped my cheek with the back of his hand. "So, I started asking myself for what reason would he have to want you- And then it came to me. He must have figured out a way to somehow harness what's been hidden."

"You're a little slow." I smirked. "Because we figured that out a long ass time ago."

I don't think I amused him, so he moved across the room to where a white butchers apron hanged on the wall. After he tied it around himself, he moved to the small metal table.

"Like I was saying-" He continued. "Since I figured that he was going to somehow use you, I started doing a little investigating- And you can't know how surprised I was to discover that this spell can indeed be broken. At least to the point where I could siphon the energies and use them at my disposal. Like my own little living molotov." He slipped on a pair of surgical gloves. "This is the part you might not fancy. It's going to be painful."

Ok, cockiness and a flippant attitude wasn't doing me any justice now. I needed to think of something else.

"Wait a second." I said. "The only thing you're going to succeed in doing is killing me. There's no way of breaking the spell. Not without the incantation, which I destroyed without even bothering to read."

"That's where you're wrong, darling. It can be broken. It breaks, as your body breaks. The only thing I have to do is keep you alive to the point I can use you to my advantage." He picked up a scalpel. "So, let's get started shall we?"


	23. Chapter 23

**_Thanks for all the positive feedback. I honestly didn't think this story would be liked lol._**

* * *

The days afterwards were spent with my screaming until my throat felt raw. Crowley certainly had a vivid imagination as far as tortures went. Thankfully after the first three days I had weakened to the point of going under. During the moments I was unfortunate enough to be awake, it was only long enough to see him grabbing a different sort of utensil to use on me.

He kept his attention focused on my abdominal area, along with my arms and legs- Claiming that he needed to avoid my heart and brain, because obviously if he killed me then he wouldn't be getting what he was looking for.

After poking and prodding and doing everything you could possibly think of to break me, he finally decided to stop with the scalpel and instead try a different approach.

He drained me of blood until I had just enough to ensure I didn't die, but not enough to fully function. It got to the point I couldn't even scream anymore, and breathing was becoming more and more difficult. Whatever it was he was hoping would happen, wasn't happening. The only thing he was doing was killing me.

I eventually lost track of the time, being in and out of coherence, it's hard to determine how many days pass. But, I was thankful to wake up finally and not see Crowley standing over me.

Judging by the sunlight pouring through the dirty windows I figured it was still early in the morning.

I needed to do something before I blacked out again, Sam and Dean wouldn't be able to find me if I was bleeding to death.

This was a long shot... But I had heard Dean say that during times of distress, or when he was really desperate, he would actually pray to Cas for help. Whether he would actually hear me or not, I had no idea- But it was worth a try.

"Cas..." I whispered quietly. "I-I don't know if you can..." My eyes started to blur. "I don't know if you can hear me... But Crowley has me." Now I turned to my second choice. "Lee... Help..."

Blackness returned yet again.

* * *

Dean tossed his duffel bag on top of the table- He stuffed as many weapons, flasks of holy water and salt inside as possible. Sam as well was loading up on the same things, afterwards pulling his knife from his jacket and inspecting it.

"What's taking Cas so long?" Sam asked.

Dean zipped his bag closed and lugged it off the table, slinging it over his shoulder.

"Crowley isn't stupid. Wherever Lara is locked up is probably sealed off with angel sigils- Which means, it's gonna take a while to find her."

Sam sighed, then sat on the end of the bed. "We should have saw this coming."

"We did see it coming- But, we can't exactly follow her every second. Especially if she's in the frickin crapper."

"Dean-" Sam squared his jaw. "What if..."

"Don't, Sammy." Dean raised his finger at him. "Don't finish that sentence. She's still alive, if she wasn't then Cas never would have heard her."

"But that was two days ago, there's no telling what might have happened since then."

"She's a strong girl. And besides... Crowley has no use for her if she's dead."

He had to tell himself that, or else it would mean his sister was gone and it was all his fault. To his mind, he was solely responsible for what happened to both of his younger siblings.

"We should have known better than to think she ran away." Sam interrupted Deans thoughts. "I mean, who would climb out a window in a womens bathroom? We're so stupid."

Everyones first thoughts when they realized Lara was missing was that she had finally decided to run away. And for the first few hours of calling her cell, and driving around looking for her, and then actually activating the GPS on her phone and finding it lying in a ditch- It seemed even more that she had left on her own accord.

"There's no use in thinkin about that now." Dean caught himself staring at Laras belongings that they had brought into the motel with them. "We're gonna find her, Sammy."

Cas had been gone for the last two days, so when he finally returned an hour later the first thing he did was shake his head.

"I can't find her location." He said.

"Dammit!" Dean swatted at the chair beside him. "So what now? How the hell are we supposed to find her?"

"Cas- There has to be some kind of spell, we've used them before." Sam said.

"If Crowley if protected behind sigils than even a spell wouldn't be able to locate him." Cas replied.

"What about _calling_ Crowley? Maybe we can make some kind of deal to get her back."

Dean normally would have objected to such a suggestion, but they didn't have many choices right now.

When there was a knock at the motel door, the first thing they did was pull their guns. Dean stepped quietly to peak out the peep-hole, and once he saw who it was, quickly yanked the door open.

As casual and calm as always Leesander stepped into the room.

"Please tell me you know what the hell is going on?" Dean asked.

"I know where she is." Lee said. "But, I'm unable to get inside. Apparently this King of hell has taken precautions and placed warding sigils that even keeps _me _out."

"Then how did you even find her at all?" Sam walked over and kicked the door closed.

"Who cares about that right now-" Dean grabbed his duffel bag. "Just tell us where she is."

"Tulsa Oklahoma- In an abandoned hospital called Aradale, just outside of town."

"Ok, Cas you wanna zap us there?"

Within seconds they were standing in the treeline just past the abandoned property. Dean immediately starting going through his bag and taking only what he could carry that wouldn't hinder a quick getaway. That meant only one flask of holy water, his pistol and shot gun, and of course Sammys knife.

"Here's the plan." He started. "Since apparently you guys-" He pointed to Cas and Lee-"Can't get inside. Sam and me we'll go in the back. You pick off any stragglers that might be guarding the area."

Cas and Lee exchanged heated glances, it was no big secret that they weren't particularly fond of each other- But for the moment they would have to set that hatred aside.

Dean nudged Sammy and they took off across the dead end street, thankful they at least had the cover of darkness on their side.

* * *

I awoke to the sound of screaming outside, and eventually the building itself had began to shake. I still felt like death warmed over, and could barely hold my head up to see that Crowley was yet again in the room with me.

"Looks as though our time is up, love-" He said, throwing his apron aside. "Seems like Moose and Squirrel have discovered our where abouts." He stopped beside the table I lied on before leaving. "For the record, you should be relieved to hear that it didn't work. No spell broken, you're still a worthless human so maybe you can take some sort of comfort in that? Because if I couldn't break you, then Lucifer won't be able to either."

I hadn't the strength to curse at him, but I'm sure my eyes said enough. He was unfazed however and gave me that horrible smirk before disappearing.

What a coward. He brings me here and uses me as a human punching bag and then just runs away.

With what little strength I had, which wasn't enough to push a chair, I tried to pry my hands and ankles free. But the only thing I succeeded in doing was taring open my wounds that had started to scab over. I didn't exactly want to lie there like a helpless kitten, but unfortunately my getting out of there relied solely on Sam and Dean blasting their way inside. Considering the angel proofing on the door, Cas wouldn't be getting in. Which meant my brothers were on their own. I could only hope that Crowleys henchmen had fled when he had.

By the time the door was kicked open and I heard footsteps running towards me, I couldn't hold my eyes open any longer.

"Lara- Hey, hey, kiddo- Wake up." I heard Sam say, as he lightly tapped my cheek. "Comon, wake up. We're gonna get you outa here."

"Is she alive?!" I heard Dean shout before a gunshot, followed by a scream from a demon.

"Yeah, she's alive. But not good." Sam started tugging at the leather restraints on my wrists and ankles. "Sorry, Lara- But this is probably gonna hurt."

I felt him tuck his arms under my neck and legs as he gently scooped me up. Somehow I managed to let out a small cry from the pain.

"Just hold on." I heard Dean say. "Let's go."

I was semi aware of what was happening around me as they ran through the near pitch black halls. We stopped only a few times as left over demons ran at them- But Dean wielded the magic knife, and they were quickly cut down. When I felt the warm night air on my face, and the patches of stars in the sky became visible I let out a sigh of relief.

It felt like we ran for miles before finally stopping. Sam lied me down on the cool grass as more footsteps approached.

Dean started inspecting me, and whatever was left of me from Crowley.

"We need to get her to a hospital." I heard Sam say.

"Lee, dude- You're not an angel _angel_, can't you heal her?" Dean shifted beside me.

"Excuse me?" Lee replied.

"You heard me. This spell that's on her only affects angels. Technically you're not a regular angel. Get to healing." There was nothing but silence as a response. "Cas, it would work right?"

"Dean we don't have time to argue over this." Sam protested. "Let's just get her to a hospital."

"It would work." Cas finally said. "Unless Sauriel had even protected her against her own kind."

"Try it." Dean snapped his fingers. "Comon, Lee- Hurry it up."

"I can't. It goes against my orders."

"Screw your orders, man. She's hurt and you're supposed to protect her. Do something about it!"

"Dean!" Sam stood and I just barely saw him jerk him by the arm. "Hospital... Now!"

Cas took matters into his own hands as he reached down and carefully picked me up. I felt a gust of wind and heard a flutter of wings before the scenery around me changed. The dark of night was replaced by the bright lights of the hospitals ER. Apparently Cas didn't even bother to enter the front doors, he took me straight to a room swarming with nurses.

"I need assistance." I heard him say.

Within seconds I was lied on a table and I just barely caught a glimpse of Cas being shoved out of the room.


	24. Chapter 24

"Can you give us the description once more?" The police officer asked. "Just for the record."

"Yeah, uh. He was about six feet, brown hair and eyes. Light complected with a beard." Dean said. "And he was driving a beat up chevy truck."

"And you claim your sister didn't know this man?"

Sam shook his head. "No. She was walking home from the grocery store and he jumped her. Tried to steal her purse."

The cop didn't look convinced, but considering several of Laras wounds were at least a week old, it wasn't surprising.

"We're going to need you to answer some more questions for us. So don't leave town."

Both brother watched the two officers descend the hallway.

"That went well." Dean said sarcastically.

"Yeah. I'm betting we have a couple hours before they come put us in cuffs." Sam turned back for the room door.

Inside Lara was still unconscious, and more then likely would be for hours. Whatever medication they had given her had knocked her out completely. Thankfully, according to the Doctor in charge, none of her wounds were life threatening- He stated that whomever did the work on her had some kind of knowledge since he hadn't hit any arteries or caused internal bleeding. But, the blood-loss was still significant enough to warrant a transfusion. That combined with being severely dehydrated had weakened her to the point she wouldn't be discharged for several days.

"How's she doing?" Dean asked Cas, who had been standing guard since the moment they were allowed in her room.

"According to the nurse, she's doing well." He answered.

"No thanks to that asshole." Dean motioned towards Lee in the corner. "Ya know. I don't get you. You said you were here to watch out for her, seeing is that she's the last of your kind and all. So, why didn't you help her?"

"I told you-" Lee rolled his eyes. "I had specific orders, and healing injuries were not included."

"Then what's the point of you even being here at all?" Sam asked now. "If you're here to protect her, doesn't that mean you can help if she's hurt?"

"It's far more complicated than that."

"Ok, well- We got all damn day. Try explaining." Dean crossed his arms and widened his eyes.

Lee pushed away from the wall he leaned against. "My orders were to ensure that Lara is not taken by Lucifer, I'm not here to coddle her or hold her hand."

"Wow. You're a real heartless bastard, _and _a coward." Dean sat down in the chair beside the bed. "I can see now how your species became extinct. Frickin pussies won't do anything for themselves."

"It's called being an obedient soldier." Lees eyes had darkened at Deans last comment.

"There is a difference between _loyalty_, and doing what is right." Cas suddenly said.

"_You're _going to lecture me? You completely rebelled against your own kind and branded yourself an outlaw."

"Perhaps so- But according to your own words _God _hasn't yet disowned me."

Yet again they started in with their death stares, Sam stepped in between them before they would start throwing punches.

"Look-" He said. "I get that you want to obey your Father, I know what that's like. But, there comes a time when you have to start thinking for yourself. Obviously you aren't as heartless as Dean thinks, because if you were- Then you never would have stopped by our motel room, or helped Cas in taking out those demons."

"Your comments hold no relevance." Lee moved back to his previous position.

"Yeah- They do." Sam gave a slight smile.

"What my sappy brother is saying is that you have a friggin choice to make, man." Dean bellowed. "Either you can stick around and help out, or get your ass outa here, because we got enough problems on our hands right now and don't need to deal with you. Look around you- God ain't here, he's hiding and letting us do all the dirty work. Since that's the case, it's not exactly fair for you to sit back on your ass and do nothing while the people who are risking their lives to save this planet are getting gutted."

Lee shook his head and yet again pushed away from the wall. He took a few long strides across the room until stopping beside Laras bed and lying his hand on her chest. A slight glow illuminated from his palm, which lasted a good three seconds before he pulled away.

"When she wakes her injuries will be healed. I did what I could do, but she'll still be weak from the blood-loss." Now he started for the door. "I'm taking my leave. And I've made my choice. I will no longer assist you- Unlike others" He glared at Cas. "I do not rebel for humanity, or for anyone else."

He left the room and closed the door behind him, leaving Sam and Dean to pass each other lopsided stares.

"Wow. What a dick." Dean said.

"Yeah... But at least he did something right before ditching us." Sam sat in the windowsill.

"Whatdya think, Cas?" Dean kicked his feet up on Laras bed.

"I think that he is a pompous ass- And there is something that he's not telling us."

Deans brows arched as he looked at Sam with half a smile. Cas didn't curse often, or at all actually. It just didn't sound right coming from the angels lips.

"Uh- Do you have any idea what that might be?" Sam tried not to laugh.

"Only that it has to do with his orders. There's more to it than what he let on. Personally- I'm glad that he's gone."

"Well anyways-" Dean nudged Lara with his foot playfully. "Hurry up, sister. We gotta get outa here before the cops come back."

* * *

When I woke up I was relieved to find that I was no longer writhing in pain, and despite a little drowsiness felt pretty damn good considering what happened. It was only after Dean told me that Lee had stepped up and healed me that I understood just how I hadn't died. But, according to my brothers- Shortly after healing me, Lee took off... I wasn't exactly upset over that fact, it seemed that he would only cause more harm than good so I wouldn't shed any tears. Although, his demon smiting powers would be sorely missed.

I didn't have the chance to laze around in bed though, because a few minutes after waking I was up and dressing myself and getting ready to leave. After explaining to everyone why Crowley had wanted me, and obviously what he wanted to happen _didn't_, both Dean and Sam swore up and down that the next chance they got- Crowley would be roasting over a spit with an apple in his fat mouth.

After glancing around the curtain that separated my bed from the rest of the room and noticing Dean hitting on my nurse- I rolled my eyes- What a way to distract her from noticing I wasn't lying half dead in bed any longer.

"So, Brittany-" Dean smiled. "I have your number, what do you say we get together for a drink sometime?"

My twenty something nurse only giggled before waving slightly and leaving the room- He watched her go with a big goofy grin before the door closed.

I pushed the curtain open now and shook my head. "Dude, do you have to hit on my nurse?"

"What?" Dean faked ignorance. "She's hot."

Sam chuckled and rolled his eyes. "So how're you feeling?"

"Well, like I've just tried to climb mount Everest. But other than that, ok."

Dean hopped a spry little jump towards the door. "I'm gonna go swing the car around the back. Be there in ten minutes."

"Stay away from the nurses!" I shouted after him.

He just waved from over his shoulder before closing the door behind him.

"Do you need anything else before we go?" Sam asked. "We didn't know what clothes to bring."

Apparently not, seeing is that they gave me long sleeved sweater which was more fitting for winter. But I wasn't going to complain.

"I think I'm good. A little hungry but I'm sure we can swing by somewhere before leaving town..." I paused. "Uh, just where are we anyways? What state?"

"Oklahoma." Castiel answered, he had been silent since I woke up.

"I'll run down to the vending machine and get you a bag of Doritos or something to hold you over." Sam smiled. "Be back in a sec."

After he was gone I sat on the edge of my bed and pulled my boots on. I could sense a strange sort of tension in the room, and obviously it wasn't coming from myself. Nope, Cas- There was something up with him... Again. Now, this wasn't my fault this time. I didn't run off, I didn't find Crowley, he found _me_. So if he was pissed at me again...

"Lara. I want to apologize." He suddenly said.

I stopped lacing my boots and looked at him with an arched brow. "What? Why?"

His eyes fell to the floor. "With what I am- Something as simple as healing someone shouldn't become such an issue. And, the morning you disappeared, I treated you poorly."

So wait... He was apologizing for... What exactly? Why did he always manage to confuse the crap out of me?

"Um, considering the stupid thing I did the night before Crowley took me- I wouldn't have expected you to dance around in happiness. And as far as this healing nonsense- Well, that's not your fault. It's my Mothers for placing that spell on me, so- Blame her."

"Still I feel regret."

"Well you don't have to. You didn't do anything." After half way lacing my second boot, I paused yet again. "You know. You confuse the crap out of me sometimes."

"Why?"

"I don't know. I suppose because I can't read you. Sam and Dean are simple- Sam flaunts his puppy dog face, Dean cusses and stomps around. It's easy to know what they might be thinking or feeling. You... I have no frickin idea most of the time."

"And you consider this to be negative?"

I shrugged. "No, not necessarily- But, sometimes I get the feeling that you might not be too thrilled with having me around. Which, if that's true I can understand- It won't hurt my feelings. I mean, I pretty much just barged in without even asking."

When I didn't hear a response I stopped with my boots entirely and returned my attention to him. He was still standing in the same position, his arms were crossed and he was leaning against the wall- But his head was tilted, his brows scrunched and he was staring vacantly across the room like I had just lapsed into Swedish.

I whistled to break him of his trance. "Yo, Cas. Wakey wakey."

His body was still stiff but he did shift his eyes to mine. "You asked me once why it was I jumped in front of you during the fight with Raphael and Zachariah?"

Ok, random... "Uhh... Yeah? That was a long ass time ago, dude."

"You asked me if I had ever considered how much worse the situation might have ended up had I been killed, correct?" I nodded, where was he going with this? "The answer to that question would be that in my thoughts, you're dying would have been considerably worse. My first thoughts were not how Sam or Dean would feel if you died, but how I would feel."

"Huh?" Seriously, what the heck was he getting at?

As luck would have it, or bad luck- I don't know how to properly define it- Sam returned to the room carrying a small bag of potato chips and a can of coke in the other.

"Ready? Deans got the car waiting in the back?" He asked- But then froze once he noticed the strange interactions between Cas and I. "Uh, guys? You ok?"

"We're fine." Cas answered, unfolding his arms and walking out of the room.

I stood and grabbed my bag, still just as puzzled as before.

"Lara?" Sam chuckled nervously. "What's up?"

"I honestly have no flippin idea, dude."

After picking up my jacket, I followed Sam from my room and to the side elevators down the hall. Cas had obviously poofed himself to the car, or to oblivion, I didn't know- And during the ride from the fourth floor to the first, Sam kept giving me confused stares.

"You look-" He said, concerned. "You look like you've just seen a ghost, ironically enough- You sure you're feelin ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired." Before the elevator reached the ground floor I turned to him. "Has Cas ever said anything to you? In particular, about me?"

He shrugged as his brows rose. "Not that I know of. I'm not usually the one he confides in the most ya know. If there's ever something on Cas' mind he generally talks to Dean."

"Well there goes that idea. I'd sooner pull answers out of my own ass before Dean would ever tell me anything."

"What's this about, Lara?"

"Like I said, I have no flippin idea."

He wasn't satisfied with that response, but didn't question it thankfully- Because I really didn't have a way to explain it. Yeah, I had nothing.

After leaving the elevator and escaping out a back exit and finding Dean waiting in the car- We climbed in and took off.

* * *

It's funny how months can go by and feel like mere seconds. Summer was gone, and November seemed to be flitting away with the breeze and yet things remained the same. We hunted, we drove, we playfully squabbled to pass the time- And it was as good as things could be I suppose. But it had been since August that we came into possession of a horsemans ring, which was making my brothers on edge. We had two rings left. Death and Wars... And we had no idea how to find them. We got lucky with the first two, since Crowley had given Sam and Dean Pestilences location, and with some strange deaths happening in Kentucky, we were led to Famines. But the remaining two... Were completely hidden.

Actually, despite a few little jobs which consisted of werewolves, witches and ghouls, oh my- Things were pretty calm. A little too calm considering Lucifer was running amuck across the globe and we were supposed to be in the thralls of the apocalypse. Something was up, we knew that much- It's always calm before the bloody and gruesome storm, so we were just waiting for something massive to go down. Maybe a city being completely leveled, more strange deaths, biblical earthquakes or floods, but yeah... Nada, ziltch. Things were so vanilla for once we didn't know what the heck to do. Jobs started becoming less and less frequent. Even something tiny and small like a vengeful spirit was becoming a rarity.

During the times with nothing to do we camped at Bobbys, just like always. Either that or Dean would just want to drive with no real destination and hope that we came across something. I think he was going through some kind of monster withdrawal- Dean just didn't know how to function without some kind of job to occupy his time.

November as well came and passed and it had been, count it, one entire month without a job. Yeah it was nice to get a break every now and then, but comon. What the hell was going on? I felt like banging my head against the wall from boredom, hoping to knock myself out and spare myself the agony of living through another day with nothing to do.

"Your bet." Dean said, nudging me with his foot from under the table.

I snapped out of it long enough to realize that we were still playing poker, and Dean was mopping the floor with me. Cas was attempting to learn the game as well, and was having subtle difficulties in grasping that you weren't supposed to ask for which card you needed. His last was of course, asking politely for an ace of spades for his royal flush.

I stared down at my pathetic two pairs, fours and sixes, before bidding fifty cents.

"Fifty cents?" Dean leaned forward and glared at me. "That's the best you can do?"

"I don't exactly have a million bucks to throw down on the table, just take it or leave it."

"Fine-" He sat back, examining his own hand before tossing a twenty on the table. "Raise."

"I hate you." I grabbed another twenty and tossed it on the pile with the rest. "Call."

He lied down his hand with a sneer, revealing a full house- Which of course resulted in me throwing my cards at him and cursing.

"I swear to god you're cheating you, ass-wipe."

He gave me a "Haha" before scooting the small pile of bills and pocket change towards him.

"Keep em comin, baby. I can do this all night." He taunted.

Cas had nominated himself as the dealer and set up another hand. After five minutes and finally having something that wasn't complete crap- I tried to put on my best bluff face. It wasn't every day that I got four Aces, and I did not want to lose more money to my idiot brother. Poor Cas had lost all but three bucks, but didn't seem to care unless of course, Dean started making fun of him.

I started off bidding small, faking being pissed when Dean would raise- And after the pot had went from a measly ten bucks to eighty five, Dean was getting antsy.

Cas had folded a long ass time ago and sat and examined the dirty looks Dean and I gave each other. He then leaned forward and said.

"One of the two of you is clearly bluffing."

"Dude." Dean said. "No reading us, man- That's like cheating. Stop trying to help her, let her lose her money fair and square."

I chuckled. "You're bound to lose sometime- And you're the one that's cheating."

"Prove it." He pursed his lips at me. "I call you."

My face was completely blank as I lied my hand down on the table, afterwards sitting back with my arms crossed and waiting to see what Dean had. He stared at the cards for a good ten seconds before sitting back and shaking his head.

"Friggin cheater, take it." He said.

It was hard not to let out a slight cheer at finally beating him. And I quickly pocketed the cash and change while he continued to pout.

"You're a damn card shark. Fake sucking ass and then wait til the last second to take all my cash."

"Whatever you big baby. You couldn't have a hot streak all night."

Sam stepped into the kitchen. "You guys done?"

Dean stood from the table and stomped to the fridge, grabbing himself a beer. "Oh yeah, we're done. Our sister is a frickin cheater."

"Quit being a girl-" Sam laughed. "So, you wanna come check out what I found?"

"Oh please let it be something." I said, following Sam into the den.

"Well, don't get your hopes up just yet." Sam grabbed one of Bobbys books. "According to what's written here- Now, take into consideration this book is centuries old," He paused and we only nodded. "It says that when it comes to the horsemen Death and War, they kind of coincide. Partners in crime so to speak."

"Meaning?" Dean asked.

"Meaning, that War causes the destruction, and Death reaps the souls _caused_ from the destruction." He pointed to a section in the book, which was old and faded. "It says that the first signs that War is going to town is that there will be a momentary lapse of peace, then literally all hell breaks loose. We're talkin massive floods, bombings, nuclear meltdowns- Entire cities being completely leveled by earthquakes. Every catastrophic event possible exploding all at once."

After hearing that I snatched Deans beer away and gulped down more than half.

"Great, so... What the hell are we supposed to do? Just sit around and wait for the world to get nuked?" Dean asked.

"Well, maybe not." Sam shrugged. "Like I said, this book is beyond old, so things have obviously changed worldwide since it was written. But, according to this- It says that the only real way of finding War is that the signs would pinpoint an area where it's been unusually fruitful."

"Fruitful?" I sat up. "So, meaning maybe, people are having a string of really good luck?"

"Maybe, it's hard to tell from reading this. But, where ever things are fruitful is where the first real tragedy will strike. War has an unusual sense of humor I guess."

I lied on the sofa and rubbed my head. "This is gonna take forever. He could be anywhere in the world. This is gonna be impossible."

"Yeah cause what are the chances he'll be within driving distance like the first two." Dean agreed.

"In answer to that-" Cas said. "The horsemen are under Lucifers command, which means they wouldn't stray far from him. Since Lucifer was risen in his country, the chances aren't likely that the horsemen would be anywhere else but here."

Dean perked up, but only slightly. "Ok, great- Now all we need to do is search for a town or city that's had a string of good luck, or... Whatever the hell being _fruitful _means."

Sam had already opened his laptop. "I'll get on it."

"Wheres my i-pad." I said now, jumping up to go through my bag.

"What the hell am I supposed to do?" Dean scowled. "With you hogging all the electronics and crap."

"Just sit there and look pretty." I smirked, but then tossed him my phone. "Use that, ya know- You need to upgrade your piece of crap cell from that lame ass flip-phone."

He didn't look pleased with that comment, but started doing his own research as he spread out on the couch and kicked his feet on my lap. I ignored it, since I was already skimming through newspaper articles or any sort of news broadcast on YouTube that could possibly give us clues. Bobby returned an hour later with take-out, so we ate while still searching. After an hour passed and still nothing, Dean was getting restless. He had discovered the magic that was an MP3 player on my phone and struggled to adjust the headphones.

"Dean-" Sam snickered. "You don't try shoving something inside just because there's a hole there."

"That's what she said." Dean and I said in unison.

Sam shook his head, returning his attention to his laptop. "You two scare me sometimes."

We kept looking until it was 3am, and after finding nothing still I stood and lied my i-pad aside.

"Want anything from the kitchen?"

Dean was already snoring on the couch with music blasting through his ear-buds, and Sam didn't look far from dozing off.

"If there's any cold coffee, I'll take that." Sam answered.

This was exhausting. It would have been a little different had we actually had something definite to look for. This book Sam was reading was practically older than God, and could have possibly been written by some religious fanatic that didn't know Lucifer from Michael. And seeing is that the horsemen hadn't been released in... I dunno, thousands of years? The rules might have changed since then.

There was just enough coffee left in the pot for Sam, I dosed it up with a heaping helping of sugar and mixed it with some ice. It should give him enough of a jolt to keep reading. Myself however had to settle for a coke. As I exited the kitchen I nudged Dean and he snorted awake.

"Still nothing?" I asked.

"I thought I had something a second ago, but it was a bust." Sam yawned loudly, and nodded thanks for his coffee.

He chugged a few gulps and he shuddered from how strong it was.

Dean was coherent enough to sit up and stare half cross eyed at my phone screen and I went back to my i-pad. Cas had left a couple hours prior and returned with no information. Just when I figured this entire thing was completely useless Bobby came downstairs.

"I think I got somethin." He said.

Sam peaked up from his laptop. "Uh, you do? How?"

"I have computer in my room ya idgit. You think you're the only one that knows how to research?"

Sam frowned and Bobby pulled out some papers he had printed up.

"So, I know it ain't much, but it's all I got so far. Colquitt Georgia is claimin a miracle has _blessed _their town. They've been in a drought for, I don't even know how long- Which is killin crops and livestock, but out of nowhere suddenly crops start growin, even with no rain. Small town, not much media coverage on a place with less than two thousand people. If ya ask me, War ain't gonna stash himself in a big enough city that would draw attention."

"Yeah, especially since he knows we've iced two of his brothers." Dean commented, then shrugged. "Well, it's a start at least. Cause we haven't found jack squat."

Sam immediately started typing. "I'll check it out a little more."

"I'll inspect the town." Cas said, then poofed away.

"Ok, so-" Sam started. "Bobby might be on to something. Before the miracle crops, there were a few incidents that happened in town that seemed to just give further confirmation that "God" was on their side. Long story short, a man was working on his truck, the jack broke and completely crushed him, but somehow he survived- Even though he was trapped for four hours and couldn't breathe. And a twelve year old girl got hit by a car, flew fifteen feet into a ditch, and got up and walked away without a scratch."

"Seems kinda strange doesn't it?" I said. "That a horseman, and War of all people, could actually make good things happen."

"Yeah," Sam went on. "But according to what I read in the book, that's just the beginning. Before long that towns citizens will start turning on each other. It'll become a battle-field. And after that town has been wiped out, he'll move on to bigger and more destructive methods."

"Such as the floods and nuclear meltdowns." Dean added.

Bobby tossed his papers aside. "We gotta get this guy before all that happens. We're talkin the country being completely wiped off the map here."

"He instills paranoia-" Sam said, reading from the book now. "Which then causes people to turn on each other, hence how he acquired the title of War. Even things that seem like natural disasters will set people off."

I sighed tossed my i-pad on the sofa. "So, this means that there's a possibility that even _we_ could turn on each other?"

Everyone took a moment to exchange looks before Dean said. "That won't happen. We've handled the other horsemen pretty damn good I'd say."

"Except for Pestilence. But, I wasn't there to help..."

"Well, whatever. But we'll be fine."

He didn't believe that, his eyes gave away his true feelings. Mainly because with Famine Sam had a freak out and almost fell off the wagon as far as the demon blood goes. Sure, Dean and I were ok, but that didn't mean it would remain that way with the other horsemen.

Castiel poofed back a few minutes later and shook his head. "There are bodies lying in the street. The war's started."

"Crap." Dean jumped to his feet, as did the rest of us. "We gotta get our stuff packed now before we lose him."

I grabbed my jacket and ran outside to where my car was parked in Bobbys garage. We were going to need more than just a pistol this time, what with an entire town battling each other.

As soon as the cold winter air slammed against my chest I lost my breath, and I crunched through snow banks and pried the doors on the garage open. My poor baby was still in pieces, since Cas hadn't put her back together yet. Dean still seemed to think that me not having my own car would prevent me from running away, even though it had been six months that I'd been with them. No, I wasn't gonna run away anymore, it hadn't even crossed my mind in over a month.

I popped open my trunk and started pulling out weapons. With my shotgun I replaced the salt rounds with actual shells, and rummaged through the rest of my items until finding a decent sized knife, no silver, just a regular old hunters knife, and for good measure another handgun that was smaller and would fit in my jacket pocket. When Cas appeared beside me I didn't bother questioning him and started handing him things from the trunk.

"Dean will want to go to the extremes with this one." I said. "Since we're probably going to be fighting an entire town."

"I don't require weapons." He said, confused.

"I know, but I'm stocking up. We can't exactly go Smitey McSmiterson on everyone like you can." After I slammed the trunk closed I let out a sigh, watching a cloud of my own breath dissipate in the cold air. "Do you think there will be demons there this time too?"

"I hadn't sensed their presences, it seemed only that the citizens had started slaughtering each other."

"Maybe that'll make things easier, huh?" No, it wouldn't but it was a nice thought. "This is gonna be bad... I know that much. So, if things turn really shitty would you do something for me? For instance, if I turned bat shit insane?"

"Possibly."

I rolled my eyes. "If for some reason I'm the one affected by War and I become too dangerous to handle- Just go after the ring and leave me behind. Help Sam and Dean and then get the hell outa that town."

"You know I won't accept such a request."

"Ugh, no you wouldn't would you. But ya know what? I guarantee Dean is gonna say the very same thing, even Sam."

He didn't deny that, which led me to believe they had already said it, which in turn made me wonder how he responded to them. I highly doubted that he would have accepted it from them either. Cas was so gung-ho on keeping our asses alive that he never really considered what might happen to himself. But then he would lecture me for wanting to put myself in danger for them. Like I've said a million times already, he confused the crap outa me.

Especially after that weird convo we had in the hospital a couple months back, still I hadn't figured out what the heck he meant by it. And he didn't bother to explain it afterwards. I dunno, maybe he expected me to just magically understand like I was a mystical wizard capable of reading ones thoughts. Honestly after that conversation I wasn't sure what to make of him. Beforehand he was Cas the helpful angel, Dean and Sams best bud, I considered him a friend too but really didn't think he considered _me _a friend. But apparently he didn't hate me as much as I thought. It was just incredibly frustrating not being able to read the dude. I mean, really- How does one read a person who 99 times out of 100 never has any facial expressions, and speaks with no enthusiasm? It's hard to determine whether or not someone might be pissed, happy or hate you with a burning passion.

I crammed the weapons from my trunk in a duffel bag and zipped it closed. Afterwards I stood and took at look at my car.

"Dude. Please, I'm begging you. Put my baby back together again." I said.

"Dean said..."

"I _know _what Dean said. But I promise I'm not going to take off. And if the last six months have told you _anything _you should know by now that I'm not a liar." I tried giving a sweet smile. "I swear."

He immediately looked away and I silently cheered, maybe I had finally found his weak spot? Maybe I successfully preformed the perfect puppy dog face like Sam always did?

"When we return from this mission I'll repair it." He said.

I grinned and slung my duffel bag over my shoulder. "Thank you."

He followed me from the garage and back inside where Dean and Sam waited. We discussed what was going to happen for only a short ten minutes before Cas zapped us all to Georgia.


	25. Chapter 25

First thoughts when looking at what should have been a small quiet town was that it looked as though bombs had gone off. We were in the middle of what I assumed was the main street where businesses and old buildings sat- All of which were either smoldering, or had been completely vandalized and ransacked. Litter and charred garbage covered the road, along with a few scattered bodies who looked to have been torn apart. All but one of the of the street lights had been busted, and the one that remained was flickering on and off.

"Where the hell is everyone?" Dean spoke first.

"It's too quiet." I said now. "If this is a war zone where's all the screaming and gunfire?"

No one had answers for that, so we started walking. The majority of the buildings had been looted, and what wasn't worth taking was now lying in the street. There were shredded mattresses, refrigerators with the doors ripped off, tires and piles of garbage. We were looking at the exact replica of every apocalyptic zombie movie ever made minus the flesh eating freaks.

Dean led the way as we started searching the ravaged buildings, coming across nothing but the remnants of what used to be a bakery, a library and liquor store. No crazed physcos so far, and it was looking more and more like this town had been completely demolished. Had there been survivors, something told me that they were killed ages ago.

"Maybe we should separate." Sam suggested. "Cover more ground that way."

"Too risky." Dean replied. "We need to stick together."

"We'll be more likely to find this guy if we separate, Dean. We got our cells on us, if something goes wrong we can call you."

Dean let out an aggravated sigh, then reluctantly nodded. "Alright, Lara, stick with Sam. Don't take your eyes off of each other for a second, got it?"

"Got it." I readied my gun, passed Cas a glance and nod before following Sam out of the building.

We went in the opposite direction we came, eventually finding ourselves in a residential area with older houses and destroyed vehicles. The windshields and windows on every one had been smashed, some were missing tires and doors. And as we passed a particular SUV, spray painted on the hood were the words. "TRUST NO ONE".

"Well that can't be good." Sam said, then motioned towards one of the houses. "Let's check out this area."

As quietly as possible we crossed the street and ran to the side of a two story house. The space in between each buildings were narrow, barely five feet wide. Combine that with all of the debris and garbage it was difficult to step without making any sound. We took peaks in the smashed windows seeing the homes had been just as ransacked as everything else. It looked as though a pack of wild dogs went to town on the furniture and belongings, everything was practically unidentifiable.

Sam paused at the end of the narrow alley, and let out a sigh. "No one. Seriously, how is everyone gone?"

After asking that question we heard a snap at the opposite end of the alley. We both turned in unison and noticed three figures looming in the darkness. Each of them carried some sort of makeshift weapon, one seemed to be a leg from a table, the other a golf club, the third a butchers cleaver.

"Shit." I said, and felt Sam tug me by the jacket as we started running.

Pulling our weapons and opening fire would only draw attention from any other crazies that might have been in the area. We would either have to outrun them or find a more silent way of taking them out.

They gave chase as we rounded the side of another house and back into the quiet street. I was running as fast as I could, but Sam had longer legs and strides so it was hard to keep up with him. He ended up grabbing my wrist and pulling me along with him as we left that street behind and entered another where more houses waited. We darted behind yet another house and pressed against the wall. Sam shushed me and peaked around the corner, huffing and panting out of breath.

"I think we lost em." He whispered.

I blew out a relieved breath of air. This entire thing wouldn't have been so frightening if weren't just he and I- And we weren't in almost complete darkness. If it weren't for the moon, then we would have been screwed.

When we heard another snap and suddenly a man appeared beside a tall tree- We both immediately rose our guns.

"Whoa, whoa. Don't shoot, please." He begged. "I'm not one of them... I swear."

Sam stood in front of me and motioned with his gun for the man to move closer, which he did slowly.

"I'm unarmed." He continued, opening his suit jacket as proof. "Those lunatics have been chasing me all damned night. What the hell is going on?"

"Who are you?" Sam asked.

The man lowered his hands and removed his glasses, rubbing a trace of sweat from his brow.

"My name is Robert Clark, I'm a lawyer in Atlanta. I was just here visiting my wives parents when suddenly everything went to hell." He paused. "Who are you?"

Sam glanced at me from over his shoulder and finally stepped aside. The dude was clearly unarmed and if he made a sudden move he would have a bullet in his head before he could even blink.

"We're here to help." Sam answered. "We heard about what was happening- Do you know when everyone started going crazy?"

The man raised both hands in the prayer position, resting them under his chin as he shook. The only thing I could look at was a plain gold wedding band on his left hand.

"Uhh.. Yesterday morning, it started with my in-laws neighbors- They thought we had stolen the tomatoes out of their garden- They came over with shotguns and blew everyone away." He choked back a sob. "Over tomatoes? Who the hell does that?"

"Something's happening here." Sam tried to sound comforting. "That's why we're here to help."

The man nodded slightly, then started to twist the ring on his finger. "Those men you came into town with. They're trying to kill you, you know that right?"

I instantly wanted to respond with how insane that was, but my thoughts were suddenly blown away with a gust of wind.

"What?" Sams demeanour changed, fear etched across his face, along with anger.

"What do you mean they're trying to kill us?" My heart started pounding. "We don't even know those men."

"They're with _them_." The man motioned towards the street where we had lost the chasers. "They're crazy, and if you don't defend yourself- They _will _kill you."

Suddenly every rational thought was completely replaced with fear and anger. The survival instinct kicked in, and Sam and I looked at each other in confusion. As of right then and there, Sam was the only person I could trust- Everyone else was fair game. Those two men we came into town with? I couldn't even remember their names, but knew their faces- I remembered seeing a gun in the pretty ones hand, along with a knife in his jacket. The other, the blank faced guy in the trench-coat seemed shady as well... Not to mention dangerous.

Sam and I immediately checked every weapon we carried, ensuring our guns were fully loaded, our knives sharp. We were going to have to battle those men, including the crazies in this town. We were the only ones that knew what the hell was happening. For some reason we were placed right in the middle of a war zone and the only way to get out alive was to start killing.

We both struggled to remember how we ended up in this situation, why we were in this town- But for the moment those memories were completely lost.

"We need to find a place to hide." Sam said with a nod. "Those bastards are out there, they're probably hunting us."

"I know." My hands were clearly shaking. "But what are we supposed to do? We can't hide forever."

Sam led the way from behind the house, and we started wandering in no particular direction. We didn't know this town at all, everything was completely foreign and confusing. We ducked behind a burnt out car as Sam tried to gather his bearings.

"Ok, here's what we'll do." He started. "If we have any chance of getting outa here alive, we have to hunt them down before they can do the same to us."

I nodded, agreeing wholeheartedly. "Who are they, Sam? Why were we with them?"

"I don't know-" Sams breathing was erratic, his eyes all over the place. "They must have tricked us somehow. They were probably going to kill us before we escaped."

"But why? We didn't do anything to them."

"They're crazy." Sam motioned to the gun I held. "You, uh. Do you know how to use that thing?"

"I guess." With a quick few clicks and swipes the magazine fell out, and I quickly shoved it back in. "Yeah, seems so. Huh... I wonder where I learned that."

He shrugged and did the same with his gun, then started going through his jacket pockets, pulling out a cell.

"I have missed texts." He stated. "From someone named... Dean."

"Who the hell is Dean?"

"Beats me." He opened up the texts and started reading, his face going blank. "Look at what he said?"

He held the phone in front of my face and my heart skipped a beat.

_Where the hell are you guys? I swear if you don't friggin respond I'm gonna kick your asses!_

"Oh my god. That must be one of them. He's threatening us." I immediately pulled out my phone. "I have missed texts too. One from a Cas, and another from Dean."

_Dean is becoming insistent that you comply. He's losing his temper. _Was from this person called Cas.

_You two better be friggin alive or I'm gonna kill you! _Was from Dean.

I quickly showed them to Sam and his eyes widened. "These guys are psychopaths. This must be some kind of fear tactic."

"Yeah... They're trying to spook us so we'll surrender or some crap... What now?"

"First things first." He took a deep breath. "We need to calm down. I know we're not killers, Lara- But we need to put that mindset aside and focus on surviving. These guys are crazy, they won't listen to reason. They'll just start shooting or hacking at us." His eyes became serious now. "We can't let that happen. It's just you and me here, kiddo. We gotta watch each others backs."

Something was terribly wrong here and I just couldn't figure out what. First we end up in this town with no recollection of _how _we ended up there, and what's worse is that this entire town was full of insane murderers. How were Sam and I the only lucid people here?

"Let's go." He tugged on my wrist and we left the sanctuary of the burned out car.

His grip was tight on my wrist, almost as if he was afraid I'd be snatched away if he let go. I didn't mind. I was scared shitless and my big brother was the only one that could watch out for me. Ok... That much I did know. Sam was my older brother, our last name was Winchester. But, for the moment that's as far as both our memories went.

"They must have drugged us or something." I felt myself say. "Which is why we can't remember anything."

"Yeah... I know." Sam brushed his hair from his eyes. "Maybe we gave them a ride or something, and they jumped us."

"Maybe..."

We started through the tattered remains of a park, the swings were creaking in the breeze as newspapers and smoke fluttered through the air. What was left of a bonfire was still slightly smoldering in the center beside a large fountain. As we passed Sam suddenly tugged me close and put his hand over my eyes.

"Don't look." He said. "You don't want to see what's on that fire."

I shuddered slightly but pushed his hand away. "I'm ok, Sammy."

Maybe not, because once I saw the charred remains of nearly a dozen bodies completely blackened, I almost vomited. The smell was horrendous and the deep gray smoke billowed up almost like a morbid signal to whoever passed. It was a way of saying "Stay out, you don't belong here".

We were passing the monkey bars and slides when someone called out.

"Hey!"

Both of us swung around and my heart lurched to my throat.

"Oh shit, Sam. That's one of them! One of those guys!"

"Run." Sam replied, grabbing me again.

Our feet took off in the direction of a busted wooden fence which led out of the park. The man was still shouting after us, yelling for us to stop but we kept moving. After Sam helped me through the broken boards he squeezed through next, and we started running for... I don't have any idea where, but I followed my brother until the park was long in the distance and we came to a busted up grocery store.

"Inside!" Sam commanded, running for one of the broken windows. He boosted me up and inside, then followed.

We halfway crouched half way ran through the isles which were covered in spoiled foods and shattered pickle jars.

"Wh-where do we go now?" I asked, on the verge of tears.

"It'll be ok, kiddo. Don't worry. I'm here."

I held onto his free arm as he led me through the store, which was thankfully completely deserted.

"We have to make a stand somewhere. We can't keep running, they'll just chase us down til we can't move anymore." Sam pushed through the swinging double doors which led to the storage area.

Inside was stacks and stacks of cardboard boxes, most were littered with bullet holes, or had been slashed to pieces. Others were still intact, but lying in the way of the path. Sam lightly shoved them aside with his foot, his gun was still raised as his eyes darted from every section of the room.

He finally found a decent sized cubby space between two large stacks of boxes and told me to duck inside.

"Where are you going?" I whispered.

"I'm gonna lead them back here, then we'll ambush them."

"But... You can't do that! You can't go out there alone!"

"Shh, Lara. Calm down. I'll be fine. I'm a fast runner, but like I said. We gotta end this."

Of course I was freaking out now. My only brother was wanting to go out and face two mad men all alone. He had one gun, they might have had several for all I knew. A tear trickled down my cheek as I watched Sam quietly sneak his way back through the double doors.

Yes, something was definitely wrong here. It felt odd and awkward for me to actually cry- Something told me that in the past it didn't happen very often. But, how many times in my past had I ever been in a situation like this?

Everything went frighteningly silent- I couldn't hear anything but for my own heavy breathing. My hands were still shaking as I gripped my pistol and waited for Sam to re-emerge through the double doors. When I heard a sudden shatter of glass followed by a gunshot- I jumped to my feet.

Sam burst through the double doors, thankfully unharmed but he was running.

"They're coming. I think I got one." He said, grabbing my hand and for the millionth time pulling me away.

There was a back exit to the store about twenty feet from us, which we could easily sprint to if we didn't trip over any boxes. But out of no where the man in the trench-coat appeared in front of us.

I shrieked and fell backwards, immediately raising my pistol and firing. I saw it hit him directly in the chest but nothing happened- He didn't fall. Sam scooped me back up and we somehow pushed past him and out the exit.

Through the parking lot and past a set of trees was our only option, so we started for that. The shouting behind us continued as the trench-coated man yet again appeared in front of us. Sam took a swing at him and struck him in the jaw, but he was unfazed. Sam however instantly cradled his hand and started moaning from pain- I had clearly heard at least one bone snap after he punched him.

"Stop this." The man said sternly. "We aren't your enemy."

Sam didn't listen and we started running again, bursting through the treeline and into a thicket of forest.

I had no idea how we were going to escape, since the man in the trench-coat somehow managed to teleport himself to wherever we went. But, at least with so many trees around us, and how fast we were running for the moment we seemed to have dodged him.

It felt like we had been running for hours, and when we did finally stop to take a breather- The sun was starting to rise over the treetops.

"Sam, we can't keep doing this." I sobbed. "They're going to find us. That one guy, he's like a frickin monster or something. I shot him right in the chest and he didn't blink an eye."

"I know." He brought up his broken hand and cringed. "When I hit him it felt like I was punching a brick wall."

"What the hell is he?"

"I don't know, Lara... Something bad."

For the moment I stuffed my pistol down the front of my pants and examined Sams hand- Somehow I knew how to feel for broken bones... Maybe I had been a nurse or something? His ring finger on his left hand was clearly broken, but other than that he was ok.

"We need to patch you up somehow... But we don't have any supplies." I said.

"I'll survive. We'll deal with that after..."

We both sat down and rested against the base of a tree, staring up at the slowly brightening sky. I was so exhausted I could barely keep my eyes open, and Sam as well looked just as bad.

"You said you got one?" I muttered.

"Yeah, the guy in the gray jacket. But I think it was just a flesh wound to the shoulder."

"Maybe they'll take the hint and back off. We're armed and know how to shoot. They'd be stupid to keep chasing us."

"I don't think they care about that." He took a few deep breaths, trying to ignore the pain in his hand. "They had this crazy look in their eyes. If we don't get outa here, or take them out first, they're gonna kill us, Lara."

I knew that. One way or the other, someone was going to die- And I was bound and determined to make certain it wasn't me or Sam.

Sam must have allowed me to doze off, because when I felt him nudge me, my eyes shot open and I noticed the sun was up and shining brightly. I felt a little more spry since I had gotten some rest but he still looked miserable.

"Time to move." He helped me up from the ground. "I haven't heard anything in a couple hours- So, it must be safe."

His hand was swollen and blue in three places, he was cradling it at his side as he kept his gun in the opposite hand. If it came down to fighting face to face, he would be at a disadvantage, so I knew I would have to step up and help instead of trembling like an idiot.

The forest was much more inviting in the daylight, even though there weren't many leaves left on the trees. It was just nice being able to see what might have been around you.

When we came to the edge we were on the other end of town. Everything was still dead quiet, but that didn't settle my nerves at all. So far we had encountered three crazies in the town, plus the two men who for some odd reason had a vendetta against us. We entered the streets and warily skulked behind vehicles and anything that would hide us. With no where to hide, and no way of knowing who might be in which building we were practically sitting ducks out there.

Sam motioned towards what looked like a post office, which front wall had been completely blown away.

"It might be empty in there. Let's check it out." He said.

I knew his reasonings weren't because the building looked empty, but because clearly lying on its side out front was a soda machine, which was hanging open. Cans of cokes were lying all across the pavement- And Sam or I hadn't eaten or drank anything in... I wasn't sure how long since for the moment our memories were completely fucked up.

We darted across the street and grabbed a few of the cans that hadn't exploded and stuffed them in our pockets. He cracked one open and took a few gulps before sharing it with me.

Staying in one place for too long was dangerous, so we kept on the move rounding the side of the post office only to find that we were trapped. As soon as we saw the chain link fence that completely encircled us, we turned to leave only to see that the man in the trench-coat was blocking our exit.

Sam immediately rose his gun, but it was suddenly knocked from his hands by the man in the gray jacket. He tackled Sam and pinned him to the ground while his buddy came at me. I started screaming and throwing punches, ignoring how much it ached my hands to actually hit him. Since he was apparently some sort of superhuman and couldn't feel my strikes, he didn't have any issues at wrapping his arm around me from behind and pinning my own arms back so I couldn't move. With his free hand he clamped it over my mouth to keep me from screaming.

"Let her go you son of a bitch!" Sam screamed as he struggled against the other man.

"Sam! Calm the fuck down!" The other man screamed, as he literally sat on his chest to subdue him. "We aren't gonna hurt you, now shut up before the others hear you."

Sam didn't comply and somehow flung him off of his chest.

"Cas, you're gonna have to deal with Sam he's like a frickin linebacker."

I was suddenly tossed into whom I realized now was Deans arms as he clamped his hand over my mouth and kept my arms pinned behind my back. Cas descended onto Sam so quickly he barely had the chance to blink before he lied his fingertips against my brothers forehead and he went unconscious. Then like Sam weighed no more than a sack of potatoes, Cas somehow lugged him across his shoulders and carried him.

"Now listen to me, Lara." Dean said. "We aren't gonna hurt you, understand- We're trying to help you. I don't wanna have to knock you out somehow, so can I trust that you aren't gonna scream?"

Under the circumstances what other choice did I have other than to comply? Sam was completely out, and maybe even severely hurt. So, I nodded frantically in response.

"Good." Dean pulled his hand from my mouth. "Ok, Cas. Get us outa here."

Within seconds we were no longer standing in the parking lot of the post office, now it seemed we were in the center of a small and musty basement.

"Tie him up." Dean said. "He's gonna flip out again once he wakes up."

Cas only nodded and positioned Sam against a post and tied his hands securely behind him. Sams head was slumped with his chin digging into his chest, and I couldn't even tell if he was breathing.

"What the hell did you do to him?" I asked, only to find myself the next to be tied up.

"He's fine, just takin a little siesta." After my hands were tied around the post from behind, Dean stood and let out a sigh. "Now, you keep quiet- No screaming, and we might get lucky and not get our asses killed."

"Where are we?"

"Still in Colquitt."

I shook my head, my eyes darting frantically around the basement. "Where is Colquitt?"

Dean and Cas looked at each other. "What the hell is wrong with them?"

"War." Cas said. "Apparently his powers have the ability of completely wiping away past memories, not just instilling paranoia."

"Awesome, just friggin awesome. What the hell are we supposed to do with these two nutcases?"

"The chances of them returning to normal once War is vanquished is high. Since the previous two horsemens abilities disappeared when they did."

Dean began to pace, and I could only watch with my heart racing. We were the nutcases? I think it was the other way around, after all they just frickin kidnapped us!

"We should have brought Bobby with us, but- He might have went loco right along with them. We need to snap them out of it, Cas. We can't go up against a horseman with just the two of us."

"I agree- But there is no way to counteract the affects. I don't have that power."

I tried to budge my hands, but the ropes were tight to the point of my skin being pinched. After grimacing in pain, I knew that the only way to get out of this was if Sam somehow woke up... I just hoped he actually would.


	26. Chapter 26

Luckily Sam did wake up around ten minutes later. As soon as his eyes opened, he freaked out at noticing Dean and Cas standing before us.

"Lara... Are you ok? Did they hurt you?"

"Oh comon-" Dean snapped. "Knock it off. We aren't going to hurt you."

Sam ignored him for the most part, but made sure to glare at him. "Lara?"

"I'm fine... Are you ok?"

He tried giving me a smile, but I could tell he was freaking out. "We'll get out of this. I promise."

"Jeez. I'm gonna have a freak out of my own, here." Dean rubbed his face. "Ok, let's have a little talk here guys. First things first, you need to believe me when I say that Cas and I-" He pointed from himself to Cas. "Are not the enemy here. You both have been brainwashed."

Sam snickered. "Right. _We've _been brainwashed. You two freaks have been chasing us all night!"

"Have we?" Dean leaned forward in Sams face. "If we wanted you dead, you'd be dead. Think about it, Sammy- Something ain't right here. Don't you think it's strange that you and Lara suddenly lost your memories?"

Sam looked at me and shook his head. "Don't listen to them, kiddo- They're trying to trick us."

Dean cursed and kicked at the ground stirring up a cloud of dust. "Cas, I'm gonna seriously punch them both in the throat. You handle this."

"Me? Dean, I think it would be best if you explained this. You're their brother."

"Brother?!" Sam shrieked. "You expect us to believe that bullshit?"

Dean put his hands on his hips and stared at the ceiling- He seemed as though he was trying to calm down.

"Ok, I got it-" He walked towards me and started rifling through my jacket.

"Get your hands off her!" Sam shouted in response.

"Sammy, dude- I swear. You yell one more time I'm gonna cram my foot in your mouth." Dean glared at him, then started through my pockets again before pulling out my cell phone.

After he had it he started clicking around on the screen before turning it and showing me what was there.

"Look at this-" He shoved the phone in my face. "See that picture?"

I tried to sit back, but the pole prevented me from moving- I barely glanced at the picture before looking away in confusion.

"Yeah, see that? That's me... You took this picture. I was drunk and passed out and you thought it would be funny to draw on my friggin face." He scowled.

I examined the picture more closely. It was clearly the same man, he was lying on a sofa and there was a crudely drawn twirled mustache, beard and monocle on his face with black marker.

"You did that about a month ago at Bobbys. Remember Bobby?" He asked.

I shook my head in response and he switched to the next picture, which he then held in front of Sams face.

"See, Sammy. You and me, _together_. Now, if we were some nutso killers why would there be pictures of us on Laras phone? Why would mine _and_ Cas' number be in her contacts? Explain that?"

Sam and I looked at each other, clearly confused... No, more than confused- Completely baffled is more like it, or maybe even flabbergasted.

"This doesn't make sense." I said. "If we know you, then how come we can't remember you? Why were you chasing us?"

"We weren't chasing you." Cas spoke. "We were trying to stop you from getting yourselves killed- This town is very dangerous."

I tried to get some kind of reassurance from Sam, but he looked the same as I felt.

"Then... What happened? Why are we like this?" He asked.

"Yeah, that's a little hard to explain without you wiggin out on us again." Dean sighed. "Ok, I'll give it a shot. We came here together because we were trying to stop a horseman... Ring any bells?"

We both shook our heads.

"Ok, great-" Dean rolled his eyes. "Look, I don't exactly have the time to sit here and draw you both a frickin picture, so you're just gonna have to trust me on this. We're working together, we need your help to stop this ass-hat or else thousands of people are gonna die."

"Is he some kind of terrorist?" I asked.

Dean arched both brows, then shrugged. "Ok, we'll go with that. Yes, and he's dangerous and is gonna move on from this town as soon as everyone has killed each other. What we need to do is figure out what he looks like, and where he's hiding."

"But first you need to explain what your first memories happen to be." Cas interrupted.

"Uh..." Sam started. "The first thing I can remember is... Running, and thinking that you guys were gonna kill us."

"No, Sam- You forgot... First we were standing behind that house, and that dude came over." I said.

"Dude?" Dean moved closer. "What dude?"

"I dunno, he was freaking out and saying that people were chasing him. Remember, Sammy?"

He nodded. "Yeah, he said something about... Tomatoes... and... shotguns, I don't know- It's a little hazy. But yeah, he was scared and needed help."

"Come to think of it." My eyes flitted off to Cas, who stood stone faced and stiff. "I don't remember seeing him after Sam and I started freaking out. It was as if he was there one second and gone the next."

"You're right... He was the one to warn us that you two were going to kill us."

Dean arched his brows and nodded. "Ok, good- We're getting somewhere. Remember anything else about this guy? Anything strange?"

Sam went into thought, as did I before I sat up straight, well as straight as I could with my hands being tied.

"He kept twirling his ring. I guess that could have been a nervous tick or something..."

Dean smacked his hands together and stood up straight, smirking at Cas. "War... Frickin War... Ok, what did he look like?"

I shrugged. "Average I guess. Not really tall, he was wearing a dark suit and had glasses."

"And the ring?"

"It was just a plain gold wedding band." Sam answered for me.

Dean paced for a moment, while Cas watched him with scrunched brows. I don't know why that seemed familiar to me. Or, well, maybe I did considering I actually knew these people in the past.

"Here's what we need to do." Dean said. "I'm gonna untie you, Sammy- And you're not gonna go all ballistic on me, got it? You're gonna help me search for this guy. Cas, you're gonna stay here and look after Lara, cause let's face facts... The chick is crazy right now."

"Hey!" I snapped.

"Trust me, you'll thank me for this later. And once you realize how bat shit nuts you're acting, you'll want to kick your own ass. You can't even fight, you're scared outa your mind."

Well... He was right about that. I definitely was scared, which for some odd reason was pissing me off.

"So, do we have a deal? Sam, you gonna behave?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah, I'm good. Somehow I believe you."

Dean knelt over and untied Sams hands, he stood afterwards and his head practically hit the low ceiling.

"Dean, I'm not certain this is wise." Cas interjected. "If War managed to completely alter Lara and Sams thought process, he could very well do the same to you."

"Gotta take the chance, man. Lara is in no fighting condition. _So_ that means you're in charge of the cuckoos nest Nurse Ratched."

Cas looked confused after that statement, and could only watch silently as Dean trusted Sam enough to hand him back his gun. Before they climbed the old weathered steps, Sam turned and nodded to me.

"It'll be ok. We'll fix this, and hopefully things will be back to normal."

The only thing I could do was frown as I watched them both climb the stairs and disappear through the basement door. Once they were gone and the basement was completely silent, I allowed myself to gaze around the smelly room.

The only light source was an old kerosine lantern sitting on the floor, and there was nothing else here besides cobwebs and dust. That and of course, the mystery man called Cas.

This was awkward... More than awkward and I wasn't sure why. Should I try making conversation with the guy? Or should I just completely ignore him? If Dean told the truth and he was indeed my brother, than what was he?

"So..." I said, minding my tone. "We know each other?"

Cas unfolded his arms and seemed to relax to the point where he wasn't a statue.

"Yes." He said.

"Wow... Informative." I rolled my eyes. "And, are we related?"

"No."

"Ook... Then are we friends?"

He nodded slightly. "Yes, I would say we're friends."

I fidgeted and let out a slight groan. "Dude, do you think maybe you could loosen these ropes a little? They're starting to cut off circulation."

Thankfully he didn't deny my request and knelt down beside me and tugged at the ropes until I could finally feel my fingers again. Once he was through he hesitated standing as he grabbed my chin and gazed at my forehead.

"You must have taken a blow to the head sometime during the skirmish. But it doesn't seem to be anything serious."

"O-oh." I swallowed a lump in my throat. "And, uh... Well, how are you? Ya know... I sorta shot you back there."

He looked at me with squinty eyes and said. "I survived."

After he stood and moved back to where he was previously standing I finally managed to breathe again.

"Well clearly. But, aren't you hurt?"

"No. Bullets have no affect on me."

Uhh, Ok. What the heck was this guy? I was starting to freak out even more than I already was. What kind of person did Sam leave me with? He was immune to bullets and punches, and could carry my gigantic brother over his shoulders like he weighed nothing... Freak of nature maybe, I had no clue.

"Do you think maybe you could just untie me? Obviously I'm not going anywhere, and even if I tried you would just shazam me back here."

He contemplated that for a moment before shifting his eyes to the door- Almost as if he expected Dean to return and catch him in the act.

Dean obviously was the leader of our little group or something, at least he seemed like it. He was certainly bossy enough and Cas didn't act as though he wanted to get on his bad side. But, I dunno- Maybe he felt sorry for me or something, because he knelt down a second time and pulled the ropes off completely.

"Thanks." I muttered. "So, what are we gonna do now? Just sit here?"

"Apparently so."

"Do you really think that's such a good idea? It's dangerous out there, and they're all alone."

I could have swore I saw him roll his eyes at me.

"No, I don't think it's a good idea- But you don't argue with Dean. There's simply no purpose."

Since my hands were free I started pacing around the small basement and I could just feel Cas' eyes burning into me. And even though I _was_ afraid, this town was dangerous and I still didn't like the thought of Sam being out there without me to help him. But, there was no chance of me slipping past Cas, what with his teleportation skills and all.

We weren't alone very long, maybe around twenty minutes when I heard footsteps creaking across the floors above. Of course I assumed it was Sam and Dean, and they had returned unscathed, but just as I was heading for the stairs Cas suddenly grabbed me and pushed me back against the wall, yet again covering my mouth with his hand.

"It isn't Sam or Dean." He said quietly.

He raised his free hand and like magic the light from the lantern was extinguished. After that a shiny silver blade suddenly slid from his coat sleeve.

"Stay here. Don't make a sound. I'll handle them."

The only thing I could do was nod since my mouth was still covered, but then with a slight gust of wind and flutter he was gone. Seconds later there was an obvious scuffle above me, I could hear a few crashes and bumps, along with quiet screams before bodies thumped like rocks on the floor- Then... Complete silence.

I could only breathe in short fast pants, my heart was racing so quickly I thought I would pass out- But somehow I forced myself away from the wall and slowly inched my way towards the stairs.

"We need to leave here." Cas suddenly said behind me, which caused me to swing around in terror.

"What? Leave?"

"More will be coming, it's dangerous to remain here." He didn't ask any questions before stomping towards me and lying his hand on my shoulder.

With a poof we were no longer in the basement, but somewhere in town. By the looks of it we were behind some sort of old business, which windows had long ago been boarded up.

Cas kept his knife at the ready, which was now stained in blood before he grabbed my hand and started pulling me along. I was surprised by the gesture, but not because it was unexpected or uncomfortable, but because it seemed to give me some sort of confirmation that I could trust this guy. I don't know why, it was just a feeling.

Past the building was a dead end street, which opposite end had been barricaded off by vehicles and a crudely made barrier which consisted of pieces of furniture and old doors. Several of the buildings were still on fire from the latest looting session, and I could clearly hear shouting in the distance.

We barely stopped long enough to figure out our location before he started off again, continuing with dragging me along. Past the street was another alley which we headed towards. We weren't halfway through when two groups of people blocked us in from each end.

Naturally I started to panic, and after taking a short circle, Cas scowled slightly before poofing us to yet another section of town.

"What the hell?" I asked, trying not to hyperventilate. "Is that what we're gonna do? Just teleport all over the place?"

He said nothing and we slipped into the busted open door of a two story brick building. He lightly shoved me into a corner before pulling his phone from his coat.

I watched him dial, peaking over his shoulder to see it was Dean he was calling.

"Dean." He said. "What's happening?"

I couldn't hear what Dean might have said, but seeing is that I didn't hear any shouting over his end I figured he was relatively safe for the moment.

"We had to leave the basement, and Lara is currently in the process of what appears to be a psychotic episode."

Taken aback, I couldn't help but scowl at that.

He listened to whatever it was Dean had to say before hanging up and slipping his phone back in his pocket.

"We keep moving." He stated.

"To where?"

"Anywhere, so we won't have to fight."

He kept tugging me with him, not even giving me a chance to object.

"But, why? I can throw punches just like anyone."

"Dean doesn't want you..." He caught himself. "We're going to be a distraction."

"A distraction? What do you mean?"

We stopped at corner of a four way intersection, which was thankfully dead quiet.

"Sam and Dean are trying to hunt down the horseman. We're to lure all of the people out of their hiding places and keep their attention solely on the two of us- So that they might be able to make their way through town safely."

"And you expect for us to somehow dodge what could be an entire towns population? You don't think we're gonna have to end up fighting?"

"_If _the situation turns where we have no choice but to fight, then I'll be the one to do it. Because Dean was right, you're in no state to be jumping into a battle."

Normally I would be inclined to agree, but he was only one man- Granted, I had no weapons seeing is that my idiot brother took them all... Wait a second... Did I just refer to Dean as my brother? No, now I was getting side tracked. Yeah, ok, I had no weapons but I had my fists, and seeing is that I somehow knew how to fight I would have to push aside my extreme fear and step my ass up.

Now the question that remained was what exactly did Cas mean by horseman? Did he mean an actual horseman? Like the one depicted in the bible? If so, then Sam and Dean definitely needed a hand. Even though I was having difficulty in remembering details of my life, some things were becoming a little more clear. At least I wasn't convinced that Dean or Cas was going to kill me anymore.


	27. Chapter 27

Run... Run... Run... That's what I kept telling myself. Don't stop, no matter how exhausted I was, no matter how much my sides were aching, no matter how much I couldn't breathe- I couldn't stop running. To make a long story short I had gotten separated from Cas. We had stuck together for nearly three hours before we were ambushed by a crowd of twenty people. Basically, I got pushed away before he could zap us away and my only choice was to run for my life while a group of ten crazies chased me.

I had no idea where I was going as I leapt over mounds of debris, and these people just wouldn't let up. They were being fueled by something that I wasn't lucky enough to be blessed with, which was giving them the endurance that I was sorely lacking. But I couldn't stop because the second I slowed down they would swamp me and I would be torn to shreds.

As quickly and nimbly as possible I darted down a side street and directly into a lane of parked cars ducking in between them as I heard the crowd approaching. For the moment they couldn't see me and I wanted to keep it that way. I slithered like a snake on my belly from one car to the next, taking quick peaks under them to see dozens of feet moving closer.

"Separate!" A man said. "She could be anywhere!"

The group did as told and broke off into groups of two which all spread out through the parked vehicles. I was a good fifty feet away for the moment, and before they could get closer crawled under vehicle after vehicle, successfully scraping up my palms and knees might I add. Past this area and on the edge of town was an old farm house and barn. No, I wasn't going to run for it, but I was hoping they would give up at searching for me in the cars and think that I had.

I made certain to go in the opposite direction of the majority of the group. A few that actually walked past me didn't even think to look under the vehicles, but what lunatic would actually hide under cars that were smoking or had been on fire? Answer? Me...

It took nearly ten agonizing minutes before the group decided I wasn't in the area and took off at a quick jog down the street. I waited until I could no longer hear their footsteps before sliding out from under a burnt BMW, but kept myself low to the ground just in case. First thing I did was reach for my phone in my jacket, only to feel nothing inside.

Dammit... I had forgotten that Dean had taken my phone out in the frickin basement, and I just left it lying on the floor. There went calling for help.

As I crawled I came across a tire iron lying next to one of the vehicles. Luck was on my side I guess, if you wanted to think being on your own in a town full of nut jobs was luck. There was no telling where my brothers were, or Cas for that matter, but I decided to go back in the direction where I had last seen Cas.

My throat was bone dry and I was about ready to keel over from being so tired, but I still managed to jog my way up alleys and down side streets until coming to where I had last seen him.

There were bodies lying all over the street, he had managed to fight off nearly twelve people all on his own, but he himself was no where in site.

I started spun in small circles, taking in my surroundings. Dead silence.

There was no way of knowing where the hell everyone was. Even though this town was no large city, it was still big enough to get lost in. On one hand I thought it might be better to just haul up in an empty building positioned by a window so I could see if anyone was coming or going- But on the other hand, I thought it might be best to keep moving. Out of the two options, hiding like a friggin baby just made me feel shame for even contemplating it. So I suppose to keep moving was my choice.

I moved past the bodies Cas left behind and eventually worked my way back to the main street. In the distance I saw a pay phone. A _payphone_ thank god. It was risky taking the time to try and make a call but I darted for it and slipped inside, not bothering to close the door just in case more crazies showed up.

After popping in the change and dialing the only phone number I could remember, which was Sams- I listened to it ring a good five times before he picked up.

"Hello?"

"Ugh, Sam thank god. Where the hell are you?"

"Lara? Are you ok? Cas said you got separated."

"Dude, be quick here- I don't have a lot of time. Where are..."

My words cut off when the crowd I had lost not an hour before rounded the edge of a building across the street.

"Oh shit, they're back." I muttered.

"Who? Lara hurry, tell me where you are?"

"Main street."

I threw the receiver down and took off running as yet again I was being chased. This was getting ridiculous and it now came down to who could run the longest. The crowd was screaming obscenities and death threats as we ran which only motivated me to move faster.

After hopping a small fence and tripping while I was at it, I tried to ignore a cut on my shin as I started for a vehicle, any vehicle that hadn't been gutted. There was one that had one flat tire, but other than that it was intact- I didn't care if all of the tires were flat I would drive the damn thing on its rims as long as it would run.

I quickly busted the drivers side door and unlocked it, pulling it open. No keys, naturally, but before I could question it I had began to hot-wire. Yet again, another skill or memory that was managing to break past the wall this horseman had put up in my mind.

The engine was trying its best to fire up, and I cursed lightly at nearly twenty failed attempts.

Out of no where I felt someone grab me by the shoulders and tried to pull me through the busted window. I squealed and grabbed my tire iron and didn't even bother to look before jamming it at the man. To my horror, and slight delight, the end went straight into a large bald mans left eye socket. He quickly fell down dead and I couldn't be bothered to freak out over killing someone because I had seconds to get the fucking car started and peel out before the rest of the crowd reached me.

Hearing the engine start was like music to my ears and I quickly cranked it in drive and floored it. The car swerved and burned rubber on the street as I took a sharp right and headed in the direction of the crowd. They started diving out of the way, but after closing my eyes and hearing several thumps from under the car, I was jostled in my seat.

The rear view mirror showed I had run over two people, what looked like women and they weren't moving anymore. I let out a sigh of relief as I carefully steered the car around garbage and crap in the streets. More and more people seemed to flood from out of no where as they heard the car. Several dove onto the hood and climbed up on the windshield, while two more were on the trunk.

I tried swerving to knock them off but they were stuck on there like glue. Suddenly in the passenger seat Cas appeared which nearly made me crash into a parked truck.

"Are you hurt?" He asked.

"Not now... A little busy." I answered. "You might want to hold on to something."

The car flew into an empty parking lot and I immediately started spinning doughnuts. Two people flew off and rolled across the pavement, while the remainder held strong. One man was sprawled across the windshield to the point I couldn't see so I flipped on the windshield wipers and washer fluid as he began sputtering. Had I not been so terrified it would have been pretty amusing to watch.

As the soap got in his eyes he started screaming and swatting and eventually flew off and slammed into a light post. With one guy still clinging to the bumper I slammed on the breaks and quickly cranked it in reverse. With two loud and disgusting crunches he was flattened but I backed up an extra two times for good measure. Once it was quiet, and there were no more crazies chasing after me I stopped the car and lied my head on the steering wheel.

"Holy crap." I said, out of breath.

"You're bleeding." Cas said, leaning over his seat and noticing my cut leg and scuffed up hands.

"It's not bad... Just a few scratches. Where are Sam and Dean? Are they ok?"

"They're fine, but are still searching for the horseman."

"This being separated is bullshit, Cas. We need to do this together. Just take me to them so we can get this over and done with, please."

He eyed me for a moment before reaching over and lying his hand on my shoulder. We were moved from the car and back to the park from the night before. Sam and Dean weren't in site for the moment, but when I heard someone whistle from the bushes, I saw Sam waving us over.

I limped my way over and gave him a tight hug, then surprised myself when I did the same with Dean.

"Jeez. Did you get into a fight with a pack of pissed off cats?" Dean asked.

"I wish." I replied. "These people, they just don't let up."

"But you're ok?" Sam smiled slightly. "You strong enough to keep going?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Let's find this asshole already and get the fuck back to Bobbys."

Dean stood up straight and grinned. "Bout damn time you get your memory back. Or some of it at least."

"It's been coming back in bits and pieces." I replied. "There's still a lot I'm confused about though."

"Lara took down a small group of people, I would say that she's mentally stable enough to fight now." Cas announced.

Dean mussed my hair, which for a short second I found it endearing. "How'd you do it? I took your gun."

"I ran them over with a car I hot-wired. It wasn't pretty."

Both brothers cringed slightly, and Dean finally reached into his jacket and handed me back my gun.

"Let's move." He waved for us to follow.

We moved through the park and I didn't bother to ask where we were going, because it seemed they had a particular destination in mind.

After the park was long in the distance we returned to the residential area from the night before where Sam and I first encountered the strange man. Dean made it a point that we were completely silent as Sam motioned towards the very house we had been hiding behind when this horseman appeared.

"We don't separate this time." Dean said. "We're not gonna take any chances of someone else going crazy."

We all finally agreed on something and I was stuck in the middle of our conga line as Dean kept his gun raised through the alley.

I completely ignored my limp as we came to the tree where the horseman had been.

"This is the spot." Sam whispered.

"Ok, now we search the house." Dean pointed to a set of stairs leading into the backdoor.

Cas actually went up first this time and carefully pushed the door open, thankfully it didn't give the stereotypical loud groan in response like you see in so many movies. After a quick peak inside he nodded to us and we came up next. I wanted to ask how they were so sure the guy would still be here, but they must have known something I didn't.

Inside the house was dark but for a few streams of sunlight that poured through gaps in the boarded up windows. The rooms were bare of anything valuable, and all that remained was couch stuffing and torn up books and magazines. Thankfully though there were no dead bodies. Dean seemed almost as if he was being led by a pulley, he started up the stairs immediately and once we reached the top there was a short hallway with only three doors.

He nodded and Cas and Sam went to each door while Dean went to the last. Like instinct I followed behind Dean and he mouthed "On three."

Both Cas and Sam were ready, so I rose my gun and Dean finally held up his free hand.

"One... Two... Three." He whispered.

In unison every door was pushed open but only one room wasn't empty. The one behind the door that Dean had opened.

I didn't even wait for it, I immediately started firing at the man sitting on the end of a bed. There wasn't a reason to think twice, I knew already it was the same guy that had messed with Sam and mines head. I wasn't the only one that started firing, Dean did as well- Not that it did much good. With each bullet that struck him he sat unfazed and smirking. I found it strange how he didn't even try to escape.

Cas stomped into the room but before he could grab him the man stood and held up a hand.

"Stop." He said, continuing to smile. "I'm not going to fight against you."

Dean and Sam pushed forward, and of course we weren't going to fall for anything this asshole said. He was a horseman, not only was that mind bogglingly crazy to think about, but if he had the capability of turning an entire town against each other then what else could he do to us?

"Look," He continued. "I've had my fun here and I know what you've done to my brothers. Did you know that forcefully removing our rings actually kills us? Didn't know that did you? But, if I give it to you willingly, then-" He then stopped and pulled off his ring, then held it in the air as if he was taunting us to try and take it. "I don't really want to die so, I'll give it to you."

"Right." Sam sneered. "What's the catch?"

"No catch." He shrugged.

"You expect us to believe that?" Dean asked.

"I don't care what you believe." He waved the ring in the air. "Do you want it or not?"

Both boys looked at each other- It was obvious they were skeptical, and why shouldn't they be? I highly doubted any other horseman had been this cooperative.

Dean stepped forward, still with his gun raised and held out his free hand. The man only smirked before dropping the plain gold band in his palm.

"The only reason why I'm giving this to you is because I know I'll get it back." He grinned. "Because you've saved the best brother for last, boys. Death is not going to go down so easily... Or at all actually. You have _no _idea what you're getting yourselves into."

He vanished right before our eyes and Dean clenched the ring in his hand tightly. As soon as he disappeared, instantly I was overwhelmed with a flood of memories, enough so that I fell to my knees. Sam soon did the same. We both braced ourselves against the floor and tried to fight the waves of nausea accompanied with the dizziness.

Dean knelt down beside me and smacked me on the back

"You ok?" He asked, and I nodded in answer. "Sammy, you good?"

"Yeah." Sam grunted and pushed himself back to stand.

"Do ya got all your marbles back?" Dean helped me to my feet.

"Pretty sure." Sam rubbed his temples and blinked away the haze. "I'm glad that's over and done with." He looked to Dean. "Uh, sorry about shooting you last night."

"Oh yeah, good times." Dean rolled his eyes. "But it's ok, Cas fixed me up."

I took the ring from Deans hand and examined it. "So, you think this is the real deal?"

"Probably." Dean quickly snatched it back. "After all, he thinks Death is gonna get the jump on us and he'll just get it back eventually."

It was hard to believe we had actually been successful so far- Three rings down, one more to go. One last battle with the big boss and we could finally say good riddance to Lucifer.


	28. Chapter 28

"Looks like you're gonna need some stitches in that leg, tiger." Dean said. "The cut's pretty deep."

"Great." I said sarcastically, taking a long gulp of Jack Daniels. "Not as if I had anything else to do today."

He reached over and grabbed the med-kit, rummaging through until finding the proper utensils.

"Wanna do it yourself, or..."

"Funny thing is, is that I'm actually squeamish when it comes to blood... Well, my own anyways."

That was actually true. I had no problems at hacking my way through monsters but when it came to my own injuries there was something about it that made me queasy. Maybe because it only reminded me of my own mortality and you never know when one day you might bite the dust. Funny thing is, is that I was actually petrified of dying, kind of ironic actually considering what my life profession happened to be. But yeah, everyone has their vices, and my croaking happened to be it. Yeah I know I had attempted to sacrifice myself for my brothers and Cas in the past, but that's different. Sometimes you have to set aside your own fears and do what you need to do. Yeah, dying would suck ass, but... Hey, I guess we all gotta go sometime?

"Dude-" I said, grabbing Deans wrist. "Wash your hands, you trying to kill me?"

Dean scowled at that. "Oh comon now, a little bit of germs won't hurt you none."

"Nice try, give yourself blood poisoning but not me."

Thankfully Dean actually listened to me and washed his hands before stitching up my leg. I tried to numb the pain by getting partially drunk- Which somewhat helped but not enough that I could ignore that retched needle. And, if I had a hangover in the morning luckily we didn't have any jobs lined up and for the moment were slumming it at Bobbys.

After my leg was stitched and bandaged Bobby stormed into the house and pulled Sam and Dean aside. They had a semi heated discussion which was at whisper level before my brothers grabbed their jackets.

"We gotta take off for a few." Dean announced. "Lara, just stay here and sleep off your buzz. You need to stay off that leg anyways."

"Wait, what?" I tried to sit up. "What's going on?"

"Ain't nothin to worry your pretty little head over." Bobby said, which I didn't buy. "Just listen to your brother."

Yeah I might have actually done that if they all didn't look like they were about to crap themselves. Duh, something was up- Even being half drunk I could see that.

"Cas should be back soon." Sam said, with his usual little smile. "So, you won't be alone."

"I don't give a crap about being alone. What the hell is going on?"

"Nothing, Lara. Just drop it, ok?" Deans voice was stern, it hadn't been that way in a long time, at least with me. "We'll handle it, and you're gonna keep your ass on that couch."

I hated when he took on that Father tone with me as if I was a ten year old. He had to have known it only pissed me off and motivated me to do the exact opposite of what he wanted me to do. But, I didn't get the chance to come back with a snippy reply before they walked outside and slammed the door. Bobby of course got in his car, and since Sam and Dean were taking the impala I was stuck- Because, of course, Cas hadn't yet fixed my mustang. But, since we got back he hadn't really been around- He was off doing whatever he always did when he was on his own. I assumed it was trying to search for the last remaining horseman, but who knows really.

After they peeled out of the drive I fell back on the pillow and stifled back a scream. How stupid of me to think that they were going to dismiss this little sister bullshit and actually treat me like part of the team. Yeah, that wasn't ever gonna happen. No matter how old I got, or how much I proved myself to them, I would always be the little one.

But I hated to admit that Dean was a tiny bit right this time around. I was clearly on my way to a drunken idiotic stuper, and my leg was throbbing. Even if they allowed me to go with them I probably wouldn't have been able to shoot straight, or run if the chance called for it. I would have been a hindrance, which of course with our lifestyle would end up getting everyone killed.

Even though Dean might have been right, I still didn't like it. I felt just as responsible for them as they did me, and I didn't dig the thought of not being able to watch their backs.

Luckily though I passed out not long after they left, so I didn't have to think about it anymore.

When I woke up it was morning, and there sat Sam and Dean at the kitchen table as though they had never been gone at all. Cas was standing against the counter, Bobby was at the stove... What the hell... Did I hallucinate the entire night because I was drunk?

That seemed to be the case as I rolled off the couch and limped into the kitchen. I stood there for a good minute or so examining each man, waiting for one of them to talk about last nights events.

"Hey, how's the leg?" Dean asked.

"What the hell happened?" I asked.

Sam and Dean looked at me, confused.

"What are you talking about?" Sam shook his head. "You were asleep?"

"No- What happened last night? Where did you three run off to?"

Dean chuckled and made the motion with his hand that I had been drinking, which only made me more angry.

"I'm serious guys-" I looked to Cas now. "What happened?"

"Nothing happened." Dean intervened. "You drank a fifth of Jack when I was stitchin you up, you mumbled something about flying puppies, then passed out."

My arms crossed and if it wasn't for my pounding headache I might not have been so quick to believe them. No, I didn't _entirely _believe them just yet. Sam and Dean were pretty good liars most of the time and Bobby was conveniently ignoring me which only made them seem more guilty. But I knew if I continued to prod then they would clam up even more, so I decided to drop it for now. Besides, if I wanted answers then the only person that would give them to me would be Cas. Because let's face facts, the dude couldn't lie for shit- He was awful at it.

"Greasy breakfast can cure that hangover, kiddo." Sam said. "You want something?"

"I'd kill for a breakfast burrito." I said, lying obviously. My stomach was rolling, the last thing I wanted to do was fill it with sausage and eggs. "And some hash browns."

Sam chuckled. "I could go grab you one if you want?"

Perfect, I thought. Now if I could just get rid of Bobby and Dean so easily. But my puppy eyes never worked on Dean, and Bobby had stopped falling for that years ago. Sammy had a soft spot, which could be easily manipulated. Not that I did it often, in fact- I never really had. So I hardly thought that conning him into buying me a frickin burrito would send me to hell. I just needed them out of the house for ten minutes so I could corner Cas.

"Thanks." I smiled, yeah worked like a charm.

He jumped up from his seat and grabbed Deans keys. And yeah, I was surprised to see Dean follow.

"I need pie." He announced, grabbing his jacket.

Holy crap batman, was it really this easy to get rid of them? Or were they on to me? Nah, that couldn't be it- Because they would know I would grill Cas, and Dean would make damn certain that wouldn't happen. Hm, maybe I was a decent actress after all?

I waited until their car was out the drive before I as quickly as possible thought of a way to get Cas alone.

"Yo, Cas- Do you think you can do me that favor you promised?" I asked, and he looked at me momentarily confused. "Ya know... My car?"

"Oh... Of course."

He followed me from the house as I hobbled my way to the garage. Fixing my car was definitely on my "Cas to-do" list, but for the moment that wasn't what I was wanting to happen. He was going to tell me what they were hiding from me, one way or the other.

As soon as I closed the garage doors behind us I immediately scowled.

"Ok, spill it. What's going on?"

He turned away from my car, scrunching his brows. "What do you mean?"

"Don't even bother with that baby faced I don't know shit crap... I wasn't _that _drunk last night- I know damn well that they took off and ditched me, and you're going to tell me why."

I didn't want to get snippy with him, but I thought we were well past holding secrets and leaving me in the dust. It was offensive, and not to sound like a baby, but yeah- It hurt my feelings.

"If they truly did leave you behind last night- I know nothing about it." He said.

We stared at each other, my eyes searing into his like red hot pokers. His emotionless face and monotone voice hadn't changed, which of course made it difficult to determine whether or not he could be telling the truth- So I just took a shot in the dark.

"Ya know... You're a horrible liar- And I get that Dean probably yelled at you or swore you to secrecy, but comon. How much longer do I have to be with you people to prove that I'm trustworthy? How would it make you feel if I, or Sam or Dean, were keeping things from you? Wouldn't that bother you?" I shook my head. "No, of course it wouldn't. Because you have the ability to read peoples thoughts if it's really necessary. Lucky you."

"Lara it's not as though I..."

"It doesn't matter." I don't know why I was letting this get to me so much. Probably because I wanted to feel like I fit in with them one hundred percent. "Maybe things would have been different if John had never kept me hidden away, maybe if I was actually raised with my brothers they would take me seriously."

Great, I had gone and allowed myself to get upset to the point of wanting to cry. No friggin way. I don't cry... I hated it. And had Dean saw me in such a state it would just give him all the confirmation he needed that I wasn't strong enough- And proving to him that I _was_, was all I wanted.

"Just... Never mind." I said, turning away and opening the garage doors.

Cas reached up and slammed it closed again which made me jump. He kept me pinned there for a moment before stepping away.

"Last night I heard something." He said quietly, as if someone might have been listening. "The angels were communicating from heaven, and they claimed they had resurrected a very important piece for what they referred to was the game." He paused and I went stiff. "Their description of the apocalypse." My face went blank at hearing it was only a game to them. "When I investigated I came across a grave in the center of hundreds of felled forest life. Someone was trying to break free, and I was ambushed by several of my brothers. I was forced to cut them down."

I tried to croak out a response, but it was next to impossible. "Uh... Who was in the grave?"

His eyes shifted downwards before he answered. "It was your brother Adam."

No, wait a second... Did I just hear him correctly?

"Adam? Adam, as in my dead brother Adam? He's alive? They brought him back?"

"Yes."

Now I started to pace, if my leg was still throbbing I couldn't feel it anymore.

"Why would they bring Adam back?"

"According to what he told us, it was because he is to replace Dean as Michaels vessel."

I skidded to a stop. "What? No, no. Wait a second. If that's true then why isn't he here with us so we can watch out for him?"

"Sam and Dean thought it best to keep him elsewhere. They didn't want to alarm you."

"Alarm me? Of frickin course this alarms me. Adam can't be Michaels vessel, is he an idiot? Doesn't he realize what that would do?"

"He's well aware, but Zachariah has manipulated him- And bribed him with something he has no intention to give, which is bringing back his Mother."

After brushing my hair from my eyes I let out a deep breath. "Yeah, and of course old Zachy conveniently leaves out that Michael will turn him into a drooling invalid and not bother to fix him. What good would it do to bring his Mom back if he's a vegetable?"

Cas said nothing and only watched me pace. My mind was swirling now, my stomach was churning even more than it was before. It's not as though Adam and I had been close, I had only met him once before he died- But seriously, no one deserves that kind of crap- Especially since he had been lied into accepting this.

I honestly had no words, so I opened the garage door again and started back for the house. Somehow I managed to walk pretty damn fast considering my leg was killing me, and Cas jogged to catch up.

"What are you going to do?" He asked.

"Do? Well, I'll tell you what I'd _like _to do. What I'd like to do is kick Sam and Dean square in the nuts. But, something tells me that wouldn't go over very well." He had no response to that. "But yeah- I'm gonna talk to them, or at least try to. They shouldn't have kept this from me."

When we reached the house I saw the impala parked in the drive again. I paused for a moment to try and gather my thoughts before pushing the door open and stepping inside. Over and over again I told myself not to lose my temper, but yeah- We all know how that usually goes.

Sam was pulling food out of a to-go bag and lying it on the table. "Got your burrito, sport."

"Shove your burrito up your ass!" I snapped, which caused him to flinch.

He opened his mouth to respond but nothing would come out, instead he looked to Dean who arched both brows, then moved his eyes to Cas.

"_Really_?" He said. "Well, this has gotta be some kind of record huh, Cas? She got you again didn't she?"

"I..." Cas blabbered.

"One time, just _one_ time to keep his mouth shut is all I ask- Lara you gotta tell me what it is you do to get him to crack. Or how he somehow managed to keep the secret about you for so long, cause apparently he can't do it for anyone else."

"Shut up, Dean. Now where the hell is Adam?"

He moved across the kitchen and sat at the table where his pie waited. "It doesn't matter where he is."

"Dean. She already knows-" Sam said. "What's the purpose in keeping her out of the loop now?"

"You're just sayin that so she won't be pissed at you anymore. Apparently she's got you and Cas wrapped around her little finger."

Bobby sat his beer aside. "I think I'd like to know just how she knew about Adam in the first place."

"That's a good question." Sam looked at me. "How'd you know?"

"John told me about him. And before he died we met up once."

"Wait-" Dean pointed his fork at me. "You actually met him? So, he knows you?"

I nodded. "Uh, yeah. If you meet someone, then generally that means you're acquainted with that person."

"Don't get cute with me, sister- That don't work on me like it does with them." Now he jabbed his fork in a stabby manner towards Sam and Cas.

Sam ignored the gesture. "This might be a good thing. We aren't having any luck at talking sense into the guy, maybe she could?"

Dean shoved a heaping bite of pie in his mouth, acting as though he didn't hear that statement.

I moved to the table now and sat down, trying to not to shriek like a banshee.

"I'm sorry I blew up at you guys. But I just thought we were past holding secrets. I want to help with Adam, he's my brother too."

Maybe Dean did have a soft spot after all? Or, maybe he realized he was actually wrong for once and that he shouldn't have tried to lie about this, because he finally rolled his eyes and looked to Cas.

"Alright, fine. Go get him. Bring him back here." He said.

Cas nodded and poofed away, was gone for about ten seconds before returning with a very startled and angry Adam by his side. I stood immediately and faced him, and for a moment he didn't seem to realize who I was, but then his mouth went agape.

"Lara?" He said. "What are..."

"Long story, bud- We need to have a little talk."

He shook his head. "Not you too. Let me guess, you wanna spout the same crap that Sam and Dean have?"

"I don't know what crap they've been spewing but yeah you should at least hear me out."

He shrugged. "What choice do I have? I'm being held prisoner apparently."

I tugged him by the arm into Bobbys den, Sam and Dean tried to follow but I held up my hand.

"Not-uh. You guys aren't coming. I wanna talk to him alone."

Sam was the voice of reason as he coaxed Dean back into the kitchen. No, it wasn't exactly very private in the den, and chances were they could hear everything we said, but ya work with what ya got.

After sitting on the sofa and urging Adam to do the same, he reluctantly sat.

"So, what's up? Last I heard, you were dead?"

He rolled his eyes at me, moving his attention to out the window. "You know what's going on."

"Yeah, I do. And I can't help but ask myself how big of an idiot are you for ever believing anything those ass-monkey angels have to say?"

"Ass-monkey? Lara, they're _angels_. And if they tell me they can bring my Mom back if I help them out, then I'm gonna do it."

"Right-" I sat back and crossed one leg over the other. "Ok, so. Did they bother to tell you that this douche Michael is going to bake half the planet in his little bitch fight with Lucifer? Or, that after he's done riding you like a pony that you'd be better off dead again? That they probably have no intention what so ever of bringing your Mom back?"

"Why would they lie? Like I said, they're angels." He didn't look convinced, which wasn't surprising.

"Because believe it or not, angels lie. They don't have anyones best interest at heart except their own. They think the apocalypse is a game and we're just the chess pieces to move around to their liking. But what they don't realize is that there's a better way to stop Lucifer rather than killing billions of people."

"That doesn't matter to me."

"Really? So, you wouldn't mind if you were responsible for half the planet dying? So not only are you an idiot, but you're a dick too?" His mouth cinched to practically invisible. "Thanks a lot, bro. It's nice to know that you could just sit back and do nothing while your friends and family die. You really know how to make a girls heart melt."

"What the hell am I supposed to do? If I don't do it, my Mom doesn't come back."

I nodded. "And if you do do it, your Mom still doesn't come back, half the planet will be vaporized and you'll be left a vegetable, or just dead again. Yeah, sounds like a win win situation to me."

Adam sat back and finally allowed his eyes meet mine. "How do I know you're not full of shit?"

"Have you spoken to Cas at all? _Hellooo_, fellow angel who realizes himself that his family is a bunch of assholes. If an angel can actually admit to that, and sees them for what they really are, then why can't you?"

For a moment I actually thought I was getting to him, but after a minute of silence he shook his head.

"Look, all I know is that a day ago, I was dead and now here I am alive again. They made me a promise, and I can't take the risk of missing out on my Mom coming back. This doesn't have anything to do with you. I'm doing this for her."

I shook my head at him, making damn certain he saw the look on my face. Afterwards I stood and went back in the kitchen.

"Ok. We do it your way now." I said. "He won't listen- He's going to get himself fucked and doesn't even realize it. I suggest locking him in the panic room."

Dean smirked at me with an "I told you so" expression.

"We can't hold him prisoner forever." Sam sighed. "We gotta get to him somehow."

"Hey we tried, Sammy. We told him the truth, we told him what's gonna happen if he says yes. He doesn't care."

I sat at the table again and finally took interest in the burrito Sam brought me. After taking a few bites I shook my head.

"I don't think we know what we're up against with this one. I have a feeling the angels are gonna get their hands on him and we won't be able to stop it."

* * *

Dean led the way through the grocery store where we were buying supplies for Adam. Sam and Cas were babysitting him, and I gotta say- For once it was nice not being the one being watched.

It was too risky to keep him at Bobbys, since Zachariah had popped in on us once so many months back, so instead they were keeping him stashed on a piece of property that Bobby owned. The only form of lodging on that property was a sort of underground bunker which was more or less, a basement. It was stocked with a small bathroom, kitchen and cot. It was Bobbys former panic room before he built the one in his house. It had the same protection as the second, such as walls encased with iron and salt, devils traps and now added to the lot was angel warding sigils. Needless to say that Adam didn't take being locked away lightly- And he didn't appreciate not knowing where the hell he was.

In order to be certain he didn't see the area, he was either blindfolded and drove there, or Cas would just poof him to the bunker. He hadn't seen the land surrounding, or any landmarks that he might be able to pass along to Zach just in case he tried to come into contact with him. So yeah, he was on extreme lock down, which of course made me feel guilty- But what else were we supposed to do? The dumb-ass wouldn't listen to us, he was insistent on listening to everything the angels said. He wouldn't even take into consideration that they could possibly be lying to him.

I met up with Dean down the desert isle and he was staring at a shelf lined with various assortments of, go figure, pie.

"You do know we're shopping for Adam, and not you... Right?" I asked.

"What? Adam can't have pie?" He turned away from the shelf and sifted through my basket. "So what you got in there?"

"Usual necessities. Toilet paper, plastic plates and cups. Bottled water. What about you?"

He held up his basket with a cheeky grin. And I rolled my eyes at seeing his favorite nudey magazine.

"Yet again I'll ask, you know we're shopping for Adam, right?"

"Hey, the kid's gonna get bored down there with no tv. He's gotta have something to do."

"Gross." I turned away and grabbed a few packages of cookies.

We moved from that isle after Dean lied three different types of pie in his basket. He followed me down the canned food isle and I started throwing random cans of veggies and fruit in with the rest of the supplies.

"So tell me somethin." Dean said. "How did ya get Cas to talk?"

"Huh?" I stopped with a can of crushed tomatoes in my hand. "I asked him, that's how."

"Asked him?" He shrugged. "Just flat out asked him? No guilt trips or nothin?"

"Why do you care?"

"I don't. I'm cool." He smiled.

"Right. Then why did you ask at all?"

He only continued to smile before leaving me behind and heading towards the checkout line.

Weird, that was _weird_. But I shook it off and followed. After we had bought everything Adam would need to live for ten years in the bunker I figured, we drove to the area which was actually a pretty decent sizes plot of land surrounded by thickets of trees. Dean parked near what I could see was a man made trail, and hopped out.

"We gotta walk from here, it's not far though."

It wasn't very pleasant walking through snow banks and patches of ice, but this bunker of Bobbys was so far back into the trees that no one would be able to see it- Which obviously was a good thing. And, with all of us having our ribs carved up there wouldn't be a chance of any angels following us, or being able to find Adam. Still, the questioned remained was exactly how long could we keep Adam locked up like this?

At the end of the trail I could partially make out an iron door encased in concrete walls. There were strategically placed branches and brush lied around it to hide the entrance as much as possible. From the looks of it it seemed to be the remnants of an old tool shed, if a tool shed would be made of concrete that is. Dean approached the door and knocked twice, which resulted in a loud metallic clunk caused from the ring on his right hand. After knocking he pulled the heavy door open and a set of stairs led down into darkness.

He waited for me to go first so he could close the door behind us, and I carefully maneuvered my way down the steep stairs until coming to a poorly lit room.

It was practically as big as a bathroom, and I'm being generous here. There was a small cot pushed to the left hand side beside an electric heater, a rusted metal table with a hot-plate on top, and one of those portable plastic toilets you'd find in a hospital or nursing home. If it wasn't for the flickering light bulb jutting out of the ceiling it would be completely black inside.

Adam was sitting on the cot with his knee pulled up into his chest- Looking just as pissed as he had before, and Sam and Cas were standing near the door when I entered.

Sam quickly took the bags from my hand and lied them aside, and once Dean came into the room I was starting to feel claustrophobic from such a tiny confined space.

"Ok, so you got enough food and water to last a few days-" Dean started. "So you should be good."

"Good?" Adam rolled his eyes. "How is being held in this sweat box good?"

"Hey you know damn well what will get you outa here." Dean raised his arms. "But you won't listen."

"Fuck off." Adam moved his eyes to the opposite end of the room.

"Ok then." Dean nudged me. "Let's get outa here. Sammy, let's roll."

Sam pushed away from the wall and started up the stairs. Dean followed, and then I pulled up the rear, stopping and saying to Cas.

"Gonna be a big change babysitting him for once instead of me, hm?"

Cas didn't look pleased at the turn of events and said nothing in return- I gave a little wave and smile, hoping to cheer him up, and Dean closed the iron door after my exit.


	29. Chapter 29

Just because my third idiot brother happened to show up didn't mean we could skimp on the research. We had one horseman left to track down and snuff out, and he certainly wasn't going to lie down and die without assistance from us. So for the next two days after putting Adam on lock down, we had been searching from morning til night trying to find some kind of evidence that this a-hole was around. Naturally with Death you would expect to see an over abundance of... Well, death. But there hadn't been any natural disasters or anything extreme. Just the same old thing. If this dude was around then he was pretty good at keeping himself hidden.

After three days passed Dean was getting restless, and there was only so much of Adam he could tolerate in one sitting. He went to check on him every other day, to make sure he was still good on food and supplies, but he made it a point to not stay any longer than a few minutes each time. But, as of today he hadn't checked up on him since the night before last. He made do with calling Cas every now and then, but it had been since yesterday that we had heard from him.

I had my nose buried in my i-pad, just as I had every morning, but I was interrupted by a wadded up piece of paper hitting me in the forehead. This was the fifth wad of paper Dean had soared at my face as he sat at Bobbys desk with his feet propped up. After the sixth paper which nearly hit me in the eye I finally got fed up. Quickly I reached for my boot lying beside me and chucked it at him, it smacked against his thigh hard enough that he yelped.

"Dude, what the hell?!" He shrieked. "I throw paper, and you throw a friggin boot?"

"Stop bothering me, I'm trying to search for Death." I paused after saying that, realizing just how odd it sounded. He wadded up another paper and held it up, as I glared at him. "Dean... I'm serious... Don't."

He grinned maliciously and threw it anyhow, it smacked me in the cheek. So I tossed aside my i-pad and jumped to my feet and he almost fell backwards in his chair to try and avoid me.

Instead of punching him like I wanted to do, I entered the kitchen to grab a beer. Sam was at the table with his laptop looking just as defeated as I felt.

I had just opened the fridge when I felt a gust of wind and heard a loud thump. I turned just in time to see Cas sprawled on the floor beaten up and struggling to draw a sigil on the wall with his bloody hand.

"Oh shit." I slammed the fridge door closed and darted for him, as did Sam and Dean.

"Cas, what the hell happened?" Dean asked.

"Adam." He croaked out.

"Adam?" I helped carry him over to the couch. "What did he do?"

As soon as he was lied on the couch his eyes rolled back in his head and he was unconscious.

"Dammit." Dean immediately ran for his jacket and gun. "Sammy, stay here with Cas and Lara. I'll take Bobby with me."

Dean ran outside to where Bobby was making repairs on his car, they spoke for two seconds before Bobby slammed the hood closed and jumped in, then both sped off.

I sat on the edge of the couch and shuddered at how injured Cas was. Yeah, I had seen him hurt before but not to this extent. He looked like he had been in a massive explosion, and it was more than disturbing seeing someone, a frickin angel even, that could be reduced to something so weak and frail.

"Sam..." I said. "There's something up this time, look at him."

He moved closer and pushed his jacket aside. Yeah, there was the usual stab wounds, or some sort of puncture wounds, and the white light was seeping through, but something just felt different. After the time that he had taken an angel blade in the gut for me, I could see that even though he was extremely hurt- The wound had begun to close over minutes after it happened. This time, that didn't seem to be the case.

"I'll get the med-kit." Sam said, rushing from the room.

He returned seconds later and handed it to me. I apologized to Cas in my own mind for whatever pain I was about to cause and first tried to stop the bleeding. I wasn't sure if an angel could bleed to death, but it definitely seemed possible- And had his wounds not have been seeping white light I would have suggested taking him to the hospital. As I washed the blood away I noticed something even more strange- These weren't normal stab or puncture wounds, instead of going inward, they were out, almost as if something had exploded from the inside out. What the hell happened?

"Who or what did that?" Sam asked.

"I have no idea."

Sam helped me in stitching up the wounds, even though we weren't sure if it would do much good. He was covered in them, they ran over and across each arm and leg, his stomach neck and chest, everywhere. His forehead held a deep gash, his bottom lip was split. Seriously, who the fuck had the capability of inflicting that much injury onto an angel?!

I hadn't been this pissed in a long time- I wanted to throttle whoever was responsible for this. Cas had muttered Adams name before passing out, but how could a human do that much damage? If he had I swore I would... No. I wasn't going to stoop to that level.

Two hours later we were still patching him up, and he was still unconscious. After a call from Dean which stated Adam had taken off on foot and they were now trying to track him, it was after dark and Sam was attempting to prepare something for dinner.

Luckily the gash on Cas' head wasn't too deep, so I was going to make do with cleaning it and letting it be. When his eyes suddenly shot open and he reached up and grabbed my wrist I went stiff.

"Hey, calm down. It's just me." I said. He blinked a few times over before his grip loosened. "Stupid question but how are you feeling?"

"I'm amazed I'm still alive." He replied weakly.

"So am I honestly-" I motioned to his hundreds of stitches. "Your wounds weren't healing like they normally do and you were bleeding out all over the couch. Sam and I weren't sure if patching you up would help matters, but we did it anyways."

"Thank you." He tried to sit up but I quickly stopped him.

"No moving around, I don't know what the hell happened to you but you're really messed up." Thankfully he didn't fight against me, but I honestly think he hadn't the strength to. "So, you feel up to telling me what happened?"

His eyes shifted all over the room. "Where's Dean?"

"Looking for Adam, he escaped of course."

He sighed as his head fell back onto the pillow. "I expected as much."

"So, what happened?"

Now he mustered up the strength to sit up. "Zachariah must have given Adam means of escaping. I suspect it was communication through a dream. He used a particular blood sigil, one that is extremely powerful and has the ability of forcing an angel out of its vessel."

I blinked a few times over. "Is that why it looks as though you were in the process of... Exploding?"

"Yes-" He looked away quickly. "Had I not fled when I did then my vessel would have been vaporized, and I would have been killed."

My hands fell into my lap and for a moment and neither of us could seem to make eye contact.

"Are you going to be ok?" I asked.

When I finally managed to peel my eyes away from the floor Cas was staring at me point blank.

"If I was going to die then I would have hours ago." He said.

I nodded and finally took a breath. "Ok, well. If you think you're gonna get up and run around before those wounds are healed then I'm just gonna have to tie you to the couch."

"Kinky." Dean suddenly said, stepping into the room with Bobby following. "Well, that was completely fucking pointless. Adam's long gone. Zachariah must have got em."

"I'm sorry, Dean." Cas said. "I should have suspected this would happen."

Sam joined us in the den and Dean leaned against the desk. Cas went through the torture of explaining what happened to him a second time. Deans reaction was pretty similar to my own once hearing it. Utter disbelief, rage and then finally calming down once realizing he wasn't going to drop dead.

"So is there anyway to find Adam again? Or is he just a lost cause?" I asked.

Everyone of course looked to Cas, and he seemed oblivious that we intended for him to answer that question.

"What about the place they took me a while back." Dean said. "When they were tryin to persuade me into saying yes to Michael."

Cas nodded slightly. "It's a possibility that they took him there. Although, if Zachariah truly does have him now then the chances of him still being your brother aren't likely. He has probably already said yes to Michael by now."

"Wouldn't we have somehow knew that?" I asked. "I mean, if an archangel crams himself into a human you'd think there would be talk of that?"

"Yeah somehow I doubt that." Sam sighed. "They would have to know we'd cause them trouble."

"And since Lucifer's not wearing Sammy just yet-" Dean went on, which caused Sam to frown. "They can't really have their throw down. Spell or not the vessel Lucifer has now isn't strong enough- He wouldn't be able to fight Michael yet."

"So... You think that if Michael has taken Adam then, what... He just went into hiding until his death match with Lucifer?"

Both brothers could only look at each other with a shrug. How were we to know any of this? We were only guessing. But, in my opinion it was safe to say that since Adam had escaped and had completely vanished he had already said yes to Michael, which meant we were completely boned.

* * *

It was only within an hour of being held in what looked like a room from a palace, that Adam realized he had made the biggest mistake of his life. If angels were supposed to be trustworthy then why were they keeping him captive in a room without doors or windows? Why had he been left alone with nothing but a table full of burgers and beer, and no one to discuss what was to happen next? Why did Zachariah tell him to sit down and keep his mouth shut... Something wasn't right.

But he had no way of contacting anyone, he had no way of escaping- He was stuck.

After attempting to smash the wall with every object in the room and each crack miraculously disappearing, he finally gave up and sat at the table. He cracked open a beer and took a few sips before Zachariah appeared.

"Patience is a virtue." He smiled.

"What's going on? I thought you were going to call down Michael?"

"Oh, we are- But not yet. You see, there's been a slight change in plans. We don't exactly want you to be Michaels vessel as much as we wanted to use you as bait."

Adam shook his head and lied his beer aside. "And of course they were right about you..."

"Don't be too upset, think about it this way. You're helping us be rid of a threat, and supplying us with Michaels true vessel." Zachariah sat on the edge of the table, continuing to grin. "Dean can't keep rejecting us, he'll have to accept one way or the other."

"What did you mean you were getting rid of a threat?"

Zach shrugged. "Your sister. We tried to clean up that mess months ago but she escaped, and since then it's been a little difficult to track her down. Since you're here, and she seems to hold a soft spot for her brothers, we're taking a chance that she'll come right along with them to come and get you."

"Lara?" Adam stood. "Why is she a threat? Just leave her alone she's got nothing to do with this!"

"Oh, _now _you care about what happens to her?" He shook his head. "Lara is a... How can I describe it? She's a walking time bomb- One second she's just a normal girl, the next she starts slaying without batting an eye. She's a threat towards our game, in a sense that she could completely take out our biggest players before it even begins. The apocalypse needs to happen, we can't allow anyone to threaten that."

"I'll stop you, I won't let you do this."

"Really? And how are you going to stop it? With a thought you could be back in the ground... You're insignificant and the only reason we brought you back was because you could be useful to our cause. So, what you're going to do is sit down, shut your mouth- Eat a cheese burger, drink a bear. Look at those disgusting pornographic magazines and wait... You still have a chance of getting what you want out of this. If you cooperate I might just bring your Mother back."

Adam cursed slightly under his breath, then shook his head. "No, I'm saying yes to Michael right here and right now. Call him down, he can either take me, or stall around waiting for Dean to say yes- When we all know he would rather die than do it. Your manipulation and false promises might work on some people, but it won't on them." He stopped and looked towards the ceiling. "So, are you hearing this Michael? I'm saying yes. Get your ass down here and take me!"


	30. Chapter 30

**_So a couple people have asked/mentioned whether or not Cas "likes" Lara. And all I can say right now is that for the moment I'm leaving that decision entirely up to the reader. Whether or not it's true, I can't say because I think it would be better to just let the story explain it eventually. Thanks again for the comments, and for all the favs/followers. _**

* * *

Once Cas was well enough to zap us to the location where we expected Adam would be, I stared up at a large storage building. It seemed to be empty, the weeds and overgrowth surrounding had all but completely devoured the entrances and windows. Not only that but it was dead quiet. With Adam being stored somewhere inside you would think the place would be crawling with angels.

"This, uh..." Sam started. "Seems to be a little too quiet, Cas."

Castiel nodded. "I don't believe there's anyone inside. I would be able to sense their presence."

"Great-" Dean stomped towards one of the windows and tore away vines of ivy, peaking inside. "So that means we're too late."

"Might as well double check." I said, moving for the door.

Dean ripped it open and of course we didn't step inside without our guns ready. Not that they would do much good against angels, but it was just the thought.

Just as we suspected the place was completely empty inside, besides the obvious left over smelly evidence from stray animals and birds. Directly in the middle of the massive building was a crudely constructed space, which must have been used as an office back in the day.

Cas pointed towards it. "That's the area where you were held, Dean."

"That?" Dean lowered his gun. "Doesn't look so beautiful now. Was Zachariah playing a jedi mind trick on me?"

Cas didn't answer and instead strode across the room and to the door. He pushed it open and revealed that it was just as big a mess as the rest of the building. But along with the random pieces of garbage and strewn papers, was a few trickles of blood.

Dean knelt over and scraped it with the end of his knife. "It's pretty fresh. Dammit... Adam what the hell did you do?"

"Stupid kid." Sam sighed. "Well, he either tried to fight them off or Michael got him."

"We should have tried harder." I replied glumly. "Instead of just locking him in that room and expecting him to just come to his senses."

"Little hard to talk someone outa something when he's so stubborn." Dean gave me a sympathetic stare. "Ain't your fault, kid."

"Whatever." I turned and left the tiny room behind and returned outside.

Dean could tell me it wasn't my fault, he could say it wasn't his or Sams fault- But Adam was our responsibility. He didn't know what he was getting himself into. He trusted Zachariah and wouldn't listen to us, but we shouldn't have given up so quickly. There had to have been some way to force him to listen to us. To prove to him that angels were just as deadly and dangerous as demons even. Adam definitely got the short end of the stick. The poor guy had not only gotten eaten, seriously how fucked up is that, and died- But was brought back with false pretenses and got royally screwed into being a meat suit for an archangel.

Since it was pretty pointless to linger here at this empty warehouse, Cas zapped us back to Bobbys and Sam went back to searching for our last horseman. My mind was spinning and I couldn't concentrate for the life of me, so I ended up pacing all over the house- Which of course began to annoy Sam and Dean.

There had to be something we could do, or maybe something _I_ could do, to change things. It was so simple to say we would all make it out of this mess unscathed- But realistically speaking, no friggin way. Sure, maybe we had lucked out so far getting three rings, and who knows, maybe the fourth would go over the same. But that was just smooth sailing before the rough and untreadable waters- Which would be Lucifer. Let's be serious here, demons are one thing, horseman are another- But the frickin devil- Yeah, we wouldn't stand a chance.

And I know that thinking positively was what we needed do to, that dwelling on the fact that we would all be turned into mincemeat by that a-hole wasn't doing us any justice- But someone had to think rationally. Ok, we get all the rings and then what? Just politely ask Lucifer to jump back in his cage? No, it was going to require something drastic- After all, I don't think tricking the guy was going to work. Who knows, he might have known what we've been doing this entire time.

By the time my mind partially stopped wandering I was sitting on the banister of Bobbys porch, freezing my butt off trying to think of some way out of this. And just as he always did like clockwork, it didn't take long for Cas to pop up beside me. He was beginning to remind me of a jack in the box- Completely unpredictable and never knowing when he's going to jump out at you.

"Did Dean send you out here to check up on me?" I asked.

He shook his head slightly. "No."

I couldn't help but roll my eyes. Sometimes his one word responses drove me crazy.

"Cas, can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

Sighing deeply, I was momentarily entranced by watching my own breath trail away.

"Do you ever sit and think about what might have happened had you only done _one_ thing differently in the past? Like say, would so and so have died if I had just taken this path, instead of the other?"

I had baffled him already apparently, he did his typical tilt head which reminded me of a confused puppy.

"Generally any road taken would lead to the same results. And dwelling on a particular event from the past that can't be changed serves no purpose."

_And_, a typical response. Why did he always have to think so damned logically? Why couldn't he just humor me for once?

"If I tell you something, will you promise not to tell anyone?" I looked up at him, knowing just how _not _good he happened to be at keeping secrets. So I didn't bother waiting for him to answer. "Sometimes I wonder what might have happened if I hadn't of burned that book."

If it was possible for Cas to looked surprised then he certainly did now.

"Why exactly are you thinking about that?"

I shrugged. "You know that I don't want to be anything else other than what I am right now. That the thought of becoming something else scares the living crap outa me- But, I think I'm starting to realize that maybe I was selfish. Yeah, ok, it's a big frickin deal to just say goodbye to being human and transforming into this literal walking weapon. But, at the same time if I were to do that then I would never have to worry about something happening to you guys."

"And you believe that's a just reason for reversing the spell?"

"I don't know. It would definitely come in handy though, huh? But at the same time I also don't think it's worth taking the risk of changing. I mean, what if it wasn't just the physical side of me that changed? What if I completely transformed mentally? You saw for yourself how that Lee douche bag acted- What I became like that? Cocky and cold and just a complete dick." My eyes met his. "Wouldn't that bother you if I became this cold unfeeling _thing_? Who knows I might not even give a crap about my brothers or _you_."

He went silent, so silent to the point that I waited for the stereotypical orchestra of crickets. I don't know if he just didn't have a response to that, or if maybe he _did _think I was being selfish for burning the book. That awkward tension returned shortly after he lost his voice and the more often this kept happening the more confused I got. It would have been nice to know what the guy was thinking sometimes- Instead of standing there blank staring at me like a deer in caught in headlights.

We were interrupted by the door creaking open and Sam stepping outside.

"Hey, guys- We think we might have somethin." He said.

Cas seemed almost relieved to be finished with our convo, and honestly- So was I. I mean, I couldn't explain what it was that constantly caused such awkwardness, and right at that moment I wasn't wanting to find out. There was too much to worry about right now.

We followed Sam back inside to where his laptop waited, he sat back in front of it and started reading.

"So-" He started. "I was going through all of Bobbys old books since it was pretty much accurate on how to find War. It said that if War was, more or less, taken out- Then Death would begin his rampage, starting with what would be major cities. Now, back when that book was written it wouldn't nearly as bloody as today- But, yeah, anyways- Now all we need to do is figure out which major city he's gonna strike first."

"Yippy-" I said sarcastically. "That should be a shit ton of fun. There's only like, what? A gazillion major cities in this country."

"More or less." Sam snickered. "Anyways, we think we might have narrowed it down to three."

"Chicago, Los Angeles, and Dallas." Dean finished.

"What's made you decide these three are the ones worth checkin out?" Bobby asked.

"Each city has had some sort of natural disaster in the last week. Chicago's been hit with typhoon like storms, tornadoes, the whole works. L.A had 7.0 magnitude earthquake just this morning. Dozens of buildings were practically split down the middle. And, Dallas, out of no where, is having sweltering summer heat to the point that people are having heat strokes, lakes are drying up, everything is turning brown and dying. Which, it being the middle of December..."

"Is pretty damn strange, even if it is Texas." I interrupted.

"Right-" Sam shrugged. "It's all we have so far though. Which means no guarantees."

"But it's a start." Dean said. "So, I guess all we gotta do is check out each city. Yeah, that aught to be simple enough- It's not like they're _major _cities or anything."

"Well, which city has the highest death toll?" I asked. "That might be where to start first."

Sam clicked around before arching both brows. "So far, L.A seems to have the most deaths."

"But that's to be expected from such a big ass earthquake." Dean shook his head. "I don't think L.A is it. Think about it, that damned state is cursed with quakes practically everyday."

"Yeah but how many are of this magnitude?" Sam argued. "We can't dismiss it so quickly, just in case." His eyes darkened some, as he and Dean exchanged glances. "And, uh... There's more."

"Great... What?" Bobby asked.

"We have reason to believe..." Sam stopped, looking to Dean.

"The Croatoan virus... We're pretty sure Pestilence was in on distributing it in the form of a swine flu vaccination."

"Uhh... What?" I stepped forward. "Just how did you come up with that?"

"We've kinda been keeping track of things." Sam answered.

"And you didn't bother to tell me? Dude, what the frick?"

"It was just a theory, we weren't entirely sure, still aren't actually- Like I said, it's just a hunch."

There wasn't much I knew about the Croatoan virus, other than it was created by demons and pretty much turned everyone into crazy zombies that wanted to tare your face off.

"Well, seems as though I've arrived just in time, boys." A voice said from behind us.

Everyone swung around at once, and I myself was not at all pleased to see Crowley standing in the archway that led to Bobbys den.

"You!" Dean jumped up and lunged at him. "You son of a bitch!"

Crowley suddenly vanished and appeared at the opposite side of the room.

"Calm down you oaf- I haven't come here for another go at your precious sister. I'm here to give you a little hand with the last horseman."

"We don't want your help!" Dean took a swipe at him with the magic knife but he yet again vanished, only to appear next in the kitchen.

"I advise we start with a clean slate-" Crowley said. "You forget the things I've done, and I'll forget the things you've done? It's only fair."

"If you don't want to die I suggest fleeing." Cas said.

"What he said." Sam added. "Do you really think we'd want to work with you after what you did?"

Crowley looked genuinely confused- But he was always full of shit, so...

"What did I do?" He asked, his eyes wide. "If anything I did you a favor!"

"A favor?" I shrieked now. "How is torturing the hell out of me and nearly killing me a favor?!"

"Ladies, can we please not dwell on the past?" Crowley smirked. "Now, I came here because I thought you would want to know Deaths location, and to confirm that your suspicions on the Croatoan virus is correct." He shifted his beady little eyes from each person. "You seem to forget that I want Lucifer done away with as badly as the lot of you- So, are we going to be civil here?"

Cas took a step forward and I surprised myself when I grabbed his hand and pulled him to a stop.

"Wait a second." I said. "If anyone was going to decide whether or not this asshole is gonna die, I think it should be me."

"What?" Dean looked like he wanted to smack me. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah, I know. I'm stupid, but if he can help us find Death, and stop this virus from being distributed then I think we should let him."

Crowley smiled. "See, now- This can be beneficial for all of us if you would just stop holding your damn grudges. Shall we talk then?"

Sam and Dean obviously didn't look happy- But it was getting down to the nitty gritty right about now- Which meant we couldn't be picky about who we let help us.

Still, that didn't mean I was going to let what Crowley did to me slide. So, I released Cas' hand and stomped forward, punching him square in the jaw as hard as possible.

"Ow!" His hand flew to his face. "Not in the face, mate- I'm a business man!"

I moved back to the table and sat down. "Ok, so let's talk."

Crowley rubbed his jaw for a moment before regaining his composure. "You were allotted one jab at me, so I'll let that go-" He smirked. "So, to get to the grand climax, Death is in Chicago."

"How do you know that?" Sam asked.

"Don't question me you tree- I don't ask how you gain your intel, you don't ask how I gain mine. Death, the very last horseman, is in Chicago, he's going to wipe out the entire city if you don't stop him."

"And the virus?" Dean prodded.

"There's a warehouse in Atlanta Georgia, the vaccines are going to be shipped out and delivered Saturday afternoon. Which means you buggers don't have much time to stop them. And, since Death is going on a rampage _Saturday_- Seems as though you've got your work cut out for you."

"Lovely." I rubbed my head. "Since we can't exactly be in two places at once."

"Well we could." Sam shrugged. "If we separated."

"Why is that always your plan, Sam?" Dean flopped down in his chair. "Yeah, separating- That's worked out just great so far."

"Shut up-" Sam rolled his eyes. "This time we don't have a choice. We can team up and take Death out, and then the virus gets loose, or we separate and take out both threats at once."

"He's right, Dean." I said. "Yeah, it's gonna be tough but it really is the only way. It's not like we have a ton of friends to call up and ask for help."

Dean pursed his lips, then nodded. "Ok, fine- But this time you're coming with me, Lara. Cause last time Sammy didn't do a very good job at watchin out for you."

Yeah I wanted to say something about yet again, having to be babysat- But let it go for now. And yeah, it made my skin crawl knowing that I was trusting Crowley to help us out with this- But I had to remember that he had helped my brothers with Pestilence. Hopefully this time he would be just as helpful, and wasn't planning on screwing us over somehow.

* * *

Sam looked in on Lara, making certain that she was asleep before he went back to work. Little did anyone know that since finding out what Lara was, and after her burning the book- He had been searching for any type of information on the Seraphim that he could find. Which wasn't much unfortunately. Bobby didn't have any books on the subject, and google only provided mythological stories that couldn't possibly be true. But he still continued on anyhow. Not because he didn't trust her, but because he knew that one day she would look back on burning that book and forever hate herself.

She did it for Dean, he knew that. It was completely obvious. She was so afraid of what he would think of her that she never even contemplated exploring anything about her heritage. He understood her motives, after all, he had kept the demon blood coursing through his veins a secret a long as he could. But this was different. If she decided one day to explore it, then not only would she be granted immortality, but it would be simple to protect herself. She wouldn't have to worry about Lucifer, Crowley, or anyone else ever again. There was no telling what might happen to himself or Dean. And after the other day it proved even more that Cas wasn't superman. He could die just like the rest of them. If they did, what would happen to her then?

He returned to his laptop in the kitchen, after making sure Dean was sleeping. Cas had all but completely healed and was flicking through the pages of one of Bobbys books. He wasn't exactly back to fighting capacity but he wasn't lied up any longer.

Sam clicked open a hidden folder where he kept all his info stashed. It was locked with a specific password that no one could think of, so he didn't have to worry about Lara or Dean breaking into it.

He started where he left off, reading a photograph of an ancient document that had been found in Mesopotamia, which was written somewhere around the time of 539 BC. It was the only written proof that Seraphim had ever existed, besides a few hieroglyphs found etched into ancient Egyptian tomb walls. From what he had translated so far, the Seraphim were greatly feared and respected at the same time. Although known for being kind and cleansing those of their sins with holy fire- They were also known to be very wrathful should God give the commandment. According to the document, the ancient cities of Sodom and Gomorrah had been completely obliterated by their race. The city was the epitome of sin and disgusting acts, and God deemed it despicable enough to warrant the most extreme of punishments.

Sam let out a sigh, this document was no help what so ever when it came to finding a way to break the spell. He would have to somehow find an ancient form of Enochian magic, and that wasn't exactly something you could google search.

Suddenly though he perked up as an idea struck him. No, the chances of it actually being accurate was slim to none, but it wouldn't hurt to at least check it out.

During his research he had come across numerous websites of people claiming to practice the sacred art of "Angel magic". He rolled his eyes at the thought of it, but if there was even a remote possibility it could be legit he had to give it a chance. The first website was a bust, of course, the second was even worse than the first- But the third, whoever the man was seemed to have known a little of something when it came to Enochian.

He had instructions on how to create an Enochian alter, chock full of symbols and sigils that he recognized- Along with that was chants and rituals. After scrolling down to the contact page he found an email address and a phone number. The man lived in California- Which meant it was still semi early.

After grabbing his phone and punching in the number, he checked to see where Cas had wandered off to- Noticing him no longer in the den. Quickly he left his laptop behind and quietly stepped outside and punched dial.

It rang a few times before a man with an English accent answered, Sam put it on speaker and walked a good ten feet away from the house.

"Hi, I'm sorry to be calling so late but I was searching through your website and..."

"Is this another crank call?" The voice quickly replied. "Because I'm getting rather tired of those."

"No, Sir- It's not. I actually just wanted to ask you one quick question regarding Enochian magic." Sams eyes shifted as he heard silence on the other end. "Hello? Sir?"

"What's your question?"

"It actually has something to do with the Seraphim. Do you happen to know anything about them?"

"Other than they're extinct... No."

"So, you wouldn't happen to know of, uh- Any sort of spell or incantation that could reverse a dormancy spell?"

He could hear the man clicking around on his computer keyboard.

"Theologically speaking, should a celestial being place said dormant spell on himself, or another- The only way of breaking it would be to simply repeat the incantation in reverse."

Sams brows furrowed. "Ok, well that's helpful-" He rolled his eyes. "But I need to know the specific spell or chant that would be said. Listen, if you can help me out I'd really appreciate it, I can text you my email address and anything, anything at all, that you can find on that spell would be great."

The man suspiciously agreed and after a few short words Sam hanged up and returned inside.

He sneaked around the corner and stopped abruptly at seeing Cas sitting in front of his laptop with his eyes locked on the screen.

Sam nearly cursed aloud, never even thinking that Cas might take a peak at what he was looking at.

"Sam-" Cas said, his eyes shifting up from the screen. "Can I ask why you are looking at an Enochian alter?"

Sam sat at the table and pulled the laptop back in front of himself. "I'm just researching."

"Researching? What purpose would you have to know about this? If anyone could answer your questions it would be myself." When Sam didn't answer Cas leaned forward. "I heard your conversation outside."

Sam pulled his eyes from the laptop and chuckled. "You spying on me, Cas?"

"No, I only overheard."

"Yeah, well-" Sam sighed. "I'm sure you're wondering why I'm doing this. And... All I can say is that it's for Lara."

"Correct me if I'm mistaken but didn't Lara say she had no desire to reverse the spell?"

"Yeah, she did-" He shrugged. "And I know that someday she'll regret burning that book."

Cas squinted his eyes. "Are you sure that you're not doing this for _you_, Sam?"

"For me? How would this be for me?" Sam sat up straight. "I'm doing this because the only reason why she burned the book is because of Dean. She was so afraid of what he was going to think of her, that she just threw it in the fire without even thinking about it. She's gonna regret it, Cas. I know she will." Cas said nothing and Sam returned to his laptop. "You agree with me- I know you do. Burning that book was the biggest mistake she could ever make."

"Regardless it was her choice."

"Yeah, _her _choice. If you wanna believe that go ahead."

Sam closed his laptop and left the kitchen, deciding to turn in for the night. After all, they had a big day tomorrow.


	31. Chapter 31

_**I wanted to keep the conversation between Death and Dean similar to the one they had in the show cause let's be honest- Death was/is an awesome character and I loved that scene.**_

* * *

This day was going to be hectic- I knew it from the moment my eyes opened and I rolled out of bed. We were going after Death, the final horseman _today_, and it wasn't going to be pretty. From the second I woke up the house, for the most part, was in an uproar- As much as it could be anyways. Sam and Dean were packing everything up, going over every single plan with a fine toothed comb practically making certain we weren't going to fuck up this time.

The one thing we had done, no- The _only _thing we had ever done when finding out where a horseman was, was go charging in without a real strategic plan to anything. Which in turn, always ended up getting us screwed in the end. With Pestilence, Sam and Dean practically died of every disease imaginable, and even Cas was susceptible. With Famine, Sams craving for demon blood went into overdrive and he almost went on a bender. And, yeah War... War, that stupid dick had completely turned Sam and I against Dean and Cas. Not exactly fun times, those horsemen.

And since we were going up against the biggest and baddest of them all today, I could only assume that we were going to get our asses kicked severely if not killed entirely.

It was decided that since I was going with Dean and Crowley to take down Death, Sam, Cas and Bobby were going to Georgia to try and stop the virus.

Cas had healed for the most part, meaning he could zap us back and forth but he was still weak in the sense that he didn't have his angel ninja skills. Dean pretty much concluded that he would be better off going with Sam, since he wouldn't have the go-juice to take on Death.

To say that Cas was pleased with this arrangement was a complete lie. He thought it would be best that he accompanied us. And yeah, I was inclined to agree with him except that I didn't want Sammy on his own in a warehouse that was sure to be full of demons. Bobby had his back, yes, but there's nothing like having an angel fighting along side of you. I just hoped that Crowley was good at something other than being a pompous dick, the dude better have been able to pull his weight.

No one had the chance to relax enough to sit and eat breakfast, so we just inhaled something as we darted around. I was in charge of making certain our weapons were in working order- And helping Bobby make salt rounds for his and Sams trip. My brothers and Cas went over the last few details of our missions with Crowley, and there really wasn't much left to do except... Go...

Apparently Crowley had the ability to zap us to Chicago so we didn't have to worry about driving, and since Cas was going to do the same with Sam and Bobby when they headed to Georgia- It was going to be a quick trip.

I zipped up our duffel bag, and couldn't help but ask myself- Were all these weapons really necessary? I mean, it's not like a gun or a knife could kill Death, and something told me that forcefully removing his ring wouldn't cause the same effect as it had with his brothers. Nah, this is Death we're talking about. How exactly would one kill a dude like that?

"Lara." Cas said from behind me.

I swung around with the duffel bag in hand. It was heavier than expected so I quickly lugged it over my shoulder.

"Hey, what's up?"

"There's something I wanted to give you- To take on your mission." His angel blade suddenly slid out of his sleeve, which he held up in the air.

"Your blade... Why?"

"I have an extra one, from the angels I cut down after Adam was resurrected." His eyes shifted slightly to where Crowley was barking orders to Sam and Dean. "It not only works against angels, but demons as well."

I followed his gaze and watched Crowley swinging his arms and bellowing like a drill sergeant. Afterwards I glanced down to the blade in his hand and nodded.

"Thanks for that then. Should come in handy in case Crowley decides to get feisty again."

He nodded and lied the hilt in my palm. "Be careful."

"You too." I gave half a smile and stuffed the blade inside my jacket before Crowley could see it.

"Lara- Time to go." Dean said, waving me over.

I carried the duffel bag with me and joined Deans side.

"Good luck guys." I said, trying to remain optimistic.

"Yeah-" Sam let out a long sigh. "Guess we'll see you in a few hours."

"Watch your backs out there-" Dean said. "Remember, no matter what- You can't let that virus break loose."

Bobby nodded as he stared at Dean and I. "And you two idgits make damned sure that Death don't get the jump on you."

"Can we please stop with the touching family moment?" Crowley asked. "We're wasting precious time here."

He didn't give Dean or I a chance to say another word before we vanished from Bobbys den.

* * *

When one thinks of Chicago the thing you would expect to see was traffic galore, and crowded sidewalks. But everything was practically dead quiet, which was definitely unsettling.

For the moment it wasn't raining any longer and instead the typhoon like storms it had switched over to thick flakes of snow. It was fluttering down softly yet so thick that you could barely see your own hand in front of your face- And it wouldn't take long for the streets and buildings to be covered. I suppose Death wanted to spice things up a bit, and instead of drowning all these poor bastards he was going to freeze them to death.

I instantly shuttered and tugged my jacket around me tighter. Dean as well tried to shield himself from the frigid winds by turning up his collar. Crowley however didn't seem the slightest bit fazed which actually surprised me. You'd think he'd be accustomed to the sweltering heat of hell fire, and wouldn't adjust well to such a cold climate.

"So, where the hell is he?" Dean asked.

Crowley started walking and we had no choice but to follow.

"Just give me a few ticks- He's around here somewhere." He answered.

Dean and I exchanged annoyed glances.

"You said you knew where he was already before we came here." I said. "Don't try pulling that bullshit with us."

Crowley stopped and tsked at me. "You know it's not lady like to use such language. It's not very becoming for a lovely girl such as yourself."

"Fuck off." Was my reply.

"Look, Death is here- I'm just not entirely certain of the exact spot. Don't get your knickers in a twist and use that patience that humans are blessed with, aye?"

He put up a hand and motioned for us to stay, then vanished.

"I hate that guy, Dean." I said. "Seriously, if there was ever a person I wanted to castrate, then he would be it."

"Well, that sounds unpleasant." Crowley suddenly said, appearing behind us. "Follow me, I think I've got his location locked down."

I practically swallowed my own tongue after he showed up and Dean gave me a wide eyed stare that said "Shut up".

We started down the sidewalk and past the very little pedestrians that were willing to risk getting frost bite. The weather definitely wasn't pleasant and by the time we stopped at the entrance to a pizza place, I was practically frozen solid.

"He's in there." Crowley stated the obvious. Then reached into his jacket and pulled out a scythe like blade that looked ancient. "And, you will probably be needing this."

"Wait a second-" Dean stepped forward. "You're not going in with us?"

"God no- Death is dangerous and he'll squash me like an insect. My part of the deal was just to get you to the bugger- You're in charge of killing him."

Dean held the scythe up in the air. "And... You think this could kill him?"

"Oh absolutely. Was bloody hard to get my hands on too- So you should be thankful." He lied a hand on mine and Deans shoulder, smirking. "Well, good luck. I sincerely hope you aren't instantly melted."

After he disappeared Dean looked at me and shook his head. "We're screwed."

"No shit."

He reached for the door handle and pulled it open. "Might as well get it over with."

It was eerily quiet inside the restaurant, and past a short hallway which led to the dining area, I could see why.

What little customers there were, and the entire staff were lying on the ground dead. It was as if time suddenly just stopped for these poor people. A woman still held an empty pitcher in her hand, a man had a mouthful of salad, another woman was slumped over the bar in the corner.

Dean looked at me and shook his head, obviously he was pissed.

The only table that wasn't swarming with corpses was one next to a set of windows. The man was seated there with his back facing us, his posture was straight- And he didn't seem to be the slightest bit alarmed that we were behind him.

Dean took a few quiet steps closer and I followed. I didn't bother with my gun, because there was no point in it. If anything it might just piss the guy off and he'd off me quicker.

We were within ten feet from him when suddenly the hilt of the scythe Dean held burned red hot and he grunted and dropped it to the floor.

"I appreciate you're returning that." The man suddenly said, and Dean and I looked down to see the weapon had vanished.

"Guess I should have wore mittens." Dean whispered, trying to hide the fact that he was petrified.

"Take a seat, Dean. I think we need to have a little talk." The man continued.

He warily made his way over to the table and sat down across from the man. I followed slowly, stopping a few feet away to stand beside my brother. There was no certainty that Death would be hospitable when it came to my presence, and I really didn't want to tick the guy off. I kept telling my self, no sudden movements, just stand there stiff with my arms planted at my sides and maybe, just maybe, he wouldn't smite me.

He barely passed a glance at me before returning to the deep dish pizza on his plate.

"Word has it-" He said. "That you've been looking for me for quite a while. That you've had success when it comes to taking down my brothers."

Dean swallowed, and it was the first time that I've ever seen him so noticeably shaken. He was usually pretty good at hiding his fears- Unless of course Sammy or I were in some kind of danger. Yeah, it was kind of unnerving seeing Dean act this way, I honestly didn't think there was anything in the world that scared him.

"I suppose this is where you kill us?" Dean nervously replied. "Since we took out your brothers."

His cold eyes moved upwards from his plate, and he didn't look amused.

"If I wanted you dead, then you would be dead-" He said. "As far as my brothers go, well... They were foolish for so blindly following Lucifer."

"And you don't?" Dean quickly realized how flippant that sounded, and tried to rephrase it. "I mean... You aren't working for Lucifer?"

"Not of my own free will- He has me bound to him, which for someone like me is not only humiliating it's degrading. I'm old, Dean- And I'm more powerful than anyone could fathom and here I sit tethered to a crying child who's on a vengeance quest. Why do you think it is that I've allowed you and your sister to live so far? Because if you succeed in putting Lucifer back in his cage then our binds will be severed. He can no longer control me." He held up his hand which held his ring. "You've come for this, correct?"

Dean quickly shifted his eyes to me. "Uh... Yeah."

"I'm inclined to give it to you."

"Just like that?" I asked. "No questions or demands?"

I regretted speaking to him after he looked at me with that cold hard expression.

"The Seraphim were a fascinating species but not invincible-" He took a sip from his drink. "Keep that thought in your mind." He then held up his glass to me. "Now stop standing there like a slack jawed imbecile and go fetch me another beverage."

Deans eyes were practically shouting at me to do what he said. So I reached up and took the glass and headed back behind the bar- Having to step over dead bodies. I refilled his glass and brought it back- Then resumed with leaning against the table beside theirs.

"The only stipulation I have about giving you this-" Death continued. "Is that I have to be assured that you are willing to do whatever it takes to ensure Lucifer goes back in that cage. It's the only way this tether will be broken."

"Done." Dean nodded. "We already planned on that."

"No- You haven't. Because this time, you must be willing to let whomever has to die, die. There will be no changing your mind, no pulling away- Lucifer is not going to go down without a fight, which means one or even all of you could die and I know how you are, Dean- You're willing to let the entire planet rot if it means saving the lives of your siblings. You can't do that this time."

I knew what Dean was thinking after that- He would lie straight to Deaths face if it meant getting that ring. In no way would he sit back and let Sam or I, or anyone for that matter, die just to ensure Satan going back in his cage.

"Ok." He said, and his face didn't flinch. "I'll do it. Whatever it takes."

Deaths face remained cold and stiff. "Do I have your word?"

He nodded. "You have my word."

As soon as Death lied the ring in Deans hand the blizzard outside immediately began to slow down. We weren't sure what to do next, but the man looked up and twitched a thin brow.

"You can go now."

Dean slid out of his chair and didn't hesitate to grab my arm and drag me out of the restaurant. We were both eager to get the hell outa that place and as far away from the horseman as possible.

We were halfway down the street before Dean finally stopped and let out a deep breath.

"That was close." He said.

"I seriously almost pissed my pants." I said. "I don't care if it was only fifteen minutes we were in there with him- It felt like years."

He sat up straight snickered. "Hey, now we can say we stared Death straight in the face. How many people can say that?"

"That's not something to brag about, Dean." I motioned towards the ring he had clenched in his fist. "So. That's it... We got em all."

He stared at the gaudy piece of crap and nodded. "Yeah... All four rings. But, what do ya think Death will do when he realizes I'm not willing to do what he wants?"

"Nothing good. But you gotta know there's probably some truth to what he said, right?"

He shook his head. "No. Hell, we've gotten this far haven't we?"

"Be serious. This is the Devil we're talking about. We're gonna get our asses kicked and you know it."

He locked his eyes on mine and said nothing, only pocketed the ring. Why did I get the feeling we were being set up somehow? I mean, think about it. We got all four of the rings, two were extremely easy. Jeez, Death and War just handed them over like they were nothing. The only reason I could think of as to why they were so compliant was because they both knew that Lucifer was going to beat us.

He must have known we were coming- He knew what we were trying to do and knew there was no way for us to actually succeed so he wasn't threatened. Had he been, he probably would have come and smashed us a long ass time ago. So, yeah... I was right... This was a set up somehow. We were all going to die with this one.


	32. Chapter 32

We were fascinated at watching the four rings slide across the table and fuze together to form a triangular shaped key. Dean had taken them apart and preformed the process practically ten times, and still- We couldn't quite believe it. It was sort of a surreal moment, and hadn't quite sank in as reality just yet. We had all four of the rings, and the spell that needed to be recited to open the cage- The only thing left to figure out was how to actually get Lucifer back _inside_ that cage.

No one had any ideas on that just yet, not that it really mattered- For the moment we had no idea where Lucifer was keeping himself hidden anyways. Things had, yet again, turned unusually quiet and peaceful. At least peaceful in the sense that there weren't any strange deaths, demon omens or apocalyptic signs.

"Are you idgits just gonna sit there and play with those rings?" Bobby said, stepping into the kitchen. "Or are ya actually gonna try searching for Satan?"

Dean allowed the rings to fuze together one last time before picking them up and pocketing them.

"Yeah, we're on it- Was just takin a little break."

"A much needed break." I assured. "We've been running ourselves ragged for the last eight months, I think we're entitled to a little rest time."

"Well you can sleep in after this shindig is over, huh?" Bobby actually gave a small smile. "Hell, maybe I might even take a vacation."

"I can just see it now-" Dean said sarcastically. "You, lounging on the beach with your trucker hat, a beer in one hand, a shot gun in the other."

"That's a picture you don't see on travel brochures." Sam chuckled.

"Well, if we're gonna start in with the researching again- I'm gonna need some lunch." Dean nudged me. "Go get me lunch."

"Why do you always nominate me to do it?"

"Cause you're the only one that remembers the friggin pie."

"There's a simple solution to your beloved pie not being forgotten, you could get off your lazy ass and get it yourself." I smirked.

Sam pushed himself away from the table. "I'll go with you this time, kiddo."

Well goodie, at least I wouldn't be lugging everything back by myself. And Sam could actually drive. I loved Deans car and all but couldn't get used to the feel behind the wheel. Dean handed me a wad of cash and his keys, grinning like an idiot at yet again getting his way, and I followed Sam outside.

After tossing the keys to Sam I climbed in the drivers seat and we started off. And, yeah- I could tell not five minutes out of the drive that something was on Sams mind. He didn't offer to go fetch lunch with me out of the goodness of his heart.

"Well?" I asked, staring him down as he drove.

He passed me a quick glance. "Well what?"

"What's on your mind?"

He smirked slightly. "That obvious, huh?"

"You're very easy to read, Sam. And considering you don't look very happy, and your eyes look all sad puppy- I can only assume it's something I'm not gonna like."

He nodded as his jaw clenched and with a quick jerk of the wheel he pulled over to the side of the road and cut the engine.

"First of all-" He started. "Before I mention this, I need to know that you're not gonna freak out on me... Ok?"

I nodded slightly, but couldn't exactly promise that. He was acting weird, and it was already freaking me out.

"Ok?"

"I've been sitting and trying to think of a way to get Lucifer back in his cage. And let's be logical here, Lara. There is _no logical _way." He shrugged. "He's the devil, he's not stupid. Any trick we might come up with he'd be on to in a second."

"And?" Why the hell did I have a horrible sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach.

He let out one of his well known raspy sighs. "If we're gonna do this... I thought- What if I said yes... I become his vessel, we battle it out inside my head- I gain control, and then I jump in the cage."

The car went silent as we stared at each other. His expression told me he was waiting for a response and the only thing I could do was stare with my heart in my throat.

"Lara..." He somehow chuckled nervously. "Say something."

"Are you a fucking idiot?!" I finally spat. "What the hell is wrong with you!? That's not a plan! That's just you handing your ass over to be Satans puppet!"

"I know it's not exactly something you would think of..."

"NO! You're right, I wouldn't! And do you know why?" He shook his head. "Because it's stupid! That's why. Do you really think Lucifer would just be like, Oh ok yeah sure take control over your mind and body and jump on in. No! It's not possible."

He shifted back in his seat til his eyes were on the road. "Can you please just stay calm and hear me out before you chastise me? Please?"

I took a few deep breaths and tried to slow my speeding heart. I swear, my two idiot brothers would be the friggin death of me!

"Ok, fine. Let's hear your spiel."

Sam frowned slightly. "Try putting yourself in my situation, Lara. Think about how you would feel if you knew you were responsible for _all _of this. Lucifer being let out, the apocalypse, millions of people dying- And you try to tell me that you wouldn't want to do _anything _you could to stop all that. Yeah, I know- It's not the most well thought out plan, but it's the _only _plan, and you know it."

I shook my head. "I don't believe that. There has to be..."

"There isn't." He interrupted. "Everyday I have to sit and think about what I did. The stupid decisions I made that started _all _of this crap. I need to be the one to fix it, Lara. Not you, not Dean, Bobby or Cas. Me... This is on me. It's my responsibility." Tears filled his eyes, which surprised me. "This is my fault, and if it kills me trying to fix it, then so be it. At least I'll know that I did the right thing, and millions of people won't have to die because of me."

My eyes closed and I had to turn away from him. Now wasn't the time for him to see me cry.

"Sam..."

"Look, you don't have to like this plan, and you can hate me all you want for even suggesting it. But I need someone on my side here, Lara. I need someone to stand by me on this decision." He reached over and tapped my shoulder. "Just please say that you're with me on this."

How could I say I was with him on that? Knowing that he was just handing himself over to Lucifer on a silver platter? Knowing that he would be taken over by pure evil, and then if his plan actually worked, he would jump in that pit and roast down in hell with Satan... To think that I would have only known one of my brothers eight months and then he would be gone...

"What if it doesn't work, Sam?" I barely muttered.

"It will... I know I can do it. There's stories of people being possessed and taking back control of their mind."

"But those are demons, not the actual Devil."

"Lara- I need someone on my side because you know that Dean won't be. And like I said, you _know _this is the only way out of this."

I lied my head back against the headrest, staring at the ceiling of the car. No, I didn't like this, not one fucking bit. No I didn't want my brother to have his bones jumped by Lucifer, no I didn't want him to hurl himself into that pit. But I couldn't control what he wanted to do, and in a way Sam was right. I knew that if the roles were reversed and it was myself that had caused all of this I would definitely do whatever I had to do to make it right. Even if it meant my dying it wouldn't matter. Just knowing that it would spare Sam, Dean and Cas from further misery, it would be worth all the pain and torture I would receive.

"Ok." I finally said, and it killed me spitting out the words. "I'll back you on this."

He sighed in relief and gave a small smile. I didn't expect him to jump for joy over such a morbid topic.

"Thanks, kiddo."

"Yeah, well... I'm not the one you need to worry about... Dean is."

And I was definitely right about that. After we picked up lunch and brought it back, ate, and Sam explained to Dean his idea the first thing Dean did after hearing it was throw his beer bottle across the room. Then, of course, he started screaming and cursing.

No there was no way he was going to take this lightly, but the last thing I expected was for him to go so bat shit ballistic.

"You too?" He looked straight at me. "Don't fucking tell me that even _you're _in on this?"

I didn't budge from Sams side, and nodded. "He needs someone to have his back, Dean."

"Wow... Just wow." He started pacing. "Ya know. I've heard some crazy shit, actually did some of it too- But this? Handing yourself over to Lucifer? This takes the cake, Sam."

"I knew you wouldn't like it, but it's the only way."

"Screw that!" He kept pacing, I swore he was going to punch one of us. "It ain't gonna happen, Sam. Just get it outa your head! I won't let you."

"Won't _let _me?" Sams toned darkened. "You're not my keeper, Dean."

"I'm the oldest." He shrugged. "So yeah, that means I am. Especially since the both of you are so stupid."

Cas and Bobby watched the scene in silence. Really, what could either of them say? I already knew what they were thinking anyways.

"Ya know what?" Sam shook his head. "I came to you with this because I thought, since you're my _brother_, that you would be willing to at least listen. But, it doesn't matter what you think- I'm gonna do it whether you like it or not."

Dean froze in front of him. "Oh really?"

"Yeah... Really."

Now they exchanged death stares, and even though Dean was several inches shorter than Sam- They were both equally intimidating. It was almost like watching two gorillas at the zoo fighting over a banana.

"Not if I stop you." Dean finally spoke.

Sam clenched his jaw, his fists tightening. "Just try it."

Oh great... Now they were going to start beating the crap out of each other. Or, maybe not. Almost as though Cas had read Deans thoughts he came at Sam and gave him a sharp shove. Sam immediately thumped to the floor, and he held him there. Then, Dean came at me.

"Don't you dare!" I said, jumping out of the way to avoid him. "Dean, stop it!"

"You left me no choice, Lara!"

He chased me for a moment before I tripped on the carpet in the den and he grabbed me. I kicked and struggled against him but god dammit, the dude was strong when he was pissed. He scooped me up and kept his arms around my waist as he carried me from the room. Cas did the same with Sam, and it didn't matter how huge or strong Sam was- He was no match for an angel.

They forcefully dragged us down the stairs and to Bobbys panic room, and after we were both shoved inside. Sam helped me back to my feet and turned towards the door.

"Dean, don't do this! It won't work!" He shouted.

"You're stayin in there til the both of you cool off and come to your senses." Dean replied, slamming the thick iron door closed.

I rushed to the door and started pounding on it- The tiny window slid open and Cas' peered in at me. I just barely saw Dean already stomping up the stairs with Bobby following.

"Cas. Be reasonable here." I begged. "Locking us in here isn't going to make Sam change his mind and you know it."

"I'm sorry, Lara."

"So, what... You're just going to stand out there and watch us?"

"Yes- Because if I don't then you would find some means of escaping." His eyes shifted to Sam in the background and he repeated. "I'm sorry."

He closed the tiny window and for a moment I tried to resist thumping my head against the door. Afterwards I turned to Sam and sighed.

"So... That went well."

* * *

Dean felt himself shiver, and he couldn't understand why. He had fallen asleep on Bobbys couch sometime after midnight, after drinking until he couldn't see faces any longer. He had a blanket, and the house was usually so warm it was like a frickin sauna, so why in the hell was he shivering so much?

Still with his eyes closed, he rolled over and reached for the blanket, grasping only air in return. Finally, one eye opened and for a moment he thought he might be dreaming.

When he sat up and allowed his eyes to adjust to the dim light, his stomach lurched to his throat.

"What the hell..." He muttered.

Bobbys house was in shambles, the walls were covered in cobwebs and bullet holes. The couch he lied on was so tattered and destroyed he was literally lying on busted springs. The window behind him was broken, and a cold crisp breeze blew inside.

He pulled himself to his feet, trying to understand what was happening. He had to have been dreaming, it was the only explanation- But since when did a dream feel so damned realistic?

"Bobby?" He called out, starting to walk through the first floor of the house. "Sam?"

No answer... It was dead quiet but for the howling winter wind outdoors.

This definitely was not the house had fallen asleep in the night before- Something happened, something horrible. And the more he wandered around alone the more his blood ran cold. Suddenly he remembered that he had locked Lara and Sam down in the panic room, so he flew down the basement stairs, only to have the third one from the bottom shatter from age as he tumbled down the rest of the way.

"Dammit-" He grunted, his face in the floor. "Fix your friggin stairs, Bobby."

After standing and dusting himself off he rushed to the panic door only to find it wide open. Inside was just as destroyed as the rest of the home- The books and other things Bobby had lying on his desk was scattered around the floor, the desk itself was turned over on its side. Every single gun in the weapon rack was missing. And, of course, so were Lara and Sam.

By the looks of it, no one had been in this house in years.

Instinctively he reached for his phone in his pocket and flipped it open.

"No signal... Seriously? What the hell?"

He clicked around on it anyhow, trying to force the bars to magically appear- But naturally it didn't. When was luck ever on his side?

"Cas?" He called out now. "Cas if you can hear me can you flutter your butt on over here? I'm at Bobbys."

Nothing... No flutter of wings, no gusts of wind, no gruff "Hello, Dean." Absolutely nothing.

He left the basement and started searching through debris that was lying on the upstairs floors. After sifting through a pile of busted table parts and dirt he scooped up a crumpled news paper. Immediately his eyes widened when he saw the date.

"January 12th, 2017." The paper fell from his hands. "2017..."

He started taking small circles, and a sudden realization sank in. An angel had to be responsible for this time travel. They were the only ones that could accomplish that- After all, Cas had done it to him not long after meeting him. It was his way of trying to prove that no matter what you did, you couldn't change the past and the way things would play out in the future. So, what was the point of this then? What was the point of shipping him four years into the future?

He had no choice but to go along with this for now, because what else could he do? He had to learn whatever stupid lesson the angels wanted before they'd send him back. So, he went back to searching through Bobbys shredded belongings eventually coming across a picture which edges were torn and faded.

It was a group of men, three of them obviously stood out amongst the rest. Sam, Bobby and Cas. The most shocking thing of the picture was seeing Cas standing there in normal clothes, holding a gun. His eyes scaled the picture a good ten times as he waited for Laras face to become clear, which it never did... She wasn't there.

"Wishful thinking..." He muttered. "But maybe she was the one taking the picture?"

He noticed a sign in the background now, the signs for a "Camp Tecumseh" in Brookston Indiana.

"Awesome- You couldn't have been a little closer, guys?" He tossed the photo aside.

After picking through Bobbys secret cubby space which was on the fireplace mantle, he pulled out a gun and what little ammunition was inside and went for the door. It took a good five tugs to get it open and he was blasted with a cold gust of wind.

Thankfully there was no snow on the ground, but it was littered with patches of ice. He searched for the next thirty minutes trying to find a vehicle in Bobbys yard that would actually run. Finally, he hot-wired an old pick-up and peeled out of the drive.

During his drive he tried searching through radio stations and hearing nothing but static- And, every town or house he passed along the way was nothing but destroyed ruins. Not to mention that there was no sign of life anywhere. No other cars on the roads, nothing- It was as though he was the very last person on earth.

Just his luck the truck ran out of gas right outside of Brookston- So he carried his map and gun along with him as he started walking.

It was freezing, there were small drifts of snow there in Indiana, and it was cloudy- Which meant that even more was coming.

"Why couldn't the angels have shipped me to June, instead of January?" He kicked at a broken tree limb on the road and sent it soaring.

By the time he finally found his way to the long drive that led to the camp grounds he was practically frozen clear through. And after hiking a good one hundred feet up the trail he noticed the entire encampment enclosed with a chain link fence topped with barbed wire.

He tried to stay out of view as he moved closer, he wouldn't want to spook whomever might have been inside, which would result in him getting riddled with bullets.

Past the fence were dozens of tiny cabins, along with several vehicles- And finally he saw some signs of life. There were three men with M-27s patrolling the area, and past them were another two up in a makeshift watchtower.

He slumped down low and scurried across the ground along the fence until finding an area that he could pry open and crawl inside.

Once there he made certain to stay behind the cabins and out of view. And after narrowly dodging more stomping guards he finally caught site of someone he recognized.

It was Cas, and he was leaning against the hood of a jeep with a lit cigarette in his right hand. Dean checked both ways before darting out from behind the cabin and jogging over to him.

"Cas." He said, grabbing him and giving him a hug. "Dude, I don't think I've ever been happier to see you, man."

Cas didn't return the gesture then pulled away confused. "Uh... Dean. I just saw you no less than ten minutes ago? You're drunk again, aren't you?"

Dean furrowed his brows. "What's wrong with you, dude?"

Cas rolled his eyes, taking a long drag of his cigarette. "Nothing? The same as usual I suppose."

Dean eyed him up and down. Cas' slumped posture, his scruffy five 'o' clock shadow, his rumpled and dirt stained clothes... He looked so... Human.

"Didn't you hear me when I called you?" Dean asked.

"When? Just now?" Cas stomped out his cigarette and finally gave him his full attention. "Whoa, wait a second. You're not you... Or, not you from now, what year are you from?"

"Finally-" Dean sighed. "I'm from 2013, I woke up at Bobbys last night."

"Who did this to you? Was it Zachariah?"

"I have no idea. Like I said, I just woke up here- None of your angel pals have came to talk to me... Why didn't you come when I called?"

Cas chuckled, and there was something very maniacal about the way it sounded.

"Uh, Dean. I'm not an angel anymore. I haven't been in nearly three years. That might be why I didn't hear you."

"Not an angel?" Dean took a step back. "How?"

"After the war started I was completely cut off from heaven, and after a while- My powers began to drain, and now-" He held up his arms. "Here I am. Just as pathetic and useless as the rest of you."

"Gee, thanks." Dean shook his head. "Well, where's Sam and Lara? I gotta talk to them."

Cas' smirk faded, and Dean could have swore he turned an even paler shade of white.

"Sam's in his cabin I guess. I'll show you."

"And Lara?"

Cas just started walking while Dean followed. Those he happened to pass only looked at him in confusion, a few men actually pulled Cas aside and demanded an answer which he didn't give. Before long as they started up the stairs to one of the cabins a small group of people had gathered outside to watch.

Cas knocked a few times before pushing the door open, and he stepped inside first- Followed by Dean.

As soon as Dean saw Sam he let out a relieved sigh, that is until Sam actually turned to glare at him.

For the first time in Deans life he actually felt fear caused from his little brother. Sam was definitely Sam, but not the man he knew in the past. His hair was longer and pulled back tightly, his face held a certain harshness that completely masked away the boyish features he had so long ago. He looked gruff and rugged, and there was a gleam to his eyes that could make a grown man piss his pants. To make a long story short, he looked like nothing more than a crazed killer.

"Sammy..." Dean took a step forward. "What the hell?"

"What's going on?" Sam said, stomping across the room and to his cot. "I thought we weren't going on our run for another hour?"

"Sam-" Cas motioned him over and they whispered for a short moment.

Sam then let out an annoyed snort. "Well that's just great. So, _our _Dean is gonna have to deal with _this _Dean from the past? This is fucking perfect- Just what we needed right now." Sam yet again glared at his brother. "So... What's this about, huh? Why are you here?"

"I wish I knew..." Dean let his eyes trail across Sams cabin.

And he wished he hadn't seconds after doing so. There were morbid and disturbing things hanging on Sams walls almost like trophies, what seemed to be mummified body parts and pieces of bloody fabric. Knives and rusted out swords finished the horrifying decor. This was definitely not Deans little brother... Not anymore.

"I guess I'll go get _our _Dean." Cas sighed, leaving the cabin.

Dean could only watch as Sam laced up a pair of combat boots, which his camouflaged pants were tucked into. Even with it being so frigid he wore a black wife beater tank-top, and covering his arms were numerous scars, some of which were clearly old gun-shot wounds. If Dean had to guess, his brother was the spitting image of some gorilla soldier.

"Sammy... What the hell happened here?" He asked.

Sam looked up, cringing. "Stop calling me that. And, to answer your question. The apocalypse happened."

"The apocalypse. Why isn't Lucifer in his cage?"

Now Sam laughed. "Why? Because we didn't put him there, Dean- Obviously."

"Why not?"

Sam stood and stomped across the floor to where his jacket lied, then threw it on.

"Because, Dean. We didn't have a way to do it. Not that we didn't try- Of course we did, but that sort of fucked up and blew up in our faces."

Dean had no words, he was still struggling to understand if this could be reality and not some morbid and twisted dream. To know that the apocalypse happened, the world was basically a steaming pile of crap- And Sam had turned into this cold and unfeeling _thing_- It was almost too much for him to bare.

Footsteps emerged from the doorway and Dean turned to look at, go figure, the future version of himself. Overall he looked basically the same, except for a few more creases around his eyes and a weathered and tired expression. Of course the hate filled stares he shared with Sam were pretty unusual.

"Who sent you here?" His other self said, he didn't even bother to do the usual tests of whether he could be a demon or shape-shifter.

"I don't know." Dean answered, eying himself up and down. "Angels I guess."

"What year did you come from?"

"2013."

His future self stepped forward. "2013? What month?"

Dean wanted to slap himself, it was more than trippy standing there staring directly at your own self.

"December." He finally said. "Why?"

Sam stepped a little closer. "December? When we got the fourth ring?"

"Yeah-" Dean scrunched his brows in confusion. "We had just gotten the ring, and you Cas and Bobby blew up the Croatoan supply shipments." He tried to ignore the way Sam and his future self were eying each other- It was terrifying. "Guys... Where the hell is Lara?"

Sam, if it was possible, turned even more cold and frigid- His future self couldn't make eye contact and Cas... His eyes fell to the floor.

"Cas." Future Dean said. "Why don't you go and see if everyone's ready for the milk run?"

He nodded and seemed happy to oblige to avoid this topic of conversation- Once he was gone Deans future self waved his hand.

"Comon, we're gonna take a little walk."

"Don't fuck this up, Dean." Sam said. "It might be the only way to finally fix this."

Both men seemed confused on who he could have been talking to, but Dean only followed himself out of the cabin and they started walking through the encampment.

"What the hell am I supposed to call you anyways?" Dean asked. "Dean number 2?"

"Cut the crap. Just call me D, that would be easier." D replied.

"Uh... Ok." Dean still felt like he was on a bad acid trip. "So are you gonna tell me what the hell happened to our sister? Or am I gonna have to beat it out of you?"

D stopped and turned to face him. "What do you think happened to her? Do you see her walking around here anywhere?"

Dean felt his stomach twist into knots. "So... She didn't make it? She died?"

"I wish she had died-" D started walking again. "Honestly she'd be better off dead."

"Whoa, dude-" Dean grabbed his future self, which for a moment yet again had him confused. "What the hell are you talkin about? Why would you say something like that?"

"Because it's the truth-" D jerked his arm away. "She didn't die during the war, she was taken by Lucifer. He finally got her. That's why she'd be better off dead."

"Lucifer..." Dean felt the blood drain from his face. "He's still got her?"

"Oh yeah, he's not letting her go anytime soon."

"What... What was the reason why he wanted her in the first place?"

D shook his head, moving his tired eyes away from him and staring off in the distance.

"Think about it, man. Think how powerful a weapon you could have if you crossed human, Seraphim and Archangel blood together." When Dean didn't respond, he nodded. "Yeah, that's right. He wanted to use her to breed a perfect weapon. Which he did... Our little nephew. The spitting image of his Mom, but a hell of a lot more feisty."

Dean took a few steps away, trying to process what he just learned. "But, this kid should be, what, three at the most?"

"Should be, yeah. But he ain't a screaming toddler if that's what you're wondering. I dunno, maybe it's the mixed blood- But within the first year he was the size of a sixteen year old- And now, he's just as big as Sam, but ten thousand times stronger physically, and his powers... It's nothing I've ever seen before."

Dean felt sick, his stomach was rolling as what little contents it held was starting to rise in his throat.

"And Lara?"

"We haven't seen her since he got her-" D sighed and stuffed his hands in his pockets. "But, we've heard things- From demons we've ganked. And, what they're tellin us ain't good. Of course she isn't there of her own free will- She's being held prisoner."

"And you never tried to get her the fuck out of there?!"

His future self shot him a deadly gut piercing stare. "Of course we have! But there isn't a way. We've tried dozens of times, man- And the only thing it's got us is Bobby dead, Ellen, Jo... Everyone, every single one of our friends are fucking dead now."

Dean had to sit down, and the only thing there was a parked car- So he leaned against the hood.

"We shoulda tried harder... How could we just leave her there to be used like that?"

"You wanna blame someone, you, me, are the only ones to blame."

Dean shuddered from a cold blast of wind. "And Sam? What's up with the two of you? Hell, you look like you wanna kill each other... Cas, too. What the fuck is happening?"

"Sam blames me for what happened. Which, he should- It's my fault. Since I didn't let him do what he needed to do to put Lucifer back in his cage, this is what happened." He pointed to the desolate wasteland surrounding. "And Cas... The poor bastard blames himself for what happened to Lara. On most days he's too drunk to walk straight- So I guess you got him on a good day."

Dean ran his hand back and forth through his hair. "You mean to tell me, that all of this happened because we didn't let Sammy say yes?"

"Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy, huh?"

Dean closed his eyes and took his head into his hands, wishing that he would wake up and find himself back in his own time. When a loud siren suddenly started blaring over the speakers on tall light poles- Dean jumped to his feet and noticed that several people were all running towards one of the gates with their guns ready.

"What's goin on?" He asked.

"You got perfect timing." D replied. "You're gonna get to see our bouncing baby nephew in the flesh."

"Wait... What? Why is he here?"

"He comes everyday around this time- Likes to torment us. He can't kill us though. Lucifer won't let him. God only knows why, we'd all be better off dead."

They started in the direction the crowd was running.

"Why hasn't Sam tried to say yes now? You could still end this?" Dean asked.

"He's tried. We've both screamed until we're blue in the face. I've tried saying yes to Michael, Sam's tried with Lucifer. They just aren't interested anymore. After the big show down a few years back between Lucifer and Michael, and the world started going to hell- Us being their vessels just wasn't necessary anymore I guess."

They stopped at the head of the crowd, and past the chain link fence around ten yards away stood a looming figure. Already Dean could see that he was tall and well built, maybe even bigger than Sammy. His hair was the same hue as Laras, but cut short. He was dressed normally in a pair of distressed jeans, a t-shirt and gray jacket. And compared to everyone in the encampment, he was completely spotless.

"That's him?" Dean asked.

"Yeah..."

"Shouldn't we be shooting or something?"

D snickered. "Why waste the ammunition on something that can't die?" Now he sighed. "Wonder who it's gonna be today."

"What?"

D took a step back as the thing in front of him moved closer. "Sometimes he just burns somethin down, sometimes he blows up one of our vehicles- But, if he's particularly bored he'll burn someone from our group to a pile of ashes. Everyone, but me, Sam and Cas is fair game."

The kid seemed to linger in the background for several minutes, pacing back and forth like a caged animal.

"What's his name?"

"Samael... Sam number 2. Lucifers idea of a sick joke I guess."

Cas pushed his way through the crowd to stand beside them, Sam however was no where to be seen.

The closer Samael got to the fence the more the curious bystanders quickly fled. It was understandable considering that he could nuke any one he wanted. When he finally reached the fence, he stopped about a foot away and smiled, his eyes falling onto the two Deans.

"Oh-" He said, his voice was unusually low, it rumbled the pit of Deans stomach. "Look what we have here." His hazel eyes darted across the campsite. "Where's Uncle Sam?"

"Just get on with it." Deans future self said. "Enough games- We all know you're gonna fry something, just do it and get the hell out."

Samael grinned. "In a minute. I kinda wanna know why there are two Uncle Deans?" He stepped closer, moving to stand in front of Cas, and continuing to smile he said. "Mom says hi."

Cas punched the fence in return and Samael didn't even flinch. "Just kill me already and stop with your provoking."

"I can't do that, you know it. You're off limits as far as killing goes- But that doesn't mean I can't tease you. Stop being such a whiney baby." Samael left Cas seething and returned to both Deans. "Did an angel bring you here, Uncle? And if so... Why?"

"Such a precious little tike-" Future Dean said sarcastically. "You just wanna bounce him on your knee."

Samael's eyes sparked gold for a split second as a vehicle parked across the campsite suddenly exploded into a fireball. People started screaming and running, grabbing buckets of water to put out the flames.

"Hey, kid." Dean suddenly said. "Your Dad's a dick."

Future Dean and Cas immediately looked at him like he'd lost his mind. But he wasn't trying to piss the guy off, he was just trying to distract him from killing anyone, or destroying something else. Not that it really mattered, it's not as though he was going to be here in this time forever... At least he hoped not.

"Don't talk about my Dad that way." Samael said.

"Oh, ok- I'm sorry." Dean smiled. "He's _the _dick. The dick of all dicks."

Samael ignored that, and looked back towards Cas and the other Dean. "So, I came here to bring you a message. Dad agreed to let you see Mom, for a few minutes anyways. But, of course there's conditions. No weapons. No horsemans rings, no holy oil... Nothing but you and the clothes on your backs. Is that agreeable?"

Cas' arms fell to his sides. "Why? Why now? We've been asking to see her for years and always he's said no."

"I guess Dad wants to prove a point to Uncle Dean... Or, the one from the past. He knows he's here and wants to talk to him."

"Ok, when?" Future Dean asked.

"Tomorrow morning, no later than 9 a.m. If you're even one minute late, the meeting is off and you'll have lost your chance."

"We'll be there." Dean said. "With bells on."

Samael nodded, giving a sarcastic wink to Cas. "Have fun tomorrow."

With a gust of wind and flutter of wings he was gone.


	33. Chapter 33

"You couldn't have possibly agreed to this?" Sam asked, watching both Deans flutter around the cabin. "No weapons? Are you nuts?"

Cas stood crossed armed in the corner, looking broken and miserable. "That was Lucifers terms. No weapons of any kind, or else we can't get in."

"Yeah, we're just setting ourselves up to be killed. You guys know that right?" Sams eyes darted from man to man. "This is stupid."

"It's the only way to get in, Sam." D said. "If we stand any chance at even getting close enough to grab her, this is it."

"Ok, and then what? After we grab her how the hell are we supposed to get back out with no weapons?"

D stood up straight and adjusted his jacket collar. "Easy. I'm gonna sacrifice myself and hold em off, while you run for it."

Dean waited for Sam to object to that, to put up some kind of fight but he didn't. In fact, Sam seemed ready to just allow his future self to run straight into the line of fire.

"One man can't hold off a hoard of demons _and _Lucifer, Dean." Sam replied. "You know the only way outa this is if _this _Dean goes back to his own time and fixes this shit."

"Yeah, and what if he's not gonna go back? What if he's stuck here, huh? What then?!" D tried to keep his voice down. "Lara can't be stuck with that sick s.o.b anymore, Sam. She's gotta get out of there, even if it means all of us dying, including her. She'd be better off."

Sam rolled his eyes, slicking back a tendril of hair that fell loose from his ponytail.

"Yeah, I get it now- You go and get yourself killed, so you don't have to live with the guilt anymore. I get it. Meanwhile, the rest of us. Lara, Cas, me... Still has to suffer."

Dean watched the exchange between them and even more so wished he would wake up already. He halfway expected the two of them to pull their guns and start firing at each other. It was clear that Sam and his future self loathed one another.

"You think that's what it is?" D retorted. "Well, you couldn't be more wrong, Sam- I'm just trying to help her, which is what we should have done years ago."

"Guys." Dean said, waving his arms. "Look, we aren't gonna accomplish anything by fighting here. Let's just head on out- We have an hour, we can't be late."

Everyone set their differences aside for the moment as they left the cabin and Sam led the way to an armored up range rover. He climbed in the drivers seat, and Dean and Cas sat in the back. Once his future self got in the passenger seat Sam fired up the engine and they pulled up to the gate entrance, where two men quickly pulled it open for them.

As they drove, Dean shifted in his seat and looked to Cas. "Don't tell me you're for this plan, dude?"

Cas' face for the moment had returned to blank and emotionless. "Of course I am. It might be the only chance we get."

"But you gotta know Lucifer won't let us get her outa there?"

"I don't care."

Dean shook his head, returning his attention to the scenery whizzing past. What in the hell happened to everyone? No one cared whether or not they lived or died, no one wanted to try to save anyone... Sam going all Rambo, or Steven Seagal, his future self so ignorant by not putting any thought into this supposed mission, Cas... Seemingly lost in every way possible...Everything had truly gone to hell.

* * *

Sam pulled the SUV into the long drive of what was a large mansion. The contrast between this property and the rest of the world was staggering. The lawn was well maintained, the house itself hadn't been vandalized in the slightest- It was still intact and clean.

"This is where Lucifer has been hiding out?" Dean asked.

"Yep-" Sam answered. "I heard it's the house of the former college basketball coach around this area. Long story short, Coach got possessed, and Lucifer took over the house."

When they parked out front a group of five men stepped out. Dean knew that of course they were all demons.

"Expect the worst." D said. "There's no way of knowin just what kind of shape Lara is in..." He turned in his seat, looking to the former angel. "Cas, keep a level head in there."

"I know." He bitterly replied.

They climbed out of the car and were immediately patted down from head to toe for any concealed weapons. Once they were deemed clean enough, one particular demon stepped forward to lead them inside.

Dean didn't say a word but definitely was taking heed of his future selves advice, he was going to expect the worst when it came to seeing Laras outcome. He had no doubts that she would be locked in a cage, or chained to a wall, or something just as horrible. It was Lucifer after all.

The demon led them up a set of stairs and down an elegantly decorated hallway, stopping at the first door on the right. He knocked twice before a male voice called to enter.

After opening the door, the demon walked away and they each stepped inside.

Immediately Dean felt his feet skid to a stop, he couldn't believe what he was looking at.

Lara looked... Fine... In fact, she looked so well you never would have believed that Lucifer was the one that had been holding her hostage. She was dressed in a knee length skirt, a nice blouse, and her hair was styled. Dean could have even swore she was wearing makeup. And, after looking to Sam, Cas and, well... _Himself_- They too seemed equally surprised.

She turned from the window she stood at and let out a sigh. Lucifer was seated on a leather armchair in front of the bedrooms fireplace.

"You can leave now." She said. "I told you I wanted to be able to talk to them alone."

Lucifer smirked and stood from the chair, adjusting his suit jacket. He was obviously pleased with the situation and shook his head.

"You know how it is-" He said. "Should always listen to the Mrs."

He started for the door but Lara took a few steps away from the window. "And I know how you like to eavesdrop, Lucifer. So I expect for you to honor my request and give me my privacy."

"Of course, dear." He winked, closing the door behind him.

Sam took a step forward and started to speak but Lara held her finger up in the air silencing him. After kicking off her stilettos she stomped to the door and pulled it open. Naturally Lucifer was lingering in the hall.

"I said go away!" She then slammed the door in his face.

She waited until she heard the flutter of his wings before letting out a sigh and crossing her arms.

"Two Deans... Guess the rumors are true." She said. "So, why are you here in this time, Dean?"

No one knew what to do, or what to say. Something was clearly very wrong with this picture and neither man could put their finger on what it was. Finally Dean broke the awkward silence.

"What the hell, Lara- Since when does Lucifer take orders from you?"

She moved to the armchair and sat down. "You'd be surprised how compliant and tolerant Lucifer could be when you bare him an abomination. Trust me, he definitely doesn't wear the pants in this house." Her expression softened some. "It's good to see you guys. I'm glad you're all ok."

"Lara..." Sams shoulders slumped. "We're here to take you with us. You don't have to stay here anymore. We have a plan."

"No you don't." She shook her head. "I'm not going anywhere. You don't get it do you? I'm not here because I want to be, I'm here because I _have _to be. How is it that you're still alive after all these years of Lucifer being on his rampage? Because I told him that if any one of you were harmed then I wouldn't cooperate with him. I made a deal with him. I told him if he leaves you alone- Then I won't fight against him. I'll give him what he wants. Now, what you're going to do is turn around, walk out of this house and don't come back. Because while I do have _some_ control, there's no telling what he'll do if you piss him off."

"Kid..." Deans mind couldn't process what was happening. "This isn't you."

"It is now, Dean. Because that's what happens when the devil takes control. No, it's not what I wanted, but as long as I know that everyone I care about is safe, then I'm not going to complain. After all, someone's gotta take one for the team. And I guess I'm it."

Cas took a step forward. "Lara, if we can get you out of here..."

"No, Cas-" She finally looked up at him. "The only thing that would do would ensure all of you being killed. And that's the last thing I want." Now she stood. "Look, I know that this isn't the best of situations, but if I leave here- Then Lucifers wrath will be massive- Everyone at your encampment will be slaughtered, everyone even in the _vicinity _will be vaporized. Just please listen to me on this, and go."

Deans future self had remained unusually quiet, until now. "What reason does Lucifer have to want a hybrid freak job for a kid? The planet is toasted, there's barely anyone left alive. What's the point of having a living weapon like Samael?"

"It's not just about obliterating the world, Dean. He wants his own little army to start doing damage in heaven. He's the only archangel left. Gabriel, Raphael and Michael are dead- Which means there isn't anyone left to stop him. So, he wants to start picking off the angels that are left and then eventually go after god himself. And, he knows that he's going to need something a hell of a lot more powerful than him to get the job done- Which is where Samael comes into the picture."

Everyone looked to Cas, who stood stoned faced with his eyes fixed on the floor.

"Cas, is that even possible? Would Samael really be able to kill God?" Sam asked.

Cas wouldn't pull his eyes from the floor as he spoke. "Yes, I believe he could accomplish that."

"And after God's dead? What then?" Dean asked.

"Lucifer becomes the _new _god." Lara answered. "He wants to start a new world- One where he'll smite those who oppose him. The thing with him is, is that he doesn't actually want the planet destroyed, he wants it to flourish, but only with people that will serve under him. Which means, if I'm not here to hold the leash on him, you all would be his first targets." She looked to Dean and let her eyes harden. "Can I talk to past you, alone?"

Still, everyone didn't quite know what to do. This clearly wasn't their Lara. She had changed far too drastically to ever be considered the sister or friend they knew in the past. She was cold, she was bitter- But, could they really blame her?

She watched everyone leave the room, all but Dean who stood in front of her looking just as broken and defeated as poor Cas. Once the door was closed she let out a sigh and shook her head.

"So, what's the lesson to be learned here?" She asked. "The angels wouldn't have brought you to this time just for kicks."

He didn't answer that and instead said. "I'm so sorry, Lara. For everything..."

"It's a little late for apologizes, Dean. Ya know, for a while I blamed you for all of this. Because you kept Sammy from saying yes, and all of this hell happened. But, now... I guess I can't _really _blame you for choosing one sibling over the other. Honestly, I don't know what I would have done in your place. Yeah, on one hand you'd lose Sam- But then on the other- The entire world goes to pot, your friends die, and I'm stuck here with Lucifer." She furrowed her brows. "Such a _tough _choice."

He could feel the sarcasm and anger burrowing into his very soul. Of course she blamed him, how could she not?

Dean could do nothing but utter another quiet apology. "I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing, Dean. Those words hold no meaning. I just want you to know that your crass decisions bring forth tremendous repercussions. I dunno if you're gonna be sent back to 2013 or not, and even if you are I know it won't make much of a difference. You're still gonna do what you want, no matter what the cost..." She clenched her jaw. "So, if you are sent back. I would appreciate a heads up for what I'm gonna be getting myself into in the future. Trust me, being surprised like I was wasn't exactly fun times. And, give Cas a message from me, would you? Tell him that I forgive him. He'll know what it pertains to."

He nodded slightly, wondering what Cas could have possibly done to need forgiveness, but of course he didn't ask.

"Can I just say something before you throw me out?" He asked, and she nodded. "I know I've done some stupid things in the past, a lot of choices I made come back to bite me in the ass, a lot of good people have died because of me. But, I just want ya to know that I'm gonna try my best to make sure all of this-" He motioned to her, the house and whatever might have been around. "Doesn't happen. I give you my word."

Her face was blank, her eyes dull and sullen. "Don't make promises you can't keep, Dean. I think you should go now."

He had no choice but to leave, honestly- Standing in her presence was chilling him more than Lucifer. So, he made himself down the long hallway and stairs, finding everyone still waiting for him outside. And, after one last glance to what the world had become, Sams serial killer vibes, Cas' broken and battered personality, and his future self being so cold and emotionless- Suddenly everything began to fade in a rush of white light, and his eyes shot open to find himself lying on Bobbys couch once more, only now it was back where he was supposed to be.


	34. Chapter 34

_**So for the record in order to get myself emotionally traumatized enough to write this chapter it required having to listen to the most depressing music ever created, which is the sad piano music from the show Lost. Seriously, that song just kills me.**_

* * *

No one would ever expect to hear something so horrible. It just wasn't even conceivable to me, I mean, really... How could someone actually be so sadistic and cruel?

Everyone was silent around Bobbys kitchen table, Sam and I couldn't even pull our eyes away from the floor. My heart was in my stomach, which itself was churning to the point of vomiting. I could feel Bobby and Cas' eyes burning onto me- I wasn't certain if it was pity or just plain horror caused from what Dean had just told us.

"So..." Sam finally broke the silence. "That's why Lucifer wants her? It wasn't just to use her dormant powers somehow..."

"No." Dean shook his head. "The sick bastard thought it was better to breed some hybrid monster."

"And you witnessed this creature first hand?" Cas asked, his tone was definitely lower and numb.

"Oh yeah-" Dean took a swig of beer. "And trust me, he wasn't somethin you'd wanna run into in a dark alley."

I wanted to puke... No. Actually, what I wanted to do was run screaming from the house like a lunatic, but that wouldn't exactly do me any justice right now. Hiding under the table sounded good, just so everyone would stop looking at me. What Dean said hadn't even happened yet, and still I felt so ashamed.

"How did this happen?" I asked, finally. "How did it all come down to that?"

When I finally peeled my eyes off my boots and looked to Dean, I couldn't exactly describe the expression he held.

"Because Lucifer was never put back in his cage, obviously. Sammy never said yes, we had no other plan... You were taken and basically sold your soul just to keep us safe." He let out a deep breath than looked to Cas. "You told me somethin before I was sent back here. You told me to tell you that you forgive him... Forgive him for what?"

Cas scrunched his brows and looked at me, and I was equally confused. "Uh... I have no idea? Whatever it is it obviously hasn't happened yet."

"You said he'd know what it was about... Cas? What's it about?"

"I honestly have no answer to that, Dean." Cas said. "I have no intentions of wronging Lara somehow."

"That's kind of irrelevant, guys." Sam interrupted. "How the hell are we gonna avoid this?"

"About that-" Dean pursed his lips. "I already know how to avoid it... You're gonna say yes to Lucifer."

Sam and I quickly looked at each other, his mouth was agape and eyes slightly wide.

"You're gonna let me say yes?" He asked.

"It ain't about that. Lara said something to me before I came back here- She said that I chose you over her, and that's not what it is. My thoughts were how I could keep _both _of you safe. I mean, what kind of brother would I be if I singled out a sibling, huh?" He shook his head. "You're a grown man, you can make your own choices- I can't tell you what to do anymore, no matter how much I don't like it. So, if you feel this is what you gotta do, then I'll back you on it."

I was speechless, and apparently so was Sam. Yeah, it was his only plan, _our _only plan, but never in a million years did we think Dean would EVER let him do it. Whatever he saw in the future, whatever became of us and the entire world, must have really made an impact.

Even though in no way what so ever I wanted Sam to do this, like Dean said- It was his choice to make. So... I guess this meant that now we needed to track down the devil and end this once and for all.

* * *

Dean slammed his palms down on the table, cursing loudly.

"You're cheating... Again!" He shouted.

I only smiled, pulling in the few bucks I just won in another game of poker. It's funny how playing poker seemed to become our only normal bonding experience. Oh, of course there was hunting- But it wasn't exactly something you could consider quality time. After all, we were usually running for our lives, trying not to get eaten or torn apart by some monster.

Sam inspected the pile of change in front of him, along with a few folded bills, then moved his eyes to Deans.

"Wow... You suck." He snickered.

"Screw the both of you." Dean pouted. "Next hand, winner buys the burgers and pie."

"Fine by me." I sat back and waited for Cas to deal.

It was the night before the bloody battle. Dean was certain he knew where to find Lucifer- And he said that Brookston Indiana was the place. Bobby had been searching for a week for some kind of sign, and there were a few temperature fluctuations there that seemed a little shady. It wasn't nearly as bad as the earthquake in California, the flood in New Orleans, or the three hundred mile forest fire in Colorado- But Dean was insistent Indiana was definitely the place where Lucifer would be. We didn't ask him why, but the answer to that was pretty obvious. That must have been where we were when he was shipped to the future.

And, after Cas made a quick trip to the location and found several places in town that was crawling with demons, well- That pretty much just sealed the deal.

Since we knew where we were going, and were pretty sure we were all going to die the next day, each of us vowed that tonight, our last night- Was going to be lighthearted and no discussion of Satan, demons or butt-hole angels... Nothing at all but poker, beer, and making fun.

Which is what we did, and it was the first time that I had ever felt semi normal. Of course there was always the lingering anxiety in the back of my mind of knowing what was going to come tomorrow- But I tried to push that away.

After nearly a dozen games of poker we finally called it quits and decided to turn in. The fun was over, and now reality needed to sink back in. When morning came, yet again, it was a surreal moment- Just as the day we sat around the table and stared at the four rings. There was a sense of accomplishment, but also dread at the same time. Sammy was going up against the Devil- And even though I knew my brother was strong and could do whatever he set his mind to, I would be lying if I said I had full confidence this time around. But, I kept a straight face, I encouraged him over and over.

Dean and I were packing our things, guns and salt, holy oil the whole lot- And as I looked up at him suddenly I smirked.

"Do you know what I just realized?" I asked.

"What's that?"

"We completely forgot about that bet we made."

He looked at me, confused. "What bet?"

"Ya know- The one we made so many months ago. You didn't think I could get a hit on you..."

"Ahhh." He grinned. "Yeah, guess that kinda got pushed aside, huh? Ok, well- After all this shit's done it's on again, cupcake. Be ready to shave off those eyebrows."

"Right-" I jabbed him with my elbow. "I've got a nice dress and pair of heels lined up for you."

He shrugged. "Well, even if I lose- You gotta admit I'll make one hell of a hot chick."

I thought about that for a moment before shuddering. "I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit."

We went silent for a moment before Dean started loading his shotgun with salt rounds.

"So-" He said. "Ya know I've never said this before, but- I'm glad you stuck around."

I froze and stared up at him. "Not-uh. None of this last word crap, Dean. You want to get all mushy on me then wait until after Satan is back in the box, ok?"

He gave half a smile. "Fair enough."

Yet again we went silent as the sudden realization sank in that with Satan going back in his cage, Sam would be in there with him.

"Dean." Cas said from behind us. "I need to speak with you."

He lied his shotgun down and gave him his attention. "Ok? What's up?"

Cas shifted his eyes to me and then sighed. "You do realize that in order for this plan to succeed that it would require Sam having to drink more demon blood than he's ever consumed?"

Dean went noticeably stiff. "What? You're friggin kidding me, right?"

"I'm afraid not. In order for him to be strong enough to contain Lucifer..."

"Does he know about this?" I interrupted.

Cas nodded. "I spoke with Sam- He wasn't pleased with it of course, but he is willing to overlook the discomfort."

"Awesome-" Dean crossed his arms. "So I guess this means we gotta hunt down a few hell bitches before going to Lucifer."

"That should be relatively simple-" Cas went on. "Since the area where Lucifer is hiding is crawling with them."

Dean tried his best to hide his disgust, which he did quite poorly. The creases around his eyes deepened as his mouth contorted into an obvious frown. He looked about ready to put his fist through a wall. All of the time he spent trying to get Sammy to kick his demon blood habit, and now he was going to jump back into it full force. Even though I didn't know Sam at the time he was hocked up on demon gogo juice, I knew that it completely messed with his head- Which in turn caused him to make the mistake of breaking the last seal. And when Dean tried to get him to quit cold turkey it nearly killed him. I didn't want to think of Sammy being any different than he was right now- Although, being possessed by the Devil might change him just a tad.

God this was an incredibly fucked up plan.

Dean left the kitchen a short time later to go over the drill with Sam- Which left Cas and I alone.

"Lara- There's something that I feel I need to tell you." He said. "There's something that I've kept to myself for several months now, and I realize that it was wrong of me. I believe that it could be what you had referred to in the future- The reason why I needed forgiveness."

I stopped fiddling with the guns and arched a brow. "Really? What would that be?"

He shifted his eyes to the den, where Sam and Dean stood.

"The night you sent me to return the book to the safe deposit box, I glanced through the pages a second time... I memorized it."

I went stiff. "What? You memorized it? How much?"

"All of it."

I quickly grabbed his coat sleeve and yanked him with me out the door and pulled him until we were a good twenty feet from the house.

"You're kidding me right? The entire thing? You memorized it?" He nodded in answer. "So that means you know how to reverse the spell?"

"Of course."

Now I started to pace, my palms were sweaty- My heart was racing. This was it... This was the exact answer to all of our problems. Why allow Sam to kill himself to put Lucifer back in his cage if I could just...

"What's required in actually reversing the spell?" I asked now. "Do you just recite the incantation, or what?"

"Unfortunately no. It's far more difficult and time consuming. Sauriel stated that the after affects of the spell being removed would be painful and uncomfortable, and would require days of recuperation for a body to heal from it."

"Fuck." I pushed my hair from my face. "Ok... But, hypothetically speaking- Should you reverse it, it wouldn't kill me right?"

"No- It wouldn't kill you, but you would be severely weakened."

"But, not dead. Ok, that's good... And, exactly how long does it take to recite the incantation?"

"It's a very complex and ancient form of Enochian, but since I have it memorized it should be relatively quick. But, it's not as simple as that, Lara- Sauriel claimed that once the incantation has been spoken, and the spell reversed, then it would send a strong vibration that every angel in creation would feel. Which would mean Zachariah, Michael and Raphael- _Everyone _would be coming for you."

Yet again I started pacing, not even noticing that it was freezing outside and I wasn't wearing my jacket.

"Alright. So, say we get there, to where ever Lucifer is hiding out. We wait til the last second for you to say incantation... Would that work?"

He thought for a moment, not seeming very pleased with my spur of the moment plan.

"It's a possibility, but you fail to remember that you will be weakened to the point of being bed ridden. Therefore, powers are irrelevant because you wouldn't be able to use them against Lucifer."

"I don't fucking care if you have to carry me over your shoulder or drag my half dead body behind you, if this can work then I want to do it! It has to work, Cas- It has to. We can't let Sam jump in that pit." I paused and let out a deep breath. "We have to at least try. Worst case scenario is Lucifer runs away before I could smite him, but even if that happens- Sam still won't have to say yes because we could just track him down and I could take him out."

"_If _you could even master these powers, Lara- It could take years, decades. It isn't as simple as pulling the trigger on a firearm."

Freezing in front of him, I allowed my eyes to seer into his. This wasn't some petty request that I thought I could receive easily. My sad puppy eyes weren't going to work this time around.

"Please, Cas... He's my brother- I can't let him die... If I can stop this somehow, I at least have to try." When I grabbed his hand for a moment he didn't seem to know what to do. Yeah, I freaked him out, but I didn't care. "Can we please just try?"

He stared down at my hand, his face completely blank, just as it always was. Yeah, it was a stupid and risky thing to ask of him- But if there was even a .01 chance of it working, then I was willing to do whatever it took. Even if it killed me, I didn't care... Not anymore.

"I take it- That you _don't _want Sam or Dean to know about this plan?" He asked.

"It would be best if only you and I knew about it. They would only try to stop me."

"And if it somehow fails to work?"

"Then it's on me. Not you."

I could tell that in no way what so ever he wanted to agree to this. His eyes said it all, he thought it was stupid- He thought it was dangerous, and it probably went against everything he might have stood for. Still, I'm not sure why he actually agreed to it.

"We can try-" He said, finally pulling his eyes away from my hand. "But I can't guarantee the outcome."

Let me repeat for the upteempth time that I am not the type of chick that gets emotional over anything- So needless to say I surprised even myself when I gave him a hug tight enough to snap his spine I'm sure. Which I think terrified the poor guy.

"Jeez, get a room." Dean suddenly said. "Cas, stop coppin a cheap feel from my sister."

I pulled away and rolled my eyes. "Always... Always with that crap, Dean- Seriously?"

Cas looked traumatized. "Dean I didn't..."

"Yeah, I know-" Dean snickered. "Dude, you really need to brush up on your humor... Anyways, we ready to head out?"

"In a minute." I quickly said.

He looked at us suspiciously and god only knows what the hell was going through his mind right then. Nah, I knew- It was something dirty, because let's face it- That's Dean. Thankfully he didn't make another comment and went back inside.

"You have to tell Sam that you were mistaken about the demon blood thing, Cas- If he goes all vampy and drinks that much blood, he'll never recover. Plus, he doesn't need to since I'm gonna step in on this."

"How?" He squinted at me. "How am I supposed to tell him that I was wrong?"

"I don't know. Think of something, comon you're not stupid, man. Just tell him anything."

He let out a sigh and returned to the house and I followed. Once he was there he pulled Sam and Dean aside while I nonchalantly tried to eavesdrop. I couldn't hear whatever it was Cas told them but it obviously worked. Dean grinned and smacked Sam on the arm.

"There ya go, Sammy." He said.

Sam looked skeptical, and I couldn't exactly blame him since not an hour ago Cas told him that the only way for this to work was if he drank a shit ton of demon blood.

I inched closer, trying to look as though I was only examining our duffel bag of weapons.

"Are you sure about that, Cas?" Sam asked. "A few words of Enochian would be enough?"

"It would be the same spell Lucifer used on the vessel he has now to solidify it. So, yes, theoretically speaking it should work."

"But it's not definite?"

"Comon, Sam- Don't knock it yet-" Dean insisted. "It's worth it to try isn't it?"

Sam sighed and put his hands in his pockets. "Yeah... I guess."

"Ok, then. So, do whatever you gotta do, Cas." Dean left the den and passed me into the kitchen.

I followed after him and watched as he pulled a beer from the fridge.

"You ok, Dean?" I asked.

He yanked the cap off his beer and tossed it to the counter. "No. I'm far from ok- But, I can't let Sammy know that. Truth is... I feel like running my fist through a wall, but I can't- Cause breakin down isn't gonna help him any."

"I know the feeling." I tried giving a small smile. "Dean... Don't lose hope yet- You never know, maybe things will work out for all of us. Even Sam."

Of course I couldn't tell him that I knew it would work out- Because once he learned what I planned on doing then he would try to stop me. But, what would be worse, huh? Sam in a cage with Lucifer? Or their sister that they've only known for eight months changing into a Seraphim? Really I think door number 2 was definitely the better choice.

Once everything was settled and packed up, Bobby joined us and Cas zapped us to Brookston Indiana. Cas fake preformed some sort of Enochian chant, and afterwards I asked him what he really said- And basically the words translated to- "I'm sorry I'm lying to you right now, this is not an Enochian spell."

As Sam and Dean led the way down the sidewalk towards an old apartment building where Lucifer was supposed to be held up- Cas and I went over our hasty and not so well thought out plan.

We were going to be cutting it pretty close- What with having to recite the incantation, reversing the spell, and then hopefully myself not being knocked completely unconscious all before Sam could utter that dreaded three letter word, yes. I wasn't sure what was going to happen after the spell was gone- If my mind would suddenly just completely change, if I would explode, or if it would be something simple as passing out then waking up and being something else. Yeah, of course it wouldn't be that easy- Cas said it was going to be painful and weaken me- But as long as I could hold my eyes open and at the very least, scare Lucifer away- Then that's all I cared about.

Sure I felt guilty for not sharing this with my brothers, but it was the safest and sure fire way of sparing Sam from having to say yes- And whether Dean would admit it or not, I knew that when it came down to choosing between us- Sam would always be the one he turned to. Nah, it didn't exactly bother me- How could it? They grew up together, had been through so much, and I had only joined in months ago. I might have been their sister, but it didn't matter.

When we stopped in front of the two story brick building, we were immediately approached by demons.

"We're here to see your boss." Dean said. "No tricks or nothin, we just wanna talk."

Surprisingly enough they actually complied to our request- And led us inside the building. It was dank and dirty, the wood floors were all but completely stripped of varnish, leaving it splintered and cracked. The walls were stained with I didn't want to know what and the whole place reeked of mold and must. Not exactly the nicest place for Lucifer to stash himself, but he was the devil so of course he deserved only the worst. They stopped at a random door down the dark hallway and pushed it open. Then, simply turned and left us alone.

Already I could feel something wasn't exactly right- Well, duh, of course nothing was right about this situation seeing is that we were confronting Satan, but- I had a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach that couldn't be explained.

But, I realized what caused it as soon as we stepped inside the room and the door slammed closed behind us and seemingly disappeared into the wall.

It wasn't Lucifer standing at the end of a long rickety table- It was Raphael and Zachariah.

"What the hell?" Dean said, he reached into his jacket to pull out a weapon but with a raise of Raphaels hand each man went soaring across the room and was pinned to the wall.

All but myself. I was left standing in the middle of the floor alone and unable to move.

"This has gone on long enough-" Zach said. "We're tired of chasing you maggots, we're tired of trying to make any deals, this is going to end right here and now."

An angel blade suddenly slid out of Raphaels sleeve.

"What is this?" Cas said, he too was stuck against the wall and couldn't budge. "What are you doing?!"

"We're being rid of a dangerous threat, Castiel-" Raphael said calmly. "She must be disposed of so the apocalypse will happen. The longer she parades around this world freely, the longer it will be delayed."

So this entire thing was a set up. They led us to believe Lucifer was here, and even conspired with demons to make their ploy more believable- And here we were, stupid and blindly walking straight into their trap.

It happened so fast, so quickly in fact that I barely had the chance to blink or take a breath before Raphael appeared in front of me and plunged his angel blade into my stomach.

After the fiery hot pain I felt myself collapse to my knees. Things were in slow motion, everything muted as my body slumped to the ground. Sam and Dean were screaming, but I couldn't hear them. Cas and Bobby were fighting their way past Zachariah and Raphael who were trying to subdue them. But they quickly vanished from the room shortly after.

The room around me began to grow dim, the light fading to practically nothing as I felt the life draining from me. I instinctively reached out to whomever might be near and felt my hands grasp hold of someones arm.

"Lara..." Dean said, scooping me up by the shoulders so that my head was on his lap. "Hold on, we're gonna get you some help. Just hold on."

I couldn't speak, my breathing was labored and raspy as blood began to rise in my throat. And throughout the entire ordeal, the physical pain was the last thing my thoughts could process. The only thing that kept repeating over and over again was the moments shared with them. You always hear how your life flashes before your eyes right before death, and it definitely was. And- the only part of my life that held any significance was the months I had been with my family.

I could see the times filled with practical jokes and innocent squabbles. The first time Sam and I had ever really sat and talked. The moments where nothing was even spoken, and yet- Somehow I still knew that precise point in time, was more important than any of the years before I knew them.

"No, no no." I barely heard Sam say. "Lara, don't close your eyes. Stay with us, just hold on."

Cas fell down beside the three of us, he of course tried to heal me but just as always it didn't work. He immediately started reciting the incantation, his words were so fast I could barely understand them.

"Hold on, sport." Dean said, shaking me by the shoulders. "Just hold on."

I wanted to, I really did- But I was being pulled away by an unseen force... A bright light enveloped me and I felt the last few breaths escape my lungs before all was silent and still.

There they were... All four of them, knelt around me, each with a different expression.

For a moment I couldn't help but shake my head at how they were carrying on, and at myself, for actually having to see my own body lying lifeless on the ground. But, there I stood, on the outskirts of the scene, the pain was gone, the blood faded away.

Sam was crying, Dean, his expression was anger mixed with grief. Before long he stood and screamed out something intangible as a chair was sent soaring through the air. Bobby looked ready to pass out. And Cas... Poor Cas... I wasn't sure what to make of him. His back was pressed against the wall where he sat, his knees bent and eyes widened.

"Lara." A sweet voice said.

I turned slowly to see a young woman standing behind me, with shoulder length dark hair, and equally dark eyes. She smiled at me, and it was actually somewhat comforting.

"Who are you?" I asked.

"My name is Tessa. I'm here to move you on- It's time to move on."

My attention went back to my brothers and Cas, and I took a step forward.

"To where?" I asked now.

"I can't tell you that... I'm sorry. But you can't stay here any longer. You need to pass on, Lara."

A tear ran down my cheek which I quickly brushed away. I didn't even get to tell them what needed to be said. There was so much that I never got the chance to tell them and now I never would. How that my life was completely meaningless until I met them... How I really did love them. There wasn't even a chance to tell them all goodbye.

"Lara." Tessa moved closer to stand beside me. "This isn't going to get any easier, the longer you delay it, the more painful it will be..."

"You don't understand." I sobbed.

"Yes I do." I felt her take my hand. "I understand you feel as though you have so many missed opportunities, but staying here like this will never fill that void. All that will be left is loneliness and darkness. Let me help you, let me send you to a better place."

I knew she was right. Staying here in the form of a spirit would never work... So, I took a few more steps closer until I was standing over them. I wished there was a way to tell them that it was going to be ok, that they would move on and forget about me. Instead, I let out a quiet sigh and said.

"Goodbye."

The one thing I wanted to make certain was that each and every one of them would be ingrained in my memory- I never wanted to forget even the most minute detail. Finally I turned to Tessa and nodded.

"I'm ready."

She smiled and opened her arms and pulled me close. For the second time I was enveloped in a bright white light as everything I was and ever could have been disappeared.

* * *

No one spoke any words after Lara was lied in the grave- Everyone was dead silent as Dean poured salt over the sheet covered remains. His expression was hard and cold- Sam stood in the background with his head hanged low. Bobby wouldn't leave the sanctuary of his car and Cas kept his eyes fixed on a grove of trees adjacent to the grave site.

"Do we really have to do this, Dean?" Sam asked. "Burning her... Can't we just..."

"What? Take the chance of her being a vengeful spirit? No. This is what she would have wanted and you know it. She wouldn't want any special treatment."

"But still..." Sam trailed off, there wasn't much to be said on the matter. They had done it with their Father, with anyone else that might have died around them. It just seemed so cold to actually burn their sisters body.

With a cringe Dean started pouring the gasoline over the sheet, trying to pretend that whoever was lying in that hole wasn't his little sister. After pulling out a matchbook and igniting all of them, he hesitated dropping it in for nearly two seconds before letting it go.

Immediately after the sheet went up in flames he turned and took a few good steps away. Cas lingered at the grave site for a minute or so before turning as well and stomping his way past Sam and Dean.

"Cas... What are you..."

"I'm going to find a way to bring her back." Cas interrupted Dean.

Sam and Dean exchanged glances, and neither could respond before Cas suddenly disappeared.


	35. Chapter 35

_**Ok so I was planning on starting a completely new story, but just decided to continue it on in this one. So consider this Part 2.**_

* * *

How does one describe heaven? Mystical perhaps? Beautiful and serene? Peaceful where there's no pain or misery, nothing to worry or fret over ever again? Perhaps some might describe their own personal heaven in such a way, but myself? It was more along the lines of my own personal hell.

Everyday, the same thing- I would wake in the farm house I grew up in outside of Indianapolis, completely alone. Everyday it was the same thing, over and over again. I wake, I wander aimlessly, I see the same landscape, landmarks, hear the same birds chirping- Over and over again. No change, no one around for me to talk to, nothing to do except sit and dwell over the fact that I was stuck in this place for eternity. It was only a matter of time before I would begin to lose my sanity. How could anyone think that this place would ever be considered heaven I just couldn't understand.

Weeks turned into months, months turned into what felt like decades. I had no idea how long I had been here- There really was no way of keeping track of the time here in this horrible place. All I knew was that after however many months passed I started getting desperate to feel something, anything, other than the loneliness. You would be surprised what you'd do if you were desperate enough. I think the craziest thing I did was swan diving off the roof of the house to the gravel driveway. It's sad how I wanted to feel the crunch of my bones, to feel some kind of pain, but each and every time I would get up, brush myself off and walk away. There was no pain here, no happiness, nothing but complete and utter misery and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it.

Before I died I had heard Sam and Dean claim there was a way to hop through other souls personal heavens, which I of course tried to do- But I was stuck in my box, there wasn't a way out. Calling out for help did absolutely nothing, praying as well had no affects what so ever. I even tried praying to Cas thinking, hey, the dude's an angel- Maybe he could jet on up here and talk to me but it never happened. I honestly didn't think _anyone _could hear me.

Normally a person would just accept their fate and stop dwelling on it- Suck it up and realize, hey you're frickin dead, what the hell is there to do _other _than accepting it? Nah... I wasn't a normal person. I wanted to get the fuck out of this hell hole. I wanted to breathe real air again, I wanted to see my brothers, Cas and Bobby. I wanted to feel like a person again instead of this cold and walking mannequin.

It was yet again the same thing I had experienced for months, walking through the farm house- Trying to pretend that this was reality instead of a cheap imitation, when I glanced out the window and noticed a figure standing at the end of the driveway.

If I had a heart anymore, it would have leapt to my throat at the site- I didn't care who it was, it could have been a friggin demon for all I cared and I still would have been thankful to at least talk to someone!

I darted out the front door, down the porch steps and past the brick sidewalk before stopping and noticing- Hell... I knew this person.

It was Lee, just standing there in that black overcoat with the same smug expression he always held.

"Lee?" I wanted to pinch myself, but you didn't dream in heaven. "Why are..."

"I thought it was time I came and said hello." He replied. "And to see how you're holding up."

I was just so grateful to see someone I didn't even stop myself from wrapping my arms around him and sobbing. He of course didn't return the gesture and went stiff at the sentiment.

"It's so good to see you-" I said, pulling away and wiping my eyes. "You have no idea how horrible this has been."

"I know. Believe me when I brought you here I thought this would be your fondest memory. I was convinced it was from what I saw from you."

Taking a step back, I tried to understand what he meant by that. "You? You brought me here?"

He nodded. "After you were killed I knew that the safest place for your soul would be here- This is where I have been hiding for centuries trying to avoid execution. I only modified it to look like your past home. Apparently though I've done something wrong if you're so miserable."

Should I be angry right now? Something told me that, yes, yes I should be. But I wasn't sure why.

"So you knew I died?"

His blue-green eyes trailed off to the distance and the strategically placed corn fields surrounding the house.

"Lara- There's something we need to speak about. And, I'm quite certain you'll be angry with me, but just know that I was only going on orders."

Uhh... How was I supposed to take that? Whatever it was was surely going to piss me off, but what else could I do but nod and lead him to the front porch swing where I took a seat. If I blew up at him it might just give him incentive to flutter away and I would be left alone again.

"First, let me tell you that I wasn't entirely truthful of my orders before you passed away. There was _some _truth to it, but I neglected to inform you of a crucial aspect..." He paused, his tone serious. "My orders were to ensure that you were not harmed during the hunt for the horsemans rings, to be certain that Sam and Dean retrieved them all- But, after that hunt was over if for any reason you _were _harmed, or injured to the point of death, I wasn't supposed to intervene. I was to let you die." My mouth went agape as my body went stiff. "I was there after Raphael stabbed you. I watched the entire incident, only- You just couldn't see me."

"What?!" I jumped to my feet. "So you just stood there and let me die!"

"I'm sorry, but yes. Those were my orders."

"Fuck your orders! My god, are you just a puppet or do you have your own god damned mind?!"

"You don't understand. When God gives an order you do not disobey..."

"Right... Sure- Why would you care, huh? It's not like it's _you _that died and left your friends and loved ones behind to fight on their own. Nah, it's no big deal to you because you can just come back up here and hide. As long as your obeying your orders, who cares about anyone else, right?"

He sighed and shook his head. "I obeyed my orders, which I'm glad I did..." He noticed my fists clenching. "But- Just because that's so it doesn't mean I agree with what happened. I've received no further orders and I realize now that allowing you to die and come here was wrong. I never anticipated how miserable you would be. Heaven is supposed to be a souls sanctuary, and apparently that isn't what it is for you."

"Ya think?" I crossed my arms.

"Which is why I'm going to send you back." He quickly replied.

Had I actually been alive I'm sure the color would have drained from my face. "What?"

"You heard me. You don't belong here, I made a mistake and you need to be sent back. How could I live with myself if I knew I was the cause of your misery? What would that make me?" I nearly jumped for joy but he kept talking. "But, there are of course conditions to going back, Lara. It's not like I can just wave a magic wand and everything will be fine and dandy."

I was going to agree to whatever he said. "Ok, yeah, of course. What is it?"

"For starters you need to realize that quite a lot has changed down there in your time away. It's been nearly two years."

"Oh my god... Two years?"

"But, when you go back under no circumstances can you pray to Castiel, god, or anyone because the second you do every other angel will hear it and know you're alive and you'll find yourself back in this exact situation. If you're extremely desperate I'm the only one you can contact because let's just say I'm on a different frequency of angel radio." Now his face hardened. "And, when you go back- You have to be certain you assist Sam and Dean in every venture- No matter what it may be, even if it's something that affects you personally."

Ok, there was clearly a hidden message somewhere between the lines of that statement.

"Is that all?"

He snickered. "Other than apologizing for putting you through this? No. I will warn you though that the process of sending you back could be very uncomfortable. Especially since your sodding brothers went and burned your remains. I have to put your body back together again."

In the excitement of what he just told me I almost turned and went to pack my things, suddenly remembering that I didn't have any belongings here. This was heaven.

"Do I need to do anything?" I asked.

"No-" He gave a small smile. "Just, stand there and tolerate the pain."

Huh- Who would have thought that Lee could have actually ended up being a nice guy after all.

He tried to prep me on what to expect. Burning white light, the sensation of falling at a million miles per hour, feeling my soul crammed back into my body would feel along the lines of trying to stuff yourself through a keyhole. Basically it wasn't going to be a cup of tea, but I didn't care- I could burst into a flaming fireball and I wouldn't care as long as it meant I could go back. He also made sure to explain that I would still be human when I got there, the spell would still be intact and what I decided to do with that later on down the road was my choice only.

After he was through explaining he told me that he might pop in every now and then, but other than that I wouldn't see much of him. He was still in hiding after all and was taking a great risk already by sending me back. So, with nothing else left to do but get this over with, he placed his hand on my forehead.

It was just as he said it would be. Burning white light, falling at such a speed I was certain all of my skin would have been torn from me, and then finally the horrible experience of my soul being returned to my body. It wasn't so much painful as it was incredibly uncomfortable and awkward. Like trying to stuff yourself into a pair of jeans that were ten sizes too small, combined with trying to breath under water. When it was finally all over and done with, and my eyes opened to see the bright sun shining above me- I sucked in a deep lung full of air and tried to shake the dizziness.

My hands were shaking, and it felt almost foreign at trying to remember how to blink, breathe and function back in my own body. And don't get me started on gravity- My body felt like it weighed a ton, and forcing myself to sit up took practically every ounce of energy I had.

Now I examined my surroundings. Where ever I was, it was actually pretty nice. A meadow surrounded by tall trees with a perfect view of a lake in the background. Wow... Sam and Dean really put it into consideration of where they planted me. It was nice to know they didn't just dig a hole in a ditch somewhere.

Ok, So. I was back- And now came the annoying part of trying to figure out where the hell I was and how I was going to find Sam and Dean. As Lee said, praying to Cas was out of the question, so there went having my teleporting angel zap me to wherever my brothers were. The only thing I could do now was start walking. Which I did... It took nearly twenty minutes to leave the field behind and come across a narrow gravel road.

There were no houses or any buildings, and I had no idea which way to go- So I just chose a random direction and headed left.

The sun was scorching hot, and I had to take my jacket off and tie it around my waist. I was guessing it was at the peak of summer, judging by the heat and humidity and swarming bugs. Was I still in Indiana? More then likely so, because that's where I had died- And I seriously doubted that Sam or Dean would drive around with my gooey corpse for a very long distance.

I walked for over an hour before coming to an actual paved road, which I now started down. A sign pointed me in the direction of a tiny town called Boswell, population of less than eight hundred people. Hey, at least I had an actual destination now, and maybe could find a frickin payphone somewhere.

It was after walking down a random street in this town that I started to feel like I had just entered the twilight zone. The once completely empty and devoid of life streets were suddenly swarming with old cars, people walking and on bicycles. And every single person slowed their pace just enough to blatantly gawk at me.

Uhhh. Yeah, I know I was dead not two hours ago but comon- I couldn't have looked that bad... Could I? I glanced down at myself- I was completely spotless. Since I didn't have to go all night of the living dead and crawl out of my own grave, my clothes weren't dirty or tattered. Lee did a pretty good job at putting me back together again, had to give the guy props for that. My hair was still the same length, just an inch above my waist, same weight, same body shape- Everything. Hell even my clothes were the same. So why exactly were these freak jobs staring at me like I was an alien from outer space?

I tried to ignore them as I kept walking, eventually coming to a run down and pretty dinky looking restaurant. There weren't many cars in the parking lot- But there were a couple tractors. When I stepped inside, I relished the air conditioning- And yet again tried to ignore the patrons that were there staring at me.

The counter was pretty close to the door so I approached it and waited for someone to come help. Before long a tall blonde woman came over and gave me a dirty look.

"Can I help you?" She asked.

"Hi, yeah- I was wondering if I could use your phone? I noticed a pay phone out in the hallway but I don't have any change."

She stared at me with a horrible frown. "Is it a long distance call?"

"No, of course not." I lied, fuck telling the truth right now. "It's just to my aunt, my car broke down out of town."

I swear if her mouth curved downward anymore it would fall off her face entirely.

"Alright then. Go ahead, but make it quick." She pointed to the phone hanging on the wall.

She went back into the kitchen and I darted for the phone. I dialed every single one of Sam and Deans numbers, getting nothing but a message saying they had been disconnected. Dammit, those boys buy new phones more often than buying new underwear. Next in line was calling Bobby... Yet again, no answer. What the hell? Seriously? What does a girl gotta do to catch a frickin break around here?

Judging by the looks of the people sitting around the dirty tables, I didn't think any would have a laptop- And even if they did, I very much doubted this place had wi-fi. Great... So now what?

I hanged up and let out a quiet curse, moving across the dining area and tried to figure out my next move. Before long a man in overalls approached me, looked me up and down and said.

"I don't know you."

"Ook." I said, taking a step away. "Back up there, Jethro- I'm just passing through."

He scowled at me and kept on walking- And as he passed I made a quick swipe and stole his wallet. He didn't notice of course, and I quickly pocketed it before leaving the restaurant and sifting through finding forty bucks and a debit card.

I started walking again until finding a library on Main street. Thank god, finally I could get access to a computer. Inside the people were a little more hospitable- The Librarian was a middle aged woman with dark hair and glasses, and was disgustingly cheerful. She instructed me on how to use the computer, even though I already knew how- But I listened anyhow. And after asking her if I could borrow her cell phone, she actually obliged and gave me some privacy.

It took a few times calling Sam and Deans preferred cell phone provider before spouting the correct fake alias and having the GPS activated on Deans phone. And after clicking around on the computer I sat back and smacked my hands together.

"Yes! Finally!" I shouted, receiving a shush from the librarian.

My brothers were in Springfield Missouri, hot damn I was finally onto something.

Now one might ask why I didn't just call up my brothers and tell them I was alive- But that wasn't a good idea. They would think I was a demon or something, and then just deactivate their phone and I'd be in the same situation all over again. So, the only thing I could do was just drive to their location.

So after leaving the library I found the first vehicle that didn't look like it would fall apart, and there was no one around- Hot-wired the bitch and started driving.

* * *

During the drive I stopped just long enough to swap out license plates and fill up with gas- It took way longer than I wanted to actually get to Springfield, and by the time I drove up into town it was well past noon the next day. I found the first place that would have wi-fi, and yet again tracked Deans phone- Finding them hauled up in one of their usual cheap motels.

My stomach was twisting into knots as I pulled into the parking lot and at seeing Deans impala parked outside one of the doors. There was no way of knowing how they were going to respond to seeing me again after so long. Chances were they would douse me in holy water and try to stab me with a silver knife just to make sure I wasn't a monster or demon. But that was ok. I didn't care. They could do whatever they wanted to guarantee I was actually their sister and not some dangerous freak.

When I approached the door I instantly heard shouting from the inside. Typical, I come back for a happy family reunion and my boys are already at each others throats. Well, time to interrupt their squabble I thought, so I reached and knocked a good five times.

The shouting abruptly stopped as I heard stomping footsteps approach the door. It was yanked open and I looked up to see Sam.

He stared at me, of course looking completely stunned to the point of being silent, and I tried to break the awkwardness by smiling.

"Hey, Sammy. You look good."

Dean walked over and pushed his way past Sam, only to stop and give me the same stunned expression.

"Jeez. Comon you two. It's not that big of a surprise is it?" I laughed nervously. "So, do whatever you gotta do to make sure it's me. Holy water, silver, all that crap."

Deans eyes were as wide as saucers. "Lara?"

"Yeah... I know. It's crazy. Dead sister back in the flesh. Now are you gonna let me in or am I just gonna have to stand out here and roast in the sun?"

Dean responded to that by grabbing me and pulling me into a tight hug.

"I can't believe the son of a bitch did it." He said.

I struggled to breathe with my face smushed into his shoulder, as soon as he pulled away I was yet again crushed by Sam. He actually scooped me up and my feet dangled a good foot away from the ground.

No this wasn't the reaction I was expecting, it was a million times better. But, when Sam finally put me down and I stepped inside Dean poured me a shot of holy water.

"Just to be safe." He said with a wink.

I quickly downed the water and held my hand out. "Silver knife?"

After cutting a decent sized gash in my forearm Sam handed me a towel from the bathroom to stop the bleeding. They practically crowded around me as I took a seat at the end of a bed and let out a sigh. My eyes trailed around the room, noticing that we were one angel short.

"Where's Cas?" I asked.

They looked at each other. "Wait-" Sam said. "He didn't bring you back?"

"No? Lee did."

"Lee?" Dean crossed his arms. "You mean, six winged douche bag Lee?"

"Yeah- I guess we can't refer to him as that anymore, huh?" I chuckled. "So, guys really... Where's Cas?" When they went silent my stomach dropped to my feet. "He's not..."

"No-" Dean shook his head. "He's not dead."

"Then why are you acting like he is? What happened?"

Sam let out a sigh and brushed his hair from his face. "Uh... Let's just say that he didn't exactly take your death very well, kiddo."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Dean grabbed a chair and sat down in front of me. "After you were gone he tried to find you. He said he searched through all of heaven, even hell- And since we burned your body, we knew you weren't a spirit..."

"Ok?"

"Long story short-" Sam continued. "Since he couldn't find you he kinda got it into his head that the reason for that... Was because he wasn't strong enough. And, he wanted to take out Raphael."

They both stopped and I was about to slap the both of them. "Oh my god, would you just spit it out already?"

"He's gone darkside." Dean finally announced. "Or, is trying to."

I went silent as Sam and Dean both went into the long and torturous story of what happened during the time I was gone. Apparently Sam had ended up saying yes to Lucifer, somehow managed to take control over his own mind and jump in the pit taking Michael with him- Came back almost instantly, but without his soul. For over a year he let Dean believe he was dead before a situation with a Djinn forced him to come out of hiding. Months passed, Sam basically flipped the fuck out because without a soul he was a living terminator- Dean made a deal with Death to get Sams soul back- And during all of this Castiel was going behind their backs and making deals with Crowley to... Get this... Somehow break into frickin _Purgatory_ to get the souls. So, now- Sam was as well as could be expected with his soul back and a wall inside his mind to block the memories of his time spent in hell, Lucifer was in his cage, oh yeah and Dean had a _girlfriend_ and practically a step-son for the entire year Sam was gone, which he dumped when Sammy came back. Now apparently Sam and Dean were trying to figure out a way of stopping Cas from getting the souls and going on a vengeance quest against Raphael for killing me?

What the hell did I come back to?!

"So-" My voice was so quiet even I struggled to hear it. "Does Cas know that you know about this?"

Dean shrugged. "Probably. But we haven't said anything to him about it."

"We wanted to somehow find a way of stopping him-" Sam went on. "Maybe now we've got pretty good leverage, huh?"

"Yeah-" Dean smiled slightly. "Maybe you can talk him down from that ledge."

"Um... Why would he do something so drastic just for revenge?"

"Cause not only did he kill you, which apparently sent him over the edge- But Raphael is trying to take over heaven- And killing those that refuse to join him." Dean finished.

I took my head into my hands, really couldn't I have just come back to my brothers and Cas and things be like they usually are? Ghosts, vamps, normal everyday monsters?

"So, why don't we call him up?" Sam said. "Tell him that Lara's alive..."

"You can't do that!" I jerked my head up. "Lee said that there can be no praying to anyone. If word spreads that I'm back then... BAM- I'm dead again. You're gonna have to get him here on your own without mention of me."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Well, that's just great- Cause Cas sure has been comin whenever we call."

"Lie to him." Sam said. "Say something, _anything_. Tell him I'm dying, you're dying- Whatever it'll take to get his attention."

Dean mumbled incoherent curses under his breath, then stared up towards the ceiling.

"Cas... Dude, I know you got your angel ears on- Look, uh- We got a situation down here, a pretty bloody and nasty one. So if you could get your feathery ass down here it'd be great." After an entire minute of nothing but silence Dean held his arms up. "See, nothin."

"Well we'll just have to keep trying." Sam sighed. "In the mean time, our sister's back- So why don't we actually take a break for once, huh?"

"Just what are you guys doin in Springfield anyways?" I asked.

"Typical job, which we took care of this morning." Dean smiled and instantly I could tell he was lying. "So, ya hungry, cupcake?"

"Hungry?" I grinned. "Dude- I haven't eaten anything in almost two years, I'd kill for a cheeseburger."

Dean stood and put me in a childish headlock and dragged me towards the door. "Then let's go."


	36. Chapter 36

I gotta say, it was nice to be back. It's funny how much you miss the little things when you're dead as a doornail. I never thought that a cheeseburger could taste so incredible. The only downside obviously was hearing that Cas was trying to do something so incredibly stupid, and for what? Revenge? No, shit like that didn't fly with me. It's one thing to sacrifice yourself for those you care about, it's another to go off the deep end and do something so dangerous just because you're ticked off. Although, I'm sure he felt it was reason enough since Raphael was also trying to nuke all of heaven.

"So, are you gonna call Bobby and fill him in?" I asked with my mouth full.

"Yeah, or we could just drive up there and surprise him." Dean smiled.

"I don't wanna give the old man a heart attack." Finally I pushed my plate away. "Maybe calling him would be better?"

"First thing's first." Sam interjected. "Why don't you tell us why Lee decided to send you back, huh?"

After chugging down a few gulps of delicious coke I nodded. "Well, it's just gonna piss you off when I tell you."

"That's not surprising, since the dude's a dick." Dean said.

"Well, basically he told me that his orders from God were to make sure you guys got all four rings, and afterwards if something happened to me which would result in my dying, then he was just supposed to let me die."

Sam and Deans face went blank. "You mean, he was there when you croaked?" Dean asked.

"Nice way of phrasing it, bud- But yeah... He saw the entire thing. Anyways... After noticing how incredibly miserable I was up there, because I was all alone the entire time- He decided to do me a solid and send me back."

"So you didn't get to heaven hop?" Sam shook his head. "You couldn't go and visit anyone?"

"No, apparently I was locked in the box Lee kept himself in to hide from the archangels. I guess that's why Cas couldn't find me when he was searching heaven."

Sam sighed. "Sorry, kiddo- Didn't sound like much fun up there."

"Tell me about it." I took another sip. "But yeah, that's basically it. Oh, and he told me that I was supposed to help you guys even if it affected me personally. Didn't know what he meant by that, but I guess he was talking about Cas' shenanigans."

"Hey explain somethin to me." Dean said. "Before you... Yeah, well before you died- Cas was mumbling something in Enochian... Do you know what it was?"

I sat back and looked from brother to brother. "You mean, Cas didn't tell you?" They both shook their heads. "Before we took off to Brookston Cas told me that he had memorized the incantation to reverse the spell placed on me. I guess he thought if he could spit it out in time it would keep me from dying... Which, obviously, didn't work."

"Uh, so that means you could still reverse it?" Sams brows rose.

"Nice observation, Captain Obvious. But, no. I mean, if it's not completely necessary I'd rather not do it."

Dean of course agreed with me. "Right, well- It's not necessary. Nothin goin on here besides the usual. Yeah and Cas going all bat shit crazy."

God Dean was a horrible liar- Sometimes I thought he was even worse than Cas. Something clearly was going on that they didn't want to tell me about. Maybe there was more to this Cas story than they let on? Maybe they thought him to be a lost cause... Oh god, maybe they even considered killing him? No, they wouldn't go that far would they? I mean... It's Cas we're talking about here, not some crazy demon or butt-hole archangel. But, I didn't want to stir shit up so soon after coming back, so I decided against grilling them for the moment and instead tried to coax Dean into praying to Cas again. Which he did, and the results were the same as the last... Nothing...

I was starting to wonder exactly how long I could really keep myself hidden from Raphael or any other angel that had a stick up their butts when it concerned me. Eventually someone would catch site of me and then word would spread. And, they would be after me a second time...

Suddenly I realized something. Since I died, and my body was torched, did that mean the carvings on my ribs were gone? Ah crap. I bet they were, which meant I was basically a walking neon sign for all angels that had a grudge against me. Yeah, Cas needed to get his cute little tushie down here pronto, or else I would find myself with an angel blade in my stomach again. Plus... It would be nice to actually see him again.

We paid the tab at the diner and returned to the motel room- And I was actually thankful to lie on that lumpy uncomfortable bed. I didn't care how rough things were down here, how dangerous and horrible- It was a million times better than being stuck in that box upstairs.

"So what's the plan now?" I asked.

"Well I don't know about you-" Dean answered. "But I'm gonna annoy the crap outa Cas until he gets his ass down here."

"Sammy?" I looked to Sam now.

"I guess I'll look around for a case."

I propped my arms behind my head. "It's nice to know that sometimes things never change."

* * *

Several days passed and so far Castiel still hadn't come when Dean called. I was starting to worry even more than I already was, wondering if maybe Raphael got the best of him?

Things were quiet for the moment as far as no jobs went- So we decided to take a trip to Bobbys so I could finally show him I wasn't dead anymore. When we pulled into the drive, unfortunately his car was no where site, and after Dean made a quick call we found out he wouldn't be back for another day or so. He of course said we could crash at his place, just as he always did. And for the first hour after arriving the only thing I did was walk around and soak in the dusty old spiced mixed air.

I ran my fingertips along the wall upstairs as I walked, smiling slightly at hearing the quiet banter between my brothers downstairs. But when I suddenly heard another voice join in, my heart leapt to my throat.

Oh yeah, I definitely recognized that gruff voice- So I flew towards the stairs and started down, hitting the doorway and noticing Cas standing with his back towards me in front of Sam and Dean.

"So-" Dean said, trying not to smirk. "I guess you finally decided to answer me, huh?"

"I told you, Dean-" Cas said. "There is a civil war in heaven, I can't just leave whenever you call..." He seemed to eye both brothers for a moment. "I thought you said there was an incident? Something dangerous that required my attention?"

"Uh-" Sam gave half a smile. "Well, there was an incident, but... It wasn't exactly dangerous."

"You know I don't understand your strange sense of humors-"

I interrupted Cas by giving a playful knock on the door frame I leaned against- When he turned around his face went even more blank than usual.

"Hi." I said, giving a sarcastic little wave.

"Oh, by the way-" Dean stated like a smart-ass. "Lara's back."

Cas literally looked like he was going to crap himself- Which of course wasn't possible since he was an angel but you get what I mean. He didn't say anything, I don't know if it was because he couldn't- Or if he was trying to decipher in his mind how in the hell I was standing in front of him. After a good thirty seconds of nothing but silence Dean shifted on his feet and muttered.

"_Awkwarddd_."

"Yeah, uh- I think they might have a crap load of things to talk about." Sam grabbed Dean by the shoulders and forcefully dragged him outside.

Once the door closed I gave a half of a nervous smile.

"Well, looks like someone could knock you over with a feather." I said.

I couldn't believe how much I actually missed his squinty eyed expressions.

"How is this possible?" He finally spoke.

"Want the long story, or short story?"

He shook his head slightly. "Either."

I pushed away from the door frame and joined him in the den.

"Well, in answer to how I'm back. Lee's responsible for that."

"Leesander? Why?"

"He felt guilty I guess, or felt sorry for me I don't know. He thought I would be better off down here instead of stuck up there." After a deep breath I went on. "So, I heard you were looking for me upstairs?" His eyes got all shifty which nearly made me chuckle. "It's not your fault you couldn't find me, ya know? That's on Lee too. He kept me in his special hiding place."

His eyes fell to the floor. "Sam and Dean told you? What else did they tell you?"

"Hm. Well, if you're wondering if they told me about you flippin out and making a deal with Crowley to get the souls out of purgatory, yeah- I know about that. Is there anything else I should know about before I kick the crap outa you?"

Surely I couldn't be that intimidating could I? But he just wouldn't look at me.

"You don't understand the situation. Raphael was out of control and I could do nothing to stop it. He slaughtered you."

I moved closer and grabbed his chin forcing him to look at me.

"Dude... I'm not dead anymore, are you blind? And even if I never had come back, still- Purgatory, Cas? Really?" I shook my head. "You gotta know that this isn't the solution."

"As I said-" He sighed. "You don't understand the situation. Raphael has started a war in heaven. Thousands of my brothers and sisters are dying and no one has the means of stopping him."

I flopped down on Bobbys sofa. "And you never even bothered to think of coming to Sam or Dean for help? You know they would have done whatever they could to give you hand."

"This is something completely out of their elements- The war is in heaven."

"Still... You underestimate them, Cas. You're their best friend, they would have done everything they could. I mean, my god- They took down Lucifer and Michael, don't they deserve a little credit for that?"

"Why risk their lives for a battle that's mine?"

"That's the thing- It doesn't have to _just _be _your _battle. In case you haven't noticed we're a four package deal, which means if one of us is in trouble, than the other three will step our asses up and do something about it." Why was my stomach suddenly twisting into knots. "You don't have to do this, Cas. At least give us a chance to help you out." He didn't respond to that. "You know, it's kinda sad. I come back from the dead after nearly two years of going crazy upstairs all by myself, and already things are going to shit."

I glanced out the window and noticed Sam and Dean pacing around the impala. Those two idiots, what did they think was gonna happen in here that would require privacy? I mean, did they really think that I alone would have some kind of impact on Cas' decisions?

"I don't understand why you're so offended by this, Lara. I'm only doing what I have to do." He said.

"Really? You don't understand?" I flew to my feet. "It's because making a deal with Crowley for one thing is sure to bite you in the ass later, and another- There can be nothin good about getting souls from Purgatory, and third- I don't want anything to happen to you, you moron!"

It was beginning to feel like I was talking to a brick wall and I tried to remind myself if Cas had ever been this bullheaded?

"I am sorry, Lara. And, for what it's worth I am happy that you're back."

My eyes fell up to his. "Yeah? Well please don't make me regret coming back here, Cas. The last thing I want to see is you getting yourself killed."

I don't know what upset me more, the fact that he seemed so cold about that statement, or that he didn't promise me that he'd be careful. Seriously, what the hell did I come back to?

Sam and Dean returned inside a few minutes later, and seeing is that my expression could probably crack glass by being so horrid they instantly knew my little "chat" with Cas did no good. He lingered around for a little while longer and I tried my best to avoid his gazes, and eventually he must have gotten fed up with getting the cold shoulder- Announced that he had to return to heaven, and fluttered away.

After he was gone, Dean fetched three beers from the fridge and handed them out. I chugged more than half of mine before Dean said.

"You gotta keep on him, Lara. You're the only one that might be able to stop this purgatory crap."

"Me?" I rolled my eyes. "Dude, in case you didn't notice- That little convo we had just now had absolutely no affect on him. Why do you think that I can change his mind?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

I looked from Sam to Dean, just as I always did when I was confused as crap. "Uh, no?"

"Seriously?" Sam snickered. "You're really that dense?"

"Apparently so, what the eff are you talking about?"

"The sweet little angel wants to cut himself a slice of sister pie." Dean said with a sneer.

My face went blank. "What the hell does that even mean?!"

Sam shook his head and stared at the ceiling. "What Dean was trying to say... Is that Cas likes you."

"Duh." I shrugged. "He likes all of us?"

Now Sam put both hands to cover his face. "Wow, ok. Do we have to draw you a picture?"

"The dude _likes _you." Dean spat out. "Don't tell me you didn't know that?"

I started to laugh, waiting for them to join in with me and announce that was their idea of a weird joke. When they both stood there and didn't make a sound my face suddenly went blank.

"Bullshit." I said. "That's bullshit."

"Ok, if you say so." Dean shrugged.

I shifted on the couch, back and forth a good five times over while my eyes fixed on the floor in confusion.

"Did he tell you that?"

"No-" Sam answered. "Didn't really have to."

"You mean to tell me-" I stood again. "That you two dip-shits realized this a long time ago? And I didn't?"

With his arms crossed Deans smirk suddenly faded. "Ah crap. What does this make me now? A chick?"

"Shut up, Dean." Sam huffed. "Look, Lara- Yeah we could be wrong, but I dunno, it just seemed kind of obvious. Of course with Cas it's a little hard to read him."

"No shit- How did you two even come up with this in the first place?" When they didn't answer I nodded. "Ah ok. So, what- You think because he kept my secret and helped me out every now and then, that's the proof you needed? Well if that's the case then he's got the hots for you too Dean, and you Sammy. Because he hasn't done anything but help all of us equally. Next time you try to mess with my head, come up with something a little better than that."

Dean started to grumble. "Jeez who punched you in the ovaries?"

"I dunno. I guess being dead for two years can make a girl a little cranky-" I sat again. "Now. Since we're already arguing. Why don't you guys be honest with me and tell me what you've been hiding?"

As far as I was concerned I was pushing the drivel Sam and Dean spouted to the back of my mind and I wasn't going to think of it again. And I of course expected them to deny holding any information from me, but was pleasantly and also frighteningly surprised when Sam started talking.

I listened to everything he said with what felt like a brick in my stomach. It wasn't just that Cas was trying to get the souls out of Purgatory, apparently they were still trying to find the location- And in order for that to happen it required Crowley torturing every sort of monster available to try and get information. Sam and Deans Grandfather had been resurrected specifically for giving Crowley a helping hand in rounding up the creepy crawlies- And last but certainly not least they were currently in search of what Dean described was "The Mother of all." Apparently this _Eve _was the one to create all monsters so many thousands of years ago. Vampires, Werewolves, everything disgusting and horrible all stemmed from this one woman, who in my opinion- Obviously wasn't a woman at all. So, basically we went from one huge problem which was Lucifer, and then straight to another one who was practically just as big.

And, their reasons for being in Springfield was that they thought they had a lead on her, which turned out to be a dead end. Bobby was obviously in on this party too, and was out with his buddy Rufus trying to sniff this bitch out. Yeah... Not exactly the best of news to come back to after nearly two years of being dead- And wanting nothing more than to see my brothers and friends again.

"So, now you know." Sam said with a sigh.

"Yeah... Great." I put my head in my hands.

"Well at least you can help us stomp this monster, huh?" Dean smiled.

"Well, yeah. But do we even know how to gank her? What kills the Mother of all creepy and horrible?"

"Uh... We're still working on that." Sam answered.

"Awesome-" I lied back on the sofa. "So this should be a butt load of fun, huh?"

"Only the best for you, baby." Dean snickered.

Well, at least things hadn't changed too drastically. Everything was just as it usually was. Dangerous monster wanting to chew our pretty faces off, us having no idea how to take said monster down. Yep, same ol' same ol'. And even though I was pissed at Cas at the moment it didn't mean that I was going to give up on him. I was gonna figure out a way to somehow talk him out of this Purgatory bull crap, one way or the other.


	37. Chapter 37

Bobby called Dean a day after crashing at his place, stating that he had something big and he was gonna need our help. So, after an awkward convo and Dean finally admitting that I was alive, which of course resulted in Bobby spouting gibberish about my possibly being a demon or monster-It only took a few seconds of talking to the man myself for him to finally be convinced that I really was me. And of course after explaining to him the severity of keeping my being alive a secret, we hanged up and starting packing up the car.

As I was digging through the trunk of the impala I gave a slight smile at noticing that my brothers hadn't thrown away any of my belongings. All of my clothes, weapons and random pieces of crap was still stuffed in my duffel bag and crammed in the back of the trunk. And here I thought my boys weren't sentimental at all?

Dean joined me a short time later and apparently didn't approve of how I arranged his weapons and started doing it again.

"I called Cas." He said. "Told him that we had a real issue this time and could use his help. Whether he shows or not, I got no idea."

"It's still hard to believe." I admitted. "That Cas could really do something so reckless."

"Guess we all got our breaking points, kid." He shrugged.

It always seemed like Cas was on a special timer- One where he would always appear when the conversation was semi private.

"Hello." He gruffly said, and for a moment I felt my heart drop at the times in the past when such a monotone voice always accompanied a good friend with good intentions.

"Yeah, hey-" Dean said. "Well call me crazy, but I didn't think you'd show."

"Several of my brethren are going to take my place during my absence. What is it that you need help with?"

"Not sure just yet-" Dean shrugged. "Might be a lead on Eve."

"And, for the record." I chimed in. "We don't have a way to kill the bitch- So even if it is a lead on her whereabouts, we're gonna get our asses killed. Good times."

Cas didn't seem to appreciate my sarcasm judging by his slight tilt head and scowl.

"If there is no way of killing Eve, then why would you go after her?" He asked.

Dean slammed the trunk closed. "Cause that's what we do. We stick our necks on the line to try and save a few bastards even if it means getting killed. What we _don't _do is completely ditch our friends." He paused and Cas continued to scowl. "Just sayin..."

"I'm here _now_, Dean. You might not approve of my methods for winning this war..."

"Yo," I interrupted. "No bitch fights right now, ok? There's no time for that. Cas is here now, let's not dwell on the negative."

Yeah, I know- I _always _dwell on the negative. I just didn't like seeing two of my boys fighting with each other. It's bad enough that Sam and Dean argued almost daily, I didn't want to see Cas pulled into squabbles too.

Dean still wasn't happy and I didn't blame him, so he returned to the house to finish packing up our crap. Cas stood awkwardly in front of me for a moment before saying.

"I don't know what I can do to convince Dean that I'm only doing what I have to do."

I leaned against the trunk and shrugged. "Cas... You're not going to be able to convince him. Because, no matter what your logic- What you're doing isn't right."

"Why? I'm doing this for _you_, for Sam and Dean- For everyone."

"Still doesn't make it right. Think about what you're doing. For one, you're working with Crowley, a demon- And not just any demon, the King of Hell. That's not exactly something to admire- And another, it's bad enough that you're searching for Purgatory, but you're taking monsters and torturing them for information. Now, I hate monsters just as much as the next person, but I don't care who or what it is, I don't condone torturing something." A shiver ran through me. "Trust me, I know just what that's like. In case you forgot, Crowley worked me over pretty damn good."

His jaw clenched. "And Crowley will pay for that in time."

"It's not even about that. I swear, you're as dense as a fence post sometimes. Listen-" I took a few steps closer until I was in front of him. "Since it's apparent you don't really give a crap what me, Sam or Dean think, I know I'm just wasting my breath. You're gonna do what you want no matter what. But, you need to realize that with these actions, there's going to be consequences. You can't expect them to overlook it, or even forgive you. Dean's pretty damn good at holding a grudge."

He moved his gazes to the house. "And what about you?"

"Me?" I shrugged. "I'd like to think I have an open mind- But you gotta understand there's a limit. I dunno, maybe I'm just being completely stupid but I'd like to think that you'll eventually realize that what you're doing just isn't worth it." He said nothing to that, and it took all my restraint to not physically throttle him. "Just what do you intend to do with those souls once you got em, huh?" Still, he didn't respond. "Ya know. Sam and Dean thought that maybe I could talk some sense into you. I don't know why they thought I would have any affect on your decisions but I thought I'd give it a shot. But for the record..." I jerked him by the arm. "I'm not going to say another word about this because there's just no point. My opinions are miniscule and apparently don't mean two shits to you. So, do whatever you want. It doesn't matter to me anymore."

I stomped towards the house trying to cool myself off.

"Lara..."

I held my hand up now. "We're not talking about it anymore, Cas. I'm done."

He had no choice but to follow me silently into the house, and after jabbering about the drive finally took off.

Bobby and Rufus were in McCall Idaho, so I settled in for a long exhausting drive. Yeah it would have been easier for Cas to just zap us there, but since he had been so unreliable lately we never knew when he was gonna take off and leave us stranded.

The entire sixteen hour drive I sat in the backseat with him beside me and I didn't utter a single word.

* * *

I was jostled awake by the car doors slamming, and when I sat up I noticed we were in front of another dump motel. Cas still sat in the back seat beside me, and for a moment I drearily caught myself gawking at him. For a split second I seemed to forget that he was really doing something so incredibly stupid behind our backs.

"Good morning." He said.

"Yeah... Where are we?"

"Idaho- Where Bobby and Rufus are supposed to be staying."

"Oh... Why are we just sitting in the car?"

"Because you were sleeping."

I pushed the door open and jogged to catch up with Sam and Dean who were stopping at a random motel door. Cas followed of course, remaining as silent as the dead and seeming to stay a good few feet away from the three of us. Who knows, maybe he thought we would gang up on him and beat the crap outa him.

Dean knocked a few times over before the door swung open and Bobby greeted us. He of course gave me a tight hug, saying over and over again how good it was to see me again and just as I was about to pass out from the lack of oxygen he let me go.

"Ok, down to business." He said, moving over the table where whom I assumed to be Rufus sat. "You gotta take a look at this."

He moved a laptop around so we could see and brought up what looked like a surveillance video. After pushing play we each moved closer.

It was obviously a shooting range. There were eight people all standing in their little slots aiming at targets which was out of the camera view. Nothing out of the ordinary so far, until a young woman moved into frame. Her face was completely blurred away by a jagged line of static interference, but from what I could see she was average height, thin and wore a white sundress with no shoes. She walked up and down the line of shooters before stopping at a particular man and grazing her hand against the back of his neck. He seemed to go into a daze before reloading his revolver and turning to each man and firing. Two men were taken down instantly, and all but one man ducked to hide, he immediately shot the first man but it didn't seem to faze him- He kept shooting until every single man there was lying on the floor bloody. Then afterwards, reloaded one round into his gun, held it to his head and pulled the trigger.

When it was over, the girl turned and casually strode out of view from the camera and disappeared.

"Holy crap." I said. "Is that Eve?"

"Yep-" Rufus answered. "In all her creepy goodness."

"What the hell did she do to that guy to make him start blowing everyone away?" Dean asked.

"Hell if I know." Bobby said. "But that ain't all- She's pulled this stunt in tree other places. A library, a sports bar and grocery store."

"What's the death toll?" Sam asked, rubbing his temples.

"So far. Twenty three. But somethin tells me she ain't done yet." Bobby closed the laptop. "Somethin fishy is goin on here, and not just with her using people to kill each other. From what I can tell so far- Rufus and I are the only ones not losing our minds. This whole town's gone loco."

"Example?" I asked.

"No one is cleanin up the bodies, for one-" He said sarcastically. "Cops ain't doin jack squat- People are just going on their merry way as if nothin's happened at all."

"What the hell..." Dean glanced out the window. "Then is it really a good idea to stick around?"

"No one's bothered us so far." Rufus answered. "We've kept ourselves hauled up here for practically two damn days."

"So, does anyone actually have some kind of plan?" Sam asked. "Or, are we just gonna sit around and get our asses kicked?"

"Seeing is that we have no way of icing Eve- I would say no." Dean answered in a true smart ass fashion.

"No offense." I said with a snort. "But, uh. What exactly are we doing here if there's absolutely no friggin plan?"

Bobby crossed his arms and sighed. "We got a message this morning- From one of Eves little monsters. She wants to talk to us, in particular-" He moved his eyes to Cas. "You."

"Me?" Cas seemed confused, and rightfully so. "Regarding what?"

"Don't know. But, we can't get outa town until we talk to her. She's got the exits barricaded. She let you guys in, but won't let ya out."

"Awesome. Thanks for the heads up, Bobby." Dean said, shaking his head.

"Sorry, but she didn't leave me much of a choice- It was either get you all here, or she slaughters this entire town."

Everyone looked to Cas, wondering if he had any idea why Eve would want to talk to him. He had his head slightly lowered, his mouth was cinched small and his face looked strained.

"Dude-" Dean said. "You look like you're constipated, what the hell?"

"My powers are gone." Cas replied, ignoring the jab.

"What do you mean you're powers are gone?" I asked.

"I don't know. It must be Eve- She must have the ability to block them."

"Great, so that means she wants us completely off our guard, and taking away any means of making a quick getaway."

"Where's this supposed to go down?" Dean asked. "When and where?"

Bobby sat down at the table. "After sunset, at a little diner down the road."

Well this was just peachy, but I couldn't exactly be surprised since this is what our lives consisted of. Lucifer, monsters blah blah blah. It wasn't pony rides and sunsets, but constant danger, fleeing for our lives and walking straight into traps. Heck, if something actually went our way for once I don't think either one of us would know what to do.

Since we had a few hours until sundown, the only thing we could do was hang out in Bobbys motel room and try to think of someway to get out of this mess in case it went to shit. We weren't stupid- Of course we knew this Eve was probably going to try and kill us, and seeing is that we didn't know how to kill _her_- And Cas couldn't exactly zap us out of here, we were basically sitting ducks. So really, the only thing we could hope to do if it came down to it, was run. Just get the eff out as fast as we could and keep running. Yeah, the towns exits were blocked, but... Ugh... One day- Just _one _day without almost dying was all I asked for. God, I had been dead once already and it was no party- It sucked ass, I didn't want to go back to that lonely box- And I didn't want my brothers and friends snuffed out either.

Once sunset came, and we packed up our crap to drive to the diner, I sat in the backseat and watched the streetlights trail by. No one spoke, because really- What was there to say? Goodbye? I hope Eve doesn't gnaw on our intestines? No, we could do nothing but drive. Bobby and Rufus followed behind in their car, Dean exceeded the speed limit just as he always did- And after pulling into the diners parking lot I think we all were feeling the last traces of lunch creep up our throats. Well, all but Cas- Who sat there stone faced and looking ready to bitch slap anything that stepped in front of him.

Dean and Sam got out first, just as they always did- And before I climbed out Cas grabbed my arm.

"Things are bound to go badly in there-" He said. "If that's the case, I've already spoken to Sam and Dean and informed them that they are to remain behind me at all times. I might not have my powers, but I don't believe Eve could kill me."

My eyes flinched to his hand that grasped my arm. "So you expect for us to stay behind you and let you take all the punches?"

"Basically, yes."

"Like hell we'll agree to that."

I gave him a sarcastic smirk and followed after my brothers, waiting by the front door until Bobby and Rufus caught up.

"Ok, so here we go-" Dean said, not looking thrilled with the situation. "Let's hope we don't get turned into dinner."

He pulled the door open, and a little gold bell jingled as we stepped inside.

The place was actually packed, the booths were full, as well as all but three seats at the bar. There was the typical 50's music playing from the jukebox in the corner, what sounded like Patsy Cline if my guess was right. Everything seemed pretty normal as everyone ate their meals and chatted amongst each other. And so far, I didn't see any freaky weirdos that could be Eve.

Dean and Sam exchanged glances before approaching the bar and sitting on two of the bar-stools. Since I was about ready to bounce out of my pants from nerves, I allowed Cas to take the third. Bobby, Rufus and I merely stood awkwardly behind them, and our odd behavior didn't seem to catch the attention of any patron there somehow. After a few eerie minutes a young brunette in a yellow waitress uniform approached and slid two plates in front of Sam and Dean.

"Uh, sorry- But we didn't order this."Dean said.

"I know-" She smiled. "It's on the house. I thought maybe you would be up for negotiating if you were distracted by stuffing your faces."

Well of course this cute little brunette was Eve, which wasn't what I was expecting. As soon as she made her presence known five men moved from the bar and to the door, locking it and then slamming shut the blinds. After we were barricaded inside she smiled yet again and let her eyes trail over each of us.

"Now. There's something very important we need to discuss. And I figured that it would be easier if you came to me instead of vice versa. And, considering that all of you are unarmed, at least in the sense that nothing can kill me, I don't think you have much choice but to at least hear me out."

We were silent for a moment before Dean shrugged. "Ok, I'll bite. What the hell is this about?"

"My children-" Her smile faded. "Are being tortured." Now she looked to Cas. "Of course I'm not happy about that, especially since they're being held somewhere that I can't find. I hear you're looking for Purgatory, is that right?"

I stiffly looked to Cas, whos posture was straight in the bar-stool. He didn't seem to be the slightest bit intimidated, but of course he didn't respond to her.

"If you think we know where your children are, then you're wrong." Sam spoke instead.

She snapped her head towards him. "You _do_ know. After all, before that wall was placed in your mind you were right there with your Grandfather herding my children like they were pieces of cattle. You might find this hard to believe, but I love every single one of them- And when they're in pain, so am I. As would be so with any good Mother."

"So you expect for us to... What? Find them and release them?" Sam shook his head. "Like I told you- I don't know where they're being held, at least I don't anymore."

"Then I expect you to find out-" She looked to Cas again. "And you- If you call off this little witch hunt on my babies then I might just be willing to tell you how to get into Purgatory."

"You can't do that." Dean quickly snapped.

"Don't tell me what I can or can't do. A Mother would do anything for her children, and if it means giving this angel with a god complex what he wants, then I will definitely do it. It doesn't concern me after all what he wants with those souls. And if telling him how to get into Purgatory will stop the tortures on my children, then I _will _do it."

"Stupid question-" Dean said. "But if we don't agree to this?"

She smirked slightly. "Then I'll kill you, all of you. And every town or city I come across."

"Even _if _I agreed to this-" Cas finally spoke. "I don't know the area in which they're being held- Only where Crowley takes them for interrogation."

"I know. That's where Sam and Dean come into the picture- Because like I've said- Sam has been there. I'm sure a little picking around that brain of his would eventually give us the location. It's really not that bad of a deal is it? Your friends get to live, and you get all of the souls from Purgatory." No one was budging, even Cas, which surprised me. "Do I have to give you a little motivation into accepting?"

Bobby inched his way closer to me, and I noticed his right hand slightly creeping towards the pistol stuffed in his jacket pocket.

"Which one of them..." She trailed off, moving her eyes from Sam, Dean, and eventually me. "Would hurt you the most if they died?"

Two men quickly approached and pulled guns from their jackets, one pointed it straight at my head, while the other at Deans.

Cas turned in his seat his eyes shifting all over the place, Sam jumped to his feet.

"Stop this!" Cas shouted.

"Only on one condition- _All _of you accept my offer, or their brains will be splattered on the floor in seconds."

Dean was seething, I could see that much- His fists were clenched to the point his knuckles turned white.

"Cas, Sam- Don't accept. It ain't worth it!" He said.

Sam was fumbling on his feet in a panic- And I didn't dare move even an inch to see how Bobby or Rufus might have been reacting. The only thing I could do was focus on the barrel of the gun that was pressed against my forehead.

"Well?" Eve sighed. "What's it going to be boys? Do you accept? Yes, or No?"

"No!" Dean shouted.

"Dean... They'll kill you. Both of you." Sam said.

Dean looked at my reflection from the wall length mirror in front of him- I could tell by the look in his eyes that he didn't want to say yes, and he was begging me to agree with him. But, of course he didn't want my brains blown out either. Well... I'd been dead before and yeah, I didn't much care for it- But if it would stop all of this at least I could relish in the fact that Dean could be brought back by Cas once it was over. Me? Well yeah I'd be flattened and I highly doubted Lee would be nice enough to send me back again. But I would deal with it. So, I nodded slightly to Dean that I did agree. But it didn't matter.

"Alright!" Cas said. "Make them lower their weapons. I'll do what you want!"

"Cas, no-" I said, ignoring the man with the gun. "Don't be an idiot."

He didn't look at me, and instead nodded to Eve. "You heard me. I'll do it."

"That's not good enough." She said. "All of you have to agree, because if you're not all in it together, then that means the other half will still be hunting me- And I can't have that." She nodded to the two men. "Shoot them."

"No!" Sam slammed his hands on the counter. "Don't kill them. We'll do what you ask."

Eve grinned. "Wonderful, so we're all on the same page then? Castiel will call off the hunt, and for good measure help you three search for the location where Crowley is holding my children? Afterwards, if all of my babies are safe-" She tilted her head slightly, eying Cas up and down. "I let all of you live, and you get your souls. Sounds like a pretty good deal... If you don't try to go back on your words."

"We won't." Cas said.

She waved her hand slightly and the two men backed off, lowering their guns.

"Good. In the mean time, I would like to be updated every now and then with your progress-" She moved from behind the counter. "Don't bother contacting me, you won't be able to. I'll come to you. And remember what I said, if you go back on your word then all of you die."

Dean could only glare at her in anger, now being backed into a corner. She disappeared soon after, as did her monsters in the diner and we were left alone.

"That went well." Bobby said sarcastically.

"At least we're alive." Dean sighed. "For the moment anyways. So how're we gonna weasel our way outa this one, huh?"

"We're not." Cas said. "You heard Eve- If we don't do as she says then all of you die. Which is a risk I'm not willing to take."

"Not your call, man." Dean shrugged. "Don't try to make it out that you're doin this to save our bacon- Because we all know you're only doin it to get those souls."

"That isn't true, Dean- I'm doing this to save all of you. Why can't you understand that?"

Sam shook his head and stepped in between them. "Guys. Can't we just get the hell outa here before we tare each other to shreds?"

It was disturbing to see Dean and Cas giving each other threatening death stares. Two people who had been best friends for a long ass time suddenly turning on each other? It was enough to drive you crazy. Thankfully though Dean turned and headed out of the diner before they could start pummeling each other, and I followed. We jumped back in the car and drove out of town- And didn't stop until we came across the next place that had a motel.

After a disgusting dinner of drive through burgers and greasy fries, Sam and Dean decided to turn in. Bobby and Rufus went on ahead without us, and after lingering by the door for nearly two hours Cas said he had to return to heaven, nodded a goodbye and poofed away.


	38. Chapter 38

My eyes shot open and I was covered in sweat, whatever I had been dreaming about had quickly faded from my mind as soon as I woke. Whatever it had been had my heart racing and not in a good way. I could still feel the thralls of terror coursing through my veins, but was unable to determine what it was that caused it, thankfully. I didn't dream much, and when I did it wasn't vivid- And it was an even more rare occurrence that I'd have an actual nightmare. Kind of strange considering all the crap we went through, you'd think monsters would be frequent visitors to each of us when we slept.

I sat up and wiped the sweat from my face with the sheet covering me, trying to calm myself down from whatever frightening thing I'd just witnessed subconsciously.

"What were you dreaming about?" Cas said, nearly making me wet the bed.

After nearly jumping clear out of my skin I let out a deep breath. "How long have you been back?"

"A few hours. Not long."

I looked over to the second bed, seeing Sam and Dean still sleeping soundly.

"Why are you back so soon? I thought heaven couldn't go without their Commander for very long?"

"Things are relatively peaceful at the moment, considering. At least enough for me to return here."

My head was pounding now, and I knew there wouldn't be a chance of getting anymore sleep. And after a quick glance a the clock noticing it nearly 4 a.m I knew that Sam and Dean would be awake in a couple hours anyhow. So I tossed the covers away and hobbled out of bed and to the nightstand where I'd left a glass of water. After chugging all of it down, Cas stepped away from the table he leaned against.

"We need to talk, Lara." He said.

"What about?" I sat down at the table and tried to shake my nerves away.

"With what happened today with Eve- It's become even more apparent to me that Sam or Dean will not accept what it is I'm doing."

"Really?" I arched a brow. "I thought you already knew that?"

"I did- But, I suppose I was hoping they would begin to see my side of this."

"Well, there's really no point in trying to sway me, Cas- As much as I hate to say it, I'm siding with my brothers on this one."

"I realize that. But, I thought maybe there might be a way for you to understand." He sighed, looking towards my sleeping brothers. "I assumed that if I simply told you that would you think I'm lying, just as Dean and Sam. So-"

"So?"

"There are things that you need to see for yourself so you can explain to them why I'm taking such drastic measures." He moved forward. "Do you object?"

"Uhh... To what? You're not making any sense?"

He held up both hands. "Just bare with me- It might be uncomfortable."

He didn't give me the chance to squeak out a response before leaning over and pressing his forehead against my own. Instantly it was like a flash of pictures, scenes and events flooding through my mind on fast speed. It was so fast I could feel myself getting dizzy and nauseous to the point I couldn't even hold myself up. He steadied me with his hand on the back of my neck and the scenes just kept coming until finally slowing down.

It was like watching a movie through someone elses eyes. I could see Dean fighting with Sam, but it clearly wasn't our brother. He pummeled Dean until his face was bloody and swollen, and then fast forward again as Sam was falling backwards into a deep dark abyss dragging Adam down with him. Fast forward again, I could see bodies scattered over the ground, the outline of black angel wings spread outwards from each man and woman. Fast forward a third time and it was Raphael.

"You heard me, Castiel-" He said, his voice chilling me to the bone. "Either bow before me, or I will lay you to waste. _I_ will be the new God- Lucifer and Michael _will _be released from their cage, the apocalypse will ensue just as prophecy foretold. Those that oppose me will be destroyed right along with you."

The last scene that shot through my mind was feeling myself being beaten to a pulp, only- It wasn't me, but Cas since it was his eyes I was seeing this through. Raphael definitely didn't spare any punches and by the time he finished Cas was lying face first on the ground spitting up mouth fulls of blood.

"Make your choice-" Raphael said. "Follow me, or die."

When Cas finally pulled away and let me have my own mind back the first thing I did was dart to the bathroom and puke into the toilet- Just barely missing the bowl. After heaving my guts up a good two times more, I flushed and hobbled to the sink.

I splashed water in my face and rinsed out my mouth, trying to steady my wobbly legs. When Cas appeared in the doorway I shook my head.

"Dude, what the hell was that?"

"I'm sorry. But it was imperative- I needed you to see for yourself just what I'm up against."

"But still-" I shuddered. "You could have given me a friggin warning before doing the Vulcan mind meld on me."

He scrunched his brows at that comment. "I don't understand that..."

"Never mind." I pushed myself away from the sink and returned to the room.

Sam and Dean were still out like a light, and obviously hadn't heard the commotion of my puke fest. I had a feeling that was Cas' doing, probably using his angel juju on them to keep them from waking up. I fell back on my bed, taking my head into my hands.

"So... That's what he plans to do, huh?" I asked. "He wants to let Lucifer and Michael out again?"

"Yes. He is _very _insistent on the apocalypse. I of course tried to explain to him that it wasn't necessary- But he doesn't see it that way. To him, I'm an angel that rebelled, one that needs to be taken out. Which is why I have to do whatever I can to stop him."

"What I don't understand is, is if he has the capability of smiting you whenever he wants, then why hasn't he done that already?" He went silent for a moment, which forced me to look at him. "Cas?"

"Crowley- He... _Assisted _me in making a very convincing threat towards Raphael."

"And he did that, how?"

"Souls from hell. Several thousand of them was enough to use to persuade Raphael into fleeing- But not enough to stop him from backing down."

"Just how many is several thousand?"

He looked away, clenching his jaw. "Fifty thousand."

"_Fifty_..." I jumped back to my feet, regretting doing so after another dizzy spell. "If fifty thousand souls were barely enough to scare the douche bag away then how many would it require to actually kill him?"

"As many as there are in Purgatory- Which, is why I hope you'll understand why I'm working with Crowley. It's not because I want to, but because it's the _only _way of stopping Raphael."

Yeah, sure I understood his motives. I didn't want the apocalypse to happen anymore than the next person. But still...

"Cas... You don't have any idea what would happen to you if you took in all those souls. You could friggin explode for all we know."

"Which is why I've been strengthening my vessel, and myself, by taking in souls that Crowley gives me."

I needed to sit again, this was too much to take in all at once.

"Why did you decide to swamp _me _with your memories. Wouldn't it have been better to do it to Dean since _he's _the one you're butting heads with?"

"There would have been no point. Dean's too stubborn, he wouldn't listen."

"And, what- You think he'll listen to me?"

"Yes."

I crossed my arms. "That's assuming _if _I'm on your side. Jumping a little ahead of yourself aren't you?"

He put his hands in his coat pockets. "_I_ followed you when you wanted to go through with the insane plan of reversing the spell and taking down Lucifer."

"Oh so you're gonna play like that, huh? Well, in case you don't remember, Cas- That little plan ended up getting me killed." I suddenly felt like ripping my hair out. "Ok, here's the thing. Yes, I agree with you that Raphael needs to be stopped. Obviously I don't want Lucifer let out of his cage again, I don't want there to be an apocalypse- But, that doesn't mean that I like the idea of you teaming up with Crowley and filling yourself up with monster souls from fucking Purgatory either."

He nodded. "You don't have to like it, I never asked you to. All I ask is for some support in this."

Ugh, it felt like my mind was playing tug of war with common sense with this one. Yes everything in me was saying that this was wrong and stupid, and to support him on such a dangerous endeavor was basically just letting him walk straight to his death. But, the part of me that had a soft spot for that stupid baby faced expression just wouldn't let me completely turn against him like Dean was content with doing. But also, I didn't want to go against my brothers either.

"All I'll say-" I finally replied. "Is that I'm not gonna fight with you on this. But, I'm also not gonna fight with Sam or Dean. Let's just say I have no opinion and that's it, I'm staying out of this mess."

"Well-" He sighed. "I suppose that's better than a complete disownment."

Was it? I honestly didn't know what to think anymore. No of course I didn't want him doing something so stupid, it went against everything that I stood for as a Hunter, as a person with an actual frickin brain, and as a human. You don't go and suck in all these evil things, you're supposed to kill them. No, nothing good was going to come from this.

* * *

I was running, that's the only thing that was completely certain- Running through a brown and dead forest, while something chased after me. I could hear panting from behind me, as whoever was pursuing me was gaining ground. Pure fear induced adrenaline somehow motivated my feet to move faster as I jumped over dips and broken tree limbs.

Suddenly, out of no where, the forest completely disappeared and I was now running across the root top of a five story building. Just as I reached the edge and nearly toppled over my eyes shot open.

For a moment I was thankful to realize that it was just another annoying nightmare, that is- Until I didn't see the ceiling of the skeezy motel room my brothers and I had slept in the night before. Nope, I was looking straight up at the bright sun filled sky.

I sat up, feeling my heart race, noticing I was lying on the very roof that I had been running on in my dream.

"Shit... What the hell?" I muttered, pulling myself to my feet.

After examining myself I was still wearing my so called "pajamas" from the night before. Which was a pair of overly large yoga pants, a plain white t-shirt, and no shoes or socks. First instincts were to check for my cell phone, but of course I didn't sleep with the damn thing so I didn't have it.

"Where the hell am I?"

The wind whipped around me from being so high from the ground, and I could hear cars buzzing by on the road below. I carefully inched my way to the edge, seeing a crowded city street.

Ok, someone was clearly fucking with me, or playing some kind of practical joke. How did I wake up on the roof I was dreaming about? This couldn't have been Cas' doing. He wasn't the type of dude to play jokes mainly because he just couldn't grasp the concept. And Sam or Dean didn't have the cojones to drag me out of my bed and leave me lying on a roof top. Not that they ever would think of it anyways because seriously, what kind of joke is that? Deans pranks were something immature like coating me in shaving cream, or switching the sugar for salt so I'd put salt on my cereal. Lame shit like that. And Sam? Well he mainly babied me like a normal big brother should.

I told myself not to panic, the first logical thing to do would be to climb down from the roof and try to figure out where the hell I was. So, that's what I did. I found a fire escape and started down the rusty ladder until coming to an alley filled with garbage and dumpsters. I cringed and hopped over puddles and crap until coming to the sidewalk.

It didn't take me long to begin to recognize the surrounding buildings and landmarks.

I was in Indianapolis.

Since I grew up just outside of the city, my foster parents would drive in every other weekend for what they called "family fun". It usually consisted of going to the movies or to an arcade, but never before was I so thankful for those frequent trips because at least I knew where the hell I was. Ok, so since that was established, now I needed to come in contact with my idiot brothers- Because I'm sure they were freaking out as much as I was right now.

So, my feet started moving and I dodged people left and right. While I knew I was in Indianapolis, I wasn't entirely certain of my exact location. When I came to a street corner and saw I was on "Monument Circle" I heaved out a relieved breath of air. Now, payphone, or some nice bystander that might be willing to lend me their cell. But, people in the city generally weren't very kind, especially to crazy looking girls with no shoes or socks and bed messed hair. I ended up wandering back and forth until finally coaxing a nice old woman into lending me change for a payphone.

I had to wait behind in line while a middle aged drunk man called for a cab, and after he finally left I jumped into the booth and slammed the door.

All I could say is that Dean better answer his damn phone, because I didn't want to have to wait around for some other person to take pity on me and lend me a frickin quarter. And after forcefully punching the buttons to the point it ached my fingertip, it started to ring. Three times, and then four...

"Oh my god, pick up the mother effing phone!" I shouted into the receiver.

"Yeah, hello?" Dean finally said.

"Yeah, so guess who?"

"Lara? What the hell? Where are you?"

"Indianapolis."

"Indian-" His words cut off. "What the hell?!" He repeated.

"Don't yell at me! I didn't do this. I woke up on a frickin rooftop, don't ask me how I got here!"

He obviously moved his phone away as he began mumbling curses.

"Ok, where you at exactly? Cas will come get you."

"Monument Circle."

He started talking to Cas in the background. "She's in Indianapolis on Monument Circle."

Literally a half a second later there was a knock on the payphone door. I glanced just long enough to see Cas standing there.

"He's here." Then I hanged up on him.

After pushing the payphone door open he didn't even give me a chance to say hey before zapping us back to the motel I had fallen asleep in.

Naturally as soon as my feet hit the floor Dean and Sam swarmed me like flies on dog crap.

"What happened?" Sammy asked, giving me a hug. "Are you ok?"

"Dude, I'm fine. And I don't know what the hell happened."

"You don't know?" Dean of course sounded skeptical. "You mean, you just woke up in Indianapolis?"

"Yeah, pretty much. On the roof of a five story building."

I flopped back on my bed, which covers were still in shambles. Everyone exchanged befuddled looks, because really- Who would know how the crap I ended up a gazillion states away?

"Cas?" Dean said. "You got any ideas on who coulda done this?"

He shook his head slightly. "No. I have no explanations."

"Could it have been Crowley?" Sam asked now.

"No, I very much doubt that Crowley would be ignorant enough to try and abduct her again."

"Then maybe douche bag Lee?" Dean offered now.

"Why would he do that?" I responded. "If he was gonna jet me somewhere, why would he just leave me lying on a rooftop?"

"I dunno, because he's a douche bag?" Dean shrugged.

"Yeah, a douche bag that resurrected me- I don't think it was him, Dean."

Everyone went silent, and I was struggling to believe that what happened was even real. It did seem like some kind of practical joke, but really who would do that? Everyone thought I was dead, the only people to know I was brought back were my brothers, Cas, Bobby and Rufus.

"I got nothin." Dean said, sitting beside me.

Cas walked over and pulled me up by the arm. "Perhaps there's something I can try."

He went silent as he merely stared down into my eyes while I stood there awkwardly. Sam and Dean tried to break the weird tension by clearing their throats. And for practically three entire minutes Cas stood there stiff as a board, barely two inches away from me.

"Are they makin out?" Dean whispered sarcastically. "I don't know how angels do it."

"Shut up." Sam retorted.

When Cas finally stepped back he shook his head. "I have no explanation. I suspected maybe a demon or another angel was responsible, but if that were so there would be some traces of either sulfur or a vibration left behind that I could detect. There's nothing."

"Awesome-" Dean stood. "So, now we have some mystery monster that's capable of swiping anyone of us and putting us on roofs?"

"Uhh-" I swallowed. "Well, the weird thing is. Is that before I woke up on that roof, I was dreaming about running across it... What does that mean?"

Yet again, everyone expected for our book of knowledge named Cas to have the answer. Which he didn't.

"I've never heard of anything like that before. Someone would have had to be controlling your dream state in order to achieve that."

"Well I _was_ being chased..." I shrugged.

"Chased? By who?" Sam asked.

"I don't know. I never saw him or her, but I was scared outa my mind as I ran... That's all I know."

"This is creepy-" Dean stated. "Friggin dreams are worse than reality."

"So, what are we supposed to do about this?" Sam sighed. "If Lara got beamed out, it could happen to us too. And, we wouldn't have any idea of when it would happen."

I was exhausted and just wanted to go back to sleep. It felt as though I hadn't gotten any rest at all the night before.

"Maybe we should start handcuffing ourselves to the bed-" I said, and immediately glared at Dean. "Shut up."

He frowned. "But I didn't..."

"You were thinking it."

He thought that over for a moment before shrugging and giving a smirk.

"As disturbing as this is-" Sam said. "I think we need to focus on what we're gonna do about Eve. Since we don't know how to kill her right now, we don't exactly have a choice but to do what she wants."

Dean nodded. "Yeah, well- Can't say I'm exactly thrilled with doin what the bitch wants- But we're stuck. So, where do we start?"

"I don't know. Yeah- I've been to the location where Samuel took the monsters, but..."

"There are multiple locations." Cas interrupted. "Crowleys safety net. He had a lingering suspicion that you would eventually try and foul up his plans for finding Purgatory."

"_His _plans?" Dean arched a brow.

"You seem to forget, Dean- That Crowley was the one to first approach me with this arrangement. Which means, yes- He had obviously planned ahead for something going wrong."

"Whatever-" I interrupted. "So, there's multiple locations where he's keeping Eves little monsters. How many is multiple?"

"At least three. Whether there is more than that- I have no idea."

"And you don't know where any of them are?" Sam asked.

Cas shook his head. "No. Crowley didn't trust me with their locations."

"So, Sam's been to one of them-" I went on. "But he doesn't remember where it is. Is there anyway you can find out where they're at, Cas?"

He nodded slightly. "It's a possibility. It would require, of course, finding a demon that is working for Crowley and interrogating him."

"Yeah, uh-" I sighed. "If that's gonna require going all torture master on someone, I think I'll sit that one out..." My eyes shifted from man to man. "Bad memories, ya know?"

Everyone went silent before Dean did his usual pouty lipped expression. "Yeah, don't worry about that, cupcake. We'll take care of it."

Not that it made me feel any better about the situation. Yeah, it was hard to take pity on demons or monsters, but still- I knew how good Crowley was at his job.

"Ok-" Sam sat down beside me, playfully nudging me to try and cheer me up. "So, now we just find a demon."

"Leave that to me." Cas said, then immediately fluttered away.


	39. Chapter 39

Three days passed since the strange incident with my waking on a random roof top. And thankfully it hadn't happened again. No one knew what to make of it still, obviously- And it seemed to sink to the back of everyones minds as we searched for the locations Crowley was keeping Eves monsters- And, also for a way to kill Eve. Which of course was a daunting task. There was no lore on "The Mother of All", nothing to be found what so ever on this creature. We weren't even entirely sure what she was. All we knew was that she was, so far, invincible and could do whatever the hell she wanted without worry.

So far in the three days that passed Castiel had returned with two demons, both of which weren't budging on any information. When the third demon came around, he was strapped to a chair in the center of a devils trap, just as the previous two had been.

I hadn't partaken in the torturing of course, not that it mattered- I could clearly hear the mans screams coming from Bobbys basement. Instead I sat at the kitchen table, staring blankly at Sams laptop screen with waves of nausea sweeping over me. Either there was something wrong with my dinner, or what was happening downstairs was affecting me more than I thought.

Trying to wash away the waves with a chug of cold coke, I choked afterwards as the liquid just wouldn't go down.

"Hey, you ok, kiddo?" Sam suddenly asked from the doorway.

"Y-yeah-" I wiped my mouth with my sleeve. "Just went down the wrong way." Or was that really it? "You guys almost done down there?"

"Yeah, we think so-" He gave a weak smile. "He's given us one location... And, according to what he says, it's the only one he knows about. Crowley has specific demons for each building. He only works in the one."

"Well, good news then I guess... So is he dead yet?"

He nodded. "Yeah, Cas finished him off."

"And the man he was possessing?"

"He'd been dead for a while, so..." He trailed off, sitting across from me at the table. "Why are you sitting in the dark?"

"My head was hurting, the lights were bothering me. Not that the bright laptop screen was helping with that much."

"It's late, you could get some sleep?"

"Nah. Maybe in a little while."

He grabbed himself a beer before Dean, Cas and Bobby returned upstairs. Dean stole Sams beer from him and chugged down nearly half and I tried to ignore the blood splatter on his shirt.

"We're gonna head out tomorrow night, better to do it by the cover and of darkness, ya know." Dean said. "It's too late to go tonight, everyone's spent." He then knelt over and looked at me closely. "Dude, you look like hell. You feelin ok?"

I nodded, closing the laptop. "Yeah, just tired and a headache- No big deal."

"Hit the hay, kid-" Bobby said. "We need you on your toes tomorrow."

"Maybe I will." I smiled to each of them and tried my best to keep my pace sturdy as I made it to the stairs.

As soon as I was out of site from each of them I had to stop and brace myself against the wall. I looked like hell? Well maybe that was because I felt like death warmed over. My heart was racing, my head pounding. It felt like the worlds worse hangover and I hadn't drank in days. I tried to shake it off as I laggardly started up the steps, into Bobbys spare bedroom and collapsed onto the bed and passed out.

* * *

I felt someone shaking me by the shoulders, lightly at first but then more fervently but my eyes just couldn't open.

"Lara-" I heard Cas' voice. "Dean said it's time to wake up."

Ugh, wake up? I had literally just lied down two seconds before hand why were they trying to drag me out of bed already?

"_Lara_." His tone turned more serious, as did his shaking.

"What the hell is wrong with her?" I heard Dean say. "Why won't she wake up?"

"She is breathing, right?" Sam asked- Both my brothers sounded panicked.

What the heck were these a-holes trying to do? Couldn't they take a hint that I wanted to sleep? Finally to stop the incessant shaking I opened my eyes and locked onto a face I didn't recognize.

I immediately sat up and let out a shriek waving my hands at this invader when after a few blinks the face disappeared and Cas' became more prominent.

"Dude..." Dean knelt over. "What's wrong?"

"I don't..." Was I crazy, or did I just see a completely foreign face staring back at me? "What's going on?"

"Uh, we've been trying to wake you for ten friggin minutes, sleeping beauty-" Dean replied. "You wouldn't budge."

I rubbed my eyes and tried to get the image of this face to go away, but it seemed to have been scorched into my retinas. No, it wasn't a horrible ghastly face, but it wasn't something I could explain either- Mainly because it was so bright, like somehow the sun was shining through it, but past that the eyes were glowing blue. What was even more freaky was it was Cas that that face was attached to.

"Lara, you ok?" Sam asked, shaking me lightly by the shoulder. "You were freakin out like you saw something?"

"Yeah, uh..." I trailed off, looking to Cas who looked just as startled as my brothers. "It's nothing, I guess I was just dreaming. What time is it?"

"Nearly 2:30. We thought you'd gone and died up here." Dean paused. "Maybe I should rephrase that."

"2:30? Damn- I haven't slept that late in years." I pushed the covers away. "Why didn't you wake me up sooner?"

"We tried." Cas answered. "Two hours ago."

Dean smacked me on the leg. "Rise and shine- We got shit to do before tonight. So get your butt downstairs."

I grumbled into my hands as everyone piled out of the room, all but Cas- Who was staring at me.

"What did you see when you woke?" He asked.

"Nothing- I was just dreaming."

"That wasn't the response of someone who was only dreaming, Lara. What did you see?"

Ugh why wouldn't this damn headache go away- It seemed to be getting worse and worse every second.

"I dunno. When I first opened my eyes and saw you standing over me, I didn't see your face. I saw something else."

"Such as?"

"Another face. It freaked me out of course because my dream mind was still messing with me."

He silenced, as his eyes drifted across the room. "What did this face look like?"

"Dude- I don't know, it was only for a split second." I stood. "Ok, uhh. It was bright, like sunlight practically, and the eyes were glowing."

"Blue?" He asked, his eyebrows scrunched.

My arms fell to my sides. "Uh, yeah. How'd you know that?"

Cas looked strange after that. No, not just strange- But if I were to guess I would say he seemed embarrassed. He actually fidgeted on his feet, and he looked ready to flee from the room.

"Were there any defining features?" He asked now.

This was getting annoying. I just wanted to take a damn shower and eat something, not be interrogated about a frickin hallucination caused by a stupid dream.

"I don't know, it was too fast. All I know is it wasn't like anything I've ever seen before." I shrugged. "Are you done grilling me? Or do you wanna follow me into the bathroom?"

For a second I thought he might just do that until he realized exactly what it was I said. Then of course, his face flushed red and he strode out of the room without another word said. Well, for future reference, if I ever needed to get rid of Cas in a hurry I would just threaten to flash him my boobs or something. It would scare him to the point of fleeing at a million miles an hour. For a moment I wasn't sure if I should take that as an insult... Hm...

Shaking it off, I took a quick shower, did my usual bathroom business and got dressed. Thankfully my headache was just a dull pulse in my temples now, and I figured after actually eating something it would be gone entirely. Even though my head wasn't going to explode any longer, didn't mean I felt better anywhere else. I ached, _everywhere_, like I had just run a frickin marathon or something. There wasn't one muscle that wasn't throbbing. Maybe I was coming down with the flu or something? Regardless, I knew that I would have to suck it up and pretend to be healthy in front of the boys- Because I didn't want to be left out of this new mission.

I was barely strong enough to hold my arms up to the point of tying my hair into a french braid, seriously every muscle felt like jello or mush- And as much as I tried to ignore the reflection staring back at me, there were dark circles blatantly appearing from under my eyes. What the hell?

Ok, so I always kept makeup in my bag just in case a job required it, so I grabbed a concealer stick and dabbed it under my eyes, secretly thanking makeup tutorials on YouTube for telling me how to apply it correctly. Yeah, it's sad- But I grew up as a Hunter not a super model so makeup and other girly things weren't exactly in my repertoire. But at least I could hide that there was clearly something going on with me by the way it was dancing across my face. As far as the sore muscles and aching body, well- That I would have to will away with some sort of inner strength that I hoped I possessed.

Once I was through I finally descended the stairs and entered the kitchen. The boys paid me no mind as Sam was preoccupied by his laptop and Dean was stuffing his face.

"Breakfast's on the stove." Dean said, his mouth full.

"Yeah, thanks... Where's Bobby?"

"Went out for supplies, he'll be back soon."

I approached the stove, seeing the usual breakfast of scrambled eggs and bacon. No, my stomach clearly didn't find that desirable but I needed to force down something. After getting myself a small helping I sat down and struggled to swallow the first bite.

"You on a diet or something?" Dean asked sarcastically.

"What?"

"Your plate. There's like two bites on there."

I stared down at it, then shrugged. "Just not that hungry I guess."

"You sure you're feelin ok?" Sam asked. "You look kinda pale."

Cas observed from the other side of the corner, seeming to eye me up and down. "Sam's right- You do seem pale."

Oh great, now the angel was gonna start diagnosing me?

"Guys, I'm fine. Really." As proof of that obvious lie, I shoved down every spec of food on my plate. "See, perfectly fine."

The food hadn't been in my stomach for two seconds before I could feel it rushing back up my esophagus. Like a fire was lit from under me I jumped up from my seat and darted up the stairs, barely making it to the bathroom in time to ralph it all back up. After the horrible ordeal was over, I tried not to glance at my breakfast that now floated in the toilet- But felt my heart skip when seeing mixed through the eggs and bacon was swirls of blood.

Dean started pounding on the door which I had locked, and quickly I slammed the lid down and flushed the evidence away.

"Lara!" He shouted, continuing to pound. "You ok?"

No, I wasn't- It was completely obvious now. This wasn't some little cold or flu.

I tried to garble out a response, but to my own mind it sounded like nothing more than slurs. I sunk back onto the floor, resting my head against the wall as the room started to spin around me. Before Dean kicked the door open, my blurry eyes caught site of the underside of my wrist. Either I was hallucinating again or my veins were glowing bright orange.

Once he kicked the door in I was all but completely blacked out- I barely heard a shuffle of several feet as each man crowded into the tiny bathroom and knelt around me.

"She's burning up." I heard Dean say. "We gotta get her to the hospital."

"Let me take her." Cas spoke now and I was unable to ignore how that was _not _a request.

He reached down to scoop me up, but even though he was gentle about it, it felt like a million tiny knives stabbing into me. I let out a loud cry afterwards, which resulted him halting his movements.

"I'm sorry." He said, his voice was laced with concern and confusion.

"Get her to the hospital, Cas-" Sam said. "We'll follow."

Cas repeated another apology for having to pick me up, which of course released another wave of knife stabbing pain. I couldn't help but sob into his shoulder, no matter how much of a wimp it made me look- And with a gust of wind and flutter we were at Sioux Falls hospital.


	40. Chapter 40

**_In answer to peoples questions as to what's going on with Lara- Well, you're just gonna have to wait and see (insert maniacal laughter) tehe._**

* * *

Sam and Dean rushed through the ERs sliding doors, finding Cas sitting awkwardly in the waiting area with a crowd of people. He stuck out like a sore thumb with this heavy trench coat and dark blue suit. When he spotted the boys he stood quickly and nodded.

"Well?" Dean asked. "Is she ok? What's goin on?"

"I haven't heard anything yet- She's only been back there for twenty minutes or so. Although, I did overhear a nurse claim that her fever was 104.3." Cas replied.

Sam shook his head. "Damn. What the hell is going on? She was fine yesterday."

Castiel had no answer, and for the next hour they paced across the waiting room. Bobby had ran in twenty minutes before hand after a phone call from Dean, and the only thing they could do was sit and wait. After another grueling hour a Doctor finally came into the room, peered around at who was there and said.

"Lara Winchesters family?"

Dean was the first to rush up, followed by the rest.

"Yeah, that's us-" He said. "Is she ok?"

The Doctors face wasn't at all pleasing. "I'm sorry to say that she's slipped into a coma. We've run all tests available, along with a MRI and ct-scan, and while there is still signs of brain activity, we have no explanation so far as to what's caused this. Her fever has gone down, and really at this point the only thing we can do is keep her comfortable."

Deans face went blank, while Sam seemed to be the only one able to form words.

"You have no idea what's causing this?" He clenched his fists. "There's gotta be some explanation."

"I realize your frustration, and like I said- We're doing all we can. I wish I had more to tell you but I'm sorry to say that we just don't know what's causing this."

"She'll pull through though... Right?" Dean asked.

"At this point we can't say for certain. It really all depends on whether or not she comes out of this coma, but since we aren't even sure what's caused her to slip into that coma in the first place- We don't know where to begin to treat her. As I stated, right now the only thing we can do is keep her comfortable, and keep her fever down."

Deans eyes fell to the floor, while Sam looked ready to punch the Doctor in the face. Bobby lied his hand on Deans shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"Can we see her?" Cas asked, before either of the boys could.

"She's being moved to the fourth floor, you can head on up and wait for her- Talk to someone at the nurses station and they'll show you to her." The doctor gave a kind smile that couldn't have been more fake. "Yet again, I'm sorry- And we're doing everything we can."

He walked away and Dean shook his head. "Fucking quacks. They don't know jack shit in this slaughter house."

"Calm down, Dean." Sam said. "Yeah I'm just as pissed as you, but we can't freak out around her- You never know, she might be able to hear us."

Dean cursed his way to the elevators and they rode to the fourth floor and finally found someone willing to help them. When they came to Laras room Dean pushed his way in first, practically shoving Castiel into the door frame.

Lara thankfully wasn't hooked up to any life support- She was breathing on her own, with the usual cannula sitting awkwardly halfway out of her nose. Everyones first thoughts was she just looked like she was sleeping. She didn't look sick anymore. Before she had been pale, now the color had returned to her cheeks, the only issue was of course she just wasn't waking up.

Dean grabbed her hand and gave it a tug.

"You listen to me-" He said. "Don't you go dying on us again, you hear? You better wake up, or I swear I'll kick your ass."

No response, not even so much as a blip on her heart monitor showing that she could hear them.

"We need to figure out what's happening." Sam said. "I think we all need to take into consideration that what's wrong with Lara isn't exactly physical."

"What?" Dean glared at him. "You saying it's what, mental?"

Sam let out a throaty sigh. "No. I mean, think about it. She was fine up until we met with Eve, the night after that she suddenly vanishes from our hotel room and shows up in a state practically halfway across the country. I think we need to consider that maybe something happened during that meeting. Something that's not natural."

Deans eyes fell back onto Laras still face. "Maybe Eve infected her with something. Something that won't show up on some stupid test."

"Or turned her _into _something." Bobby said, receiving a horrified expression from Dean and Cas. "I know, it's terrible of me to think it, let alone say it- But Eve's capable of somethin like that, hell- She's been doin it all over the damned country. I think we need to start runnin some tests of our own here, boys."

Sam went to the door and pushed it closed, giving a nod to Bobby as he approached the bed.

"Now wait a second-" Dean objected. "You can't just go slicing her up in a friggin hospital."

"You got another way of knowin?" Bobby defended. "Look, I don't like it anymore then you do, but it's gotta be done. We need to know if Eve did something."

Dean couldn't object no matter how much he wanted to, and Castiel was simply stunned into silence. So Dean took a step back and watched as Bobby sifted through the backpack he carried inside with him, pulling out silver, iron, everything that they could think of. And after slicing into areas they hoped the medical staff wouldn't notice- Bobby let out a sigh and shook his head.

"Nothin-" He said. "Nothin out of the ordinary. At least not yet. But there ain't no way of knowin whether or not Eve did something to her."

Dean was relieved for the most part- At least in the sense that Lara hadn't been turned into some new monster baby. But, there was still the uncertainty of what had caused her to become inexplicably ill in the first place. Sam was right, it was a little too coincidental that she was perfectly well up until the night they met with Eve. That night was the first time something went screwy. She disappeared from their motel room, landing on a rooftop that she had been dreaming about? Yeah, something was definitely up but neither man had the answers.

"Dean-" Bobby interrupted his thoughts. "Ya know I hate to bring this up now, but- We gotta job to do, remember? We gotta get to that building where Eves children are being held."

Dean glared at him. "What are we supposed to do? Just leave her here and go on a monster rescue mission?"

"I could stay with her, Dean." Cas volunteered.

Sighing deeply, Dean hated the thought of leaving her behind- Especially since there was no way of knowing if she would even make it through the night. But, they had a deadline so to speak. Eve wasn't exactly patient and she wouldn't give two craps if their sister was lied up in some hospital. If they didn't start rescuing her children, then she would start killing- And soon.

"Ok." Dean relented, and not happily. "But if there is any change what so ever- Even if she sneezes, or coughs, or just twitches a damn finger, you call me. Got it?"

Cas nodded. "Of course."

Sammy knelt over her bed and childishly mussed her hair.

"Get some rest, kiddo. We'll be back before you know it." He said.

Dean scowled his way to the door, and once all three men were gone Cas let out a quiet sigh and awkwardly took a seat in the recliner beside her bed.

Hours went by and even to an angel who was accustomed to such long passages of time, it still felt agonizingly slow. She of course hadn't woken up, not so much as even flinched. Nurses came in frequently to check her temperature and give her the proper medication after they announced her fever had returned with a vengeance.

Cas could only watch helplessly, feeling more useless and pathetic than ever before. How simple it would have been to cure Sam or Dean of such an ailment, but with Lara it was impossible. Often at times he was tempted to remove the spell from her himself just so he could rest assured that she would be safe.

It was late into the night when he finally pulled himself out of the recliner and stiffly moved towards the edge of her bed. For a moment he could have swore her eyes shifted from beneath her lids, but even he was beginning to question whether or not the stress of the job was making him hallucinate.

He wasn't startled or surprised at all when he heard a flutter of wings from behind him. And with a quick glance over his shoulder he let out a sigh.

"Rachel-" He said dully. "Why are you here?"

The blonde woman stepped forward, and it was obvious by her expression that she wasn't pleased with the situation.

"Castiel, you are needed back home. You've been gone for so many days and your soldiers need their Commander."

Cas barely flinched. "Unless there's some sort of battle I must remain here."

"Why? For the Winchesters? For this girl? You're needed back home- Our brothers and sisters are dying by the hands of Raphael and you swore to us that you would assist us!"

"That's what I'm doing." His tone was gravelly.

"Really?" She scoffed. "Because what it seems to me is that you're standing back and allowing your kin to fight and die, while you pine over some stupid little human female!"

Cas said nothing to that, only squared his jaw.

"Is she really worth it, Castiel? Is sitting here at her side really worth the deaths of your siblings?" When he didn't answer, she shook her head. "She should have never been brought back. She should have been left to rot in her grave- She's going to cause you nothing but hardships."

"Leave _now_, Rachel." He said. "I'll come when I can."

He heard her let out a snicker that wasn't caused by sheer amusement.

"I pity you, brother. You're risking everything just for humans who will only die in decades."

A flutter of wings and deadening silence told him she had finally gone. And finally after several long minutes of merely standing by the bed he reached over and lied his hand on Laras.

The gesture didn't last long before his cell phone began to vibrate inside his pocket. At a quick glance he noticed it was from Dean, and stepped into the hallway to answer.

* * *

Naturally when my eyes opened and I noticed I was lying in a hospital bed I was confused. I barely remembered how I even got there. Or why. I knew I had been sick and puked up my breakfast, but surely that wasn't reason enough to stick me in the hospital? Was it?

I glanced around me, noticing the room empty but Cas was standing in the hallway on his phone.

The hell? I thought- What was going on? I felt perfectly well now. No more nausea no more headache. It was as though I had gotten a good nights rest and it fixed whatever sort of problem I might have had.

Since Cas was on the phone I pushed the covers off, ripped the IV out of my hand and waltzed to the bathroom. There was no sense bugging him, because I had a feeling he was probably talking to Dean- And interrupting their conversations, I had learned, was a stupid thing to do. It only resulted in me getting bitch slapped by dirty looks, and yeah, it just wasn't worth it.

Seeing is that my brothers and Bobby weren't here at the hospital- I had a feeling that they had went on without Cas and I to wherever the location was where Eves monsters were being held. I was pissed, and since I was feeling as spry as ever now- I wanted to wash up, change into my own clothes instead of these unflattering hospital rags, and get my ass out there to help. Thankfully it was Cas that stayed behind with me, because he could easily zap us right into their car as they drove.

I turned on the faucet and splashed some water in my face, then took a glance at my reflection. Yeah, I was relieved to see the dark circles under my eyes were gone, the color returned to my cheeks. I looked as normal as I did every other day.

Suddenly the door flew open and Cas stood there staring at me.

"Dude-" I said. "Ever heard of knocking?"

He eyed me up and down a few times over, and I tried to understand why he looked so surprised.

"Lara..."

I sarcastically glanced around the bathroom. "Uh, yeah? Who did you expect would be in here?"

His eyes got all shifty, the expression his face held was hilarious- Like I had suddenly morphed into some ridiculous creature that he couldn't explain.

"How are you in here?" He asked.

A snicker escaped my throat. "Um. I got up and walked in here? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"You woke up."

Seriously, what the hell? "That's right. I woke up, _got _up, and walked to the bathroom. That's generally what someone does after they've been asleep."

I wiped my face with a paper towel and stepped out of the bathroom.

"You weren't asleep, Lara-" He replied. "You were in a coma."

My feet skidded to a stop. "Huh?"

"You were running an unusually high fever, and I brought you here to the hospital. The Doctor claimed you had slipped into a coma."

Was this some kind of a joke? Judging by his expression, and the fact that Cas didn't know how to form an actual joke, I would say no.

"What?"

He nodded. "You've been in a coma for at least eight hours."

"But... I feel fine? Perfect, actually." He shifted on his feet before pulling his phone from his coat. "You calling Dean?"

"Yes. He's _obviously _going to want to know about this."

He stepped into the hallway and I sat down on the edge of my bed. Had I really been in a coma? It seemed too absurd to actually be true. Mainly because I felt so good now. I could run friggin laps around this damned hospital and not even get winded. Seriously, a coma? Either the Doctors in this hospital were as dumb as a box of rocks, or I miraculously healed. And of course the second option just wasn't in the cards, which meant that the Doctors had obviously made a mistake. After all, a person doesn't just slip into a coma for no reason at all, and then a few hours later dance their way to the bathroom like nothing was wrong.

A few minutes later a nurse came in, noticed me awake and looked about ready to crap her pants. She told me not to budge, scolded me for ripping out my IV and rushed back out to find the Doctor. When Cas returned to the room after his phone call, he was immediately rushed back out when I was flooded with nurses and other staff that were looking at me like a medical wonder. Who I assumed was my Doctor could only stare at me, perplexed- With no explanation as to how I was awake and every sign of illness had vanished. They drew blood for more tests, insisted that I have another MRI and ct-scan, which I quickly refused. After arguing with them for a good fifteen minutes they finally decided to give up- Because really, they couldn't force me to do something I didn't want- And after a shouting match between me and a nurse who wanted me to lie down and get more rest, she left the room in tears and Cas was finally allowed back inside.

"Where's Sam and Dean?" I asked, climbing out of bed again.

"They've went on ahead to the location. It's in Washington so it will be a long drive."

I nodded. "Alright, good. That gives me enough time to go grab something to eat from the cafeteria."

He tried to argue with me, but I wasn't having any of that- I was sick of being treated like an invalid when it was apparent I was well enough to bitch slap or gank any monster. So, he followed me as I was clad in only a pair of baggy pale gray pants, a scratchy white tank top and bare feet, to the elevators.

Since it was late at night the cafeteria was closed, but the vending machines were available. A bag of chips, a coke and a stale container of microwavable top ramen was my dinner. But honestly, right at that moment it tasted incredible. It felt like I hadn't eaten in weeks, and I was just thankful I was able to keep it down. As I slurped down spoon full after spoon full of noodles, Cas sat across from me at the flimsy plastic table, refusing to take his eyes off me.

"Why are you staring at me like I've got something on my face?" I asked.

"I'm only trying to understand what's happening."

"What you mean?"

"Your sudden illness. Tell me, before you became unconscious, what were you feeling?"

I thought for a moment, shoving another heaping bite of noodles in my mouth. "I dunno. Sick as crap. My stomach was rolling and my head felt like it was gonna explode. And every muscle ached like I had been beaten with a sledge hammer. Oh, and... There was blood in my vomit... Tasty, huh?"

His head tilted at my sarcasm. "I don't understand how you can take it all so lightly."

I shrugged. "Well, I'm clearly not dead. And, whatever it was must have just been a twenty four hour thing cause I'm fine now."

He sighed and let his gazes drift off to the large empty cafeteria. Of course I left out what I thought I saw before I blacked out- And that was the veins on the underside of my arm glowing orange. Since I had such a high fever there was every probability that I was just hallucinating. Still, just in case, I didn't want to tell Cas about it- Because he would do his little freak out, tell Sam and Dean, and then I would be locked away somewhere because clearly, there was something goin on with me that wasn't normal. Yeah it worried me about what it could be, and first thoughts went to meeting with Eve and wondering if she somehow infected me with something. But, since there was no way of knowing about it right now- I couldn't let it take over my thoughts.

After slurping down my last traces of noodles I tossed my crap into the trash can.

"Ok, so. I need clothes, and shoes- And my gear. Because you're gonna zap us to where ever the hell Sam and Dean are." I said.

He just barely shook his head and rolled his eyes at me. "Lara. Not twenty minutes ago you were on the brink of death..."

"Oh, don't be so dramatic. It's possible for a Doctor to misdiagnose a patient, ya know? And besides, Sam and Dean can't tackle a friggin building full of demons and monsters alone. They're gonna need us both there." He glared at me with his mouth cinched and I only smiled. "Please?"

He pushed himself away from the table. "You can be infuriating at times."

"I know." I continued to smile.

After another sigh he lied his hand on my shoulder and we zapped from the hospital and back to Bobbys- Where I changed clothes, grabbed my weapons and anything else I might need.


	41. Chapter 41

After a phone call to Dean asking where he was at, Cas zapped us to the car and I was in my usual seat in the back.

"Hey guys." I said, which immediately forced Sam and Dean to both jump.

Dean jerked the steering wheel which sent me crashing into Cas.

"God, jumpy much?" I asked sarcastically.

"Dude- What the hell are you doing here?" Dean asked, glaring at Cas. "I thought I told you to stay put."

"And_ I _told him that you guys were gonna need backup. And since I'm fine now, here we are." I sneered.

Sam shifted in his seat and looked me up and down. "You feelin ok now?"

"Perfect. Wonderful. Seriously, I'm not on the _brink _of _death_-" I cast a crooked smile in Cas' direction which he promptly ignored. "So, how far are we from the building?"

"Nine hours in-" Dean answered, grumbling under his breath. "Another ten to go if we don't stop every ten seconds for you to go tinkle."

"Yeah, like you do that ever anyways-" I flippantly replied. "So we're just driving straight through? Is that really wise? Don't you think it would be better if you stopped, got some rest- And started off again tomorrow. You don't wanna be fighting exhaustion when we get to that building."

Judging by an "I told you so" expression Sam gave Dean, something told me they had been arguing about that very thing before I zapped into the car.

"Yeah, we're not stopping-" Dean replied finally. "I wanna get this over with."

Alrighty then- There was no stopping Dean when he was in one of his moods, so I sat back and made myself comfortable, attempting to mentally prepare myself for what was coming.

When we arrived on the outskirts of Seattle, where the building was located- We camped out in the car for hours until dark just observing from afar. And even though no one spoke it, I'm sure we were all thinking the very same thing...

This building was surprisingly quiet for a place that was supposed to be crawling with demons.

"Are you sure this is it?" I asked, leaning forward in the seat to rest on the front.

"Supposed to be. Of course, the demon could have been lying." Sam answered.

"Seeing is that it was a demon, that ain't a surprise." Dean scowled. "Please don't tell me we've came all this way for nothing?"

"We haven't." Cas said, he had been silent for the better part of an hour. "I can sense there's Enochian sigils blocking me from entering the premises."

"Still no signs of demons though." Sam replied. "Maybe they knew we'd be coming and took off?"

"And lugged all of those monsters with them?" Dean rolled his eyes. "I doubt that."

"So are we just gonna sit here all night and expect the demons to come to us?" I sat back. "Or are we goin in?"

"Kinda impatient aren't you, princess?" Dean glared at me from the rear view mirror. "You itching to get your ass killed again?"

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, butt-hole. But really, what did you expect for me to do? Come all this way and then wait in the car like a poodle?"

"Hey-" He turned in the drivers seat. "You were sick and practically dead not 24 hours ago, call me crazy but I don't exactly wanna risk you goin in there."

Now Sam and Cas gave me the same looks as Dean, and I was suddenly very self conscious for no reason what so ever.

"Dean. I'm not sick anymore. I'm fine, what do I have to do to prove it?"

"Yeah and how'd that happened, huh?" Dean shrugged. "You just magically wake out of a coma all fine and dandy? Shit like that doesn't happen out of the blue."

"And you think I'm responsible for that?" I chuckled. "I'm not. I can't explain it either!"

"What Dean is meaning to say-" Sam interrupted. "Is that he's worried maybe something happened to you with Eve. And, because of that he's not overly eager for you to go running straight into a building filled with demons and monsters. You never know when you could relapse."

I stared at each of them, obviously angry. If I didn't know any better it's as though they thought I was changing into some kind of monster. Well, as far as I was concerned I'd had enough of this conversation, so I pushed my door open and grabbed my bag that was lying on the floor of the car.

"Hey!" Dean shouted after me.

Ignoring him I started towards the building. If they weren't gonna get their asses out of the car and start this shit then I was going to. Fuck strategy right now, there really was no strategic way of going about this. Either we find a way to get in, or we don't and Eve starts killing. And I wasn't about to be left in the car just because I happened to be sick the day before. Yeah, it was freakin me out as to why that actually happened, but I couldn't sit and dwell on it because there was work to do.

Their footsteps eventually galloped behind me and someone caught me around the waist from behind. Judging by how high I was lifted from the ground, I knew it was Sam.

"What the hell are you doing?" He said, dragging me back to a set of thick bushes just out of site from the building. "Are you crazy?"

Dean yanked my bag out of my hands and tried his best to tower over me.

"Stop trying to get yourself killed a second time." He jerked me by the arm. "You've already died once, comon- Don't go ditching us again."

My brows furrowed, confusion sweeping over me. Ok, maybe they weren't being big dumb jerks, they just didn't want me dying and leaving them again. I just always assumed it was Sam and Dean party of two til the end, yeah I was their sister and they might have cared about me- But seriously, they were glued at the hips and there really wasn't room for anyone else. Or, maybe I was wrong... I didn't know anymore.

"Now, if you're really gonna insist on goin in there with us-" Deans tone softened. "Then at least let us form out some kinda plan, ok?"

I could only nod slightly in answer, as he handed me back my weapons. So as we awkwardly hovered in the bushes it was decided that since Cas couldn't get in because of those sigils, then we were going to have to destroy them. He said they would be in four corners of the building, north, south, east and west obviously- And described what they would look like, which to me they seemed to be a childs pathetic doodle of half a star. Sam and I were going in to take out the sigils, while Cas and Dean covered the outside. Naturally Dean wasn't happy about letting Sam and I go in alone, but I think he was starting to realize by now that he couldn't keep babying me as if I was an infant. Whether he liked it or not, I could do the same amount of crap that they could. Besides, two people sneaking around was a lot easier to hide than three.

Since the building was so quiet, we weren't certain of what we would find inside. For all we knew the place could have been abandoned ages ago- But just in case we weren't gonna run in guns blazing, instead we found a halfway busted window and were going to try that. Before Sam could boost me inside, Cas held out his angel blade.

"Remember, it also kills demons." He said, lying the hilt in my palm. "Be careful."

"What about you guys?" I asked.

"We're covered." Dean smiled and held open his jacket, showing me that he as well had an angel blade. Cas of course technically didn't need it since he had angel _mojo_.

Sam had his magic knife, so that meant all that was left was to get inside. He boosted me up so I could peak in, and the room inside was empty but for busted tables and chairs.

"All clear." I whispered and he held me up until I climbed through.

I carefully climbed to the floor, avoiding broken glass and other things that could blow our cover- As Sam lugged his enormous self up next. Once we were in he led the way to the door which was halfway hanging open. He had his knife at the ready, his gun in his belt- And a flask of holy water in his pocket. Just as I did. He peered out into a dimly lit hallway and motioned silently for me to follow stating the way was clear.

Once entering the hallway I could see it lined with thick metal doors, blank but for a tiny barred window at the top. Sam quietly sneaked his way towards one, taking a look inside and then shaking his head.

It was empty.

Moving on down the line the next door I checked, noticing the walls blanketed in blood, as a man, or woman, I couldn't tell which- Was chained to the wall.

_One _I mouthed, and Sam nodded. For the moment we couldn't spring any of the monsters because there had to be some sort of guards patrolling the building. The first thing we were to do anyhow was find the sigils and destroy them. So Sam started down the hallway again and we eventually came to a sharp left which led to a wide open room.

We stayed close to the walls, making sure to watch our feet and not make a sound as we approached the room. It was empty, but there was the remnants of a recent torture victim laying in pieces all over the floor- What appeared to be filleted skin fragments, fingers and even a severed arm. The floor was coated in blood splatters as a metal table fixed with chain restraints sat empty.

Sam actually seemed disturbed by the scene, and rightfully so. It was hell on earth in this building and I actually felt sorry for the creatures that had to endure the tortures. Even though I needed to keep my mind on the mission, the only thing I could think about was Castiel having a part in all of this. It broke my heart, and I couldn't understand how he could actually sink to such a low level. I mean, my god, he was an angel- Yeah, maybe not a text book angel since he had rebelled and decided that we were his family now, but still- The entire time I had known him he had been nothing but kind and helpful. And just staring at the blood and gore surrounding me made me realize that even someone, an angel at that, could actually snap.

We made our way through the torture room and to another hallway which as well, was lined with iron doors. Damn, exactly how many cells was in this pit anyhow? Hundreds? There had to have been since there was more than three levels. But, so far, there wasn't any sign of demons. That is, until we reached the end of that second hall and Sam suddenly grabbed me and shoved me into a partially open door.

It was an empty cell we hid inside, and footsteps grew nearer as a man slowly started to walk past. Sam quickly pulled the door open, grabbing the man and shoving his hand over his mouth as his knife was plunged into his chest. He tried to squeal out in pain, but it was muffled and hushed. As soon as the demon was dead I helped Sam pull his body into the cell.

Once again quiet, we left the cell and started down the hallway again, finally noticing one of the sigils at the end on the wall. It was written in bright red paint and as we rushed to it and Sam pulled a can of his own red spray paint out, I watched the way as he crossed it out with a large X.

He nudged me when he was finished, pointing in the opposite direction which was west, to find the next sigil. Castiel had stated that if we could at least mark out two of them he could be able to enter the building, but his powers would be extremely limited. But it was still better than nothing.

Unfortunately things went from bad to much much worse within a matter of seconds. I'm not even sure how it happened but we were suddenly swarmed with a group of demons. Sam and I stayed together as we tried to fight them off, and were actually doing a pretty damn good job of it until there was only two of them left. I took out the one closest to me, assuming that with a swipe of Sammys knife the last would be dead as well. But, when I heard a grunt from behind me, noticing that it came from my brother- I pulled my knife free from the demon I had just killed and rushed to his aid.

He was bleeding from his ribcage, an obvious stab wound was gaping at me from the tare in his shirt. I jammed the angel blade into the remaining mans neck, he fell to the ground with a gurgle and crunch. After which I struggled to catch Sam before he could collapse.

"Hold on, Sammy." I said, trying my best to help him walk away from the scene and to an area that was quiet. "Just hang on."

"You gotta find the last sigil, Lara-" He grunted in pain after that statement.

I ignored that, finally finding an empty cell which I led him in to. After sitting him on the ground I shoved his jacket aside and strained to see his injury in the dim light. It was bleeding pretty damn bad, enough that I knew it wasn't just a little scratch. So I quickly tore off my own jacket, wadded it into a ball and pressed it there tightly.

"Lara-" Somehow he kept a stern voice. "We have to get that second sigil, or else we're screwed."

"I'm not leaving you alone."

"I know..." He let out a deep breath. "We... We'll go together."

No sooner had he uttered that and tried to stand, did he collapse back to the floor and start to black out. Ok, yeah, he was losing a lot of blood. More than I could handle and of course I was beginning to panic. No, I didn't want to leave Sam alone in there, but I also knew that if I didn't find that second sigil and cross it out then we would be sitting ducks in here because Cas couldn't get in, and Dean wouldn't know which way to go once he entered to find us. So I tied my jacket around him as tightly as possible, hoping it would be enough pressure to slow the bleeding long enough for me to find that sigil, and Cas could get his butt in here and heal him.

"Just wait here." I whispered, but he had already passed out.

I scooped up my angel blade and checked the hallway, seeing it still quiet- So I slipped out and closed the cell door behind me, hoping that no demons would wander their way past and discover him.

I kept going in the direction Sam had told me, which was the west side of the massive building, running into two men who clearly wanted to knock my head off. Somehow I managed to take them down, only receiving a small gash on my left upper arm- Before finding the sigil which shone at me like a freakin beacon in the night. I ripped out my spray paint and started crossing it out, just finishing with the last line when I was tackled and knocked to the floor.

The can flew one way, my angel blade flew the other as the demon on top of me immediately wrapped his hands around my throat and started squeezing. And, it wasn't exactly easy overpowering a demon when you had no weapon. They had unnatural strength at times, and even though I didn't like to admit it, I was a girl and wasn't exactly rippling over with muscles. Basically, I was stuck under this guy as he tried to strangle the life out of me. My hands flailed upwards towards his face as my fingernails dug into his skin, but it didn't affect him in the slightest. Just as my eyes began to go dark the demons face suddenly lit up with white light, as it poured out from his eyes and mouth with a loud shriek.

Once his corpse fell sideways to the ground, I sucked in as much air as possible, trying to work the feeling back in my limbs.

Cas knelt down beside me helped me sit up. I was still dizzy from almost being strangled to death, and he grabbed my chin and examined me closely.

"Are you hurt?" He asked.

I shook my head. "Just seeing stars at the moment, but I'm ok."

"Your arm is bleeding."

"Just a scratch- We gotta get to Sam." I pulled myself to my feet. "He's hurt, really badly."

I dragged him by the hand down the hallway to the cell where I left him- Pulling the door open. Thankfully he was still there, and still alive as Cas rushed to him and immediately touched his fingertips to his forehead and the wound healed. Sam took in a deep breath, waking instantly- His eyes darting around the tiny cell in a momentary lapse of confusion.

"Where's Dean?" I asked now.

No sooner had I asked that did he come jogging down the hallway, his own knife bloody.

"Cas, Dude- What the hell. Thanks for ditching me back there." He said.

"He was saving both our asses." I spat. "I was being strangled and Sam was bleeding to death."

When Sam stood I instantly gave him a tight hug.

"You two good?" Dean asked, eying us both closely.

"Yeah, let's just get this over with." Sam answered.

I'll definitely say it was much more reassuring moving through this place with all of us together. We couldn't be taken by surprise anymore with so many eyes darting every which way. And after what felt like hours of clearing this place of demons, Dean stopped and cleaned off his knife.

"Ok, so how are we gonna do this, huh?" He eyed each of us. "Are we just gonna open the doors and hope they make it out alright?"

"Well I highly doubt that Eve expects for us to drop each and every one of them off on her doorstep. Just as long as we set them loose, they should be on their own as far as escaping goes." I said.

"Yeah, I agree." Sam said. "I'm ready to get the hell outa here."

"It could be dangerous though-" Cas said. "To release so many creatures at once. Perhaps it would be best if the three of you left and I released them?"

Deans jaw clenched, and he shook his head. "Nah, I think it's a good idea if we stuck together for this one."

"Why?" Cas tilted his head.

"Because, I don't believe that you'll let em go. I think you'll somehow call Crowley, let him know what's goin on- And we'll be stuck with the same situation all over again."

Sam and I watched the scene, both expecting for them to start throwing punches at each other.

"Dean-" Cas' voice was deeper, more rough. "I agreed to do what Eve asks to ensure that none of you were harmed. Which means, I'm going to whatever I can to keep up my end of the bargain."

"Right-" Dean rolled his eyes. "We all know your real reasons for agreeing to this. Your grand prize at the end is the entrance to Purgatory and all them tasty souls."

"Dean-" I tugged on his arm. "Not now, please. Can we at least just go."

"Sorry, cupcake. But we don't have a way to kill Eve yet, which means I gotta see that this job gets done. And I just don't trust you anymore Cas- At least not with this."

Cas' face went completely blank, his eyes shifted to me as if he expected me to somehow defend him. Which of course I couldn't do. Yeah, I might have said that I had no opinion on what he was doing- But after seeing this slaughter house, I couldn't exactly believe that anymore. Yes, as much as it pained me to stand there and not speak a word, especially when the disappointment shone from his eyes to the point it smacked me in the face- I just couldn't back him up.

He nodded after that. "Fine. What's your plan?"

"Sammy and Lara are gonna get the hell outa here, start driving and not stop til it's light. You and me, we'll clean this place out."

We of course tried to argue, but Deans mind was set. Sam and I hadn't a choice but to rush out to the impala and leave the area.

After an hour or so of driving and me being completely silent, Sam glanced at me and let out a sigh.

"Wanna talk about it, kiddo?"

I glanced at him, my brows furrowed and an annoyed scowl on my lips. "About what?"

"Why you're so ticked off."

"Who said I'm ticked off?"

He chuckled. "It's pretty obvious. You look too much like Dean when you're pissed. It's easy to spot."

"Yeah, well. In case you haven't noticed, also like Dean, I don't like having chick flick moments and talking about my feelings."

"Hey, I'm not saying to spill your guts, we cry and then hug and everything is perfect again- But, something's botherin you, and if I can help I wanna try."

I shifted in my seat, returning my attention to the dark scenery whizzing past.

"Ok, fine. I just don't know what to think right now. I'm trying to sort shit out."

"What kind of shit?" When I didn't answer, he reached over and nudged me with the back of his hand. "About Cas' little business arrangement?"

Grumbling, I crossed my arms. "Am I really so readable?"

"Told ya-" He smirked. "You and Dean have the same facial expressions."

"Yeah, well. I guess that's it. I didn't tell you this but the night we met with Eve, after you and Dean had gone to sleep, Cas shared something with me. He shared some of his memories of what Raphael had done, or was going to do- And apparently the a-hole wants to spring Lucifer and Michael from his cage and kick start the apocalypse again."

His head snapped towards me. "What?"

"Yeah- Anyways, after Cas showed me that- He was hoping that I would at least be on his side with this whole Purgatory crap. And, maybe for a little while I actually was at least in the sense that I didn't want to fight with him over it anymore. But, after tonight..."

"And seeing just exactly what sort of crap he's dishing out, you've changed your mind." He finished for me.

"Yeah-" I sighed deeply, feeling my stomach nervous and twisting. "What am I supposed to do, Sammy? I mean, besides you, Dean and Bobby- He's the only family I have. He's my friend, and he expects for me to have his back, and I clearly can't do that anymore. But I also don't wanna just completely abandon him."

He went silent for a moment, as the rumble of the impalas engine was all that could be heard.

"Look-" He shook his head. "I know this isn't gonna be easy to hear... I know you care about him, he's your friend- But, if he's really gonna do this..." He shrugged, trying to play it off. "Then there really is no stopping him."

"But I _want _to stop him. I don't want him to do this. I don't want him going dark-side and turning into something that could very well be the next thing we'd start hunting."

Sam could sense my uneasiness, so he reached over and pulled me into a half hug as he drove.

"Then you're just gonna have to talk to him again. Try to find a way to stop him."

"And if I can't? What then?"

"Then... We'll cross that bridge when we get to it."

I rolled my eyes at that response. It was the easiest thing to spout when you didn't have a real answer to give, or wanted to avoid what you were really thinking. And I knew that Sam was thinking if Cas actually got those souls, he became this powerful _thing _that was dangerous- Then the time might come where we would actually have to try and forcefully stop him. And it killed me to even remotely consider that.


	42. Chapter 42

We finally stopped after pulling into a small town in Idaho that had a motel. I didn't bother to remember the name of the town, the motel, or anything else. My mind was trapped in a spinning fog that just wouldn't evaporate and leave me be. It had been hours since we'd heard from Dean or Cas- And Sam was just as anxious as I was and continued to pace back and forth in front of the two queen sized beds- Just staring at the phone in his hand willing it to ring.

He tried calling them of course, but there was no answer. He tried praying to Cas, still no answer. We both were fearing the worst when finally Sams cell began to jingle and he nearly dropped it to the floor after frantically hitting accept.

"Yeah, Dean?" I noticed he let out a relieved sigh. "Yeah, Victor Idaho, Westside motel, room 4b."

He hanged up and a few seconds passed before Cas and Dean poofed into our motel room. I jumped up from where I sat and rushed to Dean, examining him from head to toe. Of course if he had been injured then Cas would have healed it a long time ago, but still.

"Are you guys ok?" I asked.

Dean nodded. "Yeah, just peachy." He moved to the bed and sat on the end. "Eves little monsters were just precious sweethearts."

"What happened?" Sam asked.

"Oh, ya know-" He shrugged. "Opened the door, told them we're there to rescue them- They snap and try to bite us. Fun fun fun."

"But did they get out? Or did you have to end up killing some of them?"

"One or two lost their heads-" He pursed his lips, glaring at Cas. "The rest got out."

Sam and I watched the heated stares exchanged between both men, wondering what else exactly happened while we were waiting for them. The tension only eased slightly when Dean tore his eyes away and started pulling his shoes off.

"I have to return to heaven." Cas announced. "I'll return when I can to assist with the remaining locations."

He fluttered away before we could say anything and after thirty awkward silent seconds, Dean nodded and stood.

"Ok, we gotta do somethin about this, guys-" He said. "We gotta find a way to take Eve out before the end of this. We can't let Cas get the entrance to Purgatory."

Sam and I were both thinking the same thing, I know it- We were wondering what the hell happened between Cas and Dean while we were gone. Whatever it was had Dean steaming more than usual.

"We've been looking, Dean-" Sam replied. "And, there's nothing on Eve, no info anywhere."

"There's gotta be something!" He clenched his fists at his sides. "You don't get it- We have to kill her and stop this." Now he looked at me. "And for the record, from this point on, you're not goin off alone with Cas anywhere. Got it?"

"Uhh-" I fumbled. "Why?"

"Because I said so. He ain't thinkin straight, obviously. We can't trust him anymore. He's dead set on getting those souls and he doesn't care what happens. So, here's what we're gonna do. We'll work with him when he's actually here, we'll go to all of Crowleys torture dungeons and break out Eves brats, but- We're also gonna find a way to gank that bitch, because if Cas goes through with this, and he _will_- We won't be able to stop him. And I'll be damned if I have to be forced to kill him. We're gonna try to find a way to save him."

"That still doesn't tell me why I can't be alone with him. Don't you think that if we suddenly start treating him like a leper then he's gonna get suspicious?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Dude's got a soft spot for ya, kid- Which means, if you..."

"Ignore him he'll come to his senses?" I interrupted, and he nodded. "_Or_, he'll become even more resentful and still go through with this."

But, something did need to be done, and fast- I was happy at least Dean wasn't just going to go all slashy slashy and take him out, instead he actually wanted to try to save him. I just hoped we could actually find a way to do just that.

* * *

He watched them silently from the corner of Bobbys kitchen. Of course they had no idea that he was even there. It had been happening since the moment Castiel realized Lara had been brought back- During the moments he was supposed to be away, he secretly remained behind while silently, and invisibly observing. He tried to tell himself it was for just reasons- He needed to be certain that his friends were remaining just that... His friends. And for weeks they had been, until now.

Now they were plotting against him, going behind his back to try and find a way of destroying Eve and any chance he would have to getting into Purgatory. Angry wouldn't be the word he would describe how he was feeling, instead it was more along the lines of betrayed. That and desperate to find a way of somehow convincing them that he wasn't this maniacal monster they figured him to be- That he was only doing this to save all of them and extract the perfect amount of revenge for the things Raphael had done. But, for reasons he couldn't understand, they didn't see it that way.

Dean and Sam were reading through old books, ones that they had discovered in a deceased Hunters basement. Lara was sitting at the kitchen table, her mind drifting elsewhere as she gazed out the window. In front of her sat an open book, which had been on the same page for the last twenty minutes.

"Keep readin, cupcake-" Dean said. "We're not gonna get anywhere if you keep day dreaming."

She forcefully dragged her eyes from the window and back to the book, not looking at all happy.

"It's not like we're getting anywhere anyways-" She muttered. "This is a complete waste of time."

"No it's not-" Dean walked from the den and into the kitchen. "There's gotta be something written somewhere. It's just gonna take a while of digging to find it."

"And, what if we don't find it until after all of this is over with, huh?" She shrugged. "Then what? We're screwed, Cas is screwed, and we won't be able to help him."

Castiel furrowed his brows. They believed this to be helping? If anything it was causing him inconvenience because while he was taking time out of his arrangement with Crowley to keep an eye on them, Raphael was getting closer and closer to his goal.

Dean sighed, not disagreeing. "Well, anyways-" He walked over to the fridge and grabbed two beers, lying one down in front of her. "Drink a beer, read the book, and try not to go all Debby Downer on us, ok?"

She mimicked his face sarcastically, watching as he started back for the den, then reached for the beer. With a crunch the bottle suddenly shattered in her hand and she jumped up quickly.

"Fuck! Dammit!" She screamed.

Dean and Sam both rushed towards her and instinctively Cas stepped forward as well, suddenly realizing that he wasn't even supposed to be there. He had no choice but to awkwardly fidget and slink back to his corner and watch from the sidelines.

"Jeez, kid-" Dean said, wrapping her hand with a towel. "You crushed that damned bottle like a he-man."

"Shut up-" She replied, cringing from the blood dripping off the cuts. "It obviously had a crack in it."

No, it didn't. While Cas hadn't taken the time to thoroughly examine the beer bottle, he knew that it was solid and intact. Which meant that she somehow had the strength to crush it with one hand, and not intentionally.

"I'll get the med-kit." Sam exclaimed and rushed from the room.

She flopped back in her chair and Sam came back with the med-kit, which Dean flipped open. He pulled out a pair of long tweezers and removed the towel.

"You got quite a bit of glass stuck in there." He stated. "Gonna be fun yankin them out."

"Awesome-" She rolled her eyes and kept her attention on anything but the blood. "Just don't fuck around."

He washed her palm off with some antiseptic and started with the long and tedious task of picking out the shards of glass. While he did that, Sam picked up what was left of the beer bottle and tossed it in the garbage.

"You completely crushed that thing-" Sam stated. "Most of the pieces are ground into dust. How the hell did that happen?"

"I don't know! It must have been damaged or something, jeez. It's not like I did it on purpose!"

"Yeah-" Dean shook his head. "You've been doin a lot of things _not _on purpose lately you freak."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Obviously by her tone she hadn't taken that as a sarcastic jab like he intended.

"What, you want me to list it off? Ok, you died, came back, then vanished from your bed and woke up on a roof top- Got so sick that you went into a friggin coma, then woke up eight hours later perfectly healthy, and now this? You crush a beer bottle with your left hand, which is your weakest since you're a righty." He pointed to the glass dust on the table. "You obliterated that mother."

"So what," Sam sat at the table as well. "You think there really is somethin up with her?"

"You don't?" Dean paused with the tweezers in hand.

"Love how you guys talk about me like I'm not even here. It's so much fun. Don't you know that if you wanna talk shit about someone you do it behind their backs?" She scowled.

"We aren't talkin shit about you-" Dean pulled a particularly long sliver of glass from her palm with a yank. "We're just sayin, Eve had to have done something. Which is even more of a reason to kill her."

"How could she have done something to me, guys? She didn't even touch me- And you all were in the same room with us so why aren't you having the same shit happen?"

Castiel let his eyes flick from person to person, as both brothers had no answer to that question. He knew that Eve hadn't of corrupted her somehow, or possibly turned her, he would have been able to sense that- But still, there clearly was something happening and he had no idea what it might have been. Her soul was still visible, which meant she was still human- And other than that there was no other explanation- Unless it was something caused from her resurrection. Perhaps Lee had done something incorrectly? Or, had done something _intentionally_.

"Alright, so-" Lara changed the subject. "What's our next move?"

"Find the next location I guess." Sam answered. "What other choice do we have?"

"Yeah but, Cas isn't exactly here right now. Which means that we have no demons to interrogate and no way of finding the next monster building." She sat back, cringing as Dean began to stitch up her palm. "Unless you guys wanna go find a demon, we have no choice but to sit here and wait for Cas to come back."

They went silent until Dean snickered. "Remember when we used to just hunt normal monsters and drive around the country?"

"Nope-" Sam rolled his eyes. "Things have changed too much."

"And, with me- I came into the picture after Lucifer was out of his cage, so... I can't exactly reminisce either." Lara replied.

Dean grumbled quietly. "You two suck."

Sam and Lara exchanged smirks, and Dean finally finished bandaging up her hand.

"So, guess we're gonna have to hunt down our own demon." Sam leaned forward with his elbows on the table. "And... Since it's gonna have to be one that works for Crowley. It's not gonna be easy."

"When are things _ever _easy?" Dean scowled.

"Touché." Lara said. "Ya know. Maybe if we just talked to him again..."

"Can't." Dean interrupted. "Look, I know you wanna trust him Lara- But... You can't. Plain and simple."

Castiel crossed his arms and leaned against the wall, his jaw tightened.

"He's right, Lara-" Sam shook his head. "I know it's not somethin we wanna admit, but we have to. Cas has gone dark-side. He's not our Cas anymore. He's Crowleys bitch."

Castiel didn't want to hear anymore, he knew that if he did he very well might lose his temper.

* * *

It had been a week since we had raided Crowleys first building- And Sam and Dean had been hunting down demon after demon trying to find one that had any info on where the other locations were. We were slowly building up a stack of dead empty meat suits, because after hours and hours of their "interrogating" no one was willing to divulge any information. So, it was the same thing all over again. Another demon, one possessing an eighteen year old girl, was tied in Bobbys basement being doused in holy water and grilled to the point of madness by my brothers and Bobby. Me? Just as the previous instances I avoided the interrogating and instead lingered around outside.

It was hot as hell outside, summer was beating down on me with a vengeance, and it didn't help that I refused to step back in the house until the demon was either dead or exorcised. It was disheartening knowing that so many people possessed were dying because of this. Either they had been dead long before we got hold of them- Or they were pretty much dead once the demon was gone. Out of every single demon we dragged back to this place, only one man had survived but was now currently on life support at Sioux Falls Hospital.

All of this... All of this _crap _just to get a location to a building that Cas probably would have been able to discover in two seconds. Still though, Sam and Dean refused to call him, they thought it was just too risky.

After the sun had burnt me to a crisp I finally decided to seek sanctuary under the shade of the awning on Bobbys garage. I sipped at a beer, cringing slightly at my bandaged hand that was still causing me discomfort. Yeah, a frickin beer bottle literally busted in my hand, for no reason at all. I know that I hadn't squeezed it that hard, and I refused to believe or accept what Sam and Dean were thinking. Eve didn't do anything to me, she couldn't have infected me or turned me, it was something else that couldn't be explained. Some other freak occurrence.

When I heard a flutter of wings beside me, first thoughts were to run and tell Sam and Dean. But, I couldn't- Because the second Cas came into view the only thing I could think of was how badly I wanted to convince him to stop this nonsense.

"Hello, Lara." He said, his hands in his coat pockets.

"Hey-" I glanced around, wondering when my brothers would notice he was here. "What's up?"

He looked past me, as the strong breeze rippled through his hair.

"I had a moment to return and see how things were going-" He answered. "And to also help find the next location."

"Oh, well- Sam and Dean's got a demon in the basement right now. Trying to interrogate her- I don't think it's going so well though."

"They've been interrogating demons without me?" Why did it sound as though he tried a little too hard to sound surprised at that?

"They're impatient... What can I say?" I shrugged.

"How's your hand?" He asked now. "Did Dean manage to remove all of the glass?"

"Yeah, I think so- But it hurts like a mother fuc..." My words trailed off. "Wait a second. How did you know about that?" When he went stiff it was as though everything came crashing down all around me. "Wait... Wait... You've been spying on us- Haven't you?" I leapt from the table I sat on. "You've been spying?! Really, Cas? Are you serious?"

He was stunned into silence for a good thirty seconds. "I can explain."

"Explain what? That you've been, what, going invisible and watching us? Why would you do that?"

"It isn't what you think." He refused to look me in the eye.

"Not what I think, huh? Yeah you couldn't possibly know what I'm thinking right now, unless, of course- You've been reading our thoughts without telling us either!"

He sighed and looked away. "I haven't been doing that. I give my word."

I started pacing, rubbing my head with my good hand. "Your word... How can you expect me to believe that when you've been hiding in the shadows spying on us? I thought we were your friends?"

"You are. That's precisely why I've been watching. I wanted to-" He quickly stopped.

"Wanted to what?" I shrugged. "To make sure we weren't trying to find a way of stopping you from making the biggest mistake of your life?" He said nothing to that. "You do realize, Cas- That the only reason why we're so adamant about you not doing this is because we care about what happens to you, right?"

He looked about ready to crack, which meant that I needed to go to the next level. If I could just get through to him, to talk him down from this suicide run...

I moved to stand in front of him and took a chance by cupping my hand on his cheek.

"Think about it, Cas." I said, and he closed his eyes. "If you do this, they won't give up. They'll try to find a way to stop you. If we mean _anything _to you at all, please don't do this. It's not right, and you know it. You know how I am, I don't ask for much and I have no expectations- But I'm begging you right now, please- _Don't do it_. Please, don't make me watch you die."

His eyes shot open again and he nodded. "What am I supposed to do?"

I shrugged, moving my hand down to his. "We'll figure something out. And, if worse comes to worse- We'll go down together... All of us."

He couldn't seem to meet my eyes, instead kept his attention fixed on the house.

"I need to speak with Dean-" He said. "I don't think it will be easy to convince him that I've changed my mind-" Finally he looked at me. "Or any of you I imagine."

Holy crap... Did it really work? Did I really somehow talk him out of this?

"He's inside. And you're right. He might not believe you at first, but- Just give him time." I said.

I led the way back to inside the house, and Cas and I waited for the boys to emerge from the basement.


	43. Chapter 43

To say that Dean was skeptical would be an understatement. After Cas told him that he had a change of heart and he realized what he was going to do wouldn't be worth it, Dean merely stood there with his arms crossed, and a scowl. Sam, however, obviously was happy at the turn of events, and myself, well... I would like to say that I believed Cas had really changed his mind, but- I guess I was too damned much like Dean. He was gonna have to prove it, somehow- And I wasn't sure how he would accomplish that.

"So, you just changed your mind?" Dean asked, his arms still crossed. "Just like that?"

"No-" Cas shook his head. "Believe it or not, Dean- But I've had doubts the entire time I was working with Crowley."

"Uh, Not to sound all bitchy-" Sam shrugged. "But what made you finally decide to call this off?"

"I suppose I finally realized that protecting you clouded my judgement- And the thought of thinking of anything else that could work against Raphael would require too much time. I wanted this war over _now_, no matter what the consequences. But, Lara was right. I should have come to you first for help."

"If you really mean this-" Dean stepped forward. "Then how're you gonna prove it, huh? I don't wanna pick a fight here, but I'm serious- You gotta look at it from my point of view, man. I need something other than your say so on this."

Cas nodded, sitting awkwardly at the kitchen table. "I realize that. And, the only way I can think of is to tell Crowley that the deal is off. I'll no longer help him."

"Yet again, that's just gonna leave us to go on your say so."

"I'll take you with me." Cas stood. "If you want definite proof, then I'll take you with me to meet Crowley."

Dean certainly wasn't expecting him to say that- His arms finally uncrossed and the scowl vanished.

"Ok then. Let's go." He grabbed the magic knife and his gun, which he stuffed in the back of his belt. Cas then approached, lied his had on his shoulder and they poofed away.

"That was unexpected." Bobby said. "What you two think of that?"

"I wanna believe him." Sam answered. "I think that... Well I think he might be telling the truth."

Bobby looked to me now.

"I wanna believe him too, obviously- But I've learned by now to not get my hopes up with things." I replied.

Plus I hadn't yet told them that Cas had previously been spying on us, which didn't exactly jump up his credibility points.

Overall, they weren't gone for more than twenty minutes when they suddenly poofed back to Bobbys, and once there Dean let out a grunt and limped his way to the sofa.

"That went... Well-" He said sarcastically.

Cas immediately healed him of whatever was wrong, but it didn't keep Dean from cradling his left ankle.

"What happened?" I asked, jumping up from my chair.

"Uh- Well-" Dean rolled his eyes. "Cas told him that the deal was off, that he wasn't gonna help him any longer- Crowley got pissed and sent four of his henchmen after us. I got knocked across the room and smashed into the wall, Cas smote them- Then we zapped back here."

"That's it?" Sam let out a nervous chuckle.

"No-" Cas scowled. "Crowley has of course made threats on all of you as repayment for me changing my mind."

"Well, that's to be expected. He's a whiny little bitch when he doesn't get his way." I said. "So, is this really it, Cas? You meant what you said?"

He nodded, and of course he didn't look very pleased with the situation. "I meant what I said. And I can only hope that now all of you will believe me."

Dean grumbled and sat back against the cushions. "Well, getting tossed into the wall kinda helped solidify that, dude. 'Course, for all I know that coulda been the both of you playin charades."

"Dean-" I rubbed my head. "Jeez, really. You're more untrusting than I am, what the hell?"

"I'm just being realistic-" He threw his arms up. "Cause what I wanna know, is if you're so dead set on ganking Raphael, Cas- Then how do you expect to do it now?"

We waited for him to answer that, because it was the million dollar question. Of course he wouldn't just abandon his quest of taking down that asshole- Which is what made him suddenly changing his mind about Purgatory all the more fishy.

"There might be a way, but- It will be much more difficult." He answered. "I would need all of Heavens weapons. And, unfortunately, they've been stolen."

"Heavens weapons?" Sam asked. "And those are, what?"

"Many different items used in Biblical times. The staff of Moses for instance is one of them."

Sam, Dean and I exchanged looks.

"So if you have all of these weapons, you would be able to fight against Raphael?" I asked.

"I believe so, yes."

"Awesome-" Dean kicked back and shielded his eyes with his arm. "Not like we don't have enough to do already, what with Eve and all. Now we gotta search for Heavens stolen weapons?"

"I could always search for them myself, Dean." Cas offered, which Dean quickly denied.

"No- We stick together from here on out, none of us fly solo. You want us to trust you again? Then this is how."

Cas didn't seem to mind that much- Who knows, maybe he was hoping we would welcome him back with open arms. And even though Dean was gruff about it, as he usually was in situations like these, I could tell that he wanted his best bud back fighting with us.

* * *

All I remembered was that I had went to sleep that night in a decent mood. Having Cas back, and knowing that he was giving up on Purgatory had seemed to put all of us in a good humor. But, I remembered going to bed a little after 2 a.m falling asleep almost instantly and being stuck in the middle of another horrific nightmare.

Everything around me was on fire, I was trapped in the middle of a forest that was completely engulfed in flames. It was slowly eating its way towards me, the small clearing I was stuck in was being singed black as the fire grew nearer.

I was panicking, shaking, the heat was so extreme that it felt like my skin was melting- I tried to scream but nothing would come out but smoke filled wheezes. By the time I was lucky enough to wake from this awful nightmare the pain had become so unbearable that I couldn't move.

Naturally, just as the last time this happened, my eyes stared not up at the ceiling of Bobbys spare bedroom- But the blacked out remnants of what used to be trees. I sat up quickly, my breath catching in my throat. Just as when I awoke on the roof I dreamt of, I was lying in the center of a charred and smoking forest clearing. The entire area around me looked to have been burnt beyond all recognition. There were still a few branches and bushes that were slightly on fire.

I examined myself from head to toe, noticing that my clothes were full of burnt holes to the point they were completely destroyed. My pants were barely anything left but enough material to halfway cover my backside and never mind the front. Thank god I was wearing underwear. Not that my shirt was much better, yet again, I was thankful to be wearing my underwear. Yeah, I was disturbed beyond belief, but I was just happy my skin wasn't baked and I still had my hair and eyebrows, but I _was_ covered in black soot from head to toe. I looked as though I had just gone head to head with a friggin fire breathing dragon.

Luckily I had my cell phone in my pocket- Since my first Houdini act Dean had insisted that I sleep with my phone at all times just in case it happened again. Unfortunately though, once pulling it from what was left of my pocket I noticed the screen was completely melted.

"Dammit."

Ok, now it was time to panic. I had no idea where I was, so I started running and didn't stop for a good twenty minutes. It was never ending burnt forest, with no sign what so ever of an exit, a street or a friggin house! Wherever I was, I was miles and miles inward and had no idea which way to go to get out.

When I finally stopped my feet felt raw from running on the hot ground. I tried to find the first area that hadn't been charred beyond belief and it just so happened to be a large boulder. I checked it first, making sure it was cool, and thankfully it was before I crawled on top and sat down.

Ok, I was beyond screwed this time- At least with the first time of this crap happening I was in a city and could use a frickin payphone. This time, I was stranded out in the middle of a god damned forsaken no where! Not only that, but my feet were blistered and completely fucked up, so I couldn't even think to run anymore.

Alright. I was going against what Lee told me now, I didn't have a choice- And yeah even though Lee had done me a solid and sent me back, I wasn't exactly wanting to talk to him right now and have to listen to his belly aching. He would somehow find a way to blame these mysterious incidents on my brothers or Cas, and they clearly weren't responsible. So, even if this came to bite me back in the ass later- I would have to deal with it.

"Cas-" I said. "Hope you can hear me. I have no frickin idea where I am. All I know is that I'm in a forest that's been on fire. It's completely black and smoldering. I was running for twenty minutes until I kinda hurt myself and yeah I'm stuck. I have no idea if you can even find me or not, but I didn't know what else to do."

I let out a sigh and let my eyes dart around the charcoal forest around me. I didn't expect for Cas to be able to find me, because of the damned sigils on my ribcage. So, of course I was surprised when I heard a flutter of wings and Cas was suddenly standing in front of me.

"Dude-" I said, momentarily forgetting about my feet and jumping up. "How... How did you find me?"

He looked just as confused as I felt, with his scrunched brows and baby faced expression.

"I..." He stopped, taking a look around what was left of the forest. "I don't know."

"You don't know?" I cringed and sat back on the boulder. "What do you mean you don't know?"

"I heard your prayer and somehow instantly knew your location-" He tore his eyes away from the scenery and only then noticed how burnt and messed up I was. "Are you hurt?"

"Just the bottom of my feet from running on the flaming grass." I answered.

He immediately pulled off his trench-coat and wrapped it around me, and I was instantly relieved at not having so much open skin showing. Afterwards, I looked up at him and was taken aback.

"Ha... I've never seen you without your coat before-" I snickered. "It's weird."

He wasn't nearly as amused with the situation as I was. "Dean and Sam have been frantic since you disappeared. We should head back."

"Wait-" I held up my hand halting him. "How long have I been gone?"

"Three days."

Uh... Wait a second, did he just say...

"Three days?! What the hell?!"

"I don't know-" He looked ready to tare his hair out. "I have no explanation for what happened."

He scooped me up now and zapped us back to Bobbys. Just as the last time Sam and Dean swarmed me. Dean yanked me from Cas' arms and carried me over to the sofa like I was dying.

"What happened?" He asked.

"Don't ask." I replied. "Just as last time, I have no idea."

"Med-kit." Dean commanded and Sam rushed from the room. "Where was she this time?"

"Tongass National forest in Alaska." Cas answered.

I froze on the couch, my eyes were wide and mouth agape. Alaska? How the hell did I end up in friggin Alaska?

"Well what the hell happened to her? She looks like she walked straight through a wall of fire."

"I don't know. The entire forest surrounding her was destroyed as well. It was still smoldering when I found her."

Sam returned with the med-kit and yet again I was forced to sit through my wounds being tended to by Dean.

"You were gone for three damn days." Dean bellowed. "What do you remember?"

I tried to swallow the lump in my throat, not wanting them to see that I was as freaked out as I was.

"Nothing... I remember going to sleep, and having another nightmare. It felt like it lasted a few minutes and then I woke up in that forest."

"You've got to be starving." Bobby said. "I'll heat ya up somethin."

"Thanks." I muttered.

"What was the nightmare this time?" Sam asked.

"I was surrounded by fire, go figure, in the forest. I couldn't get out."

Dean slightly pushed aside Cas' trench-coat and noticed the state of my clothes.

"Damn. Ok, someone explain this to me- How the hell could she be in the middle of a forest fire, her clothes get eaten up, but there ain't a mark on her but for the bottom of her feet?"

"Actually-" I interrupted. "Those burns weren't there until I started running." Everyone gawked at me, which instantly made me uncomfortable. "Just... To clarify, ya know."

"Well that doesn't make it any less weird." Sam said, then sighed. "Ok, so. The last time this happened, not long after Lara got sick. Are we to assume it's gonna happen again this time too?"

Dean seemed to have forgotten about that, then shook his head. "What the hell is goin on here, guys? It's like she's friggin cursed or something."

"No hex bags." I said with a sneer, and immediately received a scowl from everyone around me. "Jeez, sorry. Just trying to lighten the mood."

"Well stop it!" Dean barked. "Stop tryin to play this off as if it's nothing."

"I'm not. Believe me, I'm just as freaked as you guys, but since there's no way of knowing what the hell is happening..."

"What about Lee?" Sam asked, which in turn caused Cas to glare at him.

"What about him?" I asked.

"Wouldn't he have a way to help?"

"Fuck that shit-" Dean said. "Yeah, gotta give the dude props for bringing Lara back, but doesn't mean I trust him."

"I agree with Dean." Cas replied.

"Of course you do-" Sam rolled his eyes. "Because you hate the guy."

"Either way," I broke through the argument. "I'm not calling him. Not that I _hate _him perse, but I don't exactly want to be responsible for getting his ass killed and wiping out what's left of my so called _race_."

Dean finished wrapping my feet with gauze to the point I could barely walk- Not that I could very well anyhow, since they hurt like hell. After eating a piece of pizza Bobby heated up for me and chugging down an entire liter of water, I excused myself back upstairs to change into something that wasn't charred to smithereens. Since I couldn't really take a shower with my stupid feet, I washed up in the sink- Practically shrieking at my reflection and how soot stained my skin happened to be. Seriously, how the hell did I not get burnt up?

Washing my hair in the sink was annoying, but once I was finished I threw on some clean clothes and returned down stairs with Cas' coat in hand. He was standing in his usual spot so I nudged him and handed him his coat, which he quickly threw back on. I don't think he knew how to function without it.

After flopping back on the couch and propping my feet up, I nodded.

"K, so what now?"

"Now nothing-" Dean answered. "We don't have the next location, we don't know where Heavens missing nukes are at- So, nothin."

"_So_, I guess during the three days I was gone you _didn't _interrogate anymore demons?" I arched a brow.

"Uh... No, kiddo." Sam snickered. "We were kinda trying to figure out what the hell happened to you."

Oh sure like that's an excuse to skimp out on the research. Didn't these dip-shits remember we had a so called dead line here before Eve would start slaughtering? Apparently not.


	44. Chapter 44

_**Holy crap I've hit 100 reviews. Just wanna say thanks for that, it's the most reviews I've ever gotten on anything I've written.**_

* * *

"Hit me." Cas said, staring down at his cards.

"Dude, you have eighteen." I said.

"Hit me." He repeated.

I rolled my eyes and gave him another card, showing now he had twenty. Yeah, we were playing black jack.

"Hit me." He said yet again.

"Dude. I don't think you understand the concept of this game-" Dean said. "You don't hit on a friggin twenty, you stay."

"I understand." He looked up, and smirked slightly. "Hit me."

Dean and I both rolled our eyes and I drew another card, lying it down. It was a King.

"Too bad, so sad." I said, pulling back his cards. "Maybe you'll learn next time, huh?"

"I don't understand. I had the deck memorized almost exactly. It should have been an Ace lied down." His mouth curved downwards into an obvious frown.

"Hey, you're not supposed to count the cards, Cas- That's cheating." I said.

"How is that cheating? I simply deduced the outcome by..."

"Never mind." I sighed.

"Lara, shut up." Dean talked out of the corner of his mouth as if it was inconspicuous. "He's losing, we're winning. Don't jinx it."

After lying the cards down I sat back. "It's no fun if we're guaranteed to win every hand, Dean. Besides, Cas obviously doesn't get it so it's not really fair."

"I understand the game, but now I believe that you've stacked the cards." Cas replied.

I arched a brow at him, crossing my arms over my chest. "Uh, what?"

Dean instantly started snickering. "You're in trouble now, man."

"Why?" Cas' eyes got shifty again. "I was only making a valid observation?"

"I'm not playing with you douchers anymore-" I said, pushing away from the table. "I'm hungry."

"Chick takes her card games seriously, dude. You don't accuse the woman of cheating." Dean couldn't stop snickering.

After rummaging through the fridge and finding nothing edible, I settled for a beer and joined Sam in the den. We were just biding our time until nightfall, since earlier that day after Cas returned with what seemed like the millionth demon, we finally got the second location to one of Crowleys torture dungeons. Apparently even though Cas told him the deal was off and he wouldn't help him anymore, he was still going through with the whole Purgatory crap. Which meant we needed to now, in turn, stop _Crowley_.

It had been a few days since my second disappearing act, and so far there wasn't any sign of me getting sick again. Not that everyone didn't watch me every second of the day. It's as though they were simply waiting for me to fall on the ground in another traumatizing coma. Which, wasn't happening. I hadn't had anymore headaches, no fevers, no puking my guts up. I was fine, despite the blisters on the bottom of my feet. Yeah there was still the unanswered questions as to why this was happening to me in the first place, but after Sams researching practically twenty four hours a day, he couldn't find anything. Neither could Dean, and Cas had no explanation. Basically I was a walking mystery.

First guesses was maybe some pissed off angel somewhere was trying to eff with my head. Said angel being Gabriel- Since this seemed right up his alley. He was known for doing crazy and cruel pranks on people all for the sake of his own entertainment. After all, he had stuck Sam and Dean in Groundhog day and Sam was forced to relive Deans death hundreds of times. It wouldn't be too far fetched to say that maybe he found it hilarious to zap me to unknown locations and try to set me on fire. Frickin asshole.

But, if it was Gabriel, we had no way of knowing. Since Lucifer was put back in his cage he had completely disappeared- And even though Cas had tried to summon him, he refused to answer the call. So, we were back to square one and back to guessing. Which, of course, wasn't working out in our favor.

But as long as I wasn't dying, I wasn't disappearing everyday and getting stuck in more forest fires, then I wasn't going to let it concern me. I know, I know- Stupid of me, but what can I say? There were other issues at hand that needed to be dealt with. First of course being Eve, and then somehow stopping Crowley from breaking into Purgatory.

Sam noticed my strange expression as he peered at me from over his laptop.

"What's with that face?" He asked.

"I was just sitting here thinking how crazy and effed up our lives are."

He rose both brows. "_Uhuh_. Yeah, well whatever makes ya happy."

I snickered. "No, seriously. Have you ever just sat back and thought about it? Like, oh yeah. I've died and come back to life, so has Dean, so has my sister- So has everyone around me. Nah, it's cool cause we hunt _monsters_, and the Devil, and dick-hole angels. Meanwhile the King of Hell wants to filet us alive, and Eve wants to eat our faces."

He blinked a few times over. "Yeah ok. I see your point."

"And, no- It's not like we can have friends, at least normal friends, because if we even remotely told them what it was we do for a living, we'd be stuffed in the nuthouse, or thrown in jail."

He closed his laptop and gawked at me. "You feelin ok?"

"Stop asking me that. I'm fine. I'm not sick, I'm friggin fantastic!"

Dean and Cas entered the room.

"Uh, Lara. You pissed or something?" Dean asked.

I froze, unsure of where that outburst came from. For a moment I tried to shake those thoughts away, but couldn't, so I put my head in my hands when suddenly something exploded beside Sam. I looked up just in time to see him duck to avoid the lamp beside him shattering into a million tiny jagged pieces.

"What the..." Dean moved closer, then glared at me. "What did you do?"

"Nothing?" I shrugged. "I didn't do anything."

"You friggin exploded that lamp!" He shouted.

"Yeah, Dean- I blew up the lamp, it couldn't have been a short circuit or something logical." I looked to Sam. "You ok?"

"Yeah, fine-" Sam stood and gave me the same hard glare as Dean was. "Lara something's up with you. You're freakin us out."

Cas moved closer and grabbed me by the chin, pulling my face up until my eyes met his.

"Her pupils are dilated." He stated. "Lara, have you been taking any hallucinogenic drugs such as LSD?"

"Please tell me you're joking." I replied bitterly.

"Ok, that's it. I can't take this anymore-" Dean stomped towards me and dragged me down the stairs and to Bobbys panic room. "Until we figure out what the hell is going on with you, you're gonna stay down here where we know you're safe."

He shoved me through the door.

"Dean, don't be an ass. You can't keep me locked in here. You need backup tonight."

"Oh, no- You're not goin any place that requires you holding a weapon, sister. You're going bat shit crazy, you're exploding lamps and crushing beer bottles with your bare hand. You're staying here." Cas and Sam had followed us down and Dean pointed his finger in Cas' face. "And I swear to god if you fall for her crap and let her outa there I'm gonna kick your ass."

Cas said nothing and before long the thick iron door was slammed in my face.

* * *

"This has gotta be Gabriels work-" Dead said with a shake of his head. "It's got his stink all over it."

Sam brushed his hair from his face with an apparent sigh. "Yeah, well. He's not answering us. And, even if it was him, why? Why her? Why now?"

"That's what I'm trying to understand." Cas said. "If Gabriel is responsible for the strange occurrences with Lara, I have no logical explanation."

"So you really think it could be him?" Sam went on.

"It's very plausible."

"I guess he got bored with screwin with our heads and now's decided to start in with our sister?" Dean punched at Bobbys desktop. "Is it more entertaining for him, or what?"

"What you fail to understand, Dean-" Cas replied. "Is that Gabriel didn't do those things to you just for sheer entertainment alone. Granted, it wasn't the best way to approach the situations but he was trying to teach you a lesson. First, by forcing Sam to relive your death over and over- That was his way of trying to tell him that he couldn't save you from the pit. Second, when he placed you in television shows, he was trying to get you accept your roles of being vessels."

Sam rose both brows. "Huh, so you think he's trying to get Lara to learn some kind of lesson too? What exactly would it be though?"

"That I can't answer. Because I fail to understand how moving her to different areas and setting her inside a burning forest could qualify as a proper example."

Dean pushed away from the desk. "Ok, well. Should we try to call the dick again? Or just sit back and do nothin while Lara is tortured?"

"I'll attempt to summon him again." Cas sighed. "But I don't think it'll do much good."

"She's been down there a few hours," Sam said, standing. "I'm gonna go check on her. It's a little too quiet down there."

He left the den and descended the stairs to the panic room, and pulled the little window open, peaking inside.

Lara was lying on the cot, perfectly still, seeming to be napping.

"Hey, kiddo-" He called out. "You doin ok in there? You need anything?"

No response.

"Lara?" He practically smashed his face against the window. "Hey, you hear me?"

Still nothing.

"Crap, guys get down here!" He shouted, then pulled the door open and rushed inside.

When he approached the cot he immediately shook her by the shoulders. She was completely still, her eyes wouldn't open.

"Lara?" He tapped her on the cheek. "Wake up, wake up dammit!"

Dean, Cas and Bobby each piled into the room- Dean moved to the other side of the cot and lied his hand on her forehead.

"No fever-" He said, then proceeded to shake her just as Sam had done. "What the hell... Not again. She won't wake up again."

Cas knelt over and forcefully pulled up one of her eyelids. "Her pupils are still dilated."

"Why does this keep happening?" Bobby asked. "If this is Gabriel, can't he give it a rest already?"

"Should we take her back to the hospital?" Sam asked.

"And tell them what? That our sister just went to sleep again and didn't wake up, oh and that yeah she was there not two weeks ago in a coma, then just got up and walked out?" Dean retorted.

"This isn't a medical ailment." Cas said. "There would be nothing they could do."

"So we just let her lie here?" Sam huffed. "What if she gets worse? Or what if she disappears again?"

Dean responded to that by grabbing the leather restraints that Sam was all too familiar with. After all, he had them used on himself when Dean was trying to detox him from the demon blood. He strapped her wrists and ankles to the legs of the cot and then shrugged.

"Let's hope that does the trick."

"If Gabriel is the one moving her, Dean- Then restraints won't stop him." Cas replied.

"Isn't there a spell or something you could cast that would keep her from blipping out?"

He shook his head. "No, because of the one that's already placed on her, it prevents me from giving any form of aid."

"Crap-" Dean sat on the end of the cot. "I forgot about that."

"We should take shifts." Sam said. "We'll each take turns keeping an eye out on her- It's getting late. I'll go first."

"No-" Dean shook his head. "I'll go first, go on up and get some sleep, Sammy."

Sam nodded and stood from the cot, leaving the panic room. Bobby soon followed.

Hours passed as Dean sat in the chair beside her, refusing to take his eyes off her. He was afraid that if he would budge, or even blink she might just disappear. Cas stood off to the side, his arms crossed and equally glaring at her. They hadn't spoken since Sam had went to sleep, and Dean could feel himself about ready to fall over from exhaustion. After nodding off once or twice, he ended up having to stand and try to wake himself up.

"Dean, why don't you go upstairs and get some rest- I can watch over her." Cas offered.

He shook his head. "No. I'm good."

He only stopped pacing when Lara suddenly twitched an arm- He quickly darted to her and lightly shook her by the shoulders.

"Hey, wake up kid-" He said. "Comon, wake up."

But she didn't, instead her body instantly went stiff and then started to shake in an obvious convulsion. Every muscle in her body was clenched as her wrists pulled against the leather restraints.

"Cas, help!" Dean shouted, and Cas darted over as they both tried to hold her down. "Dammit, what the hell is happening?!"

It was unbearable to witness, watching her shake and seize and struggle to breathe. And within a matter of seconds, as both Dean and Cas tried to hold her down and contain her, it finally stopped and her eyes shot open.

Dean let out a relieved sigh as she stared blankly up at the ceiling completely silent and still.

"Lara?" He asked.

She gave no response, instead like a frightening nightmare she suddenly vanished from the cot.


	45. Chapter 45

_Four months later_

* * *

The snow was falling down in gentle large flakes, almost hypnotizing me into a trance as I watched them. Even from inside, I could almost feel the frigid chill.

"Are you going to answer my questions today?" The woman in a white lab coat beside me asked. "Or are you going to ignore me again?"

"What do you want to know?" I finally replied, taring my eyes away from the window.

My room was blank white walls, bare but for a few of the finger paintings I had done in the recreation room a few weeks before hand. My bed was small, plain, and hard as a rock I was certain. The atmosphere in general in this place wasn't that of comfort, but extreme paranoia, anger and angst.

"Do you know where you are?" She asked, holding an open folder in her lap.

"General Hills Psychiatric hospital-" I answered. "Just as always."

"That's right." She scribbled on my personal files inside the folder. "And do you know how long you've been here?"

I shrugged, sitting back and holding my arms around myself. "I think since August?"

"That's right, good. You're getting better at remembering how much time has passed." She leaned forward. "Do you remember how you came to be here?"

Now I shook my head. "No."

"You were found wandering on the side of the interstate in a storm. You weren't wearing any shoes and your clothes were burnt... Remember?" Yet again I shook my head. "A state police man found you and tried to help, you started screaming and hitting him. Remember?"

"No." I blankly replied.

She sighed. "Do you remember my name?"

"No."

"It's Doctor Reynolds. Do you remember your name?"

"No- Why do you keep asking me that every fucking day? I don't remember my name!"

"Ok, calm down. There's no need to lose your cool. Remember I'm just trying to help you."

"Stop patronizing me. You're not trying to help me, you just think I'm nuts."

She shook her head, pulling her thick plastic glasses from the end of her nose.

"You were admitted here four months ago. We're only trying to help you remember what happened to you, dear."

"Whatever-" I stared at my uneaten dinner sitting before me on the table, which was now cold. "What's the point if I can't even remember my own name?"

"That's why you're here." She tried to smile, trying to come off as caring but it didn't reach her eyes which told me instantly it was fake. "You're Jane Doe, don't you want to know what your real name is?"

"Everyone here calls me Lucy, not Jane." Was my response.

"Is that what you want me to call you?"

"It doesn't matter."

She scribbled some more on the papers. "Ok, Lucy- Have you been having anymore, as what you call them, flashes?"

"I have them everyday."

"So you had one today as well?"

I turned in my chair, facing her with a scowl. "If I say everyday, then doesn't that mean yes, I've had one today too?"

She didn't care much for my attitude, and I was positive that the next day I would yet again have a different "Doctor". Since I had been admitted into this hell-hole I had gone through five psychiatrists. No one could tolerate my sarcasm, my mood swings and rude comments.

"What did you see today?" She smiled, instead of lashing out at me. So far at least she had a little more patience.

"Same thing. People. Three men. It's as if I know them but I can't remember their names, or where I've seen them before."

"And do any of these men stand out more than the others?"

"One-" I shuddered at the thought. "The one in the trench-coat."

"And why does he stand out more than the other two?"

"It's not that he _stands out _more exactly. Because the other two, they're just as prominent. I don't know... I can't really explain it."

Doctor Reynolds crossed one leg over the other. "Why don't you try, Lucy. Try to explain it."

I rested my head against my hands. "He's probably in his thirties, has blue eyes..."

"I don't mean what he looks like, Lucy- I mean, what about him stands out?"

"It's just a feeling I get whenever he's in my head. It's calming, peaceful... Like maybe he's a friend."

"Or something more, maybe?"

"I dunno. But the other two men are different. Maybe family members, I'm not sure."

She jotted down a few more words, and I couldn't help but wonder if she was only doing that just for the sake of looking professional.

"I think that will be all for today, Lucy-" She stood. "Why don't you go to the recreation room for some activities."

I watched her leave my room with a frown. It was miserable in this place, and not remembering who you were, with only having flashes of faces was enough to drive you crazy. But what I had never told any of the shrinks here was that along with the flashes was horrific nightmares. Monsters and creatures that were enough to scare the crap out of someone haunted my sleep almost every night. But what was equally disturbing was seeing myself with these monsters, hacking and slashing with heads rolling. Whether or not these dreams were just a twisted section of my psyche or if I actually had killed, I wasn't sure.

After I was certain the Doctor was gone, I rushed to my bed and pulled out a notepad from underneath my mattress. Since I had been stuck here I had been writing down anything and everything that I felt held some sort of significance. The name Dean was written down nearly a hundred times, that name kept flashing through my head at a million miles an hour. A few strange symbols that I couldn't identify as well was another that was doodled on the pages. And last but not least, the word, or name, Winchester. But now I had something else to write down- I had seen it in the last flash of memory, a house surrounded by old broken down vehicles. I sketched it as well as possible, but I wasn't a Picasso or Monet, so it didn't look like much. But I didn't care. Just as long as I had it there in case my mind went to crap again, I would have something to look back on.

The only thing I new for certain was that my name was not Lucy, and the fact that everyone kept calling me that in this nuthouse was pissing me off. But, I said nothing because honestly, I didn't want to be referred to as Jane Doe.

I kept writing down names that might have sounded familiar. The names Ellen, Jo, and Cas kept shooting through my head. But I didn't think those could have been my name. No, but maybe they were acquaintances of mine. For the moment I had no choice but to be called Lucy.

Once I was through reading over my notepad I placed it back under my mattress and shoved on my crazy slippers and left the room. The recreation room was down the hall a ways from my room, and during the walk I glared at everyone that might have passed me.

During the months that I had been here I had built up a certain reputation. The other patients were scared of me, they would literally turn and flee in the opposite direction whenever they saw me coming. A few of the "saner" ones had started a rumor that the reason I was in this place was because I had hacked my parents to death with an axe. Which in turn, resulted in a few assholes nick naming me Lizzie Borden. So, I had two alias' in this joint. Lucy, and Lizzie.

The reasons for that were my own fault I suppose. I was extremely defensive and picked fights easily, had mopped the floor with a few dumb bastards that decided to try something with me. Or, had been picking on a few of the weaker individuals stuck here that couldn't defend themselves. One particular woman was probably around my age, had a horrible case of schizophrenia and would sit in a corner sobbing the majority of the day. A few of the younger guys here had been tormenting the poor girl so badly that she had tried to hang herself with her bed sheet. So, needless to say that the next day, one dude had a broken nose and concussion, and the other two left knew what it felt to have their balls kicked up inside of them.

So, because of that, people knew to stay away from me.

The recreation room was full of tables, an old faded flowered sofa with a tv in front- And a few board games stacked on a shelf in the corner. Usually I would camp in front of the tv if I had nothing else to do, or step out onto the closed in porch where the smokers frequented.

As soon as I stepped inside the room, the place went quiet. A few people jumped up from their table and fled to the other side of the room, others that didn't even knew I existed merely rocked back and forth staring blankly off at nothing.

I headed for my usual seat in front of the tv, which was currently occupied by a middle aged man who chafed me in the wrong way. As soon as he saw my expression he jumped up and gave me my seat, which I quickly took.

"Mornin, Lizzie." Carl said.

Carl was an eighteen year old kid with bipolar disorder, and someone that I didn't hate in this place. He had my back and I had his.

"Hey, Carl. How's it goin?"

"Not good-" He shifted his dark gray eyes to one of the tables. "Pete took my apple juice."

I turned on the couch and glared at the man he was talking about. He was a tall latino with a scruffy beard and pony tail. He liked to think he ran this place and could pick on anyone that he felt was beneath him.

"Did he?" I scowled.

"Don't say anything, please." Carl begged. "It ain't worth it."

"Hey, you gotta stand up for yourself, dude. If you don't they'll ride you like a frickin horse." I stood from the couch and approached the table where he sat.

He glared up at me with dark brown eyes that were as cold as the winter outdoors.

"Whatdya want?" He asked.

"You been pickin on my boy?" I asked, crossing my arms. "Stealing his stuff again?"

He started to chuckle as his cronies joined in. "You gotta problem with that?"

I leaned forward with my hands on the table, getting right in his face. "Yeah, actually- I do."

His expression intensified as he tried his best to intimidate me- Which obviously didn't work. Before he could move I suddenly grabbed his head and slammed his face down to the table. When he fell backwards to the floor his nose was busted and bleeding down his face. I grabbed the juice box that hadn't been opened and tossed it to Carl before the orderlies grabbed me and dragged me back to my room.

* * *

Dean, Sam and Castiel followed the Doctor down the hallway as she glanced over their identification.

"And you said you saw her picture on the news?" She asked.

"Yes-" Dean answered, smiling his best fake smile. "Our sister has been missing for months, and when we saw the picture on the news- We knew it was her."

She stopped, turning to examine each man. "You do realize that if this is your sister here, she has no memory of you or her previous life? She was found on the side of the road by a police officer who she then tried to assault. And, since she's been here she's shown very violent tendencies."

Dean stifled back a snort. "That's my girl." He whispered.

"Excuse me?" The doctor glared at him.

"I said, that's very disturbing." He shook his head. "Our sister certainly isn't a violent person, Doctor."

"Tell that to the patient whos nose she broke yesterday." She arched her brows. "Normally we don't allow three visitors at once, gentlemen. You claimed all three of you are her brothers?"

"No-" Sam answered with his own fake smile. "Just myself and Dean. Cas here is Lara's fiance."

Castiel immediately shifted his eyes to Sam with a surprised expression.

"I see-" She looked questionable. "Well, you can wait in with the other family members. An orderly will bring Lara to you. But, I don't want you to get your hopes up when it concerns her, as I stated she has no memory, and with her violent outbursts... I'm not sure how she'll receive you."

She held her arm out to an open door and all three men stepped inside.

There were tables lining the floor, and several people were sitting with family members quietly conversing. Sam led the way to an empty table that was out of hearing range from anyone else and sat down. Dean did as well while Cas remained standing.

"Dude. Sit." Dean said. "Act normal."

"I can't act _normal_, Dean. This is an insane asylum." He replied gruffly.

"Yeah. And in case you forgot, Lara is stuck here in it. We'll get her out, we will. But in the mean time we gotta act _normal_."

Cas reluctantly sat beside him with a sigh, keeping his posture straight and stiff.

"Four months in this place." Sam sighed. "Poor kid. I don't know how she's handled it."

"She's tough as nails. Memory or not, apparently some of her instincts stayed with her. She's been kickin ass and takin names since she got here." Dean smirked.

"That's not a _good _thing, Dean." Sam replied. "The people here aren't monsters- So, kicking the crap out of some poor guy with mental problems isn't gonna motivate the Administrators here to let her out."

"We can't baby her, Sammy-" Dean rested his elbows on the table. "If we want her to snap outa this then we need to treat her like we always do. Which means, no spoon feeding her jello or playing soft soothing music-" He nudged Cas. "Any ideas yet what's made her lose her memory?"

"I'm beginning to come up with a few theories." He answered.

"Such as?"

"I don't think I'm comfortable discussing them just yet. I want to be certain that I'm right before making an observation."

Sam and Dean both noticed his tone, but it wasn't unusual. He had been in a bad mood since Lara disappeared.

* * *

When an orderly had told me that I had visitors of course I was uneasy. From what he had said, which wasn't much- Two men claimed to be my brothers, and the third my so called fiance. Somehow, I just couldn't buy that last part- Something told me that I was _not _engaged to be married. I was terrifying, men fled from me like rats from a burning building, who the hell would ever wanna marry me?!

He led me by the arm to the visitors room and once we stepped through the door I jerked my arm free.

My eyes scaled the room once and only once before they settled on three familiar faces. It was the men from the flashes. All three of them.

For a moment I could only stand there with my mouth slightly agape. When they caught site of me they stood in unison.

I warily approached, stopping in front of them on the other side of the table. Neither of them spoke, which was making chills shoot through me- So before either one of them could utter a word I pulled out my chair and sat down.

"Which one of you is Dean?" I asked.

They awkwardly sat and the pretty one in the middle cleared his throat.

"Uh. I am." He said with a raise of his hand.

Now I looked from gigantor beside him, to the other side where the one in the trench-coat sat.

"And you two?"

"I'm Sam." He said with a smile. "And, that's Cas."

"Cas?" I leaned forward. "You're Cas?"

He looked nervous, but just barely nodded. "Yes. It's good to see you again, Lara."

I crossed my arms and sat back with an arched brow. "And you two are my brothers?"

Sam and Dean both nodded.

"Comon, cupcake- Don't tell me you don't remember that?" Dean said with a smirk.

Hearing him call me cupcake instantly made me want to punch him in the adams apple, but not in a mean way exactly. It seemed almost endearing, and I could only assume that maybe in the past he had called me that pet name frequently.

"So anyone wanna explain to me what the hell happened and why I'm here?" I asked now.

"Uh-" Sam sighed. "Well, do you remember anything? Anything at all?"

"A little-" I shrugged, pulling out the notepad which I had hidden under my shirt. "Bits and pieces, flashes of faces and certain places."

"So that's how you knew my name?" Dean asked.

"Yeah, obviously, genius."

He rose both brows, passing a glance to Sam. "Least she still has her smart ass attitude."

I slid the notepad across the table to Dean who sat in front of me. He immediately started flicking through it, stopping once he hit the page covered in symbols- Then he slid it over in front of Cas.

"Enochian sigils." He said, almost shocked. "I'm surprised she remembered these."

"Are they important or something?" I asked, shrugging.

"If you want to ward yourself against angels, yes." Cas answered.

"Dude-" Dean rolled his eyes. "When I said act normal, I didn't mean start spoutin crap she wouldn't wanna hear."

"Angels?" My foot began to nervously tap under the table. "You mean, angel angels?"

No one seemed to know how to respond to that. But what was crazy is that the thought of warding myself against angels _didn't _sound crazy. Why did it seem like the most normal thing in the world to me? Not to mention that I wasn't the least bit uncomfortable, or intimidated around these guys. It felt normal as well. Like I could let my guard down, and not have to be ready to pounce and punch one of them in the nads just to ensure my pudding not getting stolen.

"Listen, kid-" Dean said. "There's some things you don't remember. Things that aren't very good and I'm sure you're not gonna like it. But, what we need for you to do is trust us, ok? We're your family and we're gonna get you outa here."

"Good luck with that." I shook my head. "In case you haven't noticed I've kicked the crap out of a few people, and I'm a danger to society."

"No you're not." Sam quickly intervened. "In fact, you're probably the least dangerous thing to society. You save lives."

Somehow that didn't seem that far fetched.

"Lara, what room are you staying in?" Cas asked.

"214, why?"

"For future reference." He replied, casting a glance to Sam and Dean.

Dean cleared his throat. "Ok, here's what's gonna happen. You're gonna go back to your room, behave yourself, and we're gonna get you outa here."

"Uh, how?"

"Don't worry about that. We have a way."

He stuffed my notepad in his jacket pocket, which for a moment made me panic.

"Ok, when?"

They all seemed surprised that I was just eagerly awaiting them to spring me from this place. But, somehow I trusted them. After all, I had seen their faces in my mind for months now. So while I might not have remembered them the way they wanted, at least I had some recollection of them.

"What time does everyone hit the hay around here? Is there a curfew?" Dean asked.

"Yeah, everyone has to be in their beds at 8."

"Ok then. Wait around until pretty late, maybe around midnight or so." He stood, followed by Sam and Cas. "And, just for the record. Don't freak out."

"Uh... Ok?"

Dean winked at me and Sam rounded the table and gave me a tight hug which instantly made me melt. Yet again, I had a feeling that happened often. Dean soon did the same, crushing me to the point I couldn't breathe. When he pulled away Cas stood there blank faced.

"What, no bye hug?" I asked sarcastically.

He shifted on his feet for a moment, not knowing what to do, but since the orderlies were gawking at us I pulled him into a hug. I was surprised that I held that hug much longer than I had intended, but I just couldn't pull myself away. Even more so was I stunned when tears clouded my vision. Who would have thought something like that would have had such an affect on me?

I made sure to blink them away before stepping back and pushing past them, heading back for my room without saying another word.

My mind was spinning, much like it always was now a days. But, the one thing that I wasn't anymore was lost. A few minutes with these strangers, who weren't really strangers at all, seemed to have washed away the past four months of living in confusion and anger. I knew there was much more I needed to learn, and try to remember somehow- But for the moment I was content with not being a Jane Doe, a Lizzie, or a Lucy. Apparently my name was Lara, and I was just fine with that.


	46. Chapter 46

I stared at the ticking clock on my wall with bated breath- Just watching the time move by so slowly. It was almost midnight, thank god- And I was waiting for the sounds of alarm bells showing that my break out was soon coming.

Really I didn't have any idea of how they were going to get me out of this place. Surely they weren't just going to bust the doors down and charge inside? Were they? Somehow that seemed like their characters. Something told me that they weren't the type of guys to ask for permission before doing something. Well, obviously they weren't, seeing is that they were busting me out of this prison like hospital.

I had been sitting on the edge of my bed for at least an hour, with my slippers still on and a hoodie near by. It was the only piece of clothing I had in this place that wasn't crazy people garbs, a gift from a nurse that felt sorry for me. I would be needing it, seeing is that the weather outside was frigid. My palms were sweaty, my heart racing, I couldn't help but nervously bounce my legs as I counted down the seconds. Five... Four... Three... Two... One...

Midnight.

Swallowing a knot in my throat I strained to hear anything over the wails of patients in rooms beside me, or the thumping of someones head against the wall. So far, no sirens, no alarm bells, which meant that they must not have gotten inside. I shuddered slightly when I felt a quick gust of wind at my back, along with what seemed like the flapping of what sounded like wings.

"Hello, Lara."

I swung around quickly, my heart leaping to my throat. It was Cas, just standing there as if he'd been in my room all along. Of course my eyes jumped to my door, which was still locked from the outside. For a second I actually thought I was hallucinating.

Standing now, I glanced around, wondering if there was a secret entrance to this room that I didn't know about. But of course there wasn't. All there was was my blank white walls, the one tiny window, and the door to my bathroom.

"Cas?" I took a weary step back. "How'd you get in here?"

"That would take too long to explain right now." He moved across the room, rounding my bed and stopping in front of me. "Before we go, there's something that I need to check. Don't worry, Dean and Sam are aware of the situation and gave me the "_ok"_."

My eyes shifted, wondering why he emphasized that one lone word in quotations.

"The ok for what?" I asked now.

He took me by the shoulders and forced me to sit again. "It might not work, I'm almost positive it won't- But, if it does, you might want to prepare yourself."

Uhh, what the hell was that supposed to mean? Was this some kind of weird come on?

We were interrupted when my door was kicked open and two orderlies stepped in. Two that happened to give me trouble nearly every single day. They were the type that liked to be overly rough with the patients, which resulted in dislocated shoulders or dark bruises on most people. Myself, however, had given them a hard time since the moment I stepped into this place. I didn't take their crap and had punched them more times in their bojangles than I could count.

I stood quickly, panicking- These two douchers were gonna ruin my chance at escaping.

"Now what do we have here." One man who was nick named Ace said. "An angel, and a mutant freak."

My face drained of blood as I looked up to Cas. He didn't seem the slightest bit intimidated by these guys and I couldn't understand why. These guys were huge, and combined had an extra one hundred pounds on the guy. Not saying that Cas was out of shape, but he alone couldn't have taken on these two men.

"I suspected as much." Cas said bitterly. "I had a feeling this place would be crawling with demons."

I froze after he uttered that.

"But I bet what you didn't expect was who sent us here to keep an eye on the bitch." The apparent demon went on with a grin. "Your good friend Crowley."

A shiny silver blade suddenly slid out of Cas' coat sleeve.

"It doesn't matter who sent you."

"Maybe not. But, neither of you are getting out of here. Especially the girl."

Cas reached over and lied a hand on my shoulder, and after a few seconds he pulled away with a grimace.

"Uhoh-" The second demon said. "Looks as though someone's clipped your wings."

Cas grabbed my wrist and yanked me to stand behind him as the two men charged at him. Within a matter of seconds though they were lying on the ground in a puddle of blood.

"What the hell is happening?" I asked, trying to catch my breath.

I should have been terrified by now- But... I wasn't. In fact, this seemed just as normal to me as tying my shoes.

Cas pulled me along with him out of my room and into the hall which was eerily silent. Normally there would be the sound of wailing patients or at least nurses and orderlies patrolling the area. But there was nothing, nothing but the howling winter wind outdoors.

"This place is surrounded." Cas said, as he dragged me. "Demons, more then likely angels as well."

"Where's Sam and Dean?"

"They're waiting outside, they sent me on without them. I suppose they figured I could handle the job myself- But we weren't aware of the filth roaming these halls."

"This might be a crazy question, but this is completely normal everyday shit when it comes to us, isn't it?"

We stopped at the end of the hall as Cas looked down both ways which led to even more patient rooms. He decided to go left instead of right- Which I knew led to the emergency stairs and cafeteria.

"Yes-" He finally answered. "Although there seems to be an over abundance of danger lately."

Well that's just wonderful. I go and get myself stuffed in a looney bin with no memories just when real monsters decide to come out of the woodwork.

He pushed the door open on the stairwell and went in first. I followed closely behind as we started down. My room was on the third floor, from what I had heard was referred to as the "violent" floor where only the most crazy and dangerous patients were stashed. Once we reached the second level we were yet again ambushed by more people. Or demons, really I couldn't tell the difference- All I knew was that several of them were dressed as patients.

I was pushed backwards into the wall by one woman, while Cas started swinging his knife and hacking them to bits. When I noticed him getting swarmed I punched the woman in the face that held me, and she stumbled backwards. Instincts I assumed kicked in now as I lunged at one particular man that was attempting to stab Cas with his own shiny knife. I wrapped my arms around the back of his throat and used all of my body weight to try and stop him, which resulted in the both of us tumbling down the stairs.

Thankfully I landed on top of him which broke my fall, and I quickly grabbed the knife from his hands and jammed it into his chest.

Finally, now I had a weapon!

After the last demon thumped to the floor we started down the stairs again finally making it to the first floor.

"Where are we going?"

"To find a way out. I have a feeling they've barricaded all of the exits, which means maybe a window." He answered.

"Sorry to burst your bubble, babe- But there's bars on the windows here."

"It doesn't matter."

Alrighty then, if he said so. But, iron bars on windows generally meant you wouldn't be getting out.

We entered the main area of the first floor, which was where the administrators desks and offices happened to be, along with patients rooms for the tamer and less insane people. There was also a large waiting room which was lined with barred windows. Cas quickly approached one and after handing me his blade reached up and took hold of the bars.

With a firm yank they suddenly pulled out of the wall, leaving cracks and crumbling dry wall behind.

"Dude... What are you superman?" I asked.

"No, of course not. I'm just an angel."

Well, I was inclined to believe him now, as crazy as it sounded.

He tossed the bars aside and before he could open the window we were suddenly tackled. I went crashing through the glass with another demon on top of me, Cas went I have no idea where. It was dark outside, but for the outdoor lights reflecting off the snow which didn't provide much comfort. I reached up and stabbed the demon in the neck, thanking whoever might have been listening that I hadn't lost the knife during the fall.

I mustered up the strength to shove the dead body off of me afterwards lying in the snow trying to catch my breath. Only when I attempted to sit up did I feel a sharp pain from my left side, and after glancing down and seeing a jagged piece of glass jammed into my ribcage, I started to panic.

"Oh shit..." I scooted back as well as possible through the snow and to a tree which I leaned against.

"Cas?" I called out, but heard no answer.

Thankfully the cold was numbing the pain, but it didn't stop the wound from bleeding out. There was some shrieking in the distance as well as what sounded like bones snapping before Cas rounded the tree and I sighed in relief.

"Good timing-" I grunted.

He crouched down beside me and examined the glass jutting out of my ribs.

"C-crazy idea-" I stuttered, my teeth chattering. "But maybe, hospital?"

He shook his head, then reached down and quickly ripped the glass out of my side. The shooting pain after that was enough to almost make me pass out.

"There's not time for that." He said.

He reached up with his index and ring finger and lied them against my forehead.

What happened after that was like a damn breaking inside my mind as a wall of thoughts came rushing through like a pounding river. In the equivalent of practically two seconds, the entire four months of wondering who the hell I was, and where I came from disappeared. Memories of my entire life were suddenly there as if they had always been there. Years, months, certain days that stuck out, all returned. When he pulled his fingers away, I fell forward slightly and he quickly caught me.

"Dude..." I cringed, blinking back the rush of emotions. "What the hell did you just do?"

Cas' eyes were wide, and he looked more surprised than I had ever seen him.

"I healed you." He answered.

"What?" I pulled my head out of my hands, glancing around the property. "But I thought you couldn't do that because of the spell?"

Suddenly this place seemed even more disturbing than before, now that I could remember my life, my name, who I was- I even more so wanted to get the fuck out.

"I couldn't-" He shook his head. "Had the spell still been completely intact then I wouldn't have been able to heal you. Lara... I know now what's wrong with you. The spell is dissolving."

I flew to my feet. "What?"

"I can't explain it now- We have to get to Sam and Dean."

We started running through snow banks and past a set of trees just adjacent to the parking lot. Past those trees I could see my brothers fighting with their own pack of demons. God... Crowley certainly went through a hell of a lot of trouble to set so many pieces of crap on us. Cas was clearly ticked off now, and he didn't hesitate to raise his hand and smite every single one of them. Afterwards, he zapped us away from this place and back to Bobbys.

* * *

I sat on the sofa with my arms wrapped around myself, trying my best not to have a major freakout. Dean paced anxiously in front of me, while Sam sat stone faced at Bobbys desk. Cas? He hovered in front of me like a buzzing insect that wouldn't go away.

"You're sure about this?" Dean asked, finally stopping.

"Yes-" Cas answered. "If the spell was still fully intact then I never would have been able to heal her."

"So," Sam sighed. "What are we supposed to do about this, huh?"

"We gotta stop it." Dean said with a certainty. "We can't let this happen."

"That's not really your call, Dean." Sam retorted. "I think Lara should be the judge of that."

They both peered at me as if I had some sort of coherent response. Which of course I didn't have, so I just remained silent.

"Cas-" Dean went on. He obviously assumed my silence meant I agreed with him. "What can you do to stop it?"

"Nothing-" His tone was unusual. "Sauriel had written down the incantation to recite for breaking the spell, but she gave no information on how it was originally cast. It was more that just a few words of Enochian, it had to have been."

"Well that's just friggin awesome." Dean began to stomp around again. "So we just sit back on our asses while Lara changes into a Seraphim?"

Silence after that question, and I only sat back and tried to keep my stomach from rolling. Ha, maybe I would have been better off stuck in the nuthouse with no memories after this bull-crap?

"No." Dean suddenly said. "We're not gonna let this happen. Lara, call Lee down here- If anyone is gonna have the answers then it'll be him."

Now I snickered but not out of amusement.

"Lee? You're actually wanting me to call Lee down here? What happened to him being a dick and a douche bag?"

"Oh, he's still that. But I can't exactly be picky right now, so call his ass down here."

"There's no need." Lee suddenly said from the doorway. "I could hear your ignorant baboon calls all the way upstairs."

I took my head into my hands and let out a quiet grumble at the already heated death stares he was giving Cas, and vice-versa.

"Well, nice timing douche bag." Dean scowled. "So you gonna give us a hand here, or what?"

Lee chuckled, moving into the den.

"What do you expect for me to wave a magic wand and suddenly it's all better? I'm sorry to disappoint you but it's not that simple. There's no way of stopping this from happening."

Everyone glared at him now and I was almost certain I was gonna puke.

"You're lying." Dean stated.

"Am I? Now why would I do that? What purpose would it serve me? In case you haven't noticed I've been going out of my way to watch out for her, I resurrected her didn't I?"

"Yeah-" Sams tone turned dark. "After you just sat back and watched her die."

"Yes well, we all make mistakes and I'll admit that was one of my own." He paused, looking to each of us. "But there really is no way of stopping the spell from dissolving."

"Why not?" Dean asked.

Lee arched his brows, smirking all the more.

"You daft little monkeys really have no idea? Really, Castiel- I would think you at least would have figured it out."

"Get to the point." Cas spat.

"To start, there would be no way of stopping the spell, or recasting it because it was specifically created by her Mother. Which means only she knew the proper incantation and preparations. When I resurrected Lara I assumed that I had gotten it pretty much accurate but I see now I was wrong."

"Ok, so- Can't you just create a new one in place of it?" Sam shrugged.

"No, it's complicated and that would be too simple a solution, right? And correct me if I'm wrong but when are things ever that simple when it concerns the Winchesters?"

"Got us there." Sam huffed.

Silence for what felt like the millionth time- And apparently Lee wasn't much caring for the way Cas was looking at him.

"I find it funny how you glare at me like a little heathen when I've done nothing to you." Lee said, the smirk fading. "For your information if it had not been for Lara choosing you then I would have reduced you to ashes ages ago."

Cas stepped forward, and I seemed to be the only one that _didn't _notice the threat in that statement.

"Uh, wait a second." I stood before they could start kicking the crap out of each other. "What do you mean by _choosing _him?"

Lee peeled his eyes away from Cas.

"How do you not understand by now?!" He stomped further into the room. "Sauriel wasn't just a Seraphim, she was _**the **_Seraphim. The first creation _ever _by God- She was at his side long before any other celestial being. Before me, before Castiel, long before humankind was ever even a notion in Gods mind!"

He obviously expected that to be explanation enough- But our blank faces said otherwise.

"Which meant-" He continued with an eye roll. "That she was his most prized. _Which meant_, because of that she was highly sought after. Archangels are jealous little buggers after all. So, he gave her a gift. Which was the ability to choose Guardians for herself. Whomever she wanted."

Deans arms were crossed, but he pulled out a hand and pointed from me to Cas. "So, you're saying that, what- Lara chose Cas as a Guardian?"

"Well, give the baboon a banana he finally got something right." Lee retorted, and Dean scowled. "Of course she did it unknowingly since she didn't realize she had that power."

I fumbled on my feet. "Ok, wait a second. How do you even know I did that?"

He stuffed his hands in his coat pockets, shaking his head.

"You left a mark, think of it as a brand that only other celestial beings can see." He then pointed to the area of his collar bone. "Right there for your information, Castiel." Cas of course looked down at his chest but could see nothing. "Think of it as a sign that reads, hands off, this angel belongs to me. Really, it is considered an honor and I wouldn't have an issue with it if I felt Castiel was actually deserving."

Everyone stopped, and started gawking at Cas' chest as though we could see this supposed brand.

"Say I believed you-" I said, skeptical. "But why _wouldn't _he be deserving?"

His face went blank, all traces of amusement were gone. "Because he's weak. In more ways than one. A proper Guardian shouldn't let emotions cloud his judgement, which he clearly does, and they shouldn't disappear on a whim whenever they please. And angel or not, he's just not strong enough. The guardians for your Mother were Seraphim."

"Yes and they apparently did an excellent job of protecting her." Cas said, his eyes squinted. "Since Michael slaughtered her."

Lees eyes widened slightly and he responded to that by rushing forward and slamming his hand against Cas' chest, which sent him flying backwards out the window behind the sofa. Lee disappeared after that, only to reappear outside where Cas had skidded to a landing.

"Dammit!" Dean said, rushing to the door. We all followed.

By the time we ran outside Cas had regained his footing and repaid Lee by sending him flying across the junkyard. Really, the only thing me and the boys could do was stand there and watch- Because if we tried to intervene somehow we'd end up getting crushed. That is, until Cas smashed into a junked out pick-up and stood again as his angel blade slid out of his coat sleeve.

"Uh-" Sam nudged me. "Maybe you should do something?"

"Me?! What the hell am I supposed to do?" The three of us stood stiff and only our heads followed as Lee flew through the air like a rag-doll. "God dammit..." I jogged to where their bitch fight was going down and starting screaming. "Knock it off you idiots!"

They ignored me of course, either that or were just too enraged to actually hear me. Before long Cas started taking swipes at Lee with his knife, but he avoided them without even batting an eye.

"Dude-" Dean yanked on my wrist. "Blow some shit up."

"Uh, what?" We all three ducked as a piece of wood from a pile went flying after Lee crashed into it.

"Do it, blow something up. Get their attention before they kill each other!"

"Yeah because like that's something I can clearly accomplish on my own because..." Another loud crash. "Ok, fine! I'll try!"

I took a step forward and let my eyes drift across random old vehicles, finally spotting a particular car that was still on wheels. I focused on it with everything in me, having not the slightest idea of how I would be able to accomplish anything. Nothing happened... So I tried again. I pictured the car in my mind, then imagined it on fire.

Like a bomb went off inside of it it suddenly exploded into a massive sized fireball. The shock of the explosion launched myself and brothers backwards until we thumped to a stop just in front of Bobbys porch.

I was sprawled on my stomach and grumbling from the pain as I worked the air back into my lungs.

"Good idea, moron." Sam said, cringing as he sat up with a large gash on his forehead. "Have her blow something up, yeah... Good plan."

The flames were practically sky high, but at least I didn't hear the two angels fighting any longer.

"Ok, bad idea-" Dean said, grunting his way back to his feet. "Don't listen to me next time, kid."

I garbled something incoherent with my face in the dirt before I felt someone yank me back to my feet.

Just my luck that someone happened to be Lee.

"Getting feisty are we?" He asked, frowning with a split lip. "Don't you know you don't go about using your abilities as if they were nothing?"

I yanked my arm out of his grasp as Cas hobbled forward. He was definitely in worse shape than Lee, his nose was bleeding, as was a deep cut above his right eyebrow and his left arm hanged limply at his side.

"Apparently we need to have a little discussion." Lee went on, dragging me back into the house as everyone followed.

Once inside he shoved my butt down on a kitchen chair and took a deep breath.

"For your information-" He started, directing his statement to my brothers and Cas. "Lara is not only a danger to herself right now, she's a danger to _everyone _around her. The spell is dissolving, which means her abilities are coming forth full strength and she hasn't any idea of how to use them. Why do you think she keeps disappearing? How she randomly appears in different locations with no explanation? Because she's a celestial being you asses, and that means she can as you say, _zap_, herself wherever she so chooses."

Dean looked dumbfounded to say the least, and well- I'm sure we all did right then.

"Ok, what else do we need to know?" He asked.

"That ten thousand acre forest fire wasn't just from someone discarding a lit match. Seraphims _purify _with fire, which means that power prematurely exploded. Didn't you even take that into consideration when she returned with her clothing completely singed and destroyed but she hadn't a mark on her?" He clearly directed that question to Cas.

"I had suspicions. For quite a while. But I didn't think the spell dissolving would have been the cause because I could still see her soul." He replied, wiping the blood from his face with his sleeve. "She saw my true form, which is something only a celestial being could do. It was what first roused my curiosity."

"Wait wait wait-" Dean held up his hand. "She saw your what?"

"Do you forget that I'm inside a _vessel_, Dean?" Cas rolled his eyes. "That morning we woke her and she started screaming, she told me it was because she saw a foreign face that wasn't my vessels. I only neglected to tell her that it was my true form she actually witnessed."

Dean turned and looked at me with arched brows. "Dude, what'd he look like?"

"That's irrelevant right now!" Lee shouted, forcing my mouth to slam shut. "It's lovely that you're all taking this so lightly, but you need to understand that she has no control over what happens. Which means, any little temper tantrum, dream or nightmare, or even just a random thought could slaughter an entire city. She could touch something, you-" He pointed to Sam and Dean. "Or you." Then Cas. "And you would be reduced to ashes."

Dean responded to that by moving across the kitchen and rifling through Bobbys drawers, pulling out two oven mitts and a roll of duct tape. He didn't give me a chance to move before he shoved them both over my hands and wrapped the tape around to keep them from falling off.

"Don't touch anything." He commanded.

I sat there with my oven mitted hands in the air completely blank faced. "What the hell am I supposed to do with these? I have lobster claws!"

Sam snorted out a laugh which cause Lee to frown. "Yes, yes this is all very amusing isn't it? I'm so glad you're taking this seriously. Those gloves won't do any good because like I said, with a thought she could burn everything in the vicinity of two hundred miles to the ground."

"Well what are we supposed to do then, huh?" Sam asked. "You said we can't stop the spell from breaking?"

"No, we can't-" Lee let out a huff of air, thought for a moment then nodded. "I'll return shortly. There's someone I need to speak with."

"Who?" Cas asked.

"God." Lee then vanished from the kitchen.

After he was gone I sat there with my hands in the air, while the boys only gawked at me.

"Wow-" Dean finally spoke. "We didn't see this coming."

"Yeah, and we should have." Sam sighed and sat down across from me. "So, Cas... A Guardian, huh?"

Now everyone gawked at him and he only shifted on his feet before replying. "I honestly had no idea."

"Neither did I apparently." I said, shaking my head. "This is some crazy fucked up shit right here." I glanced at the oven mitts on my hands. "Do I really have to wear these?"

"Yes-" Dean frowned. "Just in case."

"How am I supposed to pee with these things on? Or eat? Or drink? Or scratch myself?"

"Figure it out." Dean began to pace again.

At the mention of being unable to scratch, my face started itching, and I awkwardly tried to scratch it through the oven mitt.

"What I'd like to know-" I said after unsuccessfully scratching my cheek. "Is how I unknowingly chose Cas as a supposed Guardian?"

Dean moved towards Cas and tugged at his shirt collar until his collar bone was exposed.

"I don't see any brand."

"You're not a celestial being, Dean." Cas replied, jerking away and refastening his collar.

"Yeah that might have something to do with it-" Dean then nodded to me. "Can you see it?"

"How would I know?"

"You're an angel, or somethin."

"Technically she's a seraphim it is a completely different species of..."

"I get it-" Dean glared at Cas, interrupting him. "So, you saw Cas without his meat suit, huh?" He sneered and I knew exactly what was coming next. "Was he naked?"

"Oh for the love of god." I took my head in my hands, flinching momentarily when I forgot I was still wearing oven mitts. When I looked up Cas' face flushed red. "I don't know. I only saw his face for a split second."

"I don't think I'm comfortable with this topic of conversation." Cas fidgeted.

"Why? You self conscious about your _true form _or whatever?" Dean was having much more fun than I or Cas happened to be.

"Of course not. But it does make me a little uncomfortable. I'm accustomed to everyone only seeing me as my vessel. Sometimes I think that you often forget that this _isn't _how I normally appear."

"Guys-" Sam tried to blink away his surprise. "Uh, are you forgetting that we're kind of having an issue here? Remember? Lara turning into a ticking time bomb?"

"Wow, way to cut the tension there, Sammy-" Dean rolled his eyes. "I'm just tryin to keep her calm and keep her mind off of it. You're a little slow, try catching up."

Sam frowned. "Right... Sorry, but- Don't you think we should at least talk about this?"

"Why?" I asked. "It's not like there's anything we can do about it. Truth be told, since I'm so dangerous, your best bet would be to flee in the opposite direction as me so you won't get barbequed."

"And leave you alone? No way, cupcake." Dean shook his head.

"You guys are idiots-" I scowled. "This isn't just about watching out for your kid sister anymore. This is about making sure that I don't bake you to a crisp."

I rested my head on my oven mitts, staring out the window and at what was left of the smoking vehicle when Bobby finally entered the door.

"What the hell happened out there?" He asked. "I leave for two damn hours and I come back and the place is on fire-" He then noticed the window in the den. "And, my window is busted, balls- What did you idgits do now?"

"Long story short-" I sighed. "My spell is deteriorating."

He then noticed me sitting at the table. "Lara? Well I was gonna ask if they busted you out of the nuthouse... Wait, the spell is deteriorating?"

"Yeah-" Dean went on. "Spell's ditchin her, her powers are imploding into herself. It's why she's been zapping out and all the other weird shit that's been goin on."

"That don't explain the broken window and blown up car?" Bobby retorted, lying a pack of beer on the counter.

"I suppose I should take responsibility for that." Cas answered. "Leesander and I fought."

"Well next time, leave my house out of it." Bobby shook his head, muttering another "idgits" under his breath. "You ok, kid?" He looked at me.

"Wonderful."

"Oh, and apparently-" Dean said in a sarcastic tone. "Cas is Laras _Guardian_."

"Come again?" Bobby looked from me to Cas.

"She chose him, somehow-" Dean shrugged. "Branded him with a private property sign and everything."

"Dean..." I couldn't take my face out of my oven mitts.

A massive gust of wind filled the kitchen as Lee suddenly reappeared. Papers and other thing blew off of the table and counter tops before he stepped towards me.

"Jeez, can't you make a calmer entrance?" Sam said, scooping up the papers.

"Six wings, remember?" Lee replied. "It's a little difficult not to make it windy."

"So what did _God _say?" Dean asked, and for once I wished he would lose his attitude.

"Only that I was correct. Since Sauriel created the spell then there's no way of stopping it from dissolving." Everyone began to grumble. "But, I can slow the process down. That's the best I can do."

"Slow it down?" I asked. "How?"

"Does it matter?"

Dean nodded sarcastically. "Uh, yeah ya dick. It kinda does."

Lee sighed. "You know, one of these days I'm going to grow tired of your constant name calling and burn an appendage off of your body." He paused and Deans eyes widened. "I'll let you guess which one." Dean immediately shut up after that. "Now, in order to do this, you will need to come with me, Lara."

"To where?" I asked.

He ripped the oven mitts off my hands, throwing them in Deans face before pulling me off the chair.

"Somewhere safe, where you can't disappear again or catch something on fire."

"I suppose I don't get a say in this?"

He sneered. "You're right. You don't."

He immediately zapped us away after that.


	47. Chapter 47

Once Lara was gone Castiel as well fled Bobbys after Dean had ordered he find where Lee had taken his sister. He knew trying to search for her would be a fruitless attempt, since Leesander had taken her who knows where. It would have been completely pointless, but he still felt he should at least try. Leesander couldn't be trusted as far as Castiel was concerned. He was infuriating more than anything else, not to mention dangerous.

It was after searching practically every square inch of land that he decided wherever Leesander had taken her must not have been on earth. Which meant she was more then likely, currently in the box in heaven that she had been placed in after she died. A place where no other angel could find. Leesanders perfect hiding place.

When he finally came to a stop on the top of Tower Bridge in London, he tried to think of a way of somehow, maybe, taking Leesander out. No matter what might have happened, or how he claimed he was only trying to help Lara- He just couldn't believe it.

He wasn't surprised to hear a flutter of wings behind him, and as he turned, his fists clenched at seeing Raphael.

"What are you doing here?" He asked.

"Tick tock-" Raphael replied. "You're running out of time, Castiel. I think I've been patient thus far, don't you agree?"

"Leave, Raphael. I've told you, I will _not _join your side."

Raphael examined the scenery from so high in the air, pausing to glance at the city across the bridge.

"You will-" He went on, then smirked. "Can you imagine how surprised I was to learn that she was brought back? And here I thought that I was finally rid of Gods little abomination. Tell me, how did you manage it?"

"What are you talking about?" Not that Castiel didn't already know.

"Sauriels child, of course. The last I heard her soul was lost even to _you _after she died. So, I can't help but ask myself how? How did you bring her back?"

Castiel went stiff. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't lie, brother-" He took a few steps closer. "After she died the brand marked on you disappeared. And now, it's returned just as vibrant and brightly as before. Which means _she's _returned."

Castiel just barely let his eyes flick downwards and to the supposed mark that he wasn't lucky enough to see.

"She is not your concern, Raphael. This fight is between you and myself."

"I thought so as well, until I realized how stubborn you are. So I know now that the only way to motivate you to cooperate is to be rid of her yet again. Maybe if you watch her and her brothers choke on their own blood you will know now how serious I am."

He didn't wait for Castiel to respond before disappearing.

Castiel shifted on his feet a few good times, trying not to panic. It was just as he feared it would be. He couldn't linger around in the background while Raphael still rampaged all across heaven and earth. He needed to be stopped, and sooner rather than later. He didn't have the luxury of waiting anymore, which meant that hoping Heavens weapons could be found wasn't in the cards now. He had to instead return to his nemesis and hope that he would actually accept him back. Crowley wasn't known for being very forgiving after all.

* * *

I had been sitting on an empty park bench for the better part of two hours completely alone. The park trails around me, completely empty. The wind in the trees, the birds chirping and flying, was definitely not natural. They were so expertly choreographed that I knew instantly where I was at- Was not on earth. No... I was back in the damn box I had been in for nearly two years when I was dead. Only now, instead of looking at the old farm house I grew up in, I was in an obnoxiously and unnaturally beautiful park. No place that looked like this could exist on earth- It just wasn't possible.

My patience was wearing thin- Lee had pretty much ordered me to stay on the bench and wait for him to return, which is what I had been doing. I was getting hungry, and thirsty- And there wasn't exactly anything to eat here in this stupid place.

I leaned forward and tapped my fingertips on my knees, staring off at the scenery and feeling myself get even more ticked off.

This was annoying- The least he could have done was friggin tell me where he was jetting off to before ditching me. But no, I suppose that was too much to ask from the a-hole. Dean was definitely right. Lee was a douche bag.

When he finally returned an hour later he was carrying a satchel that jingled when he sat it down on the bench.

"What's that?"

"Ingredients." He answered.

"Ingredients? You've been out shopping this entire time and just left me here?"

He stopped, glowering over me. "Shopping? Lara, for your information some of these items haven't been seen in nearly a millennia- Do you know how long it actually takes to sniff out extinct herbs from the thirteenth century?"

I arched my brows. "Wow. Where'd you come across that?"

"I had to go back in time a little bit, notice the horse shit on my shoes?" He pointed to his alligator shoes and the smelly remnants of his time travel.

"Whoa. That sucks. Hey, I didn't know you could time travel?"

"I am a heavenly creature after all. I do that have ability." He started sifting through the satchel.

"_Soo_. What else you got in there other than some extinct herb?" I asked.

He pulled out a small stone bowl, lying it on the bench.

"A little of this, a little of that."

"Wow. Insightful-" I rolled my eyes. "Comon, what's in the bag?"

He removed four small glass vials now. One, which held what looked like the herb he was talking about. The other three, I had no clue. There seemed to be some kind of white dust in one, a pencil thin piece of charred bone in the second, and the third looked like swirling gold liquid that shimmered in the faux sunlight.

"What is all that crap?"

"That _crap_, as you call it, is what's going to help slow down the dissolving of your spell, darling." He answered.

"Ok, well. I know the herb, but what about the others?"

He looked at me with his striking blue-green eyes. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you, and technically I'm not _allowed _to tell you. So just sit tight and hold your knickers and let me do my work, aye?"

I frowned in an obvious pout. I hated things being kept from me, especially if it was some super secret ingredients for a spell. It only roused my curiosity all the more since he was refusing to divulge their secrets.

"The one looks like a bone-" I said, and he stood up straight and glared at me. "Am I right?"

He flattened his lips into a thin line. "Do you want this done or not?"

"Fine." I took a step back, making a grimace at him after he turned away. "Carry on." I swung my arms back and forth, staring up at the unnaturally bright blue sky. "So can I ask questions if it doesn't pertain to the crap in the vials?"

"I suppose. As long as it won't annoy me."

He began removing candles from the satchel and arranging them on the ground in a giant circle.

"So, how exactly did I choose Cas as my guardian?" Was my first question.

"Instinct-" He answered. "You trusted him, held him on high regards, he was a willing recipient. Ta-da you've got yourself a guardian."

"But, neither of us even knew it was happening, how could he be a willing recipient?"

"Because he holds you on high regards as well."

"You suck at explaining things you know?"

He paused only long enough to shoot daggers at me with his eyes. "Forgive me for not bringing out the massive sized history books on Sauriel and how she achieved her goals, Lara- But I'm a tad bit busy."

He started lying out the candles again, seeming to not approve at how they weren't completely even and started all over.

"Why exactly do you hate Cas so much anyways, huh? Yeah, maybe he's not the strongest angel in heaven, but he's still a good guy. And you give him a hard time."

"He's a cretin." Was his reply.

I stood tall and narrowed my eyes at him. "Why?"

"Because he makes stupid and hasty decisions, and another- He blindly follows you and your baboon assed brothers around like a bloody dog on a leash. And another-" He stood, and shrugged. "He got you killed."

"You got me killed too you asshole!"

"Those were my orders, and, _I'm _not your guardian."

Yeah, thank god for that. I don't think I could tolerate him for longer than a few hours at a time. He was lucky the pretty part of his face wasn't imbedded underneath my fingernails by now.

I took a few deep breaths trying to calm down. "How exactly did he get me killed?"

Once he had strategically placed the candles in the circle, he moved the stone bowl to the center, clapped his hands together- And suddenly the bright sun filled day changed to pitch dark night with a full moon above. I flinched slightly as he rose a hand and every candle lit in unison.

"As I said, he follows you blindly. He should have known that the mission where you were going to Lucifer was a trap." He shrugged. "He didn't. Because his head is in the clouds. He's young, and immature and has a lot to learn."

"Funny, from what I gathered Cas is thousands of years old."

"Oh really? Well I'm far older than that." He grabbed the vials now. "Cas is pretty much the equivalent of an eighteen year old male in human years. So, as I said. He's young, and stupid, and makes even more stupid decisions."

"You're just mean. Yeah, maybe Cas has made some mistakes, but jeez, he's also made some really smart decisions too. He's saved our asses more times than I can count. Doesn't that matter to you?"

He quickly shook his head with a sarcastic expression. "No, not really."

Grumbling, I crossed my arms continuing to pout. "Ok, so. Since it's apparent you loathe Cas with the heat of a thousand suns, maybe I should just change the subject."

"That would be lovely, thank you." He motioned me over. "Move into the circle please."

I stepped over the candles, careful as to not catch my crazy pants on fire. It irked me that I hadn't been able to change out my hospital garbs yet.

"So after this spell is over and done with. Does that mean all of the freaky shit that's been happening to me will stop?"

He crouched down and started dumping the contents of the vials into the stone bowl.

"To an extent-" I opened my mouth to respond to that but he held up a finger. "_What _I mean by that-" He continued. "Is that you won't become grievously ill again, you might still have the headaches and nausea, but you won't have to deal with the coma. As far as everything else, well- You might still zap yourself from time to time but it will become less frequent. And, when it concerns your smiting abilities, those will be blocked until the spell has completely dissolved." He motioned to the ground in front of the bowl. "Sit."

"I guess that's better than nothing." I replied, sitting down cross legged in front of the bowl. "So, what's my time frame, huh? How long until the spell dissolves completely?"

He pulled what looked like an angel blade from his jacket, only it was far more elaborate. Elaborate in the sense that it held crimson red jewels on the hilt. He grabbed my hand quickly and cut a deep gash in my palm which caused me to yelp in surprise. Then he allowed the blood to dribble down into the bowl.

"That all depends on you-" He finally answered. "You're a highly emotional creature, Lara- You allow your heart to do the thinking instead of your mind. Which makes you weak. If you remain strong willed, and not allow your anger to get the better of you- It very well could be decades, possibly even longer than that."

"Fuck... I'm screwed."

He sneered at me. "Yes, well. If you want me to give an accurate guess- I would say, maybe. Five years if you're lucky."

"Five years-" I breathed out. "That's it?"

"It should be enough time for you to strengthen yourself, at least to the point that when it does finally dissolve that you won't be smiting everything in site by accident."

"And I strengthen myself... How?"

His eyes shifted upwards, but his head didn't move. "Well, this sort of situation has never happened before. You're the first mixed breed Seraphim ever in existence. But, if your Mother were here, and she were going to answer that- She would probably say to rely on your family, and your Guardians if you have more than one."

"Family? My brothers don't know jack squat..."

"I wasn't talking about them. I was talking about myself. I'm the only other Seraphim to exist, remember?"

Maybe so. But I didn't necessarily like the guy, which meant I couldn't be a team player- And I wasn't exactly too keen on considering him "family".

"So I need Obi-wan to teach me how to master the force." I said. "And, no one else is qualified, but you?"

He shrugged. "Castiel has never been trained for this sort of thing."

"Neither have you."

"Perhaps not. But, I am familiar with the purification abilities... Just a tad." He winked.

"But... We hate each other?"

"That might be so. But, be that as it may, it doesn't mean I want the last of my kind going and getting herself killed."

Once he was through making me bleed into the bowl, he ran a fingertip over the wound and it healed instantly.

"So, after the spell finally does dissolve... What happens to me? In particular, the _human _side of me?"

"It will cease to exist."

I blinked a few times over. "All of it?"

He gave me an "are you daft" expression. "Yes, _all_ of it. That's the difference between our kind, and angels. When Angels breed with a human you get a mutant creature called a Nephilim. With us, you get pure perfection." He sat down as well now on the other side of the bowl. "Now, shut up and let me finish this."

He started to grind the ingredients together with a pestle that seemed to have appeared from out of no where. Once he was through he sat up straight, closed his eyes, and went completely dead quiet and still.

He was silently mouthing something to himself, and I had no idea what it was. And after several long minutes of me getting impatient, he finally lifted his hand with the remaining vial that held the shimmering gold liquid. Without opening his eyes he popped it open, and poured it into the bowl and instantly every candles flame shot feet up in the air. I jumped slightly at the site of it but didn't budge or try to move. Before long a pale gray fog began to rise from the bowl and encircle me and I froze where I sat, only allowing my eyes to move and watch it as it seemed to have a life of its own. It completely surrounded me before it shot with forcefulness straight into my chest.

For a moment I choked back a breath of air, as my insides felt like they were being liquified. But it only lasted a few agonizing seconds before finally fading away.

Afterwards Lee opened his eyes, slapped his hands together and the sky returned to sun filled.

"Done." He said, standing.

"Done?" I forced myself back to my feet. "That's all? That was all of it?"

"What were you expecting? Thunder strikes and lightning bolts? This is a spell directly from God, it doesn't have to be something monumental to mystify you. We needed it done in a hurry, and it was."

"Yeah, but still... I expected something a little greater than that if it came from God himself."

"Believe it or not, but he's not flashy." He gave me a smirk.

I sighed, expecting to feel some kind of physical or emotional change- But I felt exactly the same as ten minutes before hand.

"Ok, so, if that's all- Can I go home now?" I asked.

"Typical. I risk my ass for you and I don't even get a thank you."

"Thanks-" I chewed the inside of my cheek awkwardly. "Yeah, thank you. Really, I mean it."

"Hm, well that will do I suppose. Alright, I'll send you back. And try to take my advice, Lara. Keep your emotions in check."

"Yeah I'll try, Obi-wan. But I think we both know how that'll go."

He gave me an eye roll and before lying his fingertips against my forehead, paused and said.

"Oh, by the way. In order to kill The Mother of All... You need Phoenix ashes."

"Wha..."

That's all I got out before he zapped me back to Bobbys.


	48. Chapter 48

Cas hadn't come back for nearly three days- Which normally wouldn't be a cause for concern since he was always flitting off for sometimes days at a time. But, considering the recent turn of events, and his previous extra curricular activities it was kind of hard not to freak out. Yeah, he had promised that he had given up on his search for Purgatory- And had even went to Crowley to tell him the deal was off, but still... There was a knot in my stomach that I just couldn't force away. And, since I wasn't sure what was causing it, I hadn't informed Sam or Dean that Lee had given us the answer we had been looking for- Which was how to kill Eve.

Cas had proven that he had been spying on us, and there was just no way of knowing if he was still doing it. I couldn't risk telling my brothers this new found information just in case Cas was eavesdropping again. So, since I was forced to keep this a secret for now it was driving me insane. Especially since we were planning on going for the next location in line where Eves monsters were being stored. During the months that I had been stuck on the crazy train they had to go to the second building without me. Which, according to Dean didn't go very well. It was stuffed full of demons, far more than the last time, since Crowley had really upped the security after we raided his first monster cage. I had no doubts that this time around would be exactly the same.

Which meant we needed Cas with us. Because let's face it, sure my brothers and I could accomplish a butt load, but there's nothing like having Cas there with his smiting abilities.

After Dean prayed to him a total of five times he finally returned, and the second he poofed into the room I somehow knew, yet again...

He had been compromised.

It shone all over his face, practically gleamed from his eyes like a guilt filled message. For the moment Sam and Dean hadn't noticed it, but I don't know- Maybe it had something to do with him being my supposed Guardian, or maybe I was just better at reading the angel than my brothers, but yes... He was hiding something from us yet again.

"So-" Dean said. "Lee did some god like angel magic on Lara... Supposedly it's gonna slow down the spell from dissolving."

He nodded towards me. "I'm happy to hear that."

"Yeah?" I glared at him. "Well, I guess we can count on Lee for _something_ every now and then. Of course, there's really no way of knowing if it worked. I guess if I suddenly implode into a fireball, or zap to Newfoundland then, yeah... Maybe it's not so potent."

Cas was wondering already why I was back to being snippy with him, I could tell. Like I said, I could read that guy like a friggin book now. I was pro at it.

"How's things going upstairs, Cas?" Sam asked now, still neither of my brothers were the wiser of what Cas was hiding.

"Hectic-" Cas answered, turning away from my dagger eyes. "Raphael has turned several of my garrison against me."

"Damn-" Sam gave him his usual sad puppy eyes. "So, how many do you have left?"

"Not many, which is unfortunate. The reason why I haven't come back here sooner was because I've sent those who are still with me in search of Heavens weapons."

"Without us?" Dean was taken aback. "I thought we were gonna do that together?"

"I'm sorry, but I couldn't afford to wait. With what we're doing here in trying to rescue Eves children and finding a way to kill her, I didn't think you could do it."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence." I scowled, standing from the couch. "Hey, Dean- I'm about ready to gnaw my own arm off from starvation. I nominate you to come help me fetch the food this time."

He glanced at his watch, realizing that I was right about food. It was lunch time, and the dude needed his pie so overall it wasn't hard to convince him to go with me.

"I'm driving." He said, which was a no brainer. When did he _not_ drive?

"Sammy you want anything?" I asked.

"Just the usual, kiddo." He didn't bother to look up from his laptop and Cas was clearly drifting off in his own little world. So luckily I don't think he was suspicious of my sudden wants for grub.

"We'll be back." Dean said, heading for the door after grabbing his jacket.

We stomped through snow drifts until hopping into the impala. He fired up the engine, flicked on the radio and immediately starting singing obnoxiously to Highway to Hell while pounding his hands on the steering wheel. Yeah, I hated to be a buzz-kill and ruin his good time but this was the only opportunity I had to talk to him alone and knowing for sure that Cas wasn't spying on us.

So I waited five minutes, and just as another rip roaring oldie came blasting on the radio and he continued to sing, I reached over and flicked it off.

"Pull the car over." I said.

"Wait, what?" He looked at me a good five times. "You car sick?"

"No, I need to talk to you. Now. Pull over, hurry up."

He squalled the tires as he jerked the wheel over and we pulled to the side.

"What's goin on?"

I let out a deep breath. "First of all- You need to know that this is extremely hard for me to say, and if I wasn't absolutely one hundred percent positive I would never bring it up, understand?"

"Uh... Yeah, ok? What's up, kid- You're freakin me out."

"Ok, well-" I swallowed a knot in my throat. "The day that Cas decided that he was gonna give up on Purgatory, remember?" He nodded, waving his hand for me to go on. "Well, I was outside and he showed up, spouted some things that were suspicious and I realized that he had been spying on us."

His face fell flat. "What?"

"Yeah- I confronted him, he admitted it, of course he claimed it was for whatever friggin reason he thought justified those actions, but anyways. I chewed him out and that's when he decided to stop working with Crowley." He was pissed already, his hands were gripping the steering wheel so tightly they were shaking. "Anyways, don't ask me how I know, because I couldn't explain it- But, I think... I think he's hiding something from us again. I think he might have fired up that deal again with Crowley."

"What makes you think that?"

I rolled my eyes. "Ugh, I told you not to ask me how I know. It's just a feeling. I can read it all over his naive little baby face. Who knows, maybe it's got something to do with me being Seraphim, or him being my "guardian", or whatever- I don't know. But, I can just tell. And trust me, I wouldn't have said anything on just a lingering suspicion. Telling you this is killing me right now."

He moved his eyes back to the road where we were parked, and I noticed the muscles in his jaw twitch a good three times before he suddenly started slamming his hands down on the steering wheel.

"Dammit!" He snapped. "That stupid little... What the hell is he thinking?! Is he crazy?!"

I couldn't bring my eyes up from my lap, I felt so incredibly guilty. Like I had just betrayed my very best friend when in actuality, it was the other way around. It didn't matter though, it didn't make the pain any less horrible.

"You're sure about this?" He looked at me, nudging my arm. "Lara, look at me." I warily looked up. "You sure? Without a doubt?"

I nodded. "Yes."

"Cause we can't take action if you aren't one hundred percent sure."

"I'm sure, Dean. I wish I wasn't, believe me."

He huffed out an angry breath of air before reaching into his jacket and pulling out his flask. He took a few long gulps before whacking me with it. I gladly took it and chugged down more than half in one breath.

"What are we gonna do, Dean?" I asked, finally.

"I wish I knew..." He pursed his lips and refused to look at me. "Apparently talking to him again is out of the question. If he didn't listen to us the last time, he won't this time either."

"There's something else..."

He grumbled and lied his head on the headrest. "What?"

"When Lee took me up to the box to preform the spell. He told me how we need to kill Eve. He said we need Phoenix ashes."

"Phoenix ashes?!" He looked stumped. "What the hell? There's actually such a thing as a Phoenix?"

"I guess so."

"Why didn't you tell me this three friggin days ago?"

Was he really this dimwitted? "Uh, because, like I said- Cas has been spying on us. I didn't think it would be wise to announce I had the way to gank Eve, because ya know, Cas probably wants to prevent that from happening?"

"Oh, right-" He ran his hand through his hair.

Dean obviously looked defeated. Here we thought Cas had finally turned back to our side and now this? It wasn't exactly something to dance a jig over. He was our friend, some closer to him than others- Which meant that since we were now forced to consider him an enemy... Yeah, you get it. Not cool.

"Ok, here's what we'll do-" Dean said. "We're gonna go on this mission- Take out the demons, rescue Eves children, then when we get back we're gonna have a little intervention."

"Intervention?" I laughed. "You really think that will work?"

"No-" His voice was sullen. "But we gotta try. Give him an ultimatum. It's either us or that dick Crowley. He's gotta make a choice here, Lara."

And I think we both knew how that would go. Cas wasn't exactly the type of dude that fancied much the idea of being backed into a corner. Especially if it concerned something he was dead set on. So... This meant, we were going to lose Cas. _I_ was going to lose Cas- And no amount of preparing ones self for something like that would make the blow any softer.

Dean cranked the car back into drive and headed towards town. We were going to keep acting normal for the moment, which meant we were gonna grab our food, go back to Bobbys- Eat it while Cas went on in merry ignorance, poke jabs at each other- And then finally go off on this mission. Sam wasn't going to be let in on the news just yet, because we had no way of letting him know it. It would be whenever Cas would decide to flit off again that we would somehow figure out a way to fill Sam in. Then, after that, it would turn into a way of seeking out a Phoenix to gank, wherever the hell they might have been- All the while trying to keep Cas in the dark until we decided to confront him.

Yeah, this was going to be a butt load of fun.

We didn't speak the rest of the drive back to Bobbys, and once we stepped back in the house I immediately went into the kitchen to eat, trying my best to ignore the awkward tension in the house now. Cas was still standing in the den, and I knew that if he tried to talk to me then I was gonna blow. I wasn't the best at holding back my temper, and this situation was only firing me up to the point of lashing out until my fists were bruised and battered from pounding on his face.

* * *

Hacking, slicing, blood spray- Agony filled wails, Cas going all smite town on the demons and for an instant- As we paused through the chaos and glanced at each other, it felt just like old times. For an instant, I had momentarily forgotten what was happening with him- For that one split second in between the fighting and killing my mind had flitted off to the good old days. The days where my brothers and I could trust him. But it only lasted that short second, one blissful second where I could just consider him my friend before another swarm of monsters we rescued came rushing down the hallway towards their escape.

Dean and Sam waved their arms, shooing them towards the exit as a few more demons came charging at us.

I readied my weapon and took one on full force as he swatted at me and I crashed into the wall. But I didn't even feel the blow as I ran at him and knocked him backwards to the ground slicing his throat with my angel blade.

Dean reached me before anyone else could and dragged me back to my feet.

"Comon, kid-" He pulled me with him. "We got another floor to take care of."

"Dean?" Cas said but Dean turned and glare at him.

"Go with Sam." He ordered, not asked. "Lara and I can handle it."

He was confused, not understanding that since the moment we raided this building why Dean had been so cross with him, and wouldn't allow him to assist me. Dean wasn't being very stealthy in the fact he was making it evident that he wanted Cas no where near me, especially alone.

We started up a set of decrepit metal stairs, this building was an old insane asylum, go figure, just what I wanted to traipse through right now. Each old room had been transformed into more cells slammed closed with thick metal doors.

I started down them in the same daze I'd been in since walking into the building, ripping them open and setting free the creatures inside. Most were well past the point of walking on their own, so I actually dragged them out and down the hall, leaving them at the stairs. The rest that weren't trying to bite my head off fled on their own. Of course, a few that were pure blood-suckers tried to make a meal out of Dean and I. Those were the ones we cut down. There was no helping monsters like that. For the most part, we were making good progress, and any demon that might have crossed my path was killed instantly. I didn't even notice that sometime during the dozens of scuffles I had been cut up pretty badly on my arms. Not to the point of bleeding to death, but it would of course require stitches. Somehow, I just couldn't find it in me to give a crap about that.

Honestly I didn't even feel the blows and didn't care about running straight into the line of fire as we fought the demons. Dean kept screaming at me, telling me to stop but I didn't hear, or simply just didn't care. It was time for my brothers to realize that in times of distress or when I felt particularly helpless I just didn't give a shit about anything, myself included. I would become reckless and the thought of getting myself torn to pieces didn't faze me. Not exactly a very healthy way to manage your emotions. I was failing already in what Lee had told me to do. Keeping my emotions in check? Ha, fat chance.

Once the building was clear and Dean and I returned downstairs to where Cas and Sam were, Dean didn't hesitate to give me a shove until I was backed into the wall.

"You wanna explain to me just what the hell that was up there?!" He shouted in my face, yeah- He was definitely going to tare me a new one.

"What _what was_, Dean? I was doing the job!" I snapped back.

"No! What you were doin was... I don't even know how to describe it. You tryin to get yourself killed?!"

"Hey,-" Sam stepped between us while Cas looked baffled. "Calm down, what's goin on?"

"Ask her." Dean pointed at me. "Goin all friggin kamikaze up there trying to get herself ripped to fucking shreds!"

"Just leave me alone, Dean. I'm fine." I pushed away from the wall and started for the exit but he chased after me.

"Hey!" He grabbed my wrist. "We're not done talkin about this."

"Fuck off!" I gave him a sharp shove and he slammed into Sam.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" He didn't seem angry so much as concerned now.

My eyes flitted off to Cas who seemed just as concerned. Dean noticed where my eyes went and seemed to give me a silent expression of understanding.

"Just leave me alone, guys. Seriously-" I started for the door. "I'm finding my own car to drive back. I want to be by myself."

Cas tried to follow after me but Dean grabbed his arm. "You heard her, dude. Leave the chick alone."

They did follow me out of the building but didn't try to stop me as I left the darkness of the building and started walking towards the city lights in the distance. I was surprised that Dean let me go so easily. Yeah, it was dangerous blah blah. But I could take care of myself, especially if I was in one of these moods. It was better for their own sanity to just leave me be and let me work through this on my own, which I planned to do over several shots of tequila.

It took about an hour to make it into town, and once there I started down the not so busy streets until coming to a bar that was bursting at the seams. Music was blaring from the inside, lights were streaking across the pavement through the windows. Not quite my type of place, but I didn't care as long as it had something to drink- Which it obviously did.

When I stepped inside the bass of the music practically rumbled my insides, the lights were enough to cause an epileptic episode- But I moved over to the crowded bar and slid onto an empty stool.

A woman with dark hair and black smokey eyeshadow came over and smiled at me.

"What can I get you?"

"Tequila, and don't skimp on it." I answered.

She asked for my I.D which I quickly flashed and pretty soon I had downed three shots- After three more I expected for everything to begin to turn numb, but it didn't- In fact, it was only making it worse. No, getting shit faced certainly wasn't going to help the situation, but under the circumstances what other choice did I have? After an hour I lost count of how many drinks I'd had, and when I noticed a man slide into the stool beside me I let out a grumble.

"Hey." He said.

"No." Was my immediate reply.

"But, I was..."

"No." I glared at him.

He was clearly pissed off now at my blatant shoot down, muttered something offensive about my sexual orientation and drunkenly wobbled his way back into the crowd. My phone started to vibrate in my pocket and I pulled it out noticing a text from Dean.

_Just wanting to check up on you, kid. Let me know what's goin on._

I rolled my eyes and quickly turned off my GPS, cursing myself for not having done it sooner then slid my phone back in my pocket.

"You need me to call you a cab, hun?" The bartender asked.

I wobbly looked up at her, then shrugged. "Might as well after another shot."

She shook her head and poured me another one and I had a feeling I was about to have a _Cheers _moment.

"Wanna talk about it?" She asked.

What was with bartenders thinking they were registered shrinks? Or were they just that hard up for tips that they would show compassion to any drunk idiot?

"Not especially." I answered.

She smiled, grabbing a stool and scooting it over to sit in front of me. "So, what's his name?"

I glanced around, noticing the bar had somehow cleared during however long I was here. But for a few people lingering at far away tables, it was just me and the bartender.

"Who's name?"

She snickered. "The guy that's got you here trying to drink away the blues."

"Ah-" I slurped down my last shot. "Well, that doesn't really matter now I guess."

"Another girl? I can kinda tell the look."

I shook my head. "No, it's not like that. He's just my friend."

"Right-" She poured herself something to drink now. "And that's clearly why you're on your way to a drunken stupor right now. So what did this _friend _do to you?"

"Trust me, you wouldn't wanna know. He's just on a slippery slope and doesn't seem to give a shit."

She leaned forward with her elbows on the bar, and for an instant I could have swore she looked familiar. There was something about her eyes that I had seen before, but that of course could have been the booze. She was unnaturally pretty with long black hair and completely perfect skin. First instincts would be to freak out, because no normal human could look like that- But, since I was practically falling off of my bar-stool, at the moment I just didn't care if she could have been a monster, an angel, a demon, or whatever.

"Well, since you don't want to tell me what happened, which I can respect- It's not any of my business, can I at least give you a little advice?"

What choice did I have but to nod.

"This guy obviously means something to you, maybe more than you're letting on. And, if he's in trouble, which he must be by what you did say, don't you think you should at least try to help him? Why give up on him and sit in this dump getting drunk off your ass when you could be out there giving him a helping hand?"

I arched a brow at her, seriously- Who was this chick?

"Trust me, I've tried to help him. But, it doesn't matter, he won't listen."

"Maybe you haven't given him what he needs to stop whatever it is he's doing?"

I had no response to that, because I didn't know what it would take to get Cas to stop what he was doing. If I did, then I would have done it ages ago.

"You'll figure it out-" She said, as if she read my mind. "Don't worry. I'll call you that cab now."

She smiled at me and left me bewildered as she hopped on the phone and called my cab. Within ten minutes it was waiting out front and I hobbled my way to the door. Before walking out I turned back towards the bar, but she was gone...

What the hell?

I tried to shake it off, telling myself that she had just gone in the back of the building, or whatever even though every instinct inside of me told me that whoever that woman was, she couldn't have been human. After practically falling to my cab I asked to take me to the nearest motel and struggled to stay conscious in the backseat as my pocket vibrated again.

Another text, only now it was from Sam.

_You're freakin us out, Lara. Just please tell us if you're ok? _

I sighed and finally texted back. _I'm fine. _

_You turned off your GPS._

_Yeah one tends to do that when they don't want to be found, dumb-ass._

_Ok well we're heading back to Bobbys. Just hurry up and head home._

I said nothing more and climbed out at another sleezy motel, got a room, fell inside and onto the bed passing out.


	49. Chapter 49

I spent two drunk days in that motel room, pretty much just laying on that bed staring at the ceiling. My brothers had texted me practically fifty times, which I very rarely replied to. They tried calling me, I refused to answer. Cas even called me a few times and I ignored them. For the moment I just needed to be left alone to figure things out. Which, I was slowly starting to realize that I had days ago and just didn't want to admit it. Whatever crazy bartender lady was trying to drill into my head obviously hadn't worked, because clearly she didn't understand the situation, so she wouldn't have known that there couldn't be something I could give Cas to stop him.

No, like I said, I knew what needed to be done- And we were well past helping him. So, when I got a text from Dean which were two little words, my stomach dropped to my feet.

_It's time._

I let out a sigh, staring at the screen for a good ten minutes before finally replying.

_What do I have to do?_

_Call him, get him to come there. Bring him to the address Sam sends you, we'll take it from there. And remember, kid- He can't know what's happening._

_Got it._

I quickly erased my texts, letting out a deep breath, forcing myself to sit up with a headache that felt like my skull was splitting in two.

"Cas." I said. "If you can hear me, do you think you could zap on over here?"

I actually hated hearing the flutter of his wings and the gruff Hello he gave me. A part of me wished that he never would have showed up, maybe then I would never have to face what was coming.

"Lara, you don't look... Well." He stated, leaning over and looking at me.

"Yeah, well- That's what three days of solid drinking can do to you." I said, attempting to stand. "I think my head is going to explode."

"Maybe I can help with that." He said, walking over and lying his hand against the side of my face.

Yeah, it helped, like the wind came and carried it away every ounce of pain disappeared, my dizziness and nausea subsided. When he gave me the slightest of smiles it was all I could do to not start screaming.

What if I was wrong? What if I had made a horrible horrible mistake? What if he really wasn't working with Crowley again and I had just imagined the entire thing?

"Thanks." I said, and he nodded. "Much better."

I turned away and went in search of my pants, which I only just realized were missing. That's what happens when your drunk, things go missing and quite often at times it was articles of clothing. I finally found them halfway buried under my blankets and started shoving my legs in while Cas, ever the gentleman, turned and stared blankly out the window.

"Everyone was worried-" He said, which made me pause. "No one knew what to think of your outburst." He barely glanced at me from over his shoulder. "I suppose that solves the mystery of where your anti possession tattoo is positioned."

I couldn't help but see him smirk and I scowled. Over the months Dean and Sam were nagging at me to get myself tatted up but I insisted I already had one, it just wasn't within view. Yeah, ok, now Cas knew- It was near the area of my pelvic bone. There goes my thought of him being a so called "gentleman".

"As far as the _outburst _goes-" I said, zipping up my jeans. "I just had some issues I needed to work through."

"And did you?"

"Not really, no. I still feel like shit, but I do know what to do at least."

"Does it have to do with Sam or Dean?"

I shrugged, trying my best to lie. "That obvious, huh?"

My phone started vibrating and my stomach twisted into knots.

The beginning of the end...

I walked over as nonchalantly as possible and then sighed. "Speak of the devils. It's a text from Sam."

"What does it say?"

"That..." I scaled over the words, trying to seem convincing. "Bobby said there's some kind of weird omens at a building in Nebraska. They're already there." I stuffed my phone in my pocket. "Those idiots, going and busting into a place full of demons without us. You think you could zap us there?"

"Of course." He moved closer and I showed him the address on my phone that I pulled free again.

He lied his hand on my shoulder and zapped us to the location, which looked like an old metal roofed barn. Sam and Dean were waiting outside as we approached.

"Ok, here's the thing." Dean said, giving me a look which read good job. "There's somethin in here, we're not sure what, but there were signs all over the place leading to this area. We think it might have something to do with Crowley."

The confusion on Cas' face told me that I hadn't been incorrect. He knew instantly there was nothing about this place that had something to do with Crowley, but of course wasn't going to say anything and give himself away.

"Let's go." Dean led the way to the barn, pulling out his knife.

He and Sam pulled the doors open and we stepped inside.

The place was completely empty and remarkably spotless for an old barn. The floors were solid concrete and I noticed Dean give me a look, which over the time we'd spent together told me to follow his footsteps exactly. Once we hit the center of the barn the boys and I were more to the left while Cas was in the middle.

"I don't understand, Dean." Cas said. "I sense nothing here, what does this have to do with Crowley?"

With a quick flick Sam lit up a matchbook and tossed it to the center and a large ring of fire quickly trapped Cas in the middle.

"You tell us." Dean replied.

I didn't have to act surprised to suddenly see the ring of fire, I honestly hadn't expected that. Cas turned a small circle, eying the flames with a completely blank face.

"What is this?" He asked.

"We're gonna have a little chat." Dean said, crossing his arms. "About your deal with Crowley."

Cas couldn't peel his eyes off the fire. "What are you talking about? I called that deal off, Dean- You saw me."

"Yeah, and a little birdie told me that it's back on. You wanna try explaining yourself?"

Cas scrunched his brows looking up and directly at me. "Who could have told you that?"

"Does it matter?" Sam asked. "Why did you lie to us, Cas?"

"I didn't-" His jaw clenched. "I really had called the deal off- Dean witnessed it. But..."

I had stopped breathing after that "but", because he was letting me know now without a shadow of a doubt that he was guilty. After rubbing my temples I turned away and started to pace.

"I can explain." He continued, starting to panic. "It isn't what you think. I had no other choice. Raphael threatened you. _All _of you. He learned that Lara was alive, and he's using all of you against me to join his side. If I don't do something then he _will _win."

"So let him win!" Dean shouted.

"And let him bring on the apocalypse?" Cas shook his head. "I can't do that."

"This isn't about the apocalypse, Cas-" I said. "This is about you. Your vendetta, your revenge. Yet again you could have easily come to us for help but you didn't. You went off on your own and sided with Crowley. _Again_."

"You don't understand, Lara. It's not as simple as that. I couldn't come to you because there would be no way for you to help. Raphael is powerful. More powerful than all of us. Believe me I know it's not exactly admirable to be working with Crowley. But I don't have a choice."

Dean shook his head. "You did have a choice, and you made the wrong one."

"Just... Let me out-" He said, moving as close to the flames as he could. "We can discuss this, it doesn't have to be like this."

"Yeah, it does." Dean sighed. "How could we ever trust you again, man? You've lied to us, you've been spying on us and who knows what else."

Cas immediately looked to me after that, knowing now that I had to have been the one that told his secret. The hurt and betrayal in his eyes nearly killed me.

"Let's get outa here." Dean nudged Sam and I, he took a few steps away from the circle before pausing and saying. "This is it, Cas. It's over. Don't come back."

He and Sam started for the door and I hesitated, somehow unable to move my feet. I knew Cas was in the wrong, he was doing something dangerous and stupid, but still... The thought of just leaving him there...

"Lara." Dean snapped. "Let's go, _now_."

I hated this. I hated having to choose between my brothers and Cas. If I could have exploded right at that second I think I would have been relieved. But, my decision was made for me when the building started to violently shake and in the distance out the window we could see a cloud of black smoking shooting right for us.

"Go!" Cas suddenly shouted. "Run, leave quickly!"

Dean tugged me by the hand towards the door and we both paused and took another glance at Cas before fleeing.

* * *

We had angel warding sigils painted all over Bobbys house, on every single window including the upstairs. In the days that we had been back no one had mentioned Cas at all- But I knew that I wasn't the only one that couldn't get the situation out of their mind. We failed, in the biggest and worst way possible. Dean spent the majority of the time drinking and reading over old books and researching, Sam did the same minus the drinking part. We were trying to find out how or even if a Phoenix even existed anymore. We were going after Eve by ourselves, and we knew we would get one shot and one shot only. We had to make it count.

But it was proving to be just as impossible as everything always seemed. There was nothing documented what so ever on a friggin Phoenix, or even that they even existed now a days, or ever! Sure there was "lore" but you can't go much on that. One person claimed that you could lure one to your house by leaving a dead horse carcass lying in your yard, others claimed they liked honey. So, yeah. We had no idea how to find one, or even what they looked like. Yeah, a Phoenix is a flaming bird, but there hadn't exactly been any sightings of birds on fire lately. So, that led us to believe it must have been able to take the form of something else, or at least tame down the flames a tad. Who knows, it might not have even been a bird at all?

Basically I was tired of researching, tired of listening to the silence and just plain tired of everything.

I went to bed early that night for a change, deciding against getting drunk for what felt like a billionth time in a row. So, after giving my liver a break I laid down in the darkness and stared at the cracked ceiling in Bobbys spare bedroom.

There was one serious issue with all of this, despite the extremely obvious. Eve was expecting us to set free all of her children- Which meant that obviously since we were trying to gank the bitch we couldn't do that. Castiel however, would- And he could accomplish more on his own than myself and brothers combined, so that meant he very well could have finished that task- Therefore gaining the details he needed to get into Purgatory. If that hadn't happened yet, it meant we needed to be quick about killing her before he could actually do it. Yet again, a horrible situation was placed in front of my brothers and me.

Sleep was impossible, and I ended up tossing and turning for hours before the silence from downstairs told me that Dean and Sam as well had went to bed. I wasn't sure what time it was, and hadn't budged an inch for over an hour when I heard the flutter of wings.

My eyes closed and I clenched the covers in my fists tightly... Dammit...

I sat up, not surprised in the slightest to see Castiel standing in front of my bed.

"How did you get in here?" I asked.

He glanced at the artwork drawn on my window.

"There were a few inaccuracies with Deans sigils." He answered.

"Why are you here? If Sam or Dean see you..."

"They won't." He interrupted. "I don't plan on staying long."

I kicked the covers off and swung my legs over the edge of the bed. "Ok, so. Why are you here?"

"I just wanted to apologize. And to say that I regret what's happened."

"So... You're really going through with this?" I shook my head. "I guess I was stupid to think that you would actually realize how incredibly idiotic this plan is."

"You'll realize once it's over that I was right."

"No, I won't." I stood now. "Because once you do this, you won't be you anymore. You will have completely changed and as hard as it is to say, I don't think I want to know what you're going to become. I'd rather just remember you the way you are right now." I took a few steps towards him. "I just wanna know one thing before you go. Is it worth it?"

He squinted at me. "What do you mean?"

"I told you there would be consequences to you doing this, remember?" He nodded. "Well, this is the consequences. So I want to know, is it worth losing your family, Cas? We're family, it's more than just you being my friend, or Sam and Deans. It's much more than that, and now- After this. It'll be over. So, is it worth it?"

He didn't look to want to answer that, and I knew that I wasn't going to talk him out of this- I was just letting him know once again what would happen after this was over. Who knows, maybe he figured that we would actually forgive him, that he could come back and things could be like old times.

"As long as I know you're safe, that Dean and Sam are safe, then it _is _worth it, Lara." He finally said.

"Ok-" I shrugged, because really what else could I say to that? "Then I guess this is it." Now I gave him one last hug, because I knew I wouldn't be seeing him again, at least not in this way.

I was almost positive that being stabbed in the gut was less painful than this moment. And I would know, seeing is that's how I had died. Because the physical pain would eventually fade away, but when it came to something like this? It very well might linger with you forever- And, for someone like me, who had five years at best until the spell dissolved and I would be immortal... I was destined to an eternity of agony. When I pulled away I gave him a kiss on the cheek which caused him to freeze.

"I'm going down for a drink. I'm sure you'll be gone when I come back up, so-" I headed for the door. "Goodbye, Cas."

I closed the door behind me and heard him zap away, then afterwards fell back against the wall in the hallway with my head in my hands.


	50. Chapter 50

Dean was reading through, get this, Samuel Colts old journal. Yeah, Sammy Colt- How friggin awesome is that? But, it had been I don't know how many days since Cas last paid me a visit, and since then, and after informing Dean that his angel proofing wasn't accurate, we went through the process yet again. Since then Cas hadn't come back, so either we got it right the second time around- Or he had taken my goodbye as an actual goodbye and wasn't going to bother returning. Still, I tried to keep my mind off it it by focusing on our newest job, which was finding a Phoenix.

It was after an hour or so of reading through Colts journal that Dean suddenly sat up and said.

"Got it!" He said slamming the book down.

"Got what?" Sam asked, smirking.

Dean started reading aloud. "Gun killed a Phoenix today, left behind a smoldering pile of black ashes." He pointed to the page. "Sunrise Wyoming, March 5th 1861."

"Oh, yeah!" I said sarcastically. "Let me just strap on my time travel boots and jet on back there then!"

He scowled at me. "Buzz kill. Look, this is all we got- So I think we should call Lee down here and have him wave his wand and, well... Yeah."

I grumbled, but not for reasons Dean might have thought. It was because now we had to rely on Lee for shit like this when in the past it was Cas who would always lend us a helping hand.

"What makes you think that he would even do it?" I replied.

"Well-" Sam shrugged. "He did kinda help us out a few times already, and... He was the one that told us about the ashes in the first place."

Dean jumped up from his chair. "I gotta grab a few things before we make the trip."

"That's assuming he'll even help us at all!" I shouted after him but he was already out the door.

Sam only rolled his eyes before closing the book he held. "So, you gonna call him?"

"I don't know- Should I?"

"Uh, well- Seeing is that this is the only solid lead we have..."

"Why do I always have to do it? Seriously, oh Lara call Lee down here, Call Cas, call this or that, do this or that. You do it, I'm sick of it." I sat back and frowned.

He leaned forward with his elbows on his knees. "Look, kiddo. I know you're takin all of this hard. You're not the only one. And, to quote Dean, stow your crap for right now because we have a job to do. After this is over, then you can have your melt down, ok?"

Bobby glanced at me from the doorway, shrugging. Yeah, he agreed. And how easy it would be to "stow" my crap and just completely block it out. Of course it was better than throwing a tantrum and going on drinking binges every ten seconds.

"Ok, fine-" I huffed, staring up at the ceiling. "I hate doing this. I hate it, just so you know." Sam only shrugged with that same puppy eyed expression. "Lee. Look, you know just as well as I do that I hate asking you for help, and I'm sure you're getting pretty damn sick of it too. But we kinda need you down here. Let's just say Cas' has gone awol for the moment and can't give us a hand. Which means..."

"I'm the sloppy second choice?" Lee said in the doorway, making Bobby nearly jump out of his pants.

"Basically." I sneered at him.

He strode into the room with a sort of stoicism that you couldn't help but scowl at. I swear, the guy was so cocky there wouldn't be anything that could knock him down a few pegs.

"Well, since I'm here. What is it you want?" He asked.

"Uh-" Sam stood, putting his hands in his pockets. "We kinda need to time travel back to 1861."

Lee arched a brow. "Time travel? What makes you think I could do that?"

"Duh, you told me, numb-nuts." I said. "Remember, up in the box? You had to go back to the thirteenth century to grab some extinct herb or whatever."

"Ah- That-" He shrugged. "Well, yes I do that have ability but it's not so easy to send others back in time. Especially that far back."

"So you can't do it?" Sam shrugged.

"Well, I could. But you would have a time limit of course. I can't just ship you back there and you take your dear old sweet time in getting whatever the hell you're doing, done. The farther back I send you, the more difficult it will be to get you back. So, you would have approximately 24 hours to do what you're set on doing... That's it."

Sam and I exchanged glances. "Guess that's better than nothing."

"You know-" Lee pointed at Sam. "You're much more agreeable than your older brother. I don't have nearly the same desire to tare your eyes out or their sockets as I do him."

"Uh... Thanks." Sam sat again.

"Maybe Dean wouldn't hate you so much if you weren't such a penis wrinkle." I said, and Lee glared at me. "Just saying."

He ignored my jab. "So, when do you want to set off?"

"Whenever Dean gets back." I answered.

"And where exactly will I be sending you?"

"Sunrise Wyoming. A Phoenix is killed there on March 5th." Sam said now.

"Oh, so this is what this is about." Lee sat on the sofa, crossing one leg over the other. "I suppose that is the best plan, since they're extinct now."

Yet again Sam and I exchanged glances. Yeah, nice- He tells us we need Phoenix ashes but doesn't bother to explain that they were all extinct? Ugh, really- This guy, it was all I could do to not stab him in the throat.

Dean was gone for about an hour before he came back carrying three large brown bags and a big stupid grin on his face.

"What's that?" Sam asked.

"Well, since we're goin back to 1861, I figured- We needed to look the part." He lied the bags down and started pulling out what I thought were costumes.

"You can't be serious?" I said, my eyes fixed on two incredibly ridiculous dresses. "You don't expect me to wear that?"

He held one up, and it was dark red with lace, a tight bust line and off the shoulder sleeves.

"What's wrong with it?" He asked.

"I'm not a frickin bar wench, Dean. I'm not gonna run around in a sexist town dressed like a hooker!"

"What ya talking about sexist?" Dean scowled.

"Uh, Dean-" Sam chuckled. "There wasn't exactly much as far as womens rights goes back then, and you want to parade our sister around like a prostitute?"

Dean frowned and held up the second dress, which was jet black and came with a veil. "Then she can be a widow in mourning."

I groaned. "No. Why can't I just go wearing what I have on now?"

"Cause chicks didn't run around in skinny jeans back then, genius- You'd get more attention like that then you would in one of the dresses."

I looked to Sam for back up and he sighed. "He's kinda right."

Dean grinned. "So pick one."

"You know I'm not gonna be able to fight in that thing-" I said after grabbing the red one. "What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"You're resourceful-" Sam shrugged. "Figure it out."

"I hate you both." I said before stomping to the bathroom and changing.

* * *

For the record, right at that moment, I very much so hated my brothers. Dean especially. This dress was laughably ridiculous. The type of get-up some chick might wear on Halloween if she decided to go dressed as a saloon girl. How I was to "blend in" with the town was going to be impossible in this get-up, but still, I left the bathroom and returned to Bobbys den, scowling bitterly and making sure Sammy noticed I didn't appreciate his quiet snickering.

"Nice dress." He said. "Ma'am." With a tilt of his cowboy hat.

"Shut the hell up or I swear you'll be a chick with one quick slice." I retorted.

Sam obviously wasn't going to cooperate with playing dress up and had only put on a shirt Dean had bought him but kept his usual jacket and jeans. Although I guess the cowboy boots weren't exactly a regular item of his ensemble.

I flopped down on the sofa, scratching at the areas of lace that touched my skin when Dean stepped in.

Instantly both Sam and I snorted out a laugh. Thank god, he looked even more idiotic than I did.

"Uh-" Sam said, trying to hide his laughing by looking at the floor. "What are you supposed to be?"

Dean stared down at his striped sarape. "What, what's wrong with it?"

"Oh, nothing-" Bobby said, somehow able to keep a straight face. "But ya do realize that people didn't dress like that? You can't go by old westerns you watched on late night tv."

"There's no trying to convince him." Sam said. "He's idolized Clint Eastwood since he was a kid. Just let him play out his fantasy."

"I think it's time to set off now." Lee said. He had been standing in the doorway shaking his head for the better part of five minutes. "I'll send you to March 4th, that way you should have plenty of time to get the job done."

Dean grabbed a bag that Bobby had stuffed full of gold chains and other jewelry, along with our weapons.

I wrapped a black fringed shawl around my shoulders, sulking my way to stand beside Sam and Dean as Lee zapped us away from Bobbys.

Once I got my bearings I glanced around the area, cringing instantly at seeing muddy streets as the stench of horse manure ran rampant.

"Wow-" Sam said, taking a step forward only to hear a disgusting squish under his boot. "Oh, for the love of..." He immediately started hopping around on one foot trying to shake the crap off his boot.

"That's what's so awesome about this, Sammy-" Dean said, patting him on the shoulder sarcastically. "It's authentic."

He led the way and I hopped over smelly little piles while holding the skirt of my dress above my knees.

This so called town was tiny, microscopic pretty much with probably a grand total of fifteen buildings. There was a small crowd lingering near an area just adjacent to the towns entrance, which we started for. We made sure to stay behind the crowd, and I instantly pinched my nose closed at the stench of the man in front of me. I swear to god, didn't people hear of a bar of soap in this era?!

The excitement going on was clearly a hanging as before us a good twenty feet away stood gallows. A man read from the bible, spouting whatever scripture they thought would be comforting for the poor douche bag about to be executed, while the man with the noose around his neck looked more pissed off than afraid. He made some sort of threat, which was hard to hear over the crowd shouting- Before a man with a badge pulled the lever and the trapdoor opened. The man fell through with a disgusting snap and crack of his neck.

"Jeez-" Dean cringed. "Maybe a little _too _authentic."

"Yeah, seriously." Sam shook his head.

"Ok, well-" Dean watched the Sheriff descend the gallows stairs and mosey his way on past and to a building in the distance. "Guess we talk to the Sheriff first, huh?"

Before we left the scene, I inched my way closer to Sam because of the way a bearded man with no teeth was gawking at me.

"Do you ever sit and suddenly realize that this is _actually_ our lives?" I asked.

"Not now, Lara." Dean started down the street and I quickly followed.

We entered the apparent jail house and the Sheriff was sitting at a table with two other men drinking some type of alcohol from a brown bottle.

"Mornin." Dean said with a tip of his hat and I rolled my eyes. "I'm..." He paused, then smirked. "Marshal Eastwood, Clint Eastwood-" He showed his badge pinned under his blanket, then pointed to Sam. "That's Walker, he's a Texas ranger." The men merely nodded, I suppose in greeting. "And-" Now he looked at me, momentarily stumped. "This is..." He grumbled something about knowing nothing about chicks from westerns before his eyes lit up. "Ah, this is Scarlett O'Hara."

"Tomorrow _is _another day, but frankly my dear I don't give a damn." I smiled, and Dean glared at me with dagger eyes.

"_Uhuh_-" The sheriff replied to that, sitting back with his feet resting on the table. "What can we do for ya, Marshal?"

Dean stepped forward. "We're lookin for a man. Goes by the name Samuel Colt."

"The gun maker?" A man in black asked.

"Yeah, that's right." Sam nodded. "Have you seen him around anywhere?"

"Nope." They went silent after that, and we stood awkwardly for nearly thirty seconds. "Should try Elkins down at the saloon. Man's been here longer than god."

They were clearly disinterested in us by that point so we left after saying nothing further and made our way to saloon.

"Ya know. Call me crazy." I said. "But I think I regret coming back here with you guys."

"Me too-" Dean said, still pissed at me. "You trying to blow our cover or something?"

"Dean... Gone with the wind hasn't even been written yet, so I think we're cool."

"Still, from here on out, _you're _not allowed to talk." He pointed his finger in my face before pushing past the swinging doors on the saloon.

The devastation on his face after we stepped inside was like watching a kid finding out his favorite superhero wasn't real. I don't know what he expected, honestly. Did he really think that it was going to be like the movies? People dancing around while some dude with a large twisty mustache played the piano- Card games at nearly every table and beautiful, yet scantily dressed bar maids sauntering their way to customers?

"This is not awesome." He said, frowning.

"Sorry your dream is crushed, bud." I said.

"You're not allowed to talk." He reminded, moving towards the bar.

This place smelled like a gas station toilet bowl, maybe even a little worse- And I instinctively kept my hands wrapped in my shawl to keep from catching anything.

When we stopped at the bar the old man behind it turned and glared at us.

"What can I get ya?" He asked.

"You Elkins?" Sam asked, instead of ordering.

"Yep." Was his ingenious reply. "You want somethin?"

"I'll have a whiskey." Dean answered. "My friend will have sarsaparilla." Sam rolled his eyes at him.

"We're looking for Samuel Colt-" Sam went on. "The Sheriff said you might have heard of him."

"Yeah-" The old man poured two shots from two separate bottles before looking at me. "You don't want nothin?"

"No thanks-" I shuddered. "I'm not putting my mouth on anything in this place."

Dean grumbled yet again, making damn sure I saw the "I hope you die" stares he was giving me. "So, can you tell us where Samuel Colt might be?"

"He passed through here a few years back, ain't seen him since though."

"Well do you happen to know where he might be?" Sam shook his head.

The old man thought for a moment as Dean took a sip of his whiskey, immediately choking and spitting it out all over the bar.

"Oh my god." He whispered quietly. "I think I'm dying."

Sam only smirked as he sipped his girly drink, giving a sarcastic "Ahhh" and smacking his lips afterwards.

"So I heard he's buildin some railway up about half a days ride from here." Elkins answered finally.

Dean smacked Sam on the chest. "The devils trap." He said quietly.

I was letting my attention drift around the dirty building as Elkins moved over and eyed me up and down.

"You lookin for work, darlin? My best girl Darla is getting up there." He twitched his brows at me.

"Oh god..." I looked at Dean and Sam who were both sitting back and watching the scene with a grin. "No thanks... I, uh... Took a vow of celibacy."

He clearly didn't know what that meant, but still took it as a no- And went back to wiping down the bar when the man in black from the jail came inside and headed upstairs. We moved from the bar now and to a table where I quickly sat and tried to ignore the way the few drunks were drooling at me.

"Ok, so what now?" Sam shrugged. "We head out to where Colt's supposed to be?"

"I don't think it would be a good idea for all of us to go-" Dean replied. "Just in case."

"I nominate myself to go." I said, raising my hand. "Anything to get outa this smelly ass town full of pervs."

Dean was about to object when a shrill womans scream erupted from upstairs. We immediately jumped up and ran towards the stairs and I successfully tripped over my skirt and fell face first on the ground. Sam scooped me up and practically carried me where the woman was still shrieking.

When Dean burst through the door the woman clad only in her skivvies was pressed against the wall sobbing and pointing to the bed where a pile of smoldering ashes in the form of a body laid.

It didn't take long for the Sheriff to come running up and as we lingered in the background the woman explained what happened. She was insistent the ghost of Elias Finch, the man who was just hanged earlier that morning barely an hour ago, had walked into the room and torched the judge. Of course the Sheriff denied that, saying it couldn't have been a ghost and the noose must not have snapped his neck like they thought. Meanwhile my brothers and I exchanged knowing glances.

"Trip to the cemetery after dark." Dean muttered before the Sheriff motioned him over.

"Finch clearly ain't dead. Which means we gotta find him." He said.

"Alright, yeah, so what do we have to do?" Dean asked, shrugging.

"In the mornin, we'll form a posse- You and Walker should join in. Miss O'hara should stay behind for her own safety." He tipped his hat at me.

"Pig." I murmured quietly, then waved sweetly.

It's not as though these oafs knew I could shoot just as well, if not better than all of them combined.

Dean made the plans as the Sheriff pretty much ordered that before they leave on their so called posse raid that Sam and Dean both acquire more fitting gear for the ride. So now what we needed to do was stall around until nightfall so we could go grave digging.

* * *

We stared down at the hole in the ground and a busted and splintered casket left behind. The gravestone with the name "Elias Finch" was crudely carved into it.

"Hm. Ok, so. Maybe this Phoenix isn't actually in the form of a bird?" Sam said. "Maybe he's walkin around masquerading as a man."

"What we know so far, according to what the Sheriff said-" Dean went on. "Is that before they pulled the lever the dude threatened to come back for the judge, him and the deputy."

"So shouldn't this guy be on lock down so we know he's not gonna get deep fried?" I asked.

"Yeah, somethin tells me that's not gonna be easy-" Dean sighed. "Ok, Sam- You gotta get to Colt somehow before morning. We're running out of time."

"Any suggestion on how I'm supposed to get that far in a few hours?"

Both Dean and I looked back towards the livery where horses were corralled, and within the next twenty minutes Sam was attempting to climb up in the saddle while Dean and I tried to keep the horse still.

We watched him take off, wobbly leaning sideways trying to balance himself.

"I feel sorry for that horse." I said, and Dean readily agreed.

Within the next couple of hours the Sheriff was baked extra crispy by the Phoenix, and Dean was promptly anointed as the new law man in town- Which meant there was one last man on Elias Finchs list that was going to be burned to a cinder. The Deputy.

I waited in the jail while Dean went to "persuade" the dude into helping us out by being a nice tempting piece of bait. And during my time alone in the jail I discarded the stupid dress, because I had cleverly worn my jeans and t-shirt underneath it. I was getting tired of flouncing around in the thing and besides, it was near show time- Which meant I needed to be able to run, punch or kick whoever might have gotten in my way. When Dean finally pushed the door, _and_ the unwilling Deputy to the jail cell, I watched from the corner I stood in with a smirk.

Dean locked the door and hid the keys in his pocket, as he turned to face me.

"Dude..." He said, eying me up and down. "Where's your dress?"

I pointed to the shredded heap of fabric on the floor. "There."

"You can't walk around in that, Lara- Remember... _Blend_."

"What's wrong with my clothes? They're not that bad."

He stared down at my _Queen _t-shirt, then glared at me. "Really?"

I only shrugged and he pulled off his serape. "At least wear that, comon. Work with me here."

Since I didn't want to start a fight I threw it over my head and he grabbed the Sheriffs long black coat that was hanging on the wall. Just his luck, it fit perfectly and looked much better than the clown suit I was wearing now.

We could do nothing but pace around and wait- While the Deputy begged for us to let him out. We ignored him of course, because he was the last in line to be toasted by the Phoenix- And with the bars separating him from danger we assumed he would be relatively safe in there.

I was getting tired of being in this time, I wanted to go back to Bobbys and take a boiling hot bath to wash the germs and stink off of me. If I never had to time travel again I would be deliriously happy.

Dean glanced at the clock on the wall and I followed his eyes. We had twenty minutes before Lee was going to zap us back- And Sam was taking forever getting Colt back here. Even though neither of us said anything, I knew Dean and I were thinking the same thing. We were both hoping we hadn't made this miserable trip for nothing. When the door to the jail was suddenly kicked open and the very man we had seen hanged stepped in, Dean moved into position.

"Open up that jail cell." The man said, removing his leather gloves.

"Go ahead and open it yourself." Dean replied. "Unless you can't."

I then threw a nail that had been lying on the desk at him, and after he caught it his palm immediately began to sizzle and he dropped it like a hot potato.

"Yeah, that's what I thought-" Dean shrugged. "Iron... Has the same affect on you like most monsters out there. It explains why you just stood there cuffed on those gallows, or, why you can't open the cell doors."

"You're hunters." The man stated. "It doesn't matter, you can't kill me. So are you really going to stand there and protect that piece of filth behind those bars?"

"Nothing personal-" Dean answered. "But, we know what you are, so..."

"And do you know what _he _is?" Elias stepped closer until he was in front of the bars. "He's a murderer. He killed my wife, shot me, and I got the blame for it. So I'll ask again, are you really gonna protect this piece of filth?"

"Honestly, I could care less about the guy, if what you're saying is true then he's an asshole." The man inside the cage shouted his protest. "But, it doesn't matter. I know what you are, and you have to die."

Within seconds the dude had pulled his gun, shot the deputy and starting firing at Dean and I. Dean jumped out the window while I darted out the smashed in door and we both took off running down a side alley. He chased after us, shooting as bullets ricocheted off the walls and ground.

Dean grabbed my wrist and yanked me beside a building as we tried to catch our breath. We moved on again across to another wall and for the moment had lost the asshole.

"Dean, Lara." Sam whispered, motioning to us from a halfway open doorway.

"Ugh finally." I muttered and we darted to him. "Where's Colt?"

"Yeah, he's not coming, but he sent this." He reached into his jacket and pulled out the special monster slaying gun.

Deans eyes practically lit up like stars after he saw it, and he quickly grabbed it. "Ok, let's finish this already." He pulled a glass bottle out of his pocket and handed it to me. "Be ready, we're almost out of time."

I nodded and Sam and I followed, ducking for cover in the alley as Dean stomped out into the street and starting shouting for Finch to come face him head on. When he finally appeared on the opposite end of the street, Sam pushed me down farther to hide behind a horse trough.

We watched the scene that was fitting of an old western movie. Dangerous show down, two gunslingers with itchy trigger fingers just standing there stiff waiting for one or the other to draw first. I halfway expected to see a tumbleweed bounce through the middle of them. It felt like hours that they stood there when suddenly like a flash they both drew and fired. Dean stood firm, unharmed the bullet had missed him- But Finch however, immediately started screaming as he was suddenly engulfed in flames and collapsed into a pile of ashes.

"Go, Lara, go!" Sam shouted, pushing me out from behind the trough.

I darted for the pile and started to violently scoop it up and pour the handfuls into the bottle until I couldn't stuff anymore inside of it, when suddenly I felt a whoosh and I was no longer kneeling in the muddy street but back inside Bobbys den.

After rising to my feet, I turned back towards Sam and Dean, waving the bottle in the air with a grin.

"Got it." I said, then looked at the soot on my hands. "And now I need to bathe."

Bobby looked relieved to see us all in one piece, and Lee was just as stiff and cocky as usual.

"Thank god." Dean moved closer and grabbed the bottle from my hands, careful as to not spill any ashes.

"How'd it go?" Bobby asked.

"Super-" I said, cringing. "If you get past how incredibly dirty and awful it was back then."

"But we got what we went for." Sam moved closer and we seemed to stare down at the bottle in awe.

"Yeah, now- We take the fight to her. It's time to end this, and to stop the bitch from giving Cas the entrance to Purgatory."

I honestly felt like jumping up and down and cheering. Even though I knew Cas would be pissed at us for ruining his chances, at least we could all take comfort in the fact that _we _saved _him _for once.


	51. Chapter 51

"Hurry!" Dean shrieked as he and Bobby struggled to carry Sam through the trees. "Sammy, just hold on!"

I was firing my pistol left and right as unknown creatures chased after us. Sam wouldn't stop seizing, and his heart rate was erratic and no matter what we did he just wouldn't wake up.

How had it all come down to this? How could things have gone so drastically wrong? Just that morning, everything was fine... As fine as they could have been. And now... Sammy could be dying.

Dean and Bobby had no choice but to lay Sam down on the ground, he was seizing and convulsing to the point they couldn't carry him any longer. The fog enveloped us, and the snapping of twigs in all areas of the forest told us we were now being surrounded. I stared down at the gun in my hands, I had one shot left- Bobby and Deans barrels were empty...

We were screwed...

* * *

_Five hours earlier._

* * *

I descended the stairs into Bobbys basement where Dean had been since morning preparing shot gun rounds filled with Phoenix ash. He didn't know I was coming, he was blankly staring at the ashes left in the bottle, shaking them every now and then as a grand total of five rounds sat in front of him.

It had been four months since we took down the Phoenix, four months that we had been trying to find a way to track down Eve. Oh how much simpler things would have been had we a map that would pinpoint where the bitch was, but of course we were never that lucky now were we? No, we ended up having to hunt down monster after monster, interrogating them until the point finally one of them cracked. What was left of the vampire was still sitting in the basement, with her head lying four feet across from her body. She had finally told us where Eve was hiding. Apparently an old mansion that had been turned into a tuberculosis sanitarium back in the early 1900s was her home of choice when she wasn't going on killing rampages. Sam had google searched this building, it was rumored as being notoriously haunted to the point it had been abandoned for the last few decades.

A few paranormal teams had "investigated" the area and posted pictures on their websites- And I could say without a shadow of a doubt the place was definitely creepy. It was enormous, and even held an attached atrium, a green house in the backyard and supposed hot springs where the patients back in the day would come for treatments. But, what was left of this place now was covered in plant life, the forest surrounding had all but completely smothered it from the rest of the world. So, I suppose it was the perfect place for the Mother of All to hide.

So, we were heading out that evening. Luckily, it was only a couple hours away from Bobbys. Who knows, maybe Eve did that on purpose? She wanted to stay close just in case she wanted to come and slaughter us.

Still Dean didn't know I was watching him as he rose the bottle to his nose and took a slight whiff, then cringed.

"Smell tasty?" I asked, startling him.

"Oh yeah, yummy." He replied sarcastically.

I stepped down the rest of the stairs and pulled up a stool beside him. "So, why are you just staring at what's left in the bottle? Aren't you gonna put it in another shell?"

"I was thinkin..." He paused, setting the bottle down. "What if we miss the shot? Five rounds is pretty sparse there, kid- What if we miss? Or, if worse comes to worse, what if we're taken in or lose our weapons. I'm trying to consider every bad scenario that could happen to us."

"Yeah, I tend to do that too. What are you thinking?"

He shrugged, tapping the end of the bottle on the work bench. "It doesn't hurt us if we touch it. You proved that when you scooped the crap up with your bare hands."

"Ok? What's your point?"

He now grabbed a bottle of whiskey and twisted it open. "You're all for kamikaze missions, you've proved that a million times since Cas cracked up. Hell, you're even more reckless than me now, and that's sayin a lot."

"What's your point?" I repeated, getting annoyed. Yes, in the months that Cas had been gone I really hadn't given a rats ass about much, including myself.

"Like I said. We gotta take everything into consideration. Say we miss our shots, or, Eve takes us in and our weapons are gone... What would we have left, huh?"

His eyes seared into my own, until I realized what he was talking about. It explained why he hadn't put the remaining ashes in a round, and why he mentioned it didn't harm us when we touched it.

I suddenly sat up straight. "So, you want _us _to become the weapons?"

"She goes all chow town on us-" He shrugged. "Takes a bite out of you, me or Sammy, it's heartburn for her that no antacid can fix."

Nodding, I took the bottle of ashes from him and inspected it. "Interesting theory. I wonder if it would actually work?"

"Only one way of knowing." He held up his empty shot glass and I could see the traces of ashes stuck to the bottom.

"You've already drank some?"

"Someone had to test it out, make sure it wasn't gonna poison us. Gotta say, it tasted like crap." He smirked at me.

"Any after affects at all?"

He shook his head. "Not really. Burned a little going down, but that coulda been from the whiskey for all I know."

I hardly doubted that whiskey would burn Deans throat anymore, not after how much of it he consumed almost daily.

"Other than that? Nothing else?"

"Nope. Feel the same as always. Which is makin me wonder, if it doesn't even leave a mark on us, how is it gonna burn the crap outa her?"

"So we could get ourselves eaten for nothing possibly." I poured a shot of whiskey along with some of the ashes, then held it in the air. "Cheers."

Dean watched me down the shot with a blank expression. He was right, it tasted like warmed over crap that had been crapped on twice, and it burned like fire going down. But, other than that- I felt nothing out of the ordinary.

"Now we just get Sam to agree to this." I said, sitting the glass aside.

And, overall it didn't take much convincing for Sam to agree to it. We all knew what was at stake here. If it meant us dying to insure _Eve _dying, well... We were willing to do it. The only issue was that Bobby was pissed at us for not including him. Since we were all in this together, he as well planned on juicing himself up with Phoenix ash. Yeah this was a crazy idea, especially since we weren't even sure it was going to work. But, we went a long way for those ashes, and seeing is that the info came from Lee- We could only assume that he knew what he was talking about.

When we started on the drive I yet again allowed myself to go off in that daze I had been gifted with lately. The one that prevented me from giving a crap if something happened to me. The only thing I was concerned with was making sure that my brothers and Bobby wouldn't have to take the plunge.

The two hour drive wasn't near long enough, and when we pulled up to an area of forest down a dead end gravel road, Dean parked and we immediately piled out.

"We go through here." He stated, pointing to the trees which were barely starting to bloom with upcoming spring. "Chances are she'll know we're coming."

No one had a response to that as we started through the treeline and descended into the forest to the point we could no longer see the impala.

I obviously was accustomed to creepy atmospheres but there was something about this area that was eerie enough to make even me shudder. It was foggy, it was damp and chilly- And the gray sky above with the wind blowing through the near naked trees made me on edge. Plus there was obviously the uncertainty of whether or not Eve knew we were coming and we were heading straight into an ambush.

We stuck pretty close together with our weapons at the ready. I was behind Dean while Bobby and Sam pulled up the rear. When we heard a snapping of twigs behind us we immediately swung around.

I know I wasn't the one only shocked to see Castiel standing there, but I of course was the only one whose jaw dropped.

"Cas?" Dean stepped forward, not lowering his gun. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Cas paid no mind to the pistol in Deans hand as his eyes scattered across each of us.

"I'm here to help." He said. "I know what you're intending to do, and naturally I'm not going to stand aside while you run off and get yourselves slaughtered."

Of course we were suspicious. For four god damned months we hadn't seen a hair off his head and now suddenly on the very day we go to kill Eve he appears?

"Help, huh?" Dean asked, sharing his skepticism. "Yeah, well. We didn't ask for help."

"Regardless of that-" He paused and looked at me. "I'm here."

"What exactly do you plan to do?" Sam asked now. "Since Eve has the ability to take your powers away."

"One more body is better than nothing isn't it?" Cas replied, his eyebrows scrunched.

Yeah, there was definitely something off about him. Even more so than before. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but just the way he spoke even sounded different. It was somehow more cold and emotionless than usual. And the look in his eyes? Well, let's just say that in the past you could see the kindness there, now they just seemed angry.

"I guess we can't really stop you." Dean finally replied, because really- We were stuck. "If you wanna follow, then follow."

"Can I ask how you plan to take down Eve?"

Dean was scowling, but he motioned towards our duffel bags. "Phoenix ash is supposed to do the trick."

I knew what Dean was thinking before he even spoke. He figured that if Cas was here to somehow sabotage us then if he ended up taking our weapons at least we still had our back up plan to fall onto. But, Cas only nodded, albeit slightly surprised that we had actually found a Phoenix now a days. That told me that he must have known for quite some time what was required to kill her.

"Lead the way then." He said.

Dean turned but not before passing me a glance. It seemed he and I were getting better and better at communicating without actually uttering a single word- And what he told me just then was to linger back and be the eyes that watched the angel. The reason for that was... I really didn't know. He should have known that I wasn't exactly the strongest person in the group when it came to distrusting Cas. Yeah, I was still stupid and thought he might snap out of this.

We moved further into the trees in the direction where the mansion was supposed to be- Dean and Sam led the way with Bobby in the middle and of course myself lagging behind with Cas a few feet behind me. He didn't seem to notice me giving him subtle glances because his attention was focused on practically every inch of forest around us. His angel blade was already in his hand and for a split second it really did seem as though he was there to help. He was clearly on guard, and, if he really was there to sabotage us would he need to be? Chances were he would know what would be around us if that were the case. So either he was good at playing pretend, or- He really didn't have any idea of what we were going to run into. Still, I couldn't help but wonder exactly how he knew we were going to be here at all. That was what made the situation so suspicious. We hadn't spoken to him in months, and we had angel proofed Bobbys house with assistance of Lee, so we knew he couldn't have been spying on us.

But for the moment there was no explaining exactly how he knew we were here.

He finally noticed my glances and quickened his pace to walk beside me.

"How have you been, Lara?" He asked.

"It's kind of a bad time to catch up, Cas." I replied. "We're kinda in the middle of something." The bitch was coming out in me now. "Besides, if you were really concerned with mine or their welfare you would have popped up a long ass time ago."

"In case you've forgotten, Dean told me _not _to come back."

Dean and Sam both glared at us from over their shoulders but continued on.

"Yeah, well- I suppose it doesn't matter why he even said that at all, huh? It wouldn't matter to you."

He sighed. "I know why he said it."

I skidded to a stop. "Just how did you know how to find us anyways?" I shrugged. "You couldn't have been spying on us, because Lee spray painted the artwork at Bobbys so... How?"

He squinted his eyes as he glared at me, and he obviously didn't want to answer that. By now the boys had noticed we were no longer following and stopped about ten feet ahead.

"The angel proofing does keep me from entering Bobbys home, or overhearing conversations, Lara-" He said. "But, it doesn't prevent me from being able to sense where _you _are."

"Me?"

He nodded. "I suspect it has something to do with being your Guardian."

I snorted out a laugh. "Well, I'm surprised you actually admitted that."

"If you're wondering if I've been following you. I haven't."

I said nothing more and started following the boys again. So basically it didn't matter where I went or what I did, Cas would be able to sense me and pop up any old time he wanted to. I wasn't sure if I was happy about that, or pissed.

When Dean suddenly rose his hand and motioned for us to get down, everyone obeyed. We practically crawled our way through the brush as the outline of a building finally became noticeable.

It was the atrium attached to the mansion, and so far there didn't seem to be any signs of life other than a few squawking birds.

"What now?" Bobby asked.

"We go in, no holding back." Dean answered. "This is our only shot, so- No matter what, we don't stop."

"So no real plan?" Sam sighed. "Just as usual we go in guns blazing."

"Pretty much." Dean smirked.

We left the trees now and started around the giant glass walled room. I had my pistol ready, since we were saving the shotguns for Eve. Dean stopped only long enough to hand out the remaining weapons from the duffel bag before we darted across the large yard and to the first door we could find to get inside.

As soon as we stepped foot inside the place we were of course, ambushed. It was no big surprise and I think that's what Dean was counting on all along- Because we knew that we wouldn't have been able to make it past Eve and her monsters with just a few bullets and the magic knife. He was counting on plan B actually being the main way of taking her down. Which meant, chances were, one of us were going to get bit or even worse. Little did any of them know that I planed for that person to be myself. Sam, Dean and Bobby had done more for me than I had ever hoped for and it was time for me to repay that.

But, since it was the plan to get taken we of course had to make it look convincing. We starting hacking and shooting, Cas started cutting with his angel blade but pretty soon there were too many to hold off- And after a short few minutes all five of us were disarmed and being dragged through this mansions massive halls. Cas' powers were either being blocked, or he simply just wasn't using them- I didn't know- But when we entered a large foyer type area with an open staircase and cracked marble floors, it didn't take long to spot Eve standing in the middle of it.

Nearly a dozen of her so called children were strategically placed around the area standing guard, and once we were dragged inside and roughly shoved to the floors she shook her head.

"Castiel-" She said. "I didn't think this was part of the agreement. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought the deal was- You rescue my children, your friends stop hunting me, and I give you the entrance to Purgatory in the end? Am I wrong?"

Cas said nothing in return.

"Bring me their weapons." She said, and one of her monsters approached and grabbed each of our shot guns. She took a whiff of one and then threw it back to the ground. "Phoenix ash. I'm impressed, that is pretty hard to come by now a days. You must have had work pretty hard for that."

"You have no idea." Dean said.

"Get rid of them." She ordered and the weapons holding the Phoenix ash was quickly discarded. The only thing left was our pistols which were harmless to her, but she of course kicked them across the massive room and out of reach. "So, I guess the deal is off then?"

"That's right." Dean forced himself to his feet. "We've saved enough of your freaky brats to last us a lifetime."

Her dark eyes moved to Cas. "And you? This is really how you repay me? After everything I've done for you?"

Cas' jaw clenched and immediately we looked at him in confusion. What exactly did Eve do for him? Or, had she already given him the way into Purgatory and we just didn't know it?

"I'm here for their protection." He said.

"Oh and clearly you're doing an excellent job of that." She smirked. "You're powerless, they're pretty much just useless lumps without their weapons, so really- How do you expect to stop me from killing all of you?"

This wasn't going so well, not that I figured it would be simple anyways. I pulled myself to my feet next and smirked at her, I needed to piss the bitch off somehow.

"So scary you are." I said. "Big bad Mommy threatening to kill us. I'm shaking in my boots."

She glared at me. "You're really going to antagonize me? Why would you do that?"

"Because your face pisses me off. And I'd hate to think you were getting off on thinking you were intimidating us somehow."

Dean, Sam and Bobby didn't look very pleased at what I was doing. But hey, someone needed to do it right? Cas however, looked completely baffled and slightly terrified.

"No, no no. There's a reason for this." She wagged her finger at me, moving closer. "Either you're extremely stupid, or you have a death wish. Which is it?"

I nodded. "I wanna make a deal with you. It's a fair trade and you should be willing to accept."

"And what's that?"

"Let them go-" I motioned to the four men. "And take me, kill me, eat me, whatever you wanna do."

"How exactly is that a fair trade?"

"You know what I am? Seraphim- Yeah apparently that's a pretty big deal. I have a time limit so to speak on the spell that's blocking my powers. Right now, I'm harmless. But in, a few years that spell goes splat, which means..." I shrugged. "Walking nuke that could take out you, and every single one of your ugly ass pieces of crap you call kids."

"Lara-" Deans face was pure panic. "No, don't do it!"

He wasn't faking for the sake of tricking Eve or Cas, he was serious- But, so was I.

"Sorry, Dean. But I think it's a fair deal. You guys walk out of here in exchange for whatever Eve wants to do with me."

Eve smiled, and had she not been a flesh eating monster it would have been sweet.

"That's an interesting trade you're offering- But, I could kill you, and your brothers would still hunt me."

"That's true, but you know that they wouldn't be able to take you out. Think about it, there was only one Phoenix left in the world and we killed it. They would have no way of killing you... Me however, in a few years, could. So, if you ask me it's definitely a fair deal."

"Lara-" Sam said now. "You don't have to do this. It's not worth it if it means you being killed."

"Or-" Eve said with a smile. "I could turn her."

"Won't work." I shook my head, ignoring the horrified stares everyone was giving me. "Because of the spell, it wouldn't work." I stepped forward staring her in the eyes. "So, do we have a deal or not?"

"I could just kill all of you now and be done with it, why would I make any deals with you?"

"Because you agreed to letting them live if we rescued your mutant freak jobs."

"True- But, the agreement was you were to _not hunt me _in the process. You went back on your word."

Ok, this wasn't going as planned. I needed to kick it up a notch. So, with a deep breath I suddenly reared back and backhanded her as hard as I possibly could. I needed to piss her off, I needed to do something because if I didn't, she was just going to kill all of us anyhow. And that seemed to do the trick. Even though the blow clearly didn't faze her as far as pain goes, she still grabbed me by the hair and twisted me around until her arm was wrapped around my throat.

"You do have a death wish, don't you?" She asked, she was clearly not amused anymore.

"You have no idea." I sputtered out somehow, her arm was practically crushing my windpipe.

My brothers, Cas and Bobby tried to make a move but were quickly reprimanded and after tugging my head sideways until my neck was exposed, I locked my eyes on Cas' before I felt her sink her teeth into my skin.

"No!" Cas shouted, he struggled to break past the men subduing him but without his powers he clearly couldn't.

Sam, Dean and Bobby did the same, but it didn't matter. As soon as she swallowed a mouthful of blood she quickly released me and I fell to the floor.

She started choking, and holding her throat as what looked like a fire was erupting inside her chest.

"Phoenix ash," Dean said, as he watched her struggle to breath. "Shot a whiskey, shot of ash, down the hatch."

I held the wound on my neck that was bleeding pretty damned badly and scooted myself to a safe distance as she continued to choke. Only now she was oozing black and gray blood from practically every inch of her. She screamed, she clawed at her throat, she seemed to stare at the lot of us with an expression that was sheer surprise and terror. Finally the flashing inside her chest intensified before she slumped to the ground and stopped moving.

As soon as she was dead her monsters went crazy and tried to finish us off, but Cas suddenly rose his hand and shouted for us to close our eyes. With a bright flash of white light every creature was taken down and the room was dead silent.

Cas quickly stomped over to me and healed my wound, then yanked me up from the floor.

"Are you insane? Why, why would you do that?!" He actually shouted, and I think it was a first time for me actually hearing it.

"Because someone had to!" I shouted back, shoving him roughly on the chest. "You clearly didn't want her dead. You didn't come here to help us, you came here to insure we didn't kill her!"

Dean and Sam rushed over to me and yanked me out of reach after Cas didn't even try to deny that accusation.

"When will you begin to understand that what I'm doing is because I don't want things like this-" He pointed to Eves corpse. "To happen any longer?"

"Don't go spouting that crap again, man." Dean said. "It doesn't matter if you think you're doin it for a good reason because we will never agree with it."

"I can clearly see that now, so I suppose you've left me no choice-" He moved closer. "If you cease with trying to destroy my plans then I will fix him, remember that."

We didn't have the chance to ask what he meant by that because he reached up and touched his fingertips against Sams forehead. Sams eyes widened and he sucked in a deep lung full of air before collapsing to the floor and immediately convulsing. Cas disappeared seconds after.

"Sammy!" Dean crouched down and tried to hold him still.

His convulsing slowed down, but his eyes were rolled back in his head and he clearly couldn't hear us shouting at him.

"What did he do?" I asked, as Sammy started to seize. "Oh my god, what's wrong with him?"

"He broke the damn wall in his head." Dean said. "That son of a bitch."

"We gotta get him outa here, Dean." Bobby said. "Help me carry him."

"Just hold on, Sam." I said. "We're gonna fix this."

I ran for the pistols Eve had kicked to the other side of the room and scooped them up, handing them out to Bobby and Dean. I stuck Sams in my jacket but kept mine out as they struggled to lug Sam out of the mansion.

When we left the building and started through the forest again it didn't take long to notice that we were being chased by left over monsters. I fired into the bushes when one would become visible, but it did no good. We didn't have the proper weapons to kill whatever they were so I was mainly just hoping it would slow them down.

"Hurry!" Dean shrieked as he and Bobby struggled to carry Sam through the trees. "Sammy, just hold on!"

I was firing my pistol left and right as the unknown creatures chased after us. Sam wouldn't stop seizing, and his heart rate was erratic and no matter what we did he just wouldn't wake up.

How had it all come down to this? How could things have gone so drastically wrong? Just that morning, everything was fine... As fine as they could have been. And now... Sammy could be dying.

Dean and Bobby had no choice but to lay Sam down on the ground, he was seizing and convulsing to the point they couldn't carry him any longer. The fog enveloped us, and the snapping of twigs in all areas of the forest told us we were now being surrounded. I stared down at the gun in my hands, I had one shot left- Bobby and Deans barrels were empty...

We were screwed...

Dean traded spaces with me, taking my pistol as I crouched down beside Sam. I felt his pulse, noticing for the moment it seemed to be returning to normal, but he still wasn't waking up.

"We can't just stay here, Dean." I said as the footsteps surrounding grew nearer. "We need to keep moving."

He wanted to make a stand, to somehow try and find away of taking these monsters out- But with one bullet left, it wasn't possible. He relented finally as he and Bobby scooped Sam up a second time and started carrying him. We didn't make it very far before they both stopped and we listened to the sounds in the trees.

Nothing... Complete silence. The fog began to disperse and I could see that whatever had been following us was now gone. As if they just vanished into thin air.

"What the hell..." Dean said.

"Don't question it." Bobby said, holding Sams legs. "Let's just get the hell outa here before they come back."

We ran the rest of the way to the car and stuffed Sammy in the backseat, I crawled in as well and had to squeeze onto the floor as we finally sped off back towards Bobbys.

* * *

Sam was lying in the cot in the panic room, he hadn't budged for several hours and the only thing Dean and I could do was stand there and stare down at him.

"What do we do?" I asked. "Should we take them to the hospital?"

"We can't. I don't think they'd have a way to fix a broken wall in his head. Hell's spilling loose in there, there's not a pill for that." He answered.

"We can't just let him lay there, what if he doesn't wake up for days, or weeks? He'll die of dehydration."

"If it comes down to it, we'll take him in. In the mean time, let's just hope he snaps outa it, huh?"

He sat down with his elbows on his knees and I began to pace. So far it had been an entire day that Sammy was unconscious and there didn't seem to be any signs that he was coming out of it any time soon.

"Hey, uh- Why don't you go grab us something to eat? I'm pretty damn hungry and all Bobby has in the fridge is beer and a jar of olives." Dean said.

I knew that was his way of saying get lost, without actually spitting out those exact words. He wanted to be left alone with Sammy, so I didn't argue at all.

"Yeah ok, sure. You want the usual?"

"Sure."

I leaned over and playfully mussed Sammys hair, because I wanted to try and still treat him as I would if he was awake.

"Hurry and wake your ass up, lazy. We can't do shit without you." I whispered in his ear.

His brows twitched just slightly and as I passed Dean I patted his shoulder. The last thing I wanted to do right now was leave either of them. Sam was in pain and going through I didn't even want to know what, and Dean was of course blaming himself.

When I walked up the steps and back into Bobbys den he was sitting at his desk with a half empty bottle of whiskey beside him.

"How's he doin?" He asked.

"No change. But, thankfully he's not seizing anymore." I started for the door. "I'm gonna go get Dean some lunch, you want anything?"

"Nah."

Didn't think so. Truth be told I wasn't hungry either and felt like puking, but the last thing Sam would want us all to do would be to break down and hurt ourselves over this. Of course, he wasn't exactly able to lecture or yell at us right now either. So, if we wanted to head down a destructive path, then he really couldn't stop us.

Once I was in the impala and heading towards town I tried to take my mind off things by flicking on the radio. It wasn't comforting, and as soon as Deans choice of music started blaring in my ears I went into another daze as it was muffled and muted out.

Seriously, how in the hell did this happen? How could Cas do something so horrible to one of his best friends? I guess we were all naive to the fact that Cas was actually capable of doing something like that. We just always assumed he would have our backs. Yeah, he might have been doing something dangerous right now but never, ever, did I even contemplate he would actually hurt Sam so greatly. It only made me wonder, if he would actually do something like that to Sam, then what would he do to Dean, or me, or Bobby, if he felt threatened? What would be the next step, huh? Beating the shit out of us? Blowing us to smithereens? Seriously, what else would the guy do to stop us from stopping _him_?

I didn't know if he was watching me right then, but honestly it wouldn't have surprised me if he was. He admitted that he knew where I was every friggin second- So, I tried to keep it in my head that if for some odd reason he was actually following or watching me, I wasn't going to let him see that he had gotten to me. Maybe that's what he would have wanted? He must have sensed I held a soft spot for him, maybe he figured he could somehow manipulate me because of it. Well... Little did the sweet angel know but I was not the type of chick to be intimidated, or manipulated by some off the wall douche bag that was having a power hungry spasm. If anything I wanted to kick the crap out of him for what he did, I wasn't about to suddenly side with him now. Surely he must have known that?

When I finally pulled up to the diner and climbed out, I almost forgot to turn the car off and close the door. Yeah, I was severely out of it right now and could barely function. Of course, that might have had something to do with the slight hang over I had from the night before.

Thankfully the diner wasn't near full and I placed our orders pretty quickly. As I sat and waited I kept my eyes fixed on the tv, just barely paying attention to the afternoon news blaring on screen. I didn't notice a man sit down beside me at the bar until he cleared his throat.

"Excuse me?" He asked, and as I peeled my eyes away from the tv I realized he was talking to me.

I didn't know him, and didn't recognize him in the slightest. The only thing I could do though was stare at his low cut v-neck t-shirt with an arched brow. Didn't he know only chicks should wear shirts like that? He was a pretty good looking guy but there was something about his snarky attitude that immediately pissed me off.

"Uh, yeah?" I asked, immediately suspicious.

"Calm down, I'm not going to hurt you, Lara. Believe it or not I'm actually on your side here-" He seemed to peer over his shoulder as if someone might have been listening. "I'm taking a great risk by coming to you right now but let's just say I was backed into a corner."

Who the hell was this English chippy?

"Who are you?" I asked, really- I wasn't in the mood to fight anyone right now.

"Your brothers are acquainted with me, so don't worry. My name is Balthazar."

"That tells me nothing."

He rolled his eyes. "Alright, I'm an angel, now take your moment to ooh and awe or piss your knickers over it and let me get to the reason why I'm here."

I scowled immediately at him. "An angel? Well let me put on my big surprise face." I pulled out my wallet and paid for our to-go orders that the waitress sat in front of me. "So what do you want?"

"I didn't sign up for this nonsense, and I would have come to you sooner but you have that damned house angel proofed so I couldn't exactly pop in. I needed to wait until one of you left and I knew Castiel wasn't watching." He reached into his pocket and slid a folded piece of paper to me. "This is the location where Castiel plans to open the door... Tonight."

My body went stiff. "What?"

"Yes, you heard correctly. During the eclipse, he's got the location and he's opening it tonight. Which means you have to move your asses and stop him."

"Wait, wait a second." I grabbed his arm as he slid off the bar stool. "How did he get it?"

"Does it matter? He has it, and he's opening it and if you want to stop him then get back to Bobbys and tell your moronic brothers." He pulled his arm free. "There, I assisted, which means I'm done with this situation. I'm betraying a very powerful and very spiteful friend right now which means I'm putting my own ass on the line by coming to you."

"Why? Why do you care what happens?"

He shook his head. "Honestly? Because I don't want my brother getting himself killed, but of course he won't listen to me and he would only think I'm siding against him-" He paused in thought. "Which technically I suppose I am, but you understand don't you? Now, I really have to jet because the longer I'm here the more likely Castiel will realize I've tipped you off. Go home, tell Sam and Dean and do something about this."

He quickly disappeared right in front of me, not seeming to care if anyone in the diner noticed. Thankfully, no one did since it was near empty.

I sat there for a good thirty seconds in confusion, the only proof that this entire incident had even happened at all was the piece of paper in my hands. I didn't linger around much longer and grabbed our bags of food and rushed back to the impala. Needless to say I exceeded the speed limit ridiculously and when I flew back into Bobbys drive gravel flew every which way as I skidded to a stop.

After I pushed the door open, Dean met me in the doorway of the den.

"Whoa, what's wrong? What happened?" He asked. Yeah, it didn't take a genius to figure out I was freaking the frick out.

"Do you know an angel called Balthazwhatsajiggers?"

"Balthazar?" He arched a brow. "Uh, yeah- Met him once or twice before you were brought back, why?"

I shoved the paper in his hands. "He showed up at the diner, he said that Cas is opening the door tonight and that's the address of where he's doing it."

He quickly unfolded it and read it over. "Those were his words exactly?"

"Yeah, he said he's doing it during the eclipse. Whenever time that happens to be."

"Around 4 am." Bobby said, moving to stand beside Dean.

"Pack up the car." Dean commanded and Bobby sprung into action. "We're ending this... Tonight, once and for all."


	52. Chapter 52

**_Just as with other scenes that I didn't want to change too much- Such is this one lol. I don't wanna change a good thing._**

* * *

Dean was trying to be sympathetic- I could tell, but considering the situation it wasn't easy.

"Look-" He shook his head. "I get it. I do, believe me- But you gotta push past this, kid."

I stared at my half empty beer bottle, clenching my jaw. "That's easy for you to say."

"You think this ain't bothering me too? It is! In case you forgot, Cas has been my friend for almost four years. Hell, he's been like a second brother to me. Yeah, it hurts thinkin about this- But it's gotta be done. And I need your help with this. Sammy is... I don't even know- And me and Bobby don't got the juice to take him on alone. We need you, Lara."

"How am I supposed to follow you to that place and watch you kill him?"

"Maybe it won't come to that-" His voice said that, but his eyes said something entirely different. "Don't make me beg you here, kid. I know you care about him, I know it hurts- But this is gone way past just our feelings. We gotta take into consideration what will happen when he gets those souls."

My eyes moved to Sam, who was still unconscious. For purely selfish reasons I wished he would just wake up already so I wouldn't have to do this.

"Lara-" Dean lied his hand on my shoulder. "Snap out of it. Get your ass up and do your damn job."

Sighing, I stood from the chair and grabbed my stuff.

"Fine. Let's go now before I change my mind."

He led the way from the panic room after jotting down a message for Sam just in case he woke up. We left Bobbys house and jumped into the impala, speeding off into the night and to my worst nightmare.

* * *

Dean slowed the car outside the old dilapidated building. What seemed to be the remnants of a hospital if I had to guess correctly. There was a cracked and busted parking lot that was almost completely covered in vines of ivy and other spreading weeds. The windows on the building itself were equally covered, the entire roof looked like it would cave in at any second.

It was eerily quiet, and the darkness surrounding seemed to envelope and smother me like a morbid fog.

My heart was racing, my stomach was rolling. I was dreading every second that we inched closer as he finally pulled the car to a stop at the end of the dead end street.

No one budged, Bobby and Dean sat in the front seat, staring blankly at the building as though they too were dreading ever having the notion of coming to this place.

"Ok-" Dean said quietly. "We go in, no hesitations. Cause as soon as we stall for even a second..."

He trailed off, not finishing that statement because we all knew what would happen anyhow. I didn't want to think that Cas would ever hurt us, I would like to think that he thought more of us than that- But he had changed so much over the months that I barely even recognized him anymore. His mind had been so corrupted already by the souls Crowley had given him from hell, the only thing he could think of was more more more power. Defeat Raphael and his followers. Nothing else seemed to matter anymore, not even his friends.

We left the car behind, making our way towards the buildings entrance. I was in a daze as I followed, barely aware of what was happening around me. It was easier that way, to think of something else. To envision that instead of going to hunt down our dearest friend, that we were actually going to hunt some normal monster. A vampire, a shifter, something- Anything, other than Castiel. How could it have come down to this? To imagine your worst nightmare, your greatest fear, suddenly staring you point blank in the face and there's nothing you can do to stop it. I couldn't stand it- And as I followed Dean and Bobby inside, and we fought through a small group of demons- Still, I was in that cursed, and yet somehow blessed, daze.

I sliced through all of them with the angel blade Cas had given me months before hand, not flinching or batting an eye at the thought of their deaths.

We reached a room finally where voices could clearly be heard. Already I could make out Crowley...

Dean held his hand up, motioning for us to slow down as he slipped through an open doorway that led onto an almost balcony type platform. Below, in the center of the room, stood Castiel, Crowley and who I learned quickly was Raphael- Clad in a nice new feminine meat suit.

We listened silently for a moment, hearing the argument between the three. From what I could hear, Crowley had apparently sided with Raphael, and they were now ordering Cas to hand over the jar of blood in his hands- Claiming that if he didn't comply, he would be killed.

After glancing at the jar for a moment, he suddenly tossed it to Crowley and poofed away.

Dean passed a look to me, shrugging slightly before we moved farther onto the platform. He gave a nod to Bobby, who rose the angel dagger in his hand and suddenly threw it full force at Raphael.

Like magic he, or she, reached up and caught it right before it could pierce the back of her head. Afterwards, she turned and glared up at us and with a flick of her wrist all three of us were thrown from the balcony and across the room.

I crashed onto a small medical table lined with bloody utensils, and in the instant my body made impact I could feel more than one rib cracking. Dean and Bobby landed elsewhere.

"Just a moment." Raphael said. "We'll be right with you."

With every breath I took I was blessed with a stabbing pain, but somehow I pulled myself to my feet only then realizing that my own angel blade was now lying across the floor, way too far to actually make a run for it without getting exploded.

Dean and Bobby stood next, and but for a gash on Deans forehead, he seemed relatively intact, Bobby was cradling his left shoulder- But for the most part we were all in once piece. Dean passed me a panicked expression and we had no choice but to stand perfectly still and not make a stupid move.

We watched as Crowley painted a large symbol on the wall with the blood from the jar, while Raphael stood stiff with her back towards us. I couldn't see her face but I knew that she was smiling.

After the symbol was finished, Crowley grabbed an ancient piece of parchment with scribbles on it and started reading.

I tried to inch my way closer to Dean, but Raphael took a quick glance at me over her shoulder and I instantly froze.

Crowley was bellowing this chant or ritual like a crazed mad-man, and after emphasizing the last three words, he suddenly went quiet.

Everyone waited for the dreaded door to Purgatory to open- But after a deafening silence moments after Crowley finished with the chant- I gave a hopeful glance to Dean.

"What happened?" Raphael asked. "Why didn't it work?"

"Maybe I recited the spell incorrectly?" Crowley replied.

"Or, maybe it was the wrong blood." Cas suddenly said, appearing just behind us with a slight smile. He then lied an empty jar that had previously been filled with blood on the table.

"The wrong blood?" Crowley approached the wall, taking a swipe of the dripping ooze with his index finger, then licked it. "Oh, I see. Good old fashioned type A negative."

"Give us the blood, Castiel!" Raphael shouted.

Crowley rolled his eyes, and rubbed his forehead.

"Are you a bloody idiot? Look at the jar! It's empty!" He shouted. "He's already preformed his own ritual, the doorway's been opened... And, it's time now for me to take my exit."

Crowley suddenly disappeared.

Raphael actually seemed alarmed. "You have them... All of the souls?"

Cas replied to that by bringing forth an enormous amount of power, enough so that it was blindingly bright to the point that Dean and Bobby had to shield their eyes. I only watched in terror and disappointment.

"You can't imagine how this feels." He said, allowing the power to dim. "All of these souls inside of me. I really can't describe it... It's amazing."

"Castiel-" Raphael took a step back. "You allowed Crowley to escape, but not your own brother?"

He wouldn't wipe the smirk from his face, as he stepped closer, moving past me without even flinching.

"I have plans for him, something that only his talents could accomplish. You, on the other hand... Are expendable."

He rose his hand and after a snap of his fingers Raphael suddenly exploded into a mass of blood and entrails.

My eyes widened at the site, and I took a quiet step back. I just barely noticed Dean carefully motion me to move closer to him. But I couldn't budge.

When Cas finally turned around to face us, he was still smiling, and just from that expression alone I could tell- It definitely was not my Cas any longer. There was a coldness to his eyes that had never been there before- All traces of naivety and innocence were gone. All that was left was a cruel and emotionless shell of the angel I used to know.

"Cas-" Dean spoke, because clearly I couldn't. "You got him. Raphael's dead. Don't you think you could, uh... Put those souls back now?"

Cas arched a brow. "I save your lives yet again and that's the first thing you say to me, Dean?"

"Yeah, you saved us, again-" Dean agreed. "But think about it, man- You're a walking nuke, it's not safe. Those souls don't belong here, they need to be put back."

"No, you're wrong. These souls belong with me."

"Cas, please." Finally I managed to force words out. "This isn't you."

"It is now, Lara." He glared at me. "I won't be manipulated by you any longer. By any of you. The only thing you have done is use me for your convenience. _You _especially." My heart froze after he spat that out. "The only thing you have done was treat me like a servant, but that's not going to happen anymore."

From out of no where Sam suddenly appeared behind Cas and with a quick jab slammed the angel blade into his lower back.

After he was stabbed everyone went stiff, my heart practically stopped. Sam was shaking as he released the knife and fell to his knees.

Cas, still smirking, simply reached behind and pulled the knife out of his back.

"Sam-" He said. "I see you're finally back amongst the living. Although, you don't seem to be doing very well."

I didn't care if Cas was going to smite me or not, I darted from where I stood and helped Sam back to his feet.

"It was a valiant effort." Cas went on. "But the angel blade won't work on me any longer. Because I'm not an angel anymore..." He paused as I lugged Sam with me to stand beside Bobby and Dean. "I'm your new god- Which means you will bow down, and praise your love unto me, as your new Lord- Or I will be forced to destroy you... _All _of you."

* * *

No one moved for a good fifteen seconds before Bobby finally relented and was the first to get on his knees.

"You heard him." He said.

Dean fidgeted, unsure of what to do, Sammy was too delusional now to know what was happening so I helped him sit down. When I turned back and noticed Dean as well was down on his knees my jaw clenched.

Cas' eyes drifted over to me as he waited, and I shook my head.

"Cas, you've got to still be in there somewhere. Think about this. We're your friends, not your enemies."

"That might have been true in the past, Lara. That is, until you turned against me and Sam stabbed me in the back." He strolled a few steps closer. "Do you honestly expect that I would forgive that?"

"Maybe not-" Dean answered. "But deep down in that mind of yours you know that we were only doin what we had to do."

"And I'm doing what I need to do now. Raphael might be gone, but his followers are still out there. There is so much in the world, and in heaven, that needs to be tended to. And as your new God, I expect obedience." His smirk turned into a wider smile. `"I have a feeling you won't be compliant, Lara. It's just not in your nature to take orders. Before, that was one of the traits about you that I admired. But, that was in the past-When I was just your puppet. I'm not that any longer, I'm not your guardian anymore. Which means if you test me, I will destroy you right along with the other disobedient children."

"Ok." I shrugged. "If that's what you really think. I can't stop you. But you're wrong. You weren't just a puppet or a servant. You were our friend, and we care about you."

"You're only saying that because I've won, and you're afraid of being destroyed."

I shook my head. "No, I'm saying that because it's true. Think about it, Cas- Think of everything we've been through together, how much we've accomplished together. You don't need these souls anymore. They're just going to cause more harm than good."

Cas' smile faded and for an instant I saw a flicker of regret in his eyes, but it was so short and faint I wondered if it was even there at all.

"I hope that this is the last time any of you see me." He said before disappearing.

After he was gone Dean and I rushed to Sam, he was holding his head, his eyes moving every which way.

"You ok, Sammy?" Dean asked.

"Y-yeah." He answered. "I'll be ok, I think."

"Let's get the hell outa here-" Dean went on, tucking his hands under Sammys arm and pulling him to his feet. "Before the bastard decides to come back and finish us off."


	53. Chapter 53

My head was lying against the window in the backseat, and I watched the street lights flicker as we drove under them. No one was speaking, because really- What was there to say? No words could describe what happened tonight, there would be no consolation, no words of encouragement... Nothing. It wouldn't be possible. The only thing left to do was drive back to Bobbys and dwell in the misery that we had each lost our best friend.

I noticed Deans eyes shift to the rear view mirror as he drove, and I tried to avoid his gazes. Sammy was half asleep in the passenger seat and Bobby sat beside me.

Maybe it sounded dramatic or pathetic, but I honestly believed that death would be a comforting release right about now. I really did think we could stop him, that we could talk him out of it. I thought that Cas would actually come to his senses and realize that what he was doing was so incredibly wrong.

But he didn't... And now he was gone...

If it wasn't bad enough that he didn't listen to us and still gobbled up all those souls, but he had actually threatened to destroy us. That I just couldn't grasp. His mind had been completely corrupted and taken over by Purgatorys monsters, there would be no going back from there.

We drove all night until returning to Bobbys, and the day after was the same as the last, and the day after that... Pretty soon a week had dragged by so agonizingly slow I wanted to blow my brains out. Castiel had started his "work", smiting those that opposed him, starting with religious leaders. By the time another week had gone by there was a stack of bodies left behind in practically every state- But along with that a few so called "miracles". He was healing the sick and blind, a leper colony in India had been completely cleansed.

Dean and I were going stir crazy, so we gave ourselves an at Bobbys home project- Which was pretty much rebuilding my car. Cas had never fixed it, but I guess that was completely irrelevant now. We had to start from the inside out. Since I had no engine left, we had to rebuild one. I wasn't much help, since my mind was elsewhere and Dean relied on me mainly to hand him correct tools. But at least it was something.

Sammy, well- He was telling us everyday that he was ok, but Dean and I both knew that wasn't the truth. Often at times, late at night, when he thought no one was watching- We would see him staring blankly off at nothing, freaking out over some unseen monster that wasn't really there. He wouldn't talk about what he was seeing, and would deny it whenever we'd question him.

"Hand me that socket wrench, kid." Dean said, interrupting my thoughts.

I dug through the tool box before tossing it to him. Afterwards grabbing two beers from the cooler and twisting them open. Dean took a gulp of his before lying it on the roof of the car.

"So, how you doin?" He asked.

"Me?" I shrugged, taking another gulp of beer. "I'm fine, why?"

"You know you can talk to me right?" He stared down at me in that big brother way.

"About what?" Turning away, I pretended to rifle through the tool box.

"You know what about... About Cas."

"There's nothing to talk about when it concerns him, Dean."

He leaned against my car, staring off at the junkyard. "We all took it hard, Lara. Especially you, now if you need to talk about it..."

"I don't." I swung around, narrowing my eyes at him. "I'm fine."

"No, you're not-" He pushed away and stepped closer. "You're keepin all this negative shit bottled in and if you don't do somethin, or say somethin, you're gonna explode."

"Wait a second-" I held up my hand, snickering. "Since when are you a therapist that wants to talk about feelings, huh? I thought you hated chick flick moments?"

"Yeah, that's true. But, this is different. So-" He held up his arms, resting again against the car. "Talk to me."

"Seriously, Dean. I'm fine. I have nothing to say."

He didn't believe me, but thankfully we were interrupted when Sam walked over to the garage.

"What's the good word?" Dean asked sarcastically because really, when were there ever good words?

"Well, an entire church of Scientology was blown to pieces last night," Sam answered, sighing. "Witnesses saw a trench-coated man leaving the scene."

"Maybe you misunderstood me, Sammy. I said _good_." Dean scowled, burying his head back under the hood of my car. "But yeah, what else?"

"Uh, few more deaths here and there. Apparently he's makin sweeps through state prisons and preforming his own executions on child molesters and murderers."

"Hm." I shrugged. "Can't really disagree on that one."

"Yeah, but things are really getting out of control, guys." Sam took an interest in my beer and stole it. "We gotta do something about it."

"What can we do, Sam? He's god now." Dean retorted.

"Well, there's gotta be something we can do? Some way to take him out..." He paused, glancing at me. "I mean, maybe we can talk to him again."

"And say what?" I said now. "Oh, Cas- Please, won't you be a dear and put the souls back in Purgatory? Yeah, Sam- I think I know how that'll go." I made an exploding motion with my hands, adding the sound effect while I was at it. "Splat, like Raphael."

"So unless you got some magical book that tells you how to take down god-" Dean went on. "There ain't nothing we can do."

Sam sighed, finishing off my beer. "Ok, so- Your plan is to just keep yourself stuffed under Laras car?"

"Yep-" Dean climbed out from under the hood, wiping his greasy hands on his t-shirt. "Cause that's what I can do right now. Fixing her car, and makin sure you're both ok."

Sam and I both stood defiant- Neither one of us wanting to admit that we weren't holding up nearly as well as we tried to portray. Dean could see right through both of us, there would never be a chance that we could pull the wool over his eyes.

Sam and Dean returned inside for some lunch, leaving me alone by my car. I started to clean up a little, putting tools back in their proper place or else Bobby would have a conniption.

I don't know what it was, but after tripping over the tool box and dropping my empty beer bottle, watching it shatter on the pavement- Something in me snapped. It was like I had just been hit by a freight train of emotions, overwhelming me all at once. Everything that happened, everything Cas said and did just seemed to fly at me and slap me in the face.

I lost it...

Beside me leaning against the garage was a sledge hammer which I quickly grabbed. The nearest vehicle within reach I started pounding on- Shattering the windshield, the windows, busting holes through the hood and trunk. I swung that damn thing until I couldn't feel my arms anymore and kept on going. With every swing and hit I let out a scream, every single pent up emotion or uncontrollable rage was let out until the handle on the sledgehammer snapped in two.

I threw the remaining piece as far as I could before collapsing to my knees and sobbing into my hands. No, I didn't cry, I never did- And the first time I actually allow myself to do it I couldn't control myself. It was gut wrenching, the type of cry that tugs at your very soul and rips you to shreds, the type that aches and eats at you right to your very core. I couldn't breathe, my lungs were aching, my hands shaking to the point I could barely function.

Falling back against the car, I took my knees up into my chest and curled up into the fetal position. Damn him, and damn me for letting myself actually believe that he would do the right thing.

* * *

He had watched the entire episode. Watched her destroy one of the parked vehicles and eventually the sledgehammer itself. It was the first time he had ever seen her lose control like that, and it actually frightened him. She was sobbing on the ground into her hands to the point she barely even breathed. He had no idea how he was supposed to respond to this.

One part of Castiel hated to see it, the small part of himself that managed to leak through the aggression and self entitlement the souls had created. But then the dark side, the one that had been growing stronger and larger while his true self began to shrink and disappear, felt some sort of pleasure out of seeing Lara in so much pain. And that as well, frightened him. He tried to push that part of him away, the part that had threatened to destroy his friends if they didn't obey. But it was slowly taking over his mind everyday.

He glanced down to his right hand, noticing the patch of melted skin was growing larger, only taring his eyes away when Lara went on a second tirade and started throwing random objects across the junkyard. A brick soared past his head, which he ignored. She couldn't see him, it was just her emotions getting the better of her again.

The voices in his mind were growing louder by each passing day, more dark and violent. Commanding him to kill and destroy when the only real mission he wanted was to create a peaceful existence. They weren't satisfied with that though, these voices- They wanted blood-shed and pain and he just couldn't control them any longer.

_Kill her. _A voice said. _Just kill her and be rid of her entirely._

"No." He said aloud, but no one could hear him.

_Kill her. Burn the house to the ground. _Another voice said.

"I won't do that. Stop saying it."

_You're weak. Let us out, Castiel. Let us out!_

He grabbed his head with a cringe and fought against them with everything in him- Trying to get their horrible voices to stop. But they were constant, blaring inside of his head to the point it actually ached. He quickly fled before they could take control yet again.

* * *

Long after my outburst I sat on the ground, resting against the smashed remnants of a vehicle, sipping at a beer and just staring blankly at my car that was nearly complete. My eyes were puffy and sore, my head was aching, and I knew for certain that my little emotional breakdown was a long time coming. No, I wasn't proud of it, in fact I felt pretty damn stupid for losing it like that- But, it was needed. If I didn't do something, if I didn't let it out, then there was every possibility I would have taken it out on someone who didn't deserve it. Such as Sam or Dean.

I heard gravel crunching as footsteps neared, and I looked up to see Sam towering over me like the friggin empire state building.

"You ok, kiddo?"

"Fucking dandy." I answered. He sat down beside me, avoiding the broken glass as well as possible. "I guess you guys heard me in there, huh?"

"Yeah-" He gave a weak smile. "Kind of hard to miss you screaming and smashing a car with a sledge hammer."

"No comments." I quickly replied.

"I wasn't gonna tease you- Remember, I'm not Dean?" He smirked and I only rolled my eyes. No, I wasn't ready to smile back just yet but he was making it hard not too. Damn his puppy eyes! "I guess we all have our ways of dealing with crap."

"Yeah, and what's your way of dealing, huh?" I shrugged. "I haven't seen you lose your cool yet."

He rested his head against the car door. "Yeah, well... It's kinda hard to know what to do when you're hallucinating."

"I'm sorry. You wanna talk about it?"

He snickered. "Lara- I came out here so you could talk about your crap, not mine."

"I don't wanna talk about my crap. My crap is my crap, not yours. Believe me, I guess I'm dealing as well as I possibly could."

He glanced around the junkyard. "Well at least you won't run out of cars to smash."

"So, talk to me then-" I lied my beer bottle aside. "You gotta tell someone what you're going through."

"I dunno. I, uh, don't know if that's such a good idea. I don't really want Dean to know about it."

My eyes fell down to his bandaged hand that he had cut sometime during the moments after Cas got the souls.

"You can tell me, Sammy. I won't tell him if you don't want me to. You need someone to help you out through all of this."

He sighed, for the moment he seemed relatively peaceful, which was a pleasant change as of late.

"Well, I guess... I'm seeing the one thing in the world that I would never wanna see."

"Hell?"

"Basically, but yeah... Lucifer mainly."

I shuddered slightly, but tried not to let him see it. "And? What else?"

"Let's just say that he's just as big an ass in my head as he was in real life." He tried to smile and play it off, but I could tell he was freaked.

"So he's tormenting you and shit?"

"Yeah. He keeps sayin that all of this isn't real, that I'm still in the cage with him."

"You know that's not true... Right?"

He looked at me, almost as if he was really trying to decipher if I was real and not just a figment of his imagination.

"I think so. I mean, it's kinda hard to ignore all the crap goin on here and not believe it's real." Now he nudged me. "Enough of my drama. Now you talk to me."

I turned away. "What do you wanna know?"

"You can say you're dealin with this whole Cas situation all you want, but we both know you're not."

"What's your point?"

"I dunno. I guess that you need to stop blaming yourself for it. Cas made his choices on his own and there wasn't anything we could to do stop him."

My eyes fell to the ground, and I tried to push away just how damned empty I felt.

"It feels like a nightmare. I keep waiting to wake up, but... It never happens." I said, my tone quiet. "It might be easy for you and Dean to push it aside, but... I can't."

"I know. But, you felt differently about him than we did."

"That's in the past."

"Not really, and it won't be for a long time. But what I guess I wanna know is, is if somehow we found a way of stopping him- Would you actually be there to help, or..."

"Would I run away?" I interrupted.

"I wouldn't blame you if you wanted nothing to do with that."

I forced myself to my feet as did Sam, and I brushed the broken glass from my backside.

"I'm not going anywhere. If I was gonna take off over this then I would have already. And, as much as it hurts I know that we have to stop him. We just don't exactly have a way of doing that just yet."

He stared off at the house, his jaw clenching and lips cinched. "Yeah, uh. You should come inside."

"Why? What's going on?"

"Nothin, just... More crap Cas has done."

"I don't think I wanna know." I started walking towards the house as the contents of my stomach inched its way up my throat.

And I was right, in the last couple of hours more things were posted online from shit Cas had done in the last couple of days. Not only was blowing up an entire church not enough for his wrath, but he for some odd reason completely derailed a train in Japan and killed nearly two hundred people, and injured several hundred more. What the point of that was, I had no idea. So far he seemed to only be going after those that opposed him, but what did a friggin train full of innocent people have to do with anything? A few strange fires were set in multiple countries and in the US- An entire small town was completely obliderated by what the journalists claimed was "A freak gas line explosion" only of course, witnesses that survived the horror claimed to have seen, go figure, a man in a trench coat escape the flames unscathed.

He was going insane... This power was clearly scrambling his brain to the point he had no remorse or common sense. This was just senseless killing now.

Dean and Sam had been sparing me obviously and keeping information away from me. But now, they were sharing everything he had done- And I knew why. It was because there was no chance of saving him now, and the only thing we had left to do would be to take him down completely. Which meant, I was going to have to watch him die.

But, we had no way of doing that. The second we would try to make a move against him he would slaughter all of us without second thought. So, for the next few days we had no choice but to sit back and cringe at every single news article or video we watched. The final straw that broke the camels back, aka Deans, was another spree Cas committed on a group of political consultants. We watched the video in horror as he started laughing in the middle of these people, staring point blank at the security camera on the wall before going ballistic and taring their throats out.

It was the first time actually watching the crimes first hand after Sam had hacked into the police stations data base. And seeing it once was definitely enough for me.

"We gotta do something. We can't just sit here anymore." Dean said.

"How?" I asked. "What the hell are we supposed to do? We're not strong enough to take him on, and neither is anyone else."

Dean and Sam exchanged glances for a moment before Sammy nodded. "Yeah, we might have someone."

"Who?" Bobby asked.

"The only one we know that's got the juice to swing it." Dean sighed, glancing up from the table. "Death."


	54. Chapter 54

After Deans not so intelligent thought, we didn't have the chance to object before he was down in Bobbys basement and preparing the spell for summoning Crowley. Sam and I obviously weren't thrilled with the idea but we were well past the point of being able to sit and ponder. So, I stood awkwardly in the background as Dean dropped the lit match in the bowl and after a poof Crowley suddenly appeared in the small devils trap Bobby had spray painted.

He was holding a half empty bottle of scotch in one hand, and a glass with ice in the other, and once he realized where he was he turned and let out a curse.

"Bollocks. What the hell is this?" He asked.

"Hi. Long time no chatty." Dean said, smirking.

"You've lost your mind-" Crowley shook his head. "Do you have any idea how dangerous this is? Castiel has got me on lock down, if he notices I'm missing because you girls want to conspire..." He paused arching a brow. "That is why I'm here isn't? To deal?"

"More or less." Sam answered. "We need to know how to bind Death."

"Bind Death?" Crowley went wide eyed. "I think you've been hitting your head on too many ceilings there, giraffe. You can't bind Death."

"Why not?" I asked. "Lucifer apparently did it."

He only glared at me. "That was Satan, darling."

"Doesn't matter-" Dean stepped forward. "We need to know the spell."

"Why?"

"Why do you think? Because he's the only one with the muscle to take down Cas, now are you gonna give it to us or not?" Dean shrugged. "Cause we could just keep you here all damn day if you want."

Crowley poured himself a shot and quickly gulped it down. "Bind Death. You're not as cowardly as I thought."

"Yeah, you can compliment us later, buttercup. Just give us the spell."

Crowley continued to grumble. "Look, if you want it so badly I'll give it to you. Really, you'd be doing me a favor by snuffing out that pretentious little tree topper, but I can't give it to you here. If you let me go, I'll make sure you get it... Deal?"

"Why not just give it to us now?" I asked.

"Because I don't bloody have it, it's locked away in my super special hiding place, now- Let me out and I'll send it to you. A deal is a deal is a deal, and I won't break it. I want Castiel gone just as badly as you do. What can I say, I don't fancy much my new employer." No one moved and he rolled his eyes. "Really? If I don't follow through all you have to do is summon me again, right? You can trust me, at least for the moment since we're practically dancing on the same side?"

Dean glanced back at Sammy and me and we both shrugged- So he stepped forward and scratched a line through the devils trap and Crowley smiled, stepping out.

"You'll hear from me soon." He said, then vanished.

"I hate that guy." I spat.

"Yeah, who doesn't." Sam sighed.

So now we had to wait, which felt like years when in actuality it was only a couple days. We received an unmarked package in the mail, which contents were the spell scribbled on a parchment. Dean and Bobby gazed over it nearly a million times before going through Bobbys special pantry. He had all but one of the ingredients for this spell, and the last one was what Dean described was the act of god that had been "crystallized forever". More or less, a fulgurite, which of course wasn't exactly something you could pick up at the local grocery store. They were extremely rare, and expensive as all hell, at least for the size of the one we would need- So of course we couldn't buy one.

Thankfully though, Bobby found the documents of an online auction where a pretty large crystal was sold to some wealthy doctor in Illinois.

So, we packed up our things and hopped in the car to make the drive.

I was pushing my feelings aside this time. I had to. I couldn't think about what we were going to do, because this clearly wasn't our Cas anymore. He had changed into a monster, had killed so many people we couldn't even count the bodies anymore. There was no telling what else he did that hadn't even been reported yet. So, I told myself over and over, this was no different than any other monster we would gank.

Yeah, of course that was complete bullshit. It was different, it was incredibly different because those other monsters hadn't been my best friend. They hadn't been one of the only people in the world that I relied upon completely. So, I could try to pound that crap into my head all I wanted to- I knew it wouldn't do any good. Watching him die was going to make me want to die right along with him.

I knew Sam and Dean weren't taking it much better than me- But of course Dean had a way about him that could mask pain, usually by inflicting it onto others. Sam however, was stricken mute as we drove. Bobby had nothing to say either, so- I guess I wasn't the only one that was flipping out over this.

When we came to the house where the god thingy was, or crystal- Whatever you wanna call it, we parked about a block away and jogged to the back where a door was located which seemed to lead into the basement. It was pretty damn late and all of the lights were off inside, so hopefully the couple living here were asleep, or better yet, maybe not at home at all.

Sam picked the lock just as easily as always, and we stepped inside and started up the basement stairs to the first floor. Afterwards separating to search the massive house for the crystal. I followed Sammy one way, while Bobby and Dean went in opposite directions.

I'll say one thing about these people- They certainly had a lot of money and weren't afraid to show it. It was kind of ridiculous really, all of the extravagant things they had lying around. Now, I wasn't an art dealer and didn't know much about it, but I clearly recognized a Picasso hanging above a small end table, and dozens of antiques scattered around.

Sam shook his head at me, as we realized the room we stood in was clear of the crystal, so we headed for another which looked to be a second living room. Seriously, how many living rooms does two people need?

My pocket vibrated and I pulled it out noticing it was a text from Dean in another section of the house.

_Got the god thingy. _He said and I snickered slightly. _In the study we passed on the way through._

"He's got it." I whispered and Sam nodded.

We started back for the study and rounded the corner, stopping abruptly at seeing a man and woman bound and gagged in two arm chairs.

"Hey guys." Dean said, as Bobby as well entered the room. "This is Mr. and Mrs Weiss."

"Hello." Sam and I said awkwardly, and I gave a little wave.

"Nice to meet you." I said, fidgeting. "You have a lovely home. Don't worry, we aren't going to kill you."

The woman mumbled something under her gag and I fumbled for a moment before following Dean to a desk.

Bobby started mixing the ingredients in the bowl, crushing up the crystal along with it. The last item was blood, which Dean offered since he was the one that wanted to have Death bound to him- and once it was over, Bobby drew a symbol on the desk, sat the bowl atop and started reciting the chant.

Dean arranged a sort of peace offering for Death, which was pickle chips and onion rings, paired with a soda. And once Bobby finished with the chant it went unusually silent until the room started to violently shake- So greatly that the walls began to crack, plaster and ceiling tiles crashed to the floor, then just as quickly as it had began it abruptly stopped.

The couple tied to the chair behind us were clearly shaken, for all they knew we were conducting some sort of weird satanic worship.

"Hello?" Dean called out. "Death?"

Everyones eyes darted all over the room before we heard a response.

"This has got to be a joke." He suddenly said, magically appearing out of thin air beside the desk.

I jumped slightly at seeing him, remembering the first time I encountered the man. It was funny how someone who clearly didn't look like much as far as physical threats went could be so intimidating. There was something in his cold beady little eyes that made me want to piss myself. But I suppose of course, seeing is that he was Death and all, it wasn't that confusing.

"Sorry, but it's not a joke. We need to talk." Dean replied.

"What other choice do I have?" Death scowled, holding up his arms as what looked like a glimmering rope could be seen around his wrists for a split second. "You've bound me."

"Yeah, well I can explain."

"Let me guess-" Death moved around the desk, his cane tapping against the hard wood floors. "This has to do with Sam and his hallucinating, well I'm sorry to say but there's only one wall per customer."

Dean immediately looked back to Sam who stood beside me. "What?"

"That's not what this is about-" Sam said, ignoring Dean. "We need you to do something for us. We need you to kill God."

Death arched a thin brow. "Kill God? What's caused you to believe I'm actually capable of that?"

"Well, you told me." Dean answered. "Ya know... Before."

"I'm sorry, let me rephrase that-" Death leaned against the desk. "What makes you believe I would _want _to kill God?"

We all looked at each other before Dean cleared his throat nervously. "Well, it doesn't matter if you want to. You have to, since we're kinda like your bosses now."

Sam, Bobby and I went stiff after that comment.

Death wasn't impressed with it obviously. "I have a feeling this isn't going to end well for you all."

Dean motioned towards the fast food baggy on the end table. "Uh, pickle chip? Or onion rings? They're supposed to be the best in the state."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better? Bribing me with food?"

I swallowed a knot in my throat. "I know it probably doesn't, but- It's not like we'll keep you bound forever."

He shifted his scary eyes to me now. "You were lucky the last time you died, Lara- But if you test me I'll be certain your soul is never found again."

I shut up after that- Yeah, I think it would be better if Dean handled this. He somehow seemed to have some sort of amicable relationship with big daddy reaper, and for some reason I just seemed to piss him off.

"Look, can you do it or not?" Dean stepped forward. "Well, I know you can, so will you?"

"This is unbelievable." Castiel suddenly said, appearing in the archway.

Everyone jumped after hearing his voice, and for a moment after I finally allowed myself to look at him- I didn't recognize him at all. He looked... Well, he looked as though he had just went ten rounds with a pack of rabid animals and came out the loser. He was bloody, his skin looked as though it was trying its best to remain intact.

"I can't believe that this is how you repay me." Cas went on, stepping into the room. "After I spared you and let you live." He shook his head. "That's over now, you've erased whatever emotional attachment I might have felt."

He raised his hand and I waited for the inevitable splat that would come afterwards, but Dean said.

"You can't kill us. Because, Death is bound to us- Which means, we can't die."

"This is what you're referring to as God?" Death asked, looking almost amused. "I see nothing more than a mutated angel standing before me."

Cas obviously wasn't pleased to hear that. "And who are you to know what God is? You're only a fly swatter."

"Destined to swat you, I bet." Death replied with a smirk.

"Or I could crush you before you got the chance."

"Castiel, look at yourself. Your vessel is melting, you can barely contain all of those souls."

Cas didn't seem fazed. "As soon as I'm finished with my work then I can repair myself."

Death shook his head. "No, because it's more than just those millions upon millions of souls, there are other things much darker than _souls _in Purgatory- And you inhaled those as well."

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

Still, Death glared at me. Seriously, what the hell did I do to the guy?

"Long, long before God created angels, or life on earth, he created the very first beasts. Something called Leviathan. Personally I found them hilarious, but God was concerned they would devour everything in their site and destroy his work- So, he created Purgatory and cast them into it. And now, this angel is the only thing containing them and he's nearly ready to explode." Death was clearly way too amused with this situation. "They're dark, and extremely powerful and the only thing they crave is blood-shed and destruction."

Cas' brows furrowed slightly, for some reason that comment seemed to affect him. But it didn't last long.

"This is irrelevant." He said.

"All of this is irrelevant right now dammit- Just kill him already!" Dean shouted.

Cas turned and glared at the three of us, I didn't exactly see anger in his eyes as much as I saw pure confusion.

"Fine-" Death raised his hand and nearly placed it against Cas' forehead when Cas snapped his fingers and the binds around his wrists broke. "Oh... Thank you."

Death strolled past Castiel and to a leather armchair beside the fast food baggy, after he sat he crossed one leg over the other and popped a pickle chip in his mouth.

"Such an interesting night. I had a very strong feeling I might have been reaping someone." He glanced past us and to the couple bound and gagged. "Don't worry, I don't mean you."

There was a whoosh in the room as Cas suddenly disappeared. So, now we were stuck in a room with a very pissed off daddy reaper and there really wasn't anything we could do to stop him from squishing all of us beneath his feet.

"Look, uh..." Dean said but Death rose his hand.

"Stop, just stop. Really, Dean- I'm surprised at you. Did you really think you could actually bind me and then not suffer the consequences?"

Sam grabbed hold of my wrist, as if he expected to drag me out of the room in time before being slaughtered.

"So, is this the part where you kill us?" Dean asked.

"Normally, yes- But, I find that arrogant little angel irritating. And, besides- Having him roaming the planet is destroying the natural order of things. He needs to be dismantled, so to speak."

"So, you still want to reap him?" Sam asked.

"No, this is not my responsibility. This is your mess to clean up-" He crumpled up the empty bag of food. "You need to force him to put those souls back where they belong."

"Even if we could somehow convince him of that-" I said. "How are we supposed to do it? We can only open the door during an eclipse."

He pulled himself to his feet and sighed. "Then I'll create another. The morning after next at 4am. Be punctual because I won't be so helpful the next time around. This is your one and only chance to clean up your mess. So clean it up." He casually strode towards the door, pausing before exiting. "And, if you try to bind me again- The results won't be pleasant for you... Nice pickle chips by the way."

He left the room now and the only thing we could do was stand there, thankful at least for the moment our bodies hadn't been reduced to quivering mounds of guts on the floor.

* * *

We were back at Bobbys and since we got there Sam and I had been hitting the books in the den- Trying to find some sort of spell that might, in a way, bind Cas from fluttering off so we could force the souls out of him. Of course we couldn't just ask him, after the incident from the previous night it was more than apparent he wanted us dead. We had a time limit, and it was quickly ticking down. But unfortunately we weren't having any luck on finding anything, because, there had never been a situation like this before. No one was ever stupid enough to try and force someone with the powers of God into something, and if there had been- Well, obviously they didn't live to tell the tale.

Sam looked up at me from over the book he held. "Nothing still, kiddo."

"Yeah, here either." I slammed my book closed. "What the hell are we supposed to do about this?"

He didn't answer and instead stood and walked into the kitchen, I followed.

Dean was sitting at the kitchen table with the laptop in front of him and a beer in his hand.

"So, I was thinkin-" Sam said. "Maybe we should try calling Cas. I know it's risky, but- We have until tomorrow morning to convince him."

Dean just barely flicked his eyes towards us. "Not gonna happen, Sammy."

"Why not?" I asked.

"Because- It's over, you know that- I know that. Cas isn't gonna give up those souls on his own, and we have no way of forcing him to do it."

"Ok-" Sam shook his head, letting out an irritated laugh. "So, you just wanna sit there and do nothing?"

"Yep-" He sat back. "Because that's all I can do. I'm gonna sit here and drink my beer, maybe watch some porn-" I cringed. "And watch the world implode."

"Wow, Dean." I crossed my arms over my chest. "Never woulda figured you to be the type of guy to just lay down and die."

"Shut up. I'm just tellin it like it is. And you're one to talk- You've been itching to get yourself killed for months now."

I scowled after that and let out a sigh. "That was before. I've snapped out of it and I'm thinking clearly again. Which is something you need to do."

"I am thinking clearly-" He clicked around on the laptop. "And _realistically,_ which is more than I can say about you two."

Sam sighed in annoyance, then nudged me and motioned with his head to follow him. I did and we left the room and out the front door. He walked a good twenty feet or so away from the house before shrugging.

"Dean's not gonna help us out. Which means we gotta figure something out. I don't know what his problem is, I guess he's just reached his limit." Sam trailed off as the cool spring breeze whipped around us. "Try praying to him, Lara. I'll try praying to him. It's the only thing we can do now."

I nodded and wrapped my arms around myself. "I guess I can try. But, yeah... Something tells me it won't work."

He tried to remain optimistic as he went his own way into the junkyard and I went another. Privacy was much needed for something like this, at least for me it was.

When I reached the garage I walked over to the table and sat on top of it, letting out a long winded sigh.

"Cas... I'm sure you know who this is, and... This is probably the most difficult thing I've ever had to do- I know that you're not exactly happy with me right now, or Sam and Dean, but... I don't know... I know that you're still in there somewhere. And I know that deep down you regret what's happened." I rubbed my temples and tried to fight back tears. "You heard what Death said last night. He said it was those things, the Leviathan or whatever, that's been messing with you. I know how you are, you're not the type of person that would kill so many people and do those horrible things. You have to see now that these things are controlling you. They're turning you into the very thing that you were dead set on destroying." I listened to the deafening silence around me. "There's still a way out, we have a way to help you. Death is going to create another eclipse tomorrow morning at 4. Which means, you have that much time to end this. Please, you know I don't like to beg or plead or turn myself into a sniveling idiot- But I'm begging you here- You don't have to do it for me or my brothers, do it for yourself. Just... Do the right thing, please?"

Yet again, I listened to the silence. I didn't expect a response- He didn't give a rats ass about me or my brothers anymore and I knew my so called prayer would fall upon deaf ears. But, I tried... Just as I'm sure Sam was trying. So, I sat there for several long minutes, until the point the chill was freezing me since I hadn't worn a jacket, to the point I couldn't feel my fingers any longer before I finally got up and walked back into the house.

Sam had already returned inside, and he passed me a quick glance that told me instantly- He hadn't informed Dean of what we had done- And he wanted to keep it that way, just in case. So, I kept silent and sat down beside him at the table, trying my best to ignore the heated stares Dean was giving us. Yeah, we might not have told him what we'd done, but he wasn't stupid. I'm sure he figured it out the second he saw both our faces. But, he didn't say anything, instead he merely pursed his lips and returned his eyes to the laptop screen even though it was apparent he had little interest in whatever he was looking at.

When there was a sudden whoosh in the room we immediately jumped to our feet.

"I heard your prayers-" Cas said, leaning against the door frame. He looked even worse than the night before, and even then it was bad. "Please help me."


	55. Chapter 55

**_The site messing up sucked, and I didn't get to respond to some comments I received so I'll just say it here. Thanks everyone! You're awesome!_**

* * *

The drive back to the abandoned hospital was awkward. Cas was unconscious most of the time, but whenever he was awake I knew Sam and Dean were freaking out worrying if he was going to go ballistic and start smiting us. I on the other hand, tried to remain optimistic. I told myself he was going to do the right thing now, that finally this Purgatory nonsense could be over and done with. And, yes. I was well aware that more then likely Cas wasn't going to survive the process- Which I tried desperately not to think about. Honestly? I was just happy he was actually letting us help him, finally.

When we got to the building Sam and I helped him walk inside and to the same room the ritual had been preformed in the first time. He was too weak to stand, so we sat him on the floor to rest against a pillar. We started preparing the area- Moving tables and things out of the way so the wall was clear.

"Lara, help me shove this." Dean said, pointing to a tall metal stand.

I helped him scoot it across the floor as Sam brought out the paper with the incantation written on it.

"There's a jar of blood in the hallway-" Cas said weakly. "On the third shelf, behind a small metal box."

"Ok, got it." Sam lightly tapped Cas on the knee. "Is there anything else?"

He shook his head. "No... Sam- I just want to apologize to you for what I did. It was very wrong of me, and... If I had the strength, I would fix you."

"Yeah, Cas- I know." Sam gave a weak smile, taking this much easier than I figured he would. "Just hang tight, we're almost ready."

He patted his shoulder and left the room, disappearing down the dark hallway.

"Lara-" Cas said, afterwards trying to brace himself against the pillar, he looked nearly ready to pass out. "Do you think you could sit here with me... For a moment?"

Dean passed me a glance which I ignored, and I knelt down on my knees beside him.

"Do you need something else?" I asked.

He shook his head and reached a wobbly hand out and latched it onto my own. "I want to apologize- To try and make amends before I die." He looked to Dean who was obviously lingering. "Dean, I'm sorry. What I did was more than wrong, it was deplorable and I know that I can't expect forgiveness, but I just want you both to know- I regret very much what I did."

Dean nodded, shirking it off as if it were nothing. "Ok, well. Does it make you feel better now that you've apologized?"

"Not in the slightest... You?" Cas' breathing was labored.

"No, not really." Dean shrugged and went back to moving crap around.

Cas looked to me now. "There's something I want to talk to you about. If you would at least hear me out."

I nodded. "Yeah, of course."

"I know what you've been doing, Lara. The way you've been acting. You've been heading down a dangerous path, one that's very destructive. Even though you didn't know it, I have been dropping in on you from time to time- And during the moments of clarity, when the darkness in my mind had faded, what I saw from you frightened me."

I went stiff, then nodded. "Yeah. I know. It's not exactly my proudest moments, but- I guess I just don't handle emotional trauma very well."

"I would hate to think that after I'm gone that something might happen to you. That's the last thing I want." He paused, and choked in a few gasps of air. "And, I know I'm not in the position to ask for any favors, but if you would do me one request?"

"Ok, name it."

He somehow managed to smile slightly. "Promise me that you will stop this. That you will go back to the way you used to be. Fight with Sam and Dean, stop with the recklessness, don't try to sacrifice yourself every time something dangerous happens to come around."

"What the hell is takin Sam so long?" Dean asked, interrupting our conversation.

"I'll check it out." Bobby replied, heading down the hallway where Sam disappeared.

"Lara." He squeezed my hand. "Will you promise that?"

I stared into his eyes, thankful to see that they had returned to the way they used to be. Kind and peaceful.

"Ok, yeah... I promise, Cas. No more suicide runs for me." Surprising enough, I actually meant it.

"Thank you."

Bobby rushed back into the room with the jar of blood in his hands. "Sam's gone, I don't know where."

"What?" Dean stopped what he was doing. "Are you sure?"

"Well, he ain't in the hallway anymore, just left the jar lying in the middle and now he's gone."

"Dammit-" Dean paced for a moment. "Ok, we don't have time for that right now. We gotta finish this."

Dean began to paint the symbol on the wall, all the while glancing at his watch over and over again. Once he was finished, he walked over and scooped Cas up from under his arms.

"Ok, it's time, man. You ready?" He asked.

"Yes."

We helped him into position, making sure he was steady before letting go and taking enough steps back to be at a safe distance. Dean nodded to Bobby and he started reading from the paper as Cas wobbly stood there staring blankly at the wall. Halfway through the chant the wall began to shake as the bloody symbol began to glow and crack. Before it opened, Cas gazed at us from over his shoulder- The sadness in his eyes was overwhelming.

"I'm sorry." He said. "I'm sorry for everything."

As the door finally opened the wind whipped around us in a wild frenzy. I clenched onto Deans arm as a bright golden light shot forth from Castiels chest and was sucked into the abyss.

It was a surreal moment, which lasted less than a minute but it felt like hours before the light finally stopped, the door slammed shut and Cas slumped to the floor. We quickly rushed over to him and Dean turned him to lie on his back. His eyes were closed, and he wasn't breathing.

"Cas?" I said, lightly shaking him by the shoulders.

Bobby felt for a pulse and then shook his head. "He's gone."

Deans face completely drained of color, just as I'm sure mine had. Yes, we both knew that Cas wasn't going to survive this, but there was always the hope that maybe by some miracle, he would.

"Cas, you stupid s.o.b." Dean said, shaking his head. "Why didn't you know better?"

He stood and paced slightly, rubbing his hand through his hair. Bobby reached over and patted my shoulder and I couldn't pry my eyes off of Cas.

When he suddenly sucked in a lung full of air, and instantly every single wound on him healed Dean darted back and crouched down.

"Cas?" He said. "You hear me?"

His eyes opened and he grunted slightly. "Yes, that was far from pleasant."

"I can't believe you made it through that-" I said, as we helped him back to his feet. "How did that happen?"

"I honestly have no explanation." He seemed to be in pretty good shape as he stood up straight and stared at Dean and I. "Before anything else is said- I want you to know that I plan to do whatever I can to redeem myself for my actions. I know that it will take time..."

"Let's not worry about that right now, huh?" I said. "I think we should just get the heck outa here."

"I agree." Bobby said. "I've had enough of his place for a lifetime."

Dean was unusually silent, but his expression told me that he was just relieved to have the good ol' Castiel back. Our joy was short lived however when Cas suddenly took a deep breath and doubled over, then responded to it by giving Dean and I slight shove.

"Run!" He said. "You have to leave, quickly!"

"What the hell?" Dean grabbed my wrist and tugged me away slightly. "Cas, what's wrong?!"

"It's the Leviathan!" He doubled over again as his body started spasming and jerking violently, but suddenly he stopped, stood up straight and grinned. "You're too late!"

We hadn't the chance to make a move before he grabbed Bobby and Dean and threw them across the room. They each crashed into tables and old shelves before slumping to the ground. I was next as he stomped forward and grabbed me by the throat and slammed me into one of the pillars.

"Cas?" I choked out.

"Castiel is dead, gone." He smiled. "It's just us now."

He threw me next as I smashed into Dean who was just pulling himself to his feet. Just as always Dean stood in front of me for protection, and the only thing we could do was stand there and watch Cas, or whatever was in control of him, pace back and forth.

"We've been waiting a long time for this." He said, his eyes had completely lost their sheen. "And it is going to be so much fun."

I felt myself inch closer to my brother because there was clearly black veins running up the side of Castiels face, not to mention just a crazed and maniacal grin. It was terrifying, and the thought that maybe somehow Cas might still be in there watching this happen only made it even more horrible. Somehow I just couldn't allow myself to believe he was really dead.

No one could speak, we could only wait to be slaughtered- But suddenly Dean and I both seem to notice that there was a black substance dripping down Cas' arm and hand.

"Your vessel is melting." Dean said, almost happily. "You're gonna explode."

He fumbled slightly on his feet as the black ooze started to drip down his face.

"This isn't over-" He said. "We will be back... For _you_."

With that Cas turned and hobbled out of the room and down the long dark hallway. Bobby, Dean and I ran in the same direction since that's where Sam had disappeared. We needed to find him before something even worse happened. There was no telling where he had ran off to, or what had caused it- Even though I had a pretty good suspicion. After all, it was only a matter of time before Sams hallucinations got the better of him.

By the time we reached the area where Sam had disappeared Cas had already pushed his way through an open door and left the building. Dean led the way through another door after we heard the sounds of quiet mumbling. Inside a room lined with rusted out metal shelves we finally saw Sam, pressed against the wall with his arms flailing out in front of him. He was choking, as if some unseen force was strangling the life out of him.

"Sam!" Dean rushed to him and grabbed him by the shoulders. "Sam, snap out of it!"

Sam didn't hear him, or see him- His eyes were fixed dead ahead as pure terror etched across his face.

"Sammy." I grabbed one of his hands and gave it a yank. "Sammy, please. Fight past it, it's not real. Whatever you're seeing isn't real! Lucifer isn't real!"

Dean glared at me after that, he knew that there was something up with our brother, but wasn't aware of the details. I suppose I just gave it away.

Finally Sam blinked a few times over, as air managed to squeeze through his windpipe. He slumped slightly as reality was slowly beginning to sink back in.

"Dean?" He said, his voice was parched and dull. "Lara?"

"Yeah," Dean patted his shoulder. "Comon, Sammy. Let's get the hell outa here."

"Where's Cas? Did it work?"

"Not exactly." Dean started off in the last direction we saw Cas run off to.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Bobby grumbled something quietly. "Means he put the souls back but not everything went with em. The Leviathan stuck around, killed Cas- Or sent him away, and took over his vessel."

Sam blinked a few times over, sending me panicked expressions. I could only look away and cringe. Maybe I needed a heaping dose of reality as well. I was still finding all of this hard to believe.

When we left the hospital behind there was a clear trail of black ooze on the ground which Dean followed. By the time we reached the end of a tree lined path we could see Cas busting through a chain link fence and hobble forwards towards a lake. He didn't stop as he started into the waters edge and kept on walking until it was deep enough that he was submerged.

Dean skidded to a stop next to the edge before the rest of us, and by the time I stood beside him the water began to swirl into an enormous whirlpool as a burst of black suddenly shot off in all directions and spread through the water. Once the black faded the ripples in the water died down and Cas didn't come back up.

"What the hell was that?" I asked.

Bobby took a few steps closer towards the fence and shook his head. "Balls... This ain't good."

When we turned to see what his eyes were fixed on, we each went stiff at seeing the sign for the local water supply- Which meant, whatever those black things were, the Leviathan if it was actually telling the truth, had no way of being stopped, and they were long gone now and would end up who knows where.

Dean jerked slightly, his eyes catching site of something in the water as he knelt down and scooped it up. We each piled around him and I felt my heart drop to my stomach.

It was Cas' bloody trench-coat.

Seeing that was like a brick flying and striking me straight in the chest. There was no denying it, and no way of pretending anymore. Cas was gone... For good.

Cas was dead.

* * *

The drive back to Bobbys was all too familiar unfortunately. Just as the night had been when Cas had taken the souls from Purgatory, no one had anything to say- And now that we had managed to get him to put them back... The results were just the same. He was gone, and there was nothing we could do to bring him back.

I rode with Bobby this time around, since Sam was sprawled in the backseat and Dean didn't seem to want conversation. And as I watched the trees fly by, I tried to understand how it had ended up this way. To think, that not long ago everything was as good as it could be, considering. We were all together, Cas was still fighting along side with us- He was my friend, no- He was more than my friend, only- I couldn't quite understand what he would have been considered. It was no big secret that he and I had some kind of connection, just as he had with Dean. Of course he was Sams friend as well, but it was different. It was just something that had no explanation. It ached me to the bottom of my soul to know that I would never see or talk to him again.

But, I couldn't think about that, not now- Because we had a hell of a big mess on our hands and my brothers and Bobby would need me to help them out. Besides... I had made a promise to Cas before he died and I intended to keep it.

"You ok, kid?" Bobby asked.

"I'll be fine."

"You sure? You ain't got much of a chance to talk without the boys over hearin- If you wanna talk to me..."

"Thanks, Bobby. But, I think that I just want to forget about it. I made a promise to Cas that I wasn't going to go back to the way I had been. And, if I sit and dwell about him being gone, then that's exactly what will happen." I sighed. "We all knew what this would bring. We all knew that Cas wasn't going to make it. It's just a hard pill to swallow."

I sort of drifted off into a daydream after that as Bobby began to ramble about losing loved ones and friends, but you just have to muscle through it.

It was strange... I knew Cas was dead. I had seen it myself, and there was of course a hollow empty feeling left behind from that, but... There was also something else along with it.

I couldn't cry... I couldn't shed one single tear.

I tried to tell myself that it was because I had somehow mentally prepared myself for that dreaded moment, that I was simply tougher than I originally thought, but no- That wasn't it. It was because, even though every sense was telling me he was gone and not to distrust what I had seen with my own eyes, my heart just couldn't believe it was true. Why, I didn't know. Maybe it was a form of denial, I wasn't sure. But I just couldn't really and truly believe he was gone, my heart wouldn't let me. Of course something like that was dangerous. Living in denial would only end up ripping your emotions to shreds eventually. You couldn't go on living in la-la land believing something was going to happen that never ever would.

Sure, I told myself that over and over again in my own mind. That I was being stupid, and stubborn- That there was no way Cas could have survived that whole mess. I didn't want to live in denial and then one day, out of no where, be struck by that damned freight train of emotion and heartache like I had after Cas took the souls. Somehow, and I wasn't sure how... I was going to have to move on and forget him. I imagined the best way for that to happen would be to take down the bastards that had killed him. Those damned Leviathan creatures.

But in the days that passed there was absolutely no sign of them. Of course, we didn't exactly have a way of identifying them either. All we knew was that they bled black ooze, and that wasn't much to go on.

After a week at Bobbys we had a sort of intervention for Sam- Or as Dean liked to call it. "Open up and tell us the damned truth." He wanted to know what he was seeing, what Lucifer was saying to him, or doing. Sam was reluctant to talk about it- But after his outburst at that old hospital he couldn't exactly deny the facts any longer. So, he finally spilled the beans and told Dean everything. About his hallucinations and the tortures he'd been forced to relive. Lucifer tormenting him day after day. Dean was surprised, and _not_ at the same time. I mean, he knew that something was up with his little brother but I guess he didn't figure it would be to that extreme. So, while Sam, Bobby and I were trying to hunt down the Leviathan, Dean was doing his own bit of research on how to fix Sammys broken wall. Which of course, didn't exist. The only one that might be able to help him would be Death- And there was no way he would actually do it again. It was a miracle all in itself that he actually created another eclipse so we could put those souls back.

I had been sitting at the table near the garage for nearly two hours when Dean finally walked his way over and sat down. He handed me a beer, which I gladly took and a piece of his pie, which by the looks of it, he had eaten on before actually getting to the table.

"How you doin, cupcake?" He asked.

"I'm ok, Dean." I smiled. "Really. You can stop asking me that."

"You sure about that?"

"Yeah- I know, some really bad crap has gone down lately, which of course upsets me, but... I'm doing as well as I can."

He nodded and took a sip of his own beer. "It's just, ya know- Sammy and me, we worry. Can't really help it, comes with the role of being a big brother I guess."

Nodding, I pecked at the pie on my plate. "Well, I'll be fine. Just worry about yourselves, ok?"

"Kinda hard to do that. Lara, you've scared the crap out of us lately. I know that I'm not really one to lecture over stupid or dangerous moves, but- The stuff you've done in the last few months really takes the cake. Even for me."

"I know..." I trailed off, staring off at the color streaked sky. "Dean. There's some things about me that you don't know about, a reason I guess that I might be that way."

"Such as?"

This wasn't exactly an easy topic for me, and it was something that I hadn't told anyone, ever- Not even Bobby.

"Well, you know how John was, how he acted, right?"

"Oh yeah."

"Ok, yeah, well- He was never around, as you know. So, when the rare occurrence happened to come along that he would come for a visit, I was really happy-" Dean actually looked surprised to hear that. "Until, he started drinking. You know how he got when he was drinking, he wasn't exactly a very nice guy... Anyways I hadn't seen him in nearly two years when he showed up at my foster parents door. I was fourteen at the time- He wanted me to go with him on a hunt. To make a long story short, something went wrong during this hunt, he got angry as he usually did, said some hurtful things, and there ya go."

Dean arched his brows, obviously not satisfied with that story. "What did he say, Lara?"

"Oh ya know. That he wished I was never born, that I had been a burden since he found out about me. Blah blah blah. He took off after that and I didn't hear from him again until someone called to tell me that he'd died." I shrugged, trying to play it off. "So, I guess my point of this is, is that I might act like a wretched bitch sometimes, or make sarcastic smart ass comments, I might be reckless, and not care about getting myself ganked- But, the reason for that is because I guess I'm just trying to prove to myself that John was wrong. And, of course, I want to prove myself to you and Sammy."

He let out a deep sigh, staring off at nothing while shaking his head. "I can relate. Yeah, for a long time I idolized our Dad, tried to be just like him. But, it seemed that no matter what I did, it was never good enough. Sammy too, it seems like they were always butting heads. I dunno, man- After our Mom died it was as though Dad just stopped caring." He reached over the table and nudged me. "But just cause that's the case, doesn't mean Sam or I feel the same way. You don't have nothin to prove anymore. You've showed us a hundred times or more that you can hold your own."

I nodded, tapping my fingertips nervously against the table top. "I think what set me off these last months is the fact that Cas just up and ditched us. I felt like he ran out on us, ran out on me, not to have a Dr. Phil moment here, but it drudged up all of those emotions I felt after John took off. Which, in turn, caused me to go bat shit insane."

"Stress of the job, kid." He winked at me. "But yeah, I get it. It sucks ass when it turns out being a friend that fucks up so badly."

"Well-" I sighed. "That's over and done with now. And now that our drama fest is over and I've explained myself a little bit to you, maybe you can stop thinking I'm just trying to get myself killed or something."

"Ya know-" He seemed to ignore that. "Back when Sammy wanted to take off and go to college, and Dad found out. He told him that if he walked out the door then to never come back again, so yeah- You're not the only one to have a dead-beat Dad, cupcake." He picked up his beer. "But, let's just not think about that anymore, got it? All that doesn't matter anymore. Just as long as I know you're not gonna jump in the mouth of a monster, then we're good."

I smirked at him, and he stole the pie back since apparently I wasn't eating it fast enough. In a matter of seconds he had the plate scraped clean and his lips were stained cherry red. Ya know, sometimes, even after all this time it still amazed me that I had brothers who I actually cared about. I really didn't know what I'd do without them. As crazy as they were.

"Any word on the Leviathan?" I asked, and he immediately tensed.

"Nope. Nada."

"I don't get it. What the hell are they waiting for, huh? They wanted to chew our pretty faces off, they even said they'd come back for us, so... What the heck are they doing?"

"Don't know. I guess we'll find out when things turn bloody again." He sighed.

Yeah, that was a lovely thought. Just as always we would have to wait for a pile of bodies to stack up to actually get a lead on these bitches. But, something told me that these were not going to be as easy as some little ghost or shifter. After all, they had been locked in Purgatory by God himself because of how dangerous and horrible they were. So, I suppose you can imagine my thoughts right then.

We were so unbelievably screwed.


	56. Chapter 56

It had been quite a while since I had experienced a strange nightmare, or any other symptom from the spell dissolving. No headaches, or nausea no inexplicable comas. I hadn't zapped myself to some unknown location either. So, when I woke up a few mornings later drenched in sweat and clenching the bedsheets in terror- For a moment I couldn't help but ask myself if it was just a nightmare, or... If it was from _that_.

It didn't seem to be so, since I hadn't awoken somewhere else this time around- But, it was definitely strange. Mainly because it was the first time that I had ever dreamt such a thing where someone else blessed me with their presence in it. It was Cas, he was broken and bloody lying on the rocky banks of a raging river, surrounded by shapeless black things. They were moving closer, the only thing visible on these mounds of darkness were gaping mouths with razor sharp teeth. I kept screaming for him to get up, to get the hell out of there but he wouldn't wake up. His face was snow white, his lips a dark shade of purplish blue. I had seen enough death in my lifetime to know that he wasn't alive, and these creatures were going to inhale him. Still, I screamed, I waved my arms- I shrieked until my throat felt raw but it did no good. When I was finally lucky enough to wake up from that horrible mind fuck he was completely enveloped by the black creatures.

Ok, I tried to calm myself down. This was just a nightmare. It was easily explained- Cas was gone, my mind was finally trying to come to terms with that and as ways of completely screwing with me- My subconscious decided to make me relive the horrible moment all over again. This wasn't a sign of something, this wasn't caused from the spell. This was simply because Cas was gone...

Yeah, I could tell myself that until I was blue in the face and it did no good. I could have a million nightmares where my stupid subconscious would scream at me that it was true, and I just couldn't believe it. Could it be sheer stubbornness, or just plain denial? I didn't know. But it definitely seemed plausible.

After wiping the sweat from my face I pulled the covers off and climbed out of bed. I could hear the clinking of dishes downstairs so I knew at least one of the boys were awake and eating breakfast. So after a quick wash up, I joined them, trying my best to act normal and not still freaking out from my nightmare.

It was Sammy that was awake and in the kitchen cooking breakfast. And just before asking where Bobby and Dean were I saw them moving from the kitchen window. Dean had acquired a flat tire sometime in the last day or so and they were changing it.

"Mornin." Sam said from over his shoulder. "You hungry?"

"Not really, no." I sat at the table and rubbed my temples as he turned to look at me.

"You feelin ok? You look kinda pale."

I shrugged. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just a rough night is all. Nightmares and all that fun crap."

"Nightmares? Hey, it's not the, uh, ya know... Spell thing is it?"

Now I shook my head. "No, not that. It's just past events coming back to haunt me."

"Ah-" He sat across from me. "I think I get it. Wanna talk about it?"

"I dunno. Maybe-" Since Sammy had trusted me enough to share his hallucinations and everything he was going through I should at least do the same. "Let's just say I'm having a hard time coming to terms with Cas being gone."

He sat back and stared aimlessly out the window. "Yeah, I know the feeling. It's kinda hard to believe."

"It's not just that... It's not that I'm not logical here, I know what happened and what I saw. And I keep telling myself that he _is_ gone, but there's just a feeling-" I pointed to my chest, trying not to be over dramatic. "There... It's telling me I'm wrong."

He nodded and offered me a kind smile. "I'm pretty sure that's normal, kiddo. You had feelings for him, so..."

"Hey, whoa!" I suddenly sat up straight. "Don't go pulling observations out of thin air there, jumbo. I never claimed any such thing."

His eyes rolled and he let out a raspy chuckle. "Ok, fine- He was your _friend_. So, of course you're not gonna be able to just snap back from him dying. It's gonna take time, and not just for you... For all of us."

"Tell that to Dean-" I huffed. "He's goin on acting like nothing happened. Yeah, I know- Cas did horrible awful things, really really _baddd _things- But, in the end he tried to fix it and Dean is acting like he doesn't give a crap at all."

"He does, Lara. But you know how Dean is. No chick flick moments. He likes to shove that crap aside and pretend it's not there. Trust me, this is just as hard on him as it is on you. I mean, do you think he would have kept Cas' trench-coat in our trunk if he didn't care?"

I mumbled something under my breath and rested my chin on my hands. "I guess. I figured he might have done that for me."

"Maybe he did, a little." He nudged me with his foot. "Ok, so breakfast now?"

Talking to Sam always made me feel better, with his puppy eyes and infectious little smile- So I agreed to eat a little something.

Breakfast consisted of toast and sausage links and it seemed Deans hound like senses told him it was time to stop with the car and come in for food. Bobby followed soon after and as soon as Dean slid his plate onto the table and took a seat he gave me a wink in greeting.

"So, Bobby thinks he might have found somethin." He said.

"What kind of something? Sam asked.

"Black ooze something-" Dean shoved a sausage link in his mouth. "Some teenagers were ripped apart in a locker room at their high school. From what we've heard, there's not much left of em."

"How far are they?" I asked now.

"About an hour from here." His eyes were clearly sending me messages again, and I knew instantly what they were. The Leviathan were getting close, close to _us _again. "So, you guys up for checking it out?"

"You know I am." I didn't even have to think. The sooner I could off those creepy buggers the happier I would be.

"Same here." Sam said, although he didn't look nearly as enthused.

"Let's get goin then. We've stalled enough." Dean pushed away from the table.

Instantly I knew just by his actions that I was wrong. He cared, and the way he was going to show it was by taring apart every single monster that had taken Cas away. I just hoped that Dean wasn't going to make the same mistakes I had, and become reckless and not giving a crap what happened to him. Nah... He wouldn't, because even though it was hard for me to admit- Dean was ten times smarter than I was. He knew better than to allow his emotions to get the better of him.

Within a matter of minutes we were ready to hit the road, and Bobby waved us off as we peeled out of the driveway.

* * *

We flashed our badges, spewed the usual crap and within minutes were escorted in to the locker room by another fed. And the second we stepped through the door all three of us skidded to a stop and could only stare with our eyes wide.

It looked like a slaughter house in there. There was blood and other disgusting blobs strewn across the floors and splattered on the walls. Whatever was left of the teens that had been chomped down on, which wasn't much by the way, was scattered in random fleshy bits. There wasn't even enough left of those poor kids to identify. Unless of course, a DNA test was done.

Dean took a few steps inside first, followed by Sam and I. We were careful of where we walked, seeing is that practically every inch of the place was covered in gore.

"Wow." Dean said, eying the room from floor to ceiling. "This is, uh... Well I don't know what the hell this is."

"Looks like someone put those poor kids in a blender." I commented, moving past Dean and towards a row of smashed lockers.

Sam noticed something in the distance and pointed towards it. "Guys-" He stepped closer and motioned towards a knocked over bench where a few small streaks of black goo remained. "Looks like you were right, Dean."

"So, Leviathan actually did this?" I asked, shuddering. "And they, what? Eat people? Well why am I not surprised, what monsters don't."

Dean grumbled his way to a man holding a camera, he was snapping photos of the wall of terror which was basically solid red.

"Any witnesses?" Dean asked. "Or were they slaughtered too?"

The man clicked a few more pictures and shook his head. "Crazy thing is, is that two kids walked out of here and passed a few other students before they left the school- Apparently their uniforms and faces were covered in blood, and- What the students said was pieces of skin. I dunno, maybe they were stoned or somethin cause there wasn't any sign of these so called kids. But, the witnesses are pretty shook up, obviously. They're saying they went all Jeffery Dahmer on the swim team."

Dean passed glances at Sam and I. "Cannibals? Comon, that's just... Nutty."

"Yeah-" The man clicked a few more pictures. "What can I say. Kids will smoke anything these days."

"Any explanation though on the cause of death?" Sam asked, even though it was pretty apparent they were eaten.

The man snorted, he was way too amused with this situation. "Well, there isn't much to go by. What you see here is pretty much all that's left. The bigger pieces were taken down to the morgue. I'm just the photographer, so if I were you I'd head on down there."

Dean arched both brows and turned away, shaking his head as we left the blood bath and back into the hallway. We avoided the other officers and ducked under the yellow crime scene tape.

"What are we gonna do?" I asked once we were out of hearing range. "We have no way of tracking these things. There's no telling where they went?"

"No-" Dean pushed the double doors open and we stepped back outside. "But we know where they're gonna end up. Sioux Falls. They're after us."

"And you wanna head back there and wait for them?" Sam asked. "Without any way of knowing how to take them out?"

"Yeah it's not a flawless plan, Sammy- But we gotta figure something out. Only one way to learn how to kill a Leviathan and that's if we capture one."

My stomach twisted into knots at that thought. "I don't think that's a very good idea. Think about it, Dean- They were strong enough to overpower an angel, what do you think they could do to a threesome of squishy humans?"

Dean stopped at the drivers side door of his impala. "Got any better ideas then?"

"Yeah-" Sam answered. "We go back to Bobbys and lay low- And research our asses off until we have something concrete."

"Ya know- Last I checked, there wasn't anything on Leviathans to research." Dean shrugged. "We didn't even know they existed until Death mentioned them. If we haven't, then what makes you think anyone else has?"

Sam sighed. "There has to be something somewhere, Dean. Creatures like this can't exist and there _not _be _something _written about them."

Dean flicked his eyes towards me. "What about douche..." He paused, seeming to stop himself. "What about Lee?"

"I don't know-" I shrugged. "He might know something, but I don't think he's exactly eager to help us anymore. Call me crazy, but I think we piss him off."

"Could you call him anyways?" Sam nodded. "Couldn't hurt to try, right?"

Normally I would be annoyed by the request, mainly because Lee just rubbed me the wrong way. Yeah I was grateful to him for helping us as many times as he did, but I dunno. There was something about him, something I couldn't quite put my finger on that said I couldn't trust him completely. He was shady, and I didn't know why.

"Lee- If you hear this can you maybe come down and give us a hand. We've got a flesh eating issue." I said.

We all three glanced around the area. Nothing... Normally Lee would zap on down before I could even finish a sentence but this time, nope. He was a no show.

"Huh-" Dean opened the car door. "I'm sure that can't be good."

After climbing in and backing out away from the school Dean headed for the morgue next, hoping maybe the monsters left behind some trace of something that might be useful to us. In a way though Dean was right. We weren't going to be able to find a way of killing them if we couldn't capture one. But, capturing one could, and probably _would_, come back to bite us in the ass... Literally.

We made it to the morgue and stared down at unidentifiable blobs of tissue lying on the examining table. Dean cringed as he looked up at Sam and I with a disgruntled expression.

"Yeah I don't think there's much to go by with this..." He pointed to the mound of something. "Whatever the hell that's supposed to be."

"From what we can tell-" The medical examiner said with a shrug. "It looks like maybe a fragment of stomach tissue- Of course right now it's a little hard to tell."

Yet again, Sam asked the question that was already completely obvious. "Any idea what did this?"

"Best guess?" The man pulled off his glasses and shrugged. "Looks like an animal attack to me. Of course, one might ask just how a pack of wild dogs, or wolves, wandered their way into a high school and into a locked locker room, ate the swim team, then left without anyone seeing them."

Dean snickered and I quickly elbowed him.

"How about a less logical explanation?" I asked now.

"Off the record?" I only nodded in answer. "Some psychopath killed these kids somewhere else, brought what was left of them to the school and decided to paint the walls with them as some sort of morbid sign of his work. Of course, I can't tell anyone else that. Because whether I like to admit it or notThese kids were clearly eaten... By _something_."

He moved across the room and to his desk where a plastic baggy lied. He picked it up and held it in the air.

Mine and my brothers faces went blank. There was a piece of tooth inside of it, it was sharp and jagged and like nothing I had ever seen before.

"Any idea what kind of animal that came off of?" Dean asked. Seriously, why do we even bother asking these questions? But I guess we had to make it look convincing that we were clueless.

"Do I look like a zoologist to you?" The doctor huffed.

"I think we're going to have to confiscate that." Dean said, walking over and practically ripping the baggy from his hand. "For tests."

He stuffed it into his inner jacket pocket and headed for the door. After nodding goodbye to the medical examiner we left the morgue and started down the steps.

"Ok, so Leviathan got big scary sharp teeth." Dean said, sighing.

"Lemme see that thing." Sam said, practically mugging Dean as he reached into his pocket and yanked out the baggy. "Ya know. There really isn't a way of knowing for sure it was actually Leviathan."

"_Really_?" Both Dean and I said in unison.

We glared at each other afterwards and I shook my head. "Sam. Think about it, what else would it be. I've never seen a tooth like that, and I highly doubt you have either."

"Still not a definite sign of Purgatory monster." Sam shrugged.

"What about the black ooze?" Dean retorted. "Haven't ever seen anything like that either."

Sam sighed and his eyes wandered off as he gaped at something across the street. He went completely silent and noticeably stiff as Dean and I followed his eyes.

There was nothing there, nothing but hanging flower pots on the shop window.

"Sam!" Dean snapped his fingers in front of his face. "Snap outa it."

"Yeah-" Sam tore his eyes away, flinching slightly. "Sorry, just got distracted."

"Now it's gotta be Leviathan. It's the only thing that makes sense. They're gonna keep moving closer and closer to where they know we'll be." Dean took the baggy back. "Think about it. They were inside Cas, they probably read his thoughts- Got all the info they needed on us, they're moving closer, Sammy."

"Maybe." Sam rubbed his temple. "But do you think it's such a good idea to go back to where they know we'll be?"

"Nope-" Dean yet again opened his car door. "But we're not gonna leave Bobby there to tangle with them on his own."

"Quick phone call." I added. "Tell Bobby to get the frick out of his house. We can meet up somewhere else and talk about this."

Almost like radar Deans phone began to ring, he pulled it from his jacket and held it in the air showing it was from Bobby.

He answered and put it on speaker.

"Yeah, Bobby- What's up?"

"Might have an issue here. Got a phone call about two minutes ago from Sheriff Mills, she's in the hospital and called me whacked outa her gourd sayin there's some Doctor eatin folks. I'm on my way to check it out."

"Whoa-" Dean objected. "I don't think that's such a good idea, Bobby. You shouldn't go off on your own."

"Well, I can't leave her in there."

"We're only an hour away-" I said. "Just wait for us."

"Can't. If it's true I can't sit on my ass doin nothin- She said if I didn't get down there then she's gonna do somethin. And she's all hocked up on pain medication. Just get back and meet me at my place."

He hanged up and we listened to the silence for a good ten seconds before we climbed in the car and sped off.


	57. Chapter 57

Just our luck halfway back to Bobbys the engine of the impala started sputtering and we had no choice but to pull over while Dean took a look. And after mumbling something about the fuel pump, we had no choice but to call for a tow. Had I been superstitious, I would think that this was some sort of twisted sign giving us the big middle finger- Telling us that we wouldn't be able to get back to Bobbys in time to help him out.

Of course we each took our turns in calling Bobby to tell him what was happening, but he didn't answer, and for the moment we were stuck in the middle of no where and couldn't exactly steal a car. So, we rode back into town in the tow truck, and after parking at the garage Dean motioned towards a diner across the street, not because of food- But because there was a variety of cars to choose from that we could "borrow" in the mean time.

I dialed Bobby again, letting out a relieved sigh when he answered so I put it on speaker.

"What you got, Bobby?" Dean asked.

"Well, she wasn't lyin-" Bobby was clearly distressed. "This... _Thing_... Was immune to silver buckshot and had a mouth on it like I've never seen. I got Sheriff Mills outa there and sent her home, I'm headin back to my place now."

"So you're ok?" Sam asked.

"Define ok?" Bobby flippantly replied. "But yeah, I still got all my limbs if that's what ya mean. He didn't get a chance to chew em off." He cursed under his breath. "Definitely Leviathan, the thing knew me from bein inside Cas."

"Don't go home, Bobby." I said quickly. "You can't go back there, they know where you live."

He ignored my comment. "Where are you idgits anyways?"

"Car broke down-" Dean grumbled. "As soon as we can find another worth taking we'll be there asap."

"Well, hurry it up. I don't think they're gonna be followin me. Before I bashed his head in he mumbled somethin about me not being their target for the moment. Pretty sure that meant they're comin after you."

Dean snatched my phone away and held it close to his face. "Did he say anything else?"

"Only that they've got a pretty good set up there at the hospital, people dyin left and right they got a 24/7 open buffet line. Don't matter how they die, they're masquerading as Doctors and nurses, got the place full. So if patients suddenly stop breathing, no ones gonna question it."

I rested my forehead against the roof of the car and let out a deep sigh. "How are they doing it, how are they walking around in the open like that?"

"They're like shifters, except for the fact that they like to gobble up their victims." Bobby went silent for a moment and in the background we could hear the car of his engine turn off. "I'm back at my place. Just get your asses back here pronto."

He hanged up and I took my phone back before we crossed the street to the diner.

"Hey, guys-" Sam said. "Quick bathroom break, I'll be back in a second."

We watched him enter the diner and Dean carefully slipped through parked cars until finding one towards the back of the building. It would be less noticeable to steal that one then any of the others, but still just as risky. The diner was packed, which meant it wouldn't take long for someone to suddenly notice their car was missing. Plus there was always the thought that Dean didn't want to leave his baby there at that garage. Had we not been in a man eating monster situation Bobby could have easily towed the car back to his place and Dean could have fixed it himself.

Dean and I barely paid attention to a car that pulled out of the drive, that is, until fifteen minutes later when I let out a sigh and glanced at my watch.

"What the heck is taking Sam so long? Did he fall in?" I asked.

After my sarcastic question suddenly a switch seemed to be flicked in Dean and I as we both stared at each other in shock. He quickly turned and darted inside the building while I waited by the door. He wasn't in there for thirty seconds before he rushed back out and grabbed my wrist.

"He's gone, he went and crawled out of the friggin bathroom window." He said.

"What the eff... Why?"

He didn't answer and we went to the first vehicle within range and broke in. Dean hot wired and it and we pulled out. I tried calling Sam, but he didn't answer, so I left him nearly ten angry voice mails and texts before Dean yanked the car to the side of the road and grabbed my phone. He clicked around on it for a few minutes before shaking his head.

"What's wrong?"

"I don't get it-" He answered. "He took off but didn't bother to turn the GPS on his phone off."

"You think it's from his hallucinations?"

"No other reason I can think of as to why he'd climb out a bathroom window and steal a car."

He cranked the car in drive again and fishtailed away from the side of the road.

"Well, where is he?"

"Still on the move-" He handed me back my phone. "Keep your eyes on that thing, he's got about a twenty minute head start on us."

For the next hour it was like a cat and mouse chase. As soon as we thought we were gaining on Sam, he would suddenly take a turn and head in the complete opposite direction, therefore giving himself an even greater distance.

Since I was keeping the GPS on my phone activated, I tried calling Sam with Deans phone, still- There was no answer.

"What the hell is he doing?" I practically shrieked.

"He thinks he's being followed, so he's doin what we would normally do if that happened. Trying to lose whoever it is."

"But is he actually being followed, or is he hallucinating being followed?"

That was the big question here. Did something that actually happen to force Sam to take off, or was he having a major freak out because of what was going on in his head? Judging by his erratic driving I could only think it was from the latter.

After another twenty minutes he finally came to a stop so Dean revved the engine and sped to the location, which looked to be some sort of storage warehouse. The car Sam had stolen was parked out front, the drivers side door was hanging open and the engine was still running.

Dean parked beside it and we darted for the door which was halfway hanging open.

"Sammy?" Dean called out, carefully pushing the door open. "It's us, we're comin in!"

We heard nothing but we stepped inside anyhow. It was partially dark but for a few overhead lights, and the place was sectioned off with ceiling high shelves stacked with car parts.

When we heard a gun-shot, Dean didn't hesitate any longer as we both took off running where it came from. As soon as we rounded one of the shelves we could see Sam standing in the middle of the isle with his pistol drawn and aiming at the wall.

"Shut up!" He screamed, and both Dean and I stared at the blank space he was staring at.

"Sam?" I called out and he swung around quickly, aiming the gun at us.

"Whoa, hold on!" Dean said, raising his hands. "Calm down, Sam- There's no need to go pointing that thing at us!"

"What the hell is happening?!" Sam said, his eyes were wide and panicked as his hands shook. "You were just here, we drove to this place, then you disappeared!"

"Ok, ok-" Dean kept his hands raised as he slowly moved closer. "Just calm down and think about this. We weren't here with you, we've been trying to find you. You took off... Remember?"

Sams brows furrowed, and he kept shifting to glance at whatever he saw opposite of us.

"No... I can't know that for sure-" He shook his head. "I don't know what's real, and what's not."

Yet again he looked to his left and whatever was there.

"Sammy. Look at me." Dean commanded and Sam fumbled slightly. "Look at Lara. We're the ones that are real here."

Sam cringed and grabbed his head turning and firing his gun at the wall.

"Hey!" I shouted. "Sam, stop! Whatever it is you think you're seeing doesn't mean you need to start firing your weapon!"

"Just put it down." Dean coaxed. "Put it away before someone get hurts."

Sam nodded, and with shaking hands lowered the gun to the floor and lied it down. Dean finally let out a relieved sigh and moved over closer after instructing me to stay away. There was no knowing if Sam was going to snap again, and just in case Dean wanted to take the blows... Not me.

"Look, I know that I can't understand what you're goin through, man-" Dean went on. "But look around, think about it. You know whatever he's telling you isn't true. _We_ are real-" He reached over and grabbed his bandaged hand that was still in the process of healing. "Pain is real, feel that?" He squeezed it tightly and Sam grunted from the discomfort. "If you can feel the pain then you know what's real."

Sam cringed as the bandage soaked in blood from his stitches busting open. His eyes kept shifting to the empty area and back to us as he finally began to calm down.

"Ok-" Sam breathed out. "Ok, I know. I see now..." The crazy look in his eyes began to fade. "I'm sorry... It's stopping."

I moved closer and gently took hold of his arm.

"Are you good now?" I asked.

"Y-yeah. I will be."

Dean picked up Sams gun and put it in his own jacket.

"Let's get the hell outa here then-" He started back for the door. "Bobby's waiting for us."

In the time it took for us to track down Sam, the impala was fixed thankfully, so we paid the bill and sped back towards Sioux Falls. By the time we made it back it was just after dark and as soon as we pulled into Bobbys drive, Dean stomped on the breaks.

"Oh no..." He muttered.

I quickly jumped out of the car and ran towards the smoldering remains of Bobbys house.

"Oh god. Bobby?!" I started frantically shouting.

Sam and Dean followed after me and we tried our best to search through the rubble, but we could find nothing. Bobbys car was parked out front, which meant... No- I refused to accept that.

"Bobby!" Dean shouted now as he started running around the property. "Where are you old man, say something!"

But we heard no answer. And after the three of us separated to search through all the parked junkers, we met up again besides Bobbys car as Dean pulled out his phone and dialed.

"Bobby, you better be alive. You better not be in that house, you hear? If you're getting this call me. Let us know you're alive, please."

He hanged up and we all went silent. It would be ignorant to not consider the worst in this situation, but neither of us seemed to be able to spit out the words. We had just lost Cas, and now maybe...

"Let's look around again." Sam said. "He's gotta be around here somewhere."

Dean led the way through the rows of old cars as Sam and I lagged behind. We even went as far as to search under vehicles but of course Bobby wasn't there. Sam and I eventually went in our own directions to cover more ground and even though his junkyard was massive- Something told me it didn't matter. If he was still alive we wouldn't find him there.

After turning down another row of cars I heard voices and suddenly stopped. One was clearly Dean but the other I didn't recognize. So I ducked behind vehicles and slowly inched my way closer until stopping about twenty feet away. As I suspected it was my brother, but the man in front of him wasn't familiar. He seemed to be Latino with dark hair and a goatee.

Judging by Deans expression I could tell whoever this guy was obviously wasn't a "friend". That fact became even more clear when his face suddenly morphed into an enormous mouth loaded with sharp teeth.

Shit. Shit shit. It was a Leviathan and I was completely unarmed.

A hand suddenly clamped over my mouth and I heard a quiet "shh". It was Sammy and he was ducked down beside me.

"Dean took my gun." He whispered, then nudged me. "Take this."

He handed me a tire iron and I could see a piece of a two by four in his own hands.

"On three." He nodded and then started counting.

On three we both sprung up and ran towards the monster, I got one hit on the side of his head before he reached around and grabbed me by the throat and tossed me across the row of cars, I slammed down on the roof of an old pickup and struggled to roll off. I wasn't hurt, so much as the wind was simply knocked out of me. By the time I slid back down to the ground I noticed Dean taking a swing at the man and knocking him backwards. He shouted something to Sammy as a car on a magnetic crane suddenly dropped and crashed on top of him.

I went stiff at the scene, rushing past and practically leaping over cars only to find Dean lying about ten feet away groaning in pain.

"Dean!" I knelt down beside him. "Are you ok?"

"Dammit, no!" He pointed to his leg, and I saw it twisted beyond belief.

"Oh shit, yeah that puppy's broken." I noticed Sam lying a few feet away and he was convulsing, so I pulled my phone and dialed 911.

Sam was in and out of consciousness, and I wasn't sure why. I didn't see any head wounds, and he had only been knocked back a few feet.

"What's goin on?" Dean asked. "Is he ok?"

"I don't know. He's out cold." I conveniently left out that Sam had been convulsing seconds before hand, Dean was hurt and needed to focus on himself.

It was less than ten minutes when an ambulance sped into the drive and they were both loaded onto gurneys. I jumped in with them and within minutes we were speeding down the road.

"What's happening?" Dean garbled. "Is my brother ok?"

The EMT ignored his question and instead looked at me. "Do they have any allergies to medication?"

"No-" I shook my head. "I don't think so."

"Someone tell me what's happening?!" Dean shouted.

"Just calm down, buddy-" He said. "We're getting you to Sioux Falls General."

"Wait-" Both Dean and I began to freak out. "You can't take them there, you have to take them somewhere else. Anywhere else!" I said.

He ignored me as well and slipped an oxygen mask over Deans face and he began to pass out. Sam was still out cold, but started seizing, and I told myself over and over again that it was up to me now to make sure the monsters at that damned hospital didn't friggin eat us!


	58. Chapter 58

After we got to the ER I fought against every nurse or Doctor there, insisting that they let me in the room with my brothers while they worked on them. They of course denied that request, and after a few minutes of my tirades threatened to call security on me. I had no choice but to sit in the waiting room and pray that the doctors they had,_ weren't_ flesh eating Leviathans.

In the hours that I waited I tried calling Bobby nearly fifty times- Still receiving no answer.

This was too much right now- Way too much to take in. Seriously, how much more could we actually take? How much more shit would happen to Sam and Dean? First losing Cas, and now maybe Bobby, Sammy was in the thralls of a complete emotional breakdown and Dean was... Well, he was alive but his leg was busted up beyond belief. How the hell were we gonna fight like this? Yeah, I was still relatively intact but jeez, it was only a matter of time before I cracked up as well. I was seriously beginning to wonder if we were jinxed somehow- It seemed that trouble just loved to torment us.

I had been pacing back and forth practically since the moment my brothers were taken back into the dreaded double doors of no return- It was nearly 2am when finally a dark haired woman in a white lab coat entered the waiting room.

"Smith?" She called out, which was the alias I had given when Sam and Dean were wheeled in.

"Yeah, that's me!" I rushed over and she gave half a smile.

She glanced over their medical files before nodding. "Your oldest brother had a broken leg, as I'm sure you're well aware. He's going to be just fine but he'll be laid up for a couple months."

"And Sam?"

Her brows furrowed. "He's alive, but we're unsure of what's causing his ailments. All signs point to some sort of head trauma, but we've preformed all of the tests needed and can't find one. For the moment he's unconscious, but his vital signs are stable."

I let out a deep breath and nodded. "Ok, can I see them?"

"You can see Dean, but Sam is off limits for the moment since he's still in ICU, and we're sending him upstairs for a ct-scan-" She motioned for me to follow. "This way."

We started for a set of elevators just adjacent to the waiting room, she pushed the button and gave me a smile. "He's on the second floor, room 203."

"Thanks." I muttered, then watched her walk away. For a moment I tried to decide if she had been a monster, but really- There was no way of knowing.

I rode the elevator up alone, thankfully- And when the door opened and I saw the hallway swarming with nurses I tried my best to keep my eyes lowered to the floor and shield my face. The Leviathan knew all of our faces and was probably on the look out. Luckily though no one seemed to pay me any mind and when I came to Deans door I slipped inside quickly and shut it behind me.

He was lying on the bed, his right leg completely surrounded by a thick cast, and but for a few bumps and bruises he seemed to be ok. Completely knocked out, but ok.

I rushed over to him and shook him by the shoulder. "Dean, wake up dude. Wake up."

He mumbled something that sounded more or less like "Whazajabbergirst."

"Yeah that's helpful, bro-" I shook him again. "Dean, wakey wakey. We need to get the hell outa here."

He didn't budge and I let out a sigh. He was hocked up on so many painkillers I could douse him in ice water and wave a fresh pie under his nose and he still wouldn't wake up. And Sam was who the hell knows where. Unfortunately I didn't have a choice but to sit down beside his bed and wait for him to stir, because I sure as hell couldn't lug both their knocked out bodies out of this damned hospital by myself.

I must have dozed off because when I felt the bed shift I snorted awake to see that Dean was wriggling under the blankets as his eyes finally opened.

"It's about damn time." I said, standing. "How's the leg there, champ?"

"Champ?" Dean said, already confused.

"It felt like a champ moment, or would you prefer tiger, or sport?-" I shrugged and he scowled. "Ok, so here's the deal..."

"Where's Sammy?" He interrupted, forcing himself to sit up.

"I don't know, the doctor said something about a ct-scan-" I glanced at the clock on the wall. "And apparently I fell asleep for the last three hours."

He tried to swing himself off the bed, successfully ramming me with his casted leg.

"How the hell am I supposed to get around with this thing?" He pointed to the cast. "I might as well have a peg-leg."

I had no answer and when the door opened and a man with a dark blue suit entered- It took me a good fifteen seconds to realize that it was Bobby.

"Bobby?" Deans eyes were wide. "You're alive?"

"Apparently so-" He rushed over after grabbing a pair of crutches that were leaning against the wall. "Where's Sam?"

"I don't know. The last I heard he was getting a brain scan." I answered.

He nodded and handed the crutches to Dean along with a pair of clothes and a beanie, and me a baseball cap. "Ok, you two idgits meet me downstairs at the ambulance dock- I'll get Sam, and be quick about it. There's Leviathans crawlin all over this place. Wear the hats, try to disguise yourself a little bit, huh?"

He was out the door within seconds and I closed the curtain while Dean changed into his clothes. Once he was done I tucked my hair up underneath my hat and buttoned up my jacket- Not exactly a very flattering look but it would do for the moment. Of course I would have rather had a full blown on costume to hide from the chompers here, but- I didn't exactly have that option. Dean didn't seem to want to wear the beanie so I forcefully shoved it over his head to cover his hair.

"Time to go." I said, helping him hobble to the door on crutches.

"Nice hat-" He said sarcastically. "You look like a twelve year old boy."

"Shut up. And you look like a grungy hacky sack guy."

We left his room and started down the hall, albeit slowly, but at least we were moving. Of course we both kept our heads down- Which I'm sure only made us appear all the more suspicious, but for the moment no one seemed to pay attention. But, it was only a matter of time before someone discovered Dean no longer lying in his bed.

It felt like forever getting to the elevators and once we were inside, alone thank god, and on the way down to the first floor- I let out a relieved sigh.

"Ok, so should we get jumped-" Dean said. "You whack them with my crutches and get the hell out, got it?"

"What about you?"

"Don't worry about me, I'll just slow ya down."

"You're an idiot-" I rolled my eyes. "Haven't you learned by now that I'm not gonna ditch you and leave you behind?"

He couldn't argue because the elevator doors dinged open and I stepped out first. The way was partially clear so I nodded for him to follow and he hobbled out slowly. I was starting to get the heebie-jeebies even more than I already had, and I tried to coax Dean into quickening his pace. By the time we reached the back of the hospital where Bobby told us to meet him I could hear voices at the end of the hall growing closer.

"Hurry it up, dude-" I said. "I think they made us."

"Dammit-" Dean glanced over his shoulder and barely spotted two nurses staring at us and pointing. "Yep, definitely made us. Hurry to the door, cupcake."

I got there first and pushed it open and allowed Dean to move outside, after he was clear I pulled the door closed and shoved the first thing available in front of it, which just so happened to be a broken gurney. No, it wouldn't hold for very long but it was better than nothing.

Dean took off across the drive towards an ambulance which engine was running. I could see Bobby in the drivers seat waving us over. I followed suit and was halfway there when something in the distance caught my attention.

I hadn't even realized that I'd stopped moving, that I was basically a sitting duck for two Leviathans that were charging their way from the hospital, no- The only thing I could do was stare across the drive to a grassy hillside where a tall tree stood. It wasn't that that had my gazes transfixed, it was who I thought was standing under the shade of that tree.

Time seemed to move in slow motion, and if I wasn't certain I was completely wrong, if I wasn't certain that it was my eyes playing tricks on me- I would say it was Castiel. His face was snow white, his lips purple- Just as in my nightmare. In a flash just as quickly as I spotted him he was gone and I heard shouting from the ambulance.

"Lara!" Dean screamed. "Lara move your ass, now!"

Finally I snapped out of it as time seemed to return to normal, I darted for the ambulance and dove in the passenger side door and Bobby floored the gas. The tires squealed as we sped away from the hospital, leaving the two Leviathans behind.

I crawled into the back where Sammy was lying unconscious on a gurney. I tapped his cheek a few times and he started to grumble- So at least I knew he was slightly coherent.

"What the hell was that back there?" Dean snapped at me from over his shoulder. "Why did you stop?"

"What?" Honestly my mind was still spinning from what I thought I just saw.

"You heard me-" He shifted in his seat. "You stopped, you looked like you saw a ghost- What the hell did you see?"

"I don't know... Nothing I guess, it was just my imagination."

"Yeah cause that's just so believable." Bobby rolled his eyes.

Sammy started to stir and grumble even more as his eyes barely opened. "Lara?" He murmured.

"Yeah, bud-" I smiled. "We're to the rescue again."

"Ugh, where are we?"

"Headin to some place safe." Bobby answered. "Just sit tight and get some rest, kid."

Sam didn't want to listen to that as he tried to sit up, but I held my hand against his chest.

"Not-uh. You heard the man. You're resting."

"What happened? All I remember is being tossed backwards by that Leviathan?" He asked.

Dean leaned over again. "You got off easy, buttercup- Me on the other hand, got a busted leg."

Sam fell back onto his pillow and let out a few deep breaths before drifting off again- And I settled in for a long drive.

* * *

We stopped after about an hour of driving where Bobby left his car, and after climbing into that we took off a second time.

Sam was conscious now and seeming to be in pretty good shape as he crammed into the backseat with me. And after questioning Bobby nearly twenty times he finally told us we were heading to Rufus' old cabin in Montana. It was a long drive, one that for some reason or another- Was quiet and awkward. Sam seemed lost in his own thoughts, Bobby as well- While Deans face was that of annoyance. He was clearly pissed, only- I just didn't know what about. Although, considering our situation as of late I suppose I could understand. I mean, Bobbys house got burned down and Leviathans were wanting to feast on our innards, so yeah- Sure, I guess he had reason to be pissed- Not to mention that his leg was broken which meant he couldn't fight even if he wanted to- Combine that with Sams broken wall and hallucinations, and Cas being gone, well... I was surprised that he was holding up as well as he was.

In the next three weeks that went by Dean was the grumpiest patient I had ever had to deal with. He spent the majority of the time lounged on the sofa with his leg propped up bitching and complaining about everything around him. Sam kept his nose buried in his laptop trying to find anything he could on Leviathans since nearly a week ago Bobby claimed that the ones running Sioux Falls General had disappeared. Myself, I was... Well I was playing Mommy of the cabin and taking care of the boys. As far as my own bit of hallucinating went- It was just a one time thing so far, thankfully. But that didn't make it any less traumatizing.

"Lara-" Dean whined from the sofa for the umpteenth time today. "I'm hungry."

I grumbled and Sam snickered at me from over his laptop.

"We have canned chili and pork 'n' beans. What's it gonna be?" I replied.

"That's it?" He turned as well as he could with his leg propped up. "We don't have anything else?"

"Nope."

"No more pie?"

"You ate the rest of the pie for breakfast."

He frowned. "What is this prison?"

"Hey-" I shrugged. "Bobby is supposed to be here in a couple hours with more supplies, so I think you can wait until then, right?"

He grumbled and turned back to watch tv, which was some spanish soap opera. After an hour he dozed off and Sam fidgeted from his seat and nudged me with his foot.

When I looked at him he mouthed something to me, which I didn't get- So he tried again.

"Dude, just say it." I said.

He rolled his eyes and motioned towards the door. "Outside." He whispered.

Alrighty, if he wanted to play secrets then I guess I would go with it, so we quietly sneaked our way out the front door, and once he closed it behind us he peaked in one of the windows to make sure Dean hadn't woken up.

"What's up?" I asked.

"I think I found a case-" He said, still peering inside the windows. "Something only a couple hours drive from here."

"Ok?" I shook my head. "And why is that a big secret?"

"Uh- Because Dean is laid up? He can't exactly hunt right now, which means that leaves us."

"So you want me to ditch our invalid brother and go with you to hunt?"

He glared at me with his usual bitch face. "No, but someone's gotta take care of it- And Bobby's not here. I'll go."

I crossed my arms and glared at him, going silent. Dean and I had the uncanny knack of speaking with only certain looks but apparently Sam wasn't privy to that ability.

"What?" He shrugged. "Why do you look like you wanna tare my face off?"

"Because you're not going out there alone, dumb-ass. I don't want to hurt your feelings but what if you have another freak out while you're gone?"

He snickered. "Lara, I've been fine. Yeah, I have a little-" He waved his hand in circles trying to pull an explanation out of the air. "I've been seeing things, yeah I get that- But, I know now what's real and what isn't. I can handle it."

For the moment I wasn't going to scream at him. "So what's the job?"

"Bodies turning up, ones that had been dead for weeks- But, shortly before their bodies were discovered these dead people somehow walked straight into a bank, a liquor store, or where ever else might be worth robbing and held up the places."

"Dead people robbing places?" I cringed. "Don't you think their gooey corpses would have caused a little attention?"

He gave me another eye roll. "No, Lara. I watched the surveillance videos... The suspects eyes were glowing."

"Ew-" I shuddered. "A shifter?"

I hated shifters, with their freaky shedding slimy skin and being able to look like whoever the hell they wanted to. They creeped me out more than any other monster out there.

"Yeah that's what I'm thinkin-" He leaned against the door. "Which means someone's gotta take care of it. Dean can't, Bobby can't- Which leaves me."

"Still, Sam..." I tried to argue but he stood tall and towered over me.

"Lara. Comon, you know you can trust me. I'm not stupid, and I'm definitely not new to this kinda thing. Before you came back I hunted on my own for an entire year."

"But, you didn't have your soul then, Sammy. It was a little different."

His eyes fell up to the sky and he sighed in annoyance. "Look, if we sit back and do nothing then more people are gonna die. Now, I can go out there and I can stop it, and you have my back, or I could go out there and do it anyways and be pissed at you- So what's it gonna be?"

I scowled bitterly. "Seriously? What was even the point of you're telling me if you just wanna go out and do it? It's not like I can stop you, you're like the friggin jolly green giant."

"Because you haven't been sleeping and I couldn't exactly sneak out. So, I thought I'd just be honest with you. You wanna tell me why you haven't been sleeping?" He arched his brows. "Since we're being _honest _with each other right now."

I snorted out a laugh. "Hey this is your gig not mine. Don't drag me into it. Why are you so gung-ho about doing this? You're taking it personally, so... If you want me to not pitch a fit and go in there and wake Dean up, tell me why you really wanna go?"

He shifted on his feet, brushing his hair out of his eyes. "Ok... I'll tell you, but- You can't tell Dean, got it?"

"Possibly. Depends on what you're gonna tell me."

"I lied. It's not a shifter case, it's... Something else. It was a long time ago, back when I was just a kid. We were on a job and long story short- This girl saved my life."

I felt my lips purse. "Ok, and I take it this girl isn't a _normal _girl?"

"No-" He sighed. "She's a kitsune, and I know what you're thinking. She's a monster, monsters need to be taken out, I get that- But it's different this time. So what I'm asking is if you'll just sit back and lay low, keep Dean outa the loop and let me go take care of this?"

I found it much simpler to not immediately agree to it if I didn't look at that sad puppy face.

"Is she dropping bodies?" I asked now.

"If it's her, which I'm pretty sure it is... Yeah. Please don't freak out on me, and let me take care of it? Ok?"

This situation was ironically amusing- Not amusing as though I wanted to laugh and joke around, but that he was basically asking me permission to go out and do something. Sam was a grown man, hell he was older than me, so why would he feel the need to actually get my approval? Yeah, I knew why- It's because Dean definitely wouldn't. If he heard about it he would of course want to gank the monster first, and screw asking questions _ever_.

"Can I really stop you?" I answered. "But, I actually wish you hadn't of told me the truth- That way when Dean wakes up and asks me where the hell you are I won't have to lie."

I hated lying to Dean, it made me feel like the lowest human being on the face of the earth. He could give you this look of disappointment that would make you want to cut your heart out. Whether it was a look he had mastered on purpose or if he actually did feel betrayed, I don't know. But, I had lied to Dean in the past, back so long ago when I forced Cas to keep my secret- And it just ate at me and ate at me until I was about to go friggin insane.

"Just tell him I went on a job, you don't have to go into any details."

Now I actually did laugh. "Yeah and that'll go over really well. You know that he'll figure it out on his own, right?"

"Which is why I don't have much time to get a head start. So, are you cool with it?"

I threw my arms up in the air. "What other choice do I have? I hate when you guys put me in these situations- Making me choose between the two of you." I nodded. "Alright, fine. Go, but oh my god you are going to owe me _big_."

He gave half a smile and didn't bother going back inside, instead he headed straight for the impala climbed in the drivers seat and took off.

I waited a good five minutes before returning inside- Dean was still passed out on the sofa so I sat down in front of Sams laptop- Noticing that he had cleared all browsing history and anything else that might give Dean a lead on where he ran off too. Yeah, he had been planning this for a couple hours at least. Ugh... Dean was going to rip me a new one. I just knew it.

Thanks to Deans pain meds when he would pass out he would stay out for several hours, so I eventually fell asleep in the armchair beside the sofa and I only awoke when I felt Dean poke me roughly in the ribcage with the end of one of his crutches.

"Wake up, sunshine." He said, and my eyes shot open.

He was halfway hanging off of the couch, holding himself up by his hand resting on the floor as he poked at me with the other.

"I'm awake." I garbled.

"Bobby show up with the grub yet?"

I peered over my shoulder to the empty table. "Apparently not."

"Dammit. I'm about to chew my own leg off just to get somethin in my stomach... Where's Sam?"

For a moment I went stiff, but tried to play it off as having slept in that uncomfortable chair.

"He's not here?" I asked.

"Uh, no- Do you see him anywhere around?"

I glanced around the cabin, then shrugged. "No, guess not. Did you try calling him? Maybe he went out for food?"

Thankfully we were interrupted when Bobby stepped into the cabin. He was holding two plastic bags filled with groceries, and the clanking of beer bottles inside seemed to perk Dean up.

"Finally-" He lugged himself off the couch with the help of his crutches. "What ya got, Bobby?"

"What was on your list, idgit-" He started pulling random items from the bag. "So how ya holdin up?"

"Same as usual- But this damn cast is driving me crazy. I swear, if I have to live with it another week I'm gonna blow a gasket."

"Technically you're supposed to have it on for a couple months, but- Since you don't really listen to doctors orders, I suppose another week will do." I said, taking the fixings for sandwiches over to the cabinet. "Just chill out for another week, then you're golden."

"Easy for you to say-" Dean huffed. "So, seriously- Where the hell is Sam?"

"Car's gone." Bobby commented. "Maybe he drove into town."

Dean glared at me. "Lara? Where is he?"

"Why do you automatically assume that I know his every move?" I protested.

"Because you do. He tells you more shit than he tells me, so spill it- Where is he?"

Now Bobby was glaring at me, and normally I would turn to Sam for backup but seeing is that it was _him _that put me in this situation, I only wanted to punch him in the neck.

"He said he found a job, that's all I know." I finally answered.

"A job?" Yep, there it was, Deans famous look. "And you were gonna tell me about this when?"

"_Now_?" I shrugged, smirking awkwardly.

"Don't get cute with me, sister- Now what kinda job?"

"I don't know!"

"Yes you do!" He scowled. "You forget that you and me-" He pointed to himself than at me and I rolled my eyes. "Have the same tells. I can tell when you're lying, just as you can tell when I am, now answer me. What job?"

"The only thing he told me was that it was somethin you guys did back when he was a kid. A kitsune or something. I don't know any of the details or even where he's going. I guess he knew better than to tell me too much because he knew you'd crack me."

He was taken aback for a moment and actually looked confused.

"A kitsune?" Now he sat down at the table and started clicking around on Sams laptop, noticing how everything had been erased, his anger filled eyes shifted to me. "Did you do this?"

"No. Sam did it before he left I guess."

"Friggin awesome. I'm gonna kick his ass."

I tried to make him a sandwich as a peace offering but he took little interest in it, that is until he smelled the bacon. He ate more than half before I sat down and cracked open a beer.

"So how are you gonna track him down? Do you know what to look for?"

"I know what to look for when tracking a kitsune. Missing pituitary glands in the victims." He glanced at Bobby. "Did you happen to grab a paper?"

"Do I look like a paper boy to you?" Bobby retorted.

"Ok, jeez. Touchy touchy." Dean clicked around some more before sitting back and shaking his head. "Ice pick killer. Wow, that's a blast from the past."

"Sam was right then? It's the same person?" I asked.

"Seems like it."

"And do you know how to track them down?"

He smirked slightly and motioned towards his leg. "Yeah, as soon as I get this damned cast off... Anyone got a saw?"


	59. Chapter 59

I stared at Dean as he drove, glancing down at his leg which cast was now gone.

"You know you're gonna completely fuck up your leg, right?" I asked. "It's never going to heal correctly."

"Please-" He rolled his eyes. "I'm fine. It's not the first broken bone I've had."

He pressed on the gas and yet again was speeding. We had been driving for an hour, and wherever Sam had run off too apparently he lied about. He told me it was only a couple hours from the cabin, but instead it was more like an entire days drive.

"So, you still pissed at me?" I asked.

"I'm not pissed," He shrugged nonchalantly. "But I'm not happy either."

"Seriously, Dean- Did you really think I could physically stop him? He's got like ten inches and a million pounds on me."

"You could have woke me up." He retorted.

"Yeah, and you know what would have happened after that? Sam would have broken your other leg and took off anyways. And we'd be in the same situation."

He ignored my comment. "Try calling him again."

I know Dean was worried, and really- So was I. It's not as though Sam was completely coherent on most days. Yeah he seemed to be handling his hallucinations better than he had in the past, but it was still the thought of him having a freak out that had Dean and I on edge. We never knew when he might snap again, or what he might do if that happened. He could disappear, he could go so crazy he might physically harm himself. We just didn't know what the next step would be.

Since we had left the cabin I had tried calling Sam nearly ten times, so I was surprised when he actually picked up this time around.

"Hey, Lara." He said.

"Where are you?"

"Ahead of you still, apparently. How much time do I got?"

I glanced to Dean and he arched a brow at me. "Uh, well- Dean is speeding, but you have a few hours head start, so..."

"Can you try to stall him somehow?"

My jaw clenched. "Seriously?"

"Please?"

He was lucky I couldn't reach through the phone and throttle him. "And how, pray tell, do you suggest I do that?"

"Do what?" Dean cinched his mouth. "He wants you to stall me, doesn't he?"

Sam sighed deeply. "Put me on speaker, kiddo."

I did as he asked and held the phone up in the air. "Ok, go."

"Dean-" He said. "Look, I know you're pissed but I need you to give me the benefit of the doubt here. Let me handle this, you don't have to come."

"You stole my car!" Dean snapped. "And you tried to get Lara to lie to me about where you went, not cool, man- Not cool. Ya know, you could have just been honest with me!"

"You're right. Ok, so... Just give me a few hours, if you don't hear from me then you can do what you gotta do."

Deans face was twisted in annoyance. "We're about four hours out, so- You have that long."

Sam hanged up shortly after and I stuffed my phone back in my pocket.

"That went well." I said sarcastically.

Dean went silent and we drove for another hour before pulling off in a small town. He parked in front of a diner and nudged me.

"Food." He said, then hobbled out with a pronounced limp.

I shook my head, hoping that we wouldn't get into a situation that involved fighting, because his leg clearly wasn't ready to be taken out of that cast.

I followed him inside and we took a seat at a corner booth. Within seconds a waitress approached.

"What can I get you?" She smiled.

"Well I don't know about you-" Dean smirked at me. "But I would kill for a piece of pie."

"A la mode?" The woman snickered.

"Oh god yes." He replied.

She jotted it down and then looked to me. "What about you, sweetie?"

"I'll have the same, with a coke."

We watched her return to the kitchen and Dean sat back with a sigh.

"I'm surprised we're actually stopping, what happened to finding Sam and kicking the crap out of him?" I asked.

He leaned forward with his elbows on the table and shrugged. "He's not getting that far ahead of us- Trust me, sister. I know what I'm doing."

Oh yeah, he definitely did- And he was planning something clearly. He wouldn't have let Sam go off on his own like this if he didn't already know what he was going to do.

"I don't suppose you're going to fill me in on..." My words cut off when I just barely glanced outside.

Oh no... No no no no. Not again. Why was this happening? Why did I keep seeing him? Was my mind deciding to break down? Or was it just being incredibly cruel to me?

It was Cas again, standing across the street. It was one thing to see him, but why did I have to see him like _that_? Pale and clearly not alive, with purple lips and a devoid expression.

"Dean..." I refused to take my eyes off of him. I didn't even blink. "Look out the window. Do you see that?"

He shifted and looked out the window his eyes were darting everywhere. "What? I don't see anything?"

My heart started racing, my stomach was rolling. It felt like minutes on end that I didn't blink and refused to look away. His lips started to move, he was clearly speaking but of course I couldn't hear or make out what he was trying to say.

"You seriously don't see him?" I was beginning to panic.

"See who? What the hell, Lara? You're freakin me out."

Instinct was telling me to get up and run out there, but I was frozen in my seat. I couldn't budge. When a semi suddenly rolled by and broke the eye contact we had made, naturally he was gone once the truck had passed. Afterwards I leaned back against the booth and finally managed to breathe.

"Hey," He reached across and tugged on my hand. "What did you see?"

"I think Sams hallucinations are contagious." I said, not meaning for it to be a joke.

"What? Did you see Lucifer?"

I shook my head. "No. Cas... It was Cas."

His face went blank and he said nothing, but darted up from the booth and ran outside. I watched him run around the block like a chicken with its head cut off before he stopped across the street where I had seen Cas. He had his knife in his hand, but obviously he wouldn't see anything- Because it was clear to me now that Cas hadn't really been there. It was just my evil bitch of a mind that hated my guts. He finally crossed the street and came back inside, sliding back into his seat just in time as our pie was laid out in front of us. He waited for the waitress to leave before he leaned forward.

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"Sure? Well I'm sure I was hallucinating, yes."

"How many times has this happened?"

"Only twice."

He tapped his fingertips on the table and shook his head. "Do you think it could have really been him?"

"No-" I was adamant about that. "He didn't look normal."

"How so?"

"Because he looked dead. White skin, purple lips."

He arched a brow now. "So, like a ghost? Can an angel even become a ghost?"

"I highly doubt that. It's just me, Dean. I dunno, maybe I'm not handling this as well as I thought."

"If this happens again-" He knocked his knuckle on the table to get my attention. "You tell me, got it?"

What would be the point in that? It's not like he could stop it. I didn't even understand why it was happening, it made no sense. I understood now what Sam was going through, at least a little bit. Although his hallucinations were much more bloody and full of Satan. In a way I felt sorry for Dean, because now he had two siblings to contend with that were losing their minds.

* * *

Everything about this situation was wrong- And no matter how much he tried to tell himself that this was quite possibly the best place he could be, his mind just couldn't wrap around that. It felt like a lie, he was lying to himself. The more he tried to pound it into his head that this was his life now, it just wouldn't sink in.

She was a kind woman, and had taken care of him since the moment she found him lying on the river banks- But there was something about her as well that just felt _wrong_.

He had no recollection of who he was, no memories at all of who he might have been in the past- The only thing he knew for certain was he was far from normal. He only realized that shortly after Daphne had brought him back to her home. She had tumbled down the stairs and broke her wrist and after a quick touch she was miraculously healed. It was after that that he had the compelling urge to help people, which is what he had been doing during the month he had been there.

But, of course having no name was proving to be a nuisance, and it didn't seem his memory was going to be coming back any time soon. Daphne suggested choosing one, which is what he did. It took hours of searching through a baby names website before he came across one that appealed to him. Emmanuel meant "God is with us" which for one reason or another drew him in. So that's what he called himself now.

It was a nice name, and seemingly fitting for one reason or another- But, it was _not_ his name- So whenever someone would call him by it it shot an uncomfortable feeling up his spine. It was wrong, just as everything about this entire situation was wrong.

It didn't help matters that he kept hearing a voice- A voice that would appear from out of no where and fade nearly as quickly. He could never understand the words, all he knew was that it was a female. All of these strange occurrences combined with not eating, drinking or sleeping was enough to drive him crazy. He felt empty inside, as though there was something missing that had been torn from him- And he tried to fill that void with anything he could find. Preforming so called miracles for the sick, or the blind, helping people that were lost and afraid.

It didn't help. That horrible emptiness only seemed to grow.

* * *

When we pulled into town the first thing Dean did was track down his baby, which was parked outside a motel. It was simple enough to track Sam down, and when we stopped in front of the door to his room we could tell instantly that he wasn't inside- Which meant that he had gone to hunt this kitsune on foot. Dean picked the lock and we stepped inside, waiting in the darkness for Sam to return.

It took hours to get here, and I hadn't spoken to Sam since earlier that morning. Naturally I was beginning to freak out, but Dean didn't seem to be worried.

I didn't much care for sitting there on the bed smothered in darkness, it was unsettling- Especially since my mind was playing horrible tricks on me. I was never this jumpy, normally I could keep my cool, after all it was needed with our lifestyle. But it was a little different seeing ghosts of people I didn't know or care about. Not that I believed Cas was a ghost now- But really, I wasn't sure what I wanted to believe anymore.

This was clearly something I shouldn't be thinking about, I was reading too much into it. So, instead I watched Dean as he paced in front of the door.

It wasn't long before we heard footsteps approaching, as a key was slipped into the lock- As soon as it opened Sam was met with a punch to the jaw which sent him flying backwards into a set of bushes.

"Holy crap." I jumped to my feet, honestly not expecting Dean to actually hit him.

"Dude..." Sam grumbled as he pulled himself to his feet. "What the hell was that?"

"That's for taking my friggin car!" Dean snapped back.

"Ok, I'm sorry!" Sam rubbed his face and stepped into the room.

"So what happened?" I asked. "Ya know, with the girl?"

Dean as well seemed to want to know the answer to that question.

"It's taken care of-" Sam answered. "You don't have to worry about it anymore."

"Taken care of?" Dean crossed his arms. "Naturally that means, you _killed _her, right? Because she's left four bodies so far, and there's no telling how many more will come after?" Sam went silent, his lips pressed into a thin line. "Oh, so you _didn't _kill her? Which means there's still a brain eating monster out there? Wow, why am I not surprised?"

"I can explain-" Sam shook his head. "It's not what you think. She wasn't killing because she wanted to. She has a son, he was sick, and the only thing to cure him was..."

"Fresh meat? So, uh, what was he eating beforehand?" I cringed.

"She's a mortician." He answered and I cringed even more. "Yeah, I know... Kinda gross- But it's kept her from killing all these years."

"Until now." Dean rolled his eyes. "Lemme guess. She batted her eyes at you, spouted some crap about how she wasn't dangerous and you actually fell for it? She's a monster Sam, which means she'll kill again!"

"No, she won't. She gave me her word and I believe her. She's done, Dean. That last victim _was _the _last _victim. Look, you don't have to trust her, but you have to trust me on this. I wouldn't have let her walk away if I thought she was dangerous."

Dean went silent for a moment before turning and looking at me. "What do you think?"

Huh? He was actually asking my opinion? Ok, well that's a first. Normally if Sammy was up to something shady he wouldn't bother.

"Well-" I shrugged. "I _do _trust Sam. He's not stupid, he wouldn't let some monster go if he really felt she was dangerous."

His eyebrow twitched as his lips pursed. I knew that look- He thought we were both full of horse crap.

"Ok." He relented, and Sam and I both looked equally surprised. "If you say she's good. Then she's good."

No, no. That was way too easy. Dean was all about ganking monsters and not believing sob stories. After all, we had encountered several in the past that claimed they weren't evil, but it didn't matter. As far as my oldest brother was concerned, if they had killed once, they would again which meant they were deserving of a quick beheading- Or stabbing, or whatever means it took to actually kill them. Something fishy was going on here, and I couldn't figure out what.

But, apparently Sam didn't notice it- He just seemed happy that Dean was actually willing to let something go for once. He offered to buy our dinner, which perked me up instantly. Since the moment in the diner a few hours ago I hadn't much of an appetite, and I didn't bother with my pie. Not after what I had seen across the street.

On our way to the nearest restaurant Dean mumbled something about needing a refill on his prescriptions. So, he dropped us off and told us to order without him and he'd be back in no time. Sam was none the wiser but I got a bad feeling. Mainly because I had seen Deans pill bottle that morning and it was more than half full. So, unless he had suddenly chugged all of his painkillers, yeah you get it. The dude was lying. Ya know, sometimes, just _sometimes_, I would have liked it if I wasn't so observant- And for once I would like it if I couldn't read Deans facial expressions like a damned book. At least it wouldn't get me in trouble.

But, those suspicions faded after Sammy and I had been sitting at the table for less than twenty minutes and Dean strolled in happily shaking his full bottle of painkillers. Ok, twenty minutes- Clearly I was mistaken. He was acting as normal as ever, ordering a cheeseburger and fries, and Sam his salad. For a few bliss filled minutes at least I sat across from both my idiot brothers and couldn't help but crack a smile. Yeah, things sucked ass the majority of the time- We were always in danger or running from something that wanted to eat us, but... Honestly, I would have rather taken all of that danger if it meant I could stay with them- Because being alone sure as hell was not pleasant. But even though I was happy with my brothers I couldn't deny that there was an emptiness inside me that just seemed to be growing and growing, and nothing I could do would make it go away.


	60. Chapter 60

I sat with perfectly straight posture in the plush leather armchair, the man in front of me was examining the carefully written resume that Sam had printed up. He arched his brows a few times and I knew he was glancing over the several ridiculous claims that Dean had added. I worked for the Governor of Georgia, I spent three years in England for an unnamed but seemingly "royal" family. Basically every ounce of crap Dean could type in there, he did- And I knew that there should be no way this guy could fall for this.

"This is quite the resume." He said, smiling. "So, now that I've looked this over, what can you tell me about yourself? Something that isn't completely made up?"

I smirked, crossing one leg over the other. Ya know, sometimes it was hard not to feel like a high priced call girl in one of these ridiculous get ups. But, the boys thought it was necessary, after all this millionaire was known for his philandering ways. So I discreetly tugged the skirt of my dress up an inch or so. God I hated this...

"Yeah, about that-" I said with an innocent smile. "My Mother, she, uh... Well she gets it into her head that you have to lie on these things. But, there is some truth there, Sir. I did graduate with honors."

He snickered, sitting back and pulling his reading glasses from the end of his nose.

"I like you-" He said, pointing his glasses at me. "I think you could fit in pretty good with the rest of the staff. But, you do need to understand one thing- Everyone likes to keep to themselves, and as long as you stick with what you're ordered, there shouldn't be any problems."

I nodded, glancing at the double doors that showed the perfect view of the backyard and pool. My eyes widened slightly when I saw Dean walk by with a leaf blower, he stopped long enough to wink at me and then kept on going.

"I understand, Sir." I said, taring my eyes away. "And, the party is how soon?"

"In three days, which means we are going to be busy busy busy. It isn't everyday that we have such an important visitor."

Yeah, no kidding, seeing is that this visitor was rumored to be a friggin vampire. Actually it was more than just a rumor, apparently Dean and Sam had tangled with him once in the past- He was the one, and _only _one, that got away. And they didn't take kindly to that, which meant once Dean got wind of him being in Atlanta, naturally he wanted to do whatever it took to chop his head off.

"Can I ask what it would be that you'd like me to do? I was told it had something to do with the kitchen staff?"

He stood from his desk. "Well, we filled that position this morning- A nice young man with exceptional reviews. We're actually in desperate need for someone to clean the guest rooms."

I tried not to scowl. Dean had promised it would not be a maids job! I swear to god if I had to wear a uniform...

"And, we'll need you to wear the uniform." He walked across the room and my fingernails dug into the arm of the chair. "Don't worry, it's nothing too bad. We just want you to blend in, and also once the big night comes, we'll need you to serve the beverages with the other girls. How's that, Emilia?"

I nodded, and stood as well taking the black button up shirt and trousers. I knew I would look like the greeter at the local Apple-Bees, but at least it wasn't a dress.

"That's fine. It won't be a problem and I promise you won't regret hiring me." I flashed a grin which he gawked at. "When do I start?"

"Right now." He pointed to the restroom just outside of his office. "You can change in there, you'll find the supply closet just past the kitchen which you passed on your way here. You think you can manage finding your way around? I have so much to do."

"Of course, it's no problem."

He lightly tapped me on the shoulder. "Welcome to the team, Emilia- I have a feeling you're going to fit right in around here."

I watched him leave the office and descend the hall and I made a quick b-line for the bathroom. As I passed the kitchen my feet skidded to a stop.

Their new co-chef was surprisingly gigantic, and I recognized that posture instantly.

"Sam." I whispered, and he turned slightly, I waved him over.

"Yeah, hey, kiddo. I guess you got hired, huh?" He asked.

"What the hell is this?" I pointed towards the kitchen. "I was supposed to get the kitchen job, seriously. What the hell?"

"What's wrong with what you're doing?" He chuckled.

"I have issues with germs, ok? And you didn't tell me that the entire house is crawling with vampires."

He shrugged. "Didn't Dean mention that?" I glared at him in answer and his face went flat. "Uh, I guess not. Look, it's cool. Nothing is gonna happen because there can't be any outbursts. Besides..." He jabbed me sarcastically on the arm. "You know what you're doing, you still got your knife?"

I nodded. "Of course."

"Then you're ok." He smiled. "People have been disappearing, all signs point to here. Now, either they're already dead, already turned, or are being stashed for hors d'oeuvres later. We gotta find em, so you know what to do."

Sighing, I held my uniform to my chest.

"Hey, Rapunzel!" A man in the kitchen shouted, he stomped over and shoved a hair net in Sams hands. "You know damn well you're supposed to wear that. No hair in the food!"

He stomped his way back into the kitchen and when Sam turned back to face me I was grinning.

"Hey, so- Get back to work, _Rapunzel_." I said.

"Yeah you too. Have fun cleaning the toilets." He shoved the hairnet over his head and smirked his way back to the kitchen.

This was quite possibly the strangest job we had ever taken. Yeah, we'd done some crazy things before but actually getting ourselves hired at a millionaires mansion who happened to be a vampire? Completely nuts. But, Sam was right. Five people had gone missing and there was practically a trail of breadcrumbs leading straight to this house. So, I changed into my uniform and got to work.

The first thing I did was search around the massive house until finding my way to the stairs which led to the basements. Vampire lair usually meant there would be some kind of dungeon underground where they would keep their victims. When I finally found a door that led down instead of up, I noticed the stairs were steep and brick. It was dark as all hell down past the door, so I pulled a small flashlight that I hid in my pocket free. After a quick flick I saw the stairs spiraled down, so I carefully stepped halfway through the doorway.

I highly doubted there would be anything down these steps- The door hadn't even been locked and there was a slew of new employees running around that could easily discover a dungeon full of bleeding victims. But, I knew Dean would grill me after the day was over so I kept going.

The basement was made into a wine cellar, which was stacked from floor to ceiling with bottles. I couldn't risk flicking on a light so made do with my flashlight and walked through the rows and rows of wine.

Something was strange about this cellar, mainly because it was so humid and sticky. I didn't know much about wine but what I did know was that it didn't keep well in such a hot temperature. Automatically I assumed it was a front for something else, something hidden behind the walls and shelves. So, I started feeling around as best as I could in the darkness. When I suddenly felt a gust of wind against my palm, I moved my flashlight closer, noticing a niche in the wall. I was right, there was something hidden back there, possibly another room- But I didn't get the chance to investigate when I heard voices upstairs.

If I was caught down here no kidding I'd be screwed, so I flew back up the stairs and closed the door behind me- Making it halfway down the hallway when I ran into another maid. She paid me no mind as I moved past her and didn't bother going to "work". As far as I was concerned we got what we came for, and I was incredibly uneasy in this house. This was the stupidest thing we had ever done and I had a feeling we were going to end up getting our asses kicked. I was overwhelmed and felt trapped, a feeling you get when you know something terrible's about to go down. So I made my way out a side door and wove around tables and chairs being set up until I found Dean pretending to pull weeds. Beside him was a pile of tulips and it should have been completely obvious that he didn't know what he was doing.

"Dean..." I grabbed his arm. "We need to leave."

"Why, did you find something?"

"Maybe, but- We just need to leave. Trust me."

He furrowed his brows. "What about the missing people?"

"Don't ask me how I know, but I just have a feeling they're dead. And we need to get out of here." He was going to object but I jerked on his arm roughly. "Dean, I'm serious. Now, when something like this happens with you and you make it known, we don't question you. I would appreciate the same treatment."

He sighed and pulled his phone from his overalls then called Sam.

"Find a door, we're leaving." He said, hanged up, then nodded. "Ok, let's go."

We tried not to be noticed as we left the property and Sam finally caught up with us at the impala which was parked about three blocks away. We climbed in and took off heading back towards the motel on the other end of town.

"Ok, start talkin-" Dean said, glaring at me from the rear view mirror. "Why were you so antsy about..."

Suddenly a massive explosion at the end of the street forced Dean to slam on the breaks. We each piled out of the car to see the house completely engulfed in flames.

"Holy..." Dean took a few steps closer. "Lara, did you..."

"I didn't do it... I swear." I interrupted.

He and Sam exchanged glances. "But you knew?" Sam asked.

"I don't know. I just suddenly got an overwhelming feeling. I just knew we needed to get the hell outa there."

It didn't take but a few minutes before firetrucks, ambulances and the cops were swarming the street, and Dean definitely didn't want to stick around for that- So we got back in the car and returned to the motel.

What the hell just happened? Two seconds ago we were on a job, then suddenly the very house we were scoping out explodes into a gigantic fireball? Ok, no- This was definitely not coincidence. What's more, is why exactly did I have a feeling of impending doom? When my head suddenly started to ache, instantly I knew- It was the stupid spell dissolving. At least that little thing was explained, but we still had no idea why the mansion exploded.

When we got back to our motel, the first thing we did once hitting the room was get out of the ridiculous uniforms we were supposed to wear. Sam flicked on the tv and already there was news coverage on the explosion. So far, no survivors, well unless you wanted to count the three of us. And still I couldn't believe that just minutes ago we were in that house, and would have been in there when it exploded if I hadn't of had my freak out. Instantly my eyes fell onto my brothers and I let out a relieved sigh. Thank god Dean actually listened to me for once.

"What the hell happened?" Dean asked. "Are you sure you didn't do that, kid?"

He turned and looked at me as I sat blank faced on the end of the bed.

"No, I mean... I'm pretty sure I didn't."

"But there's no real way of knowing-" Sam shrugged. "With your spell dissolving, Lee said that you could be pretty destructive."

"Yeah, thanks. Good job at making me wonder if I had just killed an entire mansion full of innocent people."

"Few of em were vamps, so... Job well done on that one." Dean arched his brows.

"I didn't do it, guys. Really... I didn't."

They didn't believe me, I could tell- Which made me want to slap them silly. I would like to think I had some control over my actions, that I wouldn't have the ability to completely blow a house to pieces, but honestly- I had no idea. If we were going by what Lee said then I very well could have caused that explosion. Of course not by my own wants, it would have been completely accidental, but...

My thoughts caught off when the door to our room was forcefully kicked open and a short man with a thin beard stepped in.

We immediately rushed to our feet and pulled our guns, taking aim.

"Well well... The Winchesters. I was going to ask how you survived the house fire, but I guess you're sister is intuitive." He said, smiling.

"Who are you?" Dean asked.

"I'm the one that's supposed to kill you." He stepped forward again. "Was supposed to make it look like an accident, which is how you would explain the house fire, but you didn't stick around long enough for that. So... Now I guess I'll just have to eat ya."

"Ok, I guess the better question would be is, _what _are you?" Dean went on.

He didn't wait for the man to answer before firing a round straight into his chest. He stood there after the blow as a trickle of black ooze dribbled down his shirt and onto the floor.

"Ow-" He said sarcastically. "That smarts."

Leviathan. Great, a friggin Leviathan.

"I don't suppose you'd tell us exactly why you're going to kill us?" Sam asked.

"Boss said so." He shrugged. "We want you out of our hair, because let's face facts here- You're not exactly very..." He smirked. "Monster friendly."

Dean fired another round straight into the mans forehead, still he was unfazed. And afterwards he shared a glance with Sam, which apparently was a signal I wasn't let in on as Sam darted across the room. Dean stopped with firing and instead approached the man and started swinging. I blinked a few times over trying to understand what the heck was happening. Sam whipped around holding thick iron chains and in a matter of seconds and a few words of Latin the monster was lying on the floor, wrapped in the chains and unable to move.

"Guys..." I stepped forward and stared at the leviathan who looked to be in some sort of trance. "What just happened?"

Dean only sneered. "Let's just say we've been ready for a moment like this. Called in a favor, worked a little old magic, and now we have our prisoner."

"Wait a second..." I rubbed my head. "When did you set this up? And, uh... Why didn't you tell me about it?"

"Just in case it didn't work." Sam shrugged as if that was explanation enough.

I moved forward and nudged the guy with my foot. "So what are we gonna do with him now?"

"Find out what kills the son of a bitch." Dean smiled.

* * *

Little did I know that this entire escapade was a set up. That actually, nope, there were no vampires in that town and this whole deal of taking a job at the mansion was just a way to lure this Leviathan closer. Of course, neither brother knew that it would result in said mansion exploding, but- They somehow knew we were being followed, and of course conveniently left me out of the loop- I guess to make it more believable. If we were all three on guard for some flesh eating monster then he might have never come out of hiding. As far as the spell goes that had rendered this guy a vegetable, they made a call to an old buddy. A cop from what I could gather that had helped them out on a case a while back. Apparently this police officer had taken a twisted interest in witchcraft and since he owed them one, gave them the means of sticking this leviathan in chains.

The unfortunate side to this though was that it would only last a few days, which meant we had that much time to figure out what actually killed a friggin Leviathan.

And, after we had dragged him back to Rufus' cabin and locked him down in the basement- The first day was completely uneventful as far as finding something that could hurt the asshole. Nothing worked. Silver, iron, rock salt, absolutely no affect what so ever. We tried knives and swords blessed by priests, poisons of every kind, dead mans blood- Basically everything we had in our arsenal. Not only was it aggravating that nothing was working on him, but he had regained consciousness and was taunting us every ten seconds.

"Ya know-" He said, as Bobby filled a syringe with battery acid. "I'm going to really enjoy eating all of you."

"Well," Bobby turned and brandished the syringe. "Let me slather myself in barbeque sauce, huh?"

He walked over and jammed the needle in his arm, emptying the contents into him quickly. And, yet again, it had no affect.

"Ow, that stings." He sneered sarcastically. "Please, please stop."

"Shut up." Bobby turned back towards his table which was lined with various weapons and poisons.

"Try the rock salt again!" The monster grinned. "Or, maybe the silver knife. That one was fun."

Dean grumbled something from the corner and Bobby turned to him with a shrug.

"I'm almost out of options." He said.

"I can see that." Dean replied gruffly. "Keep workin on him. There's gotta be something."

He scowled his way to the stairs and started back up. Bobby looked exhausted, and rightfully so seeing is that he hadn't slept in twenty four hours.

"Why don't you take a little break?" I said. "I can take over for a while?"

He looked skeptical. "You sure? Last I heard, ya weren't exactly too thrilled with the whole torture scene."

"Well, seeing is that none of these things are working on him-" I shrugged. "I don't think I'll be hurting him much."

Nodding slightly, he started for the stairs. "I'll just grab somethin to eat and be back down. Don't get too close to him, kid."

I watched him go and let out a slight sigh. No, I wasn't one for torturing anything, but I think I would make an exception this time around. After all, it was Leviathan that had killed Cas, so... I think they were a little deserving of some pain.

After Bobby was gone, the man shifted in his seat forcing the chains to rattle.

"The Winchester sister-" He said, smiling still. "Ya know, I've been waiting to have a chat with you."

"Oh really?" I moved to the table and examined the weapons there, picking up a gold plated knife.

"I bet you're just dying to know what I do-" He cocked his head to the side. "After all, we learned quite a bit while we were hitching a ride with your angel pal. He had a lot of interesting thoughts."

Now I smirked. "Like I would believe anything you said anyways."

"Why would I lie, when the truth is so much better." He sat up as well as he could. "Did you know that Castiel considered Sam and Dean his brothers? That he thought of them as more of a family then all of the other angels in heaven? He figured he could count on them over anybody... Kinda pathetic and sad, really."

"You're not telling me anything I don't already know, buddy." I leaned against the table.

"Really?" His lips flinched and I could tell he was trying not to grin again. "What if I told you what he thought about you?"

My face fell flat. "That doesn't really matter anymore, now does it?"

"He... What's the right way to put it-" He paused and I felt myself cringe. "You confused him, for lack of better words. He honestly didn't know what to make of you. His exact train of thought was, you were an enigma because, you see, angels aren't supposed to have emotions. They're created specifically for combat and obedience."

"Why are you still talking?"

"Because my meals always taste better after they've cried." His brows arched. "Shall I go on? Good. So as I was saying- Sam and Dean? His brothers, but you? No, he didn't think of you like that. He didn't consider you family, not at all actually. To him, you were more than that."

I tried to maintain a facade that wasn't affected by his words. Maybe there _was_ a way for him to know everything going on in Cas' head, but it didn't matter. Cas was gone now, and whatever he would say would only bring about more pain- So really, there was no point in lingering down there anymore. I turned for the stairs but he wasn't done.

"He held you on a pedestal you know!" He shouted before I reached the stairs, which caused me to freeze. "At first it was because you were kind of like him, being a celestial creature, he felt a connection or bond- But that changed, it grew to something more than that."

"Lara." Dean said from the top of the stairs. "Come back up here. Stop listening to him."

My stomach was successfully twisted into a tight and painful knot, and after a nod I took one step up.

"It wasn't love though, if that's what you're thinking." When I glanced back at him from over my shoulder he was smiling again. "Angels don't even know what love is, or at least, love like _that_." Obviously he noticed my expression because he started laughing. "There it is... That's what I was waiting for. Glad to know you didn't disappoint me, Lara."

I stomped up the stairs after that and passed Dean, heading straight for the front door. Naturally he followed after me and once I stepped outside into fresh air, the first thing I wanted to do was to shove my fist through a wall.

Dean closed the door behind us and crossed his arms. "You shouldn't listen to anything that dick says. He's only tryin to provoke us."

After a few deep breaths, I shrugged. "It doesn't matter. Even if he's telling the truth, why would I care?"

"Right-" He stared at me for a moment with a scowl. "Well you keep tellin yourself that, cupcake. In the mean time, once you're done _not _being upset out here, come back inside and help us out, ok?"

He went back inside and once he was gone I flopped down on the railing of the porch and felt my blood boil. We better figure out a way to kill that Leviathan, or I was going to the next level and ripping him apart with my bare hands.


	61. Chapter 61

They entered the bank doors, Dean leading the way as he lugged his heavy duffel bag over his shoulder. Lara entered second with her jacket strategically buttoned in a fashion which would make it easy to rip open. Sam, he hardened his expression as he gave both siblings a nod. They each took their positions as Lara moved to stand in line behind three other people, Dean strolled his way up to a pretty teller with a yellow dress.

Sam saw the signal Dean gave with just a twitch of his index finger and while no one was looking he bolted the bank doors closed. He nodded back in return as Lara gazed at him from over her shoulder. She couldn't help but roll her eyes at how pathetic her supposed oldest brother seemed right about then. The way he was flirting with this woman made her stomach turn, and it took quite a lot to actually accomplish that, if anything actually. But, she let it slide when he finally pulled his gun from his jacket and shot it in the air.

"Nobody move this is a robbery!" He shouted, and Sam immediately stepped forward with his gun pulled.

Lara went right to her role, which was herding the patrons and bank staff into a small crowd, and taking the security guard as a hostage. But, he wasn't cooperating to her satisfaction so she quickly lodged a bullet in the back of his skull.

"Lara!" Sam rolled his eyes. "We wanted at least one surviving witness!"

"Sorry-" She shrugged. "But he was annoying me. Just... Pick another hostage as the witness."

Sam let his eyes trail across the crowd until spotting a middle aged woman who was shaking in fear.

"You-" He pointed at her with his gun and waved. "You'll do. Move away from the crowd."

"Really?" Dean shook his head in disapproval. "You choose that one?"

"You don't approve?" Sam retorted.

"Apparently not-" Lara stepped forward and shot the woman point blank in the chest. "Pick another."

Sam pursed his lips in a thin line and tried not to crack a smile. This one was impulsive, but he kind of liked that.

"Let's just get them in the safe." Dean ordered, and they started moving the hostages inside, once they were all kneeling on the floor, he nodded in approval. "Ok, so let's do this."

It only took about thirty seconds of firing into the crowd of people before they were bleeding puddles on the floor, and for good measure they shot off another round just to be certain they were all dead.

"Oops." Sam said. "We forgot to leave a witness."

"Don't worry about it." Dean snickered. "We're on candid camera."

He motioned towards the security camera and gave a little wave and smile.

"Ya know. They say that the camera adds ten pounds." Lara huffed. "Do you think I'll look fat?"

Both men eyed her up and down. "Nah, I think you're good." Dean answered.

"So," Sam eyed the bodies for a moment. "I guess we're not allowed to eat any of them, right?"

"I would say no. We're supposed to be the Winchesters, duh-" She rolled her eyes. "They don't go around eating people."

"Jeez. It's like waving a pork chop in front of a hungry dog and not letting him eat it." Sam scratched the back of his head. "Ok, we did our thing. Let's move on to the next."

The heist and slaughter took less than ten minutes, and they left soon after jumping into their impala and speeding away.

* * *

I flipped bacon in the skillet and popped the toast up in the toaster. Morning number two of trying to find a way of killing a leviathan and still we had no way. Really we were just grasping at straws now, and resorting to using something as simple as a friggin stick through the heart to see if it would kill the guy. And of course, it didn't. It was starting to become clear to all of us that there very well might _not _be a way to take these monsters down.

"Breakfast!" I called out.

Dean snorted awake on the sofa and Sam just barely acknowledged me from where he sat at his laptop. I took a moment to glance at him and let out a sigh. He wasn't staring at the screen of his laptop so much as he was glaring at an empty corner with wide eyes. Sam hadn't been sleeping much as of late, in fact- I was trying to remember when the last time was that I actually saw the big guy close his eyes. He tried to pretend he was fine, that he wasn't freaking out, but I knew it was only an act. He wasn't doing fine... His hallucinations were getting worse.

Dean I'm sure noticed it as well, but wouldn't say anything about it. There wasn't any way of fixing it that we knew of. The wall was broken in Sams head, there wasn't a way of just magically rebuilding it. Which meant, if he couldn't somehow get a grip on things, he was just going to get worse.

"Whatcha got?" Dean asked, stretching his way into the kitchen.

"Bacon, eggs, toast." I answered. "You gonna get Bobby? He's been in the basement all night."

"Yeah, guess the old man does need a break, huh?"

He laggardly made his way to the basement stairs and started down, and I warily approached Sam.

"Sammy?" I lied my hand on his shoulder and he didn't even flinch. "Yo, Sammy- Wake up."

He jumped slightly and blinked a few times over. "Yeah, uh... Sorry, I guess I was daydreaming, kiddo."

"Uhuh-" I motioned towards the stove. "Breakfast's ready."

He gave a slight smile, and I could see he was shoving his thumb onto the left over scar on his palm. Something that he had been doing quite a lot lately.

"Guess I'll wash up first, thanks." He made his way for the bathroom.

One of these days, when things weren't so filled with leviathans, we were all going to have to sit down and seriously talk about this issue.

I grabbed my own share of breakfast and flopped down on the sofa, flicking the tv on and started channel surfing. We didn't get many channels out here in the middle of no where, so when I flipped past a breaking news coverage I skipped past it, but then suddenly froze in my seat, quickly switching it back.

"Oh... Oh my god." I started to choke on my bacon. "Guys! Get in here, now!"

I didn't even remember flying to my feet and dropping my food on the floor, the only thing I could do was stand there gaping at the tv with my mouth hanging open.

When Dean, Sam and Bobby came running into the room, they as well could only stand there and stare at the tv in shock.

Was I just seeing things? Or was there video footage of myself and brothers opening fire on a bank full of people? Seeing is that everyone else looked about ready to crap themselves, I was guessing it was real.

According to what was said, two suspects who were long ago declared deceased had re-emerged and starting going on rampages, tagging along with them was their little sister who was previously unheard of. This bank wasn't the first, it was just another slaughter on the list of practically half a dozen other areas. Also, we were apparently being blamed for the house exploding in Atlanta. Each place they struck was nothing but a blood-bath, all of which had been recorded by security cameras.

"What the hell is this?" Bobby was the first to speak.

"What I would like to know is how?" I wrapped my arms around myself. "How is this possible? What are they, shifters?"

"Guess again!" The man chained in the basement shouted.

After watching my doppelganger blow a security guards head off, I quickly turned the tv off.

"I think we need to have a little talk with our friend downstairs." Dean said, and we followed him back to the basement.

When we stepped into the room he was already smirking.

"I guess you watched the news, huh? It's about time. This has been going on for over a week and you still haven't noticed." He said.

"Why are you assholes doing this?" I asked.

"Because we can, that's why. You don't get it do you? Our boss wants you gone, but since you're not the easiest people to track down we decided to do the next best thing. Turn you into the most wanted criminals in the country. It's gonna be a little hard for you to mess with us if you can't even walk around in public."

"You keep talkin about this big boss-" Dean said. "Just who is this dick?"

He smiled. "Oh, only one of the most powerful men in the country. And don't even bother thinking about going after him. You can't because remember- You _can't_ kill us!"

"Only a matter of time." Sam said. "If you can bleed, you can die."

"So, you guys can just take any form you want to, huh?" I asked. "How convenient."

"Actually it requires some form of DNA, so- We raided one of the motel rooms you lounged up in and swiped a little hair from the shower drain, and here comes your identical twins."

"Lara-" Dean turned to me "Go get everything packed, we're going after those s.o.b's."

Yeah I was eager to get out of the basement. Since my not so exciting conversation with that stupid leviathan I wasn't looking forward to having another. So I did as Dean asked and returned upstairs to pack our things, even though I knew it wasn't such a good idea to go after our twins. Yeah I wanted to stop them, of course I did- Allowing them to go around the country and slaughter everyone they came across was bad enough, but they were wearing our faces while doing so. But how does one stop a trio of flesh eating psychopaths when we had no way of taking them down? Answer to that... We wouldn't. So I couldn't help but wonder exactly what Dean was thinking.

But I did as he asked anyhow and got the car packed up- I didn't get the chance to return inside before the boys joined me.

"Question-" I said, holding my hand up before Dean could climb in the drivers seat. "What the heck are we supposed to do? We can't kill these things."

"We can-" Dean shrugged. "We just don't have a way of doing it yet."

"What do you mean we can?"

He smirked. "Think about it. This head honcho he keeps talking about. He wants us gone, obviously pretty damned badly if they're going to these lengths. Now ask yourself why would these leviathans be so desperate to get rid of us?" Sam and I exchanged befuddled looks. "It's because there obviously _is _a way to take these bastards down, and they know we got the juice to swing it. So they wanna get rid of us before we can get rid of them."

Sam nodded. "Ok, you might be right. But... That doesn't just erase the fact that as of right now-" He leaned against the roof of the car. "_We don't_ have a way to get rid of them."

"So unless you can pull a magic weapon out of your ass that slays leviathans, how're we gonna stop our twins?" I added.

He opened the car door and shrugged. "Bobby's gonna keep workin on our friend down there- So, we have however long it takes to track these yahoos down for him to find a way."

He climbed in and closed the door and Sam and I only stared at each other.

"Well, at least we're staying true to form." He snickered sarcastically. "Running head first into the line of fire without an actual plan."

"Yeah, because we're just _that _smart." I rolled my eyes and hopped in the car.


	62. Chapter 62

During the drive to where ever the heck we were going- Sammy had been glancing over maps and writing things down on a post-it note, staying silent the entire time. Actually neither of us said much during the way, but I'm sure we were all thinking the same thing- Especially after Dean flicked on the radio and we heard a news broadcast of our insane twins.

They hit another town and went postal on a library, killing sixteen people. The bodies were stacking up and up, and it was getting more and more gruesome. It wasn't enough to shoot these poor people, but now they started blowing up random buildings along the way as well. Two gas stations were nothing but steaming craters left behind, and two mobile homes in a trailer park had also been destroyed. With each place they hit they somehow left some form of video behind, whether it be by security cameras or forcing a victim to film everything from their cell phone.

Sam started flipping his map around before he sat up straight. "Uh, guys. I recognize these towns they're hitting."

"What are you talkin about?" Dean replied, barely taking his eyes off the road.

"Every town they're hitting is a place we've been to. Jobs we've taken over the years. They're purposely targeting every single place where we've saved lives. The next place they're gonna head to is St. Louis."

I scooted myself to the middle and leaned forward on the seat as he showed the trail he marked on the map of the places they'd been.

"What the hell?" Dean leaned over slightly before returning his attention to the road. "What, is this supposed to be some kind of message?"

"Seems like it." I said. "If they didn't want us to catch up with them somehow then they wouldn't be choosing places you guys have been to."

Deans grip tightened on the steering wheel. "Awesome. Well, we know where they're goin, but that doesn't really help us much- Since we still don't have a way to kill them."

But that didn't matter, even if it meant we had to chop them apart piece by piece we were going to try. Even if it killed us.

* * *

"You know what..." Laras twin said. "This is disgusting."

She threw the burger back onto her plate and shook her head.

"I honestly don't know how they eat this crap." Dean replied. "It's... It's nothing but petrified animal corpses slathered with slimy cheese, really? This is supposed to be food?"

"I'm trying to understand how this Sam guy can eat nothing but foliage and still be this huge-" He held up his arms. "Look at me, how can _this_ be normal?"

Lara and Deans twins eyed him, then shrugged. "He is a pretty big guy." Lara said.

"Yeah, and how does he get away with the crap he does, huh? And don't even get me started on the shit goin on in his head. I swear, it's like watching the friggin Exorcist twenty four seven. Nothing but spinning heads and spewing pea soup."

"Anything is better than this chick right here." Lara pointed to herself. "Mushy goo goo crap about that stupid angel being dead, and her idolizing this guy right here-" Now she pointed to Dean. "It's disgusting, seriously. She practically worships the blood soaked ground the dude walks on."

Dean shrugged. "Yeah, and he's a cocky son of a bitch if I've ever seen one. Thinks he's invincible and can do whatever the hell he wants. Talk about a hero complex."

Sam leaned forward with his elbows on the counter. "Someone remind me again why we can't just eat them and be done with it?"

"Because the boss said not to... Pretty sure he wants to do that." Lara answered.

Sam eyed Lara up and down. "Hey, you wanna trade? I'll take mushy goo goo crap over skitzo-vision any day."

"Nah-" Lara flipped her hair. "Sam's too tall, it's inconvenient."

"What about you?" Sam now glared at Deans twin. "You wanna trade?"

"Hell no. Yeah this Dean guy is a piece of work, but at least his clothes are better. Seriously, what's with all the plaid Sam wears? Does he think he's a friggin lumberjack?"

"I hate these people." Lara scowled. "But, gotta admit it is kinda fun completely fucking up their lives."

"The silver lining buried under all this pretentious crap." Dean agreed, then glanced at the clock on the wall. "Ok, well- We've been here long enough. Let's get to work."

* * *

I snorted awake when I heard Deans cell begin to ring, and after a quick glance out the window I noticed the sun was shining and we were still flying down the interstate.

"Hey, Bobby." Dean answered, and I looked at his reflection through the rear view mirror long enough to see his jaw clench. "St Louis? How many?" He went silent as he exchanged a glance with Sam. "Ok, got it. Keep us updated."

He hanged up and let out a deep sigh.

"What'd he say?" Sam asked.

"They hit St. Louis already, shot up my favorite burger joint."

Sam shook his head, and I could see his fists tighten. "Next stop is Idaho. Step on it."

The drive seemed never ending and in a way I wished that it _wouldn't _end. This wasn't going to end well, we all knew that- And it was basically the three of us rushing off to our own executions. By the time noon came around we were pulling into town and Dean parked the impala behind a small store. He thought it best that we walk the streets instead of driving, just in case our evil twins were there. We would be easy to spot in the impala, they would know instantly what to watch for.

I followed my brothers down the sidewalk of a busy street.

"So where do we start?" Sam asked.

"I have no idea." Dean answered. "I'm guessing a bank, or somewhere else crowded- Since that's their main targets."

"Uh, guys-" I said. "I don't think it would be such a good idea to waltz our way into a bank or something. Our faces have been all over the news, people know what to look for."

But we couldn't just stand around and wait for them to strike again either, _but_ we _also _didn't know where to look for them. There were numerous places to hit, with more than one bank in this town- Along with libraries, diners and anywhere else that tickled their fancy. We were only three people and we couldn't be at all places at once. We stopped on a street corner as Dean pulled his phone to call Bobby. In that instant I heard a very familiar rumble of an engine and for a moment I stood dumbfounded as I watched an impala- _Our _impala, drive on past and pull into a parking spot across the street. It didn't seem to register what was happening as I watched our evil twins step out of the car.

"Uh..." I finally managed to grunt out. "Guys, across the street."

I pointed towards them and Dean stood straight and stiff. "Son of a bitch..."

I could hear Bobby shouting something on the other end, but couldn't make out the words.

"We got our sights on em, Bobby-" Dean said. "Please, please tell me you got somethin for us?"

Whether he did or he didn't, we didn't get to find out- Because within seconds we were swarmed with police cars as the officers jumped out and pointed their guns at us.

"On the ground!" An older man shouted. "Drop the phone, get on the ground now!"

"Hold on a second!" Dean shouted. "The ones you want are right across the street!"

"I said get on the ground!" He repeated.

Dean grumbled and threw his phone to the ground and soon followed, Sam and I did the same and within seconds we were lying on our stomachs getting cuffed.

The cops weren't exactly gentle as they lugged us off the ground and stuffed us in individual cars, and by the time I was shoved into my own seat, my elbows were banged up and my left temple was bleeding. Before we sped off I caught a quick glance of my evil twin as she sat in the back of the impala, and needless to say that she was grinning like a maniac.

The drive to the jail was short, and once we were there Dean kept trying to ask if I was ok, but would get screamed at by a cop in return. They escorted us, and I use that word lightly, inside the jail and by that time the circulation was being cut off to my hands from the cuffs.

"Take the big one to the interrogation room." The sheriff or whatever he was, said. "The other two... Put them in the cells."

I passed a glance to poor Sammy as they pulled him into the room and slammed the door- Dean and I were led to the back of the jail where two individual cells were located. They were separated from the remainder of the cells, which led me to believe those were only used for people like our evil twins. Ya know, the ones that would shiv anyone and everyone that passed?

They locked me in one that was about the size of a dog kennel, and I'm being generous, as Dean was placed in the second across the room from me. Once the cops left us alone Dean let out a sigh.

"What now?" I asked.

"Good question-" His eyes darted around the room and I knew he was trying to find some way of escaping. "They're gonna be coming after us, you know that, right?"

Duh, of course I knew that. Those leviathan had easy access now- We were pretty much just sitting on a silver platter waiting to be chomped down on.

"Did Bobby happen to say anything before we got taken in?"

He shook his head. "He tried, but I didn't get the chance to hear him."

There wasn't a cot or bed in this cell, so I slid down the wall and sat on the floor. Dean however began to pace and did for the next twenty minutes before the Sheriff entered the room. He barely passed a glance at me and stomped right over to Dean.

"Your killing sprees are over." He said. "You nutcases won't hurt anyone ever again."

Dean grumbled and I rolled my eyes.

"You got the wrong people." Dean said. "Look, think whatever you want about us, but can I get my one phone call? That is the law, right? I'm allotted one call, that's all I'm askin... Please?"

Sometimes I was amazed at how persuasive my brothers could be, no matter what the circumstance they always seemed to manage to get what they wanted. Somehow, the Sheriff pulled out his cell phone and actually dialed the number Dean gave, which just so happened to be Bobbys. He wouldn't let him hold the phone, but he put it on speaker and held it in front of the bars.

"Yeah?" Bobby answered.

"Hey, we got popped, man." Dean said.

"Balls... Ok, I'll be there as soon as I can..."

"No-" Dean quickly cut him off. "Look, uh... They saw us, which means, they're gonna be coming after us. You get what I mean?"

"Got it, and I finally found somethin to use on em... It's a chemical, sodium borate, somethin found in industrial cleaning solutions, burns them to a crisp. Just look for anything with the word borax in it- After you've given them a bath with the stuff, chop off the heads. It doesn't kill em but it'll slow em down, as long as you keep the heads away from the bodies."

Dean nodded and I stood anxiously gripping the iron bars.

"Borax, ok random, thanks Bobby we'll do what we..."

The Sheriff quickly ended the call, his face was a twisted mass of confusion and disgust.

"What the hell is wrong with you people?" He said, shoving his phone back in his pocket. "Is shooting up banks not enough for you sickos? Now you gotta stoop to decapitation?"

He started for the door.

"Wait!" I called out. "You don't get it. Very very soon these _things _will be here, and if you don't let us stop them then they _are going to kill_ all of you."

The only thing he did was grimace as he quickly fled the room- Hearing the door slam shut was like a slap in the face.

"Great..." I threw up my arms. "We might as well drizzle ourselves in ketchup for those leviathan."

Dean of course tried shaking the door to his cell, but naturally it did no good. Afterwards he resorted to pacing again.

"How's your head, kid?" He asked.

I reached up and wiped the bloody cut with my sleeve. "I'll live, for at least the next five minutes until we're eaten."

"What I'd like to know..." Dean said, as he continued to pace. "Is just what happened to your walking atom bomb buddy."

"Lee?" I shrugged. "Well, he was a dick- Wouldn't surprise me if he said to hell with all of us."

He nodded, then stopped and rested against the bars. "Or, maybe he's dead..."

My feet skidded to a stop. "But how would that happen? Raphael's dead, Michael's locked in the pit with Lucifer- Gabriel, to my knowledge doesn't give a flying crap about Seraphim, so how would he be dead?"

"Maybe the leviathan got a hold of him? Hell, they had the mojo to take out Cas- Maybe they could do the same to a seraphim."

That thought had honestly never crossed my mind, but now that Dean mentioned it, it was successfully burning a horrifying image into my retinas. Yeah Lee was a cocky s.o.b at times, but he was also the only thing in creation that could actually help us out now. And, I suppose I considered him a friend, if you could actually very much dislike someone and still think of them as a friend that is.

"Well, whatever-" Dean went on. "I guess that's all moot now."

We continued with our anxious pacing when the door creaked open and the Sheriff walked in a second time.

He was completely ashen, the type of look that told us instantly that he was just witness to something awful. My guess... Leviathans chomping down on someone.

"I... I have no idea what I just saw." The man croaked out. "They were... I don't even know..."

"Ok, listen to me." Dean said adamantly. "You need to let us out, we can help you."

The poor mans hands were shaking as he quickly unlocked Deans cell, and then my own.

"Here's what you need to do, if you listen to us, then we'll live, understand?" Dean asked, and the man nodded. "Ok, go to the supply closet, find anything with the word borax on it, be careful and meet us back out front."

The Sheriff quickly fled in the opposite direction as Dean and I headed for the door that led to the main area of the building. It was silent in the hallway leading to the front room, except for phones ringing off the hook. When we reached a doorway Dean held his hand out and stopped me as he peered around the corner.

Nothing so far, but once we entered the area lined with desks and shelves, I could see what had the Sheriff so freaked out. Two of his officers were lying in bloody pieces on the floor, one seemed to be more than half eaten, his entrails were spread across a five foot span. Dean and I were careful to step over the gore and only stopped once we saw Sam standing in the doorway.

"Sam?" Dean asked, and judging by his harsh expression and the way he charged at us like a raging buffalo I would say that was a given it _wasn't_ him.

"Ok, not Sammy." I said and Dean started pushing me back towards the exit.

When he reached us he quickly grabbed Dean and threw him into a display case, myself was tossed over two desks before I smashed into the wall. It took a good five seconds to get the wind back in my lungs before I pulled myself to my feet. Dean cracked open a case on the wall and ripped out a fire axe and held it at the ready.

"What do you think you're gonna do with that?" Sams evil twin sneered. "You should know by now it won't do any good."

"Maybe not, at least not until your skin is melting." Dean grinned back.

The leviathan furrowed his brows for only a split second before the Sheriff came up from behind and quickly dumped a bucket of liquid over his head. He started shrieking and clawing at his face which was sizzling and smoking as his skin dissolved. Dean stepped up and took a large swing and I watched with widened eyes as evil Sams head flew a foot away.

"One down..." Dean commented.

Sams screaming drew the attention of another, as myself stepped into the room. Ok, this was trippy and not in a good way. She took a look at the headless Sam and tsked at us.

"That's not very nice, hacking off my brothers head." She said.

I didn't want to hear her, _me_, or whatever, speak so I grabbed the bucket from the Sheriff and quickly threw the contents in her face. Her squealing like a pig was the last thing we heard as Dean quickly hacked her head off as well.

"Where's my brother?" Dean asked, and the Sheriff led us over to the door.

I could hear voices from the inside, one was clearly Deans. Unfortunately I wasn't tall enough to see through the tiny window, so I could only stand there and watch as Dean took a quick peak inside, then grabbed the container of cleanser and shoved the door open. I heard a splash, followed by screaming, then a whack and thump as evil Deans head rolled past the doorway.

Once the way was clear I ran inside and straight to Sammy as the Sheriff removed the cuffs.

"Are you ok?" I asked.

His jaw was clenched so tight that I was afraid he'd crack his teeth, his eyes held that horrible "I'm going to tare your heart out" expression, and clearly he wasn't alright. But, I guess I could understand. It wasn't exactly fun times watching the evil twin of your oldest brother.

"Sam?" Dean nudged him with the back of his hand. "Are you ok?"

"I'm fine." He bitterly spat. "Let's just get the hell outa here."

He stood from the table, and none too gently, the chair was sent back flying into the wall.

"So, uh... I hate to ask." Dean said. "But, is there anyway you could help us out here?"

The sheriff stared down at the black ooze running out of the body. "I... Think I can. The FBI is on there way here, but if I can avoid explaining whatever the hell here happened tonight, I'd be glad to."

"Thanks-" Dean wiped tiny droplets of black ooze from his cheek. "The thing is, we kind of need you to kill us? Preferably without _actually _killing us?"

"Yeah I think I can swing that." The old man looked as white as a sheet.

Thank god we would come across a person every now and then that was actually willing to help us, rather than condemn us. It didn't happen very often but when it did it only made me appreciate all the more the jobs we did. Saving people wasn't easy, obviously- And we very rarely ever got any credit for it. Most of the time we were the ones accused of murder, or some other sort of crime. Not to mention that most normal people thought grave desecration was "disrespectful". But, they had no idea that our reasons for that was because generally, a vengeful spirit was roaming around shredding people.

We helped the sheriff clean up the black ooze mess and bagged the heads of our twins. It took about an hour all in all, and afterwards we were out the back door and heading down back alleys and side streets to where Dean left the car. We threw them in the trunk, which was disturbing actually, and then quickly left town.

After a few hours of driving we pulled off at the docks of a large man made lake and I took the moment to stretch my legs and relish the fresh air. Dean was lugging the bags with the heads in them out, and sat them aside on the ground.

"Ya know, this is creepy as all hell-" He said, snickering. "Whatcha say we stick the heads on pikes and scare Bobby with them?"

I rolled my eyes and took a glance at Sam, noticing that he still looked just as pissed as when we left the police station. Come to think of it, he hadn't said one damned word on the drive to the lake.

"Sammy?" I said. "What's up? Why do you look like you wanna hulk smash the hood of the car?"

He glared at me, and it instantly made me frown. I hated when he looked at me like that, it very rarely _ever_ happened. I was accustomed to his sweet puppy dog face.

"Sam?" Dean closed the trunk. "Something you wanna tell us?"

Now he turned his death stares to him. "Funny... I was gonna ask you the same thing."

"Ok?" Dean shrugged. "Apparently you're pissed, you wanna just get to telling me why?"

"I think you know."

Dean fumbled. "Do I? You wanna enlighten me?"

Sam snickered, but it wasn't out of amusement. "Yeah... So, when I was alone with the asshole version of _you_, wanna take a guess at what he told me?" When Dean still looked just as confused he went on. "Amy... My friend, you remember- The one you said was good? The one you _allowed _me to help?"

Deans face now went blank, and I only watched the interactions in confusion.

"Sam... You don't get it..."

"No, _you _don't! You lied to me! You killed her, and you lied to me about it!" Sams raised voice made me jump, and he yet again returned his attention to me. "Did you know about this too?"

"What?" I shook my head. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"She didn't know-" Dean replied. "I didn't tell her."

"Well... At least I can still trust _her_." Sam grabbed his bag from the car.

"What the hell are you doing?" Dean practically tripped over the bagged heads. "Where are you going?"

"I'm leaving... I can't be around you right now. You lied to me, Dean- And you killed my friend." He started walking away from the docks, but then stopped. "Lara, you wanna come with me?"

What the eff... Seriously, what the eff was happening?

"Don't be a drama queen, Sam-" Dean huffed. "Let's just talk about this, huh?"

"No! You don't get it, do you? I _can't _be _around _you right now, and I really don't think that Lara should stick around with you either. Who knows what all you've lied to her about."

Both brothers immediately looked at me, and I tried not to flip my shit.

"Are you serious?" I spat. "You're actually putting me in a situation like this? Jesus, why don't you just tie my arms to two galloping horses and let them rip me apart? Each of you could keep a half that way!"

Sam sighed and shook his head. "I'm just giving you an option. You can come with me, or you can stay with him."

"Yeah, like that's any better. You think it's fair to make me choose between the two of you?"

Dean pursed his lips. "Go with him, Lara."

I frowned even deeper now. "What?"

"Just go with, Sam. I'll be fine on my own."

He was giving me one of his looks, and if I wasn't on the verge of a nervous breakdown I wouldn't have argued so much. He was clearly telling me that Sammy wasn't capable of being on his own right now. With his hallucinations the last thing he needed to do was run off and be by himself. But still... Hearing Dean spit out those words was like a shot to the heart. He sounded so nonchalant about it, and yeah- I know it was just an act because he didn't want Sam on his own, but still... It hurt.

"Ok... fine." I bit back tears and grabbed my things from the trunk.

Sam was obviously pleased with that, because when he was pissed at Dean- He wanted everyone else to be pissed at him too. He stomped off ahead without another word spoken to our oldest brother and I had no choice but to follow. Dean continued to give me that look, and made a motion towards his phone in his hand- Letting me know that he would be calling, if not hourly then daily.

Somehow I just knew a moment like this would eventually come- And instead of allowing myself to be upset over it, instead I wanted to kick the crap out of both my idiot brothers.


	63. Chapter 63

_**This is gonna be a mega short chapter, but I promise a longer one next.**_

* * *

Three days passed and Sam was still content with staying away from Dean. I decided it was best to stop talking to him about it since it only resulted in me getting my head bit off. So far the only thing we did was "borrow" a car and start driving to no real destination. After the first two days we stopped off at a motel and remained there. Sam claimed he wanted a break since Dean wasn't around to nag at us. Sam was quiet a lot of the time, but when he wasn't he seemed to be in a halfway decent mood. Of course it was an act. Not only was he pissed about Dean killing his friend, but he was still battling with Satan in his own mind.

I could feel myself getting restless after the first few days in that motel room. I wasn't used to laying around with nothing to do but watch tv. I wanted a job to do, something to keep my mind off of things.

"Well?" I asked, glancing at Sam as he sat at the table.

"Nothing so far, kiddo." He answered. "Kinda weird, huh? Usually there's at least one strange death out there somewhere."

I flopped back on my stomach and started flicking through channels again.

Just after Sam and I left Dean behind we heard on the radio that we, or rather our evil twins, were shot and killed after trying to escape the jail in Idaho. So at least we didn't have to worry about that anymore.

"Didn't expect Colorado to be so boring." I scowled, turning the tv off and throwing the remote across the bed. "And there's nothing no where else? Jeez there's 49 other states to choose from."

Sam snickered. "Yeah, well- Things are pretty calm for the moment."

"Well," I rolled off the bed now. "I'm starving, so... You coming with me to get food, or what?"

He closed his laptop. "Sure. Same place as yesterday?"

"Might as well. Their burgers were awesome."

I grabbed my jacket and phone, discreetly checking it for messages as Sam headed out the door first.

Nada. Dean hadn't texted me in over a day, which of course was starting to freak me out. This whole being separated bullshit was really starting to tick me off. But, of course, Sam didn't seem to care less. And something told me that he wasn't really researching any jobs. I'm pretty sure he was taking advantage of this little vacation and wasn't eager to jump back into any work right now.

After I stepped out he locked the door and we headed off on foot. The town was relatively small and everything was within walking distance, and the restaurant was really only about five blocks away.

Halfway down the block I took a quick glance up at Sammy and noticed he had a cocky little smirk. Yeah, I hated to think it, or admit it to myself but he definitely appeared much happier now. Seriously, did Dean really make him that miserable?

"So it's not so bad, huh?" He suddenly asked.

"What exactly?"

"Taking a little break from all that crap. When was the last time we did that?" He shrugged. "Uh, we kind of never have."

"Hm, yeah-" I scowled. "I'm having a rip roaring good time."

He rolled his eyes. "Comon, I'm not that bad, right?"

"No, you're alright I guess." I smirked as did he. "It's just weird is all."

"Yeah... I know. But, you get it right? Why I needed to get away?"

Unfortunately I did. "He shouldn't have lied to you... But I also understand his motives."

"She wasn't like the others, Lara-" He stopped and turned to face me. "She wasn't like some vamp or rugaru that kills and doesn't give it a second thought."

"I know." Crossing my arms over my chest, I shrugged. "But, how could Dean know that? Yeah, maybe he should have trusted you about it, but the fact of the matter is is that even you wouldn't have known one way or the other if that chick would kill again."

"She wouldn't have... Believe me."

"What if her kid got sick again?"

His jaw clenched as he let his eyes move across the street. He knew I was right, that Dean was right too, but he was being stubborn.

"Anyways..." He shrugged. "I just need time."

We started off towards the restaurant once more and Sam had gone silent. I couldn't tell if he was pissed at me, or maybe he was letting what I said sink in. He had to have known that regardless if this woman was a friend, she had killed four innocent people- And no matter what the reason, it was wrong. Yes, it was pretty damned crappy that her son was so ill, but... Sam had to have known it wasn't a just reason for killing and eating peoples brains, right?

Maybe that's why he had gone silent. He didn't want to acknowledge that Dean was right, or that I was right. Either way I hoped that he would get over this pissed off bit soon because I didn't like being separated and forced to pick sides.

When we got to Main Street which was where the diner waited, Sam led the way towards the doors as I followed. Everything was as well as could be expected at the moment, until I caught glimpse of someone walking across the street. For a moment I didn't even think twice about the dude with a dark blue jacket and black pants, until he turned his face ever so slightly and I recognized that completely devoid of emotion expression.

My feet stopped as Sam walked on ahead of me. Ok, so now instead of hallucinating a dead Castiel, which was bad enough, now I was seeing a living version of him? One that was identical in every likeness except for the fact his suit and trench coat were missing?

He was just about to round the corner of the street when I took off running after him. No it couldn't have been him, but comon- What were the chances of him having an identical twin?

I didn't even bother watching for traffic as I darted into the street- Successfully jumping out in front of a car which forced them to slam on their breaks and lay on the horn. I ignored them, and Sam who by now had noticed I was running like a raving lunatic and was shouting at me.

I pushed through pedestrians on the sidewalk just as Cas rounded the corner and disappeared. When I finally managed to get to that damn corner he was gone. At least he wasn't walking any longer. I just barely caught a glimpse of his profile as he climbed into a taxi and it drove off.

Chasing cars wasn't exactly something I did well, and after it turned around corner I had no chance of catching up with it. I practically crashed face first into a telephone pole as I tried to stop. Now I had nothing else to do but watch the tail lights disappear in the distance.

"Cas... What the hell?" I shook my head. "Ok, it's official. I'm losing my mind."

I tried to catch my breath and heard Sams gigantic footsteps pounding up behind me.

"Lara, what the hell was that?" He panted. "Who were you chasing?"

Pushing my hair from my face, I sighed. "A ghost apparently. Or, not a real ghost- But a figment of my imagination."

Sam stared off in the direction the taxi had disappeared. "Uh. You wanna try explaining a little more, kiddo?"

"Dean didn't tell you?" I finally looked up at him.

"Tell me what?"

Swallowing a knot in my throat, I hadn't realized until that moment that I was on the verge of tears.

"Ever since Cas died... I keep seeing him. I guess it's like a hallucination. But today it was different. He didn't look dead, he was dressed like a normal guy and got in a friggin taxi."

Sam let out a deep breath and gave me his usual sad puppy eyes.

"I'm sorry, Lara. But you know it wasn't him... Right?"

"I know-" I started walking back towards Main Street. "But everything in me wishes that it was."


	64. Chapter 64

I had little interest in the food I ordered now, and Sam munched on his salad staring aimlessly out the restaurant window.

"So-" He said, pushing his plate aside. "You've seen him how many times now?"

"Three... And that's three too many."

He washed down his bite with a few sips of water. "What do you think it could mean? Is it just... I dunno, like what you said a hallucination? Or, is it something else?"

"What else would it be? I never experienced anything like this before until Cas died. My mind clearly isn't able to process or handle it and I'm flipping the frick out." He flattened his lips into a thin line and I sighed. "Sorry... I guess it's a cakewalk compared to what you're going through, right?"

"No, it's ok. I get it... Seeing things that aren't really there has kinda been my gig lately."

"How are you doing with it anyways? You never really talk about it, Sammy."

He shrugged and sat back against the booth. "Yeah, well... It's kinda hard to explain I guess. Lucifer is always there, I guess I just try to ignore him."

"So..." I actually glanced around the area as though I might see him. "Is he here right now?"

"Yeah- He's doing a reenactment of Fiddler on the Roof."

Um... Ok. Well, I suppose that was a little better than having Satan attempting to torture you physically. Although, having him constantly running his mouth and saying who knows what might have been just as bad.

I tried to eat a few french fries when my phone started vibrating. Sam immediately gave me a knowing look, furrowing his brows as I pulled it out and noticed a text from Dean.

"Well? What did he say?" He asked.

After reading it over a good five times to make sure I wasn't seeing things, I let out a breath of air.

"Dean said that they have a lead on the Leviathans big boss. They're pretty sure they know who he is, and where he is... They want us to come meet them."

Sam obviously wasn't happy about that, but... "Ok, well. I guess our vacation is cut short. Let's go."

He threw the money down on the table and we left the diner, heading back to the motel. It took only five minutes to pack up our crap and hit the road. We were supposed to meet Dean and Bobby at Rufus' cabin- So it was gonna be a long drive. Thankfully I fell asleep for most of it, and was only awake for the last hour. Sam didn't speak, and his expression was a little hard to read. Mainly because it seemed while he was definitely there physically, mentally on the other hand... No, he seemed to have checked out.

"Sam?" I nudged him. "You ok?"

He blinked a few times over. "Yeah, hey... Turn on the radio or something, ok?"

It was as though his hands were glued to the steering wheel, he refused to remove them. And as far as the radio goes, well... Pretty sure he was trying block out Satan tv going on in his head. So, I turned it on, and left it on the first station that wasn't playing news. It was some pop station with bouncy techno sounding music, but Sam didn't seem to care. Honestly I don't even think he heard it at all.

Sighing, I returned my attention out the passenger window. This was getting to the point where Dean and I could no longer ignore what was happening with Sammy. He was getting worse, his hallucinations were getting worse- And I had a feeling it wouldn't be long before he lost whatever was left of his mind. How were we supposed to fix that? It's not as though he could pop a pill everyday that would shut Lucifer up. This went well beyond anything that a doctor or psychiatrist could fix. No, our only hope would be to find someone that could repair the wall in his mind again- Which of course, such a person didn't exist. Cas was gone... Death, well- I'm pretty sure he wanted to eat us all for breakfast. Crowley was a dick-hole and probably couldn't swing that, and no other angel in existence would want anything to do with us. So, really... Who else would we get?

No one... Sammy was going to keep getting worse and Dean and I were powerless to stop it.

* * *

I somehow managed to coax Sam into letting me drive, since he was spazzing out and having trouble deciding what was real and what wasn't. Several times he nearly swerved off the road to avoid Lucifer who was standing in the middle of it. But, when we finally got to the cabin Dean was waiting out front for us, and already I could see the pissed off look on his face.

When we climbed out of the car the first thing he did was give me a hug, then simply nodded to Sam who was trying his best to ignore him.

"So, let's get on with it-" Dean said, heading for the door. "See what you guys have to say about this."

The cabin was the same as it always was, of course, only it seemed to be dirtier than the last time I was there. That's what happens when there isn't a chick around to clean it I guess.

Bobby was sitting at the table with a laptop in front of him, and since there wasn't much time I figured he got right down to business.

"Any of you idjits ever hear of a guy called Dick Roman?" He asked, obviously directing that question to Sam and I.

"Uh, no." Sam shrugged. "I don't think so."

"Well, ya should have- Even before big daddy levi got hold of him he was pretty big news."

"How did you figure out he was their leader, Bobby?" I asked.

"Called up a friend that owed me a favor, went by the name Frank Devereaux. Long story short, the guy is a nut-job and a half, but he's a certifiable genius. At least when it comes to diggin up info. Which is what he did."

"Went by?" Sam said. "Does that mean he's..."

"Dead-" Bobby cut him off. "Least that's what we figured after we paid him a visit and his trailer was coated in guts." He turned the laptop around, and on the screen was a picture of whom I assumed was this Dick Roman. "This is where we need your help, Sam. I got an email from Frank two days ago, some sorta fail safe I guess- In case he croaked a distress email would be sent out if any of his computer hardware was tryin to get cracked into." Now he clicked around and the email popped up. "We need ya to figure out who's tryin to crack it, and where."

Sam nodded and immediately sat down. "Yeah ok, I'm on it."

He started clicking around and Dean nudged me, and not so discreetly motioning towards the front door. I followed him back outside and once we were at a safe enough distance from the house he started in with the interrogating.

"Ok, so- How's he been doin?" He rolled his eyes slightly. "How have you been doin?"

"I'm ok, and Sam-" I blew out a breath of air. "Well, he's not getting any better, Dean. Only worse."

"Figured as much, has he said anything to you?"

"Not really. I think he tries to play it off, but... Just looking at his eyes I can tell that he's not handling it."

"What about you?"

I shrugged. "What about me?"

"Anymore ghost Cas sightings I should know about?"

"Dean..." My eyes rolled. "You know damn well that Cas isn't a ghost, and it's just my mind..."

"Have you seen him again?" He interrupted. "Recently?"

This wasn't what I wanted to be talking about, but I still nodded. "Yesterday, before the drive here. But... It wasn't like the first two times."

"How so?"

"Because he wasn't a walking corpse? He was alive, and dressed like... Just a random dude."

His eyes fell to the ground. "What the hell does that mean?"

"Nothing? I'm seeing things, that's what it means."

The front door creaked open and Bobby peeked out. "Hey, get back in here- Sam's found somethin."

Dean wasn't finished grilling me but I ignored his glares as I stepped back into the cabin. Sam waved us over and turned the laptop around. For a moment I wasn't sure what I was supposed to be looking at. It was a girl, clearly, probably not much older than myself with flaming red hair and a t-shirt with a video game emblem. We were watching her through a web-cam judging by the grainy feeds.

"Uh, who's that?" I asked.

"Whoever is hacking into Franks hard drive." Sam answered. "Traced it back to Chicago Illinois, Richard Roman Enterprises."

"Is she a Leviathan?" Dean spoke.

"Hard to tell, but I would say no-" Sam pulled his laptop back in front of him and punched a few buttons before arching his brows. "She's good, really good. But, I guess she doesn't realize that someone would actually trace it back to her. Gimme a sec, I might be able..." He trailed off, and I watched his fingers speed over the keys before he snickered. "Ok, apparently her name is Charlie Bradbury."

"Awesome-" Dean grabbed his jacket and keys. "Let's hit the road."

"Wait, uh... Shouldn't we talk about this a little more?" Sam said. "I mean, we can't really charge into that place with no way of killing this guy?"

"No, that's not what this is about right now-" Dean defended. "He's diggin up something, something big. And whatever it is, is on that hard drive. Why would he kill Frank and steal it if it wasn't something important?"

For once Sam and I seemed to be on the same side. Normally I was quick to jump on the "go in guns blazing" band wagon, but this was different. The leviathan weren't like any other monster we had gone up against before. Mainly because we couldn't actually kill them. Sure, we could douse them in borax and whack of their heads, but it didn't really kill them. Besides, if this Dick guy was really their "leader" or whatever, something told me a little splash of cleanser wouldn't be enough to slow him down.

But I didn't say anything, because really, what would be the point? Like it or not we did need to find out what this dude was looking for. And we needed to do it now before it was too late.

So we started driving, Bobby followed behind us in his own car as we drove straight through the day and part of the night before finally getting to Chicago. Once there we tracked down where this red headed chick lived and headed up the stairs of the apartment building. Just as always Dean didn't bother to knock and instead picked the lock and waltzed on in.

The girls entire apartment was covered in action figures, movie and game posters, and other random video game paraphernalia. Not to mention that she had more computers then a frickin Best Buy. They were everywhere. A laptop in the kitchen, in the bedroom, a desktop in the living room, and even a notebook in the bathroom. The chick liked her electronics apparently. But, she wasn't there, at least not yet. So we made our self comfortable and hid, and when I say hid, I mean sitting awkwardly behind the sofa- Or behind the bathroom door, which was where Dean was positioned. Bobby was keeping a lookout from his car in the front, and Sam was somewhere in the vicinity of the bedroom.

We stayed like that until dawn, when Bobby finally texted the three of us to let us know she was on her way up.

When I heard the front door creak open, I ducked down even further as footsteps rushed past and headed towards the kitchen. And after trying to peak around the sofa, I could see Charlie frantically throwing things in a backpack. She only stopped when Dean suddenly appeared in the doorway.

Of course she panicked, and started screaming and throwing things, grabbing bobble-heads off the counter and chucking them at his face.

"Hey, whoa, calm down!" Dean said. "We're not leviathans!"

She froze. "We?"

I popped up from behind the couch and Sam emerged from his hiding place carrying a container of borax with him.

"You know what this does to them, right?" Sam asked, holding up the cleanser, and she nervously nodded.

Sam poured it on his arm, then on Deans, and didn't bother to wait for me to do it myself before splashing me with it.

"Ok, now you." Dean said, and she quickly took the bottle and drenched her hand in it. With no sizzling of skin she let her eyes dart from each of us.

"Who the hell are you guys?" She asked.


	65. Chapter 65

After explaining the entire thing to Charlie, she sat blank and pale faced on the couch. We didn't spare any details either, or well... Dean didn't. He was completely and brutally honest in the fact that she was working in a building full of flesh eaters and that chances were she'd be eaten too.

"So..." She looked up finally. "And you guys are some kind of hunters? You actually, like, kill monsters?"

"Basically." I replied. "It's not as awesome as it sounds though."

"And why exactly are you here in my apartment right now?" She chuckled nervously. "I'm not a monster?"

"No- But you were doin some digging, through an old buddies hard drive. Sound familiar?" Dean asked.

She blinked a few times over. "Uh... How'd you know that was me?"

"Video voyeur-" I said sarcastically. "Sam watched you through your web-cam."

"Crap... That's kinda... _creepy... _And_ stalkerish_." She stood. "Ok, well, thanks for the info guys. I don't know about you but I think it's time I get the hell outa Dodge."

"Wait a second." Dean said, stopping her from bolting. "You gotta help us out here. Tell us what the hell was on that hard drive that Dick was so eager to get?"

She fidgeted on her feet before moving to her laptop. "It was weird. At first I thought I broke into some schitzos crazy files. It was talking about leviathans, black goo, eating people and stealing their identities. Total crap, or at least that's what I thought... Until I saw one of them eat my supervisor Pete." She shuddered. "Poor Pete, he never saw that big ugly mouth coming."

"And that's all?" Sam shrugged. "There was nothing else?"

"Duh, there was more- But I didn't get the chance to look at it. Call me crazy but after watching Pete get eaten, I wasn't gonna stick around anymore."

"Where's the hard drive now?" I asked, and her face went blank.

"Uh... Still in my cubicle... Why?"

Dean grumbled. "Ok, awesome."

"We can't just stroll in there, Dean." I said. "They know who we are, we'd never get past the doors."

"Ok, so wait a minute-" Charlie continued to nervously laugh. "What are the chances I survive after seeing what was on that hard drive?" When we all went silent she nodded. "Great. So, that means I'm gonna become leviathan chow. So, say I do somehow walk away, what happens?"

"Honestly?" Dean replied. "Nothin good. We're not sure what their end game is, and whatever it might be is probably on that hard drive."

"And you want me to go back in there and get it?"

Dean thought for a moment before nodding. "You're the only one who can."

"Dean..." Sam stood. "You can't ask her to go back in there, not now. It's too dangerous and she doesn't know what she's doing."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, but yeah... Sam's right. I don't know what I'm doing and I really, _really _don't want to go back in there." She paused and let out a sigh. "But, if I don't, and more and more people die- That would be on my ass, and I don't really like the thought of that." She sat up straight. "So what do I need to do?"

* * *

Charlie was nervously fidgeting in the backseat beside me, her palms were tapping on her knees and she was silently singing to herself. We'd gone over the plan a good fifty times I'm sure, and really- It shouldn't have been too difficult, or, well... It wouldn't have been if there were no monsters. Basically, all she had to do was go inside, retrieve the hard drive and leave. And, if by some chance she happened to get stopped on her way out, she make up some random excuse.

Ok, yeah, it wasn't a flawless plan and I secretly wanted to slap Dean silly for ever suggesting it. We didn't know this girl, and already we were hurling her into a dangerous situation that very well might end up getting her eaten.

"Hey, you ok, Charlie?" I asked.

She watched Sam and Dean talking to Bobby beside his car, then shrugged.

"Uh, define ok?" She replied. "No, I'm not ok- How do you guys do this for a living?"

"We don't get paid if that makes you feel any better?"

"How would that make me feel better?" She jerked her body on the seat to face me. "Seriously, this is completely nuts. I am not a monster hunter, ok? I'm a... I play video games, I have unhealthy obsessions with fandoms and comic books, yeah I occasionally hack into companies, or whatever, but this?"

"You don't have to do it you know?" Yeah she was on the verge of a major freak out. "You can always back out, really- No one would blame you."

"Yeah, right-" She huffed. "And you know what really sucks about this? Is that even after I do this, and maybe you guys kill Dick, I still can't go back to my normal life. Seriously, this sucks."

"Believe me, I know..." I reached into my backpack and pulled out a flask, waving it in front of her face. "Wanna drink?"

She quickly grabbed it and chugged down a mouthful. "Thanks." She gawked at me for a moment before sighing. "So, if by some miracle I don't die tonight... You wanna do something sometime?"

"Huh?"

"I know, radar-" She smiled. "You're clearly not into girls, I can see that. But give me a break here, I'm basically a walking Happy Meal. So, if I'm not eaten... Drinks?"

"Huh?" I repeated, and she only arched a brow at me. "Uh, oh... Uh..."

"Humor me!" She snapped back.

"Ok, yeah sure... Drinks... Fine."

She rolled her eyes. "Wow, ya really know how to make a girls heart flutter."

"Sorry, you caught me off guard."

"Duh... Don't worry I'm not trying to jump your bones or anything, just... Tryin to keep my mind off of dying."

Awkward and yet somewhat flattering, but still...

Dean and Sam finally got in the car, as Bobby jumped in his and we took off. The drive was short unfortunately, and we parked in an abandoned parking lot across the street which was surrounded by trees. Charlie slipped on her blue-tooth, as so advised by Dean, and we yet again went over the plan. She was gonna head inside, Bobby and I were going to park as close to the building as possible since he was driving an unrecognizable vehicle, and Sam and Dean were going to watch the entire thing from the security cameras that Charlie had hacked into before we left her apartment. Sounded simple enough, but when were things ever simple when it concerned us?

"Ok..." She kept taking a deep breaths. "Let's do this."

She opened the car door and we followed, thankfully we were obscured by the trees, as Charlie nervously began to pace.

"You ok?" Dean asked. "There's still the chance to back out?"

"No-" She shook her head. "I'm channeling my inner Hermione. I can do this."

Dean and I exchanged looks, and finally she started across the parking lot and eventually the street. Sam and Dean jumped back in the car while I got in with Bobby and he drove about a block until parking just adjacent to the office building and cutting the engine.

"I really, really hope we're not making a mistake here." I said.

Bobby nodded slightly, but kept his eyes fixed on the building and what little we could see of Charlie before she finally entered the front doors. Within seconds she was no longer in our sights and we had no choice but to sit and wait.

Dean kept us updated over the phone every now and then, claiming that she had rode the elevator up to her floor and was now sitting at her cubicle. So far things seemed to be going as smoothly as possible, but that changed when suddenly the windows of Bobbys car were shattered and each of us were grabbed and pulled out.

* * *

We were separated, Bobby was unconscious and being dragged through the building as he disappeared down a long hallway, I was being dragged down another- Halfway coherent, and seeing stars. They had hit me too, but apparently didn't get the job done correctly because I was still awake.

Well I had predicted something going wrong, but clearly I didn't expect this. I could only hope that Charlie had actually gotten out unscathed. The poor girl didn't know what the hell she had gotten herself into.

Fighting back against these two huge leviathan would have been completely pointless. I didn't have any borax on me, and whatever weapons I had they had already confiscated. But I figured if they were going to eat me then they would have by now, so I could only hope that Sam and Dean hadn't been taken in as well- And could some how bust us out.

We stopped at the end of the hallway and at a door, which was pulled open. I was basically thrown inside and thumped to the floor, playing dead for the moment, as they closed it and I heard it lock.

I opened my eyes and took in what I could see at the moment, which was the door and wall in front of me. It seemed to be an empty office, the carpet was gray and scratchy, the walls completely blank but for a bland cream paint. Somehow I managed to force myself to sit up, rubbing my throbbing head while I was at it before standing and taking a turn.

A gasp escaped my throat as I realized I wasn't alone, there was a body lying in the corner, whoever it was wasn't moving, and didn't appear to be breathing- But I warily approached anyhow.

"Uh... Hello?" I said awkwardly. "Please, please don't eat me." I added quietly before reaching down and tugging on the mans shoulder. I rolled him over and then fell backwards on my ass with wide eyes. "Lee?"

He didn't respond, his face was black and blue, his lips a shade of purple. He was breathing, but... Obviously didn't look at his best. There were cuts lining his wrists and forearms that had started to scab over, and clearly along with that, were bite marks. I started to frantically shake him now and after a good thirty seconds his eyes finally shot open.

"Bloody hell!" He shrieked, falling away and slamming back first into the wall. "Oh, dammit-" He huffed and rubbed his face. "What the hell are you doing here, Lara?"

"That's what I was just gonna ask you! What the hell?"

He blinked a few times over, and even though he looked like death warmed over he wasn't acting the slightest bit injured as he pulled himself to his feet.

"What's it look like I'm doing here? I'm obviously being held prisoner, really- Can't you deduce that outcome for yourself?"

And, clearly being held prisoner hadn't changed his a-hole attitude.

"How?" I stood as well. "How are you being held here? I thought the seraphim were untouchable?"

"Clearly not..." He brushed off his overcoat. "And here I thought that everything would be well and fine with all of the archangels out of my hair, but no- Now these abominations come into my life." Now he motioned towards the ceiling and I looked upwards seeing an enormous Enochian sigil painted there. "I'm trapped, this Dick knows what he's doing after all."

"How long have you been here?"

"What month is this?"

"May."

"Ah, wonderful. Then I've been here since the bloody things got loose. They tracked me down, obviously they knew my face because of Castiel-" He pointed his finger in my face. "What did I tell you about him? Very massive mistake in trusting him and appointing him your guardian." My jaw clenched and when he noticed my expression his golden brows arched. "Oh, my mistake. I didn't realize he was dead."

"Yeah, thanks for the sympathy, dick-" I crossed my arms. "So, you're trapped in here, and obviously that means your powers are out of service?"

"No, they're not. I've only been sitting in here getting the spit beaten out of me day in and day out just to get my jollies." He rolled his eyes at me. "Yes, you twat- It's because of the sigil on the ceiling."

We gawked at each other, both seething. "So how come they haven't eaten you yet?"

He snickered. "Because I have something Dick wants, obviously... He wants to know where God is- I won't tell him, so he's been doing the whole whips and chains and fangs trying to get me to talk. Little does he know that I have a very high threshold for pain."

"Why would a leviathan want to know where God is?"

"More then likely to kill him. Revenge and all that, you know? They're a tad bit angry at being locked in Purgatory since practically the beginning of time."

"Dick wants to kill god?" I snorted. "Is that even possible?"

He sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets. "Honestly? I haven't the slightest idea. Ordinarily I would say negative, but seeing is that he's so adamant about finding him I would guess that he must have some sort of plan up his sleeve. He knows something I don't."

I approached the door and yanked on the handle. "Well, now what? We're stuck in here, right?"

"I'm stuck in here-" He stomped forward as well. "You're not."

"Uh..." I glanced at the ceiling. "But... Sigil?"

"Would be effective if the spell was completely dissolved, since it's not..." He smirked. "You can't be held inside of it."

My eyes practically lit up at this point. "Give me a boost then, dude. I'll scratch through the sigil and you can burn our way outa here."

He frowned slightly. "About that... I can't kill them. My powers are basically useless against them."

"How is that possible? You could fry anything to a crisp."

"All but Leviathan, darling." He shrugged. "But, I can do what I can... It might not be much, I could burn them, but it won't kill them. Perhaps it will slow them down, I'm not sure. But what other choice do we have, aye?"

He stomped over and grabbed hold of me, crouching down until I was sitting on his shoulders. When he stood he grunted from the exertion.

"Gracious, what have you been eating, love?"

"Shut up!" I tried to keep my balance and almost fell, resorting to grabbing handfuls of his hair which caused him to squeal. "Guess you're a wussy without your superman powers."

"Just hurry the hell up before you break my blasted neck."

Trying to scratch through the sigil on the ceiling with nothing but my fingernails was annoying, and by the time I managed a small line which broke it there was blood caked under my nail bed. It must have did the trick because with a swoop he placed me back to my feet and instantly all of his wounds healed.

"Lovely..." He said, sighing and cracking his neck. "Although I think you gave me a hernia."

"Very funny. Ok, so... Think you can bust the door down?"

He gave me a look that said. "Break the door down? Of course I can break the door down!" And rose his hand. Instead of the door being blown off its hinges the entire wall was obliterated as pieces of tile and plaster flew in all directions.

"Ok... Guess that means we aren't making a quiet escape." I pointed towards the hallway. "Lead the way."

He stepped out first, and I knew it would only be a matter of seconds before we were swarmed. We made it to the end of the hall before the two men who had dragged me in here came charging at us. Lee set them on fire, as he said he could do, and they started shrieking and waving their arms but didn't die. But the fire didn't stop, it just kept burning so we started running until coming to an open area where receptionist desks and cubicles were located.

"Wait!" I said, pulling him to a stop. "We need to find Bobby. He's in here somewhere."

"Bobby? The old man?" He looked annoyed. "Oh, how much simpler it would be if I could only zap us out of here."

"Why can't you?"

"Sigils, darling, sigils. The entire building is covered in them, inside the walls." He started in the opposite direction, down the hall where I saw Bobby being dragged. "Let's hurry this up then."

Surprising enough we weren't ambushed by anymore leviathan, and I could only guess that the reason for that was there must have been some sort of outburst going on on another floor. Best guess? Sam and Dean reeking havoc. We started opening doors down the hallway, all of which were empty inside. It took ten minutes until we came across the only door on this floor that was locked, which Lee quickly kicked open. Bobby was inside, thankfully alive and seemingly unharmed, he was standing over a desk and glancing at papers and folders with a gun in his hand.

"How much time we got?" He asked, not taking his eyes off the papers.

"None-" I answered. "We gotta get out of here now!"

He frantically read as much of whatever was on there as possible before bolting away from the desk and following us out.

"Are you ok?" I asked as we ran.

"I'll survive."

"What were you reading?"

We skidded to a stop at the fire exit which were stairs leading down. Lee led the way down them and we ran as quickly as possible.

"Somethin Dick is conjuring up-" Bobby finally answered. "I don't know for sure what I was lookin at, but it's somethin bad."

When we reached the ground floor and stepped out of the stairs I could hear screaming coming from the lobby. It was Sam and Dean, I could tell... Once we stepped out Lee rose his hand and set a group of five men ablaze. Dean and Sam just barely ducked and avoided the flames, and I could see Charlie slumped on the floor by the door cradling a clearly broken arm.

When Bobby and I reached the boys, I glanced back long enough to see that Lee wasn't moving, his eyes were fixed on the ceiling and he was shaking his head.

"You have to go." He said, motioning towards the door. "I'll hold the rest of them off."

"The way's clear, man-" Dean said, pointing towards the door. "Let's just go."

"You don't understand!" Lee stomped forward. "If you don't leave, now- Then all of you will die. They will track you down and slaughter you. Take my advice, ditch that stupid car of yours and fall off the face of the earth unless you want to be eaten. Now, they can't kill me, I have something they want, so go!"

I couldn't understand why he wouldn't just follow us, unless... He couldn't? Maybe this entire building was basically a giant seraphim trap?

Sam scooped Charlie up off the floor and started for the door, Dean and Bobby followed- But I stayed.

"Lara, don't be daft, just leave." Lee said.

"What about you?"

He arched his brows and shrugged, then actually gave a slight smirk. "I want you to hold onto something for me." He then approached me and raised his hand, lying it against my chest. His palm started to glow bright and hot, to the point it felt like my skin was melting off. I nearly collapsed before he finally pulled away. "Take good care of that, it's yours now."

I tried to ask him what the hell he just did, but he gave me a shove and I flew out the front door and crashed into the pavement. When I got up I could see my brothers and Bobby waiting for me. Lee? He just stood there in the middle of the building with a cocky smirk. I got up and said a silent goodbye and started running as we started for the car across the street.

Gunfire erupted, pop pop pop, over and over again- And I glanced over my shoulder long enough to see a man with a suit aiming his gun straight at us. We each piled into the car, Bobby, Charlie and I squeezing in the back as Dean fired up the engine and floored it. We fishtailed out of the parking lot and sped past the building as more shots were fired at us.

The passenger side window in the front and back immediately shattered, and we all ducked to avoid the bullets. Dean kept on driving as well as he could being slumped over the steering wheel and finally we made it to a safe distance.

"Everyone ok?" Dean shouted.

"Yeah." I answered.

Charlie was shaking, and other than a broken arm seemed to be ok, and Bobby...

"Bobby?" I reached over and shook him by the shoulder, but his head fell to the side. "Bobby?!"

A trickle of blood dripped down his temple and the side of his face and I glanced up enough to see a bullet hole in his trucker cap.


	66. Chapter 66

Bobby had been in the ER for more than an hour, and I sat silently in the waiting room watching my brothers pace anxiously.

Not that it mattered to me, but Dean had claimed that Charlie grabbed the hard drive which she smuggled out of the building. And, after her busted arm was fixed, she took off- Promising to send us any information she found because clearly we didn't have the brains to dig through it ourselves. For the moment we had to at least try and trust her.

But that was the least of our worries right now. The only thing I cared about was what was happening with Bobby.

I tried _not _to be realistic this time- Tried _not _to tell myself that a bullet in the head wasn't usually a lethal wound. Bobby was a stubborn old man, and just as strong as all of us, if anyone could pull through this then it would definitely be him. But... I couldn't allow myself to get my hopes up again. I did with Cas, I told myself that he would make it, and then he died... And as horrible as it might have been to think- I was mentally preparing myself to hear that Bobby was gone now too.

Sam and Dean hadn't spoken, and for the moment Sam was letting his anger towards our oldest brother fall to the sidelines for now.

Another hour passed, and then another... And when finally a doctor emerged from the doors I barely heard him as he told my brothers that Bobby was still alive, but in a coma. There was no way of knowing if he would wake up or even survive the night.

It felt as though I was collapsing into myself, the walls came tumbling down as my entire life flashed before my eyes. Not the life I had with my actual Father John, but every instant that I had with Bobby. _He _was my Father, not John Winchester. He might have helped create me, but he had absolutely nothing to do with how I was brought up. That was on Bobby, and he did a hell of a job. Sam and Dean were completely crushed, and while Dean was trying to remain somewhat optimistic I could tell by the look in his eyes that he knew better.

Dean asked if we could see him, and the doctor reluctantly agreed. Sam tugged me up by the hand and kept his arm around my shoulders as we walked down the long hallway.

The place was swarming with doctors and nurses, I could hear beeping of heart monitors in the random rooms we passed, the voices of what seemed like hundreds of people that thumped against my skull like a hammer. I didn't want to see Bobby like this. Laid up and unconscious, dying... I didn't think I could handle that.

I wanted to run away, to run and run and never stop. Never look back, and completely disappear. It was within my capabilities to completely fall off the grid and be lost forever. Sam and Dean would never find me, no one else would either simply because I didn't know anyone else. Chances were Lee was dead now...

Lee... What had he done to me back at that office building? What did he supposedly give me that I was now responsible for taking care of?

Whatever... Who the hell cares what it was. It didn't matter.

We entered a room at the hall, and the bed inside was hidden behind a curtain. The same beeping of machines were echoing through this room as well and as Sam took a step forward to follow Dean- My feet wouldn't budge.

He jerked to a stop once he realized I wasn't following, still keeping his arm around my shoulders.

"Comon, kiddo." He said, trying his best to give me a small smile.

After a few deep breaths we finally rounded the curtain and caught first glimpses of Bobby.

I tried to ignore how deathly white he was, how still and frozen. There was a bandage wrapped around his head, and the heart monitor was beeping weakly.

"Hey, Bobby." Dean said, trying to keep his voice from cracking. "You just hold on, you hear me? You're gonna be ok."

He grabbed his hand, as though he expected Bobby to somehow respond, but I could see Deans chin quiver when nothing happened.

I moved to stand in the corner, while Sam stood on the opposite side of the bed.

"We gotta do something..." Sam said. "Dean, there's gotta be some way..."

"Some way of what?" He rose his eyes slightly. "He's gonna be fine."

"Dean..."

"He'll be fine!" He released Bobbys hand. "He's a tough old man, he's been through worse. It's one bullet, he can pull through it." Now he stomped towards the door. "I'm gonna take a walk."

Going after Dean was what I really wanted to do, but I knew it would result in probably getting shoved into a wall. When Dean was in a state like this it was best to just leave him be. Sam tried to talk to me but I could barely hear his words. I ended up sitting down in the uncomfortable recliner all hospital rooms have and feeling what little strength I might have had, in mind and body, fade away.

Lee had done something to me, and whatever it was didn't seem to be agreeing with me. I could tell. Of course it was easy to blame it on Lee when in reality it was the fact that the man I considered to be my Father was dying.

The hours dragged by so slowly it felt like decades. Bobby hadn't woken up, and according to his Doctor, he probably wouldn't. I tried not to listen, but from what I did hear there was dead brain tissue and swelling, which they couldn't go in and fix because Bobby was so weak. Basically, he was just going to lay there and get worse. Sometimes I seriously wondered if the medical field were any better than butchers with elaborate titles.

My brothers and I didn't speak, Sam was quiet as he clicked around on his phone, and Dean when he wasn't standing by Bobbys bedside was screaming and cursing at every doctor or nurse in existence. I knew that Sam was trying to find some way of fixing Bobby. Maybe a witch doctor of some kind, or some other sort of bad mojo.

Which of course would bring about a whole other set of problems if he actually went through with that.

Ya know... You always picture something going wrong, hell, maybe even envisioning your own death multiple times. I had, and it had actually happened. Come to think of it... We all had died at least once. The thing about dying is that you figure, once it happens, that's it... Lights out, maybe you'd be lucky and find yourself in sudden peace and tranquility which is supposed to be heaven. Others, for instance like my brother Dean, weren't as fortunate. He had sold his soul for Sammy, and in turn when he died had to endure the tortures of hell. Sammy, well... Same thing...

But when Bobby finally opened his eyes, for a moment I allowed myself to feel relief. Finally this entire ordeal was over, he was going to recover. He was trying to speak, to frantically tell us something but he couldn't force the words out. Sam instead handed him a marker and Bobby started to scribble a set of numbers down on Sams palm.

454893.

Then, as soon as the relief was there, it flitted away in a matter of seconds as Bobby gave a faint smile and muttered his signature "Idgits", closed his eyes and the heart monitor started to ring. We were pushed out of the room by nurses and doctors, and the last traces of Bobby I seen were gone as the door was slammed in our faces.

* * *

In the weeks that passed after Bobby was gone, we tried our best to figure out what the numbers were he had given us. From what Dean had determined so far, it didn't have anything to do with a phone number, a password, anything that should be obvious answers. In between the moments of binge drinking and researching Dean tried to pretend he was ok- We all tried to pretend. Which of course was easier said than done.

We had given Bobby a hunters funeral, which is what he wanted, but since that night we hadn't spoken of him. At least not anything other than what pertained to the numbers.

Dean had a collage of papers, maps, pictures of places people, or anything that might hold relevance to the numbers tacked up on the cabin wall. All of which had nothing to do with them. He was grasping at straws, and trying desperately to hold onto some kind of hope that Bobbys death hadn't been for nothing. He eventually ended up emailing the numbers to Charlie, hoping maybe she could figure them out. But, after three days of the email being sent, she hadn't responded.

Things just seemed to be going from bad to worse, first Cas died, then Bobby... I think the final straw that forced both Dean and I to practically fling ourselves off the nearest bridge was Sammy disappearing. We woke up and he was gone, he had taken my car which we had retrieved from Bobbys a couple weeks prior. He took my car, turned off the GPS on his phone and completely disappeared. We tried to find him, but Sam knew what he was doing, especially since this must have been brought on by his hallucinations. Whatever he thought he was running from, he was desperate to keep away from him- Which meant he completely vanished off the face of the earth.

We ended up in Iowa during the long chase of trying to find Sam when Dean got a phone call. It was a hospital in Illinois, stating that Sam had been admitted after an accident. They wouldn't go over the details on the phone, so we ended up driving straight through until coming to not a normal hospital, but... A psychiatric one. Once Dean set eyes on the building his face went ashen. We were both thinking the same thing, and dreading what we were going to hear.

We rushed inside and didn't bother knocking on the the doctors door before Dean shoved it open and stomped inside.

"What the hell is going on?" He asked. "Why is my brother stuck in here?"

The doctor, whose name had eluded me for the moment, stood and shook his head. "I'm sorry, if you'll just calm down and let me explain. Take a seat." He pointed to a set of leather chairs.

Dean and I sat and he went on. "Now, your brother was involved in an auto accident, he suffered a broken rib and lacerations."

"That's not that bad, why is he here?" Dean questioned.

"Are you not aware that your brother is in the thralls of a full blown psychotic episode? From what he claims, it's been over a week since he's slept, did you not notice that?"

Dean and I exchanged looks.

"I knew he was having trouble-" I said. "But I didn't think it was that bad."

"Well, it is. And we've pumped him as full of sedatives as we could and he still won't go under. He's had three violent altercations since he's been here with our staff, and under the circumstances we can't legally release him."

"Ok, ok- We get it." Dean said, standing. "We wanna see him."

Thankfully he didn't argue with us and gave us Sammys room number. This place was frightening, reminding me very much of the time I spent in a similar hospital. Those bland blank walls, the bars on the windows- Patients screaming behind locked doors. It killed me to think that Sam was stuck here with these people, and all from something he had no control over. Had the wall never broken, I was certain that he would be just as he used to be. Or maybe that was just wishful thinking. Eventually the wall would break anyhow, Death had said so- We just didn't plan on it being so soon.

When we entered his room Sam was lying on his bed, half awake and his head dropping to the side. He didn't seem to be coherent at all, and when we'd speak to him he gave no response. His body kept twitching and jerking, and eventually he began to mumble to himself.

"I don't know how much more I can take..." Dean suddenly said from the corner. "First Cas, then Bobby... Now this?"

"I know..." I mumbled in return.

"There's gotta be somethin we can do this time. Someone that could help. I don't care if it's hoodoo or some crazy witch doctor that I gotta fly to the amazon to find, there's gotta be someone."

"Then we'll start looking." I squeezed Sams hand and he didn't acknowledge me. "Where ever it might be, and how ever long it takes. We'll find someone."

"Let's go." He nudged me. "We're wastin time."


	67. Chapter 67

_**Return of Castiel this chapter. It's about damn time lol.**_

* * *

We got a motel room close to the hospital and for the next two days it was spent going back and forth to see Sam, to going through every single one of Bobbys contacts trying to find someone that could help. I would call a long list of people, Dean would call his own... And after I had gone through ten, yes ten people none of which seemed to know anything, or simply weren't interested in helping- I threw my phone across the room.

Dean rose his finger at me as he jotted something down on a piece of paper, I could hear a mans voice over the phone and he arched a brow.

"And it's the real deal? You're sure?" He asked. "Ok thanks a lot, man. I owe ya one." He hung up and then sighed. "Might have somethin here, cupcake. Some dude in Colorado, calls himself a faith healer."

"Sounds fishy." I replied.

"Yeah, that's what I thought, but according to Bobbys buddy, he's legit. He did all sorts of tests, set traps, the dude passed every single one." He thumped Bobbys binder closed. "It's at least worth checkin out I think."

"Might as well, I haven't found anything. So who is this guy?"

"Name's Emmanuel, he lives in Colorado Springs with a wife called Daphne."

"Colorado Springs?" I arched a brow. "Huh, weird. Sammy and me, that's where we were after we, or well _he_, wanted to take a little vacation."

"Whatever, pack your crap- We're heading out now."

I did as he said and packed everything up, and within minutes we were on the interstate and heading towards Colorado. Dean had gone silent, much like he was quite a lot lately- And after the first few hours on the road he suddenly pulled over into the parking lot of a motel and cut the engine.

"Here's the deal. You're gonna get a room and wait for me and this Emmanuel dude, just sit tight and wait."

"What? Why?"

"Because, with everything that's been goin on lately, I don't wanna take the risk of this faith healer bein something that might tare your friggin head off. Don't argue with me on this, and just do it. I got enough to worry about right now."

I swallowed a knot in my throat. "But, what if he actually is something dangerous, Dean. You shouldn't go alone."

"I said don't argue. Just get a room and wait. I don't wanna have to worry about you too. I'll take care of it." He reached across me and pushed my door open. "Go, before I kick your ass."

He didn't leave me much choice because I really did think that he would kick my ass if I fought with him on this one. If I had known he was gonna ditch me in some random town then I would have just stayed behind in Illinois with Sammy. So, with a grumble I climbed out of the car after grabbing my bag, and before closing the door glowered at him.

"You better call me after you've met the guy. Let me know you're ok."

"Yeah, yeah. I will."

I closed the door and he sped off, leaving me to stand in the parking lot seething.

* * *

Dean didn't stop only but to fill the car up with gas, and he arrived in Colorado Springs early the next morning. It was a long drive and he was exhausted, but they were living on borrowed time right now- Or at least, Sammy was. He triple checked the address he had written down before pulling to a stop in front of a two story house.

He was hoping this wasn't going to be a bust. That this healer wasn't actually some monster or demon in disguise. But there was a part of him that said even if he was, he would deal with it. He was past the point of caring about what was right or wrong now. So he made his way up the sidewalk and stairs, finally reaching the door. He didn't hesitate for a second to ring the doorbell and wait. Within seconds he could hear footsteps approaching as the door opened and a middle aged man with a sweater vest stepped out.

"Can I help you?" He asked.

"Yeah, uh. I'm looking for Emmanuel, a friend told me I could find him here."

"Well you found him." He smiled. "What can I help you with?"

Dean scratched the side of his head awkwardly. "Well, you see the thing is. I got a brother that's..."

His words caught off when movement from his peripheral vision caught his attention. He glanced over just long enough to see a woman through the window, bound and gagged in a chair and trying to scream for help.

Dean immediately went stiff, and the man in front of him only smiled. "You came at the wrong time, Winchester."

His eyes suddenly went black, and before Dean could pull his knife he was grabbed and slammed against the door.

"Just what interest do you have in this Emmanuel guy, huh?" Dean asked. "Why are you here?"

"That's our business. Crowley sent us, apparently Emmanuel is on his radar, and he wants to test a theory."

Dean finally got hold of his knife and plunged it into the mans stomach. "Sorry, but I need him first."

The demon screamed before slumping to the ground, and Dean kicked him roughly down the stairs. He didn't expect for someone to be standing at the bottom of them, and he definitely didn't expect for that man to look up at him with a pair of very familiar blue eyes.

For a moment Dean was stunned into silence, and just as Cas' name was almost uttered he spoke first.

"What was that creature?" Cas asked. "It's face was horrible, what was it?"

Dean flinched slightly, and in that instant he knew that Cas... Wasn't Cas anymore- Or at least, didn't remember that side of him.

"Uh..." Dean fumbled. "It was a demon, looks like he's got your wife tied up in there."

Cas' brows furrowed slightly, as he peered at Dean with an almost knowing look. It surprised Dean slightly to see that Cas didn't exactly seem very concerned that his wife was basically being held prisoner in there.

But Cas seemed to shake it off and started up the stairs and inside, Dean followed warily and watched as he untied the woman from the chair and helped her to her feet.

"Thank you for helping my wife from that creature." He said. "I'm Emmanuel, can I ask who you are?"

"I'm... I'm Dean." He answered.

"You've done us a great service, Dean-" Cas nodded. "Is there anything I can do to repay the favor?"

"Actually..." He stepped farther into the room, trying to decide if this was reality or a crazy dream. "I heard from a friend that... Well, that you heal people."

"I do seem to be of assistance, at least to a certain extent. What is that you need help with, Dean?"

"It's not me... It's my brother... Sam. He's in a bad way, really bad. I'm pretty desperate at this point."

Cas... Emmanuel, Dean wasn't sure what to consider him, only nodded. "Of course I'll help your brother. Where is he staying?"

"A hospital... In Illinois. I know it's a lot to ask to go all that way, but..."

"Nonsense. After what you did here today, it's the least I can do." He stepped away from Daphne who had remained silent. "I can leave right now if you want?"

Dean was uncomfortable, for a number of different reasons. Mainly because he wasn't sure if Cas really had no idea who he was, or if he was faking- If he was still crazy maniacal Cas, or the angel he had been in the past who was their friend. But they left the house anyhow and started on the way back. He could only hope that Cas would actually fix what he broke. After all, this was his fault that Sammy was in this situation in the first place.

An hour into the drive Dean shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "So, uh... How'd you come to realize you got healing powers?"

He wasn't sure how to approach questioning the guy, there was no telling what might make him snap again.

"It was the strangest thing-" Cas began. "I awoke on the edge of a river bank, completely alone and with no memories. Daphne had been hiking and stumbled across me. She took me back to her home and cared for me, I wasn't in the best of ways myself for the first month. It was by accident that I realized I had these abilities. She had broken her wrist after falling down the stairs and after a touch I healed her."

Dean swallowed a knot in his throat. "So, how'd you come to get the name Emmanuel?"

"A website for baby names."

"And you're just... Content with living your life with no memories? Not knowin who you were in the past, or what you might have done?"

"It's been difficult, I will admit it. But, it's been several months and I think I resigned to the fact that this is my life now." Cas suddenly sounded sullen.

"What if, ya know... What if you had done bad things in the past?" Dean tried to give him subtle glances.

"I don't feel like a bad person."

"Ok... Well, what if there were people in your life?"

"If there were then I have no way of finding them. Although... Sometimes, on rare occasions I would have flashes of memories... I never see faces unfortunately, only hear a voice."

Dean stared at him point blank now. "A voice?"

"It's faint and quiet, I can't understand what she's saying, it's barely audible enough to determine it's a female. But, I assume she must have been someone I had known."

"And you ignored that? How'd that not drive you crazy?"

Cas stared at his feet. "I simply tried to block it out... Dean, can I ask what your brother is suffering from? What's his diagnosis?"

"Uh..." Dean was trying to process what all he just learned. He had no doubts what so ever that this so called voice had been Laras, but of course he couldn't tell Cas that. "Well it's not exactly a physical thing."

"I understand, and that shouldn't be a problem. I can cure ailments of the mental and spiritual nature as well."

Dean clenched his jaw, everything was practically itching to jump off the tip of his tongue- To tell Cas the truth.

"Actually... Someone did it to him." He finally said. "A friend, or... Someone that was our friend. He did somethin to him, broke his friggin head. He hurt my brother, and he hurt my sister."

"You have a sister as well?" Cas arched his brows.

"Yeah... Her name's Lara." Dean tried to ignore the way Cas' eyes went squinty after hearing that name.

"And this friend... Did you kill him? I sense that you kill a lot of people?"

"No... Actually, we don't know if he's alive or not... He disappeared after it happened, we haven't seen him since. The thing is... Is Cas, he... Did a lot of bad things before he took off... Hurt a lot of people... It was bad enough what he did to Sam, but... Lara, she... It changed her. And I'm not sure if I can forgive that."

Cas nodded. "I can understand that. He seems to have hurt all of you..." He paused and tilted his head. "His name was Cas? That's an odd name isn't it?"

Dean only shook his head slightly, before remembering he was supposed to call his sister. He pulled his phone from his jacket and dialed, for some odd reason he put it on speaker. He was testing the angel in the seat beside him. He needed to know if there was something in him that remembered.

"Dean? Where are you?" She asked after it literally rang once.

"On our way back, kid." He answered, and he noticed Cas was staring blankly at the phone in his hand.

"So, everything's cool?"

"Yeah, we'll be there by morning. Just sit tight."

"I take it that it was legit?" He could tell by her tone that she was well aware she was on speaker, so she was being cautious.

"Seems to be. How're you doin?"

"I'm ok. I called the hospital. Sam's doin about the same. He tried to eat a little something earlier but had a freak out and wouldn't finish it. Other than that... I don't know."

Yet again Dean flicked his eyes towards Cas, who by this point was noticeably stiff in his seat. His expression was complete confusion, along with a slight twinge of fear.

"Yeah ok, well... We'll be there soon, cupcake."

She said a quiet goodbye and hung up, and Dean stuffed his phone in his pocket. Even after the phone was out of site, Cas' eyes were stuck on where it had been.

"You ok, dude?" He asked.

Cas swallowed a good three times over before returning his attention to the road. "Of course, I'm fine."

Dean tried to make himself as comfortable as possible, because it was clear that Cas was not fine. He recognized Laras voice, which meant... He very well might regain his memories and disappear again before he could fix Sammy.


	68. Chapter 68

I pulled the motel door open and gave half a smile to Dean, but he didn't return one. Instead, he looked at me with a face that I had never seen before. Was it... No, not shock because I had seen that before. No, this looked like he had just done something incredibly bad, either that, or had seen something incredibly bad.

"Oh crap. What's wrong? Is it Sam?" I asked, dreading the worst.

"No, uh-" He glanced over his shoulder and to the car parked across the street. "Listen." He cleared his throat nervously. "This _Emmanuel_, uh... He's not just a faith healer like we thought."

"Uh, ok? So what is he?"

"Just... Don't panic, don't flip out on me, Lara. You need to stay calm. He doesn't remember anything, he doesn't remember me, or you- And we need to keep it that way for now, got it?"

"What the hell are you talking about?" I was already panicking, doesn't a person know if you _don't _want someone to panic you don't tell them not to? "Who doesn't remember us?"

"Cas." He replied quickly, and I felt the blood drain from my face.

"Wh-What?"

"It's Cas, Lara. That Emmanuel dude. Turns out it's Cas. But, like I said- He doesn't remember anything. Somethin musta happened after the Leviathans left him, it scrambled his brain or something, I don't know. But he's got no clue who we are, and for right now-" He leaned closer, placing his hands on my shoulders as I tried not to pass out from lack of oxygen. "He can't remember, because if he does- He might flip out and take off again, and we need him to fix, Sammy... So, are you gonna stay cool?"

I tried to look past him and at the car in the distance. I could see someone standing beside it, staring off in the opposite direction and my heart skipped a beat. Just by that straight stiff posture alone I could tell Dean wasn't fucking with me.

"Ok." I said, swallowing a knot in my throat. "I'll stay cool."

"Emmanuel... His name is Emmanuel- Keep that in your head at all times."

I nodded, reaching back inside the motel room and grabbed my bag. "Yeah, got it. Don't worry."

He sighed deeply, and we started across the street. I followed behind him, feeling my nerves get the better of me as the car became closer and closer. I was gonna puke, I was gonna have a freak out. I needed about ten shots of whiskey just to calm me the fuck down.

We stopped at the front of the car and I finally pulled my eyes off the ground.

"Yeah, Emmanuel- This is my sister." Dean said. "Lara."

I knew I had gone completely stiff, enough so that it would easily be noticed. When I finally worked up the nerve to look at him my heart was about to pound out of my chest.

His expression was the same as it always used to be, but you couldn't miss the confusion etched across his face even if you tried. His brows were scrunched, and eyes squinted. He looked down right freaked out... Like he had just seen a ghost.

"Hey." I finally spoke. "Nice to meet you."

I held out my hand, unable to keep a smile from spreading across my face. I don't know where it came from, it just popped up.

He stared at my hand for a moment before taking it.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Lara." He finally said.

"Ok, let's get back on the road." Dean said, knocking his knuckles against the hood.

I yanked my hand back and crawled in the backseat, making myself comfortable in the middle. We left the parking lot seconds later.

The first hour of the drive was more than awkward. The only thing I wanted to do was grab him and hug him, never let him go again. Life was seriously a bitch sometimes, the one thing I had been wanting for months now, and still- Somehow, he wasn't really back in our lives.

It was inevitable, I knew I had to say something or else I was going to explode- But I knew that Dean was right. For the moment at least Cas needed to believe he was Emmanuel. He was our last shot at fixing Sammy. But, I was about to go crazy, this annoying silence was about to drive me up the wall. So, I leaned forward on the seat, resting my arms and head on the front, peering over at Cas as he passed me uncomfortable short glances.

"So... Emmanuel." I said, arching a brow. "You're married, huh? Tell me, what's that like?"

"Lara-" Dean glared at me from the rear view mirror.

"Shut up, Dean- I'm bored and you apparently suck at making conversation. We got a long drive and I don't wanna spend it in silence." Dean rolled his eyes at me, focusing back on the road. "So how's married life treating you, Emmanuel?"

"Can I ask why you want to know, Lara?" He replied.

"I'm writing an article, what's it to ya? Jeez are both of you dip-shits incapable of making conversation?"

Cas looked at Dean with a blank expression and Dean only shrugged with half a smirk.

"Yeah, she's kind of a smart ass. You'll get used to it." He said.

Cas returned his attention to the road. "In answer to your questions-" He finally spoke. "I suppose you could consider it normal. Although I have nothing to compare it to."

"_Interestinggg_-" I tilted my head, ignoring the death stares Dean was giving me from the mirror. "Got any kids?"

Now I clearly heard Dean grumble. Because it would be obvious Cas wouldn't have had children seeing is that he had only disappeared a few months ago.

"No, no children."

"Aw, that's too bad. Kids are just so cute and cuddly- Like little angels."

Dean jerked his head enough to the point that the car swerved.

"Lara, I swear to god I will dump your body in a ditch somewhere." He said, swatting at me over his shoulder.

I smirked and finally sat back, while Cas didn't have the slightest idea of what was happening.

Silence filled the car for another hour or so, and once it was dark I let out a few quiet sighs. What was the point of Cas being back if he didn't even remember us? That as soon as he was done healing Sammy he would go back to his new life and his wife? What was even the point in trying to form some kind of conversation with him? There wasn't one- So I scooted over behind the drivers seat and slumped down, resting my head against the window and watched the darkness fly by.

It was nearly 10 when Dean pulled over to fill the car up and grab us some dinner. Once he parked the car out in front of the diner he turned in his seat to face me.

"Same as usual, cupcake?" He asked.

"Yeah, sure."

"I'll be back in a few. Behave yourself."

"I know."

He climbed out of the car and jogged his way inside as I let out a deep sigh. Cas shifted slightly, taking peaks back at me nearly ten times as if I wouldn't notice.

"Dude-" I finally said. "What's your problem?"

"I'm sorry, but- Have we met before?" He asked.

I quickly returned my attention elsewhere. "Why would you ask that?"

"I'm not certain, but- There's something about you that feels familiar."

"I'm sure it's just a coincidence."

"Yes, you're probably right. Forgive me for making an assumption but you seem to be very angry and hostile, Lara. Can I ask why?"

Angry and hostile, huh? Gee I wonder why.

"It's a long story."

"Is it the same reason that Dean gave me. You were betrayed by a friend called Cas?"

For a moment I was stunned silent. Sure, Dean gets to talk about shit but I have to keep my mouth shut?

"Yeah, you could say that. But it was more than that for me. It wasn't just being betrayed."

"I've been told I'm an excellent listener, Lara." He turned, tilting his head as he looked at me from the front seat. "If I could help in some way I'd like to try."

Somehow I managed to snicker at that. For a moment it was just like old times. Me, sitting and blabbering and bitching, while he sat and listened.

"I'm not sure how to explain it really. Cas was... My best friend, the one person that I thought would never ever hurt me. I trusted him, more than anyone. Even more than I trusted my own brothers, and that says a hell of a lot because my brothers mean the world to me." His eyes fell downwards. "But, yeah. That all changed I guess. He changed. He did some really horrible things. Things that, honestly, should never be forgiven."

"Should?" He furrowed his brows at that. "Does that mean if the chance arose where he would ask for your forgiveness you might be willing to give it to him?"

I leaned forward, staring him directly in the eyes.

"I don't know. It's not as easy as that. For one, I didn't think I would ever see him again- For all I knew he was dead."

"But if he was sitting right in front of you right now, what would you tell him?"

It seemed that laughing managed to keep the tears away.

"What would I say..." I shook my head. "I guess I would say that... I missed him. That he meant more to me than he realized and when I thought he died I wished that I had died right along with him. That I haven't been the same in the months he's been gone, and no matter what happened in the past, the only thing I want is for things to be the way they used to be."

He nodded slightly. "It seems that you really care for him, maybe even more than you're willing to admit."

"Yeah, well-" I sighed. "We've all been there, right? Like I'm sure you feel the same way towards your wife."

That little tidbit about him was chafing me beyond belief, which I hated myself for.

His face remained blank as he rested his arm against the back of the seat.

"You were very honest with me, Lara. And if I'm going to be perfectly honest as well I can tell you that I'm very grateful to Daphne for saving me, and caring for me after she found me in the river. But, there are no feelings there. For a while I tried to convince myself that there was, but it always felt as though something was missing. Something that I couldn't explain."

Wait, did he say river? He was found in a river? My mouth went slightly agape as I remembered the horrible dream I had of Cas just after he died. He was lying on the banks of a river, dead... I assumed it was just my stupid mind being cruel to me, but now... No, it didn't matter. I couldn't think of that now. Never mind the fact that I was almost one hundred percent certain that the man I saw in Colorado, the one I chased like a friggin crazy woman _was_ actually Castiel after all. To think that if I had just caught up with him, and if he hadn't of gotten in that taxi we could have been reunited ages ago.

"I know what you mean." I could see Dean in line at the register with our to go orders in his hand. "It's like there's this hole in your gut that just won't go away, an empty hollow spot that just eats at you and eats at you and you don't know how to make it stop. You feel so... Broken and miserable, and no matter what you do to try and void it out, it only grows."

His eyes locked onto mine and remained there for several long seconds.

"That's exactly right." His voice had gone dim.

"Guess we have something in common then, hm?"

"Are... Are you certain we've never met before?"

I scooted back to the middle, leaning forward yet again. He didn't budge as I reached up and lightly smoothed my hand over a small section of his hair that was fly away from the others. I expected him to go stiff and startled at the gesture, just as he always used to- But instead he let out an almost relieved sigh as he tilted his head until my hand was on his cheek. His eyes flitted closed as I traced my thumb along his jaw line.

I only pulled away when Deans door flew open and he jumped back inside. For a moment he glanced at the two of us, Cas, noticeably shaken and myself on the verge of flinging myself off the nearest bridge.

"Everything ok?" He asked, and I just barely nodded before scooting back. He seemed satisfied with that answer then started searching through the bags. "Bacon cheeseburger, fries and a coke. Here ya go, kid."

"Thanks." I snatched the bag from his hand and ignored the way Cas was still gawking at me.

Dean ate as he drove and yet again we traveled in silence for another three hours before Dean was ready to pass out and I offered to drive.

He wasn't eager to do that, I suppose he didn't trust what I might say or do once he passed out in the back and Cas and I were left alone to the front seat. Honestly, what did he think would happen? Did he really think I was stupid enough to go blabbing secrets with him right there?

"Dean, seriously- Pull the car over, you've been driving for sixteen hours straight. Pull over and let me drive before you crash into a tree and kill us all." I said.

He rubbed his eyes before finally relenting and pulling over, we traded spots and after pulling on my seat belt and cranking the car into drive we took off. It didn't take five minutes for Dean to completely pass out in the backseat- His quiet snoring was the only sound to be heard in the car besides the hum of the pavement below the tires.

We didn't speak, because what could be said, really? Nothing. Yes, I wanted to tell him the truth. That we did know each other, that he was the this mysterious Cas both Dean and I had been talking about. But I couldn't... Not yet. Sammy needed his help, and I couldn't risk him disappearing.

"Lara can you explain something to me?" He suddenly asked.

I glanced to the backseat, noticing Dean was still snoring away, so I nodded. "Sure, I can try."

"This empty feeling that you described, has it ever inexplicably vanished, if even for a short instant?"

I chewed my bottom lip for a moment before sighing. "Possibly, why?"

"I can't explain it. For months there's always been something missing. Or at least, that's what it felt like-" He awkwardly glanced at me. "But that instant a few moments ago, in the parking lot..."

"You're just reading too much into it, dude." I tried to sound nonchalant, but I failed tenfold.

"Am I? Then how would you explain it?"

I couldn't, or well- Technically I could, but at the moment I wouldn't be able to actually say it. So, I went silent, keeping my eyes fixed on the road and Cas seemed to give up on expecting an answer out of me- And returned his attention out the passenger side window.

After another hour I pulled over at a small convenience store and gas station that was completely empty but for the man behind the register.

"Pit stop." I said, nudging Dean.

He awoke with a snort and rubbed his face. "Uh, yeah ok." He said. "I'll take over now."

I climbed out and headed inside to the bathroom, closing the door and immediately splashing water on my face. This could, quite possibly, be the very worst night of my life.

* * *

Dean and Cas watched Lara enter the tiny building and disappear in the back. Dean tried to chug down a few gulps of left over coke to try and wake himself up.

"How much farther is this hospital if I can ask?" Cas interrupted the awkward silence.

"Not far, maybe another hour or so-" Dean answered with a sigh. "Should be there around 4 a.m."

"I see, and then afterwards, the both of you would drive me back?"

"Sure, if that's what ya want. Guess we'd kinda owe ya one. Or you could take a bus, hell- I'll even pop for the ticket."

Cas nodded, keeping his eyes fixed on the lit up windows. "I suppose I would prefer it if you drove me, thank you."

"Sure-" Dean followed Cas' gazes to the windows, confused. "You ok, dude?"

"I'm not sure." He finally tore his eyes away. "Has Lara ever mentioned knowing..."

His words cut off when three men strode up to the convenience store doors, instantly he recognized their true faces.

"Dude, what is it? What are you lookin at?" Dean shifted and watched the men enter the building.

"It's more of them. Like the demons at my home." Cas immediately pushed the door open and practically fell out of the vehicle with grace not fitting of an angel.

Dean cursed and followed after him, pulling his knife from his jacket.

* * *

I walked slowly through the isles glancing at the travel snacks and drinks. I grabbed a bottle of coke and small bag of pretzels before moving down the next. There was individual wrapped packages of pie, which I quickly grabbed for Dean. When I turned to head to the register I barely had the chance to even see a tall man standing in front of me before he backhanded me and I went soaring down the isle.

When I crashed to a stop on a small end cap full of candy, I reached down into my jacket and yanked out the angel blade, only to have it kicked away as the man grabbed my by the collar.

"Lucky me." He said. "We got the Seraphim and the rebel angel all in one go."

He yanked me up and slammed my back into the cooler behind me, my feet weren't touching the ground anymore. I tried kicking and punching him of course but it had no effect.

He didn't last long as Dean suddenly appeared behind him and jammed his knife through his throat.

I crashed to the ground a second time after the demon was dead, only to be charged at again by two more, afterwards they split up and one went for Dean while the second descended upon me. I was seeing stars, after hitting my head against the glass of the cooler- So I wasn't much for fighting when the demon yanked me up by a handful of hair. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Dean getting walloped in the jaw before jamming his knife in the mans stomach.

The man wrapped his hand around my throat and held me in the air with one arm and just as I was starting to black out the angel blade was suddenly crammed into his back and stuck out through his chest. Once he was dead I crashed to the floor to my hands and knees and sucked in deep lung fulls of air. I felt a comforting hand on the center of my back, as another reached around and carefully pulled me up to my knees.

"Are you alright?" Cas asked, and I tried to blink away the haze.

I grunted from the pain. "Oh yeah peachy. If you get past the severe head trauma."

"Let me help with that." He cupped his hand on the side of my head and the pain disappeared.

"Yeah don't worry about me-" Dean said sarcastically. "I'm just fine!"

Cas helped me to my feet, then suddenly seemed to realize that he should be feeling awkward right about now and took a step away.

"You ok, Dean?" I asked. "That a-hole punched you pretty good."

"Fine, seriously, what the hell. Why are demons crawling out of our asses right now?"

"Have you just met us?" I snorted out a laugh. "This isn't exactly uncommon."

"I gather-" Cas interrupted. "That this sort of thing happens frequently with you two?"

Dean rolled his eyes, wiping his knife clean on a dead guys jacket. "Yeah, we're not really new to all this crap."

Cas stared at the dead bodies surrounding us, then shook his head. "I can't imagine being forced to live through this day after day. How do you cope with it?"

"By stabbing them." I said, with a smirk. "Or, well, ya know- Whatever else works."

"Let's get outa here." Dean tugged me by the wrist. "Chatty time is over."

We rushed from the place and jumped back in the car, and sped away before anyone could notice the bodies. Thankfully it was so late that the road was dead silent.

No one had anything to say for the next couple hours, until we pulled into the parking lot on the hill overlooking the hospital where Sam was laid up. We hadn't climbed out of the car for ten seconds when Cas stared down at the entrance and a half dozen people sitting outside. One was in a wheelchair, two seemed to be security guards, the rest were hospital staff.

"This is not good." He said. "It's more of them, more demons."

Dean shook his head. "All of them?"

"Yes, all of them. How do you suggest we get past them? There are only two of your special knives between us."

This had gone on far enough as far as I was concerned- Yes, Cas didn't know who the frick he was and I knew Dean wanted it to stay that way, but Sam was trapped inside this pit, more then likely with even more demons. It was past the point of worrying over Cas freaking out.

"Dean, can I talk to you for a second?" I grabbed his sleeve and yanked him with me a good twenty feet away. "We can't do this anymore."

"What?"

"This, this entire thing you idiot- We can't get inside that damned building and even if we somehow made it past the hoard of demons standing out there, what about the ones inside, huh? Sam is trapped in there, whacked out of his mind, in a place crawling with hell spawn. Now, I know this is risky but I think we should tell him the truth."

He let out a huff of air, and shook his head. "Yeah, ok- And what if we tell him and he flips out, huh? What if he takes off and disappears? What then?"

I crossed my arms. "Look, it's either tell him the truth about what he is, or Sam lies in there and dies- Now what's it gonna be?"

"Excuse me?" Cas suddenly said from behind Dean. "But, why do I get the feeling that you're talking about me?"

"Because we are." I spat, and Dean glared at me.

He took a few confused steps closer. "Does this mean that I was right? You and I have met before?"

"Yeah you could say that." Dean relented. "We go way back."

"So, we're friends, we were friends?"

"You're Cas." I said. "So take that as you want..."

"I'm Cas?" He looked flabbergasted. "I'm the one that... I'm sorry, I don't remember, I don't remember you or... anything."

"Ok, we're wasting precious time here." I stood in front of him. "I'm gonna skip right to the grand finale here- You're an angel, which means, you've got the power to smite all of those demons down there without even flinching. Which means, if you don't go down there and do it- Then we can't get in to help Sam. Now I'm sure you're freaking out right now and are probably as confused as crap, but you're gonna have to put on your big boy pants now and get over it."

His brows scrunched as he looked down at me. "An angel? How could..."

"Think about it, man-" Dean said. "You don't eat, you don't sleep- You don't do anything a normal human guy would do, sound about right?" Cas nodded slightly. "It's how you're able to heal people and do the superman crap that you do."

"You said I have the ability to kill those demons- I don't remember how."

"I'm sure it will come back to you." I tried to smile, but it was forced. "In the past it was as easy as breathing."

He peered over his shoulder and at the plethora of demons in the parking lot. "I suppose I can try."

We watched him descend the hill warily, the poor guy looked scared shitless as he approached the small crowd of demons.

Since we were unable to hear what was being said, we only observed as he moved closer to one of the men, exchanged words for a split second before Cas gave him a little shove. Even from such a distance I could tell he was confused, but somehow instinctively knew to press his palm against the demons forehead. After a bright white light the demon slumped to the ground, and Cas took a moment to gather himself before approaching the other five. They were each taken down in a matter of seconds and after the way was clear Dean and I rushed down the hill.

Cas was standing stiff and frozen with his back to us, surrounded by bodies.

"Good job." Dean said, and Cas went even more stiff.

"I remember you." He said, turning to face us. "I remember everything. Everything that I did- What I became, the lives I took..." He cringed. "So many horrible things."

Dean passed me a panicked expression. "Look, uh- I know that it's not exactly something worth remembering..."

"I shouldn't be here." He interrupted, then started walking across the parking lot.

"Hey!" I chased after him and grabbed him by the arm. "Don't you dare go disappearing on me again. I swear to god if you do that I will hunt you down, tie you to a chair and beat the shit out of you!"

He kept walking until we were back up the hill and behind the car.

"I'm sorry, Lara. I truly am- But I shouldn't be here. I should be dead. This makes no sense."

"I don't care if it doesn't make sense, you're not running out on me again."

Dean jogged to catch up. "Listen, we've all got a shit ton of emotional baggage right now, but Sam is in there and he needs your help."

"_Because _of _me_, because I broke his wall. Sam is dying because of me. And it's not only that, do you have any idea the death toll on earth, and in heaven? I slaughtered hundreds of my siblings. I should have never survived what happened," Cas shook his head. "So why did I? What purpose would it be for me to still be here?"

"Maybe it's so you can fix all of this." Dean answered. "Yeah, you caused a lot of damage, fucked a lot up, but maybe the reason you're still breathing right now is so you can fix all of that?"

He went silent as Dean held up a finger, telling him not to move as he started rifling through the trunk. When he turned he was holding Cas' folded trench-coat- Something that he had kept throughout the months we thought he was dead. That little sentimental item should have told Cas instantly that even though he did some horrible things, both Dean and I weren't ready to say goodbye yet. We kept that as a memento, because we never wanted to forget him.

Once his eyes set on that coat it was as though the entirety of his past came rushing back, the expression in his eyes was pretty much indescribable.

"We can talk about all of this later, Cas." I said. "But in the mean time. Can you at least help Sammy... Please?"

He nodded slightly, then looked up at Dean. "Before I go in, can I talk to Lara alone... For just a moment?"

Dean shrugged and held out the trench-coat, which Cas gladly took, then he turned and descended the hill again.

"I just want to say..." He started. "That I am so unbelievably sorry for what I did. I remember what I said just after I opened the door and took in all of those souls. How I... Threatened to destroy all of you."

"Cas-" I shook my head. "That doesn't matter now."

"It does. I started down a destructive path that was motivated by pure hate and anger, I shattered Sams wall as if it were nothing, I tried to prevent you from killing Eve. There's so much that I did that should never be forgiven." He looked away. "I just wanted to apologize for hurting you."

"Ok-" I grabbed his hand. "I'm sure you remember what I said earlier tonight in the car, right?" He nodded. "Take that as however you want it, but- What I want right now is to just push all of that crap that happened aside and for my brother to be well again, which is something only you can do. We can talk about all of this drama afterwards if you want."

I dragged him with me down the hill and towards the hospital. I was afraid if I let go of his hand he'd vanish. We met Dean at the door and Cas told us to wait a few moments so he could clear the area of demons, then to meet in Sams room.

It was the longest five minutes of my life.


	69. Chapter 69

We entered the building and headed straight up to Sammys room, and once hitting the door and noticing him lying on the bed still spazzing out, while Cas sat beside him- I skidded to a stop.

"What's goin on?" Dean asked before I could. "Why is he still..."

"I can't fix him." Cas answered, standing. "It's not possible."

I rushed to Sammys side and sat down. "What do you mean it's not possible?"

"I'm sorry- I tried, but... There's simply nothing left to rebuild. The wall has completely crumbled, been stomped into dust. Whatever is happening to Sam, whatever he's experiencing right now has ingrained itself so far into the deepest recesses of his mind that there's nothing I can do."

My heart dropped to my feet, I was holding Sams hand but his eyes were darting every which direction and he had no idea that we were even there.

"So, this is it?" Dean asked, his face was pure devastation. "You mean that Sammy's gonna stay like this until he dies?"

Cas moved to stand beside him, he seemed to be deep in thought. "There's no way to repair what's been broken... But..." He then returned to the bed and I quickly stood. "There might be something else."

"What?" I asked. "What are you going to do?"

"It'll be fine-" He didn't answer my question. "It's better this way." He stared down at Sam and let out a deep sigh. "Just in case I don't get the chance to say it again, Sam- I am so sorry for ever inflicting this upon you."

Dean and I exchanged panicked expressions before Cas lied his hand against Sams forehead. In a matter of seconds Sam started shrieking as what seemed to be bright red veins began to glow brightly and spread into Cas' hand. It kept creeping upwards until his face was stained with it, his eyes glowing that frightening crimson. Sam was gasping for air until Cas finally pulled away and immediately slumped over.

Sam pushed himself up after a few deep breaths.

"Cas?" Sam asked, sitting up quickly and drenched in sweat. "Is that you?"

Cas wobbly glanced towards the bed, only to let out a horrified gasp and fall away, slamming backwards into the far end wall.

It was in that instant that Dean and I knew exactly what he'd done. Instead of fixing Sams wall, he decided to take in all of Sams horrible delusions and memories of Lucifer, the tortures, and gory aftermath of hell.

* * *

"Lara, be reasonable here." Dean said, pursing his lips at me. "You can't do this."

"I'm doing it, Dean. You can't stop me, so just get in your friggin car and go." I snapped back.

Sam let out a sigh. "Are you sure about this? There's no telling how, or even if he'll snap outa this."

"I don't care. I'm not just gonna run off and leave him here like this." I crossed my arms. "I'm staying. I have my phone, it's not a big deal. All of the demons that knew about him are dead, you can go. I'll be fine."

Dean was firmly against this, for obvious reasons- Sam wasn't exactly pleased with it either but he was more understanding about the situation. He was a much more forgiving person than our eldest brother, and was just thankful that Cas had relieved him of his burden.

"Well, we can't exactly hog tie you and throw you in the trunk." Sam smiled faintly. "So, if you really wanna do this. I won't object."

"Thanks-" I glared at Dean. "Ok, your turn."

He grumbled under his breath. "I'm not cool with it, you know that. But, Sammy's right. Can't hog tie ya, can't knock you out, so- If you wanna stay here then fine."

"But, what are you gonna do, kiddo?" Sam shrugged. "You can't sleep here 24/7."

I stared up to the second floor window where Cas was staying. "I'll figure something out. Don't worry about it."

"Listen to me-" Dean was stern. "If anything happens, anything at all you friggin pick up that damn phone and call me, got it?" I nodded, duh, what did he think I would do? "And, if for some reason things get too sticky to stay here, you can always go to Rufus' cabin. It actually might be better to do that, just in case."

Yeah, I knew that. Keeping an angel that wasn't exactly in his right mind in a hospital full of people wasn't the brightest idea in the world. There was no telling what might go wrong, or what he might say or do. Plus there was always the fact that he didn't eat, sleep or drink so that might gain unwanted attention. But, Dean was clearly trying to tell me, without coming off as "bossy" that he wanted me to get out of this place and take Cas to the cabin. Which, quite honestly, is what I had intended on doing all along. I suppose Dean and I really were a lot alike in some ways.

"Ok, we're gonna take off." Dean gave me a bone crushing hug, followed by Sammy.

"You guys be careful. I know you're gonna do whatever you can to take down Dick, so... Just, don't get yourselves eaten, ok? And I expect phone calls everyday, not whenever the fuck you feel like it, got it?"

"Yes, Mom." Sam said sarcastically.

I watched them climb in the car, and as they peeled out of the drive Dean gave a little honk and I waved them off. After they were out of sight I turned and darted back inside, up the stairs and to Sams old room. Cas was where I left him, sitting on the edge of the bed staring blankly at the wall. Since he was admitted into the hospital they stuck him in the usual plain white crazy garbs that I was all too familiar with. He hadn't spoken since he took on Sams insanity and quite honestly I wasn't even sure if he knew I was there. Thankfully though he had stopped with the freak outs, although there were times that he would see whatever he thought was actually there and revert back to scared shitless.

After closing the door I sat down beside him, grabbing his hand. He didn't look away from the wall but his fingers did twitch.

"Cas. Look, I don't know if you're hearing me right now, but I'm gonna take you out of here. I'm sure you know that it's not safe to stay here. I have somewhere else to take you that's better." He blinked a few times over but didn't speak. "Here's the deal. You're gonna work with me on this, you understand? So that means, you're not gonna blip away and disappear, you're gonna do what I say for once. Do you object?"

Still nothing but silence but yet again, his fingers twitched.

"K, I'll take that as a no." I stood and tried to walk away but his hand suddenly tightened on my own and I practically was jerked backwards. "What is it? What's wrong?"

I wished I could read his mind right at that very moment because he just wasn't talkin.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm just gonna grab our crap, ok?" I said and he slowly released my hand.

I moved to where I left my bag, and where Cas' trench-coat lied and scooped it up, and after slinging my bag over my shoulder I held the coat out to him and tried to force out a smile.

"Comon. I know you want to." I said.

His eyes just barely flicked upwards, long enough to glance at the coat before reaching up and taking it. That was a triumph as far as I was concerned, especially when he stood and put it on.

"Ok, so. It might be tricky getting you out of here right now since it's still light out, but hey- When do we not take risks, right?"

His response to that was lying his hand on my shoulder and quickly zapping us to the hospital parking lot. For a moment I tried to contain myself and not lash out at him. Since he did that, it told me that he was still coherent enough to zap himself away if he decided to do so- And that was _not _cool with me.

"Cas..." I arched a brow. "That was helpful and all, but... No zapping anymore, please? I don't want you taking off."

I latched onto his hand and dragged him with me across the parking lot until coming to a car that I could hot wire. Yeah, it was stupid stealing a friggin car in the middle of the day but I wanted to get Cas as far away from this hellhole as possible.

We took off and started our way to Rufus' cabin in Montana. It was gonna be a friggin long drive, but it didn't matter. I stopped only long enough to swap license plates a few times, fill up with gas and grab a quick bite- And kept on going. Sleeping wasn't an option right now. Besides, I had driven more in one sitting, sixteen hours should be a cakewalk. Ok, yeah that was bullshit. I was accustomed to riding in the backseat and dozing off whenever I wanted to now a days, so driving for that long a distance was gonna be tricky. After ten hours I ended up having to pull over in the driveway of an abandoned house.

"I'm gonna try to sleep a couple hours, you're not going anywhere, right?" I asked.

Cas merely sighed deeply, keeping his attention on the dashboard.

"Yeah, you better be there when I wake up." I cranked the seat back some and tried to relax.

Needless to say that sleeping didn't come easily. As soon as I would start to drift off my eyes would shoot open to make certain that Cas hadn't run away. But he didn't, for the hours that I was in and out he didn't budge from his seat, or take his attention off the dashboard. When I finally decided to just give it up, it was nearing dawn and I could barely hold my head up. Driving was sure to be fun this morning, and we'd be lucky if I didn't careen us off a bridge.

For the next six hours I struggled to stay conscious and ended up swerving off the road a couple of times before we finally pulled into the drive of Rufus' cabin. Sometime during the moments of trying to stay awake and actually driving to the cabin, Cas had lied his head against the headrest and closed his eyes. So, when I cut the engine of the car and nudged him, and he didn't move- Of course I started to panic.

"Cas?" I shook him lightly by the shoulder but he didn't budge. "Cas, wake up. We're here."

But angels didn't sleep, so... Uh, yeah- What the hell was happening?

I climbed over to the middle of the seat beside him and grabbed his face, pulling it towards me. His eyes were still closed but his breathing was steady.

"Cas?" Yet again I shook him. "Shit... What happened?"

After practically falling out of the car and rounding to the passenger side, I yanked the door open. He slumped halfway out of the car and I caught him, but fell to the ground. He was heavier than me, obviously- And was complete dead weight. So I had to lay there for a moment with his head and shoulder smashing into my stomach before I wriggled free and grabbed him from under his arms.

Dragging him was almost impossible, but I somehow managed it- And after he was in the cabin I kicked the door closed and tried to lug him onto the sofa. It took a good ten times until he wasn't hanging halfway over the edge anymore and once I was finished I had to sit and catch my breath.

"Cas, please wake up..." I grabbed his hand and yanked it a few times over. "I don't know what to do."

He didn't flinch in the slightest, so that told me that where ever he was now, was somewhere far far away. He couldn't hear me.

My phone vibrated inside my pocket and I pulled it out long enough to see it was Dean calling. I quickly answered.

"Yeah." I spat, still out of breath.

"Uh, dude- What the hell are you doing? Why are you breathing like that? No, wait, scratch that... I don't wanna know." Dean said.

"Shut the eff up, Dean. Get your mind out of the gutter for five fucking seconds!"

"Whoa, ok ok. What the hell? What happened?"

Trying to calm myself down right now clearly wasn't possible.

"I've been driving for sixteen hours to get to Rufus' cabin. We jut got here, but Cas is unconscious and won't wake up. No matter what I do."

"Is he breathing?"

"Uh, yes, Dean- He's friggin breathing. But he's just out cold, I don't know what's wrong with him."

He relayed what I was saying to Sam, because I could clearly hear him in the background asking what was going on. I guess my screeching cat voice carried over the phone.

"Ok. Well, as long as he's breathing then try not to freak out, kid." Dean said, yeah it was so lovely how he could remain so calm during all of this. "He's an angel, so- Maybe this is just what's gonna happen for him to get over this hump. Right?"

"Yeah... Maybe." I rubbed my temples in aggravation. "So, where are you guys, what are you doing?"

"We're in Kansas- Looking into a little somethin. Don't worry, it's nothin dangerous."

Liar, he was such a liar. Everything we did in our lives was dangerous, did he really expect me to fall for that?

"Uhuh, and what exactly is this _not_ dangerous thing?" I asked, and he didn't answer. "Something to do with Dick, or..."

"Possibly. But like I said, it's nothin dangerous- You got enough on your hands right now, cupcake- You don't need to go and freak out over what we're doin. Just hang tight and we'll call ya tomorrow."

I tried to blurt out something snippy but he hung up on me, so I had no choice but to curse to myself before lying my phone on the coffee table.

This was going to be hell. I had an unconscious angel, and no way of knowing how to take care of him, and two idiot brothers that were out there somewhere trying to find a way to gank a flesh eating Leviathan that was foaming at the mouth over them. Yeah, this was going to be fucking dandy.


	70. Chapter 70

**_Just saying thanks again for all the reviews and favs/followers. You guys are awesome_**

* * *

It had been days, and Cas still hadn't woken up. He hadn't even budged and had been lying in the same position on the sofa since I stuffed him on it. Of course I would talk to him, trying to coax him into opening his eyes- But it didn't work. He still couldn't hear me obviously, and I was slowly beginning to wonder if whatever he had taken off of Sammy was going to have the same affects on him, that it did on my brother. Would this end up killing him?

Sam and Dean weren't exactly honoring their promise of calling me everyday, and after leaving them a slew of angry texts and voice mails Sammy finally texted me back and told me to cool it, that they were fine and were still looking into things. They'd get in touch whenever they had the chance.

Mother fuckers. Sure, it was easy for them to ditch me and go off on their merry way and expect me not to freak out over them. And here I was, practically having anxiety attacks every ten friggin seconds because I was basically alone in this cabin, with no one to talk to but a knocked out Cas- And left to my thoughts that were constantly conjuring up the worse possible scenarios. I swore that when those a-holes finally decided to come and pay me a visit they would be blessed with my foot to their teabags.

And yet again, three more days passed and still Cas wasn't awake, and the last message I had from Dean was saying they were driving across the country to Illinois which if I remembered correctly, was where Dicks main hang out happened to be. Yeah, those boys were up to something dangerous, and they weren't bothering to fill me in on what. Yeah I know, I know- It was because they didn't want me freaking out because I clearly was having an episode over Cas, but comon- They should know better by now than to keep me in the dark. It would only make me resentful and want to bash their pretty faces in.

So, after another two days, I finally managed to coax myself into a decent sleep in the armchair. It was the best sleep I'd had in what felt like years, and I was actually upset when I finally started to stir.

I could hear birds chirping outside, and felt a beam of sunshine drifting across my face as my eyes finally opened.

Instantly I let out a squeal and jerked myself to sit up straight as I was lying on the sofa now, and Cas was sitting in front of me on the coffee table with a crooked little smile on his face.

"Cas?" I said, trying to catch my breath. "How... How long have you been awake?"

He tilted his head slightly. "I woke up a few hours ago, did you sleep well, Lara?"

I know I blabbered out something that couldn't be understood as I tried to process what was happening.

"How did, when..." I shook my head. "Are you ok?"

"Of course." He smiled again. "Lara, did you know that when you sleep, you sometimes mumble rather amusing things?"

"Why am I on the sofa?" I asked instead of answering him.

"I put you there. You didn't look very comfortable sitting in that chair."

"And you just... Sat there the entire time and watched me sleep?"

He shrugged, and there was something in his eyes that I couldn't quite read. "Does that make you uncomfortable?"

"A little, yeah-" I rubbed my head. "So, you really feel ok?"

His eyes got a little twirly and the smirk wouldn't fade. "Did you know, that there are dozens of species of animals that mate for life, and if for some reason their partner is killed, that quite often at times the one that remains will linger by the corpse for days, or until they eventually starve to death?"

I arched a brow. "Uh what?"

"It's true. Doves, for instance. If one of them, say, gets run over by a vehicle, the other will stay right there on the road and risk getting run over themselves." His smiled turned into a frown. "It's really quite beautiful I imagine, that a creature without the mental capability of keeping themselves from getting hit by a car in the first place could be so loyal to another that clearly isn't alive anymore."

"_Ook_. Why are you telling me this?"

He didn't answer and instead stood. "I prepared breakfast for you."

I shifted on the couch and stared at the table, feeling my face go blank. Seriously, what the eff?

"Dude, where'd you get a table cloth? And, uh... The vase of flowers?"

"There's a meadow not far from here. Full of flowers... And bees."

I stood now, following him warily to the table. "Uh, bees?"

"They're fascinating creatures, Lara. Have you ever carefully studied them?"

"Cas..." Ok, I was officially freaked out. "Are you sure you're ok?"

"Where are Sam and Dean?" He pulled out my chair and I was actually hesitant to sit.

Before answering, I only stared at the food in confusion. Since when did Cas know how to cook? And not just that, but what looked like home made waffles. Ok, really- I was gonna have another anxiety attack here.

"They're..." I tried to pinch myself to see if I was still asleep, but after bruising up my arm a good ten times I finally had to conclude that this was reality. "They're doing whatever it is they do when I'm not around. They're assholes and won't fill me in."

"I suppose they do that so you won't worry about them. So you don't have any idea on what they're trying to accomplish?"

He sat down across from me, and actually, I was not in the slightest bit hungry, but I didn't wanna hurt his feelings so I took a bite. And, hot damn, the angel could cook.

"I think it's something to do with Dick." I finally answered. "Wait a minute, no- I wanna know how you're awake right now and why the heck you were unconscious for almost two weeks?"

He had a very vacant expression, then shrugged nonchalantly. "I suppose it was just my own way of coping. But, that's over." He smiled again. "And, I'm fine now."

Uh, no he wasn't. Not only was he acting nuttier than a fruitcake, but he was smiling, which is something Cas never did, and he was friggin cooking me breakfast and picking wildflowers. No, no no. I didn't know what was going on just yet, but as long as he wasn't running away or having hallucinations to the point of going mute, then I would deal with it.

"And you just," I shook my head. "Woke up?"

"Well, I heard a sound. Almost like dropping a pin on a sheet of glass. Ping, then I woke up. That's when I noticed you sleeping and thought I should go to the meadow out back, and then I got distracted by following a honey bee, and before I knew it the morning was almost over and I hadn't prepared your breakfast, so..."

"Dude." I held up my hand. "You're rambling. You don't ramble. What's going on?"

He only shrugged again and for a moment I had to ask myself if he was drunk or stoned off his ass by the way he was acting. But of course that wasn't it.

Push it aside, I told myself. Just push it aside and be thankful he was awake and not flipping out in a bad way, or disappearing.

I tried to eat as much as possible because he wouldn't stop gawking at me, and afterwards I stood to clear the table and he jumped up and took the dishes from me. I could only stand there with a lopsided expression as he started washing them and I tried to shake it away.

"Uh... I'm gonna go take a shower?" I said, pointing to the stairs. "You're not going anywhere, right?"

"No, I'll be here."

"Ok, and uh... I know that this meadow isn't very far from the cabin, but I still don't think it's very safe to run out there by yourself. At least in here, ya know, we have the sigils?"

He nodded to that, and I started up the stairs, wondering if when I would come back down if he'd still be there. So, I was as fast as possible as I showered and changed into a fresh pair of clothes, and when I flew back down the stairs Cas was sitting on the coffee table again staring at the tv screen. From what I could tell he was watching some sort of documentary on ant eaters. Since he was preoccupied I grabbed my phone and excused myself outside, quickly dialing Sams number.

"Hey, Lara." He answered.

"Dude. Cas is awake."

"I'm putting you on speaker..." Slight pause. "Ok, go."

"Cas is awake." I repeated.

"And, how is he?" Dean asked.

"Um, well why don't you zip on over here and find out for yourself there, bud."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean? Is he delusional Cas, or normal Cas, or... Something else?"

"Just, get over here. How far are you?"

"Far- We might be a couple days." I could hear clanking in the background. "When exactly did Cas wake up, huh?" Dean asked.

"This morning I think, not sure when exactly since I was asleep."

I heard them mumble something quietly to each other, which made me scowl.

"Yeah ok-" Sam said. "We'll be there as soon as we can, but yeah, it might be a few days."

"Whatever, just letting you know. Continue on with your super secret mission." I hung up on him then stomped back in the cabin.

As soon as I closed the door and turned around, I jumped at seeing Cas standing literally two inches from me.

"Were you talking to Sam and Dean?" He asked.

"Yeah, they're gonna head over here in a couple days."

He nodded, then smiled. "That's good. It will be nice to see them again."

We stared at each other for a moment before I sighed. "So are you gonna talk to me or what?"

"While I was unconscious I could hear your speaking to me." He said. "But, even though that were so, I couldn't wake up. It was actually very frustrating."

I sighed and leaned against the door to put some space between us. "Cas. Why won't you tell me what's going on? Will you at least tell me what you went through? Or, what you're going through now?"

"What do you want to know exactly?"

"Well... You remember what happened right? Before you took on Sams crap, you remember everything that happened in the past?"

His face went blank, and he turned and took a few steps away, and when he turned back to face me a second time he looked confused.

"Lara, did you know that they actually extract something from a beavers anal gland and use it as a sweetener in foods? Candy especially. If I were you, I don't think I would want to eat that candy."

Ok, he was clearly dodging my questions and using this crazy, yet incredibly disgusting, bit of information to distract me. Yeah, I wasn't stupid. As I've said a million times in the past I could read Castiel like a freakin book now, and I knew what he was doing. This was his way of completely avoiding everything that happened in the past. He felt guilty, and didn't want to acknowledge it. It was easier for him to fake lunacy then to actually talk about and confront all of the horrible things he'd done.

"Alrighty then." I said, pushing away from the door. "Then I guess I'll avoid candy from here on out."

He seemed relieved that I was allowing him to dodge the truth and instead focus on his supposed craziness. And, that's what I would do- Until he could finally face it head on and not want to run away and hide. Faking crazy was definitely much more simple then reality.

The rest of the day was... Unusual. In between moments of clarity Cas seemed as normal as he ever had been, but then of course there was the other 20 hours of the day that the things he spouted didn't make any sense at all. The mating rituals of insects and other animals seemed to be one of his favorite topics. That and of course how utterly intelligent honey bees happened to be. I merely nodded and listened to his ramblings because, actually, it was just nice to have him around again. Fake crazy or not.

He insisted on making my lunch, and my dinner- And even tried to cram desert down my throat but I was stuffed to the point of exploding. I dunno, I guess he felt that along with the fake crazy that he had to start doing other things to try and redeem himself somehow. How turning himself into my personal chef was going to accomplish that, I had no idea. But sometimes I couldn't understand how the angels mind worked.

That night I made him promise me nearly fifty times that he wouldn't disappear before I finally went to bed.

The next morning when I woke up, it didn't take me ten seconds to realize that Cas was gone. I tried not to freak out, thinking that he had just went back outside to visit his bee friends, but after glancing out the window and not seeing him, and searching the cabin from top to bottom- It was clear, he was gone.

"You've got to be kidding me?!" I shrieked. "Cas, where the hell are you?!"

I heard a flutter behind me, and Cas smirked. "I'm right here."

"Where the hell did you go?"

He rose up his hand which held a neatly wrapped package, fastened with a nice shiny bow and everything. "I brought you a gift."

How was he managing to completely make me fumble around like the village idiot?

"Uh, a what?" I asked.

"A gift." He moved closer and held it out to me. "Open it."

I honestly didn't know what to expect from him anymore, and I halfway figured there would be something ridiculous like a friggin beehive inside the package. But I took it anyhow and gave one of my mastered fake smiles before tugging the ribbon and taring the paper. Once I noticed what was inside, I arched both brows.

"Is that a pashmina?" Yes, yes I know. Big surprise that I actually knew what a pashmina was.

"I'm not sure if that's what you would call it, but yes. I made it myself." He answered.

"You _knitted _me a pashmina?" I pulled it out from the package, it was a pale green and way too nice of something for me to wear. I would only get the thing bloody.

"Yes, I used the most expensive cashmere I could find- And, I suppose I feel guilty for stealing it, but I figured it was for a good cause, because you don't have a pashmina and it was a nice color. I thought it would bring out your eyes."

Um... How was I supposed to respond to this? This was more than awkward, it was just... I didn't even know, which was why I didn't know how to respond.

"If you don't like it I could always make another in a different color. Or, maybe you'd like a hat or a sweater. Or a blanket?"

"No." I shook my head, smiling again. "This is... Really nice, Cas. Thank you. But you know, you don't have to give me gifts, or cook all of my meals and wash the dishes, or clean up around here. Just, ya know. Take a load off for a while. Let me do something."

He scrunched his brows and did his tilt head. "Why?"

"Honestly. Because it makes me uncomfortable. I'm not used to someone doing so much shit for me."

He only gave me a look that said I was crazy and of course he wasn't going to listen to me, and before I could object he was yet again making breakfast. And, just as the day before it was... Unusual. I couldn't help but ask myself exactly how long he was going to keep up with this charade- Because one of these days he was going to have to snap out of it long enough to start righting some wrongs. Yes, it was a big big start when he took on Sams mental breakdown, but there was much more that needed to be done. And really, I didn't even know how he would even begin to think of a way of fixing it. Who knows, maybe that's why he was content living in lala land, because whatever he would have to do to fix what he fucked up so badly in heaven and on earth- Was just too overwhelming to think about.

So, that night before I decided to go to bed, I took another quick shower, and while I had privacy for the moment- Texted Sam to find out where they were. I got no response naturally, because they were content with scaring the crap outa me. Even more so I vowed to kick the crap out of them when they got here.

After leaving the bathroom and stepping into the small bedroom upstairs, I honestly shouldn't have been surprised to see Cas sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Did you need something?" I asked.

"Lara can you answer a question for me?" He asked, and I felt my brows furrow at his tone. It wasn't what you would say was _crazy_, but more sullen and broken down.

"Um. Yeah, I can try. What is it?"

"I keep asking myself over and over again why it is that you've been here this entire time, why you've stayed with me and looked after me when I was unconscious, why you simply put up with me?" He looked up from the floor. "I don't deserve forgiveness, Lara. If anything, I deserve to have you hate me for the things I've done. So, why don't you?"

A sigh escaped me and I shook my head. "Everyone makes mistakes, Cas."

"No- Not like the ones I've made. Even had I never taken all of those lives, and never broken Sams wall- The things I said to you is reason enough to completely disown me. So, why haven't you?"

I sat down beside him and took his hand. "Cas. If you really don't know the answer to that by now then you really are crazy."

That flew right over his head and I wasn't surprised. He wasn't exactly observant.

"It's... So simple to just _try _to block it out. I try to keep my mind on other things. On you, on the meadow, or the chores I give myself. But it just won't go away, Lara. Everything I did is haunting me and I don't know how to make it stop."

"I know-" I squeezed his hand. "But, that's what happens during situations like this. And, I'm not gonna lie- There's a chance it might never go away. But the only thing you can do from here on out is do the right thing, and maybe, fix a little here and there if you can. But, punishing yourself isn't going to make what happened disappear, Cas. If anything, it will just make things worse."

Like a switch went off in his head, he suddenly sat up straight and said. "I think you should go to the meadow tomorrow."

"Uhh. Is that anything like sending someone to the cornfield?"

He only smirked and when I heard the door creak open downstairs, I jumped to my feet.

"Hey, Lara-" Dean called out. "Where you at?"

"They're here." I stated even though it was obvious. "You coming?"

He gave me his "of course" face and followed me from the bedroom and down the stairs. As soon as we hit the bottom I could see Sam lying a duffel bag on the table.

"Hey guys." I said, trying to shout with my eyes to go easy on Cas.

"Hey, kiddo." Sam put an arm around me and squeezed.

Everyones eyes fell onto the angel who was standing stiffly at the end of the staircase.

"Cas?" Dean stepped forward.

"Hello, Dean... Sam." He nodded to them.

"Hey, Cas." Sam smiled. "How are you doin?"

I arched a brow and waited for it, and he was of course never one to disappoint. He gave half a smile and stepped forward, stopping in front of Sam, then reached up and tapped the end of his nose saying a gruff "Boop".

"I would have prepared dinner for you had I known you were coming. But Lara didn't say when exactly you would be here, and of course I've been busy- There are a surprising amount of interesting animal programs on tv. Did you know that monkeys are one of many species that show homosexual tendencies?"

Deans mouth went agape and he looked at me with widened eyes. I only smiled at him in return.

"Uh, what?" He asked, just as I usually tended to do.

"Oh, I nearly forgot-" Cas' brows rose. "I have gifts for you as well."

He suddenly poofed away and I let out a groan.

"Dude, what the hell was that?" Dean asked.

"Welcome to the crazy train." I replied.

"What's wrong with him?" Sam asked now.

"I'll let you come to your own conclusions about that, bud."

Cas poofed back seconds later holding two more wrapped packages, he handed one to Dean and the other to Sam.

"More pashminas?" I asked, and Cas only shook his head at me.

"Of course not. You can't give the same gift to everyone, that's rude."

"Is this a joke?" Dean held the package awkwardly, shifting his eyes from me to Cas so quickly I thought he'd fall over.

"No, it's not." I said. "Don't be ungrateful, Dean. Open your present." I nudged Sam with my elbow. "You too."

"Uh... Yeah, ok." Sam shook it off and gingerly untied the ribbon and was careful not the rip the paper, Dean however tore at his until it was a shredded mess on the floor.

"Cas..." Dean looked up. "This is a pie?"

"That's right."

"You wrapped a pie?"

Cas' eyes went twirly again. "Isn't that what one tends to do when they give a gift, is wrap it?"

"Duh, Dean- What planet are you from?" I snickered, and he glared at me.

Sam held up what was in his package, and it was a plaid shirt. Practically identical to every single one he owned.

"Uh-" He snickered, unsure of what to think. "Thanks, Cas."

"Ok, well this was touching, and slightly scary-" Dean said sarcastically. "But, we gotta get down to business here." He moved to the duffel bad Sam lied down and pulled something wrapped in white cloth. "Cas, we need you to take a look at something we found."

"Of course." He moved closer and took the item from Deans hand and pulled the cloth free.

At a quick glance it looked like some sort of stone tablet with ancient looking hieroglyphs etched on it.

"You recognize that, Cas?" Sam asked.

"Yes-" Cas smiled, staring at the writing. "This is the handwriting of Metatron, he's the scribe of heaven." He held it up to the light and ran his index finger down the stone. "This explains how I woke up, it's the word of God."

"Word of God?" Dean nodded. "Ok, and can you read it?"

He shrugged and seared his eyes onto the symbols, his expression intense- He suddenly lit up and looked towards the three of us. "We should play a board game. Rufus has dozens stacked in a corner in the upstairs bedroom."

Dean closed his eyes and grumbled. "Cas, focus. Can you read that thing or not?"

"No, of course not. Only prophets can read the word of god, Dean. I'm clearly not a prophet."

Dean was going to blow his top any second. "Well, that's just great. We steal this hunk of crap from Dick Roman himself, and we have no way of friggin reading it."

Sam sighed. "And there's no way for you to find a way of maybe, I dunno, translating it somehow, Cas?"

"No, Sam. I'm sorry, I can't. I'm not a prophet. You should find a prophet." Cas smiled and held the stone back for Dean to take it.

"Ok, well- You would be the best one for that job, Cas? You know more about prophets than we do- Couldn't you zap on out there and find one?"

"Oh, no I can't do that, Dean. I'm not involved in wars anymore, and besides- Lara told me I can't zap away and I really don't want to make her angry."

"This doesn't have to be a war, Cas-" Dean went on. "But, think about it. Dick is still out there, and he wanted this tablet, which means it's important. We need someone to read it for us. Can't you just, ya know, give us a hand here?" He glared at me. "Lara, a little help here?"

"I'm not gonna force him to do something he doesn't wanna do, Dean." I shrugged.

He rolled his eyes and grabbed my wrist, dragging me across the room.

"Lara, he's bat shit crazy, and you're the only one he'll listen to."

"He's not crazy, Dean. This is just his way of avoiding what happened. Believe me, he has his moments and he knows what he's doing. But, something happened to him that we obviously don't understand. And if we force him into something, he might disappear and not come back."

"So," Dean shook his head. "He's faking?"

"I don't know, maybe. But you can't freak out on him."

He wasn't going to listen and stomped over to Cas. "Dude... Snap out of it, we need your help. The world is on the brink of destruction... Again. Because of what _you _did, now step your ass up and do something about it!"

Cas' face went blank. "I don't like a hostile environment." He said, then zapped away.

"Ugh." I took my head in my hands. "Dean, seriously? What did I just tell you? Go apologize!"

He held his arms up and looked around the room. "How? He's gone?"

"No he's not. He's probably in the field out back. Go talk to him, please."

He pointed his finger in my face. "You're going with me. Sam, you too. Let's go."

This was like an episode of I love Lucy, or at least felt like it. I honestly didn't think things could get any crazier. We left through the backdoor and slipped through a small grove of trees and to the open patch of land behind the cabin. It didn't take long to spot Cas- He was sitting on the ground in the center of the field cross legged and staring blankly off at nothing.

When we moved closer I noticed his attention was focused on a small ant hill in front of him.

"Uh, Cas..." Dean started awkwardly, swinging his hands in front of him. "You ok, dude?"

"Of course, Dean. I'm perfect." His tone said that should have been obvious.

"Right-" Dean rolled his eyes. "Well, look, I didn't mean to lose my cool in there, but... Ya get it, right?"

"Get what?"

"Why I was pissed off? This isn't a game, man- It's serious, people are dying. Bobby died, did you know that?"

Cas' brows furrowed and he looked up at me. "Lara, why didn't you tell me that Bobby was gone?"

"Honestly, I didn't think you could handle it." I answered truthfully. "I was worried."

He pulled himself to his feet, he was brandishing his naive little baby face.

"Isn't she amazing?" He said, smiling. "After everything that's happened, all of the things she's been through, she actually worries about myself- When there's nothing wrong with me."

Sam and Dean gave me discombobulated glances and I only shrugged.

"Yeah, she's friggin fantastic." Dean grumbled. "Look, Cas- Do you think we could maybe, talk? Alone?"

He shrugged and wouldn't stop smiling at me, and I ended up having to nudge him.

"Cas... Dean wants to talk to you." I said.

"Of course, Dean. We can talk." He sat back down in front of the ant hill.

Sam and I headed for the back door, and I glanced back long enough to see Dean fumbling around until finally sitting awkwardly on the ground in front of him.

Once we walked back into the cabin Sam let out a deep breath.

"Wow, uh... I'm not sure how to take all that." He said.

"Yeah, me either. I don't know if this is a faze he's going through, or if he's really lost it. I just hope he finally gets over this."

Sam stomped back towards the table but then abruptly stopped. "Wait a second.. Where is it?"

"Where's what?" I rushed beside him and stared at the blank tabletop. "Uh, the tablet's gone, dude?"

"I see that, Lara!"

We both noticed the front door hanging open, and we quickly rushed for it. Sam beat me outside first and started running in the direction I could see a small figure darting across the grass. I started running too, not even realizing that I didn't have on shoes. Whoever this person was was definitely wiry, and he nimbly avoided Sam's gigantic hands with a turn to the left. Sam skidded on his feet, losing his balance as the kid quickly changed directions a second time. I picked up my pace and flew past Sam and lunged at the kid and quickly tackled him to the ground.

He instantly started squealing in terror, apologizing over and over again.

I pulled myself to my feet as he cowered on the ground clutching the duffel bag in his arms.

"Who the hell are you?" Sam asked, as he finally caught up.

"Kevin Tran!" He huffed, practically in tears. "I'm in advanced placement!"

Sam and I looked at each other in confusion, before Sam pulled him back to his feet. He tried to grab the duffel bag from the kid, but his arms refused to let go. Sam jerked it once, then twice and finally three times and the kid started sobbing.

"I'm sorry!" He said. "I'm sorry but I can't let you take this! I don't know why, all I know is that I'm supposed to keep this and not let anyone touch it, I'm sorry!"

"Well this is great." I said, throwing up my arms. "One more mystery to add to the pile."

We dragged the kid back inside the cabin and shoved him on the sofa. Sam instantly splashed holy water and borax on his face, and he sputtered but didn't sizzle.

"What was that?!" He asked, shaking from fear.

"Just calm down. I was just checking you out." Sam answered. "You wanna tell me where the hell you came from?"

"Michigan... I stole my Moms car, don't ask me why. I don't know. But I somehow knew to drive here, for this." He hugged the bag tighter to his chest.

"Do you even know what's in that bag?" I asked.

He shook his head, forcing his hair to fall down into his eyes.

"Open it." Sam demanded. "Take a look then."

Kevin let his eyes dart from each of us before warily opening up the bag and pulling out the tablet. He squinted as he scaled over the mysterious writing and then his brows furrowed.

"What's a... Leviathan?" He asked.

Sam stood up straight. "Wait a second... You can read that?"

"Yeah, sorta, I mean it's kinda fuzzy, and it makes my head hurt... But yeah..."

I sat down on the coffee table in front of him. "What else does it say?"

"Uh... Hang on a second." He squinted at the writing again, running his fingers over it almost as though he were reading braille. "It says something like... I dunno, kind of like an in case of emergency note. In case these Leviathan were ever let loose."

Sams mouth went agape slightly. "What else?"

"Step away from the prophet!" A female voice suddenly shouted.

Sam and I both jumped and I flew to my feet. Two people, a man and a woman were standing just near the front door. Both were wearing business type suits, and even though I had no real way of knowing for certain somehow I just knew they were angels.

"Wait a second..." Sam rose his hands. "We aren't..."

The woman didn't let him finish that sentence before she flicked her finger and Sam went flying across the room, she then did the same to me and I crashed over the sofa and slammed down on the table.

"You Winchesters, constantly sticking your noses in where they don't belong!" She shouted, and I tried to roll off the table. "But not anymore, this is the end of that..." She looked to her partner. "Kill them."

An angel blade slid out of his coat sleeve and he didn't look as though he wanted to obey, but started towards me. He only stopped when Cas suddenly poofed in front of him. For a moment he actually stumbled backwards, as his eyes widened in surprise.

"Castiel?" He said. "You're alive?"

"Hello, Inias. It's so good to see you again." Cas said. "Hester... I understand you must be angry, but there isn't a need to be."

"No reason to be?!" She stomped forward and shoved Inias out of her way. "You went insane, returned to heaven and threatened to destroy everyone who didn't follow under you! Why? Why did you do something like that? What was that?!"

"Very inappropriate, and something that was completely unnecessary. But-" He rose both hands. "I'm sure I could make it up to you, I can't exactly offer an explanation, but perhaps there is something else I could do? A gift perhaps? Or, maybe there would be something else you would want?"

She shook her head, cringing the entire time. "You're insane, you are a disgrace to the entire garrison, to all of your siblings- To all of heaven! I don't understand how you're alive and standing in front of me, but I plan to end that."

She quickly backhanded Cas and sent him to his knees. He didn't even fight back as he sat there and took every single blow she inflicted on him. Sam and Dean were at a loss, not knowing how to stop her, and my angel blade was upstairs stuffed into my duffel bag. When I saw her bring out her own blade and raise it in the air, something in me snapped. Almost as if it was something I could do all along I stomped forward and grabbed her by the throat. An immense heat shot up my arm and illuminated my palm and spread past my hand and onto her skin. Within a matter of seconds her entire body suddenly burst into flames from the inside out and she shrieked in agony before being reduced to nothing but a pile of smoldering ashes.

Once she was dead, the heat and glow in my hand faded away as did what little energy I might have had left- But I had just enough to turn and face the angel called Inias, and he only stared at me wide eyed and petrified.

"Lara..." Deans voice was faint. "What... Did you just do?"

I couldn't answer that, because honestly- I wasn't even sure... I didn't even know how to do that, didn't even know I could, to my knowledge whatever abilities I might have possessed were still being blocked by the spell.

Cas pulled himself to his feet and took hold of my hand, which was now cold and clammy.

"Don't kill Inias, Lara." He said, his voice was calm despite having just witnessed what happened. "He isn't an enemy."

My response to that was completely blacking out, I barely felt myself thump to the floor before everything went silent.


	71. Chapter 71

When my eyes parted I could see sunlight yet again, and then a pair of blue eyes staring down at me. Cas' eyes. He gave a slight smile and nodded.

"Are you alright?" He asked.

I tried to sit up, but my head was pounding. "Uh... I think. What the hell happened?"

"You burned Hester, and then fainted from extinguishing all of your energy." It was funny how casual he sounded about that. "For a split second as it was happening, Lara- I could see your wings. All six of them. They were quite becoming."

"What?" My hands fell to my sides. "You saw my what?"

His brows scrunched. "Your wings of course. For that short instant the spell had dissolved to the point your abilities were brought forth, which in turn forced your wings to become to visible. At least, to myself and whatever celestial being might have been in the room. Hester, I don't think noticed them, since her eyeballs were currently being melted out of her skull." He smiled after that. "Are you hungry? I made breakfast."

"Uh, no!" I snapped back, and he was unaffected by my tone. "Seriously, what the hell?!"

"It's fine, Lara. You're fine now. The spell is back in place, your powers are dormant again."

"But still!" I flew to my feet, and had a dizzy spell. I then glanced around the empty cabin. "Where's Sam and Dean?"

"In the basement with the prophet. Inias agreed to let him remain here while he translates the tablet. He's also going to make certain that no other angels come to this place." He motioned towards the table. "Breakfast?"

I wanted to throw up... I barely remembered frying that angel extra crispy, or even how I had done it. It was just instinct, as though it was something I knew all along. For a moment I stared down at the hand that had done it, wondering how in the world it even happened at all. This was horrifying... The spell wasn't supposed to dissolve so soon! Lee told me I had five years at best, it hadn't even been two years, how... No... No, I couldn't think about this. If I did I would puke and then run screaming from the cabin. Instead, I bit back tears and looked up at Cas as finally the smile he carried faded once he noticed the watery state of my eyes.

"It's alright, Lara." He said, reaching over and pulling me into a hug. "Everything is fine now."

"That's easy for you to say." I sniffed. "This can't be happening."

I suddenly realized that this was the first time I had actually hugged him since he came back. I didn't get the chance before he fixed Sammy, and after that he had been on his loopy fest. It felt good, and I took advantage of it because I knew that if Cas was actually back to normal then something like this wouldn't happen. I could count the times I'd hugged him on one hand, it just wasn't in his nature. He was an angel, not a normal guy, so things like this were foreign and unusual to him. I dunno, maybe he was taking advantage of his fake crazy right now too, because he refused to let go. He only loosened his grip slightly when Dean cleared his throat from behind us. I pulled my face out of his shoulder and took a glance at Dean as he arched his brows at us, but surprising enough he didn't make a dirty comment.

He only turned away and walked into the kitchen and Cas finally lowered his arms to his sides.

"Lara can I talk to you for a minute?" Dean asked, standing at the sink.

I let out a sigh, knowing already what this was about and left Cas standing by the sofa as I moved into the kitchen area.

"Yeah, Dean. Just get it over with." I said.

He eyed me for a moment and I waited for him to blow up at me. "Are you ok?" He asked instead.

"Uh..." I shifted slightly. "I suppose, why?"

"Oh, no reason. It's not like you nuked an angel last night with your bare hand or nothin." He shrugged. "Nope, everything's completely normal."

"Dean, I don't even know how that happened. It was like a switch went off inside of me, I acted on instinct alone."

"Yeah, and that can't be good, kid. What if it happens again, only... You're not in as much control, huh?"

I leaned against the counter. "What am I supposed to do? I can't help it, it's not my fault. What, do you wanna lock me in the basement or something?"

"No, you can't do that, Dean." Cas suddenly said, appearing beside us. "If you try I'll take her and leave."

Dean sighed and rubbed his forehead. "I'm not gonna lock her up, Cas. Calm down."

"I'm perfectly calm, Dean." He then turned and pulled me towards the table. "Now eat your breakfast before it gets cold."

Dean joined me at the table, although somewhat wary of what Cas might say when he continued this topic.

"So, uh..." He glanced over to Cas quickly. "Are you feeling all nukey right now?"

"Her abilities are dormant again." Cas answered for me. "I know that because clearly, her wings aren't visible. If they were, they would take up the entirety of this room, which of course could be an inconvenience because..."

"Wait a second." Dean looked like I felt once hearing that. "So you could actually see them last night?"

"Of course."

"For how long?"

Cas shrugged, his eyes going twirly again. "Only a few seconds. You wouldn't have been able to see them because you're not a celestial being, and there are very few humans that could actually see them without their insides liquifying. I don't think that would be very pleasant."

"Can we change the subject please?" I asked. "What's going on with this so called prophet?"

"He's translating the tablet, slowly..." Dean groaned. "But, so far, from what we can tell- Seems as though it might be a way to take down Dick."

I perked up. "Finally, what do we got so far?"

"Not much. It's gonna take him a couple days I think to get through it all." He sighed and started for the basement stairs. "Guess I should head on back down."

Once he was gone Cas sat across from me at the table and the smile had returned.

"So, how are you feeling, Cas?" I asked, even though I knew he would lie with his answer.

"I'm fine, Lara. You don't have to worry about me."

"Yeah... That's a little hard-" I sighed and took a sip of coffee. "Guess I'm afraid I'll lose you again."

He gave a small smirk. "And neither the angels in Heaven above, Nor the demons down under the sea can ever dissever my soul from the soul of..."

My brows arched and I interrupted him. "Um, what?"

"It's from a poem, have you never read it?"

I tried to blink away the confusion. "Uh, no. I haven't."

I went silent waiting for him to explain but he only smirked and apparently felt that was explanation enough, then pointed to my plate. "I think it's cold now."

* * *

I stood with my arms crossed warily watching the angel Inias chatting quietly with Cas across the cabin. I was prepared for him to suddenly turn on him just as Hester had done, which meant I was prepared for an angel blade to suddenly flash in the light. Just in case that happened, I had my own tucked into the waist of my jeans. Cas had seen it minutes ago, and only glanced at it with a halfhearted expression. He tried to convince me that Inias could be trusted, that he wasn't like Hester or the others that wanted to kill him, but I wasn't taking any chances.

Kevin had translated the tablet, it took three painstaking days and I actually felt sorry for the poor kid. He was scared out of his mind the entire time, and freaking out because seriously, who the hell would want to be a prophet? But, now it was done, and Inias claimed he was going to send him home to his Mother, where they would watch out for him.

He stood with the tablet clenched to his chest, as two angels stood on either side of him. I didn't know their names, but Cas seemed to trust them as well and had no issues with letting them take Kevin.

"Thanks a lot, kid." Dean said. "You did a good job."

Kevin only shook his head slightly. "Yeah, well. I guess that's my job now, huh?"

"Afraid so." Sam replied. "But don't worry, the angels have your back. They'll take care of you."

Inias moved back into the living room and nodded to the two angels. "Return the prophet home to his Mother, but stay near at all times."

They nodded and after a small smile from Kevin they zapped him away. Somehow... I had a feeling that we would be seeing him again later on down the road.

"What are you going to do now, Castiel?" Inias asked. "Is there a way I can convince you to return to the garrison?"

Cas passed a glance to me, then shook his head. "No. I'm sorry, Inias- But I don't belong there anymore."

Inias as well glanced at me, and I expected to see anger etched into his features but he actually looked pretty damn calm. "I understand. I see for myself that the rumors are true. The last Seraphim has chosen you as a Guardian. You wear the brand well."

Cas gave his newly acquired bashful smirk, and with a goodbye Inias disappeared with a flutter.

"Ok, so-" Dean said, interrupting the awkward moment. "Let's see what Kevin wrote down, huh?"

Sam flipped open a notebook that was full from front to back. Since it was gonna take a while to read through all the pages I went to making everyone some lunch- Before Cas could actually nominate himself to do it. He'd been waiting on all of us hand and foot for days, and it was about damn time that he just sat down and took a break.

I started going through the cabinets and pulling out a loaf of bread and some deli meat from the fridge. Sandwiches were as good as it was gonna get right now, but I honestly didn't think Sam or Dean cared. Nothing mattered right now but reading what Kevin had written.

"Come to think of it-" I said randomly. "Seeing is that I've been somewhat busy lately, what with being here in the cabin with Cas, and after turning Hester into Shake 'n Bake, how exactly did you guys find that tablet anyhow?"

Dean and Sam peered up at me, and Dean shrugged. "Charlie- She figured out what was goin on on that hard drive, and the numbers Bobby gave us were coordinates to some field in Wisconsin."

He returned his attention to the notebook and I held out my arms. "Uh, and?"

"And..." He shrugged. "Dick is basically gonna turn all humans into ground hamburger, we're their food. So, there's gonna be places built all over the friggin world where they'll herd us like cattle."

Cas had gone silent as he stood awkwardly at the edge of the sink, he kept his eyes fixed on the floor.

"Ok, and now the tablet story?" I went on.

"Dick was funding archaeological digs-" Sam answered. "Charlie hacked his email and found out that they'd found something in Iran, whatever it was Dick was eager and excited to get his hands on it... We just made sure we got it before he did."

"Well, seeing is that this tablet is about leviathan I suppose that makes sense." I sighed and finished with the sandwiches. "And I'll bet he wasn't very happy to know that you guys outsmarted him... Or well, Charlie did."

Dean scowled at me. "I wouldn't go that far."

"Uh, she kinda saved all our asses, Dean. If she hadn't of been there to tinker with the hard drive then we would basically be no where." I lied their plates down on the table. "You can't argue with that."

Sam gave a coy little smirk. "She's kinda right, Dean. If it weren't for Charlie... Yeah... You get it."

"Well I'd send her a muffin basket as a thank you-" Dean replied sarcastically. "But she told us from here on out we won't be able to contact her anymore. She's going off the grid."

"Yeah I don't blame her, since we almost got her killed." I sat down at the table and had no interest in my own sandwich.

"Guys-" Sam said, sitting up. "Check this out... I found it."

We crowded around him, all but Cas who remained standing by the sink.

"It says that the only way to kill a leviathan is with a bone of a righteous mortal washed in the three bloods of the fallen." His eyes trailed over to Cas. "First is the blood of a fallen angel."

Now we all looked over at him and he rose his head long enough to give a small smile.

"Well, you know me-" He said. "It wouldn't be the first I've bled for the Winchesters."

He moved over to the table and out of no where a small glass bottle appeared in his hand and filled with blood. He then handed it to Dean who stared at it with a questionable expression.

"Cas..." He said. "You know we're gonna need your help with this, right?"

Cas only shook his head. "Oh, I don't fight anymore, Dean."

"Well, you gotta with this one. We can't do it alone. This is leviathan we're talkin about here... These things were brought here because of what you did. You gotta fix it."

"I'm sorry, but I refuse to take part in anything with violence anymore."

I quickly glared at Dean, hoping he would take the hint and drop it for now. Lecturing Cas or getting angry wasn't going to help the situation, he would only freak out and blip away, or slip back into crazy land. But, thankfully Dean did read my expression and didn't say anything more on the matter. But I knew what he was thinking, he was wanting me to try and convince Cas to help us out. Which, I don't know, I might have been able to- But I wasn't sure if I wanted to try. I had just gotten him back, I didn't want to lose him again.

"Ok, well-" He went on. "We got the first blood. Whose is next?"

"Uh..." Sam flicked the pages. "From what I can tell, the second is the blood of the Father of fallen beasts, the third of the ruler of fallen humanity."

"Great, and that means who exactly?" I asked.

"Fallen humanity, I would think... Would be Crowley... King of Hell, kind of fits the description." Sam shrugged. "The other..."

"An alpha." Cas said. "A father of fallen beasts would be the beginning of a race. An alpha."

Dean grumbled and pushed his untouched sandwich aside. "Awesome. Not like that'll be easy or nothin."

"First thing's first-" Sam said, standing. "We should call Crowley, get him stuck in a devils trap. _Persuade _him into giving us his blood."

"If persuade means beating the crap out of him until he's _choking _on his own blood, sounds good to me." I said. "Because I seriously don't think he'll give it to us willingly. Also, if we're gonna track down an alpha, I think he might be the best person to help us out with that." I glanced to Cas warily. "Seeing is that he had an overabundant supply trapped not so long ago."

Cas flinched slightly, and retreated to the coffee table where he flicked on the tv and yet again started watching another animal program. Dean shook his head and motioned for me to follow him outside. I did reluctantly, already knowing what he was going to say. Once we were standing by the cars parked a good distance away from the cabin he let out a sigh.

"You gotta do something about this, kid-" He said. "Talk to him. Convince him that he needs to help us out here."

I chewed the inside of my cheek to keep from snapping at him. Little did he or Sam know, I didn't want to convince Cas to do it. Maybe it was being selfish of me, but I just couldn't take the risk of him disappearing again or something even worse than that. I'd tried for the months I thought Cas was dead to act normally, to pretend that it didn't affect me as much as it had, but of course it was a lie. The thought of maybe having to go through that again...

"I don't know, Dean-" I finally spoke. "It might not be a good idea."

"Why exactly?" He slapped me in the arm with the back of his hand. "You need to snap outa it. Stop babying him. This is his mess, he started it, and he needs to end it."

"I just don't know if he really can, I mean... I'm pretty sure he's faking in a way, ya know- To just block out everything that happened, but- What if I'm wrong? What if he's not really back completely and we send him out into this dangerous mission and it gets him killed?"

"Ok," He shrugged. "I'm just gonna flat out say it, cupcake. Even though it weirds me out to think about it, I'll admit it. You..." He cringed. "Love the guy, I get it. Fine, whatever- But people are dying, and it's gonna stay that way until we take Dick out."

I scowled at him. "Stop it-" I held up my hand. "Just, stop talking, seriously. You're not a friggin therapist so stop head shrinking me. I get it, and I'll talk to him... Just, don't ever say _that_ again."

He only gaped at me and I turned and walked back into the cabin. When Dean entered next, he muttered something about he and Sammy going out for a supply run- Because they didn't have everything needed to summon Crowley. I knew that was a lie, we had everything in the trunk of the friggin car, no- This was their way of telling me to talk to Cas- To try and get him to help us out.

I watched them leave the cabin, and waited until the engine was faint in the distance before I flopped down on the sofa and stared at Cas' back. His eyes were transfixed on the tv, but his posture was stiff- Which told me he wasn't really focusing on what was playing on the screen.

"Cas." I said. "You ok?"

He glanced back at me. "Of course."

I patted the spot next to me on the couch. "Come here, come sit by me." He quickly obliged and sat beside me on the couch. "Ok, so. You're gonna talk to me now. And there's not gonna be any dodging my questions with crazy babble, you're gonna be honest with me, ok?"

A quiet sigh escaped him and he nodded faintly. "Alright."

"I think you know that play time's over. It's easy to think that you can just ignore everything by sitting here in this cabin with me, or by running around doing chores, cooking, cleaning and wandering in the meadow out back. But you can't do it anymore, because when we get a lead on where an Alpha might be, I'm going with Sam and Dean to help. And you're coming with me."

His lips cinched slightly. "Why do you have to go as well?"

"Because it's the right thing to do. I'm not gonna sit back on my ass while my brothers are out there doing something so dangerous. Now, I can't force you to fight, I know that... And believe it or not, I actually don't even want to ask you to do it, but you know Dean's right... Don't you?"

He let his eyes trail off towards the tv, and I quickly flicked it off.

"I can't, Lara. It's not as though I don't want to help, of course I do- But I can't... I'll only fail again and cause more pain."

I turned and sat on my knees, giving him my full attention. "No you won't- Because, deep down, you're still the same Cas you've always been. Which means you don't want anything to happen to your friends. I want you to be honest with me... All of this-" I pointed around the cabin. "The way you've been acting since you woke up, it's not real... Is it?"

He looked at me and shrugged. "There's a part of me that wishes it were real. Because how simple would it be to completely ignore everything, if I had lost my mind. So I suppose in answer to your question, Lara- No, it wasn't real, at least not all of it. But I will admit that I do feel as though taking in Sams torture has actually helped me. It set things into perspective, made me reflect on everything I've done wrong. I know now that taking on Sams burden was the beginning of my penance."

"Penance?"

He nodded. "I need to atone for my crimes, Lara."

For some odd reason that forced a knot to appear in my throat, which I quickly tried to swallow. "And, how else do you plan to do that?"

"That's what I was trying to understand myself, and then... Suddenly I realized that I had been ignoring the one thing that had to have been caused by fate alone-" He smiled slightly. "You... For whatever reason it happened I'm meant to protect you. Perhaps it was God, I honestly have no idea, but... Making certain that nothing happens to you again, is going to be my redemption."

"Cas... That's nice and all, but... I'm not the only one that you need to worry about."

"Sam and Dean are angry with me, of course I don't blame them I deserve to be hated. They wouldn't be as willing to accept me back as you would. Even that I struggle to understand, Dean and yourself are very similar in personality- I would assume that you would be as disgusted with me as Dean happens to be."

I smacked him on the arm slightly. "Ok, yeah- Dean might be pissed at you but he doesn't hate you. He's just waiting for you to step up and help us out."

"Because all of this is my fault-" He sighed. "I suppose it's only right if I fix it."

He obviously noticed the sullen look on my face, it would be hard to miss. Yeah, I knew Cas had been over embellishing his "crazy", and I knew it was the right thing to do for him to actually help us out, but still...

"Lara?" He shifted slightly until he was facing me. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing-" I faked a smile. "I'm fine."

"No you're not." His brows scrunched. "You can tell me."

But how? How would I explain something that even I couldn't fully understand? That for months and months I considered Cas to be my friend, and during that entire time whatever else might have been brewing beneath the surface was completely ignored or shoved aside? And now that I was finally allowing myself to come to terms with it being more than just friendship for me, he could go out and get himself killed by leviathan? How stupid was it of me to allow myself to acknowledge something when more then likely, he couldn't feel the same way. He was an angel, a creature created specifically for obedience- Dean had claimed that they didn't experience emotions like a normal person.

I halfway wanted to punch my brothers for ever announcing so long ago that Cas "liked" me. Before then I was living in ignorance, I honestly had no clue. But then they had to go and put that thought in my head, and practically slap me in the face with it. What the hell was I supposed to do now? I was fine before, perfectly fine, but definitely not now.

"Do you ever..." I started, trying to find the right way to phrase it. "Do you ever sit and think about how things might have ended up, Cas- If I had never been brought back?"

His face went blank. "What do you mean?"

"After I died, what if I had never come back? What if Lee flipped me the bird and said screw you, I'm not sending you back- And with no other way of being resurrected, I would have never come back... What would have happened?"

I watched his eyes go shifty, and really it was the first time in a while that he did it out of confusion and not wanting to answer, instead of faking lunacy.

"What would have happened..." He swallowed once over.

"I guess I should be more specific. I meant, what would have happened with you? What would you have done?"

Now his expression turned completely serious. "If I couldn't have found a way to bring you back, I have no doubts that I myself would be dead right now. I would have allowed Raphael to kill me."

"Why?"

"Because that is one failure that I wouldn't have been able to tolerate."

I sighed and rested my head on the back of the couch. "Why am I so much more important?"

"I don't know... But you are."

Well at least we were on the same level of understanding, cause I sure as hell didn't know why he was so much more important either. Seriously, we were both clueless idiots.


	72. Chapter 72

It wasn't long after Sam and Dean returned that they got a devils trap ready and summoned Crowley. It took a good couple minutes actually for him to appear as opposed to it being instantaneously. But when he did, and he stared down at the devils trap he was stuck in he let out a gruff sigh.

"Well, boys- I see that for whatever reason I'm here obviously isn't to deal."

"Precaution-" Dean said. "We need to have a little talk."

"Does this have anything to do with what I've been hearing through the chatter? You know, of you idiots finding the leviathan tablet?" Judging by our expressions he knew what we were thinking. "I knew it was only a matter of time before you turned to old Crowley again for help. Really, you boys get caught with your pants down more than anyone I've seen."

Sam let out a sigh. "So, you know then? Does that mean you're not gonna cooperate?"

Crowley smiled. "Of course I want to cooperate. I want those nasty little buggers disposed of just as much as you lot. Please, by all means- Kill them all, starting with Dick Roman."

"Uh," I fumbled. "Why?"

"Why?" He rolled his eyes. "You're not a very bright girl there, kitten. Isn't it obvious?"

"Of course it's obvious to us. But you're a demon and could care less about the fate of the world."

He wagged a finger at me. "Not necessarily true. If the leviathan are busy eating all of you then who would be left to make deals? No one, and besides- Leviathan aren't exactly friendly to my kind. Dick has expressed a strong disliking for myself."

"Least he got one thing right-" Dean sneered. "Ok, so you know why it is you're here. So, you know what it is we want from you?"

"My blood?" Crowley arched his brows. "Yes, of course I know all that and I'll gladly give it to you, but-" He rose a finger. "Not yet. First things first you need to get a hold of an alphas, and they're a little more difficult to come by. You get it without having your faces eaten, and my blood is yours."

"Why not just give it to us now?" Sam asked.

"Insurance, moose- Insurance. Look at me- I'm in a devils trap, I give you the blood you kill me, which doesn't exactly tickle my fancy."

"Or," Dean said taking a step forward. "We kill you anyways and take your blood after you're in pieces?"

"Really, you are always so violent, darling. But if you kill me, I won't tell you where an alpha is. And you're still just as buggered. Now, you let me go I'll tell you where he is and once he's dead, presumably- My blood is yours."

We exchanged glances and I warily checked every corner of the cabin to make sure Cas hadn't poofed back. We all agreed that it might not be the best idea for him to be present when we summoned the King of Hell, for obvious reasons. Those reasons being Crowley wanted to rip Cas' heart out.

Dean pursed his lips and approached the devils trap- Then pulled his knife and scratched a line through it. Crowley only smirked as he stepped out.

"There's a good boy." He said. "Now, as far as the alpha goes. He's in Charlotte North Carolina. I'll sext you the address after I've left. I would advise stocking up on dead mans blood- Because all his vampy goodness shouldn't be very happy to see you." He gave a little wave. "Summon me after if you aren't vampire chow."

He disappeared and I let out a sigh. "Alpha vamp... Goodie."

"You think he's lying?" Sam asked.

"With Crowley you never know." Dean answered. "But did you see the look on his face when he was talkin about Dick? Pretty sure he wasn't fakin the hate."

"Yeah, ok-" Sam sighed. "Guess we should pack up. You gonna call Cas back, kiddo?"

I nodded and watched as they started readying our things. "Cas, you can come back now." I said.

It wasn't three seconds before I heard his flutter of wings and he gave me half a smile. "Did it go as planned?"

"More or less-" I glanced at him. "So, where'd you disappear to?"

"The Great Wall of China. I thought that would have been far enough for Crowley not to sense me."

I snickered and started packing my own things. "Yeah probably."

"What's going on? Why is everyone packing?" He asked.

Dean stopped after zipping his bag closed. "Got a location for big daddy vamp. So, we're goin after him."

Cas immediately started fumbling. "Is that wise? He's not to be underestimated, Dean."

"No I know that. Dude's a dick and really ain't gonna be happy to see me and Sammy. But hey, we got no choice."

"So... You've met this guy before?" I asked.

"Yeah," Sam didn't look happy about that. "It was before you came back, and before... Well, uh- Before I got my soul back."

My face fell flat. "Oh, gotcha."

My brothers didn't like to talk about the time I was dead and the months Sammy was traipsing around without a soul. But they had mentioned that for a short time they were pretty much just forced into working for Crowley. Blackmailed is more like it I guess. Crowley claimed he could get Sams soul back from the cage but only if they agreed to help him round up some pretty dangerous monsters. Alphas just so happened to be among the list. Naturally Crowley had been full of bullshit and actually didn't have the juice to retrieve Sams soul, so basically he was just fucking with my brothers. All the more why I wanted to murder this guy.

Of course this was before they knew that Cas was as well working for Crowley, but that was irrelevant. That was in the past and I'd rather not think about that again.

Cas wasn't happy obviously about me insisting in partaking in this endeavor and tried to talk me out of it. But I didn't listen. I wasn't about to allow Sam and Dean to go up against an Alpha vamp alone, one that clearly hated my brothers with a passion and wanted to eat them.

Once everything was packed up and everyone was ready to go I turned to Cas and shrugged.

"So are you coming with us?"

He stared at the door like it was a passage of no return. Out there was the real world, real danger and problems that he had no desire to run back in to.

"Of course." He finally answered. "I'll try my best."

"If you're not ready... You don't have to."

For a moment I actually thought he might stay behind, but he shook his head. "No. I'll come, although I'm not promising I will be of much assistance."

"You could always just sit in the car." I shrugged. "But we'll talk about that when we get there."

* * *

For a very brief moment it felt like everything was back to normal. My brothers in the front seat, Cas and I in the back- Driving off to do a job. But then of course, that would fade away once Cas would make an observation of something that held absolutely no relevance to anything. The fake crazy was leaving, but every once in a while it seemed he felt he had to keep up with it. Maybe it was his way of ignoring what we were going to do. The majority of the time he was silent, but then of course he would comment on the speed of light and sound, honey bees and how useful they were to the planet- Because, comon, they pollinate and give us delicious honey, right? Sam took the psycho babble with a grain of salt, Dean was just getting pissed off. Me? I honestly didn't know what to think. I was getting used to his random statements by now. Besides, he had confessed to me that it was pretty much all a show anyhow.

This job was unusual, it didn't go at all as planned- And I was in a daze for most of it. I kept trying to tell myself that this wasn't going to screw up, we were gonna get this vamps blood- More then likely gank him while we were at it, and then return to Rufus' cabin unscathed. But of course, when did anything like that ever happen?

Big Daddy vamp was hauled up in a pretty nice place. A "mansion" if you wanted to call it that that just fell short of being a palace. Everything was smothered in antiques that seemed to date back to biblical times. Seriously, how old was this dude? Sam had the ingenious thought of instead of going in guns, or rather, machetes blazing- That we would try to actually talk to the guy peacefully. Yeah, Sammy was an awesome hunter, but sometimes I had to side with Dean. But we did it his way, and strolled into the house with our hands in the air. Cas was invisible mostly, claiming that he would watch from the sidelines and intervene if things turned bloody. I could still see him, which honestly, I don't think he was aware of. Sam and Dean kept giving subtle glances in all directions, so they couldn't. I was beginning to wonder if maybe the reason why I could still see him was because of what had happened not two days ago.

I baked Hester, and for that split second my spell was basically caput. Maybe it was still on the fritz, which meant that I was able to see Cas when he was playing hide and seek? It was also pretty much a dead give away when for a fleeting fraction of a second I could see his true face.

It was blindingly bright, to the point where I almost looked away- But not enough to completely burn my eyes out of my skull. I would fail a million times over in describing what it actually looked like. I suppose the best way to put it would be to imagine the most beautiful marble statue you have ever seen, something that was just too perfect to be considered real, surrounded and consumed by pure light and energy. And don't get me started on his wings, seriously, how the frack did he walk around with those things without knocking shit off of tables and shelves?

But he was supposed to be invisible, and I kept getting sidetracked and distracted by the fleeting moments of brightness coming from the corner.

Basically, when I could hear what was happening in front of me, the Alpha vamp wasn't pleased to see us- But that wasn't surprising. He made threats of eating us, all the while Sam and Dean tried to get him to understand that we weren't the threats- It was the leviathan that he needed to worry about. Because naturally, if the leviathan were eating humans, there wouldn't be anything left for the vampire race. And seeing is that leviathans weren't exactly the type for negotiating, every other monster roaming the earth would be screwed.

"You try to convince me of that-" The man said, his deep voice was enough to chill me clear through. "But I find it funny, how not two months ago I sat down with Mr. Roman and we discussed this very thing. And do you know what he told me? That we could all live together amicably. There was no reason to believe he would have been lying."

Dean fidgeted. "Look, he wouldn't tell you that flat out to your face."

"We've seen _everything _Dick Roman plans to do-" Sam went on. "And you know what was at the top of the list just underneath his human cattle farms?" He stood tall. "_You_, and every other monster out there... He wants to wipe you _all _out. Nuke the competition."

Daddy vamp smiled and tapped his long fingernails on a silver chalice. "And you expect me to believe that suddenly you want to save me and my kind?"

"No-" Dean shook his head. "But at least we're bein honest here. You're makin a mistake, man. Dick doesn't want to live with other monsters, he wants to ice them and you're at the top of the list."

We fell silent when another vampire entered the room and whispered something to the man seated across the long table. He smiled slightly once he heard the message.

"Please, send him in- It should be interesting to hear what he has to say." He then stood. "It might not please you to hear but Mr. Romans right hand man is here. He comes every now and then and we discuss business."

"Hey, whoa-" Dean rose his hands. "If you know what's good for you then you'll grab some borax and just slice that head off his shoulders."

Daddy vamp looked to his comrade. "Take them to the study, I'll talk to Edgar alone, thank you." Dean and Sam both tried to voice their objections but he only rose a finger. "You will come to find that you don't live as long as I have by blind faith alone. Sometimes, occasionally, you have to a dig a little deeper and go about it a little more tactfully than simply hacking and slicing your way through."

I had remained silent through the entire conversation because on most occasions I tended to piss people off, or make them even more so want to eat us. But as we left all three of us tried to persuade the man into not taking this leviathan lightly.

The response we got to that was being shoved into a study and having the door locked behind us. Dean immediately started cursing, Sam tried to open the doors which wouldn't budge, and I couldn't take my eyes off of the empty blood bags, and full ones in a cooler.

"Awesome, now what?" Dean huffed. "That dumb-ass isn't gonna listen and is gonna get himself friggin eaten before we get the chance to bleed him."

"Where's Cas?" I asked, spinning a circle noticing he hadn't followed us to the study. "Cas?" I whispered. "Where the hell are you?"

No response, he didn't join us.

"We need to get out of here, now." Sam stated, even though it was completely obvious. "But they took all our weapons and lock picks."

Dean smirked slightly. "Not all our weapons-" He reached down under his pant leg and retrieved a syringe filled with dead mans blood. "Got this at least."

"Cas, seriously... Where the hell did you..." My words cut off when I heard the lock on the door click, and the door itself slowly swung open on its own accord. "Ok, never mind."

Apparently Castiel hadn't completely ditched us, thankfully- He was still lucid enough to let us out of the study. When we sneaked out, naturally my eyes scaled every inch of the place for him, but I didn't see him, or the brightness caused from the seconds of his true form being exposed.

Dean and Sam led the way through the halls and slowly back towards the dining room where we left the alpha. When we rounded the corner to another hallway we were jumped by one of his guards but Dean plunged the syringe into his neck and he went down like a sack of potatoes. Sam searched his jacket for a weapon, pulling out a long handled hunting knife which he brandished like a trophy.

This place was like a frickin labyrinth, and when we finally came back to the entrance of the dining room we just barely managed to hear an argument between the alpha vamp and the leviathan, and after a quick peak around the corner I felt my eyes go wide. I recognized this guy and if I was remembering correctly, it was the one that had a friggin car dropped on him at Bobbys. Ok, well... Apparently they were immune to vehicles flattening them into pancakes, which wasn't all that surprising.

My attention was broke when the alpha vamp was suddenly bitch slapped and flew across the dining room table. Sam charged soon after and with a quick swipe of the hunters knife his head went flying. Dean was quick to kick the head away and I watched it roll across the floor and thump against the wall.

"I take it talkin to the guy didn't go as planned?" Dean asked sarcastically.

It would be nice if I had a name for the frickin alpha, but it wasn't known to me, and honestly I don't think my brothers knew it either. But, he slid off the table and wiped the blood from his split lip.

"For once-" He spoke. "I'm inclined to agree with you. Dick Roman has no intention of honoring his end of the bargain."

He sat back at the table and we watched as he grabbed an empty chalice, cut a gash in his wrist with one of this claws and a thick stream of blood began to drip down into it. No one spoke as he filled it up more than half way before stopping and holding it in the air.

"You wanted my blood-" He said, his eyes narrowed. "Take it and go."

Dean and Sam were of course skeptical.

"Just like that?" Dean asked.

"No-" He scowled. "Not just like that. I'm giving this to you as repayment for knocking that leviathans head off his shoulders. So if you want it, take it. For the moment we're on the same side. Kill Dick Roman, so things can return to the natural order of things." He shrugged. "Afterwards, we can go back to killing each other if that's what you want."

Sam hesitantly reached over and took the chalice from his hands.

"Leave now." He demanded.

We awkwardly headed towards the exit, and Sam was careful to not spill any blood from the cup. The entire trek back to the car I kept glancing over my shoulder to make sure we weren't going to get jumped.

When I climbed back in the car I arched a brow seeing Cas already sitting in the backseat.

"Thanks for unlocking the study door." I said. "But, uh... Why are you out here hiding?"

He cocked his head to the side. "Leviathan can kill angels, he would have sensed me there had I lingered behind."

Dean shifted in the front seat to look at us. "Leviathan can kill angels?" He sighed. "Well, that's just awesome."


	73. Chapter 73

The days spent afterwards were trying to find the correct bone for this leviathan slaying weapon. Turns out that it's really not that simple to locate a bone of a truly righteous saint. There's always some little dirty secret this so called religious fanatic had, but we ended up finally finding a former Nun that had spent her entire life serving God. And after Dean so eloquently phrased it "Let's bone this Nun" We had the third piece to our weapon.

Now all we needed was the final which of course was probably going to be the most difficult. Crowley wasn't a very cooperate little scamp now was he?

We returned to the cabin and after asking Cas repeatedly to take a little trip so we could summon the ass-hat, he finally decided to break down and admit that he had been up to something.

"First let me make it clear that I try my best to take no part in violent altercations anymore." He started. "But I started thinking after we had retrieved the alphas blood that perhaps it would be best if I tuned back into angel radio."

Dean actually looked a little stunned. "And?"

Cas sighed. "And I heard nothing from them. They were completely silent, at least my old garrison. While you were sleeping last night I made a trip to the prophets home and discovered he was missing. Remember, I told you that leviathan can kill angels."

I flopped down at the table. "So, you're saying leviathans ganked the angels babysitting Kevin and then took him?"

He nodded sadly. "That's my speculation, yes."

"Awesome-" Dean ran his hand down his face. "Ok then. I guess that means we gotta get Crowley here asap. We need to end this once and for all. That kid didn't ask to be brought into this crap- We gotta help him out."

"If he's even still alive." Sam sighed.

"If he were dead then another prophet would have emerged to take his place-" Cas retorted. "I've heard nothing of the sort. Of course that could very well be because the angels are dead as well and I..."

"Yeah ok-" I jumped to my feet and interrupted him. "Cas, you need to take a hike so we can call Crowley up."

"That's not really necessary." Crowley suddenly said across the room. "Castiel, well now look at you. For a dead angel you're certainly looking... Well, very much alive." He scowled bitterly towards Sam and Dean. "What is this? I come to help you end Dick and come to find out that you're harboring the one angel in creation that I've most wanted to get my hands on?"

Dean pursed his lips. "Look we don't really got the time for you to bitch slap all your old grudges, so can we just move this show along?"

"Well, that's gratitude for you." Crowley slipped his hands in his pockets. "I would have come sooner but I'll let you ladies guess who summoned me into a devils trap?" He snickered when our faces went blank. "That's right. Dick Roman himself. Turns out he's got a little prophet stashed away which means he knows what you're planning."

Sam shoulders tensed. "And you're telling us this why?"

Crowley pulled a hand from his pocket and waved a vile of blood in the air. "He wanted to make a deal, he offered me something that was actually very hard to turn down, in exchange for giving you the wrong blood. This is demons blood, but is it mine?" He was clearly having way too much fun with this. "It is mine... Rest assured I want Dick taken out, so while I might have agreed to what he offered, it doesn't mean I'm going to honor it... I'm a demon after all, we're shady little tikes."

He tossed the vile to Sam who scrambled to catch it before it could hit the floor.

"How do we know you're not lyin?" Dean asked. "That it's really your blood?"

"Don't trust me, please-" Crowley shrugged. "It's actually better that you don't, you'd be a bloody idiot if you did. But, I made this arrangement with you long before Dick tried to sweet talk me and ply me with liquor. Besides... I might be the King of Hell, and a demon with a knack for bending people over, but as far as I'm concerned, Dick Roman is a hell of a lot worse than I am. He wouldn't have honored his end of the bargain anymore than I would have. So, take it, make your weapon and go snuff out that bastard." He eyed Castiel for a moment. "If you lot survive perhaps I'll return and we can have a little chat, aye Cas?"

Cas only narrowed his eyes at him before Crowley vanished.

"Call me crazy but I have a really bad feeling about this." I said.

Sam eyed the vile of blood and nodded. "Yeah, well- I guess we don't have any other choice. For the moment we have to try to trust the guy."

Over the next few hours Sam and Dean readied our weapon, and as they combined all three of the bloods we had collected into a bowl, and then poured it over the bone- We all stared around the darkened cabin expecting some sort of thunder strike or sign of God. This was supposed to be a weapon that God himself had conjured up, after all he had it written down on that stupid tablet.

"Well-" Sam sighed. "That's not very reassuring."

"Ya think?" Dean said sarcastically. "Maybe Crowley really did give us the wrong blood."

"Or," I sighed. "Maybe this is just it? Ya know, when Lee preformed the spell that was supposed to slow down my _other _spell from dissolving, I expected something pretty big in the grand finale. Let's just say it wasn't impressive at all. According to Lee, god's not flashy."

But even if that was true, it still didn't erase the paranoia. Crowley seriously liked to screw people over and there was no reason to believe he wouldn't do that to us again.

Dean stared at the bloody bone for a moment before turning away from the table. "Ok, now we just need to figure out what the hell we're supposed to do now. Crowley said Dick knows we're comin, which means he's gonna be on the look out. So, who's for not tryin to sneak our way in and making an entrance instead?"

"Such as?" Sam snorted. "You mean, just... Walk right into the building without even hiding?"

"So to speak-" Dean shrugged. "Someone needs to get their attention, so that Cas and me can sneak in the back."

"Excuse me?" Cas said, finally giving us his attention.

"You heard me, man- We need you... It's time to take down the big boss, and I can't do it without you."

"But..." Cas slightly panicked. "You don't understand, Dean. I'll only fail again, I'll only cause more pain and destruction."

"Yeah well..." Dean sighed and threw on his jacket. "Broken or not, I'll take ya... We're kinda lacking in numbers right now. And, Lara's gonna be teamin up with Sam to find Kevin, so that leaves you."

I knew I could probably try to convince Cas on my own to help us out, but I wanted to see if he would make this choice on his own, which of course he did. Even though he clearly wasn't pleased with it. But, he wouldn't let his friends go off on their own, so fake crazy or not, his heart was still in the right place.

* * *

It was go time, and the drive to Chicago wasn't exactly what I expected. We separated, Sam and I took my car- Dean and Cas went in the impala. And we each arrived at different times as so ordered by our oldest brother. He figured it would be more inconspicuous that way I guess, but either way it didn't really matter- Since Dick knew we were coming. We made sure to grab different motel rooms on the completely opposite ends of town, communicated only by the motel phones just in case somehow our cells had been tapped into. Basically we were skulking about like hired hit men or spies, or whatever you wanted to call us.

When we started for Dicks office building we swapped vehicles, or _stole _more vehicles, and tried to think of a way of creating a diversion, which just so happened to be to blow something up. Sam wanted to build a bomb... I had a better idea.

My brothers and Cas had witnessed my burning fest with Hester, that they knew- But I had neglected to tell them of what else had been happening, which was seeing Cas without his vessel. It was occurring more frequently now, instead of a fraction of a second, it grew longer eventually becoming ten seconds, and once even an entire minute. Naturally, I kept it to myself, because we had enough to deal with right now and they didn't need to be freaking out about my spell dissolving, which is obviously what it was. I mean, what else would it have been?

Anyhow, since it was apparent I didn't have much choice and the spell was going to dissolve whether I liked it or not, why not take advantage of it? So, that's what I did. Before Sam could actually go into the process of making a bomb because we really didn't have that kind of time, I focused as well as I could on the front of the office building, hoping against hope that there wouldn't be any innocent bystanders around before a row of vehicles parked in the parking lot all exploded into fireballs simultaneously.

Sam and I observed from across the street where we were waiting in our stolen car, and once he noticed the balls of fire leaping high into the sky, along with thick clouds of black smoke- He looked at me with widened eyes.

"Lara?" He nudged me from the drivers seat. "Please, please tell me that wasn't you?"

"What?" I snickered. "Of course it wasn't me, what the hell, dude?"

Either I was getting better at lying or Sam was just too frazzled to notice. "You sure?"

"Uh, yeah- I think I would know if I managed to obliterate an entire row of friggin cars."

Honestly even I was questioning if I had done it. I felt nothing at all, and I definitely wasn't weakened this time around. Ok, something really fishy was going on and I had no idea of knowing what it was. But now wasn't the time to think about that, because while everyone was running around like chickens with their heads cut off in the parking lot- Sam and I darted across and through a set of trees to the back entrance of the building.

More then likely Dean and Cas were already inside, since Cas could easily zap them there- So Sam and I were on our own when it came to finding Kevin. And seeing is that this building was huge and he could be anywhere, yeah... Not exactly simple. Not to mention that the friggin building was crawling with leviathans. By the time we made it halfway down the hallway towards the emergency stairs we had whacked off five heads. It wasn't really easy to sneak through a place when every monster there knew our faces. In between ducking and hiding in cubicles as people ran past, we were opening doors and searching practically every square inch for our prophet.

We certainly didn't expect to run into the kid as he was fleeing down a hallway, but that's exactly what happened when he ran straight into Sam- And seeing is that's like running face first into a giant red wood, Kevin went falling to the floor.

"Kevin?" Sam said, helping him to his feet. "Are you ok?"

"Sam..." He looked at me. "Uh, sorry I kinda forgot your name."

I flinched but let it slide. "Whatever, are you ok? How did you get loose?"

"I picked the lock on the door... Sam, we gotta do something, they're gonna kill all the skinny people."

"What?" Sam tugged him out of site as we ducked into a supply closet. "What do you mean they're killing all the skinny people?"

"I-I dunno, some sort of additive they're putting in foods, it's in the lab. We have to blow up the lab, Sam."

Sam looked at me and I only shrugged.

"Ok, uh... I guess we'll head to the lab then."

Sam slowly creaked open the door and peaked into the hallway, for the moment the way was clear so we darted out and headed towards the lab which was in the basement. The descent down the stairs was surprisingly quiet, as well as the way we headed towards the lab. But that all changed when we heard voices coming from behind two swinging doors.

We burst in just in time to see Cas yanking Dicks head back and Dean jamming the bone into his neck. What followed suit was the normal thing, he was screaming and gurgling in pain, but that lasted only a few seconds before a strange vibration started shifting through the room. It took only a few seconds to notice that it was somehow coming from Dick. And then the strangest and yet most frightening thing happened. He started laughing.

The last I saw of Cas and Dean they were both taking steps back before he exploded into an disgusting splatter of black ooze. Sam covered both Kevin and I and tried to shield us, and once it was over and done with we looked back to see that they were gone... All of them. Cas and Dean they were just gone.

"Dean? Cas?" I called out, taking a few steps closer hoping maybe they had just been knocked back behind medical tables, they weren't there. "Oh my god... What happened to them? Sam?! Where are they?!"

He started across the room, seeming to do just what I had done, searching every nook and cranny for them to be hiding, but the damned room was empty.

"Sam, where did they go?!" I shrieked again.

"I don't know!" He started taking frantic circles.

When Crowley suddenly appeared in the room Sam grabbed me and yanked me closer.

"Crowley, what the hell? What happened?!" He asked.

Crowley only smirked as he took a few steps closer. "What can I say, those god weapons have a bit of a kick to them."

"Where's Dean and Cas?" I couldn't seem to control my pitch right about now.

"That... I can't answer. I suppose I should thank you though, you got the job done. Honestly I didn't think you could do it, but..." He held up his arms. "Guess I should learn by now to never underestimate the Winchesters. Well, since this is over I don't think you'll be needing your little prophet any longer." He then snapped his fingers and two more demons appeared before Kevin and grabbed his arms, with another snap they vanished with him. "Surprising enough, I actually feel sorry for you two girls. Now you're both really and truly on your own. You lost your boyfriend-" He pointed to Sam. "You lost yours." Now he pointed to me. "You two, are all each other's got now."

Just as always he smiled before disappearing and Sam and I were left to ourselves with no way of knowing what happened- Or where Dean and Castiel had vanished to.


	74. Chapter 74

**_Can't believe I have 200+ reviews that's so crazy. Thanks to everyone who reviews regularly you're awesome!_**

* * *

For the first few months after Dean and Cas vanished, I dug into every single occult book, mythological legend, even things that held absolutely no relevance to find them. I had no idea what happened after they killed Dick, how they had just completely disappeared with no trace left behind what so ever. Those months were completely agonizing, and it didn't help matters that I woke up one morning and found Sam had as well, left. I tried to chock it up to his own way of coping, but that mindset didn't last long when I realized that he wasn't so much trying to cope, but completely avoiding me. I would call him, he'd ignore it. I would text, same thing. Eventually out of the blue one day he sent me one text and one text only which said,

_I'm doing what I need to do in my life, Lara. Just leave me alone._

So, that's what I did. I left him alone. If he was going to be like that then screw him- I would find Dean and Cas on my own. Which, unfortunately proved to be impossible.

Another three months went by and I wasn't making any progress. I did jobs throughout the moments of being stuck in a dead end, a few vamp cases, vengeful spirits, etcetera... But when the sixth month flew by and still I hadn't any idea where my oldest brother and Cas had gone, I knew I needed help. I tried contacting Gabriel, thinking it was worth the risk of him fucking with me if he would just help- I got no response, I even went as far as dabbing a little in witchcraft, which proved to be just as fruitless. There was a spell that I had learned, one that would, no matter who or where this person might have been- Whether it be heaven, hell, on earth or simply being held somewhere that was pretty much a black hole, it could basically sniff out their soul. I used this spell, hoping to come across my brothers, because since Castiel was an angel- Naturally he wouldn't have a soul.

No response... According to what was burned onto the rough wood table face before me, my brother was no where in either of those locations. Still I was stuck.

Sam could pout and do whatever the hell he wanted later, the fact of the matter is is that I needed help, now. So, I tried to contact him again coming to find out that every single one of his phones had been disconnected. All of his alias' that he would use in the past wasn't being used this time, so I tried the last thing I would expect... His actual name. Come to find out, it wasn't that far fetched... I found him, and apparently he was living in Kermit Texas.

So I started driving and I didn't stop until I pulled to a stop in front of a nice little house. The impala wasn't in the drive, but another vehicle was.

"Oh no he didn't..." I said, cringing. "If he got rid of Deans baby..."

I pulled into the drive and cut the engine and didn't hesitate to fly up the front porch steps and ring the bell. I was tempted to just bust in on him and start kicking his ass, but it was Sam we're talking about- Going up against him would be like going up against a sky scraper. But I was definitely fuming and ready to lash out at him with words when the door opened.

For a moment I fumbled slightly, it wasn't Sammy that answered the door, but a woman. She was petite and decent looking, with dark curly hair and equally dark eyes.

"Can I help you?" She asked, giving a small smile.

"Uh..." I shook off the surprise. "I'm sorry to bother you, but- I'm actually looking for my brother and this was the address I found... His name is Sam?"

Her brows rose. "You're Lara?"

"Yeah, that's me. Is Sam here?"

"Sorry, no. He's working, but... Come on in, he's told me all about you." She smiled and opened the door for me.

Somehow I very much doubted that Sam had actually told her about me- At least the truth anyways.

"My name's Amelia." She said, motioning to the couch. "Can I get you something to drink? A beer maybe?"

"Sure, that'd be awesome thanks." I tried to force out a smile, but in reality I was ready to spit fire.

This is what Sam had been doing for the past six months? Yeah, sure I could understand him wanting a girlfriend and all, but comon! Seriously?! Completely ditching me and trying to find Dean to shack up with some chick?

She brought me my beer and sat it on the coffee table and my eyes went to a dog lying on the floor on a dog bed.

"Pretty dog." I stated.

"Oh, he's Sams." She smiled and I felt my face go flat.

"Sams?"

"Yeah, it's a long story. It's actually how we met... About five months ago this guy came running in holding a dog he'd accidentally hit... I was the vet that took care of him."

"And, staying true to fairy tale fashion your eyes met and you bonded over the dog, blah blah blah you fell in love and now here you are." I said, smiling and she chuckled.

"Well, it took a little longer than that I guess, but... Basically." She leaned forward in her chair. "So, Sam said that you live in Boston, I guess you managed to take a vacation finally. I've been trying to get Sam to ask you to come visit, but he's always said that you can't get away from work."

"Yeah..." I chugged a mouthful of beer. "Well, work can be hectic."

"Well being an ER nurse I would think so."

ER nurse huh? Well, despite never having gone to medical school sure why the hell not? I could set broken bones, stitch wounds and dig out bullets just as well as the rest of em.

"Do you know when Sam's gonna be back? It's been six months since I've seen him, kinda wanna kick his butt for not calling enough ya know?" Thankfully she took that as a joke when in reality I meant it. I was seriously going to kick his ass, giant tree man or not.

"Should be less than an hour, I could always call him if you want?" She said.

"Ooh, no. I want to surprise him. I love his face when he's surprised."

She nodded and awkwardly handled her own beer. "So... Sam told me about your oldest brother... Dean... That you'd lost him... I just wanted to say I'm sorry."

My smile quickly faded and I was certain a flash of anger must have sparked in my eyes.

"Thanks, it's been tough, but... Time is supposed to heal all, right?"

Ok this chick was nice and all but she seriously needed to not talk about Dean. She didn't know the first thing about what happened, and even more so did I want to kick Sams ass. Ok, so he just spouts that we "lost" Dean, that makes it sound so simple and somewhat innocent. Losing someone generally means that they were dead, maybe in a car crash, or whatever... But with us, "losing" someone, actually meant _losing_ them. Dean was lost in every sense of the word, and it pissed me off that Sam could just make believe that he was dead, and then move on like it was nothing.

We chit chatted for the next hour which was still awkward and finally I heard the rumble of the impalas engine pull into the drive.

"He's here." She grinned and jumped to her feet. "I'm sure he's going to be really happy to see you, Lara."

"Me too." I stood, smirking sarcastically and listened to his footsteps start up the porch.

When the door opened Amelia met him in the entrance way, she gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek and then said. "I have a surprise for you."

He rounded the archway and when he saw me standing there his feet skidded to a stop. His face went blank and eyes wide.

"Hey, bro!" I said sarcastically. "Long time no see!"

He swallowed once over before looking down at Amelia. "Hey, Lara. Yeah, long time no see."

"So, nice house, nice dog... Amelia's not that bad either." I smiled and Amelia only laughed.

He clenched his jaw. "Yeah, thanks... Uh, why don't we go outside and talk, huh?"

Amelia nodded. "I'll go get dinner ready, I asked Lara to stay, so... You guys go catch up."

She headed towards the kitchen and once she was clear Sam didn't hesitate to grab my wrist and drag me outside and past the porch.

"What the hell, Lara?" He snapped. "What are you doing here?"

"Wow, over reacting much?" I pulled my arm away. "I came here to see you, how was I supposed to know you were shacking up with a girl?"

"It's not shacking up." He let out a huff of air. "Ok, just... Get to why you came, huh?"

"Uh, isn't it obvious? It's been six fucking months, Sam. Still, no Dean, no Cas. What the hell are you doing? I need your help!"

"I can't help you-" He brushed his hair out of his face. "We made a deal, remember? If something goes wrong we're not supposed to look into it."

"Wow..." I crossed my arms over my chest. "I can't believe you. How selfish are you?! Screw the deal, dude- This is serious. Don't you think that if it was you in this situation that Dean would search his ass off trying to find you?!"

"I don't need a lecture, Lara." He crossed his arms. "This is my life now. I'm done. I'm out, I'm not a hunter anymore and Dean told me that if we were ever in a situation like this then to just walk away. It would be too dangerous to do anything else."

"Fuck you, Sam. Seriously. Fuck you." I started for my car. "So, tell Amelia sorry I couldn't stay for dinner, because if I did I would stab you in the throat!"

"Lara, wait." He chased after me and grabbed my hand. "I'm sorry, you just don't get it."

"No, actually I do. I do get it. You want a normal life, a normal girlfriend, a house, a dog a white picket fence. That's great, I'm glad you have that, Sammy- I really am-" I yet again pulled my hand away. "But, the thing about it is, is that you didn't just leave the life behind- You completely abandoned Dean, and me. So, there's a difference between leaving the life and being just plain selfish... Bye, Sam. Don't expect to hear from me again for a while."

I climbed in my car and took off, not looking back once.

* * *

Without Sam to help me the next six months weren't exactly pleasant. With no spell in creation that could help me track down my brother, and no other way of finding him- I didn't know what the hell to do. So I started hunting, hoping to come across a monster that might have some answers. Were Cas and Dean dead? Did they die when Dick had, or did something else happen? Were they somehow turned, or did they just vanish off the face of existence never to be seen again? But no one had any answers.

It was after I hacked the head off my latest vampire prisoner that suddenly it hit me... Dick, before being released into our world, had been in purgatory... And, when a monster dies... Where does its so called "soul" go? Purgatory.

My stomach fell to my feet at the thought of maybe, somehow, Dean and Cas were sent there with Dick when he died... So far it was the only thing that made sense, the only logical answer.

But I had no way of getting them out, if that was even it at all. I had no way of knowing. And if it were true, if that's where they were, they were stuck there... I had no one to help me.

I felt like I had been wandering and driving for the better part of an eternity with no real destination. I hadn't been on my own in what felt like forever, I had always been with my brothers and Cas. Now, no one. I had no one and it was enough to drive me crazy. It's funny, because I always actually considered myself to be somewhat of a loner, but I guess I couldn't say that anymore now could I?

It had been an entire year of them being gone- And normally someone might actually lay down and accept the fact that they were gone, but... Not me. I couldn't. It wasn't just my brother that was missing, but my angel too. This was killing me... Literally killing me.

So when my phone rang inexplicably one night I almost didn't answer it- Especially when I saw it was a number I didn't recognize, but I clicked accept anyhow and let out a quiet.

"Hello?"

And the voice on the other end almost made me pass out.

"Lara? Damn, it's good to hear your voice."

I sat up in bed, flinging the covers off of me. "Dean?!"

"Hey, kid... Where are you? We need to meet up." He said.

"Dean? Oh my god... I can't... When, did..."

"Yeah, I know- Crazy ain't it?" He chuckled. "Listen, can you meet me at Rufus' cabin?"

I was already up and stuffing my feet into my boots. "I'm leaving right now."

After stuffing all of my crap into the trunk of my car I hopped in the drivers seat.

"So..." Dean said. "How have you been?"

"I'm sure that can wait til we're actually face to face, can't it?"

"I guess, I just... Ya know, wanted to hear a friendly voice." I heard him sigh deeply. "Tell me what you've been up to."

My eyes were welled with tears to the point I could barely see to drive, but I left the motel anyhow.

"What I've been up to? I've been trying to find you, Dean. I've been taring up the friggin country just trying to figure out what the hell happened to you guys."

He chuckled. "Yeah, well- That mighta been a little hard there, cupcake. It was purgatory."

A tear ran down my cheek which I quickly brushed away. "I was afraid of that..." By now it was clear by my shaky voice that I was crying. "I'm sorry, Dean. I tried... I tried everything I could to get you outa there and bring you back- But I just couldn't find a way."

"I know, kid. It wasn't your fault." He went silent for a moment. "Ok, well... I'll meet you at the cabin, see you soon."

"Ok, be careful."

He actually chuckled. "Always am."

After we both hung up I floored it, and set in for the drive. It would take a good ten hours if I didn't stop only to fill up with gas, and I planned on going straight through.

* * *

When I pulled up in front of the cabin I could see a random car parked in the drive. I barely even put my damn car in park before I flew out and up to the door- It was locked, so I knocked practically fifty times in a row before it burst open.

Seeing Dean again after a year was overwhelming, and I tried to ignore just how blasted tired he seemed to be. He gave me a smile and let me in, but then stopped and held out two different plastic bottles.

"Just in case-" He said. "Douse yourself up, kid."

I didn't hesitate to pour the borax and holy water onto my arm, and then with a silver dagger cut a gash into my palm. Once I was through he did the same procedure, then tossed the crap aside. He pulled me into a hug so tight I was certain my ribs were cracking- But I didn't care, I squeezed him just as tightly.

When he pulled away my eyes scaled across the room, which he clearly noticed.

"Go ahead-" He said. "Ask."

"Where is he?"

He swallowed and pursed his lips, and truth be told I was already expecting the worst. Because when he called me, he never mentioned Cas- It didn't take a genius to realize that something obviously went wrong.

"He didn't make it, Lara... I'm sorry."

My eyes fell to the floor. "So... You saw it happen then?"

"I saw enough."

Any words that might have been said from me were stuck in my throat... How could Cas be gone? Really gone... As stupid as it might have been to admit, I was convinced that if he really was gone- Then I would have felt it. I didn't feel it, just as I didn't after he walked into that lake and vanished. Yes, there was an emptiness inside of me caused from his being gone, but... I could never really convince myself that he was dead. Just as it felt this time around. I couldn't feel he was really gone.

"You, uh... You ok?" Dean asked.

I nodded and pulled my eyes from the floor. "Yeah, I'm fine... Anyways." I turned and quickly gathered my bearings. "How did you get out?"

"A portal, I guess God never intended for humans to be stuck in that pit. I crawled my way out."

"A portal?" I sat on the edge of the couch. "How did you find it?"

Now his eyes fell to the floor and I could have sworn I saw a flash of shame or guilt spread across his face. "I had help."

"Help? From who?"

"A friend... I guess you could say he's a purgatory native."

"So, a monster?" I crossed my arms over my chest. "He was a monster?"

"A vamp to be more exact-" Dean went to the fridge and grabbed two beers. "And, I know what ya must be thinkin. How stupid and dangerous it was to trust a friggin vamp, but... You don't get the situation."

"No, I know-" I shook my head. "I can imagine what it must have been like there... I think I would have taken help from anyone if they were willing to give it... So," I paused and took a sip of the beer he handed me. "What happened to him?"

He avoided my gazes as he spat out the answer. "Brought him back with me... It was a spell that let me carry his soul out. Before I called you up, I found where he was planted and, well- Let's just say he's the best lookin walking dead guy I've seen in a while." He must have expected me to snap at him because he quickly defended himself. "He saved my ass in there I can't count how many times, kid- I owed him."

Honestly I could care less if it was a vampire or the frickin devil himself that helped Dean, I was just thankful he was back.

"So he took off then after you got back?"

His brows twitched slightly when I didn't immediately begin biting his head off. "Yeah, figured it'd be best to go our separate ways." I only nodded and he asked the question I was dreading. "Where's Sam? I tried calling all his numbers but they're disconnected... He's not..."

"No-" I quickly set that straight. "He's alive, and fine. Don't worry."

He nodded and let out a relieved sigh. "That's good, so... Where the hell is he? Why aren't you two together?"

And now, came the moment I was dreading the _most_, having to explain to Dean just what happened and why Sam and I weren't with each other.

"Uh, well..." I thought it over for a moment, and realized that there was no good way of phrasing it, no matter how I put it, it would sound just as bad. "He kind of... Took off."

"Took off? When?"

"A couple weeks after you guys disappeared. He's living in Kermit Texas now. He left Dean, really left. Meaning, he's not hunting anymore- He got a normal job, has a house... Everything." I left out the tidbit of him having a girlfriend and a dog.

He looked stunned, enough so that he actually set his beer aside. "Wait a second. Lemme see if I got this right. After Cas and me got shipped to purgatory, he took off and left you behind?"

"Pretty much."

"He ditched you? Really ditched you? He wasn't around to watch your back?" When I shook my head in answer he clenched his jaw. "So, I take it... He didn't give you a hand at all in finding me?"

"He mentioned what you had told him in the past. About if somethin like this ever happened then just keep goin, don't look back. Could be dangerous, blah blah."

"Yeah, ok- Well... Apparently you didn't listen to that." He was clearly pissed, hurt or... I didn't even want to know. "Ok, well. You got a way for me to call him? You got his new number?"

"I did, but- He might have changed it since then. I paid him a visit a few months back, didn't exactly end well." Still I handed him my phone. "Might be better to not call him with my phone, bud."

He nodded and punched the number into his own phone. I could hear it ring a good five times over before switching to voice mail.

"Sam, it's me. Take a second to have your freak out, then when you're done get your ass to Rufus' cabin. We'll be here." He then hung up and tossed me back my phone.

"So I guess we wait now." I sighed.

"Yeah..." He flopped down on the sofa and I moved to the armchair.

"Dean-" I muttered quietly. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

"About purgatory?" He snickered. "You wanna know what it was like?" I merely shrugged. "Imagine your worst nightmare, or the most dangerous situation you've been, then quadruple it. It was 24/7 running and fighting, every friggin monster you've ever heard of, and some you haven't, comin after you."

I shuddered after a chill shot through me. "I'm sorry... It sounds horrible."

"Yeah, it was, but... I dunno. Bein there for a while, it changes a person. Sounds crazy to say it, but you start to acquire a taste for combat." He chugged at his beer. "There, you didn't have to question anything- You knew what was what. Kinda hard not to, since you're constantly running, but yeah... It felt pure."

I nodded. "As opposed to reality, where you never know what the frick is gonna happen. Yeah, I get that I guess."

"Here ya never know what's gonna go down. Who'll be there for you, or be there to stab you in the back." He glanced at me, and I could tell he was itching to say something. "He, uh... Well he had snapped outa it by the time I found him. Cas... He helped get me to the portal, saved mine and Bennys ass over and over... Just so ya know."

My eyes couldn't rise from my lap. "That's good to know. At least he..."

I couldn't finish that sentence no matter how hard I tried. How could he be gone?

"Just in case he didn't make it-" He went on. "He wanted me to tell you..."

"No, Dean-" I shook my head. "I don't want to hear it right now, I can't... I'm sorry."

"Ok." He sat his empty beer bottle aside. "You look exhausted, cupcake- Why don't you get some sleep."

Easier said than done. Don't get me wrong, I was more than elated that my brother was back, and he was safe, but... I failed. I failed Dean, and I failed Cas. I should have tried harder to find them, to bring them back. I had a pretty good idea that they were in purgatory- There should have been something I could have done to get them out of there sooner. Maybe then this wouldn't have happened. Dean wouldn't have to live with the guilt, and maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't be feeling so completely dead inside right now.


	75. Chapter 75

Dwelling on the fact that Cas was gone wasn't helping any at all. I tried my best to push that as far back into my mind as I could muster. Instead, I focused on having my oldest brother back. For the most part he seemed normal, but I could tell after things died down and turned quiet- He was on edge. He wasn't sleeping much either, not really eating... Any little snap of twigs outside the cabin, strong gust of wind or random noise made him jump. He was ready to attack anything. In a way, I wondered if he might have been suffering from PTSD. It certainly would have made sense.

Overall he didn't want to talk about purgatory. He had given me the gist on the first night in the cabin, and it was enough for me.

It took two days for Sam to finally arrive, and once we both heard the rumble of the impalas engine- Dean cast me a look that said. "here goes nothin". In a way I felt guilty for having to tell Dean that Sam just up and ditched me, that he didn't help me try to find him- But... He deserved to hear the truth. Dean wasn't the type of dude that liked having anything sugarcoated. I could only imagine the aftermath Sam was going to feel now though.

He knocked on the cabin door and after a curt nod, Dean stomped over and yanked it open. Instead of the calm reaction I had gained when first showing up- He rather grabbed Sam and literally tossed him to the floor, immediately spraying him with borax and holy water.

"Whoa, hold it!" Sam sputtered. "I'm not a demon, or a leviathan!" Dean said nothing and instead grabbed Sams arm and cut a deep gash on the underside of his forearm. "Or a shifter, seriously!"

"Ok, good." Dean yanked him up to his feet.

"I don't know if I should hug you or punch you-" Sam chuckled, then his eyes fell over to me where I stood in the corner. His smile instantly faded. "Oh, hey Lara."

I said nothing and finally Dean did pull Sam into a hug.

"You look good, Sammy." Dean said, eying him up and down.

"I can't believe you're alive, Dean. Really, what the hell happened? Where did you go? It's been an entire year?"

"Short story- Ganking Dick earns you the honor of being shipped straight to purgatory." Dean started for the fridge, grabbing his third beer of the day. "That's where I've been."

"Purgatory?" Sams brows furrowed and he looked to me again. "Well... How did you get out?"

"I guess God didn't plan on humans being stuck in that place-" He answered, sitting at the table. "There was a portal, an escape hatch or whatever... That's how I got out." Sam didn't seem to know what to say. "So, really, Sam- I'm sure this year has been pure hell, huh?"

"Uh..." Sam fidgeted, yet again letting his eyes fall on me. "Well, yeah... I mean, after you were gone I wasn't sure what to do so I started driving, and I guess I... Kinda took a break from everything."

"After you looked for me, right?" Dean arched his brows. In a way I was thankful he wasn't flat out telling Sam that I had been the one to spill the beans. Sam however went stiff and his expression hardened. "Oh, so you _didn't _look for me?"

"I was only doin what you told me, man. You know the deal- If one of us disappears from something like that, then the other isn't supposed to dig into it."

"Yeah, I guess I did say that, right? That's good, yeah... Look out for yourself instead." Deans tone was calm, but I was waiting for the explosion. "Of course, we always said screw that friggin promise in the past and dug into anyways, right? Cause ya know, that's what family does for each other, or am I wrong?"

"Dean..."

"Never mind that you just took off in the middle of the night and left our little sister behind, nah... Whatever, that's cool. Then pretty much fell off the face of the earth and hid from her, when she was tryin to contact you. Yeah, I guess that's cool too. She's just a kid, it's not like she needs us to watch her back or nothin." He stood. "It's not like she's got this thing, ya know, the spell thing that's constantly givin her trouble- Gettin sick, going into frickin comas and zapping herself who knows where. Nah, that's cool, Sammy."

Sam sighed and looked to the floor. "I'm sorry, Dean. Really, I am... It's not like I planned to leave the life behind. It sorta just... Happened."

"Just sorta happened?" Deans brows arched. "Sure, I could see that happenin maybe after a couple years of me being gone, but not just a couple weeks."

"Look, after you disappeared I dunno... I guess I kinda snapped. I needed to get away, to drive somewhere, anywhere... Honestly I didn't really think of much else." He looked to me. "Including Lara- And I'm sorry for that, I really am."

No, no no- I wasn't done being pissed at him, so I refused to look at his puppy eyes.

"Listen can we just... Not talk about this and be glad that you're finally back?" Sam tugged off his jacket and slung it over the couch. "Tell me what happened? What happened to Cas, was he there too?"

Before turning around I noticed Dean harden his expression and shake his head no, and Sams shoulders slumped.

"He didn't make it?" He asked.

"No. And we're leavin it at that, got it?"

"Yeah-" I felt Sams eyes burning into the back of me as I pretended to rifle through the fridge. "I'm sorry, kiddo."

I slammed the door closed and turned to glare at him. "I'm fine. And, I really don't want to talk about it, so..."

"I get it-" Sam still walked over and grabbed me into a hug. I tried to resist it, tried to push away but was unable to and instead collapsed into his arms. He squeezed me just as tightly as Dean had, and if I wanted to stay pissed at Sam it certainly wouldn't happen now. "Just, ya know... I'm here if you ever wanna talk about it."

Damn you Sam, I thought... It wasn't fair that he could run off and live a happy life for an entire year and then come back and expect for me to just be sunshine and roses. I wanted to be mad at him, to hold a grudge like Dean always managed to do- But he made it too damned difficult.

When he finally put me back on my feet I forced back tears and went into making us all lunch. Dean didn't seem to be interested in the sandwiches I made- But after a good long minute of my glowering at him he finally scarfed down more than half. It was a start, I figured- At least he managed to choke down something. He couldn't live off of beer for the rest of his life.

The rest of the day was spent with Dean giving Sam the silent treatment, and I could tell by the look on his face he expected me to do the same. But, I dunno... Sammy just had a way about him, and even if he was basically screwing you over big time, he always managed to make you forget it by those stupid puppy eyes. One would have to gauge their _own_ eyes out just to avoid them.

When dinner time came around Sam offered to cook for all of us. I wasn't exactly hungry and neither was Dean, as he started fiddling around with Sams old phones that he had kept turned off for the last year. After a good ten minutes of listening through a set of headphones, Dean pursed his lips and shifted on the sofa to glare at Sam.

"What? What's wrong?" He asked.

Dean pulled the headphones out and clicked around then held it up on speaker.

"Hello, Sam Winchester? This is Kevin Tran-" The voice mail started. "I, uh... I didn't know who else to call. Crowley took me and kept me in a warehouse but I managed to escape. If you could give me call, please? I need help. And again, it's Kevin Tran."

Sams face fell flat as Dean clicked again and another voice mail started.

"Sam Winchester- It's Kevin again, it was a week that I called you last and I really need your help. I don't know where the hell I'm going or what to do. Crowley is after me. I was gonna try to call your sister, but uh... Well I couldn't remember her name. Call me back, please, thanks."

Sam pushed himself up from the table and walked into the room. "Ok, well- Do you wanna talk about this? Maybe figure out what's going on?"

Deans reply to that was yet again, turning on another voice mail.

"It's Kevin again. It's been three months since I've heard from you... And I-I... Dude, I'm so awesome right now, really. Ya know, you're a real asshole for ignoring me, but... Right no-now, I guess I don't care... Asshole."

"Uh, was he drunk?" I asked, scrunching my brows.

Dean flicked his eyes towards me for a second before turning on the final voice mail.

"Sam, it's been six months. I'm guessing you must be dead since you haven't contacted me. If you're not, don't bother trying to call me with this number- I won't be using it anymore."

Dean slammed the phone shut and stood. "That kid was our responsibility, Sam." He said. "And you were too damned busy to pick up the fuckin phone?"

He threw the phone at Sams chest hard enough that he actually winced.

"I'm sorry, Dean... How was I supposed to know?"

"You're sorry for an awful lot lately, man- Funny, I just don't buy it."

Dean flopped back down on the sofa and I stood awkwardly between them, unsure of what to say or do. Finally I ended up sitting down next to Dean as he glared at the tv screen that was playing some old black and white western. We all fell silent for the next hour as Sam clicked around on his laptop before finally clearing his throat.

"Check this out-" He said. "I cleaned up the audio file of Kevins last voice mail."

"So?" Dean retorted.

"So, I think I know where he was. At a bus station... Listen-" He played the file and I could hear faintly in the background a female voice over an intercom system stating the next stop would be Michigan.

"Michigan? Why would he be heading to Michigan?" Dean was now interested.

"Because, apparently- That's where his girlfriend is going to college."

"So does that mean we're heading to Michigan?" I asked.

Dean had already began packing his things so I suppose that was my answer.

Staying true to fashion I had to keep my car parked while I climbed in the back seat of the impala. Instantly I glanced to the spot beside me expecting Cas to be there just as always- But my stomach dropped when I remembered he wasn't coming back. One day, I told myself, one day I would be able to ask Dean what happened to him- How he died and what it was he wanted to tell me.

But I honestly didn't think I could do that now, not while the wound was still fresh.

The drive was long but somehow I enjoyed every second of it. Looking into the front seat and seeing my boys there was like a dream come true. Dean didn't hesitate to start blaring his music and poking fun at Sam. Sam of course sat in the passenger seat and ignored the jabs for the most part.

Dean was still pissed at him, it was obvious- But for the moment since we had a lead on Kevin he seemed to be setting that aside. Sam however only acted strange. Strange in a sense that you could read it all over his face that he had no desire in the world to be there with us. He'd rather be back with Amelia living his normal life.

Could I blame him? No of course not. Dean had always said that Sammy was different- That he always wanted a normal life. So while yeah, I did understand Sams motives for taking off and doing just that- I still couldn't get past the fact that he accomplished that by ditching me and Dean. Who knows, maybe there was more of a story to it- I don't know. But still, you don't run away from your family, you just don't do that.

When we arrived to Michigan and the town where Kevins girlfriend went to college, I followed my brothers through the crowded hallway of a dorm house until stopping at her door. We were back to our cheap suits and fake badges, and I actually couldn't help but chuckle over it.

Dean reached up and gave a firm knock and a good fifteen seconds later the door swung open.

Who I recognized to be Kevins girlfriend from the picture Sam showed peered up at us with an arched brow.

"Can I help you?" She asked.

Sam and Dean brought out their badges and started in with the spiel.

"I'm agent Thomson, these are my partners-" Dean said, motioning to Sam and I. "We're here to ask you some questions about Kevin Tran."

She didn't look very pleased about that.

"I haven't seen Kevin in over a year since he ran away and stole his Moms car-" She crossed her arm over her chest. "He went crazy or something. Did you know that before all of this he was getting into Princeton? He completely ruined his life, and I definitely wasn't going to stick around and let him drag me down with him."

Dean fumbled. "Uh, ok- Well we need to know if you've heard from him?"

"No, and he better not try to call me after this. I can't stand him."

I stuffed my hands in my ugly blue jacket pockets. What a bitch. If she only knew that her ex boyfriend was someone that pretty much could save the entire world, but of course we couldn't tell her that.

Dean and Sam both apparently had enough of talking to the girl and we left a short time later and made it to a restaurant on campus.

As Dean and I inhaled our burgers, or rather- Dean made out with his, seriously he was getting way too much joy out of eating that thing- Sam clicked around on his laptop until sitting back with a "huh".

"What?" Dean asked with his mouth full. "You got something?"

"Yeah... Think so."

He then went on to spout some drivel about tracking a certain I.P address, and a ton of other techy mumbo jumbo that Dean and I clearly didn't understand, and the entire time we sat there gaping at him with our mouths full. Once he was through, he acted as though he expected an applause for his efforts and Dean merely lied his burger down and said.

"Dude... I don't speak geek, say it in friggin english."

Sam rolled his eyes and turned the laptop to face us, showing us a surveillance shot, where Kevin clearly was pictured.

"I traced the i.p address back to a coffee shop, in Iowa. It's been used recently, which means... He's still there." He replied.

"Oh..." I nodded. "Well, good job then. So, Iowa is it?"

Dean nodded and carried his burger with him as we returned to the impala, jumped in and took off yet again.


	76. Chapter 76

_**I just wanted to make a note that the reasons why my chapters have been kinda short lately is because I'm trying to make what's supposed to be season 8 last as long as possible, because season 9 just started and since I have no idea what's going to happen- I don't wanna get caught up lol**_

* * *

Kevin was good at keeping his tracks hidden, to an extent anyhow. Once we came across the coffee shop that the owner mentioned he frequented almost daily, he pointed us in the right direction of where Kevin might be hiding out. Which just so happened to be an old abandoned church. Kind of fitting actually, I mean... He's being hunted by demons so naturally the first place he would turn to would be hallowed ground.

Just in case we spooked the kid Dean told me to go around to the back while he and Sam took the front. And after battling through waist length tall weeds and wild shrubbery I finally came to the back door which was bolted shut. It took a good minute of picking and prying to finally get the deadbolt off, and once I opened the door I carefully and quietly took a peak inside.

"Kevin?" I called out, I didn't want him to get the wrong idea and shoot me in the face or something. "It's Lara Winchester, Sam and Deans sister... Don't shoot me or anything- I'm comin in."

I heard no response and finally opened the door fully and stepped inside. As soon as the door was opened completely I was drenched from head to a toe from a rigged bucket of what I assumed was holy water- Which was positioned over the door frame. For a moment I stood there with my jaw clenched, sopping wet and huffing before moving into the room further and locking the door behind me. I made my way slowly through the hallway until hearing voices from the main room, seeing is that there wasn't any screaming I knew that Sam and Dean were ok. So I rushed through the hall and burst into a row of old pews, seeing them standing there wiping their faces with their coat sleeves.

Dean glanced up at me and snickered. "Lara, jeez, comon- We don't got time for you to go swimming, what the hell?"

"Shut up." I scowled and moved closer past Kevin who was standing in front of my brothers with a super soaker. "So, Kevin. Nice booby trap ya got back there."

"Yeah, sorry-" He said awkwardly. "Just, ya know- Can't take any chances when it comes to Crowley." He shook off the surprise of seeing us. "So what the hell happened to you guys?"

"Yeah that's a long story-" Dean sighed. "Let's just say that I spent my vacation in balmy purgatory, and Sam retired."

Kevin lowered his super soaker. "Really? Purgatory? How did that happen?"

"That's not important-" Dean shrugged. "So, why don't you tell us what you've been doin this whole year, huh? And why exactly did Crowley take you?" He smirked. "And, while you're at it, how you escaped."

Kevin finally tossed his holy water gun aside and started walking through the pews.

"He took me to read a tablet. Another word of god or whatever." He answered.

"Another word of god?" Sam snickered. "Just how many are gonna pop up?"

He ignored that question. "Anyways, it was a demon tablet. And before you ask me what all was written on it, I didn't get the chance to read it all. But-" He smiled. "What I did see I think is pretty important. One thing was closing the gates of hell... For good."

We all exchanged looks and Deans face was pretty much priceless. "Closing them? For good? Nah, we wouldn't wanna know anything about that. We like demons. Demons are our friends." He said sarcastically, then grabbed Kevin picked him up. "You're awesome, kid- Really."

Kevin chuckled and when Dean finally put him down he continued.

"Well it's a spell of some sort. I didn't get to see everything about it, I was kinda trying to figure out a way to escape- But, on the tablet too was instructions on how to open a devils gate. Crowley tracked one down in Wisconsin or something- But I lied to him, and told him I was gonna help him open it. And while he was gone-" He shrugged innocently. "I made a demon smiting bob, baked Crowleys men and took off."

"Gonna have to agree with Dean on this one-" I said with a smile. "You're pretty awesome."

"So, do you remember how to make these bombs?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, but it's not easy. Most of the ingredients aren't somethin you can pick up at the local grocery store. Crowleys men had to track them down for me."

"Well demon nuking bombs are great and all-" Dean said. "But I think I wanna focus on how to slam those gates closed. How bout you guys?"

"Hell yeah-" I answered. "Anything to be rid of Crowley and all his little bitches."

"Well that might be hard." Kevin sighed. "I sorta don't have the tablet with me. I hid it before I came here- Just to be safe."

"Ok, well where? You sure he won't be able to find it?" Dean asked.

"Oh yeah, don't worry. It's safe."

Dean nudged Sam and me before nodding to Kevin. "Well get packed up, kid. We're gonna help you out now. You don't gotta be alone in this anymore."

Kevin let out a relieved sigh and made his way for the back of the church. Once he was gone Dean motioned for Sam and I to follow and after we stepped outside on the cracked and decaying front steps- He actually let out a laugh.

"Man, to think that if this is legit- It can all be over finally. At least, the hunting demons and worrying about them friggin comin after us anyways."

Yeah there would still be other monsters out there to worry about, but I think we could all attest that demons were the most dangerous and pesky of all.

"So stupid question-" Dean shrugged. "But you two are in on this thing, right?"

I rolled my eyes, Dean didn't even have to ask that he should have known already. And after he noticed my sarcastic expression and knew my answer, he looked to Sam.

"Well, jolly green. What about you?"

Sam sighed and leaned against the railing. "Yeah, uh- How do we even know it'll work?"

"Word of god, bud," I replied. "Should be a pretty potent spell."

"But what if it's not? Or... What if Kevin is wrong, huh? I mean, we're gonna be taking a pretty big risk here."

"Huh-" Dean crossed his arms. "Call me crazy but I'm sensing that you don't wanna go through with this, Sammy. Ya know, why don't you level with me here, man. What is it you're so eager to get back to? What is it, a girl?"

Sams silence and clenched jaw obviously answered Deans questions. Which then of course caused Dean to glare at me as if he expected me to tell him what was goin on with our brother. But I didn't say anything. This wasn't my issue it was Sams, and honestly I just wanted all the bickering to stop.

"Just drop it, Dean-" Sam finally answered. "Yeah, ok. I'm in. I'll help with whatever this spell is."

"You sure?" Dean scowled. "Cause ya know, we wouldn't wanna put you out or nothin- It's not like we're tryin to save the planet."

"Dean..." Sam stood tall and towered over him. "I said I'm in, that's all that matters."

He turned and entered the church again and Dean let out a huff of air. "What's with him, kid? Seriously, is it a girl?"

"That's not for me to say, Dean." I replied.

But that was a pretty apparent answer all in itself which caused Dean to roll his eyes. "It was a year, Lara- A friggin year, not ten, not twenty- How could Sammy have gone civilian so damned quick?"

"I dunno-" I sat on the railing now and stared off at the trees in the distance. "It doesn't really make sense to me. He was always so gung ho about hunting, I mean- A person doesn't nominate themselves to be possessed by Lucifer and then jump in his cage if he wasn't committed to the cause."

"Yeah-" He finally allowed his hardened expression to fade. "So, how you holdin up, cupcake?"

"Me?" I snorted. "I'm fine, why?"

"Just checkin. Kinda my job ya know?"

Nodding, I couldn't help but smile. "Yeah, well- I'm fine. I got my big brother back right?"

"Don't get all mushy on me you freak."

"What? You don't want me to cry on your shoulder and then afterwards we'd braid each others hair and have a pillow fight?"

He narrowed his eyes at me. "Oh yeah, definitely missed your smart ass attitude over the last year." Now he smacked me with the back of his hand. "Let's get back inside, put a fire under Kevins ass. I wanna get outa here."

* * *

Castiel stared down at what was left of... Whatever monster this happened to be before another creature sank its claws into it. Whoever this man had been previously was currently replaced with fangs, gold eyes and reptile like skin. He had been completely gutted, his lower half severed as he tried his hardest to crawl across the ground towards Castiel, content even on the verge of death to at least chew him apart. For an instant Castiel actually took pity on the thing, whomever had left him such a shredded disaster didn't even have the decency to finish the job- And only left him to writhe on the ground in agony. He wasn't certain why he allowed the creature to gain so much ground on him, albeit slowly, he was accomplishing it. Perhaps it was the amazement that even when a monster was so close to death itself, it was still motivated by pure violence and blood lust. Just as the thing was practically a foot away he finally rose his hand and snuffed out what life it had left.

Once the job was done he turned and started down hill towards the clearing by he river, which was where he frequented.

He had lost count of the hours, days or even weeks it had been since Dean and Benny had escaped purgatory- He found it simpler to not think of them, or anyone. He was only glad that Dean had actually made it out. At least, he thought he had- There was still the uncertainty of what might have happened during the descent through the portal- For all he knew Dean very well might have been ripped to shreds. But he somehow doubted that was his friends outcome. If anyone was going to make it out of purgatory unscathed then it would definitely be Dean Winchester. He had learned ages ago to never underestimate a Winchester. Each of them had the uncanny knack of accomplishing anything they set their minds to.

Castiel half way had the urge to curse himself for actually allowing himself to think of them. He had vowed the moment he arrived in purgatory that he wouldn't- Even more so after Dean had left. The only thing he could do now was sit and wait... Wait for death, wait for nothing... He didn't know anymore. The guilt was pressing down on him more than anything else- The guilt he felt for lying to Dean, for making him believe that he had every intention of leaving this place with him when in reality that wasn't the case. But that was outweighed by the thought of...

He quickly shook that thought away- Refusing for even a moment to think of the one thing in the world that confused him more than words could describe. He hated to believe that Rachel had been right so long ago, that he'd been foolish for ever allowing himself to become attached to something that could die in decades, or... Rather, instead of having to stand back and watch _that_ happen, being separated due to circumstances beyond either of their control.

But he was convinced this was his punishment, the penance god expected out of him. He could tolerate the constant running in purgatory, the dodging death, the smiting all hours of the day. That wasn't the torture, the torture was the aching loneliness.

He was an angel of the lord, things like that shouldn't have made him bat an eye. Emotions were supposed to be forbidden, allowing yourself to feel anything only led to moments like these. But, thinking back on the times in the past he knew that he wouldn't have traveled down any other road. He would take the aching loneliness, the guilt and sadness- As long as he could retain the few fleeting memories of the moments he was convinced he actually felt happiness. Those thoughts were the only thing that had kept him going in this place, instead of allowing himself to be ripped apart by leviathan, or any other creature roaming through the forests.

His eyes trailed off in the distance, and at the sunrise slowly trying its best to peak over the treeline. With a sigh he crouched down at the water and readied himself for yet another grueling and lonely day.


	77. Chapter 77

"Answer the question-" The FBI agent in front of me barked. "You were there, witnesses saw you fleeing the scene of where the body was found. They described a young woman, early twenties, around 5'5 or 5'6, long brown hair and combat boots." She eyed me up and down. "Sounds a lot like you, doesn't it?"

I shrugged, and sat back wanting to cross my arms but with my wrists being cuffed to the friggin table I couldn't.

"I'm not the only chick in the world that fits that description." I replied.

She scowled at me bitterly. "Really? Ok, then how do you explain you were seen crouched down near the body, and you were picked up three blocks away?"

"Just who the frack is your witness anyways?" I arched a brow. "Lemme guess. English guy in a dark suit, good looking if you go for that evil devilish sort of thing?"

She ignored that question. "The church was covered on the inside with what looked like satanic symbols, the girl, Channing Ngo- Went missing three days ago, and- Guess what we found in her dorm room? What looked like a ritualistic killing. Her roommates throat had been slashed, her blood was collected in an chalice covered in skull carvings. How do you explain that?"

Ugh, all I could say right now is that Sam and Dean better be friggin grateful for what I was doing and they better get me the hell outa this place asap before I got the death penalty.

"Look, I'll tell you what I told your cop buddies-" I said, leaning forward. "I was taking a walk, happened to hear screaming coming from the old church and ran to investigate. That's when I saw the body lying on the steps."

"Why were you in the neighborhood at all? You said yourself that you don't live in this town?"

"What, a girl can't take a vacation? Jeez."

"By yourself?"

"Yes, by myself. I needed a break from everything and decided to go on a little _by myself _road trip. Really, it was just a coincidence that I was on that street when the girl was killed."

She tapped her pen against the table, not believing anything I was saying. "How do you explain the duffel bag inside the church? Gotta say, you've got quite a collection of identifications and phony FBI badges."

"I like to role play on the weekends. It's fun, you should try it." I smiled.

She slammed her palm down on the table now. "You were in the church, you were near the body, you were seen fleeing the scene, now tell me the truth- What happened?"

I shook my head and glanced up to the camera in the corner. "I'd like my one phone call now, please."

The door creaked open and another officer peaked his head inside. "Her attorney's here."

A smirk tried its best to form on my lips but I forced it away.

"Attorney? Who was the moron that..." The woman stopped her sentence short, then stood. "Fine, send him in."

So, obviously something had gone wrong, huh? Well, yeah but that's not exactly uncommon with us, so big surprise right? We had ended up sticking around at the church until after nightfall, and as we were getting ready to leave, low and behold who decides to show up and say howdy? Crowley, and he wasn't alone. Tagging along behind him was Kevins girlfriend, Channing. Only, it wasn't Channing, she was clearly being possessed by a demon. Along with her was two more demons that charged at all of us like friggin linebackers. Long story short, we ganked those a-holes, Kevin doused Crowley and Channing in holy water and as we were trying to make our escape, I in a typical stupid girl fashion, tripped and got separated from the boys. Channing got her neck snapped, and apparently someone near by heard the screaming and called the cops.

I didn't get the chance to catch up with the boys as they jumped in the impala, since Dean was a genius and parked a good block away. I shouted for them to go on without me because if they stalled around for me to get my lazy ass up off the ground then we'd all get taken in. So, I was the scapegoat, which was ok with me as long as it meant they got away. Within thirty seconds the church was surrounded by police vehicles, Crowley vanished, and I was taken in for killing Channing.

That had been twenty four hours ago.

Crowley was throwing a bitch fit since Kevin didn't cooperate, and I knew he was this so called "witness" that was trying to pin it all on me. Anything to give us a hard time, he would do it.

The door opened and I tried not to show the relief in my face as my so called "Attorney" walked in the room. It was Sam of course, dressed in his cheap suit with his hair combed back and carrying the stereotypical briefcase.

He approached the table and gave a slight smile. "I'm Henry Kissinger, I've been assigned to your case."

"Oh, great. I'm saved." I replied sarcastically, watching the FBI agent leave the room for me to talk to my "lawyer" in privacy.

Sam waited until the door was closed before he walked across the room and pulled the plug on the security camera.

"So... What happened?" I asked.

He sat down and shook his head, making a motion with his eyes towards the two way mirror behind him. Instead of speaking he clicked open his briefcase and grabbed a piece of paper.

"After hearing about what happened-" He said as he wrote. "I don't think that they'll be able to hold you for more than forty eight hours. All evidence is circumstantial."

"Goodie."

"Doesn't mean you're off the hook though-" He went on. "After all, you were the only person at the scene."

"What about the English guy I told the cops about?"

He cocked an eyebrow. "There wasn't an English guy at the scene, Lara. And if there was... There isn't a trace of him now."

I nodded. That was code for saying that Crowley was gone and hadn't turned back up, thankfully. Which meant that Kevin was still safe, and so was Dean.

"I'm taking down some personal information." Sam slid the paper towards me. "Is there anything that I neglected to document?"

I grabbed the paper and scaled over it, trying not to snort and what it said, which was.

_Don't freak out, we're gonna get you out of this. Dean's got a plan, just sit tight. You'll be out before you know it. Here's what you're going to do. Tell them the truth. Everything, demons, angels, purgatory, heaven, hell... Everything. Trust me, you'll get it later. Remember crazy works.  
_

"Looks about right to me-" I answered, pushing the paper back to him. "So, forty eight hours, huh? What do I do in the mean time, just sit in here?"

Sam nodded. "For as long as it takes for me to get these charges dismissed." He then stood and said sarcastically. "Have a nice day."

That forced me to scowl at him as he held back a snicker and left the room. Little smart ass just adding salt to the wound. It wasn't five minutes after Sam left did the woman come back inside and sit down in front of me.

"We can keep doing this, Lara-" She said, sighing. "Going back and forth, you denying knowing anything, making sarcastic comments- But the fact of the matter is, is that a young girl is dead and you know what happened. So, are you going to tell me the truth now?"

I faked sadness, allowing my eyes to fall to the table top. "If I tell you the truth, what happens to me?"

"That all depends on what you tell us, and if it really _is _the truth."

Nodding, I chewed my lower lip. "Ok, I'll tell you. But you won't believe me."

She seemed pleased and within seconds the room was filled with more officers and a video camera was being set up in front of me for my so called confession.

"First of all I'm going to say that I really didn't kill that girl, but I know what did... It was a demon-" Naturally everyone in the room went blank faced. "You see, I'm a hunter, which means I hunt monsters, and sometimes demons get in the way of that. Which is what happened this time. His name is Crowley, he's the King of Hell and he's a real asshole. Anyways, things have been pretty crazy lately, ya know because my Brother was in purgatory for a year after killing a leviathan, and my other brother hit a dog... I've been trying to cope with all of this on my own, and when my brother came back from purgatory, I expected Castiel to be with him..."

"Excuse me?" The woman leaned forward, her cheeks were aflame with anger. "What are you talking about? Is this a joke?"

"No, it's not a joke- Castiel is an angel, he's actually supposed to be my guardian because I'm the last seraphim and apparently all the archangels really didn't like me and wanted to kill me. I marked him with a brand that told all other angels that he's my guardian, which means he pretty much belongs to me. But, he's gone now... When my brother came through the portal in purgatory Cas wasn't with him, but he did carry a vampires soul in his arm and put it back in his skeleton. So he's alive again."

"Lara... This is serious, you need to tell us what happened to the girl." I could tell she was trying not to scream at me.

"I did tell you. Crowley broke her neck because we took Kevin, he's a prophet of the lord, and he's the only one that can read the demon tablet. We wouldn't let Crowley take Kevin so he got pissed and killed Channing after the demon that was possessing her smoked out. Demons look like black smoke if they're not wearing a meat suit." I looked from each person and smiled. "So can I leave now? Because I really need to help find the demon tablet. Kevin is going to translate it so we can shut the gates of hell for good. It locks every single demon roaming on earth back in hell which means they won't be able to come back up here and kill anyone else."

One of the male officers in the corner snorted out a laugh. "Someone needs to get her a straight jacket."

"Well I've actually already been in a psychiatric hospital. I lost my memory after my dormant powers started showing, the spell is dissolving that's keeping me from hulking into a seraphim. Castiel rescued me from that place, but it was crawling with demons, I got stabbed with a piece of broken glass but he healed me. He was an angel, which means he can heal people."

"Ok, I've heard enough." The woman stood and flicked off the camera. "I don't know what game you think you're playing..."

"Trust me, it's not a game. And if you know what's good for you, you'll salt around all the windows and doors to keep the demons out- And you can't trust any other angels either, because they're all dicks with wings."

If there weren't so many people in the room I have a feeling she would have pounded my face in. But, she didn't, and as soon as the so called confession began, it was over and everyone left the room and I was alone.

That actually felt good, I thought. Finally spitting everything out. Yeah, of course they thought I was friggin nut case, but still... It was nice being able to say out loud what it was I actually did with my life. It would be the only time I could say it to anyone- And, I was pretty certain that I freaked these people out, which was a bonus. It's what they get for arresting me in the first place.

After a few more hours, I was starting to wonder if these people remembered I was still cuffed to this table, but when the door finally opened and the woman returned she didn't look at all happy.

"Well, good news for you I suppose. Your Doctor is here."

"My Doctor?" My brows scrunched.

She stepped aside and who walked in next made my jaw drop.

"Lee?" I wanted to stand but couldn't. "What the hell, dude? I thought you were dead?!"

He gave an eye roll and looked to the officer. "I'm sorry, she's under the delusion that I'm some creature called a Seraphim. It was as I discussed with you earlier, she often has trouble telling the difference from reality and the complete nightmare going on in her mind. You understand, of course?"

She nodded slightly. "You've got your work cut out for you, Doc."

"Yes, well- Had she not escaped from the hospital and abandoned her medication schedule I'm almost positive that she would be improving." He moved closer to the table and stared down at me, giving a wink. "Well, Melinda, are you ready to return to the hospital? Your friends miss you."

I blinked a few times over. This was Deans plan? Make me out to be an escaped mental patient? Well, I certainly accomplished convincing the cops in this joint that was the case after talking about demons, angels and purgatory.

"We can't release her..."

"Yes, you can-" Lee glared at her. "I've brought the proper forms, and since I'm the only person she'll talk to calmly without trying to stab them in their eye sockets, I was nominated to come and retrieve her. Besides, had you examined those papers thoroughly you would see that she is serving her previous sentence in the hospital." I couldn't see his face but I knew he was staring her in the eye. "So, you're going to let me take her, aren't you?"

She blinked a few times over, and it was obvious Lee had done some kind of mind control on her. I wasn't even aware he had that ability.

"Y-Yes-" She stuttered. "You can take her."

"Thank you-" He motioned towards me. "Now if you would be so kind as to remove her cuffs, I'll take her and be on my way."

She fumbled forwards and uncuffed my wrists and I finally stood. My legs were so stiff I let out a slight groan.

"Follow me, dear." Lee said, and grabbed hold of my arm, leading me from the room and through the police station.

Once we were outside I yanked my arm free. "Seriously, what the hell, dude? I thought you were dead?"

He started down the stairs and I quickly followed. "Yes, well- Thanks so much for the vote of confidence."

"How'd you get out of that building?"

"That's a long story I suppose. But, to make it short so you can understand. After I gave you that little something it pretty much made the sigils in the building unable to contain me."

We walked down the sidewalk and dodged pedestrians, I struggled to keep up with his long strides before we stopped on a street corner.

"What exactly did you give me anyways? For your information some pretty crazy shit happened after that. I deep fried an angel extra crispy, could see Cas' true form, and then blew the crap out of a row of cars."

He snickered. "Been busy have you?"

"What did you do to me?!" I shrieked, causing a few people on the corner to glance at me awkwardly.

"Let's just say that I..." He paused and his smirk faded. "God gave me an order, and you always obey, no matter what the sacrifice."

"That doesn't answer my question."

He looked down at me. "Lara, I gave you a gift, let's just keep it at that."

"No way-" I jerked him by the arm. "Tell me what you did."

"Fine-" He turned to face me. "Before you have a conniption, I'll say that your spell hasn't dissolved. But what I gave you was what I like to consider is a reservoir, of my own abilities. I gave you what essentially, made me seraphim."

I took a step back. "You did what?"

"Calm down, it's not as bad as you think. Besides, you need them more than I do."

"But... I don't get it, why would I need them?"

"For the future, and whatever might become of it. But just because I gave them to you, it doesn't mean you can use them whenever you fancy it. As I said, it's a reservoir- Which means it fills to an extent and can only be used in times of complete distress. And sometimes not even then."

Fumbling, I turned and noticed an empty bench and quickly sat down. "How could you do something like that? I don't want my own fucking abilities much less yours!"

"God ordered it done."

"Great... God, yeah- Ok, and where is God, huh? I think I'd like to have a little chat with him. It's so awesome how he decides something like that, what am I anyways? A game piece?"

"So to speak-" He sat down beside me. "You never know what will happen in the future."

"This is bullshit... How the hell am I supposed to use whatever you gave me anyways, huh?"

He shrugged. "You claimed you've used them already. I didn't just give you my powers, Lara- But along with it the knowledge in how to control them. I couldn't very well sit back and watch you nuke the entire planet, now could I?"

"This isn't fair... I don't want them, take them back."

His laugh practically echoed down the street. "I can't take them back you twat. They're yours now which leaves me pretty much powerless. Oh, I still have my wings, and there's a few little tricks still within my capabilities, but... I couldn't take them back from you even if I tried."

I crossed my arms over my chest. "What's gonna happen in the future that's so bad that I would actually need your crap too?"

"Naturally I can't tell you that."

"Oh, naturally-" My eyes rolled. "Ok, so. Whatever, I don't wanna think about that anymore, I've got enough to deal with right now. So, why did you come in and get me and what's with the crazy spiel I played?"

"Well Dean figured it would be best if we made your release believable, which explains the forged documents Sam printed up that stated you were an escaped mental patient."

"But you just used your mind mojo on that chick so was it really needed?"

"Yes, because once you're gone if there wasn't an explanation then naturally your face would be plastered all over the news, you can't be a wanted criminal you know?"

"Where are my brothers anyways?"

He kept his attention focused on the people walking the street. "They're coming to pick you up, don't worry you won't have to deal with me for much longer."

Good. He was proving more and more that we couldn't be friends. I had looked past his cocky attitude and mean comments towards my brothers- But him actually doing... Whatever he did, no, no way. He turned me into an even bigger freak than I already was. How exactly was this fair? Especially since he went through the trouble of going to God in the first place to try and stop my spell from dissolving- How could he then in turn, tell Lee to just give me all of his powers? What the hell kinda sense did that make?

"How exactly did my brothers find you anyways?" I asked, sighing. "Or did you find them?"

"Sam prayed to me, a little surprising actually, I certainly wasn't expecting that. He told me the situation at hand- How you lot were currently in the process of trying to close the gates of hell, that you were taken in by the authorities- I figured it wouldn't harm any if I stepped in and gave a little assistance."

"So you're still able to hear prayers, huh?"

He nodded. "I suppose you could consider me an empty vessel, all of the working parts on the outside, but on the inside completely hollowed out. I'm basically useless when it comes to combat now, which explains why I haven't been around. But this incident didn't require fighting, so I was capable."

"I'd trade places with you if I could."

I could feel his eyes burning onto me. "I heard about Castiel. Can't say that I'm surprised, as I always stated he was a weak example of a guardian."

"Shut up-" I jumped to my feet. "Just shut up about him. You have no right to even speak his name!"

"Did Dean tell you how he perished?" He ignored my snapping at him and gave a crooked smile.

"N-no. I didn't want to know."

"Interesting. Perhaps you should ask him of that."

"Why?" My fist clenched and I was certain if he said one more thing about Cas I would pop him in the nose. "That's not something that I really want to hear."

He popped the collar of his overcoat and cocked his head slightly when the impalas engine could be heard growing nearer.

"Maybe because... Castiel isn't dead?" He said, which made my fist unclench. "He's still alive, and still in purgatory."

A loud ringing filled my ears now and every ounce of blood drained from my face.

"How do you know that?" I asked weakly.

"A suspicion. Ask Dean, maybe he'll confirm it- Maybe he won't. But, still- Even if I might be mistaken I think it would still be best if you heard what happened. At least you would have some closure, correct?"

My expression was horrid I was certain, and when the impala pulled to a stop beside the curb I simply climbed in and slammed the door, not even bothering to say good bye or thank you. Lee only smirked at me still sitting on the bench as we pulled away.


	78. Chapter 78

Don't get angry at Dean, I told myself over and over again. If Cas was still alive I was certain that he would have told me. Lee must have been wrong, or maybe he was just an asshole and wanted me to get my hopes up- I didn't know. But, I told myself so many times that Dean didn't lie to me, he wouldn't do that.

We drove to the next town over before stopping to grab a bite to eat. Kevin was still with us of course, and had been unusually silent for the last few hours. And as Dean gobbled up his burger and pie, Sam his salad, and I stared at my plate with no appetite what so ever, finally he spoke.

"I wanna go to Michigan and see if my Mom's ok."

Dean stopped chewing long enough to gape at him. "Uh, what?"

"You heard me, I wanna go to Michigan. I haven't seen my Mom in over a year, she's gotta be freaked."

"Sorry, kid- We can't do that. It's too dangerous." Dean stuffed another huge bite in his mouth.

Kevin sat up straight. "Hey, I just watched the King of hell snap my girlfriends neck! I'm not gonna sit back and do nothing when my Mom could be in danger. So either you take me to see her, or I won't tell you where I hid the tablet."

I barely paid attention to the conversation, my mind was spinning. Not only did I have to think about maybe Cas still being alive and stuck in purgatory, but I had to deal with what Lee had given me. He called it a gift, ha- More like a friggin curse. I certainly didn't want it, and what the hell was I supposed to do with it? By the way he described it, the powers were there only _sometimes_, and even if they were I couldn't use them whenever the hell I wanted. So really, what was the point?

"Ok, fine-" Dean said, interrupting my thoughts. "If that's what it's gotta be, let's hit the road."

Since I didn't eat my own burger Dean boxed it up for himself and we returned to the car.

So of course I didn't tell my brother what Lee had given me- It would only bring about more issues right now. It was bad enough that Dean had to worry about my spell dissolving but then I could smack him in the face with this? Not-uh, I wasn't gonna do that. He just busted out of purgatory, and still hadn't recovered from the year spent there. He didn't need this on his shoulders too. And Sammy? Well, Sam hadn't been the same since he showed up at Rufus' cabin. Yeah he was there physically, but mentally he was far far away.

Overall the drive to Michigan was fast, and when we pulled into the neighborhood where Kevins house happened to be, Dean parked across the street.

"Yeah, that's what I figured-" He said, staring through binoculars. "Check out the mail man, and Mr. Enthusiastic gardener."

Kevin grabbed the binocs from him and looked as well. "What about em? I know them?"

"Not anymore you don't." Sam said. "Mail man has rounded the cul-de-sac three times, and pretty sure the gardener has drowned those hydrangeas."

I watched a small river of water rush down the sidewalk and stairs as the mail man didn't seem to be paying any attention to the letters he stuffed in the mailbox.

"Demons then." I said, then sat up straight. "Wait a sec. Kevin, is that your Mom in the window?"

He shifted in his seat to the point he looked around me. "Yeah, that's her... Thank god... She's ok."

Sam and Dean exchanged a silent look, one that I tried my best to read.

"We can't leave, Dean-" Sam said. "We can't just drive off and leave his Mom in there surrounded by demons."

I guess I was somewhat surprised that came out of Sams mouth. For the time he'd been back with Dean and I his mind wasn't exactly in full throttle.

"Yeah, I get it." Dean climbed out of the car. "Let's make it quick."

We sneaked through a neighbors yard to get to Kevins, and while Kevin came with me, Sam and Dean went the opposite direction to take care of the demon mailman and gardener. I was instructed to protect our prophet, which was a little difficult. The kid was about to fidget out of his pants.

We skulked behind a set of preened bushes and waited for the sign the way was clear. Which just so happened to be demons shrieking. After Dean appeared from behind a fence, I grabbed Kevin by the shirt and tugged him with me.

"It taken care of?" I asked.

"The ones outside, yeah. No tellin if they're are any inside." Dean waved for us to follow.

We met Sam at the front of the house and started up the front porch steps. Dean waited a good five seconds before ringing the doorbell and tugging me out of view. Kevin was the only one to stand at the door as it finally creaked open and we heard a very surprised. "Kevin! Oh my god!"

The kid didn't get the chance to respond before Sam and Dean jumped out and flung holy water in the womans face. She fumbled and sputtered but didn't sizzle so Kevin finally grabbed her and gave her a hug.

"Wait a sec-" Sam said. "Do you smell that?"

Oh yeah I smelled that. Sulfur ran rampant in this house, so we immediately pushed past the happy reunion and started searching rooms.

Sam and I entered the kitchen area just as a middle aged woman started smoking out.

Afterwards I stood partly in confusion and partly in sheer amazement when Sam started uttering the exorcism prayer backwards so fast it practically made my head spin. The results were just as surprising as the demon was forced back into its meat suit and Sam promptly stabbed it in the gut.

Once it was dead, Dean and I stood there with our heads cocked to the side and said in unison. "Well that's new."

Sam only arched his brows before we returned to the living room where Kevin and his Mother waited.

The next half hour was spent with trying to explain to the poor woman just what happened to her now dead friend, and why it was Kevin had been missing for an entire year. Her reaction wasn't what I figured it to be. Instead of freaking out, as normal people usually tended to do, she merely looked to her son with a crooked smile and said,

"Prophet of the lord, huh? Well I'm not surprised- You were always special. No, a genius. Why do you think you were in advanced placement?"

"Uhh," Kevin chuckled. "That kinda doesn't have anything to do with it, Mom. I guess I was just chosen, ya know... By god?"

Still somehow she was convinced his intellect had something to do with it all.

After everything was explained, we came to find out that Mrs Tran was insisting on coming with us no matter how much we tried to tell her how stupid that was. Afterwards Dean decided to make one last sweep around the house.

I followed because I needed to settle this business with Cas once and for all. I needed to know if Lee was lying to me.

When we hit the kitchen I grabbed him by the sleeve.

"Dean, I need to talk to you about something and please keep in mind that I deserve the truth?"

He was already confused but shrugged none the less. "Ok, shoot. What's up?"

"What happened in purgatory? What happened to Cas?"

His face fell flat but it didn't matter- I could see the guilt and pain in his eyes no matter how hard he tried to mask it.

"Don't ya think that might be a conversation to have later, cupcake?" He replied.

I shook my head. "No. I need to know. Just... Tell me... Did you see him die with your own two eyes?"

He shifted on his feet uncomfortably. "No. But what I saw was enough."

"That doesn't tell me anything, Dean- I need to know what happened. The exact details."

"Ok." He leaned against the counter. "We made it to the portal, it was up on a steep cliff side. Had to climb it and once we almost made it we got jumped by three leviathans." He tried to shirk it off. "We took em out, but I dunno- Maybe Cas was weak or tired, I have no idea- But we started up the hill again and I made it first, managed to get both feet in the portal. By that time, he uh... Well he was struggling and couldn't make it up himself. So, I grabbed his hand and tried to yank him up."

I studied everything about his facial features and judging by the creases around his eyes and the frown he carried I could tell he wasn't lying so far.

"And?" I prodded.

"And... He just let go. He couldn't hold on and me bein in the portal musta done something... It sucked me out before I could get him. Last I saw of him..." He trailed off and by now my insides felt like a twisted mess. "He was falling back down the cliff."

I was certain by now I was as white as a ghost. "You didn't see him die? He's still alive?"

"I dunno, kid-" He sighed. "He didn't look good, he was weak and well... Purgatory changed him. Hell it could change anyone. He just let go."

By now I was pacing frantically.

"So Lee wasn't bullshitting me?" I punched the counter next to me. "Cas is still alive and still stuck there... God dammit..."

Dean narrowed his eyes. "Lee?"

"Yeah. He told me that Cas was still alive but I thought he was just being an asshole. When you said he didn't make it I thought that meant he was gone, Dean!"

"For all I knew he was. You didn't see him in there, Lara- He gave up right at the friggin finish line. I couldn't get him out- I didn't know what to think after that."

"I know. I'm not pissed at you. You wouldn't have left him there to die." I pushed the hair from my face. "We have to do something. We have to get him out of there."

He shook his head. "You can't, kid. I'm sorry. There ain't no way of going about that without opening some kind of door- Which would let all the nasty loose again."

Yeah well he might have thought so but I sure as hell wasn't going to sit back and do nothing while Cas was stuck there. I was going to get him out, no matter what the cost.

* * *

We had taken Kevin and his Mom to get tatted up with anti possession symbols, and afterwards found a motel to rest so we could head out to get the tablet the next day. It was a long drive and everyone was irritable- Some more so than others, and after an hour of fidgeting anxiously I offered to go and grab some food.

I made sure to do it while both my brothers were indisposed. Dean was locked in the bathroom and Sam was glued to his laptop.

Dean was gonna be pissed I took his car but he could bite me for all I cared. I had a job to do.

After driving a few blocks from the motel I pulled the car over and cut the engine.

"Ok, so here goes nothin," I said to myself. "Lee, I know you can hear me and since you can I'm begging you- Please, please get your ass here as quickly as possible. I need to talk to you." I glanced around the car seeing nothing. "Oh, right... I don't know if since you lost most of your mojo if you need exact coordinates but..."

"You're yammering is grating on my nerves." He suddenly said from beside me. "So get to it. What do you want?"

I didn't even wait to allow the surprise to fade before blurting it out.

"I need you to find a way to get me into purgatory."

The silence after that was deafening as he stared at me with no emotion or expression what so ever. Just as I was about to slap him out of it he let out a deep breath.

"Purgatory? Oh, well why didn't you just say so? Of course I could get you into bloody purgatory, that's simple!"

I frowned at his sarcasm. "I'm serious. I need a way in and you're going to help me because if you don't, I'll find my own way and that would be a hell of a lot worse in the end."

He started shifting in his seat to the point I knew he was going to blow at any second.

"You're trying to kill me aren't you? Is this some sort of revenge for my being absent or maybe not stepping in on certain occasions when I should have?" He huffed. "Get you into purgatory?! Either you are even more stupid than I originally thought or you..."

"Please, Lee-" I interrupted. "If you do this for me I promise you won't ever hear from me again. I'll never contact you again, and neither will my brothers. You can go back up to heaven, or where ever the hell you want and do your own thing. I'll never bother you again." His hardened expression softened slightly. "Please. I can't leave him in there, Lee. I can't. I have to bring him back."

By now he was refusing to look me in the eye.

"If I could even find a way do you have any idea what you're going to find in purgatory?" He didn't wait for me to answer. "Nothing but agony and a fear of the like you've never felt before. You will like a thick juicy steak being waved in front of a pack of starving rabid animals. It will be constant chaos, Lara- You wouldn't be able to stop for even a fraction of a second. And what if you get there and Castiel is dead? What then?"

"He's not dead. I know he's not." I replied.

He snickered. "Yes well I suppose you would know. Or you think you know."

"Will you do it or not? Look I know this could definitely end up badly. I might even get ripped to shreds but it's my life and I have to try."

This was the first time the snarky and cocky mask he always adorned actually cracked. He looked panicked and even upset.

"Give me twenty four hours." He finally replied. "I'll see what I can do."

I didn't even get the chance to thank him before he vanished. Afterwards, I needed to keep up my front so I went and grabbed some fast food. When I returned to the motel naturally Dean was pissed that I took his baby without asking- But let it slide once he noticed I remembered the pie.

As far as I was concerned 24 hours couldn't go by fast enough, and if by some miracle Lee managed to find a way in, I knew I needed to tell Sam and Dean.

So I waited until Kevin and his Mom had gone to sleep, and after Dean had drank a couple beers before making my announcement.

"Guys..." I started. "Just so ya know... Tomorrow Lee is gonna stop by and if he managed it- I'm gonna be taking a little trip to purgatory to get Cas. Cool? Ok, goodnight."

I tried to escape to the bathroom but of course Dean grabbed me.

"Wait a second..." He glared at me. "You're not serious?"

"As a heart attack." I answered.

"Are you friggin insane?! What the hell is wrong with you? You can't go into purgatory!"

I motioned for him to keep it down.

"Yes I can. And I will. I'm sorry, Dean- But this is the one time you can't stop me. I'm going, and you can either be supportive or I'll just have Lee zap me out of here when he comes tomorrow."

Sam looked stunned speechless but finally stood.

"Uh," He garbled. "I don't think you've thought this through, kiddo."

"Yeah I have. And I know it's dangerous and I'm stupid for thinking of it but I have to do it. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I knew there might have been a way to save Cas."

Deans lips were practically invisible from being cinched so tightly.

"Lara you don't know what it's like there. You won't make it." He said.

I stared up at him and shrugged. "Then I'll die trying. I'm going guys. This is my choice and I've made it."

"Sammy, talk to her. If I try anymore I'll end up clocking her and yeah... Can't be punching the hell outa my sister." Dean turned his back to me.

I glared at Sam now and was surprised to see the look on his face was perfectly calm.

"Dean- She's an adult, one that's fully capable of making her own decisions. And, you and I both know that if we try to stop her from doing this... She'll never forgive us."

"Least she'd be alive to hate us." Dean retorted.

"Would she really be?" Sam shook his head. "Yeah, uh- I don't think she would. This is something she's gotta do, Dean. And we can't stop her."

It was in that exact moment that I knew Sam was somehow relating with me. Yeah he had always been more understanding but this was different. I knew he was thinking if it was someone he cared about that was in this situation, Amelia for instance, then he would drag himself through hellfire an back if it meant saving her. Which is what I was content with doing.

Dean wasn't going to win this one, no matter what he said or did. And he obviously knew that.

"If you're goin-" He muttered. "There's some things you need to know first." Finally he turned back to face me. "Cas won't be easy to find. So don't even bother searching. The second you step foot in that place you start praying. Pray your ass off cause he can hear it. If he'll come to anyone it'll be you."

I nodded. "Ok, anything else?"

"Yeah. If your senses are tellin you something then they're definitely right. Don't bother questioning it and start running. And, there's some pretty crafty sons a bitches in that place that'll try to trick you, or play the sympathy card crap. Don't give anyone a chance to talk, just cut their fucking heads off. No hesitating in there, kid- Not even for a second. You see a monster, you kill it, no matter what it is. Even if it's a kid, it don't matter, you kill it."

Yet again I nodded as he turned for his duffel bag and pulled out a pretty messed up looking weapon. It seemed to have been carved out of pure obsidian, and it looked sharp as hell.

"And you'll need this-" He added, holding it out to me. "It's got a good length to it, and a decent heft. Not too heavy so you should be able to swing it."

I took it from it and got the feel for it in my hands. "Thank you, Dean."

"Don't thank me-" He flopped back down in his chair and cradled his beer. "Just get in there and get the hell out as fast as possible, got it?"

"Yeah... Got it."


	79. Chapter 79

**_Chuck is god, no one will convince me otherwise lol_**

* * *

Lee approached the closed door, letting out a deep breath before giving a firm knock. Why he even bothered with such an action still baffled him- His Father would have known he was there the second he appeared.

"Come in." A voice called out from the inside.

Lee pushed the door open, taking a moment before entering to bow his head in respect.

"Hey, Lee-" His Father said, sitting up to peer at him from over the computer screen monitor. "What brings you here?"

Lees eyes immediately fell to the half empty bottle of whiskey on the desk, along with the disheveled upkeep of the home. His Father, now, that was an entirely different story. No matter how many decades passed he couldn't allow himself to grow accustomed to the scruffy beard, the dark circles under his eyes and the obsession with pornographic magazines.

"Father, you know I respect you, but really... When are you going to drop this facade?" Lee said, sitting down in front of his desk. "How long are you going to masquerade around as a prophet called Chuck?"

Chuck only snickered as he continued typing. "Technically the prophet Chuck is dead, remember? Uh... Kevin sort of took my place." He leaned back in his chair and shrugged. "So you're here because you need something, I didn't call you, so- What is it?"

Lee sighed. "I'm sure you could guess why it is I'm here."

Chuck grinned. "Lara sent you? Again? What's the reason this time?" When Lee only scowled his smile faded. "She's an interesting little thing, I'll give her that. Never would have figured she'd have that much of an influence on people."

"What she wants this time is too much to ask for though, Father."

"And what is it?" By now Chuck had begun typing again.

"She... Wants to go into purgatory. To retrieve Castiel."

Chucks movements ceased as he moved only his eyes upwards. "Really? And what did you tell her?"

"I told her I would see what I could do. I made no promises."

"Hm-" Chuck yet again resumed the typing. "Well, you should have told her that you'd do it."

"What? Are you serious?"

"Well, yeah- I mean, it kinda has to play out as it should."

"What do you mean?"

Sighing, Chuck reached for his half empty bottle and took a nice long gulp. "Future events, pretty important, Lee. Castiel has to be involved in it."

Lee sat up straight. "What future events are you referring to?"

"Something important. Don't worry, it's not for a little while."

"And Castiel absolutely must play a part in it?"

"Afraid so." He nodded. "Only way it'll work as it should. So, she wants to get into purgatory, we'll just send her there."

"I'm sorry, but... I didn't think there was a safe way?"

"I'm God-" Chuck retorted, shrugging. "I can kinda do whatever I want. So here's what you're gonna have to do. There's a few ingredients she'll need that you need to grab. Shouldn't be too hard if you search through my pantry."

"Your pantry, you mean the one in heaven?"

"That's right."

Lee grumbled as he pulled himself from the chair. "Alright, give me the list. I'll fetch them."

Chuck started writing down on a post it note, afterwards giving it a good once over before handing it to Lee. After Lee had read what was written he arched a brow.

"Just what sort of spell is this?" He asked.

"A pretty damn potent one, it'll open a special door for her so she could get in purgatory- then she has to repeat the same spell to open the exit. Don't worry, I'll explain it more after you've grabbed everything." He waved his hand. "Ok, so... Go- I've got a lot of writing to do."

Lee simply rolled his eyes before vanishing. And once Chuck was alone he let out a chuckle.

"Oh, you Winchesters, really? I never know what you're gonna do next."

* * *

Twenty four hours felt more like a friggin lifetime, and I'm sure for Sam and in particular, Dean- It wasn't near long enough.

Dean had kept pretty quiet the majority of the night and day, but he still took the time to pack me a backpack of supplies.

"Ok-" He said, waving me over. "You got a few bottles of water and some protein bars. Somethin light that won't weight you down. Go sparingly with em, kid- Cause if you run out, you're screwed. Trust me, it ain't easy to find things edible in that place."

"Yeah, I didn't think so-" I smiled. "Thanks."

I knew Dean was mad at me and wasn't the least bit happy with this decision at all- And I couldn't help but wonder why he wasn't trying to stop me. I was surprised he hadn't tried to lock me in a closet or the trunk of his car by now. Who knows, maybe he was finally starting to realize that while yes, I might be his little sister, I was old enough to make my own choices. Or, maybe in a way he actually agreed with me and wanted Cas back just as badly as I did.

When Lee finally decided to poof to the room the knot in my stomach finally faded.

He didn't bother saying hello to anyone- Especially to a very startled Kevin and Mrs Tran. He simply walked over to the table and shoved what was on top onto the floor. Which just so happened to be our duffel bag and Sams empty laptop case.

"Lara, come here." He commanded.

I approached and didn't have the chance to speak before he grabbed my wrist and cut a gash into my palm. He filled a small glass vial with my blood then sat it aside.

"What was that for?" I asked.

"Pay close attention." He said instead of answering. "This spell must be done to the exact once you're ready to leave purgatory. If you slip up even a little bit or lose one of the ingredients then you're stuck there, understand?"

I nodded. "I get it."

"Just what is this spell?" Sam asked.

"It's called a blood spell. Meaning that whenever you travel back from your destination it will automatically send you straight back to where you've left your blood mark." He glared at my brothers. "So don't lose that vial or else Lara won't make it back."

"We won't lose it." Dean scowled. "Anything else we gotta do?"

"No. You oafs just need to stay out of the way." He yet again grabbed me and yanked me over, then pulled a small black box from his satchel. It was shiny like polished glass, and had gold etchings in the corners. "Those are the ingredients to return. Protect them with your life. And once you've reached the highest altitude in purgatory you will need to combine every ingredient in the bowl here." He held up an intricately carved stone bowl. "After they're combined you're to draw a sigil with a mixture of yours and Castiels blood. Recite the incantation to the exact and once the door opens and you step through, you must hold onto him with all your strength. It will return _you_ to the blood mark, but not him which is why you need to clamp on and not let go. Understand?"

My head was spinning with anticipation. "Ok, got it. What's the incantation?"

Instead of telling me with words he lied his hand on my forehead and it sounded like a freight train rolling in my skull. The words flooded inside so fast it reminded me almost like a voice recording on fast forward. When he pulled away I stumbled slightly.

"Do you have it?" he asked.

I thought for a moment and felt my brows arch in surprise. I could see the incantation perfectly as though it was something I had memorized ages ago. Along with the sigil I needed to draw.

"I have it." I answered.

"Good, don't speak it. And don't utter it to Castiel because the little bugger doesn't know what this is, and he might try to find some way of sending you back without him. Keep it to yourself."

I looked to Sam and Dan and they both held the same expression. Fear.

Lee started mixing a different set of ingredients in another bowl then drew the same sigil on the table with my blood. After muttering the incantation which didn't at all sound Enochian to me, he hovered his hand over the sigil and then glanced back at my brothers.

"Unless you want to get sucked into the doorway I suggest moving." He said.

Sam and Dean moved out of the way and stood on the opposite side of the room. I was quick to grab my backpack and weapon after checking nearly ten times that the ingredients were in there with my rations.

"Are you ready, Lara?" Lee asked. "God made this possible, so there's no turning back now."

"I'm ready."

"Be careful, kid." Dean said. "And hurry your ass back here."

"Bring Cas back too." Sam added. "It hasn't been the same without him."

I smiled to both of them and then nodded to Lee. "Ok, do it."

"Once you're pulled in no matter how painful it is, run as fast as you can. You'll eventually reach the exit but it won't be a pleasant journey." He hovered his hand over the sigil still. "Don't get your stupid ass killed in there."

He finally slammed his palm down on the sigil, and afterwards the room shook with a loud crack that followed suit. Next came a flashing of blue light. On the wall beside me I could see it swirling almost like a whirlpool until a gaping lightning streaked doorway appeared.

Wind whipped around all of us in a violent frenzy and Lee shouted. "Go!"

Without hesitating I ran straight into the portal and didn't look back.


	80. Chapter 80

It felt like walking through a wall of fire and lightning- I screeched the entire way, wondering if by the time I made it through the portal if I would have any skin left. I made sure to keep the weapon Dean gave me clenched in my hand tightly- If I somehow dropped it during the way through the portal then I would be beyond screwed. It felt like miles as I hurried my pace to what I was certain was a fast sprint. Finally, as the heat and pain was more than I could tolerate anymore I suddenly felt the ground disappear from beneath my feet as I went tumbling towards the earth with a crunch.

For a moment I could only lie there in the dirt, relishing the wind, the trees, feeling my skin stop pricking like a billion bee stings. The air worked back into my lungs, my heart finally began to slow- And my eyes adjusted to the strange sort of glowy light that surrounded me.

"This..." I pulled myself to my feet, staring at the thick dense forest around me. "Is Purgatory?"

Strange- I would have expected something more along the lines of chains, blood falling from the black sky, thunder crashing and booming- But, despite the eerie glow to this place- Purgatory actually was pretty damn normal. Although, the air did smell strange, not normal, but I guess that's what strange usually pertained to, huh? I couldn't describe it. It didn't quite smell artificial as it did just... I don't know. Musty perhaps, and yet fresh at the same time with a slight hint of metallic floating about in random gusts. Yeah, lemme just say it wasn't within my vocabulary to actually form a coherent observation about this place.

For the moment, there were no creepy crawlies, but I knew that wouldn't last long. Both Dean and Lee had told me that it wouldn't take but a few minutes before the monsters here picked up on my scent and came after me. Which meant I had to either keep moving, or sit and wait to be swarmed.

Finding Cas was going to be impossible. Dean told me that, which didn't give me much hope- So he said the only option I had was to pray... Which is what I did.

* * *

Castiel had stopped fleeing hours ago, somehow managing to elude the Leviathans that were chasing him. He was tired of killing, tired of running, but he knew that this was his penance- The only way to prove to God, to everyone that meant something to him, and to himself- That he was agonizingly sorrowful for the horrible crimes he had committed.

Still he ached at his very core at the thought of never seeing his friends again- Of never seeing her again. It had taken him this long to finally come to the conclusion that the Winchesters, that Lara, were more than just friends or family. Dean and Sam would forever be considered his brothers. But with Lara it went well past what friendship could ever be, past anything that could actually be formed into words. There were no words, no way to describe it.

But he had tried his best not to think of her, of any of them- Since the moment Dean escaped Purgatory. He vowed to himself that he would remain in this god forsaken place until he either was devoured by the Leviathans that hunted him, or he gave up and took his own life. That was his only option now.

He lingered by the stream just as he always did- For some odd reason no creatures ever sought him out there. And he was somewhat thankful. Had this place not been bursting at the seams with flesh eating monsters, it would have been considered very serene and peaceful. The river, the forest beyond- Was actually quite beautiful.

But, the one thing he never expected, the one thing that could chill him to the bone and force such foreign emotions to rush through him, suddenly happened. He heard her voice.

_Cas... It's Lara. I don't know if you can hear me- Dean said that when he was here he prayed to you and you heard him. Yeah, I'm sure you're probably confused right now, but. I'm here... In Purgatory._

Suddenly a fear he had never felt shot up his spine like pin pricks, he went stiff- His eyes widened as he wondered if perhaps he was losing his mind again, or- If maybe somehow he was being deceived.

_Anyways. I don't know how it works here. I don't even know if you can zap yourself to wherever I am or if you can even sense where I am. So, I'll just start describing landmarks that maybe you would know, huh? OK, so... Let's see..._

He was starting to panic now, his eyes darting every which way, his pace quickening as he left the river behind and entered the forest on foot.

_Alright, well- Big surprise but there's a shit ton of trees, but I'm standing in a pretty big clearing actually. I can see past the forest line and there seems to be some sort of rock structure a few miles in the distance. A tall pointed peak with a second beside it that's smaller. Yeah, I know. I suck at describing this place but I've only been here like fifteen minutes and it all looks the same._

He couldn't sense her, but that wasn't surprising- He hadn't been able to sense Dean either. This place was different, this place was the pure definition of hell in every sense of the word. It didn't help matters that both Dean and Lara had their ribs inscribed with Enochian warding sigils.

_I'm moving again- Ah, ok. Yeah I see now. There's a hill leading downwards, looks like a river. I'll start down that..._

He listened to the deafening silence between the moments she was praying to him.

_Ok, down by the river where I am there's like ten huge boulders all piled along each other on the bank... Wait a second... I think I heard something behind me in the trees._

Run, he wanted to tell her. Start running! But he couldn't- There was no way he could.

_There's something coming, Cas- I don't know if you know where I am or not, or even if you could get here, but I could really use some backup. This doesn't sound good. I'm running, in case you're wondering and I just passed what looks like a man-made, or monster-made structure. Maybe a shelter of some kind._

Instantly he knew where she was after that one statement and quickly zapped himself to that particular area of riverbank.

* * *

I was surrounded, fuck, yeah I knew this was going to happen- But it was to be expected. It was a group of gangly and pretty raggedy looking vamps, and they were each eying me like I was a thick juicy steak. I had taken down one of them already, his head was lying five feet away from his body- And that definitely hadn't motivated them to leave me alone.

It was a stare down challenge apparently as we turned slow circles. I was waiting for one of them to charge at me, or all of them at once. I was screwed, no more than that- I was going to be ripped to shreds and eaten by these bastards. I had one weapon, I was one person, they were five and the fact that they hadn't tasted human blood in who knows how long was worth the risk of getting their heads hacked off I guess.

When they charged at me, I started swinging. A petite blonde girl with a shredded dress was the next to lose her head, as her body fell with a thud on the ground. The remaining four, all men, were huge and overbearing- And the site of them was enough to make me want to piss my pants. In a flash all four of them dove at me and we crashed to the ground and rolled slightly downhill towards the water. I swung my blade of course, as the edge became embedded into the side of one mans skull. But now I was stuck, and pinned down- Trying my best to fight off three blood thirsty freaks with what felt like two tons of pressure on me.

Out of no where a pair of hands suddenly reached down and with a firm yank one mans head was ripped clean off his shoulders. Another was picked up and tossed like a rag doll clear across the river. The third mans face suddenly began to melt with a flash of bright white light that shot out through his eye sockets. Once it was over and every man there was dead, I pulled myself to my feet and could only stare in shock as Castiel stood in front of me.

His expression I guarantee was the same as my own. Just complete surprise, mixed with relief. Although, there was a look to his eyes that couldn't quite be explained.

I didn't wait for him to move, I moved closer and wrapped my arms around him- Squeezing so tightly if he hadn't of been an angel he probably would have complained from the discomfort. I didn't expect for him to hug me back, that just wasn't in his nature- So I was pleasantly surprised when his arms awkwardly worked their way around me gently.

When I finally pulled away I couldn't help but run my hand sarcastically across his facial hair.

"Nice beard." I said, trying to break the tension.

"What are you doing here, Lara?" He asked. Nope, he didn't sound at all happy but I hardly expected him to.

"What do you think I'm doing here?" I snickered. "I'm here to get your ass out of Purgatory."

His eyebrows scrunched, and that expression was enough to make me giddy like a school girl, that is- Until I realized it wasn't from confusion, but something else.

"I can't leave here, Lara." He said. "You shouldn't have come."

I nodded. "Yeah, I figured you might say that- But, tough- Because I'm here and you can't exactly refuse to come with me because if you don't leave with me, then I'll just stay here with you."

He shook his head. "No, you're leaving. I won't let you remain here."

"You can't make me leave."

"Yes, I can..." He took a few steps forward. "Even if I have to throw you through the portal myself."

Now I smiled, and judging by the confusion on his face that wasn't the response he was expecting.

"Yeah, about that-" I shrugged. "Seems as though I can't go through that portal, because technically I'm not human. Remember, Mother's a Seraphim?"

Ok yeah I was winging it with that one. But I could only assume that was right, since really I wasn't exactly _human _human.

Now he looked like he was starting to panic. "Then... How..."

"Lee told me how to get out. Which means, I'm the only one that knows the super secret spell, and if you don't come with me- Then I'll just stay here with you."

His jaw clenched. "If that's the case- Then I'll just read your mind, find out the spell myself and send you back without me."

"Then I'll just come back. Face it, Cas- I'm not leaving this pit without you. So, one way or the other, you're coming with me."

He was clearly getting frustrated. "I'm not leaving here, Lara. I _deserve _to be here- After everything I've done- All of the damage I've caused not only on earth but in heaven- I need to be punished. _This _is my punishment, to spend eternity here."

My arms crossed and I glared at him. "No. You don't think this is your punishment. This is just the easy way out for you. A way for you to ignore the shit that happened instead of facing it and fixing it like you should do! Stop wallowing in your own self pity, Cas- And take some fucking responsibility for your actions! You feel bad for what happened? Then _fix it_."

His mouth cinched to practically invisible, but somehow he didn't deny my accusations. Probably because I was spot on, and he couldn't argue with it. I was completely right. This wasn't his way of punishing himself, it was his way of hiding.

"Regardless of what you think my reasons are, Lara- You're still leaving here without me."

"No I'm not." I quickly retorted.

He shifted on his feet, he looked ready to spit fire. And I knew I wasn't going to influence him to leave here by arguing with him. No, it was time to bring out the big guns and show him how serious I was. So... I moved to stand in front of him, and because of the slight hill I stood on I was even with his eyes. I put my arms around him pulling him close, and finally kissed him.

So, so many months of actually wanting to do that- But never having the nerve because, really- He was an angel. I mean, it's not like he was a normal guy. I had no expectations from him, I didn't expect him to profess his undying love for me, I didn't expect him to suddenly morph into a normal man, with normal feelings and actions. I knew that if ever there was a time that anything would happen between us then it would rely on my actions alone, because he certainly wasn't going to do it. And I was just fine with that. I was perfectly content with the way things were just knowing that we might have felt the same way about each other. Even if no words were ever spoken and nothing ever happened. I didn't care. It was a mutual attachment, one that was known simply just by the both of us existing. He would die for me, and I would die for him. And that was enough.

Of course he didn't know what to do, and didn't seem to know where to put his hands. In a way it reminded me of two kids on the playground. An innocent enough act, but underneath it lied a multitude of emotions and feelings that couldn't be explained. By the time I pulled away he had only just lied both hands on the lower part of my back, and even that seemed to be completely inappropriate for him... Silly angel...

When I looked into his eyes afterwards, the anger and sadness had completely faded, but the surprise and awe certainly hadn't.

"Now-" I said, with a slight smirk, my hand still cupping his cheek. "Are you going to come with me or not?"

He swallowed a few times over before nodding. "Of course."

Wow, had I known how powerful a kiss would be then I would have done that minutes ago instead of just arguing with him.

I grabbed his hand, and he entwined his fingers with my own and we started walking.

"Ok, so this spell-" I said, trying to cool myself off. "It has to be preformed on the highest altitude possible. Do you know where that is?"

He led the way down the riverbank, pulling me along with him. "Yes, it's near the portal Dean passed through."

"Can you blip us there? Or..."

"Unfortunately no. Just moving myself from place to place extinguishes a great amount of energy." He slowed to a stop. "This place, it's unexplainable. Angels weren't meant to be in Purgatory, so it affects my abilities."

"Well I didn't expect for it to be that easy-" I sighed. "How long will it take to walk there?"

"Without stopping, which you couldn't do, it would take three days. But, since you'll require sleep- Possibly a week, depending on our luck. It's a guarantee that we'll be ambushed more than once during the journey."

"So basically you're saying you don't know how long it'll take?"

He shrugged, and the gesture almost made him seem human, just almost. "Basically."

"Yeah, like I said- I didn't expect for this to be easy."


	81. Chapter 81

Night time in Purgatory was horrifying- Not only was there just a creepy vibe in general but it was unnerving hearing twigs snapping around you and not being able to see what might have been hiding in the darkness.

During the hours that we had been walking together we had been ambushed twice. First by more vampires, then by... I don't even know what the hell they were. All I know was that they had a mouth full of long fangs, yellow eyes and wanted to chew my face off. But with Cas and I both fighting them together they didn't last long. Granted, I wasn't very helpful because I wasn't used to being swarmed by several monsters all at once. But Cas had my back, and if it got to the point where I couldn't control what was happening he was right there to tare their heads off.

So far so good, I hadn't been torn apart yet- And Cas could keep going and going without tiring. So if I was going to be stuck in monsterville- Then I guess the best case scenario would be to be trapped with an angel.

Who knows what time it was, there was no way of knowing in this place. But Cas decided, not me, that it was time for us to stop and let me rest.

He knew of a small cave like structure that Dean and Benny had stayed in during their way to the portal. It was empty, thankfully- But still completely black inside, which I didn't much care for. And there was no chance of building a fire, it was too risky. Not that I knew how anyways- I'm not frickin Macgyver who could start fires, or kill a bear with a piece of string and a straw.

I sat down on the ground, leaning against the small cubby spaces wall and tried to adjust my eyes to the darkness. Cas was standing at the entrance like a watch dog, refusing to take his eyes off whatever might have been lingering outside. Once he deemed it safe for the moment, he finally turned away.

"I've not had the chance to ask how you've been- Or how Dean and Sam are." He said.

A quiet snicker escaped my throat. "They're... Well, they're the way they always are, I guess. I dunno, Cas- Something's strange... During the year you and Dean were stuck here, I was working like hell trying to figure out where you were. Sam? He just completely disappeared, he didn't even call me for months."

"Why?" Even in the darkness I could see his squinty eyes.

I patted the spot next to me for him to sit, which he did.

"He met some chick, ran over a dog- I dunno, the whole thing's weird to me. Yeah, I can understand him wanting a girlfriend, a normal life- But he just walked away and didn't even bother to help me find you guys." I shuddered. "There was just something so cold about it all."

"And now?"

"Now- It's as though things just snapped back to normal. Yeah, Sam still insists that he's gonna go back to this girl, but I think you and I both know that it won't happen. Sam and Dean are glued at the hips. They can't live without each other, and Sam can't _not _be a Hunter. It's just not possible."

"What about you?" He shifted slightly, staring down at me.

I sighed. "What about me?"

"It's been over a year since I've seen you. Has there been any further symptoms of the spell deteriorating?"

"Not really. Every now and then the nausea and headaches come back, but it doesn't last very long. But, other than that- No teleporting myself anywhere, no singed clothes, nothing else." Now I looked up at him. For the moment I decided against telling him what Lee had given me. "So, I can't even imagine what it's been like for you- Stuck here for over a year, the majority of the time by yourself."

His face went emotionless as he stared blankly ahead at nothing.

"It hasn't been a pleasant experience." He replied.

"I wouldn't think so-" I reached over and took his hand. "You're not gonna try to weasel your way outa this are you? Like, wait til the last second before the spell is complete and then zap away, are you?"

"No-" He shook his head, tightening his grip on my hand. "I won't do that." I let out a relieved sigh after that. "You should rest now. I'll watch over you."

He was right, I needed to sleep- I could barely keep my eyes open. So I lied my head on his shoulder and made sure to keep a tight grip on his hand so he couldn't even think about disappearing on me.

* * *

I awoke the next morning with an incredibly stiff neck, and still just as exhausted as when I had went to sleep. Somehow the night was quiet, no altercations or drooling monsters- And Cas had stayed in the same position until I finally opened my eyes. My hand was still gripping his, my head was still on his shoulder- And he was still staring blankly off at nothing.

When I finally snapped out of it long enough to know what was going on, I started going through the backpack I brought with me and pulled out a protein bar and bottled water. I was gonna have to go easy on my rations, I didn't think it would take over a week to get to wherever I needed to be to preform the spell- And I only packed enough water and food for a few days at the most. I couldn't exactly lug around a huge heavy duffel bag with me when I'm trying to avoid being slaughtered.

Cas had returned to the opening of the cubby space, as I inhaled my supposed breakfast. I found it funny how what happened between us the day before didn't create any awkwardness. Me, I could handle it- But Cas wasn't a normal guy, as I've said a million times before. And the simplest things seemed to make his eyes shifty and send him fleeing like from a burning building. I dunno- Maybe it was just something that needed to happen a long time ago.

"Hungry?" I asked sarcastically.

"No." He paused a moment before realizing I was joking. "We should leave now, Lara. If we linger too long we'll be discovered."

I zipped my backpack closed and lugged it over my shoulder, making sure to remember to grab my blade. We left the makeshift cave shortly after, starting on our second day of traveling.

Hours and hours passed that felt more like weeks dragged out. Monster after monster swamped us and were taken down. I couldn't help but ask myself just how in the hell did Dean stay sane in the place for ever a year? How could Cas simply zap around from area to area, never stopping, not even bothering to let his best friend know that he was still alive. How was it that Purgatory somehow had the ability to make someone change so absolutely?

The scenery never changed much the longer we walked. It was just mile after mile of forests and rocky crags that jutted out of the ground like an eyesore. Where we were heading was in the complete opposite direction as the river- Which meant if I ran out of bottled water, I was screwed. When night time came around yet again, I insisted that we keep going to make good time- Cas of course argued. He didn't want me weakened, for obvious reasons. But also because while he was an angel, he did have his limitations here in Purgatory, which meant that it relied on both of us to fight. There were no caves this time around, no form of shelter to somewhat protect us, and our only choice was to camp under a grove of trees with a rock wall at our backs. At least we could rest assured that no one would be able to sneak up behind us.

I tried to make myself as comfortable as possible on the rock covered ground, feeling dozens of pointy edges jabbing into my butt- Yeah it was no first class hotel, but I didn't care. Cas didn't seem to want to sit this time around, since we were out in the open, not surrounded by some sort of shield he was more on edge, and honestly- Seeing him so jumpy was making me want to piss my pants. So I tried to take my mind off of it by munching on half of another protein bar. I was starving to death and would kill for a burger and some beer, but unfortunately Purgatory didn't have many diners.

"Cas-" I said, and he peered at me from over his shoulder. "Do you think it's safe enough to sit for ten seconds? You're making me nervous."

He nodded and sat beside me as I rifled through my backpack. He obviously caught a glimpse of the small stone bowl Lee had given me, along with the box that held the ingredients for the spell.

"Can I ask what all goes into this spell, Lara?"

My eyes shot up to his and I quickly closed my bag. "Uh, I think I'll just keep that to myself for now."

"Why? Do you still believe that I would run away?"

"Not necessarily, but I'm not taking any chances."

"Lara-" He looked at me sternly. "You can trust me. I wouldn't think of leaving you here in this place alone."

Damn that baby faced expression, he could get me to do anything if he just looked at me the right way.

I unzipped the bag again and held up the three small glass vials that were inside the box. He examined them for a moment, taking one from my hand and holding it to the moonlight.

"Interesting. Cremated remains of a fallen angel, these are very hard to come by-" He took the second and third vile, shaking their contents. "A crushed leaf from the tree of life, another very difficult item to come by." The third he examined more closely, his brows furrowed. "I can't identify this."

We both stared at the vile, and the the shimmering gold liquid inside glistened in the moonlight.

"Yeah, I'm not exactly sure what that is either. Lee wasn't very eager to divulge any info."

"I'm also not familiar with whatever sort of spell this is, Lara. Are you certain it's accurate?"

"Better be-" I shrugged. "Seeing is that it came from God himself."

After hearing that he seemed to be even more cautious at how he handled the vials.

"It came directly from God?" If it was at all possible he looked to have gone pale.

"Yep-" I took the vials and placed them back in their protective box. "Guess you can rest assured that you're still Gods favorite angel, huh?"

He was stunned into silence, his eyes fell away from mine as he stared off blankly into the dark forest.

"How did you manage this?" He asked.

"Well, I asked Lee for starters. He said he didn't know of a way to get me into Purgatory, so he asked big Daddy."

"You certainly have a way of influencing, Lara." He looked at me with a slight smile. "One of your many talents."

A slight smirk crept across my face. "Oh, you haven't even begun to experience some of my _other _talents." He looked at me, not seeming to understand what I meant for a good fifteen seconds, then his eyes slightly widened. "Yeah. I'm talking about _that_." He was stunned into silence. "Unfortunately we'll have to wait until we get outa here for that though."

He didn't look frightened so much as he seemed to be a little intrigued, and it was disappointing that we were stuck in this terrible place. Plus there was always the fact that since he was an angel something like that wasn't really on his mind often, or at all. At least I didn't think it was.

Unfortunately our moment was interrupted by a snapping of twigs. Cas quickly leapt to his feet, as did I- And I readied my blade.

Judging by the sounds in the trees, it seemed as though we were being surrounded.

"Stay near me at all times." He commanded. "Don't try to run, just stay behind me."

He instinctively reached back and latched onto my hand, as if he thought I might just run away. After pulling me close the trees parted and from what I could tell in the darkness- Eight figures approached. What they were, I had no idea- But I could hear a deep growl coming from several of their throats.

Cas didn't wait for them to make a move before raising his hand and enveloping them in a bright white light. It was the first time I didn't shield my eyes and watched the creatures disintegrate into nothing. Once they were gone, he grabbed my backpack and began to pull me away.

"We need to move-" He stated. "More creatures will have sensed what happened."

That was the understatement of the year. With how much he blasted those things every monster within a one hundred mile radius would have felt it. So we took off at a quick jog through the trees, and I had a hard time seeing which way was what in the darkness. Luckily though Cas had pretty good bearings in the pitch black, so I simply followed his lead.

We ran until I could barely breathe anymore, and of course he wasn't the slightest bit winded. My sides were aching and it was just the perfect time for my head to start pounding from the damn spell deteriorating. Before long my legs collapsed from under me and I fell to my knees, holding my head.

"No, no." I said, cringing from the pain. "N-Not now."

Cas knelt down beside me and tried to pull my face out of my hands.

"Lara, what is it?"

"Spell..." I forced out.

I pulled my face out of my hands long enough to see the veins in my wrists glowing, Cas as well noticed and didn't quite know what to do. When I looked up, I nearly fell backwards.

"I can see your true face again-" I murmured. "It's so damn bright."

Even though it wasn't really, it seemed as though his true form was glowing up the entire area like a freakin spotlight. I only forced myself to ignore it when I heard snaps coming from the trees again.

He grabbed me and pulled me to my feet, not giving me the chance to croak out a response before he scooped me up and started running. I'm not sure how long he ran, because I was going in and out of consciousness, but when I finally managed to keep my eyes open the sky was starting to brighten with sunrise. By the time we stopped we were under an embankment of what looked like a washed out indention in the rock wall. He sat me down gently and triple checked to make sure we had lost whatever was chasing us.

I tried to blink away the haze as the image of his true form began to fade and his vessel became more clear.

"Perfect timing, huh?" I asked sarcastically, relieved that the pain in my head was gone. "I guess you're pretty ticked off at me right now?"

He crouched down underneath the small space. "Why would I be angry?"

"I dunno-" I sighed, and sat up a little. "Because this is probably the most danger you've been in since you got to this place. I have a tendency to screw things up."

He shook his head. "No, it's dangerous here regardless of your presence. Believe me, this isn't uncommon."

"Maybe the running for your life part, but lugging me around certainly is."

He moved some brush to partly block where we sat.

"Lara- I chose to be your guardian long before you ever arrived here. And, according to what Leesander stated, you apparently chose me as well. Fate and destiny is a confusing thing at times- I'm just thankful that my own happened to be this."

I couldn't help but chuckle. "Keep talking like that and you won't have any lips left."

He didn't understand what I meant obviously, so I grabbed him by the collar and pulled him into a second kiss. This one last much longer than the first, mainly because I hadn't stunned him into going stiff like a board. When I finally pulled away I could barely catch my breath and my shirt was clenched tightly in his fist. His eyes were closed, and if I had to guess he actually seemed disappointed the moment was over.

Sighing deeply, I shook my head. "I hate Purgatory."


	82. Chapter 82

Dean thumped his beer bottle down on the table, running his hand down his face.

"This... This is the stupidest thing we've ever done-" He said. "We shouldn't have let her go."

"Yeah, Dean-" Sam rolled his eyes. "Like we would actually stand a chance at stopping her."

"How long's it been?"

Sam checked the calender on his phone. "Going on 96 hours."

"Dammit... This is takin to friggin long." He stood and began to pace. "I shoulda gone with her, I shouldn't have let her go alone. The stupid kid doesn't know the first thing about purgatory."

"But Cas does." Sam shrugged. "She would have found him by now. If she prayed to him, like you said she could do, he woulda showed up in two seconds, you know that."

"Maybe..." Still he paced. "But this was still a stupid idea."

"She couldn't leave him there-" Sam sat back in his chair. "They have something, Dean... Something that we can't understand. They can't be apart, that's the fact of the matter."

"Ok Romeo, knock it off with that."

Sam chuckled. "Just tellin it like it is, man. You know it, I know it... Stop being in denial."

"It's not denial-" Dean froze. "It just... I dunno, it creeps me out I guess."

"Why?"

"Cause it's our sister, and it's Cas. I mean, comon- Doesn't that seem a little weird to you?"

Sam shrugged, shirking off the question. "Not really. I mean, technically, she's an angel too."

"That don't make it any less gross." Dean cringed. "Do you think they've... Ya know?"

Now Sam cringed. "Ugh, man- I don't wanna think about that."

"You think they have? Don't you?"

"Ughhh-" Sam grumbled with his face in his hands. "I don't know, and... I don't really wanna know either."

Deans brows furrowed. "Nah... They haven't. I woulda known if they had."

"How?" Sam brought his face out of his hands. "They've been alone hundreds of times. Especially when you were pissed at Lara and made Cas babysit her."

Deans face went completely blank. "Oh god, you've totally just ruined babysitter porn for me... Thanks a lot."

"Can we change the subject please?" Sam stood and moved to sit on the end of the bed, flicking the tv on. "Just, sit down and watch cartoons or something... Take your mind off of that, please."

Dean grumbled his way to the second bed and sat down. "If she's not back in the next day or so..."

"Dean-" Sam glared at him. "She'll be here. Just... Try not to think about it."

Dean rolled his eyes and stared at the tv screen, barely aware of what was even playing on it. Sometimes he really wanted to punch Sam in the neck, especially when he was so nonchalant about everything. How he could think Lara was well and fine in purgatory was starting to scare him.

* * *

I was as rested as I was ever gonna be. With the stupid spell deciding to bite me in the ass now of all times, I didn't have the luxury of taking a load off for a few days to let it slide. I faked strength, which I don't think Cas fell for, but considering we couldn't stay in one place for long we started off again.

He seemed to be even more on guard throughout the next few days, barely taking two steps ahead of me, the rest of the time he kept his hand firmly clamped on mine. Nights were spent with me barely sleeping, and Cas refusing to sit for even a second. Something strange was going on... We couldn't understand why, but for some odd reason, we hadn't been attacked by anything for over a day. The way had been clear way too long. And that fact was more unsettling than hearing the brush around us rustling with upcoming threats. The silence was frightening, something like this didn't happen unless an even greater threat was coming.

During the middle of the fifth day we stopped just long enough for me to rifle through my backpack and notice that I was completely out of protein bars, and my last water bottle had a few gulps left, and that's it. Cas noticed my expression and tried to take a peak inside.

"What is it?"

"Nothing." I smiled and zipped the bag closed. "Just... Out of food, yay."

His brows scrunched. "You didn't pack enough?"

"Guess not. I wasn't sure how long we'd be here- And Dean told me to pack light." I stood and slung the bag back over my shoulder. "How far are we from the portal?"

He stared around the area. "Possibly two more days, depending on how much we travel."

"Hm, well I shouldn't die of starvation then."

Clearly he wasn't amused by that statement. "We should keep moving."

Before we did I let out a sigh. "What's going on around here, Cas? You'd know more than me. Why has it been so quiet?"

He shifted on his feet as his eyes darted around the forest surrounding.

"I'm not certain, but if I was to give speculation-" He paused and looked at me again. "I would say that we've attracted attention from something much more dangerous than the souls here. The reason why we're not being attacked any longer is because something is eliminating the competition."

"Something like?"

"Leviathan..." He shook his head. "They were already after me, but... They would have sensed you here now as well."

My hand gripped the strap of my backpack tightly. "Oh... Why haven't they come after us already?"

He started walking again after yet again grabbing my hand. "They're waiting for the perfect moment to strike, to catch us off guard. They're clever creatures, Lara- And before you arrived here Dean, Benny and I laid dozens of them to waste. I think they've learned by now not to underestimate us."

His tone had shifted, it seemed much darker, and somewhat sullen which instantly told me he was thinking of something I wouldn't like.

"Don't even think about it." I said, jerking him to a stop. "Just wipe that out of your head right now."

He tilted his head slightly. "What are you..."

"I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that if we get up to the top of that peak and we're ambushed, you're gonna sacrifice yourself to make sure I get out. And I'm telling you right now, don't you dare do it."

His mouth cinched as he looked away. "Lara, you don't understand..."

"No-" I interrupted. "_You_ don't. You don't get it do you? I can't do it without you. I can't, I've tried and it didn't work. If you don't get out of here, then I'm not leaving either... I don't want to. Even if it means being stuck here for the rest of my life constantly running and dodging monsters, I don't care. I would rather be here with you, then back in the real world without you."

He stared down at my hand. "And how do you think it would make me feel- If I knew _I_ was responsible for your death, Lara? I couldn't..." He trailed off, his eyes moving to the sky. "I couldn't live with that... I've wronged you so much already, if you're killed because of me..."

"If I'm not with you then I'm dead already, Cas." I interrupted. "Just face it. I don't know necessarily how you feel, but I know already that I can't do it anymore. Do you have any idea how horrible this last year has been without you? How many times I practically drove my fucking car off a bridge just so I wouldn't have to feel the emptiness anymore? I lost count." I moved closer. "But I didn't do it, only because I couldn't take the chance of maybe you're still being alive somewhere. _That's _what kept me going, _that's _why I'm not buried in a hole in the ground right now. And _that's _why I'm not going to try living without you anymore."

He couldn't seem to force any words out, he was literally stunned speechless. Normally he could at least say something, one word, but not this time. Part of me wanted to shake him, hoping something would at least rattle out, the other part was observing and studying everything about him. A part of him looked completely devastated to hear that, a part of him looked relieved. I don't know, maybe he really didn't know the impact he had on my entire existence now, maybe he thought that I was just indifferent- Or, maybe he actually had no idea at all how I felt about him? That seemed to be it, as he finally looked up at me and met my eyes.

"Had I known that from the beginning, Lara... I never would have left your side." His jaw clenched. "But you don't understand, everything that I did- The moments that I was gone, I thought I was doing it for the right reasons. You... Changed something in me, something that I can't explain. I wanted to protect you and I thought I was doing that. And here, I thought it was right because I needed to do penance for my crimes, but- I realize now that it was wrong of me to fight against Dean when he went through the portal, and it was wrong of me to insist on staying here."

"Wait a second..." I jerked his hand. "What do you mean you fought against Dean? He said that..." My eyes widened. "You did it on purpose? You stayed behind on purpose?"

His eyes filled with shame. "Like I said, I thought that this was my penance. I wasn't going to follow Dean through the portal, I had no intention of even attempting it. I only made certain that he made it there safely and went through himself, but I had no intention of going with him." He pulled me closer. "But, you need to understand that this place, it wasn't being hunted everyday worrying about being killed that I considered to be my punishment, it was being separated from you. There's no greater misery in existence as far as I'm concerned."

I stared at the ground, trying to force the knot in my throat to disappear. "So, when we leave here, and we will- What then?"

He pulled me even closer, enough so that I couldn't help but look up at him. "I don't know, Lara. Circumstances have changed drastically- But I do know that when we do return, it will be far from the way it used to be. It's stems deeper than just myself fighting along side you- And Sam and Dean- But, I do know that I have no intention of leaving again, regardless of what I am, angel or not, I'm not leaving."

"I'm tempted to make you promise that." I smirked. "Swear it in blood."

"I would if it would put your mind at ease."

Now I snickered. "I was joking, Cas. That's not necessary."

He still seemed adamant about actually doing something so drastic. But as long as I had his word then that was all that mattered.

We started off yet again through the trees, both silent but still sticking close to each other. When he suddenly stopped however I could tell by the look on his face that something was coming. And it wasn't just some little werewolf or vamp- But something big. Leviathan big.

"Run!" He shouted and took off at a fast pace, practically dragging me behind him.

We burst through a thick set of spruce trees and entered a small clearing. When he skidded to a stop in the center of it his grip tightened on my hand.

"They have us surrounded." He said. "I should have known this is what they were planning."

"Planning?" I panted.

He didn't bother to explain because there simply wasn't time, and instead took small circles before releasing my hand.

"Go-" He pointed to an area of the trees. "Keep running in that direction and I'll hold them off."

I quickly shook my head and readied my weapon. "No, we're not separating. I told you there's not going to be any of you trying to sacrifice yourself."

He was going to argue but out of the sky fell these large black blobs of ooze that slowly started to take the form of bodies. There were four in total but something told me they were just the first round.

Two came at me instantly and the others went for Cas. With a lucky shot I sliced off the first womans head but the second wasn't so easy. He was wiry and seemed to be able to anticipate my every move before I made it. I wanted to check on Cas but didn't dare take my eyes off this asshole.

He threw a punch at me and I ducked in time to not get clobbered in the face but unfortunately his fist met the side of my head, which was considerably worse.

I stumbled backwards as the world around me began to spin. He took advantage of my momentary lapse of coherence and lunged at me. We both crashed to the ground through a set of trees and started rolling down a steep hillside before thumping to a stop beside a dried up creek bed. Thankfully I landed on top and with a slice his head went flying.

For a moment I took a few deep breaths before standing and clenching my left shoulder which was injured during the tumble. And at looking up the hill we rolled down I knew I wouldn't stand a chance of making it back up quickly. The ground was dry and crumbly and there was no handholds to help me up. It was also too steep to run. I listened to the silence for the moment as the fighting up above seemed to have ceased.

Fuck it, I thought- I'm climbing it anyhow and ignored the objection my injured shoulder gave me. Whether it was the rush of adrenaline that gave me a boost or something else, I didn't know- But I made it up the hill with very little issues. Once I reached steady ground again I pushed back through the trees and into the clearing. Past the body I left behind lied another and at first glance I didn't see Cas until I heard struggling through the bushes.

After darting through I didn't even stop to think before hacking at the head of a leviathan that had Cas pinned to the ground. Once he was dead, I knelt down to see one of them had obviously chomped down on his arm which was bleeding profusely.

"Are you ok?" I asked.

He quickly pulled himself back to his feet. "I'm fine. It'll heal, it was mainly my vessel that was damaged."

But if that were so then why was he trying to hold back a painful cringe? As Cas had told me in the past, leviathan could kill angels which made me wonder if just a bite could actually harm him.

"You're hurt?" He asked, ignoring the wound on his arm.

"Yeah-" I grunted. "Think my shoulder popped out. But lemme guess, you can't really heal in purgatory?"

"I could. But it requires an excessive amount of energy here."

"Ok," I braced myself. "Then you're gonna have to pop it back in for me."

I flopped down on my knees and waited and he hesitantly joined me.

"You know how to do it right?" I asked.

"I'm familiar with it, yes- Although I've never had to do it." He let out a sigh and pressed one hand against my shoulder while supporting it with the other. "I'm sorry, Lara- This won't be pleasant."

"I know. I've had this done before. The best thing to do is pop it when the person isn't expecting it so..."

My words cut off when I heard a crunch and felt a sharp stabbing pain in my shoulder as he popped it back in. Ok so I guess he took what I said into consideration, cutting me off in mid sentence so I wouldn't expect it.

I tried to grit back the pain and took a few deep breaths to keep from cursing.

"Ok, that's better." I spat. Yeah, total bullshit and he obviously knew that. "So are there anymore levi's around?"

"I think it was just the four for now- But there will be more coming after them. Which means we need to keep moving."

He helped me to my feet and we started off again, making sure to keep a quick pace this time. By the time nightfall came yet again I was hungry enough to eat my own foot. Of course I didn't say anything though. It's not like I could pick up a phone and order Chinese food.

Thankfully this time Cas agreed that we couldn't stop to rest. We were running out of time and the area where the portal waited was still a good days travel.

I struggled to remember when I had ever been this exhausted and wondered if it was at all possible to fall asleep as you walked. I got that answer when I suddenly face planted in the dirt and awoke to Cas shaking me by my uninjured shoulder.

"Are you alright?" He asked, and I struggled to see him through the darkness. "You fainted."

Ok fainting while you walk sounded much more plausible than falling asleep so I went with that.

"I'm ok. I dunno what happened." I answered.

"I do-" He sighed. "You're exhausted, Lara- And you're dehydrated and hungry. You've barely eaten since you arrived here and you've been running the entire day without any water."

"I'll be fine. I just needed to take a breather."

"No-" He gently helped me back to my feet. "You need proper rest, we can't keep going with you so weakened."

"Ok, well then we'll just book a hotel room somewhere, honeymoon suite- With a jacuzzi and spa. I'll get a massage, you could get a facial, we'll relax and take a load off." He squinted at my sarcasm. "Cas, we don't have the time or the luxury of lazing around and letting me rest. We need to get out of here. As soon as we're out then I'll take the time to eat and sleep, ok?"

We could argue about this all day so I didn't give him the chance to do it. I took off ahead of him and he quickly followed.


	83. Chapter 83

It was well past sunrise of the next day, and thankfully was starting to get light. We had kept going the entire time and honestly, I felt like death. Cas was right. I desperately needed to rest, not to mention needing to friggin eat and drink something. But that obviously wasn't in the cards right now.

So I tried to find a way to keep my mind off of how crappy I felt by making random conversation. But Cas was pretty much preoccupied with keeping an ear open for more leviathan.

"So-" I sighed. "Random question but I realized I never have asked. You said you memorized my Moms journal... Right?"

He shifted slightly as he walked, taking a moment to glance back at me.

"Yes I did." He answered.

"Yeah well... Considering what's happened and all... What can you tell me was written in it?"

"Specifically?"

He stopped and there was a look in his eyes I tried my best to read.

"I guess anything that might have been written about me?"

He immediately looked away and yeah I knew what that meant. It meant he didn't want me to see his face as he was about to lie to me.

"There wasn't much mentioned, Lara. The majority of the writing pertained to her life in heaven and then fleeing from Michael."

I tried my best to get him to look at me which he wouldn't do.

"You don't have to lie, Cas. If you're trying to spare my feelings you don't have to." His eyes fell to the ground. "Believe me I don't think it would be any big surprise."

"I'm not so sure of that." He sighed deeply. "Are you certain you want to know?"

"I never knew her. I don't remember her. So if she said anything hurtful it won't bother me. But I do want to know. Maybe it'll be some kind of closure?"

He didn't look at all happy about whatever he was going to say.

"In the beginning it was as I said. She described her life in heaven sitting at the right hand of God- And then the fall of Lucifer and finally the extinction of her race. And as I told you in the past she met John Winchester and then became pregnant with you..." He trailed off, finally meeting my eyes. "But I didn't tell you the truth when I said the pregnancy was accidental. According to her words, God ordered it to happen- Specifically with John Winchester."

My lips parted but no words would squeak out for a good ten seconds.

"Why would he order that?"

"I don't know. Which is why I lied to you about it when you wanted me to read the journal. I had no answers and I wanted to try and find them. Since you didn't have any desire to read it yourself I thought I would have the time. But I could find nothing... I had no one to speak with about it because according to Sauriels words, only she and God knew about this."

I stared at my feet, and while yes this was disturbing to hear- Somehow I didn't think this was what he was dreading telling me.

"Ok, well great. Just another mystery, what else is new. So what else did she say?"

"Lara..."

"Just spit it out, Cas. Don't sugarcoat anything."

We started walking again but our pace had slowed.

"I thought I was in the clear when you insisted on burning the journal. I didn't think I would ever have to have this conversation with you because you were so adamant about ignoring who you really were."

I shrugged. "Yeah well I can't exactly ignore it anymore. I don't have much time left as far as the spell goes. Might as well learn what I can, huh?"

Yet again he stopped. "But this isn't something worth learning, Lara. Believe me I wouldn't hold it from you if I didn't feel it was for a good cause."

"Ok clearly she said something hurtful. I get it. Believe me I can take it. My feelings aren't hurt easily, after all Dean's my brother and he can be a butt-hole. You don't have to spare me, really."

His brows furrowed and he shook his head, what he said next I think hurt him more than it hurt me.

"She was angry that God had given her such an order. She wanted nothing to do with it _but_ because of being a faithful servant she obeyed. But... She expressed a very strong emotion towards you that, in my opinion, a Mother shouldn't feel."

"So she hated me?" He walked ahead so he could avoid my expressions and wouldn't answer that. "Ya know if you didn't wanna have this convo with me in the future, then you never shoulda told me you memorized the damn journal."

"I know. It was a grave mistake on my part for numerous reasons. The main one it ended up getting you killed."

"You're drifting off the subject, Cas. Tell me everything I need to know."

He fell silent as we walked and I didn't wanna lose my temper with him because he was obviously wanting to spare my feelings.

"All I'll say on the matter-" He finally spoke again. "Is that your birth was intentional. John Winchester knew about it as well and agreed to it, and it was as she stated all for a greater purpose. You were born for whatever reason God intended and I'm sorry but I have no idea what it is."

I kept my eyes firmly planted on the ground as we walked. It was pretty much light by this time but thanks to the canopy of trees the sun was all but blocked.

"The same thing happened with Sam and Dean. So they claimed our Dad and their Mother were pretty much pushed together by a Cupid just so they would be born, so later on they could be used as vessels. So... What the hell am I then?" I huffed. "I can't be a vessel and Lucifer is in his cage so it can't have anything to do with that. Seriously, what the hell?"

"I wish I had answers to give you." He gave me quick peaks over his shoulder. "She was angry. She expressed a certain jealousy towards you. In her words you were replacing her. God no longer care about her and instead doted on you."

"Wha..." My words trailed off as I skidded to a stop. "Well that's complete and utter horse crap. No friggin way could that be true. God doesn't give a flying rats ass about me."

He eyed me up and down. "You fail to remember that God has assisted you three times now, Lara. First by sending Leesander as a protector, then he gave the way to slow down the deterioration of your spell- And finally he gave you the means of coming here. All you had to do was ask. Do you know how incredible that is? Especially since God has been missing for so long and has ignored so many prayers?"

I gaped at him. "Cas, he's resurrected you and my brothers how many times now? And when I died, nada. He let me rot in the ground and Lee had to end up sending me back."

He let out a frustrated sigh. "Was it Leesander? How can you be so sure he wasn't ordered to do it? Remember what I said so long ago- The Seraphim never acted out of their own free will, they only did as told." Now he smiled. "There's clearly something about your bloodline that peaks gods interests. First Dean and Sam and now you. It's certainly interesting."

This topic was giving me the heebie jeebies.

"No, it's not interesting. I don't think it's our bloodline that has anything to do with it. I think it's just that God needed a few saps to do his dirty work and we were the unfortunate assholes he chose to do it. He needed weapons, Cas. And we, for some odd reason, were the ones he cursed."

Honestly it surprised me that after everything that had gone wrong, he was still so gung ho on this god thing. But he'd been an angel for like a gajillion years, so really was it so unbelievable? I guess not. But it did kinda make me wonder what would have to happen for him to finally come to the conclusion that god wasn't exactly the most helpful little scamp out there.

So yeah, not exactly the best news to hear right now while I was traipsing through purgatory. I think I knew how Dean felt after he had been resurrected. He had said that he didn't like being singled out, much less by God. And well now... I was in the same boat. I was born because God said so. What the hell kind of shit is that? Even though I didn't want to hear anymore on the matter, I knew that one of these days I would have to know everything my Mom had written. Regardless if it was painful, horrible or just plain insane.

"Anything else I should know?" I asked, as I had taken off walking again.

"Nothing of significance. Other than the incantation written, the last entry simply stated that she was going to see through her last order from God. Which was surrendering herself over to Michael." He looked on ahead. "Which apparently she did."

I actually huffed out a sarcastic chuckle. "Well, nothing like hearing touching words from my long lost dead Mother. Ya know, as cold as it is to say, it's probably better that she is dead. Because I have a feeling that she and I wouldn't have gotten along very well." I chewed my bottom lip trying to stifle my anger. "So she didn't mention Lee at all?"

His eyes squinted after that question. "Why would she have?"

"Don't know. He seems to know a lot about her, and he got super defensive when you pretty much dissed her guardians at Bobbys that one day. He tried to kick the crap out of you for it."

"Well there was no mention of him. And I'm not lying this time."

"Ok, thanks." We stopped at the edge of an embankment, and in the distance probably a couple hours hike away was a tall cliff side. "Is that it?"

"That's where the portal is, yes. But since you're not fully human it won't react to your presence. But, that's not important. We just need to get to that altitude." He answered.

"Thank god-" I paused slightly, wanting to rephrase that but shirked it off. "I'm ready to get the hell outa here."

A fire had been lit from under me now that I could see the end in site. Purgatory was a hell of a ride and I couldn't wait to get off, and I knew that once we were outa here, I couldn't wait to sit Dean down and ask him how the frick he stayed sane in this place. I had been here a week, or maybe it hadn't even been a week yet, I couldn't tell since it was hard to keep track of time- But anyhow, I was ready to go frickin bonkers. First thing I was gonna do once I got out of here was take a shower. Cause I'm sure I didn't smell very pretty after running nonstop and having monsters splatter their guts all over me.

The two hours flew by thankfully, and by the time we started climbing the hill I barely noticed how exhausted or hungry I was anymore. I was being fueled by pure anticipation and adrenaline and I practically flew past Cas and hurled myself up onto steady and level ground. He quickly followed and I tried to find the best place to paint the sigil.

Down a small makeshift trail was a rock wall, and seeing is that we were the highest it was gonna get I decided to go with that. So I darted for it and started sifting through my backpack, pulling out the stone bowl and the box which held the vials.

"Is there anything I need to do?" Cas asked.

"Actually, yeah." I stood and pulled my knife from my belt and cut a gash in his palm. He barely even flinched but did look confused. "I need to draw the sigil with a combo of mine and your blood."

He nodded slightly. "And then what?"

"Then combine the ingredients in the bowl, say the chant and viola, the door opens." I then rose a finger. "Oh, and once it's open you gotta latch onto me as tightly as possible because I'm going to be shot back to where I left my blood mark, and if you're not holding on you'll end up who the hell knows where."

"I understand."

If he did he didn't really look convinced. Who knows maybe he thought this spell or whatever wouldn't even end up being accurate.

After cutting a slice into my forearm I started in with drawing the sigil which basically looked like two swirly loops with an eye above it. Cas stared at it with his brows scrunched and shook his head.

"I don't recognize that, Lara. What is it?"

"Beats me. I didn't make it up, God did."

"It's definitely not Enochian."

I nodded. "Yeah, I didn't think so either. Maybe it's some sort of secret special God graffiti?"

Once I was through with the sigil I started in with the ingredients, only managing to pour the ashes inside before Cas grabbed my shoulder.

"Wait... They're coming." He said.

Of course they are, I thought- Because when is anything ever that easy? I grabbed my weapon and moved from the ingredients after making sure they were out of harms way. Cas had yet again began to turn circles staring up at the sky. I didn't hear or see anything but judging by his expression I could tell there was bound to be more than four this time around.

When they finally started falling out of the sky around us, my stomach actually dropped. Six, so far, and more kept coming. By the time they finally stopped there were nearly ten.

"Hurry, finish the spell, I'll try to hold them off!" He shouted.

Seeing is that I didn't have much choice in the matter I had to try- Besides, I wasn't going to to go through the doorway without him anyways, so it didn't really matter. I tried to focus on what I was doing but with all the screaming and blasting going on behind me it was a little difficult. There wasn't time to dilly dally, I wasn't going to sit around and wait for these chompers to tare us a new one. So, I finished pouring in the ingredients blurted out the chant as quickly as possible and slammed my hand down on the sigil.

The results were as the same as in the motel, except one small minor detail. Or well, not so small, and not so minor. Out of the clear blue sky lightning suddenly rained down and started zapping the leviathan that had attacked us. For a moment Cas and I could only stand there in amazement watching them slowly getting fried, it wasn't killing them but it was certainly stopping them in their tracks. Slowly but surely the door started to form on the rock wall and Cas looked back at me.

"It must have been a safety measure-" He shouted over the loud thunderous noise. "God didn't want anything else escaping purgatory with us!"

That was nice and all but I still didn't want to stand around this pit any longer, so I forcefully grabbed Cas by the arm and dragged him towards the door.

"Don't let go!" I shouted now. "Remember, don't let go of me!"

Just in case he had any notion at all of taking off and ditching me I pulled him with me and practically fell into the doorway with my grip clamped down on his arm like a vice.


	84. Chapter 84

_**Ok, so like I said before I don't want to get caught up with season 9 yet since it's just started, so I'm gonna start making chapters that aren't really tied in with season 8 plot to try and buy me some time. So that's what this chapter and the next are going to be like.**_

* * *

Going through the portal this time around was different than the last. I didn't have to run so much as we both ended up falling at what felt like a million miles an hour. By the time the other side opened and spat us out, we crashed with a thud to the motel room floor. For a moment I could only lie there, cringing from yet again feeling like my skin was melting off. I only snapped out of it when Cas let out a groan.

"It worked." He said. "I'm amazed actually."

I forced myself to sit up, noticing the motel room empty. Sam and Dean had obviously left recently, there was still fast foot containers sitting on the table, and beside that an envelope with my name written in bold print.

After jumping back to my feet and composing myself, I grabbed it and tore it open. It was from Dean, apparently they needed to make a move on the tablet and couldn't wait around for me to get back. He emphasized over and over again to not leave the motel room and they'd be back as soon as they could, and placed strategically on the table beside where the envelope had been was my cell phone- Which was his way of saying to call asap.

"Is everything alright?" Cas asked.

"Yeah-" I smiled and crumpled the letter up. "They'll be back as soon as they can."

He stared down at himself and nodded. "I'm incredibly filthy, I should clean up."

I pointed to the bathroom. "Go ahead, I gotta make a call."

After he had closed the bathroom door behind him and I heard the shower crank on I grabbed my phone and dialed Deans number. It rang a good five times before he finally picked up.

"Lara?"

"We're back." I stated.

Even though I could tell he tried to hide it I heard a relieved sigh. "You both good?"

"Yeah, we're fine. What's up? Where are you guys?"

"Had a little mishap-" He grumbled. "Long story short, tablet wasn't where Kevin left it, we found out where it was, shit went down and now Kevin and his Mom took off."

"Took off? So... You lost our prophet and the tablet?"

He continued to grumble. "Crowley showed up, ok? Couldn't really control the situation. We're on our way back, be there in a couple hours."

After he hung up on me I let out a sigh and sat down. So even though I hadn't been there to witness whatever happened, I could tell by the tone of Deans voice that he was pretty much blaming himself for it. Which, of course, wasn't at all uncommon. When did Dean _not _blame himself? Really, if one day he actually didn't I think I'd die of shock.

When Cas finally came out of the bathroom for a moment I was taken aback. It's funny how a few minutes alone in the bathroom he could revert to exactly the way he always had been. His trademark suit and tie, and his trench coat completely spotless. The beard was gone, and his hair wasn't disheveled. For a second I couldn't help but wonder if the suit had magically appeared out of thin air. Considering who was wearing it, yeah that didn't seem so far fetched.

"Better?" He asked, giving a small smile and holding out his arms.

I nodded, smirking. "You could say that."

He sat across from me at the table, for a moment allowing his eyes to trace every inch of the room.

"It's nice to feel like my old self again-" He sighed. "I had nearly forgotten what that's like."

"Yeah same here..." I fidgeted slightly. "So, what are you going to do now that you're back?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well... You're out, do you think you'll be making frequent trips back to heaven, or..."

"No." He quickly answered. "I think I would rather stay here with all of you."

His tone had gone even more monotone, which told me that I had struck a nerve. And the last thing I wanted to do was tick him off or upset him, so I quickly dropped the subject.

Less than thirty minutes we had been back and somehow, even though Cas was with us again, we were both safe- Something didn't quite feel right, and I wasn't sure what was making me feel that way.

* * *

Monsters I could handle, demons, sure why not. Dick angels? Yep. They weren't exactly anything new to me. But this was entirely different, and as I ran through the pitch black building, my heart was thumping so quickly in my chest I thought it might actually stop. Sam and Dean, I had no idea what happened to them, Cas... Same situation. I was left alone in this horrible place and my pursuer was gaining ground.

I quickly turned a corner and ducked behind a rusted out piece of machinery, an old conveyer belt or something- I didn't pay much attention to the details. This entire place was filled with sharp jagged pieces of rusted metal, old packing material and busted glass. Not exactly something easy to escape. My pistol in my hand had one round left, I had expended all but that one round, missing my target which was a rarity- But this wasn't a normal situation.

Now I needed to figure out what the hell I was going to do next. The boys were somewhere in this factory, but I couldn't stall around and wait for them. But as I tried my damnedest to find a way out, I heard the one thing that could make my blood run completely cold.

He was whistling again, much like he always did when he knew he had his victim trapped like a rat. A particular song, one that would drill its way into my fucking skull and never leave. Moonlight Sonata was the song, and it was echoing through the dark building to the point I couldn't pinpoint his location.

My hands started shaking, my teeth chattering. Rain dripped down through the holes in the ceiling, fog began to roll in, providing an even more horrible atmosphere. Just the way he liked it.

"Lara." He called out, and I could hear the amusement in his voice. "You know you can't hide from me... Come out... Let's talk."

I could barely hold the gun in my hand I was shaking so much, and I didn't dare move from my hiding spot. He would find me, he always did... Praying to Cas for help would only let this guy know where I was. I couldn't utter a single word. The only thing I could do was sit there frozen, becoming the one thing I always swore I would never become- A scared and helpless victim.

* * *

_Three days earlier..._

* * *

A week had gone by that Cas and I had returned from purgatory, and in that week it had slowly but surely started to feel like old times. But, there was one tiny problem and that was Dean. Yeah he was happy to have his best friend back but I could still see the guilt in his eyes whenever he would look at him. He still blamed himself for not getting Cas out of that place, and no matter what I said to him it didn't help.

I was of course going to mention something to Cas so he could solve the matter himself- But knowing my how my brother is it wouldn't have been a good idea. No chick flick moments, right? Which meant that they would have to work this out on their own.

Kevin and his Mom were still in the wind. We had no idea where they ran off to and Kevin was pro at dodging us and leaving false trails for us to follow. So after that first week and still no prophet or tablet, Sam announced he had found us a case. And since we didn't have much else to do at the moment- Dean was eager to take it.

We were eating breakfast at another diner when Sam first brought up the subject.

"Guys-" He said. "I think I might have found something. In Roswell Georgia five bodies have been found, all with their hearts missing.

Dean stopped chewing long enough to ask. "Ripped out or cut out?"

"Not sure. It doesn't say in the article, but- All of the victims were young women, all under the age of thirty all fitting the same description.

"Werewolves don't usually have a preference really-" Dean went on. "They'll chomp down on any heart they rip out. Don't matter if it's male or female."

"Yeah but some like to shred the ones their pissed at once they hulk out," I said. "So maybe these chicks scorned him or her somehow."

"Worth checking out at least." Sam sighed.

"Maybe I can be of some assistance," Cas added. "Since I would like to learn the trade of becoming a hunter."

Dean and Sam both gaped at him momentarily speechless. Myself however stifled back a chuckle.

"Dude, you've been helping us out for years-" Dean huffed. "You mean to say you haven't picked up a little somethin by now?"

"Well, in my defense, I was mainly there to ensure that all of you didn't get yourselves killed. So I didn't pay much attention to details, Dean. But since I want to learn, this time will be different."

Cas gave a small smile which forced Dean to nearly choke on his food. The thought of Cas becoming a hunter just seemed amusing, because we were pretty damn sure he would be the first "angel of the lord" to actually do it.

"Yeah ok, Rambo. Whatever floats your boat." Dean finished.

"So what else does it say about this case, Sam?" Cas asked, he sounded so serious I nearly peed myself.

"Uh-" Sam snickered slightly. "The women were all found around the same location, in the middle of the towns park, _but_-" He emphasized that but which caught my attention. "What's strange about it is that he didn't just tare their hearts out and leave the bodies behind. He positioned them in... Well a pretty weird way."

Instantly I went stiff, trying not to choke on my coke. No, no no, it couldn't be...

"What way?" Dean asked.

Sam arched both brows before answering. "They were sitting on the kids swings. Their wrists were tied to the chains to keep them from falling off."

Oh my god... No, not him.

"Doesn't sound very wolfy to me-" Dean shrugged. "Might not be our kinda thing."

"Well-" Sam held his ipad in front of Deans face. "What was left of their hearts were found on the ground in front of the victims... Half eaten."

"Ok maybe it is our kinda thing. But seriously, what kinda werewolf actually takes the time to put his shredded victims on a friggin swing set? Call me crazy but I thought when they transformed they're basically blood thirsty animals and don't have the thought process to do that?" Dean pushed the ipad aside so he could finish his breakfast.

This was a mistake. We couldn't take this case, we couldn't.

"Well maybe this one does?" Sam replied. "Maybe he's not fully transformed, or maybe he snaps out of it and feels remorse so he leaves his vics in a more, uh... Respectable position?"

"By leavin em on a kids swing set? Yeah, I'd like to see the therapy bills for the poor kids that find those bodies like that." Dean finally noticed my expression from across the table. "Lara? You ok, kid?"

They had absolutely no idea what they'd be getting themselves into with this one. But I just couldn't speak. I couldn't tell them what I knew. This was my worst nightmare coming back to haunt me all over again.

"Lara?" Cas nudged me lightly. "What's wrong? You look pale."

Maybe there was a chance it wasn't him? I mean, it was always a possibility. If it was him his m.o had changed slightly. And he was always a stickler for staying with his usual routine.

Cas was clearly concerned now as he reached over and lightly tapped my hand.

"Are you sick?" He asked now.

"Y-yeah-" I stuttered. "Breakfast isn't setting well I guess."

"You gonna feel like makin the drive to Georgia?" Dean lightly kicked my foot from under the table.

"Uh, yeah I'm ok. I'll be fine."

"Right-" He gave his usual pursed lips. "Well no puking in my my car, sister."

Say something you idiot, I told myself. Tell them what the hell they were going to be getting themselves in to with this job! But I couldn't. I couldn't force the words out because then they would know. They would know about what happened, and I couldn't allow that. I had spent all of this time building up a certain character in front of the boys and if they learned of this it would all be over. Besides, maybe I was wrong. Maybe we would get there and find it really was just a werewolf case.

No one believed my nausea story. Not even Cas who fell for almost anything. But I guess he had learned by now just what my facial expressions meant. Who the hell knows why neither of them decided to question me about it.

When we left the diner and started on the drive I had gone silent. So silent in fact that I didn't even hear the banter between the boys. The only thing I could do was try to figure out a way to get Sam and Deans attention off of this case without actually having to tell them why.

Unfortunately we weren't far from Georgia which meant we arrived in Roswell within a few hours. Before Dean could offer I stepped up and nominated myself to check out the bodies with Sam. Cas and Dean were heading to the police station. I needed to get in there, to see if I was right. I would know instantly just by a quick glance at the victims.

So I followed Sam inside- Barely aware of what I was doing as I flashed my badge and then followed my tree of a brother back into the morgue. There were only three bodies left, the previous two had already been cremated or buried- So I stood there completely stiff and blank faced as the coroner pulled the bodies out and removed the sheets.

For a moment I couldn't force myself to look at the poor girls but Sam went right to doing his job.

"Huh-" He said. "Doesn't look so much as their hearts were torn out, but surgically removed."

My breath left me, yeah I figured that much. I finally moved closer and grabbed a pair of surgical gloves- Afterwards taking one of the victims hands and exposing the underside of her wrist.

No. Dammit no. It was there. The mark. The sign I was looking for. The letter E had been carved into the girls skin. As soon as I saw it I dropped her arm like it was on fire and backed away until I was pressed into the wall behind me. Thankfully the coroner wasn't there to see me make a spectacle of myself, but Sam of course noticed.

"Hey-" He moved closer and leaned down so he was even with my eyes. "What's wrong?"

"We can't take this case, Sam. We have to leave town... Now." I replied.

"What, why? We just got here and we..."

"Because it's not a werewolf that's doing this. It's a skin-walker, and not just any skin-walker. If we stay..." I couldn't finish that sentence.

Ok I was freaking him out now.

"Lara how do you know what's doing this?"

Instead of answering I turned and left the morgue and I couldn't make it to the front steps of the building fast enough. By the time I was back outside in the fresh air I was in the thralls of a full blown panic attack.

Sam chased after me of course and when he caught up he was already on the phone with Dean.

"Just come and get us-" He barked into the phone. "Now!" He hung up on Dean and grabbed my arm. "Lara, talk to me. Tell me what the hell is going on."

I shook my head. "I'm not repeating this story more than once. So you'll just have to wait until Dean gets here."

* * *

All three men crowded around me as I sat awkwardly at the motel room table. In front of me sat an open beer which I had no interest in.

"Spill it, kid-" Dean prodded. "Just what's got you so freaked?"

I tried to force down the knot in my throat but my mouth was bone dry. I had no choice but to choke down a mouthful of beer.

"It was a while ago-" I started. "I was nineteen. I caught wind of what I thought was a werewolf case. It was in Sarasota, six women had been found with their hearts torn out and half eaten. I decided to check it out. Stupid, yeah I know to go alone but I did it anyhow. Everything was pretty run of the mill. I had no reason to think it wasn't a wolf."

"But it wasn't?" Sam said. "How'd you find out?"

"The hard way..." I forced my eyes off the table. "He caught wind that I was there investigating and nabbed me."

"Nabbed you?" Cas' brows scrunched. "You mean he abducted you?"

"Yeah. He took me back to this place where he kept all the other girls. It was like a dungeon out in the woods. He was going to kill me and don't ask how but somehow I managed to escape."

Dean began to pace. "And?"

"And call me crazy but I don't exactly want to tangle with this asshole again."

"No-" Dean sat down across from me. "I meant what else did this bastard do? There's more to the story that you're not tellin us. It ain't like you to freak out over a little skin-walker. Any chick that can run straight into purgatory without even flinching wouldn't piss their pants over one monster, so... What did he do?"

The way they were all looking at me, I could tell they were expecting the worst. I arched a brow and let out a sigh.

"He killed my sister." I answered, and their faces went blank. "My foster sister. I didn't get abducted, I let him take me so I could find her. She was older than me by a couple years and went to Florida for spring vacation. Her name was Emily. Since John didn't allow me to do anything, I was expected to just stay at my Foster parents house, so Emily went with a group of friends and I stayed behind. She kept in contact with me the entire time she was there, then when she suddenly stopped calling I freaked. That's when I noticed what I thought was a werewolf case and booked it down to Sarasota."

Dean sat back and crossed his arms. "And you let this guy take you? Why the hell did you do that? You were by yourself, do you know how stupid that is?"

"Yeah, now I do sure. But I was a stupid teenager and thought I was invincible, plus- It was Emily and I couldn't exactly sit back and do nothing while some werewolf tore her heart out. I was pretty sure she was already dead when I got there so it turned into more of a vengeance thing. It was after I started investigating that I realized it wasn't a wolf and it was someone that knew exactly what they were doing."

"How'd you escape?" Sam asked.

"I guess he was expecting a girl like the others he grabbed, unable to fight back. But I did, and by some miracle overpowered him enough to get away."

Dean only stared at me, his eyes trying their best to seer into my own.

"I get the feelin that there's still more you're not telling us, Lara." He said. "Just spit it out. All of it."

I fell silent as my attention fell towards the floor.

"You don't get it... He had a way of getting into your head, some sort of way to torture you psychologically. It took me years to finally work my way past what happened and you expect me to just drudge it all back up again?" I sighed deeply. "The reason why he's here doing this is because he's trying to get at me."

"How do you know that?" Cas asked.

"He left signs on the body. He told me he would when he was trying to get my attention. I was the one that got away, the _only _one that got away, and he can't tolerate that. Really, I knew it was only a matter of time before this happened."

Sam and Dean exchanged glances while Cas only looked completely dumbfounded.

"Ok, well. What I wanna know is if you're gonna be able to snap outa this to help take this mother down?" Dean said. "Because we sure as hell aren't gonna let him get away with killin anyone else. And, besides. He fucked with my sister, so... Bastards gonna fry."

Yeah I know it wasn't like me to get so freaked out over something like this. Normally I was the first one to run in guns blazing, and it took a lot to actually frighten me. I don't know what it was about this one though... I had seen pure evil more than once, but he seemed to make all of those past enemies feel like harmless kittens.

"I'm in. You know that." I finally answered. Crazy psycho or not, he needed to be taken out. "So where do we start?"


	85. Chapter 85

"You know this asshole, Lara-" Dean said. "So you'd know his tells, what he'd do. If he's hauled up somewhere where do you think it'd be?"

I tapped my fingers on the tabletop and nodded. "Somewhere secluded, someplace dark. Preferably with lockable rooms where he could keep his victims. But... I don't think we'll have to search for it. He's going to know I'm here, so... He'll contact me somehow."

Sam had begun to pace not long after I shared my story with them, while Cas stood stiffly by the table. His expression wasn't hard to read- He looked ready to tare off some heads.

"You said he's a skin walker?" Sam said now. "Does he have a certain way he likes to look?"

"There's no way of knowing how he's gonna look-" I answered. "He could be anyone. He could be you, Dean, Cas or anybody in town. That's why it'll be so hard to find him."

"I could probably pinpoint his location-" Cas said now. "And I could easily dispose of him."

"No-" I shook my head fervently. "You couldn't. He's good, really good, and you said so yourself, Cas- That since you got back from purgatory your powers are still topsy turvy. Don't underestimate this one, guys. I did and that's what nearly got me killed."

Dean yet again sat down in front of me.

"Ok, so this dick- You said that you're the only one that got away. Why is it that he's only just now deciding to come after you?" He asked.

"Honestly I thought maybe another hunter had taken him out for me. I don't know why he's decided to do this now. After the first couple years I thought I was in the clear, but I think that was just another mind fuck he played on me."

"Yeah... Make you believe you're safe then pop back up again." Sam added. "Sounds like one sick bastard."

"Ain't the first monster serial killer we've ganked before." Dean replied. "That shifter way back when that wore my face had pretty similar preferences to this guy."

Cas finally uncrossed his arms. "So do we just sit here and wait?"

"It's too risky to go out and look for him." I answered. "Like I said, he could be anyone. If we want to get this guy then we need to play smart and wait for him to contact me."

No one liked that idea and really neither did I. I didn't wanna just sit around while that monster roamed around free. I wanted him dead, and I wanted to pull the trigger myself.

Hours dragged by that felt like weeks. My stomach was successfully twisted into the tightest knot possible- Enough so that I couldn't even eat or drink. Sam and Dean were just as anxious and I knew that Dean would much rather be out there searching for the s.o.b- But we couldn't take the risk of something happening to us. If we got separated for even a second this guy could swoop in, change images, and fool us.

Cas had actually resorted to pacing around the motel room now, which was odd to say the least. He usually maintained a level of calm that kept him from freaking out. So when my cell suddenly began to buzz everyone went stiff.

"Answer it." Dean commanded. "On speaker."

I nodded and stared at the phone that was vibrating across the table before finally hitting accept.

"Hello?" I said, trying to keep my voice from cracking.

The reply on the other end was whistling. Moonlight sonata, which made me go stiff and my brothers and Cas to stare at each other in confusion.

The whistling lasted for a good thirty seconds before a husky chuckle followed suit.

"Hello, Lara." He said, and I felt the blood drain from my face. "It's been a long time. Too long."

I noticed Cas' fists clench at his sides, and Dean reached over and grabbed his shoulder. Getting pissed at a phone wasn't going to do us any justice right now- So he motioned for him to stay quiet and for me to speak.

"Not long enough." I replied. "So, I don't suppose you'll tell me where you are?"

Another husky chuckle. "Actually, I thought about doing just that, but you're not alone in that motel room are you? You're with three other men. Hunters, right?"

"Maybe. I thought you weren't afraid of hunters?"

"I like a fair fight. And four against one isn't exactly fair is it?"

"I think it's pretty damn fair. Admit it. You're scared. You know that you're up against more than just me this time."

Dean arched a brow after that comment while Sam shifted back and forth on his feet.

"They're welcome to try, Lara- But you and I both know that it's not that easy to get rid of me." His voice had gone lower.

"Tell me where you're held up this time. Let's just get this over with." I was growing more angry than afraid by now.

He sighed, and I could hear metal clanking in the background.

"244 Delmont Street. But if you want some friendly advice, leave your hunter friends behind. It's not them that I'm after."

The phone beeped as the call ended and I quickly shoved it away.

"Cas-" Dean said. "Check it out. See if he's there but don't let him see you."

Cas promptly zapped away.

"He's not there right now. He knows better than that. He's gonna wait til after dark so he can catch us off guard." I said.

"Maybe-" Dean sneered. "But little does this bastard know, but we got an angel on our shoulder. So, you don't gotta worry about him anymore, kid. After tonight he'll be nothin more than a bloody streak on the ground."

Cas returned moments later and shook his head. "He isn't there, but there are signs of the building being frequented lately."

"Lemme guess-" I sighed. "Abandoned building, could be a factory, an old jail or hospital?"

He nodded. "A factory yes."

"And it's not within shouting distance of any other buildings? It's secluded?"

Yet again he nodded. "That's correct."

I stood from the table and grabbed my jacket. "He'll have the place booby trapped, so when we go in we'll have to be careful. He's gonna try his best to separate us."

"Cas-" Dean nudged him. "I think it'll be a good idea if you go invisible girl while we're there. He won't expect that. Just in case we do get separated you could stick with Lara easier than we could."

"Everyone stock up on silver bullets." Sam added. "Only way to take him out."

"Unless I get him first." Cas finished.

"Yeah, guess you're a little more potent than silver, huh?" Dean chuckled. "We leave after dark."

Dean was trying to keep a cool head about him, but I could tell he was ready to blow. The one thing you never ever do is fuck with Dean Winchesters family. That's a sure fire way to get your lungs ripped out.

* * *

I had been loading silver bullets into my pistol for a good ten minutes. Seeing is that it wasn't a lengthy or difficult task apparently my mind was elsewhere. Cas and Sam were going over old blueprints of the factory this monster was held up in, trying to see where it might be obvious there could be traps set up. Dean? He was sitting in front of me at the table with his eyes searing out the window.

"Gotta say-" He interrupted my thoughts. "Seeing you like this is a mind trip."

"What are you talking about?" I lied my pistol down.

"Ever since you showed up you've tried to give off the illusion of bein a hard ass, that nothin scares you. You would jump in front of a bus if it meant savin someone. Now..."

"I'm a sniveling mess?" I retorted.

"No-" He snickered. "You're actin normal. And for once maybe I can do my job as your older brother, huh?"

"My supposed hard ass attitude is a facade, Dean. Can't exactly let fear eat away at you when you live a life like ours. After so many years you learn to push it away and not think of it, but it's still there. And then something like this happens..."

"And it round house kicks you in the face all at once." He nodded. "Yeah, I get it. It's happened to the best of us."

"Really?" I snorted. "I fail to recall when you've let yourself pee your pants from being scared."

He shrugged. "Like you said after a while it's pushed back so far you don't even realize it's there anymore. But sometimes it rears it's ugly head, mainly when one of you is in danger."

Yeah like I thought- No one fucks with Deans family.


	86. Chapter 86

After dark it was time to start off for this factory. No I wasn't looking forward to it, in fact I was almost one hundred percent certain something would go horribly wrong. Like I had told the boys- He was after me, which meant that he would stop at nothing to get me. Sam, Dean and Cas were nothing to him and he certainly wasn't threatened. There was no telling just how many hunters he had taken out over the years. No kidding he thought he could do that this time as well.

The drive through town was gut wrenching. I had never been this nervous in my entire life, or this shaken up. Which if you thought about it, was a little strange. After all, a week ago I was in friggin purgatory being chased by every monster imaginable. Not exactly a fun filled pleasure cruise. It's funny to think that I would rather go back to that god forsaken place than face this asshole again.

But I tried to think of what Dean would do. How would he react? And sure maybe he'd be freaked out and ready to shit his pants but that wouldn't stop him from ganking this mother- because if we didn't, he would continue to kill. There was no telling how many poor women he had slaughtered.

Dean parked a half a block from the old factory and we each piled out of the impala and started going through our gear. I had my pistol loaded with silver bullets of course, along with a silver knife. As did Sam and Dean. Cas didn't need them, naturally- So we were as ready as we'd ever be.

Cas had gone "invisible girl" as Dean liked to call it, before we even stepped out of the car. And just as it had happened when we went to retrieve the alpha vamps blood, I could still see him. Yeah alarming sure since I wasn't certain exactly how I could see him, but it was comforting at the same time knowing he would be following me.

We didn't speak much as we started down a brush filled alley that led to the back of the building. Sam had stated that the front entrance led to a wide open room filled with machinery, according to the blueprints, and the back was mainly used as storage or offices back in the day. To go in the back would have been obvious to this monster, but going in the front might have been worse. Not that it mattered, I knew this place was going to be rigged from top to bottom- So it didn't really matter which door we went through.

When we reached the massive building which I could see now had previously been a weapons making factory from what seemed to be decades ago- Sam motioned towards the windows instead of the door.

Speaking wasn't possible, so I read their hand motions and expressions. Dean didn't want to risk climbing through a window only to find it rigged with an explosive, so with a flick of his finger Cas zapped inside. We had established in the car on the drive here that hand signals were our only form of communicating and apparently Cas had been paying attention- Since Dean had clearly told him to check it out.

I could tell by Deans shifty eyes that he was wondering if Cas had listened to him. Since the boys couldn't see our angel right now, they could only guess. Cas zapped back out seconds later and a scatter of gravel was his way of telling Dean the way was clear. Oh if only we could communicate telepathically this would have been a hell of a lot easier.

Dean pulled himself up into the window first, then Sam and finally myself. Cas followed by his zapping inside.

The room was a former office, the only thing left inside was a rusted out metal desk which was flipped over on its side. It was in that moment when I caught myself gawking at Cas did he notice I obviously could see him. For a moment his brows scrunched but since we were trying to skulk quietly he couldn't say anything about it. But he seemed a little more at ease now that he knew I could see him, so he inched his way closer and stayed at my side.

So far all was quiet in the building, but I knew that wouldn't last long. It was more than unnerving in the darkness and the ominous rumble of thunder in the distance certainly wasn't helping.

I could barely hold my pistol at the ready because my hands were shaking. Cas noticed and reached up, taking hold of my wrist. His eyes told me that everything was going to be fine- That he wouldn't let anything happen to us. I tried my best to keep that thought in mind. I wasn't worried about myself right now, exactly. I was worried about my boys. This monster definitely had the capability of filleting my brothers piece by piece.

Dean and Sam led the way and I was practically stuck to the back of them. As so advised by Dean. The closer we were the less of a chance there would be of getting separated obviously.

It was a nice thought at least, but no dice. We had left the office in the dark by now and were making our way down the hallway when suddenly a metal door fell from the ceiling completely blocking me from my brothers. I didn't have the chance to make a sound before the floor opened up and I went falling into darkness.

After crashing to the basement floor with a thud, I groaned slightly from an ache in my left knee. Thank god I didn't break my legs, I thought. I would be a sitting duck. Not that I wasn't that already.

"Lara?!" I could faintly hear Dean screaming from the ceiling above.

But I couldn't call out back to him. I knew better than that. He was here, somewhere close- And I needed to keep on the move. He was getting what he wanted now, me alone in an unfamiliar place, stuck like a rat in a maze. He loved the chase- This part was the most fun.

For a moment I couldn't help but think of the last time this had happened. He set me loose in the forest so he could hunt me down. That's what he did, you see- He didn't just abduct his victims and kill them. He liked to do his own version of hunting. He had every tree, every rock, bush or path in that forest memorized so it was easy for him to track his prey. And had I not stumbled across a couple of campers at their campsite I never would have made it out alive.

It wasn't a grand escape like I had made it out to be. It was sheer luck alone that I didn't get my heart torn out.

I glanced around me, expecting to see Cas- But he wasn't there. And in the darkness I could just barely make out an angel warding sigil painted on the ceiling.

Dammit. He knew somehow that Cas was an angel- Which meant I couldn't rely on him to watch my back.

The room I stood in was empty and I had three doors to choose from. This was there the lucky guessing had to come into play- Because only one door wouldn't be rigged somehow. For a moment I lowered my gun as I stepped forward.

The door in front of me looked ready to rust off its hinges, the one to my left was partially open. And the last one on the right was dripping with moisture from the holes in the ceiling. That was the door I chose. I hoped the moisture could mean he wouldn't have set up a fireball or some other form of explosive- But as I reached for the handle suddenly I stopped.

That wasn't water dripping down the door, it was kerosine. The smell practically smacked me in the face.

Fuck...

I ran my shaky hand across my face and tried to calm down. No, he was smarter than this. He would have known I would smell the kerosine? Wouldn't he? Or maybe he'd figure I would be too freaked out to notice- Since this entire place reeked of mold, dead animals and dirt.

I moved to the partially open door and pulled my flashlight from my jacket. With a peak out of the slight opening I could see a trip wire spread across the door frame, which was attached to the door itself. If I opened that I could very well go boom.

Ok, I knew now that he had rigged every door but only one of them was actually safe enough for me to pass through. He wanted me to solve the puzzle.

"Cas..." I whispered. "If you can her me, I'm in the basement. He's got warding sigils painted on the ceiling."

I hoped to god he heard me.

"If you find your way down here, be careful." I went on. "He's got explosives rigged."

Now I went to the third and final door, which was rusted and falling apart. There was no telling what was on the other side. A bomb? A razor sharp blade ready to swing down and slice my head off? I just didn't know. But I reached for it anyways because I knew for certain the others would blow up in my face. I backed against the wall and reached over carefully, pulling the door open with a flash.

Nothing happened. No explosion, no falling guillotine, nothing. When I heard footsteps approaching one of the rigged doors I didn't wait and darted out of the room and started running.

I couldn't see jack squat in this place, and over and over again I tripped on random pieces of broken boards or twisted metal. When I reached a large open room that was full of conveyer belts and other things, the light that poured down through the holes in the ceiling provided just enough illumination to guide me through the maze. Eventually it began to rain, and as it pooled on the floor above, it began to drizzle around me and make the floor slick.

A crash of something behind me forced me to spin around, and after seeing a dark figure dart through the machines I started firing. Missing, of course. As soon as I saw him he was gone, and all had went silent once more.

Monsters I could handle, demons, sure why not. Dick angels? Yep. They weren't exactly anything new to me. But this was entirely different, and as I ran through the pitch black building, my heart was thumping so quickly in my chest I thought it might actually stop. Sam and Dean, I had no idea what happened to them, Cas... Same situation. I was left alone in this horrible place and my pursuer was gaining ground.

I quickly turned a corner and ducked behind a rusted out piece of machinery, an old conveyer belt or something- I didn't pay much attention to the details. This entire place was filled with sharp jagged pieces of rusted metal, old packing material and busted glass. Not exactly something easy to escape. My pistol in my hand had one round left, I had expended all but that one round, missing my target which was a rarity- But this wasn't a normal situation.

Now I needed to figure out what the hell I was going to do next. The boys were somewhere in this factory, but I couldn't stall around and wait for them. But as I tried my damndest to find a way out, I heard the one thing that could make my blood run completely cold.

He was whistling again, much like he always did when he knew he had his victim trapped like a rat. A particular song, one that would drill its way into my fucking skull and never leave. Moonlight Sonata was the song, and it was echoing through the dark building to the point I couldn't pinpoint his location.

My hands started shaking, my teeth chattering. Rain dripped down through the holes in the ceiling, fog began to roll in, providing an even more horrible atmosphere. Just the way he liked it.

"Lara." He called out, and I could hear the amusement in his voice. "You know you can't hide from me... Come out... Let's talk."

I could barely hold the gun in my hand I was shaking so much, and I didn't dare move from my hiding spot. He would find me, he always did... Praying to Cas for help now would only let this guy know where I was. I couldn't utter a single word. The only thing I could do was sit there frozen, becoming the one thing I always swore I would never become- A scared and helpless victim.

He was winning again, and that thought was pissing me off beyond belief. I needed to figure out my own way out of this, I couldn't rely on anyone else to do it.

My mind flitted off to what Lee had said he'd given me. A reservoir, so he called it, of his own abilities. Something that I would be able to use during times of distress. So he claimed he gave me the knowledge in how to use these so called abilities, but whether that was true or not I couldn't tell. It wasn't like flicking a switch or something, I couldn't just say I wanted to use them and there they would be.

When a hand reached around and pressed over my mouth, I immediately started to panic.

"Lara..." Cas whispered. "It's me."

I let out a relieved sigh. "How'd you find me?"

"The sigils weren't completely accurate, he missed a mark or two-" He was crouched down beside me as his eyes flicked around the area. "We should go."

He grabbed my hand and pulled me past the machines and towards the opposite end of the building.

"Where's Sam and Dean?" I whispered now.

"We were separated, at the moment I'm unsure of their location."

Something didn't feel quite right, and it wasn't just the fact I was trapped in a building with a raving lunatic.

I glanced down at Cas' strides as he pulled me along, feeling my brow arch. He wouldn't have dragged me out of the building, he would have simply zapped me out.

Skidding to a stop I pulled my hand from his grasp and rose my gun at his chest.

"You're not Cas." I said, not bothering to whisper anymore.

I squeezed the trigger but he lunged at me and grabbed my wrist, my last round was shot up into the ceiling. Afterwards he pried the gun from my hand and tossed it away. My knife was in my jacket, and seeing is that he had me in a death grip I couldn't reach for it.

"You should have seen your face." He chuckled in my ear. "I was wondering which of them I should mimic. I guess I chose the right guy, huh?" I cringed, hearing him speak with Cas' voice made my blood run cold. "I've been keeping track of you, you know? Over the years." He started to drag me backwards down a dark hallway. "I was surprised to learn you had brothers that were hunters, and that other one. Cas, as you called him. An angel? You've been moving up haven't you?"

"Where are they?" I croaked out as well as I could since his arm was wrapped around my throat.

"Don't worry about them. I'm not."

"Then just let them go. You didn't want them anyways."

He pushed backwards through a closed door and we entered yet another area of the factory.

"Yeah, about that," He chuckled. "I can't exactly let them go, because they're just going to come after me once you're dead."

"Good luck actually trying to kill them. They're a million times better than me. And Cas is an angel, so unless you have some angel smiting weapon at your disposal, you're screwed." That didn't seem to faze him as he continued to drag me. "And I suppose you didn't hear about me, either?"

His pace slowed some. "And what might that be?"

"I'm not human..." With that I grabbed hold of his arms and instinctively they started to burn through his coat sleeves.

He quickly released me and started screeching, and as he jumped about swatting at his sleeves to keep them from bursting into flames another figure lunged out of the darkness and shoved him across the room. Judging by how far he flew, and how hard he crashed into the wall I knew it had to have been Cas. When he crumpled down to the floor I could see a large gaping hole left in the solid concrete.

"Lara, hit the floor!" I heard Dean scream and I quickly fell to the ground laying flat on my stomach.

A slew of gunshots pierced through the darkness and silence, along with pain filled grunts and blood spray. By the time Sam and Dean had stopped firing, Cas' twin was lying on the ground motionless and covered in blood.

I pulled myself back to my feet as all three men rushed to my side.

"You good?" Dean asked, eying me from head to toe.

"I'm fine." I grabbed the pistol from his hands and approached the bastard. He was still gurgling, so I rose the gun and fired three extra shots into his heart until he stopped breathing. "No, _now _I'm fine."

Cas knelt down at the body, which was his exact replica. He looked pissed enough to start desecrating his corpse, but kept his clenched fists at his sides. Then he reached down and noticed the burns on his twins arms.

"Did you do this, Lara?" He asked, even though it was completely obvious.

"Apparently so."

"How?" He squinted up at me through the darkness.

"Good question-" I turned away and faced Sam and Dean, who looked like they had just been through a fight with a pack of wildcats. "What the hell happened to you two?"

"The dick had everything rigged with friggin razor wire." Dean answered, examining the slices in his arms. "You sure you're ok?"

I nodded, and Cas rejoined us and stood at mine and Deans side. "I'll be better once we're out of here."

"First thing's first." Sam said, moving closer to the corpse, only then did I notice him pull a small container of lighter fluid from his jacket which he then began to pour over the corpse. "For good measure." He added, giving me a wink.

I stood blankly and watched as he lit up a matchbook and tossed it on the body, instantly sending into a poof of flames.

"Ok, Cas-" Dean said. "Can you zap us back to the car?"

Cas nodded and with a whoosh we found ourselves standing beside the impala. It wouldn't be long before the building itself was on fire, so we left as quickly as possible.

The drive back to the motel I felt myself give a small smile. Finally that part of my life was over and done with, and I would never have to deal with it again. And, as I glanced to the front seat, and to my right where Cas sat- My brows arched slightly. Nah... They didn't need to hear the entire story about what happened... Sometimes, things are just better left unsaid.

* * *

_**I just wanted to say that for the moment updated chapters for this story are going to be slowing down, at least until season 9 is more than halfway through- Since I said before I didn't want to get caught up. In the mean time you can check out my other story posted if you want. Maybe it'll suffice, huh? lol.**_


	87. Chapter 87

We didn't catch much of a break from our last job because Dean seemed to have found us another case in Missouri. Some woman completely flattened her husband into a sloppy joe pancake by kicking the jack out from under his car- Then deciding to climb in said car and shred him.

After Dean explained the case, for once I had to agree with Sam when he said it didn't really sound like our kind of thing. Yeah a woman killing her husband is bad and all, but there really wasn't anything strange about it. But ever since Dean got back from purgatory he had been restless unless he was on a hunt. And since I didn't want to tick off my oldest brother I didn't argue when we started on the drive.

He and Sam were still "building" back their relationship, which was still touch and go at times. Dean was still hurt and pissed that Sam never helped me search for him during the year he was missing, and Sam was equally pissed for being pulled away from his new and normal life. Seriously, these two- I wanted to lock them in a friggin room and force some kind of relationship therapy on them.

Cas was adjusting it seemed to being back, at least in a sense that he felt like our friend again. There was still something about him though that was irking me. Mainly because he refused for even a second to talk about anything that had to do with angels, heaven or God. He was more quiet than usual, but tried to play off the sullen by acting as though he was invested in becoming a hunter.

When we pulled over at a gas station slash mini diner, Dean and Sam left the car to grab our food, and I stayed behind. This was probably the only opportunity I would get to talk to Cas alone- Seeing is that my brothers were always around.

"So-" I said, nudging him across the seat. "How're you doing?"

He tilted his head slightly. "I'm fine, Lara- Why do you ask?"

"Because you're not fine." I shrugged. "Something is clearly on your mind. You've been pretty damn quiet since we got back, so I wanna know what's goin through your head."

He returned his attention out the passenger window. "It's nothing you need to concern yourself with."

"Bull crap." I scooted across the seat and forced him to look at me. "Is it that you really didn't want to come back with me? Is that it?"

"Of course not."

"Ok then, spill it. Why are you so Debbie Downer?"

For some reason his eyes wouldn't meet mine.

"I've tuned out of angel radio. I've refused to even a second to return to heaven because I'm afraid of what I might find. I tried to tell myself that that part of my life was over, and instead I wanted to remain here with all of you- But I can't help but wonder if there's anything left to be fixed. I completely destroyed heaven, Lara- And if there is anything left, I don't know if I even _could_ fix it."

I nodded. "Have you thought about maybe jetting on up there for a second to see? Maybe it would help you make up your mind?"

He shook his head. "I can't. As much as I want to repair the mess I caused, Lara- I know that if I returned to heaven now... What I might find there could very well change me forever, and not in a positive way." Now he gave a faint smile. "But I still want to help people, I need to. If I can't fix the catastrophe in heaven then at least I could do some good down here."

I smiled back. "If that's what you want to do, Cas- Then do it."

Now he finally did allow his eyes to meet mine. "But I made a promise to you. I swore that I would never leave again."

"You're not leaving and jeez, dude- You're not my friggin prisoner. If you want to zip around and help people I'm all for that. It's not like you wouldn't come back, right?"

He nodded. "Of course. I would be here whenever you needed me to be. All you have to do is pray."

"Then that's settled. And you can stop looking so mopey."

He offered another faint smile and I scooted back to my seat when Sam and Dean returned with our food.

Dean ate as he drove and I dug into my burger with a vengeance. Yeah, sometimes I didn't think I could live without these awesome grease filled globs of deliciousness.

"Dean-" Cas said awkwardly from the backseat. "I was just speaking to Lara a moment ago, and I think I've come to a decision."

Dean glanced at him from over his shoulder. "What's up?"

"I think it would be a good idea if I..." Cas paused, and he actually looked nervous to spit the words out.

"He wants to take off and do some work of his own-" I finished for him. "Ya know, start helping people?"

Dean arched a brow, his face turning pensive. "Isn't that what you're doin by stickin with us and the hunts we take?"

"Of course, but I could accomplish much more if I were on my own."

"He kinda has a point-" Sam sighed. "Riding around in the impala with us kinda hinders his mobility, don't you think?" Dean pursed his lips at that. "He could accomplish more on his own."

"Maybe-" Dean pouted. "Don't mean he's gotta take off though."

"As I told Lara," Cas continued. "I would always return when you called. I don't plan on staying away forever."

I couldn't help but smirk at Dean and the way he was acting. No, he didn't want his buddy taking off again after him just getting back. Honestly, it's not like I was thrilled with him leaving either, but I knew Cas by now- He was still punishing himself for the mistakes he made, and if zapping around the world helping people would make him get over that, then of course I wouldn't complain.

"Ok, fine-" Dean huffed. "If you gotta do it, then go. I won't stop ya. But once we get a lead on Kevin, we'll need you back."

"Of course." Cas gave me a small smile before zapping out of the car.

The drive to Missouri was quick, and once we pulled into the drive of a country house, with a nice open view of the corn fields out back, my eyes immediately went to the two lone police vehicles parked there. Considering there was a murder you would expect to see more, but nope... There wasn't.

Dean pulled up beside one of the cars and cut the engine, letting out a grumble before reaching into the glove box and retrieving our fake IDs.

I took mine but then did a double take when I saw a tall lanky figure just near the front porch of the house, talking with a man. If it weren't for the cowboy hat and fringed leather jacket I would swear that was...

"Holy crap." I muttered. "Nah, can't be."

Pushing the car door open I approached the crime scene tape and flashed my badge to one of the officers before climbing under and moving closer. Dean and Sam followed, and after a few words with the cop Dean flinched.

"Looks like a Texas ranger beat us to the punch." Dean said, then glanced across the way to where this man stood. "Wait a second, is that..."

I beat him out as I moved across the drive and cleared my throat. I was right... It was him.

Garth...

He swung around, and for a second I was slightly surprised to see he was attempting to grow a beard.

"Lara?!" He said, grinning like an idiot. "Oh my god, girl, is that you?"

I nodded, and couldn't miss the confusion on both my brothers faces even if I tried.

"Hey, Garth. It's been a while." I replied.

He let out his signature laugh and grabbed me into a tight hug. "Wow, just wow. I can't believe it! The last time I saw you you were nothin but knees and elbows!"

"Whoa, hold on a second there, chuckles-" Dean said, wagging his finger at him. "You two know each other?"

"Dean? Sam?" Now he grabbed them and squeezed.

"Ah, damn- I forgot he was a hugger." Dean grumbled. Once he successfully freed himself from Garths grasp, he went on. "How do you two know each other?"

Garth motioned towards the man he had been speaking to. "Just a moment, Sir-" We then took a few steps away. "You mean, Lara didn't tell you?"

"Tell us what?" Sam asked, equally confused.

"Back when Lara was a kid and she was stayin with Bobby, if somethin ever turned up and he had to go off on a job, he'd drop her off with me." Garth grinned. "Kid's like my little sister. How you two know Lara?"

Dean scowled at him. "She's actually _our _sister."

Garth stood up straight, his smile fading. "What? I didn't know you had a sister?"

"Yeah that's a long story-" Sam changed the subject. "So, what happened here?"

"From what I can tell so far, seems like the wife just flipped out. According to what her son said-" He motioned to the man in the background. "They had a normal marriage, no real problems, and he has no idea why his Mom woulda done this."

"See, Dean- It doesn't sound like our kinda thing." Sam continued to protest.

Dean ignored him and started for the carport where the incident took place. I followed and cringed at all the blood splatter. Garth took a look around as well, walking through underneath the awning before we all heard a disgusting squish.

"Ah, man." Garth grumbled, raising his foot. A long slimy line was connected to the bottom of his cowboy boot and to the ground below.

"Oh gross." I said, leaning over slightly. "That looks like ectoplasm."

Dean immediately smacked Sam on the chest. "See, ectoplasm. So that means we're dealin with a pissed off spirit."

Yeah Sam was annoyed, he didn't want this to be anything clearly. He just wanted to find Kevin, close the gates of hell and go back to Texas. Ya know, I was understanding, I was, really, I was- I knew that Sam was different, he wanted a normal life or whatever, but seriously- Sometimes I wanted to smack the crap out of him.

Garths phone began to ring from his jacket, which he quickly answered. After a few quick words and jotting something down on his palm he snapped his phone shut and nodded.

"So I asked the coroner to keep a look out on the body for anything strange-" He held up his hand. "The victim had the word Alcott scratched into his chest with what he guessed was the wifes fingernails."

"Ouch." Dean flinched. "Ok, well where's the wife being held? Jail, or?"

"Hospital-" Garth finished. "I'll meet you guys there."

* * *

After a trip to the hospital to talk to the victims wife, we found out that Alcott wasn't a word, but a name. Apparently back in the day her former husband had taken this chick to the prom or some shit, instead of her. And apparently, the wife still held a grudge. According to what she said she didn't know where the anger had come from. They had been married for over thirty years, happily by the sounds of it. And something happened that seemed to bring all of these old haunts back to the here and now. And, in turn, she whammied her husband. After it happened she passed out, and woke up to the sound of sirens, having no idea what even happened other then she had a splitting headache, and her husband was mincemeat.

Sam and me went to go and talk to the other woman, and after sitting on her front porch drinking enough sweet tea to make you go into a diabetic coma- We found out that it wasn't just a little prom date. Apparently she and the dead guy had bumped uglies back then too.

But, both Sam and myself agreed, if the wife was going to kill her husband she would have done that years ago instead of waiting until now. Yeah, pissed off spirit, most definitely. Now we just needed to figure out who it was, and where we could burn the bones.

Which wasn't exactly easy, because not three hours that we'd been in town the womans son flipped out and shoveled some poor bastard at a mini mart. And by shoveled, I mean completely bashed the poor dudes face in, oh and that was after he threw a hot pot of coffee in it. Ok so now we had a wife that flipped her shit and went postal on someone, and now her son?

"Dammit-" Garth grunted, raising his boot showing he'd stepped in another blob of ectoplasm. "Just not my day, huh?"

I leaned over and examined it closely. "Is it just me, or is ectoplasm supposed to be black?"

Dean stared at it for a moment and nodded. "Never seen any that's dark green before."

"Guys, check this out-" Sam said, pointing to the glass cooler at the end of the isle.

Painted on the glass in the victims blood was the word or name "Sussex".

"Sussex-" Dean sounded out the word. "Another person, maybe?"

"Don't know-" Now Sam motioned over his shoulder. "They got the security footage up and rolling."

We left the gore behind and watched the scene unfold on the tv. We were all equally confused when we saw a fuzzy blurred line completely shooting across the screen, masking the dudes face.

"Well, I guess it's safe to say that it's definitely caused by some sort of spirit." I said. "Not that we didn't know that already."

"Yeah but how the hell are we supposed to find out who it is?" Dean grumbled. "Maybe there would be somethin in Bobbys journal, something that would tell us what leaves behind green goo."

"How bout we go get somethin to eat, and research while we're at it?" Garth suggested. "I'm starving."


	88. Chapter 88

Garth had about six plates surrounding him as he stuffed his face. Dean and I munched on our burgers, while Sam his usual salad. He was clicking around on his laptop at the same time, ignoring the chatter going on around us.

"So, where you guys been, huh?" Garth asked. "I haven't seen you since... Well, since we took care of that shojo."

"Long story-" Dean grumbled. "Not a good one either."

"Comon, you can tell me. And while you're at it, why don't ya tell me how I never knew you had a sister?"

"That's another long story that isn't good." I retorted.

Garth nudged me with his elbow. "Well when did you team up with them then? You weren't around when we met up."

"I was dead." I shoved french fry in my mouth and Garth only gaped at me.

"Dead?" His face had fell flat.

"Yeah, dead. Was stuck in heaven until a butt-hole angel called a seraphim resurrected me."

Garth looked to each of us expecting us to announce it was a joke, but when Dean only arched both brows at him, retaining his serious "I hate this convo" face, Garth swallowed his mouthful of food.

"I guess I missed a lot, huh?" Garth finally said. "Dang... I wish I woulda known, Lara. I kinda feel like you're my responsibility."

"Hey, hey-" Yet again Dean waved a finger at him. "For the tenth time, she ain't your sister. She's ours."

"Well, maybe by blood but that don't change things. Heck, I practically raised the kid for a year." Garth sat back.

Sam pulled his eyes from his laptop. "When was this?"

Garth shrugged. "Lara was only a teenager at the time. Really, I wasn't much older, and had just graduated from dental school. Bobby had helped me out once a while back, and after some incident as he called it, said that he had a kid that needed looking after. I had already became a hunter by then, so I guess Bobby trusted me."

"It was after John died." I filled in the blanks which made both brothers nod in understanding. "Bobby thought maybe something would have been coming after me so he shipped me off to Garths, I think it was... Around nine months that I was there."

Dean dropped his burger to his plate and shook his head. "I guess that was Dads doing. Nah, don't send her to her actual brothers, send her to a perfect stranger."

"And you never thought to tell us that?" Sam asked. "Just how many other hunters out there did Bobby or Dad stick you with?"

"I lost count, and it wasn't Bobby really. If John couldn't leave me with him then he would turn to other hunters." I shrugged. "It's not that big a deal."

"Maybe not to you-" Dean scowled bitterly. "But all that time you were out there with strangers when you shoulda been with your family."

"Well, that doesn't matter now." I smiled faintly at him, yeah it was nice that he got so defensive over something like that. "You find anything yet, Sammy?"

Sam nodded. "Sussex wasn't a person, it was a business. Apparently it went belly up, something to do with bad investments, and guess who was the partner to the guy who owned it?"

"Shoveled guy?" Dean answered, and Sam nodded.

"Ok, so he obviously had a beef with this dude to shovel him to death." I said. "But how does that tie into a vengeful spirit?"

Garth then held up a finger. "Think I might know-" He then pointed to Bobbys journal which he had been reading through. "What he said is that green goo is signs of a specter, and they usually show up after a grave has been desecrated."

Sam nodded and started clicking around again, obviously in search of any news of any grave desecrations lately. After about five minutes his brows rose.

"Ok, well... One grave had been broke in to in the last week... Uh, yeah... Don't think this is gonna be an easy one, guys."

"Why?" Dean asked.

"Take a look around you, Dean-" Sam said, motioning to all of the confederate flags and civil war crap hanging on the restaurant walls. "It's not just a grave, but the grave of the unknown soldier."

"Unknown soldier?" Dean went on. "And that's gonna be hard, why?"

Sam closed his laptop and waved the waitress over to get the check. "You'll see."

* * *

So as it turns out this recently ransacked grave was in a tomb being guarded by a solider. Which meant we had to wait until after dark to break in in and burn the remains. After that was done we thought it would be over, but nah- When are things ever that simple?

The next morning we heard that there was a shooting at the police station. Apparently the deputy flipped out and blew away his superior. Of course he said all he could remember was red hot rage, then waking up on the floor in cuffs.

The officer that had subdued him seemed to flip out shortly after and muttered something about going to the hospital, while carrying a loaded shot gun. Dean and I took off after that while Sam and Garth went to find more info on this unknown soldier. The night before it didn't seem anything had been stolen from his tomb after it had been broke into, but we could have been wrong. Seeing is that the spirit was still reeking havoc, apparently we were.

When we got to the hospital Dean told me to head to the back to make sure this guy didn't escape. Needless to say it was a bad idea. By the time I found my way to the front of the hospital there was glass shattered, bullet holes in the walls, and the police officer was lying on the ground unconscious. Dean? He was gone. Just gone. But splatters of more ectoplasm left a nasty little trail to the doors.

"Fuck..." I moved to a nurse who was frantically screaming on the phone for help. "What happened here?"

I flashed my badge so she would actually talk.

"He went crazy!" She screamed. "He tried to shoot someone. Another man, one in a suit tackled him. I don't know what happened, but after the officer was knocked out the other one suddenly got up and ran out of the building!"

I didn't stand around to hear anymore and rushed out the front entrance. The impala was gone, so I quickly grabbed my phone. Naturally I tried calling Dean first, but of course he didn't answer- So I dialed Sam next.

"Yeah, hey." He answered.

"Dude, something happened. Dean took off, I think the specter got him!"

"Dammit, ok- Where are you?"

"Still at the hospital. Hurry your ass here and get me."

It didn't take long for Garths ranchero to come speeding down the road, and as soon as I climbed in we took off.

"Something was taken from the tomb-" Sam explained as we drove. "A penny. I noticed an old string on the tomb floor but didn't really think much of it at the time."

"So the specter is attached to a penny?" I replied.

"Seems like it." Garth answered.

"Dean's back at the motel." Sam said after tracking the GPS on his phone. "Uh... Why would he go there if the specter is fucking with him?"

Garth laid on the gas and we made it back to the motel within minutes. Of course we didn't bother to think things through before barging inside.

Dean was sitting on the end of the bed, his face was a twisted snarl of an expression- And as soon as he set eyes on us he quickly stood and pointed his gun straight at Sammy.

"You should have looked for me when I was in purgatory!" He shouted. "Why didn't you look for me?!"

My mouth went agape, and I took a few steps closer.

"Dean... Think about what you're doing. You know this isn't you. Remember, we came here to stop the specter, he's controlling you."

Dave waved his gun to the side. "Get outa the way, Lara! This isn't about you!"

"Yes it is. Because Sam is my brother too- And you're not gonna kill him!"

Garth moved forward now. "Let's talk this out, buddy. You don't wanna do this."

"Don't tell me what I want. What I wanted was someone I could count on! I thought I had that, turns out I was wrong. Right, Sammy? You don't give a flying crap about me, about Lara or anything else! You left me to rot down in that stinking pit and for what? A girl?!" Dean kept the gun raised. "Everything I did for you over the years and you couldn't even fucking look for me?!"

Sam pushed Garth and I out of the way.

"I've apologized for that a hundred times, Dean! I made a mistake, we've all made mistakes!" Sam screamed.

"Mistakes, right. That's your excuse. That's always your excuse. The demon blood, Ruby, Lilith, everything. Those were all mistakes. Leavin our sister behind and not lookin for me? Yeah, mistakes!" He moved closer. "You're a selfish son of a bitch! After everything I've done. I sold my fucking soul for you!"

Sam suddenly lunged at Dean as they started pummeling each others faces in. For a moment Garth and I could only stand there in shock. It took Sam flying and smashing into a coffee table before we both snapped out of it.

Garth rushed over to stand in front of Dean and I moved to Sam who was bleeding from a busted lip.

"I'm sick of this." Dean went on. "I'm sick of looking after you, worrying what you're gonna do next. I can't count on you for jack squat, and I never could!"

Garth held up his hands. "Ok, let's stop and think about this. Calm down. Yeah, maybe Sam didn't look for you, maybe he has done some things that aren't so good. But he's your brother. And you've been looking out for him your whole life, and if you kill him now- You'll never forgive yourself, man. Just put the gun down."

Dean shook his head and I only then noticed a dribble of ectoplasm coming from his right ear.

"No-" Dean said. "I know who I can count on now. And it sure as hell ain't Sam. It'll just be me and Lara from now on."

He rose the gun and had every intention of firing, but Garth pulled back and socked him as hard as he could in the jaw. Dean stumbled backwards and as he did so the gun and the old coin fell from his hand and hit the ground. After the coin had clinked around on the floor Dean fumbled on his feet before shaking his head.

"What the hell?" He murmured in confusion.

"Are you ok, Sam?" I asked.

His jaw tightened, and his eyes still spat fire. "I'm fine."

Dean still didn't know what the heck just happened, as he wiped the green goo off of the side of his face.

"What happened?" He asked, cringing once he saw the ooze.

"Specter got you apparently." I answered, helping Sam up from the floor.

"And?" Dean then noticed the disarray of the motel room, and Sams busted lip. "Did I do that?"

"Yeah-" Sam cringed. "You did."

Garth knelt down and scooped up the penny. "It's gonna take a while to melt this puppy down." He looked from each of us awkwardly. "Hey, uh- Maybe I should do that somewhere else... You guys ok?"

Seeing is that Dean didn't know what the heck happened he nodded. "Think so, you sure you're gonna be ok? How's the specter not gonna get at you too?"

"I'm good. The specter only goes after people that hold grudges," He shrugged, smirking. "I don't hold any grudges. I let all of that go a long time ago."

He pocketed the penny and we each gave him an awkward goodbye. Well, other than Sam, who was still glaring at each of us from across the room.

"So-" Garth said. "If you guys have any problems, you know who to call." He pulled me into a hug. "Take care of yourself, girl. Don't go getting yourself killed again."

"I'll try." I replied sarcastically.

Dean and I watched Garth drive away, and once he was out of site he turned to me.

"What happened?" He asked. "Obviously I went postal?"

"More or less," I sighed. "Look, I think it's getting to the point where we need to have a little family meeting. You guys need to talk this out."

Sam lingered in the doorway, overhearing.

"What's there to talk about?" He asked. "Ya know, specter or not, the things Dean said were real."

"I don't even remember what I said, Sammy. So you can't really..."

"What, blame you?" Sam interrupted. "Yeah, Dean- I think I can. Let's face it, you say you're good but it's obvious now you're not. Yeah I get you're pissed at me for not helping Lara look for you, but you don't get why I didn't."

"So explain." I said. "Let's just hash this out so we can move on please?"

Sam leaned against the door frame.

"Her name was Amelia Richardson. When we met I was in a really bad place. After you disappeared, Dean- I lost it. I didn't know what the hell to do. So I started driving, and I didn't stop for weeks. I figured I could clear my head and then go back with Lara. But..."

"You met this chick and she changed your mind," Dean snorted out an unamused laugh. "Yeah I get it."

"It's not that. For the first time in a long time I didn't know what to do. Everything I did, all the mistakes I made in the past came rushing back after you disappeared. I thought you were dead, Dean- That's why I didn't look for you. And after I met Amelia she helped me to forget everything- To pretend that none of that never happened. I guess... Leaving after that was just too hard."

I sat on the end of the bed and stared at my feet. Yeah, I understood what he meant. For a few fleeting months Sam managed to find something that helped him completely block out all the horrible things that had happened. The demon blood, Lucifer, hell... Everything. Of course it would be hard to walk away from something like that, especially since the only thing Sam had ever wanted was to be normal.

As far as him leaving me behind, well- I was the third wheel basically in our little family. Wasn't a pleasant thought but I was. Which of course was why I clung to Cas so much, because I knew it would always be Sam and Dean til the end.

"Well," Sam shrugged. "Are you gonna say anything?"

In a way I think Dean understood. But still I don't think he was through punishing Sam. With Dean, family meant everything. And had roles been reversed and it was Sam that had vanished- Even if all signs pointed to him being dead, Dean wouldn't stop looking for him. He'd search until his least breath if he had to.

"Let's get cleaned up and hit the road." Was Deans response.


End file.
